How grief feels | Robbie Stamp | TEDxLondon

Robbie talks movingly about the experience of grief, how it changes our perception of the world and how we can all support those who are grieving.
Robbie Stamp is Chairman of Bioss International, a consultancy interested in decision making and human judgement particularly in relation to machine learning and AI. Way back when in 1995, Robbie was a Founder of The Digital Village with the late great Douglas Adams, author of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. The Company created the Computer Game Starship Titanic and h2g2.com, the real “earth edition” of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, which was sold to the BBC and subsequently bought back. So Robbie is now Chairman of Not Panicking Ltd, which owns the digital rights to the earth edition and is imagining a new future for “The Guide”.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

[@worldbridgeldn1162]

Everyone is telling me to be stronger when all I want to do is cry my heart out until I collapse.

[@robbiestamp8454]

I guess my talk was about letting the grief overwhelm and certainly not to fight the overwhelm on anybody else's behalf. I am intrigued by why "other" people want others to be strong? I'm still not sure I understand it really but as I finish my talk by saying , if you want to howl, howl.

[@kimthrower4056]

I lost my wife 2 years ago. My life has changed so much. Coming home to an empty house without any greeting or smile of my lovely wife, tears me apart and I cannot come to terms with it. I miss her so very much. Her tenderness and loving ways always bring me to tears when I think of her. She was so young (57) and had everything to live for. But a massive bleed on the brain put an end to the lovely life that we shared together. She had had 2 strokes before, but her determination to live always helped her to overcome her health problems. I cared for her during her struggles and was always there for her during her trials and love for each other always got us through her ordeals. Yet loss was always around the corner and looking at the last anniversary card that she gave to me, she somehow knew that we would not be together in this earthly life. I love and respect her tremendously and her determination to carry on, despite what she really knew in her mind, has increased my love for her, if that was indeed possible. My Darling wife has gone and I am left with memories of our love and life together. That is better than nothing, but I would give anything to be able to hold her in my arms just one more time and tell her just how much I love her.

[@davidrodriguez-by5qk]

God Bless you...

[@bikinivice5365]

My feelings and story is so very similar to yours it’s chilling. I hope you’re doing well. I absolutely understand and feel every word you wrote. My husband passed not even two months ago and the pain, panic, emptiness and frustration is unbearable.

[@savannahleeross7373]

My dear sir, my heart aches in agony with you, I too have loved and lost. Everyone I love and was closest with is now gone... I cared for, and watched them all take their last breath. Life is so sad, tragic, and lonely. I pray you find the will to go on, to be with her again one day.... Know that you are not alone, I too am just as destroyed, and in so much pain most days seem so endless and daunting. But I know, when I walk through those pearly gates, my love, my baby, my parents, everyone will be there to embrace me with everlasting love 💕. That is the only thought and dream that gets me through each day. God Bless you.

[@JM-wn1gr]

I know what you’re going through. I’m so sorry for your loss you sound like an incredible person. I hope things look brighter for you each day that passes and I wish you many blessings in the days to come.

[@carmendaniel3734]

I'm so sorry about your loss. I lost my only daughter to suicide. I can't and wouldn't want to go on without her. There is nothing to live for. She was all I had. Her love gave me motivation and hope. She is the love of my life. I just want to be in the afterlife with her. She is all that matters. Being with her is all that matters to me. The daily pain is unbearable for me. I can't live without my Paige with me. Her smile and silliness. I can't go on without that. There is no coping.

[@dordil]

Two steps forward and one step back that's how I am after 3 years. Grief sucked the life out of me the day my husband died.

[@jimmiepatrum]

How are you now, Dorothy Doorasamy? My own husband of nearly 54 years died 27 months ago in a sudden accident - no time to tell him goodbye. Some days I am okay; some days I am not. The happiness we shared together will never be again - I know that. But I do wonder if someone who is a year ahead of me in her grief is finding life any easier. Diane in NC

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Dorothy - you may never see this but if you do then I hope that maybe four years on from your husband's death there are days when the presence of his absence is a little less brutal for you.

[@paulcarr4099]

It's been 14 months since my wife passed away and it still feels like yesterday. I no what you mean when you say two steps forward one back. I am so tired of people telling me that I need to get over it and get on with my life. The thing is it is not the easy. I feel like I am on a roller coaster up and down

[@brendadrumm9708]

Spot on I lost my daughter a few yrs ago yr half after my son died she was 42 he was 32 there is nothing on earth can make me feel any better time has taught me this a constant struggle time don't heal when your a mum too many memories

[@donnadavis5544]

YES!!! TWO steps forward 1 step back. Ive actually said just this. Each day I almost have to propell myself up and onward. I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my only child Ben 34. 21 months ago the light of my life choose to leave this world.

[@pyromaniac12345]

Overcoming grief isn't about being ok, it's about being at peace with what happened. Losing someone close or almost losing someone you're close to changes you permanently, can't really describe it.

[@dianekelly8525]

It does change you. I understand what you mean. The joy in life is tainted.

[@angellakirabo5275]

Surely, my friends say that I take heart but not easy, my only son disappearance has tortured me mentally and physically

[@donnadavis5544]

I absolutely love this reply. " it's about being at PEACE WITH WHAT HAPPENED " I will never be ok or the same. I am broken. But 21 months after losing my only child Ben 34 I can in all honesty say I'm happy he left when he did. Its hard on us but he is at peace. I try to not be selfish and I try to release him.

[@lyuanaaustin6769]

Tomorrow will be 5 months since my father passed in my heart is still broken. It seems likepeople think you're okay because they see you functioning your day-to-day routines, but they don't understand how hard it is to get through each moment of each day. Thank you for writing this and sharing! It is perfect!

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Lyuana - i doubt you will check back here but I hope that there has been some times when the pain has eased.

[@lyuanaaustin6769]

@@robbiestamp8454 Thank you for your kind words. The timing of your message is perfect because it was this time 2 years ago when I made a special trip just to visit him not knowing it would be the last time I would see my father alive. Yes I've been able to laugh and smile when thinking of my father. I've actually found comfort in going to the lake because we spent a lot of time when I was younger. I really didn't miss him, but with time the pain has become more bearable. Be blessed 🕊️🙂

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@lyuanaaustin6769 - I am very glad to hear that the pain has become more bearable and that when the sea is stormy maybe it blows just a little less long and hard too.

[@MrHartApart]

35 days for me... day by day, step by step. This pain is now with us for the rest of our lives. That means we loved them.

[@shirleysarradet9486]

Today is exactly 10 months since my husband died. Paul and I were married for 68 years. There are no words, it can not be told, how much I miss Paul. Everything in my whole world hurts. My body, my memory, my brain, my heart. I am very old. I Need him so very much. I pray for all who are grieving now. Thanks for the beautiful talk.

