How Do I Recover After Being Fired?

How do I regain my confidence after being fired? How do I talk about being fired? Can I recover from being fired or is my career over? These are the questions we will answer in today's episode of Dev Questions.
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[@randyriegel8553]

I worked a very well known Health Insurance company in Pittsburgh. The IT manger that hired me was cool as hell. As long as I got my stuff done he didn't care about breaks, long lunches, etc. He left the company and then another lady took his position (she was dumb as a brick). She started micromanaging so badly our team was almost afraid to take a bathroom break. She bitched at me about being late because I was in traffic for 2 hours. It was almost a relief... I actually told her when I got fired at 4pm... "Couldn't have you done this earlier so I could have beat traffic?" :) New company I'm at is mostly work from home. No one keeping track of me. I told my boss which is VP of Technology that I had to take a long lunch cause I had some errands to run and that I'd make it up. He responded with "I'm not babysitting you do what you want as long as projects are being handled." And laughed about me asking for permission.

[@IAmTimCorey]

A good manager is REALLY important.

[@PatientXero607]

Been there and done that with idiot Directors on power-trips. In the midst of Projects System Administrator and a Projects Coordinator quitting with projects getting behind, I was being pressured to complete projects with no QA being applied to them. Why did they pressure to completion? No money was being paid unless the project was completed. Well this happened 6 months ago. A QA was missed after a project was supposedly transferred to another team. This led to GPO's being missed and not checked by someone else. Technicians from another department starting making 'band-aid' fixes to get the file shares working on an old file server that was supposed to be decom'd. I tried to fix the situation by transferring files to the new file server and fixing the GPO's once more. I couldn't afford a change management ticket to wait for client approval, this had to be done immediately. Well, in client frustration and fear of losing this client, the MSP fired me to ensure the client stayed on. Well, I hope that client in the end finds a competent MSP. If they fired the one that I use to work for, I hope it opened their (MSP's) eyes to improve their processes to properly train and correct staff errors instead of just canning them for a simple mistake. Sh!t Happens as they say. Employers need to learn to grow from it and not just toss an employee on a single incident.

[@somfierce]

I got let go on Tuesday and this is genuinely helping me process the barrage of frenzied half-thoughts and emotions I've been having. Introspection, accountability, and acceptance are so important

[@IAmTimCorey]

I’m glad it was helpful. I’m sorry you are going through this.

[@arnotek]

Great advice all around. For a vast number of people that get fired, it best thing that ever happened to them. (Although it does not feel like it at the time!) It provides for other opportunities and in many cases, leads to far better situations.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thank you! It definitely was a great thing for me, but I had to get out of the weeds to see it.

[@sg-zd8eb]

I was fired 13 years ago and never had a job since. For me it’s been one of the worst things to happen in my whole life.

[@arnotek]

@@sg-zd8eb I am very sorry to here that. "Normally" after a period of time, people move on to other (and better) things that they never would have done otherwise. Unfortunately, as you stated, that does not always occur. I am sorry that I have nothing that can help your situation.

[@cryingdove0]

Why I was let go and the story in the beginning is exactly what happened to me. My boss was micromanaging everything I did, and in fact just re-wrote a lot of my work because he wanted it done his way. I tried to codify what he wanted, and it seemed like what he wanted constantly changed. I was so checked out from being undermined and feeling like I couldn't do a good job because I didn't know what a good job was. Then I was let go. The conversation was about 2 minutes long with my boss. It's humiliating to be fired, but I'm trying to be honest with myself and hold myself accountable where I could have done better.

[@IAmTimCorey]

That's hard, but I'm glad you are working on learning from what you can of a bad experience. Being able to clearly define what a boss wants is a key to success. When you find yourself not producing what the boss wants, there is a disconnect in communication. If you can fix that communication issue, it greatly helps your chances of fixing the rest of your problems.

[@Keem_Software_229]

I know this is a year later but when I tell you I opened KZbin and this was the first video I saw. I was literally let go last Friday. I worked as a Software Developer for 4 years and 11 months. This being my first career and it has been tough trying to put the pieces back together after this layoff but just watching this video shines a light on my current situation. Im past the point of being angry and now Im working on getting myself out there to figure what’s next for me. I hope I can find job that’s perfect for me.

