How to Cope When a Loved One Changes Beliefs

[@jjfranco0426]

This is a real issue - When I left the Church it was so very hard on my wife - Her hurt was real - She love Heavenly Father and she loved our family - We decided that we wouldn't tell the children and that I would attend church with them each Sunday - I left for 7 years until the Lord called me back ( different story) - During the time that I was away - my wife loved me and was kind to me - She is truly a Saint!!!

[@ruicraner4693]

Thanks for sharing, this gives me hope. My husband left last year. He stoped going to church when our oldest was baptized this Jan. It's hard every Sunday that he stays home, drinks. He just don't want nothing to do with it anymore. I still love him and don't push him into anything church related, let him decide if he wants to do it.

[@pierreducos4387]

@@ruicraner4693 We are praying for you, and yours. *Angels are attending you.* Keep your hope about you. The Lord is with you, and He will counsel you in what to do. We love you, and you can add our prayers to the hosts of angels which surround you and your family - *Stand firm and steadfast.*

[@Irvingdector]

It would be amazing to listen to your story on the Come Back Podcast!!!

[@Irvingdector]

@@ruicraner4693 Love him, as Jesus Christ loves him. This is the Gospel of Christ, a gospel of second chances, of hope and love. Don’t we believe that we can accept Christ in this Life or during the second coming or even in the after life? Yes! There are so many chances. Families can come together even in the after life.❤

[@Irvingdector]

@@ruicraner4693 Im coming back to the church after years of being inactive and questioning. I’m coming with a way real and stronger testimony of my Savior. I’m glad I went to that because now I can see things differently, I thought I had a testimony but it was more like a robotic list of things now I'm more into Christ and I believe this is His Church.

[@citizencase17]

I was an atheist before ! I felt very cool and smart about it. I thought of believers as psychologically weak people who needed some one to cling on to. Then, one day it happened ! I was walking on the street in my country (Sri Lanka) in 2002 when two young American missionaries approached me (Sri Lanka no longer permits foreign missionaries to come in) and started talking to me about the church and the Book of Mormon. I honestly felt some thing happening in me, and I felt I needed no reasons to convince me anymore of the existence of God. It just happened ! I am really sad to hear that this brother is going in the opposite direction of what happened to me. I hope and pray that the spirit touches him, and he comes back to the fold !

[@wiselivingph9371]

This is an amazing conversion story. Thank you for sharing!

[@av8ionUSMC]

Great story, thanks for sharing! Two of the greatest days in your life is when you come into this world and when you learn why.

[@ScottMackintosh]

I am so happy to see the church addressing real life issues. These moments can be so devastating but don't need to be. I am convinced that God allows us to be in so many different situations not only for the person going through the struggle but for us and how we react to it. React in love and I feel that is what God would want.

[@joelnert]

On point as usual, Scott.

[@ethanchurch4661]

Scott Mackintosh well said thank you

[@erostucko]

Agreed. I feel the the church under President Nelson is continuing to focus on personal conversion and personal responsibility. Videos like this will not only provide comfort and perspective for those who remain in the church, but will also result in many currently struggling with their faith to decide that it’s “okay” to leave the church. By putting more responsibility on individuals (including through the new ministering program and home study expectations), it really requires members to make a personal decision about their faith rather than simply “go with the flow.”. The work is moving on at greater speed (1 Ne 14:7). May we all have the strength to endure til the end, while showing Christlike love and understanding to those who choose otherwise.

[@northsouth8884]

Scott Mackintosh Nothing is a more selfish desire than wanting to live forever in “heaven.” Especially when that “reward” is offered to you by man, or false gods. Do you really trust God, or just man?

[@felcj2892]

@@northsouth8884 I trust God.

[@yellowyosh470]

What an amazing husband to respect his wife and her beliefs, and what an amazing lady to respect him. ♥️ So glad they are still a family!

[@serenitysoundscapes-2024]

I've seen KZbin videos and social media posts about people leaving the church and while that breaks my heart, I'm so proud of those who choose to unconditionally love those who chose to leave. That's how it should be. Christ loves us unconditionally and we should love others that way as well.

[@lukev483]

The church doesn't teach unconditional love though that is why there are different degrees of glory. Those who are not obedient to their leaders don't get to go back to return to live with God. They teach there are other degrees of glory but not in the presence of God. If my child didn't obey me in everything I would want them still to be able to live with me and in my house.