[@adamdarby43]

Lost both my mom and dad only a few days ago. This video resonates with me. I feel lost and alone in a cold dark world

[@stepht5436]

Time heals, even in the slightest. Scars will remain but living will seem possible again. I hope you are finding your peace. Much love to you.

[@GiGi-fd6om]

I'm so sorry. That is so horrible. I see you wrote this 4 months ago. How are you today? Do you have a support system? It does not surprise me that you feel lost and alone. I can relate. I never had a father, but my mother died unexpectedly when I was 19 and I it was all I could do to get through the day. I was never the same. It changed me forever.

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Adam, on this journey.

[@carlosacta8726]

I too am grieving Adam. May you find light and strength! I lost my wife a week ago.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Adam, Steph, Wade and Carlos, as you face anniversaries and the passage of time, I hope you are all finding some better days.

[@willdonoghue9389]

To all those who are grieving a Loved one I wish you peace and Love

[@karamccarthy9058]

He hits on everything. In had to bury my 21 year old beautiful daughter a year ago. My best friend in the whole world. It was just her and I. Her father left me years ago. Oh he tried to be involved as much as he could, but she was mine and mine alone. I equate my loss to losing a daughter, a parent, a sibling, and a best friend all at once. The pain is excruciating. And I have no idea what each day will bring me. God bless us all who have to experience this pain. A pain I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Oh Kara, this is so sad to read. Thank you for posting here and I am so sorry that you are going through this pain. It is as you say, so brutal, and judging by when you wrote this, still so recent, so I fear that the pain will still be very intense. There will be moments one day but my heart goes out to you, it really does.

[@Putchki]

Crying so hard, want my husband back so badly 😭

[@drewgrey3494]

I know where you are. I lost my husband also. we are in a club that nobody should ever be a part of. I have never known a pain like this.

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Lily, on this journey.

[@fitmis50]

Lily hugs to you and all here who have lost a loved one. I just lost my husband two months ago. I feel the same as you. I still cannot believe it. Tears streaming down my face.

[@cullbill]

I’m so so sorry. My heart hurts do r you. I just lost my father and the pain feels like its killing me.

[@sherryrodrigo5457]

I need my husband so bad. I lost him 3 months ago. The pain iam in is so bad. How long am i supposed to go on.? I just wish I could be with him. He was my evening Iam so heart broken.

[@steveclark1303]

I too don't avoid the sadness and tears as its when I feel connected that the grief is strongest, as thats they deserve, its me sharing my love in their absence.

[@robbiestamp8454]

i think it is indeed one of those often un recognised elements of grief is just how vivid a connection that pain still is.

[@happysheepboys1935]

I've recently lost my husband who was my best friend. I've been searching for support as I feel completely lost. This, was the speech I needed to hear. It is everything that I am feeling. And most importantly, I now know I am no longer alone in these feelings. It made sense to me to hear this. Thank you, for this.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Hello - i am sorry not to have responded sooner - you must still very much be in the storm. Am thinking of you and hoping that there are some moments of respite

[@valentina-th9hm]

I love you mom. I still miss you 💔

[@danielbiggs6085]

I've been reading through all the comments and noticed nobody had responded to yours... I lost my mum on Friday she had covid... just thought I'd ask how you are today?❤

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Valentina, I am trying today to respond to everybody who has posted here and I although I do now know if you will ever see this, I wanted to say that I am sorry to read about the death of your mother. And looking at when you posted this must all be so recent. The only thing I can offer, is that when those fleeting moments of respite do find you, your Mom will be glad of them for you..

[@valerieminster1626]

Everything he said is true. I would give anything to have my daughter back. I pray all the time and I get some relief. But it comes back. It is just so hard.

[@jacquelinestewart3820]

Hi I lost my daughter in November all I want is to see her again it’s all I think about being reunited with her I’m so sorry for your pain and loss

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Valerie, I do not know if you will ever see this but I wanted to say how sorry I am to hear that your daughter died and so recently. There is not really a scale of grief but I know that nobody should ever have to bury a child. There are moments when words really do fail..

[@karenmartin3289]

Hi Valerie. I share your pain. Every morning when I open my eyes, my pain starts anew. I would give Anything to have my daughter back. She is only 11 yrs old.

[@angellakirabo5275]

Me too, a thousands tears I knew couldn't bring my son bk bt I tried

[@RayaxMaxine]

Watching this almost every night before I sleep. It will be one year since my mama passed. It truly is a wave.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Maria, I hope there have been the moments of respite too that your Mama would have wanted - those moments where her love still cradles you in peace. And I hope that you do manage to sleep too.

[@caroleschachinger2593]

Thank you Robbie, for describing the feelings of grief so very well. After 51 years together, my beloved husband died 3 weeks ago. He was my life, my light, my everything... the most rare and precious blessing that God ever gave me. Thank you for mentioning those of us who are undignified grievers. It is not something I chose to be, and I so admire those who can be dignified at a time like this. Of all the husband's in the world, God gave me the very best, and the grief of his loss is devastating and overwhelming. May God bless and comfort all who are going through their own grief journeys.

[@5MinutePsychology]

Everyone goes through grief their own way. Some are angry, others sad, someone else can be depressed or scared. But one day or another each of us will have to face this traumatic experience. If this happens to you know this: you are not in this alone. No matter how hard it is now, it will eventually be better. Maybe not today, not tomorrow...maybe not next week, but it will eventually get easier. To go through it, find your own relaxation technique and the best for you breathing exercise, be with people who love you. Be strong and be safe.

[@pupskin123]

Spot on and moving. I'm grieving too. Thoughts with others out there struggling too x

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Sharon, on this journey.

[@MC-cg2rr]

Excellent video... Thoughts to you too my grieving friend. Big time

[@carlosacta8726]

I too am grieving Sharon. May you find light and strength!

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Sharon, I know it is unlikely that you will ever see this but wanted to say hello and wonder how you are now

[@roberttopal5128]

Me (Otessa) widow of my husband (Robert), I lost him on 07 September 2022. When his heart stopped beating, my heart stopped beating along with his. I connect everything to him. My husband was a man of integrity.

[@drewgrey3494]

I have been in the waves for 4 years....he could not have said it any better.

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Drew, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Drew, I hope you see this and hope that there has just been a little more time spend out of the storm these past two years

[@robbiestamp8454]

I'd like to thank people for their comments below and would hope for each and every one of you that the moments of respite have grown just a little longer,

[@hjtres7261]

I found a great amount of peace listening to this. Just to know it can be described what I feel every day. Thank you.