[@IAmTimCorey]

I'm glad it was helpful to you. Best wishes on finding what is next. I hope you find a great job. Remember, your job doesn't define who you are. You get to do that. You've got this.

[@IMustHaveThatApe]

Fantastic insight. Forget software development, this advice could be extended to almost any area in life that involves conflict and disagreement.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thanks!

[@OscarAgreda]

Great video! It's truly impressive how you connect with your audience and provide amazing advice and empathy. I have watched a couple of your videos and they are by far the most complete resources I have found on the internet based on your teaching skills. I agree with you, it happened to me as well and it ended up being the best thing that ever happened to me. It was hard to see it from that perspective back then, but now I am so glad it happened. Looking back, the company I used to work for with their outdated software, due to bureaucracy they were too afraid to use new technologies, now when I think about it, compared to my Blazor Web Assembly, Domain Driven Design, and C# Clean Architecture, my present is 1000 times better than when I was laid off.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thanks for sharing! I'm glad you are at a better place now.

[@Eliphasleviathan93]

Just now getting the confidence and drive to get out there again after being let go last April. Needed this video then lol. Props for making it though, because it will help speed up that recovery process for some people.

[@IAmTimCorey]

I'm glad you are getting back out there.

[@resurrectingexcellence]

This is a great video. Thank you 😊

[@IAmTimCorey]

You are welcome.

[@jordanloar5564]

Thanks for the video. Your situation describes mine pretty closely. Thank you for the hope, encouragement, and honest advice.

[@IAmTimCorey]

I am glad it was helpful.

[@justinerdmier]

Thank you; this was literally perfect timing. I was just laid-off from my first dev role because of the lack of work. I worked for a small, local consultancy that built custom software for clients, so it wasn't like it was because of the recent trend of tech lay-offs, but still... I really got depressed there for a moment. I appreciate you taking the time to talk about this and sharing it.

[@IAmTimCorey]

I am glad it was helpful.

[@faisalalhoqani6151]

Great episode, dear Tim, your episodes are not only valuable for our field but also about life keep it up dear.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thanks!

[@ibuprofenPill]

I’m a senior software engineer and was let go today. I was not fired for cause, rather for cost saving measures. It was no fault of mine. Not taking it personally is damn near impossible. It’s the fact you can’t plan life anymore that hits hard, everything is put on hold until you reestablish another source of income. It effects my mental and spiritual health. At 54 years old it gets tougher every time it happens. This is the 4th time in 12 years.

[@IAmTimCorey]

That's rough! I'm sorry it happened to you. I hope you find a great place next.

[@keyser456]

Good advice on recovering from being fired. On a related note, I don't view interviews as being interviewed. I'll answer their questions, but I'm really there to ask the questions to see if they will be a good fit for me. I don't need them so much as they need me. If they don't need or want what I bring? No sweat off my back and best of luck to them finding somebody better.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Yes, an interview should be a two-way conversation. The trick is to not need the job so badly that you have no ability to walk away.

[@captainkirk9700]

Thank you for bringing this necessary step that all software developers go through, or will at some time. In my thirty year career, I was fired three times. I was also given honorary awards at these companies to.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thanks for sharing!

[@higherpurpose1212]

I haven't experienced being fired yet, but here I am thinking of quitting eventhough I'm grateful to the company and my boss for giving me a shot at the role, it's has a decent pay, good mentors. But the bottomline is, like Tim, the work is not giving me the satisfaction and learning at the end of the day. We're basically working on a project that fixes bugs on a very complex, spaghetti like code without documentation and is around 20 decades old. It's like trying to write C++ software commercially with just the fundamentals of programming skills, that's how this system is built. I get the pay, no problem, I'm happy with the boss, but I always end up wasting time on unimportant things and not being focused because I'm not interested in what I'm doing. But there's also the anxiety of finding a replacement job and what I'll do next with recession looming and economy is on a slump.

[@GrampaCaligula]

Good video - some of these lessons are some I had to learn the hard way. 🤣 I *can* say that you'll always find the best fit when you decide not to make any compromises on what you truly want. It's those compromises that will eventually lead to dissatisfaction.

