"Horrible Objects" / A Collection of 6 Weird Tales

[@thefisherking78]

I like to put this stuff on and sleep the whole night with it playing. In no way do I come close to actually tracking the narrative, but I have some really wild dreams.

[@feltongailey8987]

I do the very same. And have had some wild rides too!

[@TruecrimeWithLeeLee]

Same here. So razing ⛱

[@justinparkerthewildwolf6394]

Yes I do too they're really great readings

[@thefisherking78]

@@justinparkerthewildwolf6394 then I come back to hear the whole thing for real when I'm awake

[@MissHellblazer]

@@thefisherking78 same here.

[@ScullyPop]

This is one of my favorite channels on the reading circuit.

[@Relief2205]

What is this Reading circuit

[@EnCryptedHorror]

'Reading circuit' - I hadn't thought of it like that! If you like this sort of thing, please give my new channel a try.

[@jenford7078]

Vanity LTD is such a wonderfully macabre story. Bravo, Ian!

[@HorrorBabble]

Thank you!

[@sub-jec-tiv]

Great sense of humor, and a terrifying climax, oof. Fantastic work.

[@lizbmusic11]

Settling into another long winters night with my favourite channel. Love from New Zealand 🇳🇿

[@zevrxn]

yay, one more collection i can put on when i go to sleep, it's been my favorite thing to do in the last months

[@alymcrobbie3676]

Falling asleep to this now headfones on in bed light low PERFECT Night lol

[@earthcat]

Same same same. Can't go to sleep without knowing about Warren.

[@chuzzthefuzz1908]

Yeah, me too!

[@samsonsoturian6013]

Caveat about the violin: Strings for both instruments and bows are traditionally made from animal intestines in all cultures. English and American Indian warriors alike would dissolve the innards of cattle in such a way to only leave the sinews, and these were stretched and dried to make effective strings. Making a magic violin out of a person follows the logic of European black magic perfectly.

[@0therun1t21]

Another great collection with some Ian Gordon in it, thank you! ...I think Vanity is the story that got me hooked on your writing, I'm totally a fangirl now.

[@donaldmccleary9015]

Awesome stories and narration. Thanks!

[@robbabcock_]

Thanks for a marvelous collection! 😎🔥👏

[@chrisu7022]

Vanity ltd has been by far one of my favorites ive heard lately. It was AMAZING!

[@itzfanaticplays260]

Because you have said that, I'm going to listen to it first, Thank You 😊

[@chrisu7022]

@@itzfanaticplays260 Hell yeah!

[@tonicastel5933]

It is excellent!

[@samsonsoturian6013]

About the magic mirror: That scheme wouldn't work for very long. The dealer and casino bosses would notice the win streak immediately and see the confederate with a mirror. They wouldn't know how it was done, but they would see they were getting some kind of assistance and kick them out.

[@RexytheRexy]

You're this gifted a narrator/voice actor *and* a very talented writer, to boot? I was wrong. You don't have *a* gift - you have two. I initially mistook Vanity, LTD for a work by one of the classic horror writers - were it not for the references to technology (and more adult content, which I take no issue with; it's merely an indication of a different use of language and subject matter to me), it would have passed for one of their works. Writing horror is no easy task. Please continue to (your work reminds me of Blackwood, which I mean as high compliment). P.S. I've introduced my spouse to your channel, and now, we're both hooked. Our videogame adventures and your readings go very well together.

[@adamwoodhouse7865]

Superb as always

[@mijiyoon5575]

Enjoyed these Ian & Jennifer ...Thank You 👍👍👍👍👍

[@ovhek1]

Vanity Ltd. is truly amazing.

[@donaldscholand4617]

This reminds me of an episode of the British comedy, "Red Dwarf", in which the character Rimmer, a hologram, makes a perfect copy of himself. Within a few days the 2 holograms hate each other with a white hot passion as Rimmer realizes that the only thing greater than his self-admiration was his self-loathing.

[@mwilson7842]

Interesting. Sounds like a good depiction of a narcissist.

[@sarahoshea9603]

You know what they say: "What you hate in another is that which you hate in yourself" 😉

[@JamesMC04]

@@mwilson7842 Arnold Judas Rimmer (to give him his full nane) is massively narcissistic.

[@sarahmiller1849]

*Thank you for the years of top quality entertainment you have given me, along with all the mental shivers*

[@suze6of6]

Woops I'm new I have binged for at least a month. I can't stop. Great stories. Excellent narration ❤ Love ya Suze' in Yuma, Arizona 😊

[@HorrorBabble]

Thanks for listening, Suze!

