HOW CPTSD Changes YOU FOREVER ||Psychotherapy Crash Course

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Complex PTSD can be one of the most complex set of symptoms for clinicians. One of the reasons why is because it isn't a true diagnosis in the most recent DSM (book of diagnoses), although it should be. In this live chat, I break down PTSD and CPTSD when you grow up in an unhealthy parent-child relationship: kzbin.infob9B-sfvzJhY.

[@jw911]

Yes, and when you strive to or actually exceed the unreasonable "expectations," these sick mothers will try to discourage, sabotage, and/or diminish your goals or accomplishments. You can never please them! 25 months of no contact, and it took about 18 months for me to get out of the FOG. No contact is not for everyone, but it has been my saving grace! Stay strong!

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

I agree. I don't want to delete this comment but we are not to use profanity. I get it but KZbin and I have a no profanity rule. If you could edit that out that would be great. If not KZbin or I will have to delete it. :(

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Thank you for changing this!!

[@jw911]

@@TherapistTamaraHill Thank you for informing me! I appreciate the work you do!!! 🙏

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Thank you!

[@jw911]

@@TherapistTamaraHill Ms. Hill you are owed the thanks, not I! So, thank you!

[@maribelsuarez-roman4532]

My heart goes out to all of those adult children who survived such parents. This video was as if you knew these parents and the internal scars left behind. Thank you for helping us understand CPTSD as we put the pieces together and move on in life. Bless you❤️

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

🤗💖thank you for those beautiful words. And you're welcome. So glad this is helpful.

[@AdamantlyAdams]

The behavioral patterns that lead to my CPTSD. So, when I heard that my mother's husband died, I laughed about it. I granted them mercy, but I don't forgive em. I inherited trauma from my mother and her husband, not from my father's side. I had to relive it when my mother became a foster parent. She treats her foster children horribly. It's like walking in on the same stuff I grew up in. Violence is never okay. 😢

[@TerenaTCloud]

The really interesting part of cptsd for adult children of narcissists is that there are ZERO consequences for parents bc they don’t care in the first place.

[@carolinekamya2339]

because they refuse to take accountability for anything and we know it

[@AdamantlyAdams]

The physical abuse. Ex. When the parents turn the belt using the buckle end. Add anger, rage, and bystanders. It's communal.

[@fatcatontario]

Thank you so much for highlighting this very important topic. My mother is a diagnosed narcissistic psychopath and is in her late 50s completely relying on me financially. I feel completely trapped.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome! It's my pleasure. And I'm sorry you have to take care of her and I'm sure take a lot of her abuse. The best thing you can do for yourself is learn protective defenses until it's all over. I will try to talk about this in the coming week.

[@fatcatontario]

@@TherapistTamaraHill /Thank you! I will look for your guidance on this topic ❤

[@fatcatontario]

@@caligirl9403 I hope you move out of her house soon and heal. I have mostly dated narcs and sociopaths as well since this is the only relationship model I know and have made a decision not to date for a while. One's narc abuse is more than enough for me :)

[@truth4utoda]

Thank you love for this. I am binge watching this one because my husband is here and he needs to hear this.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome 🤗

[@bonnywhite8205]

Tamara thank You for very informative lecture. Every time I listen to You, I learn something new, it always helps me to understand what happens in my family- with emotionally abusive narcissistic grandma (now over 90) and two aunts,her daughters. I'm so grateful to You for explaining things. You made me realize what is not acceptable, what narcissism is. Thank You so much! Recently I've decided for a therapy, IFS to overcome my traumas - hope it helps too. Greetings from Europe, Austria. All the best for You, God bless You 🙏

[@martacore6518]

You hit on the nail. I love your videos. Helping a lot with my trauma❤

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Thanks so much!! so glad you are finding these videos helpful!

[@CulinaryCreations_4U]

Thanks, Tamara for such an informative and educational video. Coming from a broken home with no stability or support, I have a narc father and an absent mother, and I can relate to this video. To this date, I still have deep-seated pain for not understanding the lack of love and support I never had from my parents. I try to sweep things under the rug, but every couple of years it comes back stronger, and now I'm at the point of an emotional breakdown and it is affecting my day-to-day life. Do you do online sessions, if so what are your rates? Hello from England.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome! And thank you for watching. Glad this was helpful. I'm always sorry to hear when children do not experience the unconditional love that is needed to grow into healthy adults. Life is just a bit more difficult for these kids as they become adults. I currently cannot take on new clients as I am maxed out for the next few months. However, I am offering consultations. If you are interested or feel this could be helpful, please email me at the email address in the description box!

[@wellingtonsboots4074]

I don't know if my mother was a narcissist, looking back i think she was more frightened than anything and maybe suffering CPTSD herself. I'm 67 and was given a CPTSD diagnosis recently. I remember the abuse as a kid and all her remarks she would make. For years after she died i still could hear her voice in my head. When i was told i had CPTSD, it was a kind of relief, i wasn't mad. I was just abused and i need to do what's necessary to sort it out and come to terms with it.