[@janbowles2449]

I lost my soul mate of sudden death syndrome 3 months ago. He was just taken. This is only thing I have read that helps. My thoughts to everyone in same boat as me Jan

[@robbiestamp8454]

Jan Bowles I’m so sorry to hear that. I wish you moments of respite that one day become minutes. These are strange days to be with the mystery of absence and presence.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@hjtres7261 I am glad and hope that a year on, you have found some moments of respite

[@hjtres7261]

@@robbiestamp8454 yes, I have. Your words have helped so much. Thank you, I send love and good vibes to you 💜

[@lizzalkula376]

I've been comparing it to jumping into a body of water that you know nothing about. It may be freezing and take your breath away; have huge waves and a strong undertow, it may be shallow or so deep there's no bottom. I hope each of you with your loses get your bridges or get to lay on calm waters. Peace to your hearts. (Rest well Nick. My dear friend. I miss you.)

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Lizz, that is a very powerful and beautiful extension of the images - especially the undertow. I was contacted recently by a young man whose friend had committed suicide and wanted to animate some of the words... I write poetry and with your permission might well one day include that thought.

[@lizzalkula376]

@@robbiestamp8454 thank you. Very much. You are more than welcome to use it. And if it were to become animated I would love to see it.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@lizzalkula376 you are very kind and I will be sure to post here if and when the remarkable young man who contacted me about the suicide of his friend does animate what he called "the poem"

[@srhaven]

The moments are respite are a relief, but then you panic because it feels like you are losing the connections with your person. Then you are back in the waves and you remember them and feel their loss. It s hard to decide which is worse.

[@robbiestamp8454]

I think that this is one of the hardest and maybe least acknowledged parts of grief that the pain can come to be the most vivid form or connection and that the moments of respite induce grief. The one thing I would offer, and I am certain about few things in life, that the person who died and loved you, would want those moments of respite for you, they really would.

[@RobertBrown-mm3un]

I'm almost 9 weeks in... My partner died in his sleep, suddenly, cannot figure out how... Deep grieving, working in persistence to transmute into gratitude... Best to you all!!! ☮

[@RayaxMaxine]

My mother passed away 17 days ago. She died of covid. I am so heartbroken that I was not by her side during her final moments. There’s a lot of things I was not able to say. There is no proper goodbye.

[@BoobTube305]

I lost my husband to stage 4 Pancreatic cancer a little over a year ago...I was a newlywed and a widow in 3 short days. We never saw it coming and bless his heart.. he never had a chance. Michael passed less than a week if being diagnosed. Ive heard hundreds describe grief .. and as individual as the process can be.. this describes best what its been like for me. Thank you 🙏🏻

[@ChrisJohnson-lh9qb]

Hello miss, I'm sorry about your loss, trust me I completely understand your pains, I've had a great deal of lost in the past, I'm a single Dad with a daughter, I lost my wife 5yrs ago and I don't understand it, grief hit's different and every one sees things differently, I felt devastated and I still feel the empty space in my heart, I understand how you feel but life goes on because death is inevitable and we'll all have to face it someday, it's been quite a while and I hope you doing fine ? time they say is the best healer and I now understand it, it'd be nice to have a chat with you or maybe a great conversation if you don't mind sending me your gmail address so i could reach out on you ?.

[@marynolan3471]

God bless you with the best of good caring people around. Do it your way. Grief is the hardest thing ever. Be kind to yourself. It is so so sad what you have to deal with, loosing your husband so quickly. God bless you on your journey 👏🙌❤️💐

[@BoobTube305]

@@marynolan3471 Thank you so much for your kind words… God bless you and yours ❤️

[@maladutt35]

This if the best tedx talk on grief. Both of my parents passed away from covid nine days apart two years ago and I listened to this talk many times. I would this talk with family friends because it can get awkward as to what to say to someone who is grieving.

[@inafduller]

Pain is the connection. That is so true for me. I lost mym a few weeks ago and I can't let go. Not just yet. And I keep hanging on even if it's painful because it connects me to my mom.

[@arseniowonga]

My mum died in 2000 when I was 24, and It made my depression That I've had since childhood so bad, I am now 41 with permanent depression and have been feeling dead inside all these years, I don't have real freinds or anyone who loves me..this is the real life people don't wanna hear, because they grew up "NORMAL". Anyone who feels they are alone in their suffering, ur not, I'm just like u, I know coz I'm in that dark labyrinth called "The mind" where nothing makes sense even to this day...Hope God Loves Me, I'm A Good Man..🙁

[@adamdarby43]

Lost both my mom and dad in violent car crash just days ago. I too suffer from depression all my life. My mom and dad were my life support, my only fans. The would seems so dark and scary now. Now when I have a depression attack I can't call them. My mom used to call me twice a day to tell me she loved me and believed in me. I feel dead inside

[@drewgrey3494]

@@adamdarby43 Checking on you, I know that it has been a month ago since you wrote. I understand the panic, the fear of the unknown, the worry over what life holds. I have been there. It is the smallest steps that have kept me walking. i hope you are okay. I am so terribly sorry for your loss. I will say a prayer for you and hope you will write me back so I know that you are okay.

[@louisokeefe8307]

God loves you Arsenio you will be rewarded keep your faith....

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Arsenio, on this journey.

[@joannenascimento9213]

Hi Arsenio.I see this as so long ago.I too am going through depression and loss,ALL ALONE. Please reach out to me.I am struggling awfully.

[@purbitadatta]

He really nails the emotions that come with grief... The ups and downs... The daily struggles and the need for patient listeners

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Purbita, you may never see this but I hope that there are maybe just a few moments of respite for you, though if you lost someone only a few months ago I fear that the storm will still be raging.

[@thedigitalemotion]

I'm 44 and its 9 months since I lost my Dad. I can tell you that all the things this guy says are true. I am doing ok, but its very hard. I felt as if I lost my safety net, my business partner, a guy who was smart, a guy who gave the right advise just in the knick of time before I made a mistake. I feel like I am totally lost without him, yet a couple of months before he died he said how very proud of me he was taking over the things he couldn't do anymore. I'll always carry that with me. I feel he is watching the world through my eyes now, he lives inside my mind & heart, so I speak to him when I'm alone. If any of you are going through this, you have my absolute sympathy. I miss you Dad xx

[@robbiestamp8454]

I wonder if you will ever see this, but thank you for posting here and I am so sorry to hear about your father. I am glad that you have those words of pride from your father to carry in your heart for always. In amidst the pain the one thing as a father I know too, I would wish my son respite..

