Communication, respect and trust. Those are the fundamentels in a healhty relationship. The narc lacks all three of them.
@Noangel27 Жыл бұрын
I always thought thank God, peace and quiet. No blah, blah, blah listen to me for four hours. Sometimes I picked one on purpose. Then I could watch tv in peace and talk to the kids about their days. It's a blessing 🎉
@bettycarmella1127 Жыл бұрын
It’s so unnerving too, but I guess that’s the point. Especially when things are going great then suddenly they’re “mad”🤦🏽♀️
@terrapintravels3829 Жыл бұрын
The first time my ex gave me the silent treatment I went into a panic and anxiety attack. I started crying and begged to know why he was treating me like this. Slowly I learned to ignore it and when I ignored him he would ask me what was wrong, he wanted a reaction. I didn't know it was narcissism until I moved out and started researching his behaviors. The insults out of no where as well as silent treatment, and rages had me in what I learned was trauma bond. I moved out a few days after our 1st anniversary which was very painful to do. Leaving caused me to ruminate for a few months which was hellish. All this was 2019 right before covid.
@KB-ih5gf Жыл бұрын
I’m so impressed you found the strength to leave after only one year. I wasted seventeen hoping things would get better 😢
@basicinfo20222 ай бұрын
He did the same to me. In the middle of a text conversation on the night we were supposed to meet, he blocks me on everything. I had no way to reach him and was blindsided. It was a week of emotional torture and pain. He finally unblocked a week later after i messaged from different numbers apologizing. I wish I has never spoke to him after that but I forgot narcissistic traits or was in denial he was one. He didn't even communicate why he blocked me if he was upset by something I said.
@xuemma-pb7ysАй бұрын
@@basicinfo2022my ex often did the same in past years…so i borrowed my friends number tried to ask him why . and he blocked me again and again without telling the conclusion ,even i send him mail to tell that if it meant cut off ,i need my personal stuff back from his place (which was a big amount of money ),he just kept blocking and i had to creat more account … and then he would say i was harassing him and i was not his priority! he pretend that i was haunting him because i could not let him go while the truth was he did not make things clear and he owned me things … he was a devil
@meganbrain8870 Жыл бұрын
Stonewalling and the silent treatment are so damaging especially if they come from nowhere because they're cheating
@KJ-kd5rx Жыл бұрын
This time I've given it right back and moved on. We have a child together and did the whole trying to coparent which turned to parallel parenting, then to him being flaky with trying to keep our child. My child is happier, I'm happier not dealing with his toxicity, and life is so much better. His new supply can deal with the merry-go-round! 😂😂😂
@RRS78999 Жыл бұрын
😂 Awesome!! Same boat. Now I'm learning and healing everything I can to prevent being hoovered back to him or ever ending up with a another narcissist again. It's WAY happier for the kids & I without him and his constant emotional abuse.
@Lo44773 Жыл бұрын
Literally was my life for 3 years there. These folk are actual psychos. You’ll never get through to them. Run for the hills as fast as you can even if it’s agony.
@KB-ih5gf Жыл бұрын
I can’t wait to hear this one… my ex used to deny he ever used the silent treatment on me. He said, “well you pissed me off so obviously I didn’t feel like talking to you, that’s different“ 🤦♀️
@christielawrence4640 Жыл бұрын
Good one, ha.
@christielawrence4640 Жыл бұрын
Hard to believe how obviously lame and just DENSE they can be, instead of so "brilliant"......
@confusedwhynot Жыл бұрын
I gave up talking to him because I felt rejected and alone. Makes you feel like you're the one with the problem. He made our marriage all about sex and would ignore me the rest of the time. He spent over 8 years bashing me behind my back. He would demean me and smirk about it. Mine would speak for me when someone else would address me. He made me feel like I wasn't worth anything and nobody cared.
@christielawrence4640 Жыл бұрын
Clueless that you knew him... poor little jerk. Dust that off you and let him cough in it, now. He was the moron. Prayers up for your return to life!!!
@Cherrylipgloss2025Ай бұрын
The crazy 🤪 thing is it's not something narcissists really want because they can't truly be intimate with another human being but they use sex to get access to your mind and start to control you
@Kat-the-Crohnite Жыл бұрын
When he gave me the silent treatment, I felt like a weight was lifted. I walked away after 10 years.