[@joz6683]

Having trouble sleeping so decided to listen to this update. I did not listen when I was 1st notified due to the length, I felt that I would listen over one or two days but might listen to it in one sitting. Thanks in advance for all the hard work. I am still in catch up mode with past stories however, I am not able to resist new stories!!!

[@suze6of6]

I'm new I have binged for at least a month. I can't stop. Great stories. Excellent narration ❤ Love ya Suze' in Yuma, Arizona 😊 ❤

[@starmezzo]

Excellent selection! Many of these were new to me. As usual, I enjoyed them very much. Thanks Ian!

[@terrybeal2252]

THE COAT reminds me of Lovecraft's THE PICTURE IN THE HOUSE. Don't get caught in the rain near creepy houses. 😬😱

[@willibeaa]

This story is so witty, sarcastic and funny my gosh! Exceptional writing and refreshingly off the beaten path. Lol Good stuff man!! 🤙🏾

[@JamieJohnson-eh4pc]

Ian, Bravo on Vanity LTD.

[@HorrorBabble]

Thanks!

[@JamieJohnson-eh4pc]

@@HorrorBabble No sir, Thank you, A veritable cure for ennui!

[@thelastsausage635]

Ian Gordon WOW, just listened to Vanity Ltd, absolutely fantastic story, compulsive listening, loved Nordic Mark, modern horror/ sci-fi stories are a refreshing change from the old ghost stories I love, just as spooky and unnerving too, fresh and original, thank you! just brilliant! 😍👍🇦🇺

[@HorrorBabble]

Thank you very much! Glad you enjoyed that one...! Ian

[@sandrargriffith3493]

well done. brilliant.

[@XadrumLtd]

Excellent, a new Van Melson! The lighter tone adds a new dimension to the character. Great stuff. 😊

[@goutambhola5646]

This is really my favorite channel. Great rolled all into one.

[@wmnoffaith1]

You have to love the good old days. In that first story, he has no problem getting the proprietor and all of the patrons to believe him, explain the situation, give him a stiff drink and calm him down. Alas, if this happened today, they'd call the police, he'd be sent to the ER, drug tested and then kept under psychiatric observation for 3 days against his will for psychosis. I was born in the wrong Era, lol.

[@sarahoshea9603]

I concur!

[@kiplinkaldahl1298]

Thank you SO much for disabling ads on your channel ❤

[@jeffashley5512]

My afternoon is covered nicely now. 🍿

[@justicepie314]

Another "Like" for all the coffee made during 'Vanity LTD.' Great story!

[@paulrevere2379]

No mention of metaphysical manifestations in the FAQ for the app. Comedic routine in an alternate universe: "If the FAQ in your App answers your question about metaphysical manifestations..."

[@Arwcwb]

I listen to these casually in the background so I didn't even notice the part about the orgy in Vanity Inc. the first time around :/

[@hereticsaint100]

The "artifact" stories are among my favorites.

[@joanmayer304]

I agree with you. There is something spooky about finding something you like, bringing it into your home and having it turn on you!! ❤️ from 🇨🇦

[@holgerstjohn6800]

O

[@hereticsaint100]

@@joanmayer304 right! They're much more interesting than the haunted house or creepy monster stories.

[@bobbymarcum772]

Yes one might say they are artifacts of horror.. oh horrorbabble did say that in a previous collection? I better go listen to that as well!

[@wolfieworby5653]

It takes an extraordinary talent to take an everyday item and make it truly terrible 😰 😂

[@IMjustAGirlInTheWorld1983]

Omg just flund your channel.and been nonstop Listening to you for the last 13 hours of my work day. You have an immediate sub and new super fan. Well done sir. Amazing writing

[@HorrorBabble]

Wow, thank you!

[@budahbaba7856]

The violin story was frigging awesome! :)

[@thetwitchywitchy]

1:00:23 HOLY FUCKING SHIT! 😂 I literally had to pause it because I couldn’t stop laughing, I just was not expecting him to say that 😂😂😂😂 I loved Vanity LTD! Fantastic job sir!!!!!

[@HorrorBabble]

He's an eloquent fella, that one!

[@unitedplankton2866]

These look like mostly new postings, so i can't wait to get into them at bed time...