[@thedigitalemotion]

@@robbiestamp8454 Thank you so much for your reply Robbie. Your words and certainly this video helps a huge amount. Im so glad you did this talk. All the very best.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@thedigitalemotion - thank you for responding today too. May your father's pride in you continue to sustain you in those stormier hours and days.

[@lewashcliffe]

Thank you, Robbie Stamp, for this beautiful and heart-warming presentation. I lost my beautiful wife of 38 years to cancer last year, and every day feels exactly as you described. It gets better, little by little, but I will never get over her loss from my life.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Lewis, i doubt you will see my response but I wanted to say thank you for taking the time to post here and I am so sorry tot hear about your wife. Thirty Eight years is a long time to be married and this is so recent for you, I hope that there are some minutes that are easier for you.

[@mkf628]

Grief is not an 'emotion'. It's an all-encompassing amplification of everything we are; physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, both the good and the bad. It's turbulent, menacing, disorientating and confusing. It's like having the rug pulled out from under you with no solid surface to tread on. You navigate it without a map or a compass. You realise it doesn't end. It morphs and changes, like the sand under the ocean. But it's always there, because the one you grieve for is always there. It's just a part of you. It is life itself, manifesting in it's brutality and it's beauty, all in one.

[@stephaniecanty1900]

This is me right now, my husband passed away on January 6, 2020. My heart is broken and my mind can't wrap around how we were talking one minute and the next minute he was gone. This man hit the nail right in the wall. Thank you so much keep me in your prayers. I deep in the water it's only been 2 months this is the longest he's been gone from me

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Stephanie, in these strange days, how are you faring?

[@abookiew]

I thought your video was excellent and absolutely spot on, thankyou. I lost my son age 22 just 3 months ago and am still in disbelief, two weeks before he would have graduated. He was my everything, an amazing young man and my best friend i don't know how i live the rest of my life. I like your description of the rock eventually becoming bigger and spending more time on there as it gave me hope from this constant anguish and despair. My thoughts and love are with everyone who has lost someone they love.

[@robbiestamp8454]

i am so sorry to hear about the death of your son. As I have posted elsewhere, there is no hierarchy of grief but the death of a child is not the natural order of things. There is a piece of music by Eric Whitacre "When David Heard" that is very very powerful and in the absolute rawness of the music there is a strange universal peace too. I hold you in my heart.

[@radiantbird]

My son 23, drowned whilst I was in the pool with him. The trauma of pulling him out and found cpr, calling paramedics … nothing… gone in 2 minutes… his banana nut muffins were still on the kitchen counter.. we were supposed to go for a swim and come home for a movie. That was 6 months ago. Most days I don’t want to live anymore . I’m so tired of the fear and anguish and heartbreak. He was my everything, my life, my beautiful only son and he was ripped out of my life .

[@jelena1970]

Thank you for this. It is the best description of grief I heard. I lost a lot in my life. War. In Sarajevo. My father to cancer. Many family members. Nothing can compare this. I lost my husband, heart attack, at 51, ran marathons, they refused to take him to hospital because of COVID19. In Geneva. 1st April 2020. I was resuscitating him for 20 min, ambulance came. It was too late.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Oh Jelena, I don't know if you will ever see this but I am so sorry to hear just how much death you have had to cope with and how hard those final minutes with your husband must have been. Looking at when you posted this is all still so recent so I fear that the pain has not lessened. Nevertheless if there are fleeting moments of respite I know that your husband would wish them so...

[@jelena1970]

@@robbiestamp8454 Dear Robbie. Thank you for this note. It means a lot. Today is one year after Philippe passed away. He is in St. Georges cemetery in Geneva. I have never seen someone describing so well the grief like you did, it feels exactly like that to the last inch in your body. One year after, I think I cry less, but you live with it. It is always there. They say in 'Vivrei nel cuore di chi ti ama' - you live in the heart of those who love you. Snoopy said looking at the starts in the sky with Charlie Brown 'Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loves ones shine down to let us know they are happy'. I am living on auto-pilot, I think this happens to people, along with actual physical pain we feel for months and months. But Philippe is in everything. The sadness is deep. It is different from depression and things. Grief is different. It is always there in everything. Thank you for this beautiful video. It feels like you share grief with someone who can really understand you. Who feels what you feel. Take care.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@jelena1970 - well I know just how poignant anniversaries are. You mention Snoopy and Charlie Brown - my son gave me the entire collected works of Schulz for my 60th birthday last year and I am finding immense pleasure in reading each volume. I think he was one of the great geniuses of the 20th Century. The death of Philippe is still so recent and maybe today of all days, you have found some small ritual that has both brought both pain and some tiny moment of respite. He would wish that for you, he really would. It is kind of you to have replied today. Big Hug Robbie

[@ChrisJohnson-lh9qb]

@@jelena1970 Hello miss, I'm sorry about your loss, trust me I completely understand your pains, I've had a great deal of lost in the past, I'm a single Dad with a daughter, I lost my wife 5yrs ago and I don't understand it, grief hit's different and every one sees things differently, I felt devastated and I still feel the empty space in my heart, I understand how you feel but life goes on because death is inevitable and we'll all have to face it someday, it's been quite a while and I hope you doing fine ? time they say is the best healer and I now understand it, it'd be nice to have a chat with you or maybe a great conversation if you don't mind sending me your gmail address so i could reach out on you ?.

[@TheEarthboundfairy]

I hope you are coping with this, mustering whatever strength is left in your heart. I am too. My darling Mother passed away from a cardiac arrest just two months ago. It was so sudden and unespected. Even though I was with her to the last moment, she passed away on the way to the hospital when the attack came. I let myself be punished by the guilt and self-blaming for all the things I could have, should have, may have done. The world has stopped for me now too. I do not know how to live like I did again. She is in my heart and mind, every second and every moment. Love her sooo much !

[@dianekelly8525]

Thank you! I lost three people I love dearly 2020. My father in January 2020,: my brother in March 2020 and the most painful of all, my beautiful daughter Sarah. She was only 31. I did howl and i was and am at times undignified. I appreciate the words in this talk so much.

[@almightykitty]

Diane, I can't even imagine. You just keep waking up, and doing the next thing. I really believe in the afterlife. They are all doing good and watching from above. Just one foot in front of the other. xo

[@dianekelly8525]

@@almightykitty thank you. 💜

[@dianekelly8525]

@@almightykitty thank you so much. 💜💜💜

[@dianekelly8525]

@@almightykitty thank you. You are a beautiful soul. 💜💜💜

[@geoffunwin196]

My wife Judy died 12th July 2022 - we had been together for 64 years. We had no illusions of yet another life etc. and knew this was it until the end. I am so painfully aware of the reality of life and inevitable death - my love and respect those of to you who feel the same.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Geoff - thank you for posting here and I am so sorry to hear of your wife's death. 64 years is longer than I have been alive (just) - what a beautiful way to have lived a life in a union across so many decades..