[@IAmTimCorey]

That’s true. It is hard to do, though, when it feels like you don’t have great options.

[@GrampaCaligula]

​@@IAmTimCorey Absolutely! The mantra that got me through that time: being fired frees me up for a job that I will actually want. 🤣😭🤣

[@ChoccyMewk]

Awesome video! I really like your process ❤

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thank you!

[@theirishfalcon2668]

Good presentation man. I will acknowledge that I too have some faults when it comes to productivity. I do IT support for many companies and I do tend to sometimes procrastinate because either I don't care enough or something I don't know and I hope to stall enough time to get help on something I don't know about and then it just ends up being pushed to the back burner. I also tend to get distracted as I'm basically sitting at a desk for hours on end and when it's a slow day or slow several hours it gets really boring so I tend to be on my phone listening to podcasts or watching KZbin videos at the corner of my eye. But I will say common denominator of all my jobs is when Management starts micromanaging everything. When they start micromanaging everything they tend to get me stressed out and I start making mistakes as I have a particular way of doing things that bring many results. Now I'm willing to change if it means I can keep my job but if you start dictating every single move I make and watch me closely all day expecting me to follow it to the letter then I tend to become unmotivated to even do the job therefore I have apathy for the position so the employer has no choice but to fire me. My first full time job taught me that micromanagement is a terrible way to go as the boss I worked for really didn't care how I got it done just as long as I got it done and folks were happy with the results and it was even a bonus if I could keep things fixed either permanently or for long term. That's the best kind of boss I could ask for as they trust my method enough to leave me to my own devices and I tend to ask less questions and do more action.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thanks for sharing.

[@aimene_.]

Recover, this word means a lot of what software developers suffer nowadays. I consider that as one of the most stressful jobs in the world. Be strong guys 💪 thank you Tim to be here. Your videos help us so much

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thank you!

[@metalhead6604]

Yep. It's also a shame that employers don't want to tell you why they fired you because of legal exposure.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Agreed. That feedback can be an important part of the healing process. If it really was something you were doing wrong, you could work to change it. If you disagree that it was wrong, you can work to let the frustration go and find an employer who agrees with you on that subject (if it is important).

[@Richard-jm3um]

So many Layoffs! We need a Tech Worker Union to protect our interests!!

[@sdbulbasaur]

I was let go on probation a few a days ago. i am still a little hopeless but now i felt that i lack a little bit of communication with the team lead too, as he said we were not able to find projects for you. So i should have asked more about projects but i thought i was working and asking less questions to get a new project put me in this stage. Thanks so communication is the key for my next. I just want to find soon

[@IAmTimCorey]

I'm glad you are working through it. I'm sorry you had to go through this situation, but I think that the lessons you learn will be valuable in making you a better developer and team member.

[@sdbulbasaur]

@@IAmTimCorey Finally got the offer and back to job again. Thanks for your motivation

[@anthonybeckford5608]

Excellent video

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thank you!

[@santoshkumaryadav4436]

great video 👍🏻

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thanks!

[@runtimmytimer]

Another awesome vid Tim. I despise corporate America. I hate it. I can't stand it. It makes me absolutely miserable. It takes a lot of effort for me to stay in corporate America so your advice is really appreciated. My non-compete expires at the end of the month then I'm hoping to be out in < 2 years. It's gonna be a looooooooong 2 years.

[@runtimmytimer]

@ghost mall Employer+Employee non-competes are generally unenforceable in most states. I sold a business and as the business owner, the non-compete agreement is absolutely enforceable. I doubt those will ever go away. The former should.

[@IAmTimCorey]

I would encourage you to take some time, if you can, and work through what you have gone through. Take some time to acknowledge the issues you are struggling with. If you play professional sports and you strain a ligament in your knee, you can technically push through. It will be painful, debilitating, and it will make every action miserable. You will feel awful and you won't be effective. Instead, if you take the time to rest and recover, you can usually come back with renewed energy and enjoyment. The same is true for software developers. Bad things happen, you get hurt, and it makes the whole system miserable. Taking the time to recover can really help renew your ability to enjoy the industry.