[@noahswanigan9350]

Madame Blavatzsky wrote the last story?! I mean ... Ik it must have been a reworking but still. I wake up thinking about the rosy cross and King Arthur, look over and see the picture, not realizing whos name is on the tape for another 20 minutes ... Ah. Ya cant make it up lol If ya know, ya know.. Much love ^_^

[@MrsCaranAmy]

Yes. These are a wonderful collection of tales. I enjoyed them all immensely. The descriptions are are amazing. Thank you. Have a fantastic Friday.💖💖

[@cobrachicken07]

What an amazing collection. Love it!

[@feralbluee]

the last story had me on the edge if insanity!!! lol. no really, i wanted to stop listening, but i couldn’t. a lot like the other story about Paganini where takes a young violinist to meet a devilish character. Poor, incredible Paganini, in poor health, loving his little daughter, to have such myths bandied about. ~~all so beautifully read. thank you muchly :) 🌷✨

[@sandcat66]

Vanity LTD 🥰 Even swearing doesn't pale your eloquent delivery. Excellent story i love it

[@stevecausey545]

I don't have a doll house but my military miniatures seem to be exchanging furtive glances.....😊

[@angriella]

Read The Coat once years ago, stuck with me ever since!

[@thetwojohns6236]

For all of those who loved The Ensouled Violin, look for a movie (with Samuel Jackson, as you've never seen him) called The Red Violin. The two have many parallels, and one reminds me of the other. However, that said, keep in mind, the violin (and fiddle) has normally been associated with the devil, with the fiddle being considered, above all, the devils instrument. In pre-colonial and colonial America folk tales very frequently pit the devil against a fiddler or violinist. Further, during these periods, it was seriously considered to be a sin, a crime against God, to play the fiddle and violin on Sunday (this belief came to America from the Europeans that settled here). This adds more weight to the story's telling of the protagonist playing his violin on Sunday rather than go to mass with his mother. His sin of skipping mass, blaspheming, and then compounded by the greater sin of playing on Sunday, shows his colors more than the exposition of his history of the occult. Indeed, playing and glorifying the violin on Sunday, would have been considered an even greater sin than that of spiritualism, at that time. Sorry about the ramble, but there is an entire history throughout the entirety of Western Civilization involving sin and the violin. This makes a huge and poignant statement during this story. Id love to discuss these ideas further with the author if they are willing. I expect they know of this history as much as I. Edit (additional text)

[@pattymullin8515]

What a fabulous post! I never knew any of the information you provided. I will find the Samuel L. Jackson movie tonight. He is one of my favorite actors - there is no one else like him. I don't think any actor can project a greater sense of ice cold fear and sinister danger than he can. Thank you for the violin/fiddle information. I loved it!

[@thetwojohns6236]

@@pattymullin8515 hope you liked the film. If you're like me, you were hoping he could pull it off.

[@pattymullin8515]

@@thetwojohns6236 I definitely was hoping he would pull it off!

[@shastaleann8871]

Sounds like Charlie Daniels band's "The devil went down to Georgia"...

[@tomcurran8470]

See Charlie Daniel' "The Devil Went Down to Georgia."

[@theangriestcatintheworld]

I've been saving this one (excited meows)! 💙

[@robertfoster2988]

I really am on a fixed income I wish I could give because I really love what you guys do

[@AlgorithmEngagementEntity]

Engaging engagement algorithm algorithm 🏴‍☠️

[@noahswanigan9350]

Relistening to this.. Hearing Ian say fuck is so rare, it makes it so awesome when he actually cusses 😂

[@veronikalynn5084]

Vanity Limited was straight out of Black Mirror. Fantastic writing. I would donate to a kickstart for a short film or anything similar, if ever that would be a possibility ✌🏻

[@DocZ82]

And as always, you rock.

[@igorurbanowicz1587]

God I love this Chanel

[@MissHellblazer]

I would very much appreciate if in one of the next collection of sci-fi horror stories you could include "axiomatic" by Greg Egan. A truly unforgettable masterpiece. I would so much love to hear it by Ian.

[@karljunge]

vanity ltd. has an excellent personal lesson for me

[@mauricedavis8261]

Top notch indeed!!!👍👌👻

[@stocos1]

NOICE!!!

[@scatdog1]

I think you meant to say NO ICE !!!

[@michaelwatt968]

Nice work IAN! Hey what painting is that?

[@williamfawkes8379]

A nice collection, I've listened to them all before, but sometimes its good to have a nice big block.