[@nwadi6408]

My father passed away 14 days ago. I miss him so much. Grief is a path of thorns.

[@robbiestamp8454]

I am so sorry to hear that - grief is indeed brutal. Only a month ago so I imagine you are still in such pain and shock. I hope though that there are some tiny moments of respite for you.

[@gordonturnbull7916]

Grief is the price of love. Your dad is always with you. At your side. Talk to him. Your love for him and his love for you.... death has no power over that. My friend

[@MrHartApart]

@@gordonturnbull7916 This one. I lost my father/best friend 35 days ago and I am still talking out loud to him, imagining his responses. Talk to him whenever you want, even if it's grocery shopping.

[@peterfortune2397]

My 32 year old son died suddenly in January 2021. Miss him so much.

[@estherflasher5576]

An accident took my 31 year old son, he just didn't come home! I have stopped talking about it my family hasn't asked, that was last Oct.

[@paulrobinson3297]

My son died suddenly whilst climbing a couple of months ago. Your description and metaphor using the sea and those brief moments of refuge as we cling to a rock is so how I have described this terrible feeling too. Brief moments above the water before the next awful storm surge sweeps me back under the waves. Thank you for your words and insight. They give me the hope and energy to keep my head above the water.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Paul, oh I am so sorry to hear that and I hope that you have been able to find a few hours , when you have been able to keep your head above water or even been able to spend some time on the islands where there is some respite

[@krystalball26]

I lost my mom suddenly 2 weeks ago, we were so close and she was still so young. She was my biggest support with my children. She lit up a room with love and laughter. She cooked like a real Italian mom should. Amazing. I don’t understand how anyone gets through this. I love and miss her so much. This talk was spot on. Thank you.

[@Hank8841]

I'm so sorry. You and your Mom are forever joined by your folks' love. You folks are still together. I lost my Mom when I was 14, I'm 50 now. I promise you will know the feeling of true joy and happiness again.

[@robbiestamp8454]

I am so sorry to hear about your Mom and by the sounds of things that there was no time to prepare. I am responding when it is still all so recent for you - my heart goes out to you.

[@shortyd2404]

I too lost my my momma ( 08-29-22) suddenly and so young. It is an unimaginable pain and grief has changed me. So sorry for your loss.

[@erinthomas5392]

I have listened to this video countless times since losing my mom in 2020 and then my dad in 2022. This message gave me hope when I could barely breathe, and it still gives me hope when an unexpected wave crashes.

[@GoCoogs98]

Thank you, this is one of the best things I've viewed on grief. I lost my mom about 3.5 weeks ago and his descriptions were spot-on for me.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Mark, I doubt you will ever see this but I have been moved recently for various reasons to come and read all the comments and am so humbled by them and so am trying to reply to everybody. Your loss is so recent that I imagine that the pain is still very intense. I wish you some respite and know that your mother would wish that for you too.

[@GoCoogs98]

@@robbiestamp8454 Thank you!! So kind of you to respond!!

[@robbiestamp8454]

​ @Mark Anderson - it has been a very humbling day and I wish you those moments of joy in birdsong in the evening again.

[@annmarieknapp]

This captures how I've felt perfectly. My mother died close to 5 years ago and it still haunts me. This is comforting and eloquent.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Annamarie - i have been back to see the comments here and feel that I should have responded to everybody a long time ago. How are things for you in these strange days?

[@spiritualelement757]

I haven’t lost anyone well not anyone I’m close to at least and this made bawl my eyes out. I am so sorry for those that had to go through this. Grief is a horrible emotion I haven’t experienced like you guys but I know it’s horrible. I described it as a feeling where life feels constricting as you’re desperate to see them again and escape the pain. I give you all love and support 😭🥰 💗

[@fitmis50]

Thank you Robbie for this. My husband just died and your talk made me cry. You have been therapy for me. Thank you for reaching out to us all who are grieving and helping. hugs to you

[@robbiestamp8454]

Hello - I wonder how things are for you now, still in so many ways still so recent..

[@ChrisJohnson-lh9qb]

Hello miss, I'm sorry about your loss, trust me I completely understand your pains, I've had a great deal of lost in the past, I'm a single Dad with a daughter, I lost my wife 5yrs ago and I don't understand it, grief hit's different and every one sees things differently, I felt devastated and I still feel the empty space in my heart, I understand how you feel but life goes on because death is inevitable and we'll all have to face it someday, it's been quite a while and I hope you doing fine ? time they say is the best healer and I now understand it, it'd be nice to have a chat with you or maybe a great conversation if you don't mind sending me your gmail address so i could reach out on you ?.

[@pamelarudd8684]

My moments of silence are "more silent" right now . . . My Mama's passing, that is now nearing 3 weeks ago . . . seems as if it is something imaginary to me. She took GOD'S hand and started her new journey silently and at ease, while I was the only one in the house and in the room with her . . . I did not know the exact moment she stopped breathing nor did I get to say good-bye. My heart is very broken and the waves are very high right now! I have the memories and the pictures, but her voice and her presence will have to come when I can begin to dream again and see her there 😔.

[@gerardkinsella6034]

Truly broken hearted 1 year over a deep loss pain in heart morning noon and night since mental health all over the shop at the mo personally I don’t think you’ll ever be right when you go through grief prayers for anyone that’s going through it🙏

[@lillyg123]

“Hows things today?” I miss you mom .

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Lise, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@wgreenlee - you may never see this, but I wonder how things are for your days now

[@wgreenlee]

@@robbiestamp8454 Thank you for asking, Robbie. Every day I am constantly reminded of everything I miss about my son and everything that I will miss, as well. I learned a long time ago after visiting a grief counselor that I will just have to be "ok about not being ok." It's such a long, hard journey. Of course, I have learned to smile and laugh again in those spontaneous moments, but Brooks being my only son, and being murdered, seems to continually knock me back. I have learned much through much loss, and I am a better man today. I listen to others with an open heart about their problems, and I am more empathetic and compassionate, so that keeps me going. There is constant drive to have my son be proud of me through all of this, even though he's not here to voice it. Our relationship was extremely close and I just can't find that joy anymore. But...I am still here and I am still pushing forward, and I believe I have helped others on their own grief journey, so I don't want to "go away" anymore and that is a big accomplishment. Thank you again for your compassion and work. Peace and love to you.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@wgreenlee what a profound thought that is about your son being proud of you. I am so sorry to hear that he was murdered. Each loss has its unique qualities of pain but that must certainly have brought many additional dimensions with which you have to cope. My heart really does go out to you.

