I Imagine it'd be hard for the goblins to learn their lesson when none of them make it back to tell the other goblins how dangerous it is. They probably thought to themselves "gee, that raiding party we sent hasn't come back. It must have been some kind of paradise for them to want to stay" which would have made the fort a hot tourist destination. I don't think they're very smart.
@warriordx55208 ай бұрын
Sounds a lot like the American military
@tetrisgonzo37Ай бұрын
they ran away with the riches!
@megapussi8 ай бұрын
I like to imagine the failed siege went something like "guys our last group got entirely wiped out by ONE dwarf. Imagine what would happen if their entire army fought us!"
@SouthpawHare5 ай бұрын
Well, if no goblins survived to report back about what happened, then they had no idea what really went down.
@townbug8 ай бұрын
i love her disdain for shoes
@arthurbarros51898 ай бұрын
"Steel boots hurt my pinkies! I prefer my pig tail ones."
@iminumst78278 ай бұрын
Being an OP fighter with no shoes gives Toph vibes.
@gewisse_67863 ай бұрын
This comment is the product of Divine inspiration, will screenshot and print off thank you townbug
@tetrisgonzo37Ай бұрын
I hate (actually love providing unsolicited advice) to break your immersion, but it's just a conflict with her civilian sock/shoes combo. In order for her to wear steel boots, just select "uniform replaces clothing". Then manually add every single piece that she would have to wear.
@raziel63048 ай бұрын
A single soldier was brought down by the largest of armies... What if you upgraded to 2 soldiers?
@arthurbarros51898 ай бұрын
I'm usually drawn to having a master crafter of each kind of job I want. What if we did that with the weapons? One master of each? Sword, axe, hammer, mace, spear and crossbow. Pickaxe optional.
@unbannablebob3958 ай бұрын
Let's try not to go overboard here
@Morlair8 ай бұрын
@@arthurbarros5189 does pickaxe still scale with mining when used as a weapon? Years ago my militias were my miners for that reason... also because they needed armor when going through caverns for saftey
@arthurbarros51898 ай бұрын
@@Morlair yes, for fighting with a pickaxe, mining works like a weapon skill. The problem is the uniform thing. Hard to make activable mining squads that can also work normally. I don't think it's impossible. . Gonna make a squad of warrior miners called DeepRock tonight!
@Morlair8 ай бұрын
@@arthurbarros5189 Thats a good Idea. The way I did it before was just assigning everyone in the squads to always wear their gear, pick, and a shield. I think some dwarves are so small they use both hands for picks, but most are big enough for one handing them. Especially after you strengthen them up.
@tiagogarcia49008 ай бұрын
T Shoutout to the ONE goblin on 3:22 who decided they didn't want to get disemboweled today. Truly the wisest of all its peers.
@Doad_YT18 күн бұрын
it was actually so cool to see the other ones hesitating as well before he just booked it
@mendozakoby8 ай бұрын
Since exhaustion is the issue with well-armored dwarves, consider augmenting your one dwarf army by turning them undead if you have a necromancer citizen I had one undead soldier lose both arms then dodge a bronze colossus for 4 months before finally going down
@TheHuffur7 ай бұрын
Thats what you get when you only quickly gloss over the details, that was no ordinary necromancer, it was the NecroDancer venturing out of their crypt!
@liammiller26018 ай бұрын
4:54 I had that issue a lot too! For me, setting "Uniform replaces clothing" instead of "Wear Uniform over clothing" in the equip menu worked
@nairda555557 ай бұрын
*"Against all the evil that Hell can conjure, all the wickedness that dwarfkind can produce, we will send unto them... only you. Rip and tear, until it is done"*
@Rioluke888 ай бұрын
you could do a rotation where there are 4 soldiers and each is responsible for a single seasons' defense
@The_Custos7 ай бұрын
Sir Spring Sir Summer etc
@PumpkinCake4 ай бұрын
Sir Winter drew the short stick. Call him Father Goblin Christmas.