[@runtimmytimer]

@@IAmTimCorey I hear what you're saying Tim, this has been an ongoing thing for me since I graduated college over 25 years ago. I've been self-employed for most of the time since about age 12 or 13 when I started a lawn service business. I sold my tech business in 2018 and was self-employed for the prior 16 years. I left corporate America back then for very specific reasons. Those reasons are still valid today except it's worse now than it was back then. The biggest issue is my BS tolerance is extremely low. I'm a consultant now, which helps since I can distance myself from much of the 💩, but I'm wired to do my own thing.

[@fernandavega5698]

I got fired one month ago, I am a single Mother and I am feeling so insecure about my skills, I am so scare of make the same mistakes once again. My biggest problem is that I am not confident and I always think that I don't deserve to get a better job or succeed in my life. I really need help and change my mind, otherwise I will lose my only change to get a better life for me and my son!

[@IAmTimCorey]

I have some videos that might help: kzbin.info/www/bejne/mGWqq5WQnc94Z6Msi=P4jKh_pdptGY7xrT and kzbin.info/www/bejne/bXi6hHltg9ifb6ssi=RGF6reRDAEdonju6 You can do this. You've got the motivation to push through the hard times. That's a key advantage. One of the biggest causes for people to fail in this industry is that they give up. Push through. You can do it.

[@A_Canadian_In_Poland]

I was fired once from a job in early 2020 on the grounds of being 'too intelligent for the position', and then was interviewed by the local police department about a bomb threat that company received a month later (perpetrator was found three months after that). I was already working another job then. Management expressed their frustrations about all the employees who kept quitting to me on the first week, and seeing an employee list from 2005 with only 3 out of the 40 employees listed still employed with the company then were two red flags that I missed at the time. Ultimately, I was granted a fully-funded PhD offer in Poland near the end of 2020, and caused an unexpected change in life direction.

[@IAmTimCorey]

This sounds like a bad AI-generated story.

[@A_Canadian_In_Poland]

@@IAmTimCorey The job was in an engineering/construction field, not in software. No, it is not AI. It is a true story, but I won't reveal the company or location for obvious reasons. The bomb threat was a different former employee that had worked there years prior. I was oddly questioned by management for having a Master's degree on the second week of the job, despite that being discussed in the interview. Quite oddly (for a fixed salary job), the company used punch clocks in an office environment, and mandated that everyone stayed 40 hours per week regardless of work load, but expected all employees to work unpaid overtime to meet all deadlines, and the deadline policy was clearly communicated to all new hires. Realised later that the company management had low trust in their own employees.

[@hanaachrestia6803]

I was let go from my job even though I was told that my performance was great, but it was due to me not being a great fit and unsatisfactory performance because i missed a meeting and I left early one day because I was sick. I'm upset because this was the best job I've had and I feel hurt and betrayed because my boss was so nice and sweet but I think overall maybe I could have communicated better. I did ask for feedback and candid review on my performance so I can improve on myself, instead they just ignore me now and act like I never exisisted.

[@IAmTimCorey]

That is hard. Unfortunately, there isn't an easy answer. I think you are handling it well, though, reviewing what you can learn for next time and doing your part to try to improve. You can't control how others act or respond. You can only control what you do. Hopefully something even better comes along for you.

[@Bus_em]

17 years experience, & got fired without notice. It's been about 6 months & still feeling apprehensive putting in applications.

[@IAmTimCorey]

I'm sorry. It can be tough, but you can do this. Try not to let someone else's opinion define who you are. They were making a decision (right or wrong) for their company and their situation. They weren't making a judgement about you as a person or as a developer. Even if they thought you were a horrible developer, they thought that in context to what they wanted from you compared to what they felt you gave them. That has no bearing on your actual skills or what you can provide to a different company. I wasn't a great fit at the place I was fired from, which means they felt like I was not a great developer. But I thrived at my next full-time job. They would say that I was an excellent developer. My skills didn't change that much. What changed was the situation I was in. Find the situation that works well for you. You can do it!

[@Richard-jm3um]

Something very important that is related to this, but never heard you talk about is about Solidarity with other developers, and the concept of Unions, our work is important, difficult, and often hard to replace, and Yet! We still don't get treated appropiately, collective action and unionization can change that!!