[@arunnbhaardwaj8680]

Lost my dad in May, when we thought he is recovering, no words said, even he never would have thought....can't, will never forgive myself for not doing enough, i do not wish this pain to go away, i am happy to live with this pain and his thoughts, he is always on my mind, his voice, his manners....Love You Papa ! Thanks for sharing this.....much appreciated.

[@qeytmyok2473]

Even I feel I could gave done more for my mom..

[@victorianathanson1986]

Thank you for your talk. You describe so well how grief feels. How those moments of deepest grief are also an extraordinary connection to the one who has died. I miss my husband every single day but feel he is with me in the gentle breeze that dries my tears.

[@kurtfrancis1524]

I lost my spouse of 41 great years. She and I had truly "become one" in marriage and her loss feels like half of me died as well. Feeling happy has been frightening in that I feel like the connection is diminishing. This wonderful speaker understands this so well.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Victoria, what a beautiful image that - a gently breeze and your tears

[@childoflight3388]

I couldn't have described my grief any better. This was beautiful and something I can send to those closest to me as a reference. Thank you for this!

[@robbiestamp8454]

I am not sure if you will ever read this but I have wanted in these strange days to respond to everybody who took the trouble to respond here and to say that I hope that you have found some moments of respite, although still all so recent for you.

[@Zaphran-qv5jy]

Embracing your emotions is probably the best thing you can do. Weather you are happy or grieving let it come. Don't fight pain. It will only make the pain worse when it finally washes you over. I lost my dad in Jan of 22 to the nefarious Covid-19 and my life has never been the same again. I concur with everyone's feelings in the comments. I flow with my emotions each day. More grief then anything else honestly but I let it come. Prayers for everyone here who has lost someone and just know that they are all watching over us and smiling and thankful that we loved them dearly.🙏

[@robbiestamp8454]

I hope that maybe there have been one or two moments where you have been able to be in a place of calm with the memory of your father. Moments when a memory of times together - ordinary ones or maybe a unique moment of some kind - brought some respite.

[@reflectionOfLyf]

I have read somewhere, grief is the love that we have but cannot give to someone. I have been grieving for 8 years after my fathers death.

[@judylandis9204]

My mamma,Oct 7,2020, 97yr. I miss her.

[@ricardolopez800]

Extraordinary description of grief. Thank you Robbie. My mom passed away 1 year and two days ago. I miss her very much.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Ricardo, you have been through a few anniversaries now and I hope that there have been times of respite for you.

[@gordonturnbull7916]

Your mom is always with you. At ur side .Ur love for her and her love for you.... death has no power over that my friend. Talk to her. She is there always

[@cy_nantia]

Wonderful speech, everything is spot on. Lost my dad last April and i am still struggling to breathe

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Cynantia, I imagine you will never see my response but I wanted to say that I hope that you, despite how recently your father died, are able to breathe just a little easier.

[@TT-ny6kz]

My wonderful loving kind husband died on tues 9th nov I am lost beyond words he was my everything

[@robbiestamp8454]

I should really come and respond more frequently to the comments here. I always do try and respond if people reach out to me.

[@evasfinch8687]

A week after my 20 year old son passed, my daughter, his sister, sent me this. I needed to hear this and she knew I did. It’s ben more than 4 years and I always come back to this video because it validates my journey of grief. Friends and family expect you to move on...I am trying to move forward..

[@sonja897]

My son died 3 months ago. No we don’t move on or get over it but we can when we’re ready to move forward. What we need is for people to just be there and to listen without judgment or trying to fix us. To allow us to grieve.

[@hjtres7261]

This is a fabulously accurate description. I wish all of you peace and love.

[@robbiestamp8454]

thank you. I am trying to respond to everybody here and thank you for your wishes - they are kind.

[@sherrijones9234]

I watch this video all the time. It helps me with the grief of losing my son, it gives me solace in understanding my pain

[@RayaxMaxine]

Me too. I watch this every night. Somehow gives me comfort..

[@kimyurkovich2819]

This helped me so much during my grief. Thank you.

[@patilpranitauttamrao8723]

I lost my sister and brother-in-law in car accident 2 months back. My nephew is just 8 years old. I always go back to the day i last talked with her, she was very happy. I miss her laugh as it used me vipe out all my worries. She was always there whenever i needed her. Someday the pain is too much to go forward and someday my heart somehow manages to survive. I am now living and studying just to make sure i will be capable enough to take care of nephew.

[@MamaZShaman]

So very true I feel this having lost my only child at only 24 -16 months ago.

[@robbiestamp8454]

I am sorry to hear about your child. There is no scale of grief, but no one should have to bury a child. And judging by when you posted this, you I imagine you must still be in profound shock

[@MamaZShaman]

@@robbiestamp8454 Thank you for having a heart which is rare today; yes I am. I am up and handling what has to be done. It hurts

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@MamaZShaman it is so very very recent - find that balance between 'up and handling' and compassion for yourself. Don't add being hard on yourself to your pain

[@MamaZShaman]

@@robbiestamp8454 I'm on my own 100%, and feel like we went through a sci-fi movie for 2 of the 4 years in the way he 'experienced,' opiates and the lack of where to turn for help. I feel like I went through a whirlwind and now I am here alone; I grieve that he has lost his life in such a terrible way with years of suffering under this thing. I wish I could have and I worked hard to prevent this from happening. I have no one. My closest friend is very unaware of what this may feel like and she hadn't called on holidays. I sat alone Thanksgiving, feeling as if I couldn't or didn't want to go on. My work, as a Shaman & Medicine Woman is 37 years and so reading, study, researching is what is keeping me going. I have lived with very "clean" lifestyle and I never had depression, I don't do doctors nor meds, but it's stark with the "virus" and the fear mongering, and then also having 5 major life changes. As an Elder, 60 this July I am physically working hard to get my physical back from over a year while he was addicted of heavy sleep loss, panic, adrenal exhaustion and then finding him dead on his floor at his newly rented room for rent. I saw the signs, and I wanted to protect him.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@MamaZShaman i feel for you so. That is a lot to cope with. Underneath it all however tough it got you loved and were loved in return. One of the books that has made a profound impact on me this year is Braiding Sweetgrass and I have developed a fascination for Native American Language structures and the verbal suppleness and sense of possible relationship they embrace. May your journeying bring some peace one day.

[@loveandgrace57]

Spoke to my heart. Thank you.

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

I wonder how things are for you now. I am so humbled by all the responses here.