@markfuller5726 Жыл бұрын
I was thankful for the silent treatment. Leaving became easier because of it.
@robin2319 Жыл бұрын
Use the silent treatment to get out of the relationship and go no contact for good
@PLEX504 Жыл бұрын
My wife is covert and does this often. I just give it right back with no problem. In fact, I've recently just begun to only engage in conversation when she speaks to me. Other than that, I rarely say anything.
@Thankful305 Жыл бұрын
Why don't you just leave or file for divorce??
@PLEX504 Жыл бұрын
@@Thankful305 I'm working on both. It's a very difficult and fragile situation. I've recently lost everything dealing with this madness - including my home. I'm trying to bounce back. I'm also in therapy trying to find a way to separate the person from the personal I was fooled I to believing was real.
@sweetpotato17945 ай бұрын
In the same situation I wish you the best in your journey
@zandig6664 ай бұрын
I just finally walked on one today, were not married and I won't tolerate the silent treatment
@tham1353 Жыл бұрын
I eventually accepted his choice to give me the silent treatment. He gave it that often on and off for years. The last time he did it, I chose to make it a permanent situation for myself and I went no contact. I set about healing myself and concentrating on my own growth, so now I’m grateful for the silence. I’m a better person and I have a happier life, simply because I accepted it.
@Alice-ts3vlАй бұрын
My recommend! When you identify behaviur as toxic silent treatment - be extremely abusive by exposing them completely without any doubts, leave them.with that unexpected true and.block totally!😂😂😂
@JoEliseCo11 ай бұрын
13 years of marriage. I have gotten the silent treatment for most of those 13 years. There have been a few months every other year when things will be ok but it’s never actually been good, that’s just when I give in and pretend. I am so sick of the silence and stonewalling.
@RawMotivations11 ай бұрын
Hope you are doing better these days! Are you able to move forward and start healing???
@arthout Жыл бұрын
Thanks for your clear explanation about ‘silent treatment’.
@marebears626 Жыл бұрын
Wow! This is the video that I needed to watch! Just completed your seven day challenge. Amazing. Thanks for all the videos you put out. They really open your eyes to see that narcissist abuse is real.
@clint1209 ай бұрын
I really appreciate this video. It’s one of the first I’ve heard on understanding the silent treatment. For me, this applies to one particular platonic friendship.. Her silence, her no replies, her ghosting, etc. it’s time for me to quit worrying about a really bad friend, playing games and trying to control. There might be a reason why she’s been married three times.
@RawMotivations9 ай бұрын
Check out a presentation I put together and see if it would help you where you are at: www.rawmotivations.com/breakthrough
@meanimeconingles Жыл бұрын
My father. It's been months since he doesn't speak to me. Living in the same house. I will free myself soon.
@Theinsomniac8266 ай бұрын
Same but my son
@deblawrence2884Ай бұрын
Freedom 🎉
@RawMotivationsАй бұрын
Thank you for your comment , here is the link www.rawmotivations.com/breakthrough
@TKSH6282 ай бұрын
Changing screens is annoying 😂 but I love your content❤
@NewPhone-zn2wy3 ай бұрын
Freedom
@RawMotivations3 ай бұрын
Thank you for your comment, here is the link www.rawmotivations.com/breakthrough
@Cellia836 Жыл бұрын
When I first encountered this and it would bother me so much. As he kept doing this to me. I learned that he is mentally ill and flat out crazy. Now it's like a vacation for me and I have learned how to enjoy it. It's better than being verbally abused by an idiot anymore. I give it right back to him, when he does it to me. I have learned how to treat him the same way he treats me. He hates it! I honestly think it's funny as hell too. I realize that I don't need his validation of me or his approval either. He is a non-factor in my life anymore.
@Rozie326 ай бұрын
I m doing the same, I have blocked him and he blocked me too after that I have unblocked him and he unblocked me after couple of days.. but he doesn’t text me… 😂😂😂 of-course he lied cheated and left me for another woman .. I coughed him ..