[@00Fisher00]

@@lukev483 You misunderstand. God loves all of us and wants to give us all He has, but can only do so if we receive it from Him. The Celestial Kingdom isn't just a place where people go that happens to be really nice; it is the Celestial Kingdom because of who is there; who we are in eternity depends on who we have become in life. Yes, we are supposed to love everyone, as God does, but that doesn't mean that everyone's actions have the same consequences. The Celestial Kingdom also isn't about being obedient to Church leaders. We should follow God's counsel, and Church leaders assist us with that. There have definitely been some Church members and leaders who have misunderstood that, but eternal life isn't about bossing people around.

[@GoatlikePersonality]

Thanx Sarah. My ex left me with the words "i love you, but i love them more" refering to the JW. I grew up JW but my shelf broke when I grew up.

[@coolhead8686]

@@lukev483, What is the point of religion if it does not save relationships from breaking up?

[@nonosfavorites]

While I agree that unconditional love is wonderful, I'm not sure it's what I would do. My sister stayed with her husband when he left the church 20 years ago and over time influenced all 4 of their kids to leave. She goes to church alone each week. I think she should have put up more rigid boundaries but the problem is that all of this happened slowly over time. One of my nephews has addiction problems now. Sure, this could happen with active parents but I'm not sure I could take that chance. My advice, I think, for my kids would be to leave.

[@nathanmclaughlin2777]

As someone who went from Latter-Day Saint to Agnostic and furiously Anti-LDS to coming back to the Church, this really resonated with me and pierced my soul.

[@Hala-ataa]

Welcome back, brother

[@MajorMustang1117]

Why did you go back? I'm in the Anti-LDS stage, but I miss the church. Ironic.

[@franciscop.9745]

Brother believe God not man. Man is a liar but the Lord is everlasting truth. He said, "Heaven and Earth may pass away but my word shall not." He is Good on keeping His promise. The Bible is God's true word and contains the true Gospel of Jesus Christ. I had never seriously doubted God before I went to the Mormon church and when I found out that it was a lie God let it happened to me so I would have understanding. I was so troubbled that night and God gave me what was way more than just a dream. He showed me that HE was real even when man is a liar. I plea with you, turn to the real teachings of God and you will never doubt again. Don't listen to the one that comes to you with flattering words of wisdom, the message of our Lord and savior are foolishness to those that are perishing. But it is the simpleness of the Gospel that saves. Read the Bible with the understanding that it will give you about the truth. Let no one deceive you for there are many that do. They always attack the word of God in the Bible and try introducing false teachings. God is One he has ALWAYS BEEN GOD. May He come soon.

[@jannercervantes219]

@@MajorMustang1117 every one of us. Will come to a point of turning back. If that point happens, we are still here for you brother.

[@zoinks8868]

Nathan, i need your help. Im 13 years old and i dont know who to turn to. Im having serious doubts about the church. Advice? Should i tell my parents? Can you convince me to turn back? Im struggling.

[@sandy-ke1kr]

A lot of people are commenting about the husband not saying enough on the video. If you notice, the title of this segment it's about how to cope when a love one changes beliefs. He changed his beliefs, so she is the one coping. So, they are focused on her so that others in her situation can also cope and maintain the family together.

[@shaneminer15]

If you think that the person who changes beliefs isn't coping, it just shows how little you understand about faith transition.

[@00Fisher00]

@@shaneminer15 Sandy didn't say that; she just was pointing out the emphasis of the video.

[@johnnyappleseed6665]

also women talk WAY MORE then Men

[@Geoffr524]

@@johnnyappleseed6665 Men can be indifferent and not very open about their feelings. Being 60 now I have seen these issues a lot.

[@hillaryfevrier3159]

We need a support system and community for those of us who marry active members in the temple, etc we check all the boxes and then our spouse chooses to change direction. I am going through it right now and I want to talk to others who are too. Let's not hide our truth! We are not alone!

[@Ether-pb5gb]

hang in there. You are not alone. Praying for your husband

[@Ether-pb5gb]

@@bjoy3642 hope you are doing well. Just do the best you can, and realize that everybody is on a journey. Sometimes doubt is a part of that journey. Praying for your husband

[@joshKirito]

I don't think the spouse chose to change direction in this video. He just wasn't feeling it anymore

[@chandlerwalpole3216]

Hills! Holy cow girl! Idk if you ever remember me, but you are not alone. This is a hard thing, but it’s doable and it’s going to be okay. Just love your spouse and learn to let them make their own decisions. It’s so hard but it’s okay.