@HansLemurson8 ай бұрын
“Superior training and superior weaponry have, when taken together, a geometric effect on overall military strength. Well-trained, well-equipped troops can stand up to many more times their lesser brethren than linear arithmetic would seem to indicate.” - Spartan Battle Manual (quote from Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri)
@davidh82715 ай бұрын
Man, I haven't played the game in a decade but I can still hear the voice.
@NCNel-r5s8 ай бұрын
"Pitting one dwarf against the world is really just a fair fight." Yea, that seems about right.
@TurboImperator8 ай бұрын
The reason they dont wear boots is because you nned to put the "Wear instead of clothes" order (or was it replace clothing?) when creating an armor set for a squad. Otherwise, they absolutely refuse their boots, and prefer their linen flip-flops or whatever in combat.
@SuperAaaap8 ай бұрын
love the tight design style! Gonna try using some dormitaries instead of 3x3 rooms.
@remuluson29048 ай бұрын
Just make your one soldier a vampire and you are all set!
@arthurbarros51898 ай бұрын
Or one of those intelligent undead...! "No goblin shall pass while the Cursed Butcher guards the hall"
@ArcAngle11178 ай бұрын
Or a were wolf. Any injuries they have will be repiared at the full moon
@ArcAngle11178 ай бұрын
@@arthurbarros5189The optimal character would be someone with indefatigable, strong, and very fast. Upgrade them with necromancy some admantine gear and they would be unstoppable
@Alabar30008 ай бұрын
I was really hoping the super soldier to be kitted out with adamantine, artifacts and buried treasures.
@nickq80938 ай бұрын
that... honestly isn't *as* hard as it might seem (full set of armor not withstanding) the craft that dwarves make with strange moods will go off their highest of the "moodable" skills, so what you do is you use the manager system to have one forge with a permanently repeating craft weapon task that only allows completely untrained dwarves to use it. in a relatively short amount of time every dwarf will have skill level 1 weaponsmithing, you can also reasonably easily control which metals get used in crafting by forbidding all other metals when a dwarf gets a fey mood. repeat with level 2 armor smithing once a suitable artifact weapon is crafted.
@Kernel_Kertz8 ай бұрын
Recognizing the difference between FUN and fun... I feel seen.
@bloopahVIII8 ай бұрын
stories of these kinds of sieges are why i'm relived to have an artifact floodgate in a small hamlet next to a river
@burnin8able8 ай бұрын
While it probably goes against the spirit of the challenge, I bet using a locked door to only let the sieging goblins in a handfull at a time would give any dwarf super soldier enough of a break to weather basically any goblin attack.
@Faehen8 ай бұрын
but isnt the door captured if a single goblin passes it?
@hoodiehair8 ай бұрын
once invaders go through a door they claim it and you can't control it till it is retaken so I don't think doors would work. Same idea but with bridges and I think you could survive just about anything though.
@burnin8able8 ай бұрын
@@hoodiehair ah, yeah, fair.
@Krixooks8 ай бұрын
not to mention bodies & armour blocking the door open
@iminumst78278 ай бұрын
@@hoodiehair It actually does work since a door can't be "captured" if it's operated by a lever. I use lever door contraptions in my entrance to break invading armies into manageable chunks. The only thing is that doors can be blocked from closing if something is inside, so don't just use one door, you will want at least 3 adjacent doors to use as buffers.
@glassramen8 ай бұрын
See I always make large 2 or 3 wide halls with grand rooms since I always felt like there wasn't enough room for the dwarves to go around. Maybe I should be a bit more compact. It'd probably make things go so much quicker in my forts! Great video!
@JAPerson348 ай бұрын
Think the trick is to do both. The 3 wide hallways can be blocked with a drawbridge during a siege leaving the 1 wide entrance the only option until after the siege.