[@kaziahmyren-zobel1925]

No one: Absolutely no one: Old horror story: *hits you over the head with a short but intense burst of racism*

[@sarahoshea9603]

It's the only threat in the genre; 1 min your making eggs and listening to a nice story and then... ur so drenched in casual discrimination that you sort of want a shower. 🤷‍♀️ Do u want to be safe or do you want stories? Recreational hazard 🤷‍♀️

[@peterpuleo2904]

""Snatcher" by Dean Koontz, is about a stolen purse, and the sorry fate of the thief.

[@Drifter2025]

Delightfully executed

[@johnniejackson899]

S

[@SP-kh7dp]

The dolls house is my favourite

[@wolfieworby5653]

The social commentary for Vanity Ltd. is a tad bold. But superbly written as always... Are you considering a full deadly sins series perhaps, Mr Gordon? 😉 😜

[@wolfieworby5653]

PS: If anyone wants to draft up a petition to make this one into a Simon pegg movie I'm totally on board with that... 👉 👉

[@askwhy2030]

Good stuff Thanks!!

[@awarningtothecuriouswerewolves]

Do any of these stories involve a Whoopee Cushion? Cheers Warren, kicked out of the Underworld for trolling the Trolls & other paranormal beings!

[@theangriestcatintheworld]

It's Warren! Cheers matey! >

[@awarningtothecuriouswerewolves]

@@theangriestcatintheworld -- Cheers Angriest! When you stopping by my place for a visit? Hint: there are cats! Cheers Warren, who had a cat army in the Underworld!

[@theangriestcatintheworld]

@@awarningtothecuriouswerewolves I'm often lurking round your channel-- I'll be sure to wave a paw at you next time!! 🐾

[@awarningtothecuriouswerewolves]

@@theangriestcatintheworld -- Well, shiver me whiskers, it will be a paws that refreshes! Cheers Warren, who is a lurker himself!

[@awarningtothecuriouswerewolves]

@Andrew Phillips -- lol -- for a moment there, I thought you wrote Troll! Cheers Warren, reincarnated as a droll troll!

[@newworldman2112]

I feel like the great Neil Peart read some of this

[@eymannassole6162]

I'm sure I'm not the first to ask, but are you ever interested in reading "amateur" works?

[@HorrorBabble]

We accept submissions from time to time via our website. Not at the moment though unfortunately.

[@jeremygriffin620]

What a sublime female voice!

[@eponymousmann5088]

Lovely lilt, although I found the cadence a little too mechanical, like a metronome. Precision and delicacy, yes, but the rhythm is too predictable. Do you agree? Maybe it's just me.

[@romansmirnov961]

@@eponymousmann5088 Yeah he doesn't play around with the pauses between words and sentences.

[@strangetrip837]

Like listening to Dickens, maudlin insincerity

[@Inannawhimsey]

I remember reading this wierd story where a shoplifter steals a coat that turns out to eat the shoplifter alive. Strange story.

[@gohboy56]

@ Inannawhimsey. You call that strange? I feel it serves to remind us not to steal...even if the punishment might be a tad extreme 🤣🤣🤣

[@Inannawhimsey]

@@gohboy56 See? Another strange one was by fellow classmatez aboot a woman whose chest got revenge on a looky loo by beating them senseless lol

[@brandonkim3091]

Taylor: " You're Mr. Birman! 😠You're Mr. Birman! 😡 I'M MR. BIRMAN!!!🤬 Is anyone else Mr. Birman?!👀😠" Mr. Birman: "Meow!"

[@georgemink1813]

Who narrated "The Black Stone Statue"? She sounds a bit familiar, but I can't place it....

[@HorrorBabble]

That'll be Jennifer.... she's the other half of HorrorBabble. :) Ian

[@southernjustice9127]

Interesting.

[@Morboeatspeople]

The Black Stone Statue, reminds me of a great Dick Miller movie, where he plays a mentally handicapped man who wants to be an artist... ...and finds a way.

[@listerjne]

vanity ltd is so freaking good bro i enjoyed when you said fuck that was awesome 👍

[@listerjne]

soooo fitting in this collection too but guaranteed stand out no matter the competition. seriously fantastic job, love your mind and your pacing my king!!!!