[@ruicraner4693]

I agree Hillary and Ivy, I been going through this for a year. My husband at the time was 2nd counselor in the bishopric. And now a yr later his family is out of the church. The thing that is killing me besides him drinking, he wants to remove his name from the church records. After he promised me in the very beginning he would never go that far. That right there hurts the most. Like our temple marriage/ or being together means nothing to hi.

[@otuafirst9122]

What a beautiful soul. She lives the gospel in her actions to love unconditionally. For love is understanding & not forced. God bless this wonderful family. ❤

[@annasteig2923]

Wow...this is exactly what I am experiencing now. My husband and I met at BYU-I. We got married 11 and a half years later. In his mid 20's he quit going to church and several months ago told me he no longer even believes in God. It was hard for him to tell me, cause he thought I was going to leave him. And it was hard for me, cause what he told me made me so sad...But we knew we still loved each other and wanted to stay in our marriage. And we have. He supports me in taking our children to church and raising them in the gospel. I don't try to force him to go back. I simply love him and try to show kindness.

[@00Fisher00]

I hope that sometime soon he seeks God in prayer and gets an answer that comforts him.

[@EdelweissM_TheJourney]

Her testimony and strength of character are so amazing! I hope things will fall into places as they continue working together and coping with the changes!

[@chandlerwalpole3216]

I wish I could like this a million times over. This is an issue that so many people deal with.

[@joshua_sykes]

Wow. This is new. Thank you for sharing this uplifting, enlightening, and heartfelt video. It will improve our understanding and compassion toward others within and without the Church.

[@tnat9212]

I don't think I could do this. Kudos to this couple for working through something so difficult and to the church for putting out a video about this.

[@davect01]

God bless this family. I went through four years of my wife being inactive and it was tough. Thinking of her turning from the Gospel blessings almost broke me and our relationship but we worked through it and she finally has returned.

[@traczebabe]

Dave Taylor you give me hope my son & his wonderful wife will return. Thank you for commenting.

[@ieatfriedpikmin]

Some times people leave and realize they are happier people without the church. Yes, I agree it is hard to accept at first, but it's also perfectly fine in the end. I'm glad you two are happy, but hoping that someone will return and basing your own happiness/relationship on that does not seem very wise to me.

[@allanmount]

@@ieatfriedpikmin thank you for saying this Evan. 100% agree.

[@00Fisher00]

@@tdubs5128 I'm curious as to what has brought a more meaningful relationship with Jesus Christ. Could you elaborate?

[@00Fisher00]

@@stevensmith6691 You're making some negative assumptions about Dave Taylor when you know almost nothing about his situation. That's a mistake; we really don't know whether he caused tension in his marriage or not. If you're remembering things that happened in your marriage and assuming that they happened in his, I'd suggest that such an assumption is very possibly incorrect. Also, I would point out that accepting people's agency doesn't mean that we feel no pain over it. For example, a parent witnessing a child taking a harmful path in life, regardless of the context of religious belief, may well be fully accepting of the child's agency, but will almost certainly feel pain over it anyway. Perhaps more importantly, what you're not doing is seeking to understand why people are devastated. You suggest that it's "over nothing", but that's not giving people credit for their own experience--they feel something very poignant and painful. (Some would suggest that this is the very mistake that Church members make with those who find themselves losing faith, and they may be often very correct, but in this case it's the opposite.) You could ask them to explain their feelings, as part of truly seeking to understand them, or you could at least acknowledge that you don't understand why they feel the way they do. As to your wife, what is highly probable is that the true teachings of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints gave her hopes of eternal joy with a husband who would work with her toward her goals. Later, she has found herself missing a crucial part of that hope--the man she loves is not sharing and working toward those goals. She cannot feel a complete hope of the eternal marriage she desires, and feels a serious sense of loss over it. That's a big deal--really big--and it's natural for people to feel that way. Suggesting that people shouldn't feel hurt over something very painful is not the right thing to do. I take it that you want them to resolve their feelings and not be bothered; by a similar token, I hope that you resolve your feelings of anger or frustration over people who are genuinely hurt.

[@jobie105able]

It is easy to espouse Christ like attributes like loyalty and unconditional love. It is much harder to practice when the opportunity comes knocking at your door. This was so needed. Finally.

[@davidchoate512]

My family used to not have to worry about this issue, but free agency does this to every family. You can’t force your family to believe what you believe. They can’t force you to leave the church, either. It is truly heart wrenching to see beautiful families go thru this, but it’s part of the plan of salvation to learn how to be together with different beliefs. Lehi wanted so badly to keep laman and Lemuel holding on to the iron rod to partake of the fruit, but they chose a different path. Sometimes , all we can do is love them.