@glassramen8 ай бұрын
@@JAPerson34 That definitely works. In my current fort there's something similar. The main entryway is a 3 wide hall with a drawbridge to close it off, but there's a 1 wide side entrance with simple doors that leads straight into my barracks just next to the bridge, and then from there another hall goes from the barracks to the main hall. My intention was to close up the bridges and force the invaders/monster to push into the barracks to fight the soldiers that were stationed there. The main thing I was referencing though was that all of my halls are 2-3 wide, and it'd probably cut down the time to dig out my fort by a ton if I went with 1 wide halls for much of it.
@banaana12348 ай бұрын
@@glassramen 1 wide hallways will make everything go slower once built. The dwarwes will have to clamber over one another to get anywhere, slowing them and your computer down.
@SirChris3148 ай бұрын
this has inspired me to optimize my military by simply placing them each in their own sequential 3x3 room. If one dwarf is doing all that then why would I waste the others' time
@StylishHobo8 ай бұрын
I joined the Patreon today because my kids (daughter 11, son 9) love watching your videos with me and told me to. ❤
@drbangrim42058 ай бұрын
What I love most about you is how you just go into a Fortress and accept the most horrendous outcomes in order for an interesting story to play out! (Or plan the horrendous outcomes ahead)
@DuckeryDoo7 ай бұрын
I don't know why I got recommended it, but this video was a bit like seeing someones life story. I was hooked for some reason. I never even played Dwarf Fortress. I think I gonna give it a try! Thanks :)
@snickle19808 ай бұрын
Ah good, another hoodie video. Felt like ages!
@BGP3698 ай бұрын
its pretty cool that the military dorf was a migrant from your previous fort. One of the things i like about the game.
@HumanPersonNotOrangutan7 ай бұрын
Man, I used to play DF around... 10, 11 years ago must be? My tactic was always: - 2 lucky dwarves in small pass-through barracks - set them to eternal training with wooden weapons, shields, and whatever armor I could scrounge up - in the meantime, dig a long snaking 2 tile wide corridor - dig two channels in the corridor, remove ramps, place draw bridges - one pit/bridge at thr very entrance to the surface, the other just outside the barracks on the fortress side - turtle up, wait two years. Gather resources, find cotton candy, forge weapons and armor. Whistle a bit. Make sure the soldiers are still training. - when a siege comes, let them in, make sure every enemy is in the long snake corridor - raise the surface-side bridge - take a moment to behold my two sweaty oiled up blue-clad deities - watch the goblins, trolls, beak dogs etc be ground into fine paste by the pain train Good times, always fun to watch. I tended to always have a mace dwarf with a lead or preferably gold/platinum mace, and the other was whatever was my mood for the current playthrough. Once I did it with two legendary wrestlers, that was maybe less effective but somehow more metal with the two of them just manually dismantling the whole siege force limb by limb.
@TheOblomoff8 ай бұрын
Would expanding the entrance labyrinth have helped? If so, that means there's no defence too little. Only fortress not deep enough.
@christopherjones71918 ай бұрын
my thought exactly have a direct path for normal use and a second long zig zagging hallway just to compensate for dwarfs wanting to push the attack.
@CasualHamsterEnjoyer8 ай бұрын
thanks Hoodie, your videos the reason why i'm still coming back and playing DF
@JustDontDie8 ай бұрын
Fun idea and great video, but can we talk about that absolute banger of a thumbnail?
@MINIMAN100008 ай бұрын
The biggest flaw I felt I was seeing was the long hallways. The small winding hallways went well due to a lack of range for the goblins. It makes me wonder if you had a large number of winding hallways drastically increasing the distance so it could easily handle a 100 goblin army without increasing line of sight.
@diraska8 ай бұрын
How terrifying for the goblins in the back as the listened to the sounds of the dwarf hacking closer and closer.
@activationfunction7 ай бұрын
Heavily armoured like an Ironbreaker with combat skills and experience akin to those of a Longbeard. This pint size terminator was a death dealer among the dark and narrow corridors of the once mighty fortress. I am on a tangent here but I have always thought that the Dwarfs are extremely deadly in underground tunnel combat due to spacial restriction. The giant cave battles shown in Warhammer wouldn't make much sense because they were too spacious and didn't go well with the dwarf "blockage" tactics or the Skaven's ambushes.