[@jolenelittlewood7978]

All round pressure, Ian and all at H.B. MY MIND SLEEPS BUT YET ,MY minds eye is open to the terrors of the unconscious. Been with u guys,around a year but binged everything u have,best for me and my man myles was ,the story of the man on the moors lost in the snow,the way you portrayed the three men and most of all death,/scientist of the universe made me feel warmth and a sense of calm, your voice is so beautiful that I don't take drugs to sleep,

[@willam1992]

yay

[@stephensinclair3771]

This is great 👍. Can I imagine buying this as a paperback anthology back in the day 😀 😉 with a suitably lurid cover. "Edited by Ian von Blackheath and company. Notoriously known to be members of the golden coffee break. Said to have a copy of dr Dees translation of the Necronomicom on the same table in the staff room as those naught mags edited by Graham maste4tone". 50p. Edited for spelling.

[@PrinceApollo117]

A hippogriff brought me here

[@Bbergster]

Is that an audiobook thing? Creepy pasta... Mr creep. The others are a let down after being fattened on Dr Ian.

[@PrinceApollo117]

@@Bbergster no, there is a Brony KZbinr with a hippogriff avatar named silver quill

[@pamelawhitfield339]

Keep listening to these so interesting 🤓🤫

[@kruser-gx6vq9gu3y]

ПРИКОЛЬНО!жалко языка не знаю !

[@bunyipz2040]

Exactly

[@rickyhurtt5568]

You tell em

[@TheChristianNomad]

Vanity LTD had a terrible ending, it passed on both of the better and impactful endings and instead opted for a low whimper for an ending. Too bad, it had promise.

[@listerjne]

bro i had an epiphany

[@listerjne]

vanity ltd? more like. markiplier.

[@HorrorBabble]

[@messerschmitt6384]

I don't exist

[@alymcrobbie3676]

Well now your just bragging ,showoff lol

[@messerschmitt6384]

@@alymcrobbie3676 I has to change my name , ironically Messerschmitt don't exist either. Horrorbabble and HP Lovecraft and Victorian era literature is fantastic. Good to share this underrated and forgotten art with others who appreciate the Art. Messerschmitt BF-109 g6 best thing ever Next on list. 10-4

[@Bbergster]

Can u prove it?

[@messerschmitt6384]

@@Bbergster in spades

[@messerschmitt6384]

@@Bbergster PS it's not what I know , it's what I can prove... However , my personal prespective and requirements are not conguent with any of the 5 statutory declarations AKA legalese or color of law it's kangaroo Courts Kabbalahist Kalergie kosher Tax , income tax, property tax- A- tion w/o representation or it's board room shareholders who select whom they have invested interest as My Representative and listen to only evidence that increase Crease's Quarterly dividends OR have surpassed that no Have Been selected as God's representatives on Earth and make disinfranchment a word more palatable than The Cattle or systemic The Boogyman w/o a name ,face or any way to Prove the individuals who compromise the conspiracy Let alone if these high performance excellent elitists are all on The Same Page of the talmud to specify what the requirements for Provability exactly are?

[@justicepie314]

Six "Likes" for 6 different tales.

[@2476bunny]

i though pagenine was the page after page 8 lol

[@frankfielder]

You sound just like Karloff.

[@szabolcsmezei4088]

"Bubblewrap..."

[@garrymules961]

Warren Warren wdf is Warren?

[@lightclawshadowmarsch8167]

Its like Facebook meta.

[@tomcurran8470]

Another story that I could have easily written, lol. These will never be written again, which is sad to ponder.

[@emadbagheri]

The lady narrator has a weird halting way in her speech, I couldn't listen to her, with all due respect.

[@feralbluee]

dear Emad - just so you know (as i didn’t at first) for future listenings :). that’s Jennifer Gill, Ian’s mate, and she’s worked quite much on her voice and reading style. She has gotten so much better. i’m quite proud of her :). she also produces the videos. 🌷😌

[@emadbagheri]

@@feralbluee I'm very thankful to all who produce this content, and perhaps my personal feeling should have stayed just that lol As a none native speaker of the English language I read and listen to well written and spoken words as much as I can, I have noticed what maybe a specific style of oratory among some which I ascribed to her, which is to fully pronounce each word with emphasis and then allow a very subtle pause before committing to the next word. I maybe over sensitive to that as my mother language of Persian is spoken very rapidly and with the sounds of the ending and beginning of the words merging into and leading one another.

[@johnklee5604]

Hahaha

[@chrisfisher2469]

Vanity Ltd as a story is a disappointment....

[@JanetCaterina]

Sorry, I can't follow the stories at all