[@TG-zu2ih]

Thank you for this. I’m so grateful for this family being willing to share their experience. This trial has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever gone through. I really appreciate that she brought up the covenants they made with God that began their union. It’s a feeling of deep betrayal when your “eternal companion” sets aside the foundation of your relationship.

[@thrivinginlife5625]

What stands out to me is this man’s open honesty with his wife. Many spouses feel the same, but hide it. He trusts his wife enough to share who he really is with her-an

[@tonigreen2654]

This is the hardest struggle I have been through. That breach of trust and broken promises is so painful. My husband and I are working through it but I wish the church acknowledged this struggle more. Videos like this are a life-line. I feel very much alone with the huge weight of not only leading my family spiritually by myself but also navigating a split marriage that began with a temple sealing. Going to the temple alone is often more painful but I have faith that it can bring help, just like she testified.

[@ortegapereyracintiadaniela2328]

This video is what I needed. I have been looking for information on this topic for a long time... there are many families in the church going through this situation. Mine included...😢

[@amandadepew5092]

I have been through the same situation and know how heartbreaking it can be. I'll be praying for your family, Daniela!

[@supensabideo]

"Don't worry it's all going to be fine on both sides" is my best advice. We all left (me, my wife, my 4 kids) and it had been the best thing for all of us. We don't have the same fears, the same worries, we are just present and happy more often. Our only worry is the worry of our families who think we won't be in the Celestial Kingdom with them. We realize some find out about all the bad stuff and wish to stay and we get that is what they need to be happy too. We wish all to be happy both those who stay and those who leave.

[@hillaryfevrier3159]

me too! you aren't alone!

[@lanifanene8532]

I’ feel so bad for u😢

[@ndawgstrike]

I just got the courage to tell my wife about my recent feelings about the church and the faith crisis I am going thru and I could see her life collapsing as I was explaining to her my difficulties. Neither of us have been the best examples of followers of Christ but we both wanted our kids to be brought up in the church. That hasn't changed for me I just don't believe in it anymore. I hope my wife and I can find a way to make our marriage work just like this couples. It gives me hope to see this video that we can work it out and both be happy in our marriage.

[@00Fisher00]

Would you care to share your thoughts and experiences more? Were you raised as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints?

[@ZeeMusicalMaverick]

So beautiful to finally have a video I feel I can relate to. I am going through this right now and some days I just feel so helpless. We don’t have children yet so at least we don’t have to worry about that aspect. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for sharing your story. I hope my husband and I can continue to build a strong marriage and friendship despite his choice.

[@Dadsworld_]

You had a spouse who accepted that help was needed and allowed a 3rd party to intervene, that decision in itself it’s a blessing. My wife just walked away and wouldn’t talk about or even try, then filed for divorce. Wish you two the best.

[@benhopkinson9909]

I'm so sorry to hear that Derek. I wish you all the best.

[@farrenwalden2091]

A beautiful story. So much like mine. I think the trait that is most necessary in these circumstances is Respect. It is so hard to respect someone leaving the church and often so hard for the one leaving to respect their partner who stays. My wife and I have become much closer than we ever were when we were both Latter Day Saints. Respecting each others freedom to have there own spiritual journey and allowing them to believe something that you believe is false can give way to abilities to love that are more godly than we could have ever attained.

[@Tk.utelab]

Good for you two staying together and understanding each other. My wife left the church and then left me. I was young and wouldn’t expect it. Now I know we are all on our own Journey and our relationship with God is a very personal thing even when we belong to a religion. Keep going don’t quit on each other.

[@7wernli]

so true, thank you

[@katieharris3964]

Beautiful message. Thank you for sharing how you navigated this difficult time in your marriage together. It’s one I plan to help me in my relationships with family who have experienced faith crisises of their own.

[@timothyfloogle]

if you're watching this, or come across this comment please, pray for my family rn? please. the world, needs more decent people who pray for each other and themselves. thanks in advance, love yall.

[@McChunkLovesBelgium]

timothyfloogle will do

[@fromthe4621]

Praying doesn't work

[@cathyknappen4467]

Sending prayers 🙏🙏

[@anna-vw1wq]

i just prayed for you. i hope your family is doing okay now. know that i love you & god has a place for you.