@phearedphantom8 ай бұрын
[2:00] when you build a fort like that I get the feeling your about to flood ot with something eventually
@informitas01178 ай бұрын
Sad drunk is a mood.
@TarceGaming8 ай бұрын
I remember one time being besieged by an army of elves and the macelord captain of my squad ran out on his own and fought like a bear, killing 37 elves on his own until he met his match with an actual bear whom he traded mortal wounds with
@awsomesaucekirbyАй бұрын
"Pitting one dwarf against the world is just a fair fight" I'm using that
@kirklandday8 ай бұрын
Lol I just had the same problem when it comes to boots. You gotta select them as metal footwear, at least that's what I did.
@JaimeVallejo908 ай бұрын
Awesome idea and challenge. It's cool that you were strong and never considered changing the rules to 2 or 3 soldiers instead. :D Looking forward to your Adventure Mode videos!
@ToonedMinecraft8 ай бұрын
I think this might work with an undead warrior, since they don't get tired.
@xyonblade8 ай бұрын
reminds me of the "superdwarvinly strong, superdwarvenly tough, superdwarvenly agile" days where one soldier really could handle a whole siege single handedly with good steel equipment.
@zacharyweaver2766 ай бұрын
This is like if you had adventure mode but restricted to one fort and your job was just killing threats as the fortress was built around you. That actually sounds like a fun game now that I think of it
@VynalDerp7 ай бұрын
people are out here suggesting all these ideas to make this challenge more feasible but in reality all you need is a windier hallway. the dwarf only died when they went up the stairs where they got swarmed - a longer hallway that splits up the invaders better would have easily solved the issue.
@Ostsol7 ай бұрын
Brings to mind: "One riot, one Ranger."
@nelsonelloi37708 ай бұрын
I wonder if the single soldier could have won forever if they had full artifact armor
@arthurbarros51898 ай бұрын
Probably would have get tired a little later, but would still fall. Combat invincibility involves being inexhaustible, like being a vampire, necromancer or inteligent undead. (I don't recommend necros as they would raise dead and fight them at the same time).
@Wubs4Scrubs8 ай бұрын
Super fun idea! Do you think it could be done if you had a dwarf with exceptional stamina and really min maxed with armor?
@PlanetaJuegosPC7 ай бұрын
One dwarf in the right place can make all the difference in the world
@sp00l8 ай бұрын
Such an underrated channel
@tommerker80638 ай бұрын
if you want them to wear the boots you have to select the armor replaces clothing option when creating a new uniform
@feraraujo42918 ай бұрын
I love this format of video! can't wait to see what u will do in adventure mode
@leuchgaming30808 ай бұрын
This was before the adventure mode, building a super soldier after that WILL BE INSANE
@dylanmonstrum15384 ай бұрын
Goblins: KILL THEM ALL A single Dwarf: You can try Goblins: They're winning... Parlay?
@anomalous348 ай бұрын
When does adventure mode drop? I mean a time? Are you going to make AM videos?
@hoodiehair8 ай бұрын
not sure when it comes out tomorrow but I'll definitely be making videos
@anomalous348 ай бұрын
@@hoodiehair dope
@Reese-wg7jb6 ай бұрын
Warhammer Tier Legendary Hero
@Orelldo8 ай бұрын
You gotta force them to remove their civilian clothes when in armour, since they won't be smart enough to remove their own boots. And they can't fit the armoured boots over their civilian ones.