[@pennyc7064]

Thank you Tamara for this informative video! I feel quite sad, as everything you discussed happen to me. I didn't know about the term complex ptsd. I wonder if there is any relationship between cptsd and migraines. I often get a migraine when I feel like I have no emotional support when faced with a difficult decision and also when I get angry that I'm being taken advantage of.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

I'm so sorry Penny. 😔 There is certainly a connection between physical health conditions and CPTSD. Here is an article that talks about PTSD and migraines mantracare.org/therapy/ptsd-trauma/migraine-ptsd/#:~:text=Migraine%20and%20PTSD%20are%20two%20conditions%20that%20are,lead%20to%20better%20treatment%20options%20for%20both%20conditions. We certainly need more research on the impact of CPTSD. Praying for your strength.

[@pennyc7064]

@@TherapistTamaraHill thank you for your reply and the link to the article.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome

[@GenX888]

The trauma follows into individual’s adulthood and into the individual’s relationships in all aspects of their lives because they may still be using their childhood tools they adapted to into adulthood.

[@user-hn1sw4cf7x]

Fantastic

[@CherrysJubileeJoyfully]

Awww just missed it no Stims is awful for narcolepsy

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

No worries! Hope to see you Friday.

[@LaureneSmith-s4c]

Diagnosed with CPTSD

[@DeborahOlander]

Why do you always pick on the mom. It's just as bad when your dad is the narcissist.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Well, not every mom is a good mom. We have to pull that out of the shadows and talk about it. Next life chat is on fathers. They are equally to blame in some cases. And I don't know if you saw my older video on psychopathic dads: kzbin.info/www/bejne/f4TUn36IbtOLrck.

[@truth4utoda]

Come on Deb. Are you serious? That's kinda rude. She does talk about dad's. It is not her fault that mothers are frequently the issue in some cases. Sounds like maybe this hit home.😢

[@truth4utoda]

​@Támara Hill, MS NCC CCTP LPC you answered this graciously. I wouldn't. 😅

[@DeborahOlander]

​@truth4utoda I phrased my comment poorly. What I was trying to convey is that focusing on the sex of the parental narcissist is not necessarily helpful. Just focusing on the fact that one or.both parents may be narcissists and that both cause CPTSD. Does it matter if the abuse, lack of caring connections, etc. are from a mom vs a dad?

[@DeborahOlander]

​@@truth4utoda It only "hit home" so to speak, because it was my father, not my mother who was the narcissist and who caused the overt emotional abuse I have suffered my whole life.

[@louniece1650]

It continues after moving out by having friends who mimic what you're used to and/or dating, marrying someone who mimic the same behaviors. I'm struggling with this right now.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

That's a very good point. It's called trauma "re-enactment." You re-enact any trauma that you have had in the past and may find yourself in similar relationships or with people who are similar to the ones who caused your trauma to begin with.

[@age93]

@@TherapistTamaraHill this is one reason why it's so crucial to address past trauma, correct? I've been working through childhood wounds, and my family has been making it sound as if I want to stay in a trauma cycle and not move forward when that is the exact opposite. I feel as if it's just a manipulative way to smear and shame me.

[@citizenkang2524]

My sister's stonewalling and overall narcissist abuse have come tumbling down north of the Mason-Dixon Line and are the verge of getting flattened south of the Mason-Dixon Line. I have now allied with the very folk who can help me that she attempted to keep me isolated from.

[@newadventures7222]

I think that covert narcissistic mothers do the same things as malignant or overt narcissistic mothers. They’re just good at hiding it so it’s potentially even more confusing. Would that be right? Thanks so much for addressing c-ptsd. It’s so needed.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

You're welcome! I agree. We need more videos and clinical awareness on this for sure. And yes, you are right about the cover and malignant mothers.

[@puddlesplasher7]

@TherapistTamaraHill Can you please make a video about mother-daughter sexual abuse? You're so level-headed and knowledgeable -- thank you for your efforts in psychoeducation of the public!!

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Yes, absolutely! I will add it to the list. And thank you for these kind comments. 🤗

[@Man_of_Tears]

I appreciate your videos!

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

Thank you! And I'm glad my videos are helpful.

[@Man_of_Tears]

​@@TherapistTamaraHill Is there a tip for what to do when responsibility for yourself seems to come upon your own shoulders? In the video is mentioned to have no one to turn to with a narcissitic mother/parent. Of course I have Jesus, but furthermore I have no idea what to do in such a situation.

[@truth4utoda]

😢 It could be possible I have cptsd too.

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

It is possible you could have suffered PTSD and then experienced additional traumas that caused the CPTSD. We have yet to create or find any clinical measures that could help us understand how to measure CPTSD as we do other disorders such as anxiety.

[@fairygurl9269]

💞Compassion

[@TherapistTamaraHill]

🤗

[@nancyP7448]

Can something be done if I have high Cortisol?

[@939449]

That was my whole childhood in a nutshell.