[@ky-zz1ym]

timothyfloogle hope you’re doing well! ❤️

[@shaniaa.1397]

My own mother left the church almost 6 years ago. So this hits home. And now my brother. All we can do is love them, continue on in faith, and trust in our Heavenly Father's plan

[@adammcmillen289]

and all we, who have left the church, can do is love you back and continue on in faith that one day you will understand our point of view.

[@00Fisher00]

@@adammcmillen289 I'm sure the love is appreciated. As to whether or not a given person understands your point of view, some certainly don't, but some do. Some who don't right now will later as they learn and grow. But even those who do understand well will hopefully continue to "love...continue on in faith, and trust in our Heavenly Father's plan" as Shania suggested, and hopefully they/we hold on to the best hopes for you and me and everyone else.

[@tatianaivan8363]

Going thru the same thing...

[@discoqueenmom]

Great message, i have been raised in the gospel and know it to be true, some of you might say hogwash it isnt true, i honestly dont understand how some people can be happy with out the gospel in there lives. As it has always brought me happiness through out my life. All i can say is you have your agency to choose, and i know regardless the lord loves you, weather you believe or dont believe etc. And im to follow the savior by loving people as the savior would . Its tough when its a loved one and my husband almost quit,but i loved him and shared my testimony often and he didn't quit. I thank the lord for that everyday. Cause even though i grew up in the church my dad was never a member and im so happy to have a priesthood holder in my family.

[@timpedersen4286]

This was good for me to see personally. The immature side of me kept waiting for the announcement of the reunification of Brandon with his earlier religious beliefs, but it didn't come. The absence of that part of the story allowed me to ponder that this is a continuing story, and one that is working and shows that a relationship is worth keeping even in the absence of paralleled religious views. Thank you for being willing to share a very personal circumstance.

[@jimf1964]

I met and fell in love with someone right around the same time as my conversion to the church. I can tell you it isn't always easy. The important thing is that just because someone isn't in the church, doesn't automatically mean they don't share the same values. So long as the couple has respect for the other's beliefs, and has the same moral values, and goals, it can work fine. My biggest issue is how much time I have for the church, since the church is set up to be a family sort of thing. If I'm really active, it takes away too much of the time I have for them, and visa versa. So I end up feeling like I only have one foot in either side.

[@kentbartschi8091]

Jim F The LDS church teaches that family is central to Heavenly Father’s plan of Happiness. If your activity in the church is taking you away from your family, then your doing it wrong. Place belief in God and in his son Jesus Christ first followed closely by Love for your spouse and children. This has kept my perspective centered on the things that really matter. Everything else takes a back seat to those two things in my life.

[@northsouth8884]

Jim F Scott Mackintosh Nothing is a more selfish desire than wanting to live for ever in “heaven.” Especially when that “reward” is offered to you by man, or false gods. My fiance just left me for the Church. They don’t care about families. She admitted she got baptized because the missionary guy who first came over (every night for weeks) was hot. You are among weak minded fools my friend.

[@melavery3760]

Jim F It is so wonderful that you are committed to staying in the church even when it isn't easy. I love you, the Lord loves you, you will be blessed for your dedication. Please don't feel like you have to do this alone or perfectly. This life is a time of practice and trying again. I hope you have friends in your ward or branch that will support you, and I hope that like this couple you and your spouse can communicate effectively. ❤️

[@Yelta]

So glad these videos can show the reality of what is going on in families, not just how perfect families look in appearance. Grateful that we can learn through Christ to be more compassionate, more patient, empathetic and humble. To convert to the Lord for some is right away, for others take time and time.We can be reminded of Alma the younger's conversion, Enos conversion and so many more...I am a convert too and with my husband, we love the gospel, raised 4 beautiful kids and one of them, a young adult daughter, decided that she does not believe in God and in organized religion. How did this happened? What did I do wrong? What did I missed?..did we teach her well? Were we clear and loving when we raised her in the gospel??....So many questions..that at the end I am just reminded that we all have our timing in turning to the Lord, we all make our on choices through the gift of free agency. As a mother I just have to lover her unconditionally and see her as Heavenly Father sees her, she is His daughter even if she does not recognized that. I am grateful for this experience that is teaching me to stretch closer to Heavenly Father and to our Savior. My eyes has been opened to a more understanding and more awareness of the purpose of our life here in earth.

[@Aperson4470-g5l]

This is such a beautiful story of being loving despite the differences and challenges. May happiness continue with you all.