@samy579138 ай бұрын
From experience, dwarf are monsters and can solo siege, problem is whip, if it hits it will hit hard
@yeetman13448 ай бұрын
ye i tried this once when i discovered my manager was a intelligent undead when they cut a clown in half with a pickaxe as a result her stats limits were insane and they did not get tried the only thing that could kill them was Webs with eventually was the case
@the_epipan5 ай бұрын
If with just one soldier you managed to get your settlement to become the Capital, with the King of your civilization, and you even defeated some semi-megabeast... then maybe 2 soldiers are the really enough, haha, we'll have to try it ;)
@PortofTheUnkown8 ай бұрын
You should do a "Let's play series" and do long format video content, I'm sure people would watch!
@yuuzinh52687 ай бұрын
I've been wondering if I make the minerals generation sparse on my world, does that prevent my world to enter on a goblin era? Since they will have little to not access to good metals
@ultramarine01238 ай бұрын
Few war dogs would have been all you needed
@iminumst78278 ай бұрын
If you only have one person in the military, do they train slower since they are unable to watch demonstrations or spar?
@buddsbuddha8 ай бұрын
Why are these so fun to watch?
@Drakuba8 ай бұрын
and here i was, hoping for a story of a single mortal overcoming its physical limitations ascending to godhood
@tflcn6 ай бұрын
I just got crazy idea. What if you establish a WWF? Basically you are not allowed to kill wild animals and(!) forgotten beasts, instead you release them into the wild, where they belong. Either by capturing them, bringing to the ground and releasing or just making a way for them to escape caverns. Do you think it would be possible?
@pierredupont65268 ай бұрын
I always thought that you had to gave at least 2 soldiers for them to train weapon skills (through sparring)...
@oathkeeperofoblivion9728 ай бұрын
Hoodie hairrrrrrr lets goooooooooo
@ThatOliveMrT8 ай бұрын
A single dwarf is like 100 500kg bombs from helldivers 2
@halifay16683 ай бұрын
For a better selection you could use dfhack military sorting to find best suited candidates. It shows which dwarves have higher chances to win any kind of battle considering their attribute caps.
@Alfaromero-wh8yk24 күн бұрын
You could have sent her in a solo mission siege instead I'm sure the surroundings would have been razed to the ground
@TheMightyNaryar8 ай бұрын
So the main reasons why your militia dies is either recklessness or militia not wearing their equipment properly... sounds like some things never change. You can still make terminator dwarves though. Though they seem less godlike than in the really old versions.
@joar54958 ай бұрын
How about a hospital focused fortress. The game has so much medical functionality to play with! :) love the videos!
@Paulsinke8 ай бұрын
she fought the good fight
@ouryertus69308 ай бұрын
Who needs any soldiers at all just use magma 🤑
@coleandhisvideos8 ай бұрын
Amature hour Build a complex flood chamber instead
@arthurbarros51898 ай бұрын
Nothing beats cage traps to me. It is more to manage, but I can disarm them and do what I want. Including drowning, throwing them in magma pits, use as live exercise or even use as live bait in a giant cave spider silk farm. Goblins don't die of old age, so they're better than the last blue peahen.
@EvilNecroid8 ай бұрын
could they have survived if u made more snaking hallways upstairs?
@complexemotions3388 ай бұрын
sieges are the casual filter, not the challenge
@ppultra85548 ай бұрын
hoodie halgorithm cömënt
@The_Custos7 ай бұрын
Dastot the Destroyer
@thibs28378 ай бұрын
Is you can make a giant trap (fall, magma, drown, anything), i would gladly watch it
@the-0-endless3768 ай бұрын
this was awesome!
@AKvanguard8 ай бұрын
Now what if you were able to make them undead so they don’t get tired?😊
@internaut28 ай бұрын
Yep my militia commander had all the best character description to indicate that they'll be an unstoppable killer. But after the 1st or 2nd siege, they became incurably depressed. It's a game-breaking bug in my opinion. The fighters are too mentally fragile.
@dimitriskaffetzakis17464 күн бұрын
I don't like the demanded drama. You lost your fortress only because you chose it to die...
@rayaronitwitchybrow4 ай бұрын
Why did you lock her in a room with no engravings or nice furniture? 😭 poor girl was surely suffering from wealth withdrawals