[@IAmTimCorey]

That's not something that is relevant for most software development positions.

[@Richard-jm3um]

@@IAmTimCorey Quite the contrary, it is relevant to every position, Unionization efforts should reflect both on individual companies and industry wide, the way other industries like the entertainment industry has. It's only lack of will that is an obstacle, you should encourage it!!

[@jasperdeluna7152]

I was made redundant last month. Company was not doing well financially. I walked out amicably and now struggling to find a decent role. Interview process sucks I lost opportunities with some good companies, I always fall over the coding/technical test.

[@IAmTimCorey]

I'm sorry that happened to you. The interview process is hard, especially since it is different for every company. This video might help: kzbin.info/www/bejne/mYLdhWSPd5aWh7c

[@Duelweb]

My experience is the FIOFO syndrome. (Fit in or.......) It's better to work yourself, no surprises. Also the best thing that happened to me, my job satisfaction is awesome now.

[@IAmTimCorey]

I’m glad it works for you. I did it once and had a tough time (stressful). The second time I did it (now) has been amazing. I had to learn some really important lessons to get it right the second time.

[@EaglesQuestions]

I was fired five years ago and I'm still very bitter. It was my first dev position and, to this day, I haven't been able to find another one.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Here is something I've learned from personal experience: you need to work through it. Something bad happened to you. That's unfortunate. Whether it was right or not, it happened and it is over. You can't change it. So now you need to figure out how to move past it. Otherwise, it will always hold you back. Don't give it that power. Work to acknowledge that it happened, that you didn't like it, and that you don't want it to happen again. Then work to identify what you can do to prevent it from happening in the future. Maybe it is asking better questions in the interview. Maybe it is changing your actions at work. Then, let it go.

[@arnotek]

​@@IAmTimCorey I don't know who originally said this, but it is very appropriate. "You can't see where you are going if you keep looking in the rearview mirror." Nothing you do can change the past but the future is up to you - even though it can be VERY difficult.

[@CarrigansGuitarClub]

The one thing, I'd say every developer will face in their working life-time. It's a life learning curve, which tells you that you are only a number and be prepared to jump at any opportunity the old adage "get honest, get educated, get on" will stand by you!.

[@IAmTimCorey]

You aren't always just a number, but it is on you to take care of yourself.

[@CarrigansGuitarClub]

@@IAmTimCorey Unless it's your business or a family business - I'd say you need to keep an eye out on the market.

[@chipkipperly3904]

I got fired from my first corporate job out of college with a start up company. Spent almost a year there and it came out of the blue to be honest. They said it was because I was making too many mistakes but I think there were other things going on as well. A couple weeks before I was terminated the company incorporated new systems which automated a lot of the tasks I was in charge of which was a red flag I should have noticed. Also I was let go right before bonuses were about to be paid out. I think they took advantage of someone who was fresh out of college (which I don’t blame them for, I understand its part of the game) and let me go as soon as I had fulfilled my use to them. But I am still walking away with almost a year’s worth of corporate experience and I have an interview soon with a more established company offering me more pay.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thanks for sharing!

[@user-ih2bu6gi3g]

I really appreciate this video. I was recently dismissed due to bad fit. I have come to accept my part in the dismissal, but now feel as though I've ended my career (>10 years in tech ). Is it normal to feel this way?

[@IAmTimCorey]

Working through the situation and the emotions around it helps. So does getting a new role somewhere and succeeding. You haven't ended your career. Just build up your skills and apply to new places. You can do it.

[@CrimsonQuail]

Hi I am hoping my question can be answered. I am being let go because I was dishonest… I am regretful and sorry about my mistake. How do I convey this in a future job interview? It is something that I have learned from and will never ever do again, but now I am terrified that I won’t ever get hired again. Any advice is welcome

[@IAmTimCorey]

That's a tough one. My recommendation would be to be honest and clear about the situation. You don't need to go into great detail, nor do you need to be clear about the situation. For instance, something like "I was let go from my last job because I had a lapse in judgement. I was dishonest about (fill in the blank). I deeply regret making the wrong choice in this situation and I will not do so again. I realize that my integrity is more important than (being right, protecting my job, or whatever it was you were trying to do)."