[@deborahcastlemain3751]

Thanks! Once again, the real reasons we believe what we do is because of our life experiences. You have to heal as a person before you can “feel” God or His love. My heart and deep prayers go out to ALL of Gods children as they journey, heal, learn, experience, often as adults how to heal from life’s unfair dysfunctional experiences! Heal “with” Gods, not the worlds values as your goal and eventually it all really works out!❤️ Did in my life!!

[@ParleyPCat]

I was a little surprised with this message, I thought it would be about bringing the sinner back to the fold, but it was about acceptance. I wish that I was brave enough to come out of the closet with my family like the man in the video. The truth is, you don’t get to choose what you believe and it’s soul-crushing to lie and go through the motions daily for the sake of your family. I really wish this couple the best of luck, even though I can imagine a million more hurdles that they will likely have to face.

[@Lowebotz]

I know it was a year ago that you commented but hope you're doing well my bro. 👍

[@AdamBalinski]

This story will likely help many. Thanks for sharing. God bless you and your absolutely beautiful family!

[@miyajensen5960]

Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story. This has touched me so deeply!

[@elton3891]

Oh my gosh, my heart is full with the love and the hope. This story is very amazing! I love their faith and their testimony. The Savior's can heal us!

[@davidchoate512]

I’ve thought about leaving the lds church but as Peter asks , “where shall we go? Thou hast the words of eternal life.” I’ve learned to doubt my doubts and my doubts crumble . God bless these faithful wives and mothers who remain rock solid even when we brethren succumb to Satan’s junk .

[@arnoldronning5471]

Thank you for sharing this powerful video. It must have been difficult to make the decision to go through with the actual confession of your struggle together in front of the camera. What a powerful testimony to love, commitment, and common values. I had my doubts surface in college and now I have come full circle back to my savior, Jesus Christ. Peace to you and the family in the days and years ahead.

[@seneti2008]

What a beautiful story yet so much love felt throughout the video as well. Thanks for sharing. Beautiful souls.

[@cmdub97]

I can completely relate to this. My future husband was raised in the church by a mother and grandparents with innumerable amounts of faith in the Church. He has never had the testimony of Joseph Smith and the Church as I did and still do, yet he is so much more Christ-like in his dealings with others than I could ever be. I know that God sent me such an amazing man to be the father my kids do not have and to inspire me to be a better person. I know he is my eternal companion, though we have yet to make it there, because of his lack of faith, not in God, but imperfect men with callings in our community. I have never doubted God or Christ, though I am always doubting myself and my worthiness.

[@aprescoups4593]

This is the MAIN issue with the church. As people who belong in the church, we have to respect a couple’s relationship and respect their partner leaving the faith. You have NO idea how many times this has happened, especially since of recently. Members can be so cruel and start gossiping about their life and how it will change. Just how I told a member and my Bishop, "mind your business and stop telling her that her husband isn’t worthy." Guess what happened? A year later after soul searching the guy came back and is happy as ever, all he needed was some space! That’s it! Plus I got in trouble for saying that to our Bishop, but whatever, right is right and wrong is wrong. Sometimes we gotta hold our leaders accountable.

[@00Fisher00]

It's also good to remember that bishops are just regular people who have served enough and lived well enough to be called to serve some more. Many bishops have made a lot of mistakes just like other people do. In all cases, it's good for us to not be too hard on each other.

[@shawnlarrabee45]

I lived through a mixed-faith relationship for several years and it was difficult. Now my wife and I are both out of the Church and we're extremely happy. We're in the process of rebuilding our community, which has been hard, but we're working together.

[@filthyscorpion]

Hope to see you back someday. Glad you and your wife are still goin strong!

[@1zcott]

Out of the church and extremely happy? That's great. Enjoy it while ya got it.

[@jobie105able]

@@1zcott The main reason people who leave for intelligent reasons struggle to remain happy is because of those throwing shade.

[@srso4660]

@@jobie105able it could also be their conscience eating away at them At least that was my experience...

[@grandpaje4734]

The foundation of marriage is Love. That's the common ground. Where there is love, there is God. Just a matter of time for him to grasp that Love requires hope then... FAITH ! Just keep loving more and more...

[@burninginthebosom]

Amen.

[@khae_g]

❤️

[@zowilouise2843]

You can see how much he loves his wife. He sees her pain. I’m sorry for them but this video will help so many people ♥️

[@adamberry8182]

I had the opportunity to home teach an active member who is married to a practicing Catholic. It was really cool to see how they could still have a healthy relationship despite their very different beliefs.