@dahliafiend Жыл бұрын
I remember the first time she did jr and had her adult daughter participate in it as well. I honestly thought she was joking. A 46 year old woman! Her love bomb and gaslighting were so profound I can’t believe I stuck around as long as I did. I worked with elementary school children. Most of the fourth graders were more mature than her already.
@MrBoosta5 ай бұрын
I use silence to isolate myself from others that have done wrong (gives me time to think to myself) simply walk away no words need to be spoken sometimes actions are louder than words.
@susanw7924 Жыл бұрын
Dealing with it now after the second Hoover he’s done in a year. We’d been having some issues and after I told him it wasn’t working, he begged and begged to see me. I gave in and went to see him after refusing twice, and he came home drunk, but acting affectionate and pretty normal. The next time, he was cold and told me he was just using me, and now has gone silent. I’m sure he’s moved on to someone else and is punishing me for holding him accountable.
@Ruthforme6 ай бұрын
Thank you so much. This explanation was priceless…
@gooftroopg2623 Жыл бұрын
This is the most empowering video i have seen on KZbin. Thank you
@dianaalyssa8726 Жыл бұрын
I used to do this, not as bad as my narcissist. But have had years of it, there would be word salads or silence.
@gabitanew Жыл бұрын
So , 16 years of so often he gave me the silent treatment, didn’t know that that’s what he is doing, couple day later I apologized without knowing for what, he is now doing it for about 6 weeks after I told him that he won’t get any more sex cause I don’t want it anymore( he discarded me over a year ago but out of fear for his reaction I said yes). I haven’t said a word to him other then what is related to the kids . How long do you think he’ll continue? I started the 7 days challenge, working on myself in his silent time , I don’t mind it anymore cause now I know what it is .
@syrettabassett6440 Жыл бұрын
What I've dealt with the past year on and off and especially worse over past 6 mths
@syrettabassett6440 Жыл бұрын
And we live together
@djw8504 Жыл бұрын
Same but I didn’t move in because he wasn’t a pleasant person and has a drinking problem! Loves sitting at the bar in the same stool if it’s available! Flirting with the young bartenders! I wish I didn’t feel so stupid for begging him to let me know what I did wrong!! 😅🙏💪💛
@thebeardbeastxАй бұрын
Best way to handle it is to go on an adventure away from service or don't check your phone. Flip the script and level up and keep busy😊
@khaledbejdoughJiuJitsu Жыл бұрын
Still going through silence treatment, with a female covert narcissist
@dianaalyssa8726 Жыл бұрын
It was either silence or word salads, he would hardly leave room to talk. I wanted to be polite and listen to him, but maybe that made me too polite.
@DW-bc2gl Жыл бұрын
Me too
@DW-bc2gl Жыл бұрын
Great topic
@bubblesandmilk5 ай бұрын
currently going through this with my partner, just because I told him I would appreciate if he texts me before coming over so I can be ready and would be able to spend more time with him, instead of him coming to my place unnanounced and me being busy. We've been together three years and he's done this at least monthly and each time promises me itll be the last time he does it after he sees me breaking down and going crazy. Im so drained, my self esteem is so low because of this, I feel so stupid, I know he wont change and somehow I cant leave. We even broke up for three months and when I was finally starting to heal he popped back into my life and acted as if he had changed for about two months and now he's back at it stronger than ever. I dont understand how I got myself into this mess, im so angry at myself for letting him have so much power over me
@bubblesandmilk5 ай бұрын
even his friends have tried talking to him and he promises everyone he'll change and then he hurts me again and again and again, I dont understand how someone can be so evil to someone they "love", I wish he would just breakup with me
@RawMotivations5 ай бұрын
I would like to invite you to our free masterclass and learn about the methods to breakfree from toxic relationship. Here www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass
@stephaniekay97934 ай бұрын
I needed to hear the resolution vs control, bitl. So my Q: remains: let them know you are not being subservient before you walk away or just walk amd let them think theyve got you ? I cringe!!!! at that thought
@RawMotivations4 ай бұрын
Appreciate you sharing your story. It must have been really tough. I'd love to invite you to our free masterclass where you can learn how to break free from toxic relationships. Just head over to www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass.