[@PerryCodes]

One day at a time.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Keep moving forward.

[@aleksanderdahle1038]

my last positoon as a fullstack trainee has put a curse on me, i did not get a fulltime position after that year, and ive been unemployed since october 2022, ive applied for over 60 positions as fulllstack junio, frontend, backend, but i keep getting rejected BECAUSE of why i did not get a fulltime position at my last job... how the f can i recover form this? i have a very good relationship with my previous employer and there was not a special reason for why i did not get the job. I did my best, but i could not meet there level of expectations. If any one ask me do i wish i could do antyhing different i would say: no, because i did really give everything i had at it.

[@IAmTimCorey]

That doesn't seem to be a curse. It seems to be a blessing. You know what to work on in order to move to the next level. You need to improve your overall C# skills. You know what they expected and you know how you fell short. Start practicing and work to be able to meet that level. That comes from practice and hard work, not from just skills you were born with. Just because you gave it everything you had at the time does not mean that is everything you will ever have. Runners give everything they have in a race, but that doesn't mean that they run the same time each race. Instead, they continue to work and improve.

[@human-ft3wk]

In my opinion you might not be getting the job because of your answer to employers asking you why you didn't get a fulltime position. If you tell them there was no special reason and you have a good relationship with your previous employer they will likely think it's BS, even if it's not. Try to think of things you could've improved and tell them that at the time you were slow in implementing X or lacked Y or Z skill and in between that time and today you have mastered those skills. Try and prove that with some kind of portofolio piece as well. That's just my 2 cents.

[@rosea164]

I was fired unfairly I feel so hurt

[@IAmTimCorey]

I'm sorry.

[@vandeljasonstrypper6734]

We going to have an Uno Platform video ?

[@IAmTimCorey]

Eventually, yes.

[@codefoxtrot]

Imagine being the guy who fired Tim Corey... what an ID10T! They say 'living well' is the best revenge, but really it's being IamTimCorey!

[@IAmTimCorey]

I don’t think of it that way. I wasn’t a fit for what they wanted. I shouldn’t have been there. It was best for both of us that I left. They are better off and I am MUCH better off. It is nice to succeed after something like that, though.

[@veoquenoesunproblema]

@metalhead6604 you know what’s worst, the culture of not saying how much you earn, it is like a taboo that topic between Americans, very weird haha

[@IAmTimCorey]

It is unfortunate. The good news is that in almost every case, talking about your earnings is legally permissible and not something your employer can restrict. So it is on us to talk about it.

[@Richard-jm3um]

Also, very bad advice to be honest in interviews, you always want to at least spin things up a bit

[@IAmTimCorey]

I disagree. If you are dishonest in your interview, it will come out eventually. When it does, your boss is going to question what else you lied about. It is going to break the trust. I've seen it happen. You can definitely guard what you say to put yourself in the best light, but lying is a bad idea.

[@greg1486]

Don't. Just start your own company and let these users rot in hell.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Processing what you are going through is important. Otherwise, you may find it comes back to bite you at the worst time possible.

[@matrixexposer6217]

I am too dumb for software development . I had two jobs. And the last one too difficult. Writing simple console applications is easy. But being confronted with thousands or even millions lines of code is too hard for me. I gave up and I plan to go on welfare here in Germany.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Working with legacy code is hard. Trying to take it all in at once is even harder. Don't let it get you down. This video may help you: kzbin.info/www/bejne/fHbVepl7mZh8fqs

[@maxthecat4632]

I doubt you are too stupid, but you may well need to learn how to break down a large chunk of code into manageable units of functionality that you can digest mentally then focus on how they interact. It's like the old saying, how do you eat an elephant, 1 mouthful at a time. Nobody gets a gigantic solution and knows how it all works but they can know the important bits and go from there.

[@engineeringvision9507]

Nobody is clever enough to understand everything.

[@matrixexposer6217]

Thank you for your supportive answers.

[@MachinesTakingOverTheWorld]

I would love to see Uno videos on this channel.

[@IAmTimCorey]

Thanks for the suggestion. Please add it to the list on the suggestion site so others can vote on it as well: suggestions.iamtimcorey.com/