[@karenpierce6424]

I have a brother who is LDS and married to a Jew. They have things worked out and get along quite well because they love and respect each other.

[@pedrosanchez1675]

You’re very about one thing, there ARE two sides to this story.

[@briandm33]

Realization is the greatest thing in life. People choose to create all things in their lives and when they obsorb things that are incorrect and unrightous they develop doubt and fear due to their ability to make and create choices that benefit them as a person. To all of us we react to a purpose in doing something in our lives and in that reaction the choice being chosen is what signifies a greater worth of actknowledgement. Seeking greater things and doing something productive in our choices produces good influences. Alot of people get caught up on the wrong things in life and we learn from those experiences. Nothing is bad until we make it become just that. Anything becomes something until you make it become the object you see in your eyes.

[@fatherjosephseedpeg]

When you feel heartsick and without the strength to lift your weary heads, gaze toward the heavens and open your hearts to the Father. Kiss the hand that offers sheer Bliss -- the _only_ relief from the trappings of doubt and discouragement. The Father kneels down to take you by the hand and leads you home. Never let your tears blind your eyes from seeing the Father's Prophet, who warmly takes you into his arms and welcomes you to peace, to family, to love. My dear, dear beloved, the Voice calls each of us to the Father's side. When the collapse of the wicked world comes, we will dwell, as one, in his glorious majesty. Give in to Faith and your doubts with fall away at your feet. Amen.

[@kevinghostneedham7928]

And call no man father upon the earth for you have only one father which is in heaven. Amen.

[@kit-riv1]

I'm always hurt whenever I hear a former member insult and spread lies about the church. But I also feel sorry for them because they lost the truth. I'm glad heavenly father can forgive anyone.

[@outsideview9052]

The wife was concerned that her husband would find the world more appealing than his family. Yet, neither of them tell us anything about how his life changed other than he wouldnt go to church with her anymore. Did he want to drink? Smoke? He certainly would still be a faithful husband. Her tithing? Did he hang around unsavory friends. What changed? It hurts her feelings but as President Eyring admitted in Conference this week, "we really dont know how our family relationships will be changed/handled/continued when we get to heaven". Maybe he meant extended family relationships but this seems to be one more thing to say "lets wait until we get there" to find out. If both people love each other and are compatible just live life and be happy. Dont ruin your happiness today over what you hope things will be like in heaven.

[@aimeeleigh3415]

Praying that this beautiful woman, husband and family will come into a personal relationship with Jesus, aside from religion. I pray that this faith crisis will pave the way for the whole family to come to know and be reconciled to the one true God, through saving faith in Jesus, and be with Him for eternity. Amen.

[@NimrodTargaryen]

It is uplifting to see hard issues like this brought up to surface. It’s is only then when we can address them. Encompassing love, kindness, understanding and prayers work miracles. Even Mother Theresa went through faith crises. Instead of judging we must concentrate in loving

[@brooks2010video]

Appreciate this video .... I am Mormon LDS Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints ... and we should be more like Jesus accepting of everyone ... particularly because so many people .... are not religious in our current culture and time. ... my wife of almost 30 years is not religious .... or interested in any religious institutions .... but she has stayed with me for 30 years ... knowing that I am Mormon and very religious

[@gillianfoxsmith8268]

That's beautiful

[@munachiadindu6358]

I feel for this beautiful woman! Thank you for sharing this 💖

[@Onlinesully]

McL • I dont at all. There are massive traumas people have to live with and this is just not one of them. sorry her husband had different beliefs and yes that's difficult , but come on

[@ericfarkas08]

Very brave to allow others into your relationship like this. 'Best to both of you.

[@salineexo4643]

There is no difference with him not believing in god then being a wife to a husband that is inactive, oh the fear of loosing him to worldy ways is horrible. You fear more for his soul then yourself. I have asked heavenly father the same thing why me? I have come to learn that agency has to be respected and that heavenly father will not interfere with that, but oh the blessings and love and comfort he had given me, my testimoney grew from that trial,8years later i am devorced and still hold on to that lesson and my faith

[@hienienguyen6766]

Yeah this is so me right now. i was in tears just telling my boyfriend how i felt about not going to go to church. This is one the hardest things that come together. I need to be more calmer and just realized that we come together in knowing we are different

[@churchofjesuschrist]

@Hienie Nguyen, thanks for tuning in to the video and sharing your experience. We wish you peace and happiness in your relationship as you navigate your differences. You are loved and always welcome here.