@kalingakrishna270511 ай бұрын
We can do nothing but go through silent treatment, for the reason that all survivors of narcissistic abuse learn about narcissistic abuse very late. The best thing we can ever do is not getting into an other narcissistic friendship, romantic relationship, or business relationship.
@markmartin2292 Жыл бұрын
Five years
@ae7315 Жыл бұрын
Do narcissists alter their behaviour under restrictions? Or if there are any rewards later?
@DW-bc2gl Жыл бұрын
Good question. Yes. Are there rewards later? Gifts, candy out of no where? If they’re upset with you, do they hold their giving bc you did something wrong? Are they intentionally doing these thing? It’s like a game. Good question. Great topic.
@PatriciaThorns19 күн бұрын
My ex would go days without a word to me. Then he would text me from work lol I waited him out to see how long and how many times he passed me in the house without so much as a word ....it hurt like hell yes. But now I'm out he's silent treatment is normal.
@RawMotivations6 күн бұрын
I am Glad you are out. How have you focused on healing? Https://www.rawmotivations.com/survivor
@PatriciaThorns6 күн бұрын
@RawMotivations I'm not healed well. Ruminating is killing me. I pray a lot I guess. Saw him with new supply today and want revenge...
@MrsLittletree6 ай бұрын
The silent treatment can go on even when you are no longer together, especially if you have a child together.
@nicholecornes19155 ай бұрын
I went through the dam pain and broke the trama bond NOTHINGS worth that
@ShannonBlaikie5 ай бұрын
It's a game! If you can? You need to leave at once! Don't give any more thought to it! When the narcissist stops communicating! Know your worth and end it! Go no contact and in 6 to 9 months the narcissist.will resurface! Ignore,ignore and they will disappear hopefully for good! Remember the narcissist. Is only showing up because they want their ego fed!
@NewPhone-zn2wy3 ай бұрын
I done nothing 😢
@RawMotivations3 ай бұрын
We're here to support your healing journey. Come join us in this free masterclass to learn about the secret methods on breaking free from the toxic. Just head over to www.rawmotivations.com/masterclass.
@adrian3747_7 ай бұрын
Tbh i use silent treatment at work to some coworkers because i don’t see them as being friends with me outside work anyways. They’re just a plainly coworkers
@pippipster67672 ай бұрын
But that’s completely different because you have no connection. Silent treatment is abuse when it is in context of a connection and there is no justification or (real) reason for it.
@Southerngrl Жыл бұрын
❤
@nicholecornes19155 ай бұрын
You leave!!!!!!!!
@sunshinestate4001 Жыл бұрын
Enjoy it😂
@Carnage84587 Жыл бұрын
Pretty sure this and the smear campaign are what I'm dealing with because of a girl I hooked up with at work. Long story short, someone told her I apparently had showed our text messages to people, she flipped out on me, hasn't said 1 word to me, made up accusatory lies about me, gives my work credit to other guys in my dept, says "hiiiiii soandso" and ignores me when we are standing right next to each other... what you guys think?
@homework.journal10 ай бұрын
Hey why not talk about keeping your silence when dealing with narcissistic abuse? Or is that also controlling, manipulative and childish behavior too? Let's be clear: silence is only a "treatment" when it's used to deliberately cause someone to hurt. You obviously know this better than most as a "self aware" narcissist yourself. For anyone else out there, don't engage with an abuser again once you understand that's what they are. Soon as you respond on any level you're back in the game and ready to play again, that's how an abuser will view it. Keeping your own counsel is a valid survival tool which also underpins the basis of no contact. Protect yourself
@RawMotivations10 ай бұрын
THanks for sharing this. here's an additional video kzbin.info/www/bejne/fn-knKqQh82AoNEsi=0HAFwGcCUv5dbpQ8
@dianemartinez1148 Жыл бұрын
I have been married to my husband for 30 years he has beaten me he tells me he hates me wishes I would die calls .e ugly nigger and he is always right when I call him out he exoids and tells me it's not and threatens to leave he never takes responsibility responsibility responsibility for bhis actions and never apologize for the awful things things he says to me I don't k o Don't know what to do😢