[@joeyserrano4172]

Robbie that was amazing! I lost my husband of 38 years we met at the age of 16. Everything you I said resonated with me. You were on point with everything you said. Many blessing to you my brother in grief. 💔💔💔💔💖😇

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Joey, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Joey, you will probably never see this but goodness me 38 years is such a long marriage and I hope that now two years on, there are some hours and days that are easier for you.

[@ChrisJohnson-lh9qb]

Hello miss, I'm sorry about your loss, trust me I completely understand your pains, I've had a great deal of lost in the past, I'm a single Dad with a daughter, I lost my wife 5yrs ago and I don't understand it, grief hit's different and every one sees things differently, I felt devastated and I still feel the empty space in my heart, I understand how you feel but life goes on because death is inevitable and we'll all have to face it someday, it's been quite a while and I hope you doing fine ? time they say is the best healer and I now understand it, it'd be nice to have a chat with you or maybe a great conversation if you don't mind sending me your gmail address so i could reach out on you ?.

[@garrybowers414]

Thank you so much for this lost my wife 11 day's ago

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Garry, on this journey.

[@Jerrymc1975]

Dear Garry, I lost my wonderful spouse 6 months ago from a tragic fall. I know what you’re experiencing and six months later it still feels like yesterday, but I’ve found tremendous healing watching NDE videos on KZbin. Hopefully you may find comfort too.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Garry, you may never see this but I wanted to post here myself for each person who responded with the hope that there have been some hours and days of respite for you.

[@sonyacrcktt]

I loss mom December 28, 2023 and the pain goes so deep, I never could have imagined it would hurt so bad. I just want to talk to her.

[@matthewsteel3128]

thank you Robbie I still wish my dad was here theres many moments i have wanted him

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Matt, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Matthew, you may never see this but I do hope that your days are a little easier for you.

[@derekbratcher8996]

He is spot on! !!!

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Derek, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Derek, you will probably not see this but thank you for once taking the time to respond.

[@lethok4084]

It hurts so much

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Letho, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Letho, i should have been replying here many years ago but am doing so now and I just want to say that I hope that your pain has eased in these last three years.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@wgreenlee How immensely kind of you it has been to have responded to so many people who have left comments here. I should have done the same a long time ago and am trying to make amends now. I have been contacted personally by people over the years and always try to respond and have indeed entered into long correspondence with some. But I thought I would pause here and hope that maybe you will see my response here and my thank you to you

[@wgreenlee]

@@robbiestamp8454 You are a good man, Robbie.

[@irenebarnes474]

So True! Perfect description with the Ocean! ………..

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Irene, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Irene, I imagine you will never see this but I wanted to thank you for once taking the time to respond and to say that I hope that your days are kinder places for you now.

[@gillbennett2844]

All true, and very impressive. A very helpful contribution, whatever one's situation.

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Gill, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Gill, i imagine you will never see this but I wanted to post and say that I hope that your days are easier now and the storms come less often.

[@sdboykin1]

... Thank you Mr. Robbie Stamp . . .

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Stephanie, I imagine that you will not see this reply. I should have been keeping a much closer eye on this humbling thread. But thank you for once taking the trouble to add your voice here.

[@couchmayne4351]

Lost my grandma this Sunday most painful thing I ever dealt with everything will be different from now on I miss that lady she was only 67 and her death was so sudden I was picking her up from her house to take her out to eat and get her out the house and my aunt pulls up and tells me to go to the hospital because she passed it hit me like a door and idk if I’ll ever get over it

[@robbiestamp8454]

I am so sorry to hear this. I am trying to respond to everybody today who has posted here and looking at when you posted only a few weeks ago, I can only imagine that you are still in the midst of your pain and shock and death is truly shocking. I only know , for sure, and there are few things about which I am certain in life, is that your Grandma would, when they come, be glad of your moments of respite.

[@bonniebikowski7478]

Dear beautiful souls. I just lost my baby Saturday3-26-22. I have been in unbearable heartbreaking pain to the core of my very soul. The unconditional love I received and the Soul connection was so deep that we shared together and still do after passing is beyond human words. I believe he is with God and Jesus and all the angels in heaven. We will always have a spiritual connection with each other through life and in passing. I also believe that each and every one of us is here for a special reason and that is of true love. Sending love and light form my heart to all of yours!❤🙌🌈💜

[@lyndanixon4824]

Lost my son ...37..6 weeks ago...i'm in such agony...he died of a massive attack

[@robbiestamp8454]

Oh Lynda, I don't know if you will ever see this but I am so sorry to hear about your son's heart attack and the agony you are in and agony I know it is. Words do fail at moments like this but my heart goes out to you.

[@lyndanixon4824]

@@robbiestamp8454 thank you so much for your kind words.I am getting by,day by day

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@lyndanixon4824 day by day it is and although I am certain about very few things, the older I get the more sure I am that those we love who have died would wish for us those moments of respite however fleeting.

[@johnhand3194]

I lost my brother 2 weeks ago, there is such a thing as a broken heart and it is so painful

[@allisonyoung4007]

It's taken me 8 months after losing my husband 2 watch this & it is remarkably true~

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Allison, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Alison, i have for a variety of reasons come back to read these comments and feel that I should have responded many moons ago. I am genuinely wondering how things are for you these days..

[@allisonyoung4007]

@@robbiestamp8454 TYSM❤ Your vid really helped me understand I wasn't crazy! . Well, I guess I still feel a little crazy but I'm not waking up in tears ever single day. It's so hard to make even simple decisions alone after 31 yrs of having help. My hubs was 20 yrs older than me & I'm finding at 57 that I underestimated my own strength. I survived a Hurricane 5 wks after he died & really didn't care if I lived. My son is now my "roomate"( lol) & helps me financially. (In 3 more yrs I can get hubs soc sec - but VA gives a small widows stipend which helps.) It still seems like yesterday, but.. Oops-See !? I ramble on bc I'm alone alot & no one ever asks me anything!🤣 Hope u are doing well & ty again for sharing ur story.

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@allisonyoung4007 thank you for responding and i am glad that your son is with you - and i really do understand that three years is both three years and yesterday...

[@ChrisJohnson-lh9qb]

@@allisonyoung4007 Hello miss, I'm sorry about your loss, trust me I completely understand your pains, I've had a great deal of lost in the past, I'm a single Dad with a daughter, I lost my wife 5yrs ago and I don't understand it, grief hit's different and every one sees things differently, I felt devastated and I still feel the empty space in my heart, I understand how you feel but life goes on because death is inevitable and we'll all have to face it someday, it's been quite a while and I hope you doing fine ? time they say is the best healer and I now understand it, it'd be nice to have a chat with you or maybe a great conversation if you don't mind sending me your gmail address so i could reach out on you ?.

[@paulcarr4099]

Lost my wife 3 months ago from brain cancer gilobastoma feel so lost and lonely feel ripped off I don't get how anyone can deal with losing their soul mate best friend wife she was my life how do you fill that big hole it's known been 7 months and I still feel the same sometimes worse I am so lost and lonely my wife was my sole mate my best friend and I lived for her now I don't know what to do anymore I feel like I am in a hole that I can't get out I easy told over time things will get better but I am not sure how

[@derekarnold3665]

I lost my wife too from cancer 4 months ago. I was married for 41 years and my life is filled with memories looking back at the time we spent together.

[@daniak6699]

I hope you are both better now. I lost somebody deer to me and it hurts. Cannot even imagine what it s like to be you.

[@sammie4695]

Paul, so sorry for your tremendous loss as I am sorry I had to have a loss like that too. What upsets me too is that in just a few months people pressure one to get over it or to go on with your life. I will go on because I have to. But I'll never "get over it. I understand how you feel. It hurts and the pain runs deep.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Paul, I imagine that you will not see this but I wanted to respond today and say that I hope that you have found some moments of respite, though judging by when you posted, it is all so recent and I fear that the pain will still be very intense. The one thing I can be sure of, and I am certain of very little as I get older, is that when the moments of respite do come, however fleeting, that your wife would wish them so ...

[@paulcarr4099]

@@robbiestamp8454 thank you so much for your support you are so right when you lose someone you love its like being on the ocean getting tossed up and down. I have had some days that seem to be calm but from no were the waves come

[@zacoda42069]

Grief is what you feel and how your mind and body copes with not being able to share your love with the individual that has passed. It does get better.

[@TalkSportsKida]

3 years ago my first love passed away I’m still in so much pain. I hope one day we’re reunited to continue where we left off

[@shirleysarradet2052]

Paul died 5 weeks ago. We were married 68 years. I lost half of me. My heart. My love. My partner. My 9 children’s Father. Thank you.

[@robbiestamp8454]

68 years is very special and so long too now to have to live in the mystery of the presence of absence and the absence of presence. This will I think be your first holiday season without Paul. I hope there are some moments of calm and joy for you and your nine children (and some grandchildren maybe?)

[@miabellajenny]

Thank you so much for your support.

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Jenny, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Jenny, I know it is unlikely you will ever see this but wanted to come and respond quietly to everybody who had been moved to respond and I hope that you do now have some times that are peaceful.

[@helenrichardson5972]

All so very true and comforting . Thank You.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Thank you Helen. I decided today to try and respond to everybody who has posted here and reading all the thoughts is a powerful experience ..

[@willdonoghue9389]

Thank you Robbie very moving honest and the truth

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Will, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Will, you may never see this but i do hope that some of your days now have some respite in them

[@willdonoghue9389]

@@robbiestamp8454 thank you Robbie as you know each day is a struggle and struggle we do each day may God bless you and yours thanks for making sense of something most people can not make sense of much love to you

[@willdonoghue9389]

@@wgreenlee love to you wade God bless

[@wgreenlee]

@@willdonoghue9389 And to you, as well.

[@Tipyc1]

Very moving Robbie and very useful advice on how to handle this inevitable aspect of life....

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Yvonne, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Yvonne! I am trying to respond to everybody who has posted here over the years - a recent repost of the talk on LinkedIn lead me to the comments here and I have been so moved to read them all and am feeling very much that I should have responded to people long ago..

[@kerish23]

My friend was believed to have fallen off the ship in the middle of Atlantic Ocean. How can I get over with ambiguous loss? He’s still missing until now. I’m so depressed.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Oh, I am so sorry to hear that. That phrase "ambiguous loss" is a very powerful one and ambiguity (or regret or remorse) does indeed bring yet another dimension of the body and mind's experience of grief. I feel for you i really do.

[@alin81-82]

Been grieving for 3 weeks for my daughtercat, Yoko. I feel like I'm in those tidal waves w brief moments of calm. I've been through grief when I lost parents many years ago. I feel less alone hearing these stories & videos. Anything that will help you, do it. We have to find our way through this storm.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear James, I hope that the storm has indeed abated just once or twice now for you but am aware that as we enter this season of family get togethers, the absence is still so hard.

[@angellaryea-adu4450]

I just lost my Great Great Grandmama just last month andi am still numb andstill mouring and know she is now in heaven with the Angels 👼👼👼👼🙌🙌🙌 but i know that she will never ever be forgotton it pain she passed away on MARCH 29TH 2020 RIp i know that she will always being looking down on us

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Angel, I am sorry that I am now responding to you. How wonderful to have known a Great Great Grandma and how painful her death must be but I am glad that you can feel her loving gaze still

[@harshitachaudhry3536]

Beautiful

[@robbiestamp8454]

thank you Harshita. I don't know if you will ever see this, but am trying, in these strange days, to respond to everybody who has taken the time to post here. It is quite an experience.

[@aimeemacdn]

So true.

[@gailsmith5231]

Thank you

[@robbiestamp8454]

Thank you Gail for once taking the time to post here - this is a very beautiful thread for all the pain that there is here too.

[@zoltanhorvath9055]

Best video on grief…

[@gymrachel]

powerful and poignant 🌹

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Rachel, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

I doubt you will ever see this response but I do hope that three years on there are days of respite for you now.

[@carolynhiscock9457]

Very well described…

[@lilyanamenchaca]

I just want my daughter back....

[@geordielassie1]

Lilyana Menchaca ah hunny I'm so sorry! I've just lost my mother and that's bad enough but can't imagine losing a child, I've had a miscarriage and almost had a nervous breakdown! If you need to talk send me a message don't suffer in silence hunny xx

[@MrSA1829]

im so sorry you lost your baby. Sadly, I know your pain

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Lilyana, on this journey. I say the same thing about my son every day. I understand and wish you peace.

[@jacquelinestewart3820]

I want my daughter back to god bless you

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Lilyana, I imagine that you will never see this but I wanted to say today thank you for posting and that i hope that there are now some moments of respite for you.

[@theloudown]

Wonderful speech, thank you!

[@wgreenlee]

Love to you, Louise, on this journey.

[@robbiestamp8454]

Dear Louise - I imagine now that you will never see this but I wanted to say thank you for once bothering to respond

[@theloudown]

@@robbiestamp8454 You have excellent timing. I just lost my sweet dog Luna, and, once again, very much needed to hear this speech. And here you are, with your comment serving as a reminder it's here. Thank you again!

[@robbiestamp8454]

@@theloudown I am sorry to hear about Luna. I genuinely understand how tough the death of a much loved animal can be - I had a beautiful orange cat called Moose about whom I wrote poems and I miss him still , many months now since he died.