[@hienienguyen6766]

@@churchofjesuschrist no problem at all. yes i definitely glad that i was able to watch this

[@terrancenelson713]

Only those who have strong testimonies and are truly involved with the gospel will be able to withstand the strong storms that are ahead. Even in the times of uncertainty, we must push forward and support our spouses and children. Simply having faith will not be enough.

[@monalisa2662]

Amen... I feel the same. My husband left the church three years ago and scoffs when I say the same thing.

[@terrancenelson713]

I’m sorry to hear that, we have to endure to the end. As painful as it may be, it really is all about having a strong testimony in Jesus Christ.

[@yeshalloween]

There are some who have a strong testimony in Jesus but not necessarily in the Mormon faith.

[@gilvansantos4600]

Dear Beka, you are an example of faith and overcoming. I'm proud of you. I love you! Keep going. I believe in the Lord's promises in this scripture. “Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us acheerfully bdo all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the csalvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed”. (D&C 123:17)

[@anacarolina5634]

We Love you.

[@CraigNewsome.]

This is absolutely great!. My faith grows more and more as I see things like this get addressed

[@gingerdurbin2726]

Man, that is tough.

[@tucuxi70]

However, if one spouse stops believing and stays that way forever, the Eternal marriage is over.

[@guardianangel9517]

God bless your journey.. What a BURDEN 🙏🏼💜

[@MarleeCraig]

God bless you ♥️

[@charleelee4166]

I love that the Church is putting out these videos that so many can relate to. Although I am 26 and not married, I strongly feel like I can relate to this couple. So grateful for this couple and their courage to share their story. I love you guys.

[@bridgethastings5050]

This is such a needed message. So many people think "I could never do this" but you can't control your spouses actions or the way they think and form opinions. But also to be ok with them as long as they love you and you're both willing to make your marriage stronger. Sometimes you will beg the Lord to bless you with your righteous desire, and he says no. And that's ok. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you. It just means he has a greater perspective and understanding of your current situation. He understands you.

[@gisellemorgado6295]

Rebeca, It's good to know that besides the challenges you faced, you still have hope and remains following the steps of our Savior Jesus Christ. O pray that your familly recieves the blessings promissed in the Temple. =)

[@ekaterini2957]

Thank you for this. It just remind me to have faith. Thank you, thank you.

[@kiray1835]

i love You God and Jesus! Amen

[@mattstevens6380]

Going through this now. It is way harder than what this portrays even with the Lord's help. Almost unbearable.

[@rfreitas3298]

Wonderful video. God bless this family and that Brandon can feel His love

[@UpsideDownFork]

Thank you for opening up and sharing with us.

[@abbynotyou6369]

Sadly that doesn't happen to all the couples with this kind of situation, there are many of us who, no matter what we do, have a different and very painful ending to our situations.

[@monalisa2662]

Thank you for keeping it real... I live in quiet desperation every day because my husband decided to leave the church after 23 years and while our youngest son was on his mission. Now my son does not go to church either. The heartache is unbearable at times. I am praying for a miracle or the strength to endure or leave.

[@deboraholsen2504]

@Mona Lisa - yes, I know. My son doesn't go to Church, either, and even left his mission after 4 months. (Heartbreak again!) And just the day before yesterday, my daughter told me she thinks Jesus Christ is not our Savior!! :( (Gulp... shock and hidden tears and persuasions and disappointment and near disbelief! HOW could this happen??? We always went to Church and lived the Gospel!) Of course, I still love them both dearly, and I always will! They are still good, upstanding citizens who do good things! (I KNOW it's so hard to have a father who chooses to leave you! The pain of abandonment never quite goes away!) I keep them in my prayers and I have hope for them and try to look at all the positives (of which there are many!) and enjoy our good times, such as going hiking or spending holidays together. I will always be their loving mother and I know they're in God's hands. He has a plan for them, too, and I know that He let me raise them for a good reason. I remember all the years of their childhoods and I'm so happy that he has blessed me with children, even though they have chosen somewhat to deviate in the plans that we talked about for their lives. I have faith that they'll get back on the straight and narrow pathway someday, and until then, I'll keep on loving them and try to still be someone worthy for them to emulate.

[@abbynotyou6369]

Deborah Olsen “The Prophet Joseph Smith declared-and he never taught more comforting doctrine-that the eternal sealing of faithful parents and the divine promises made to them for valiant service in the cause of truth, would save not only themselves, but likewise their posterity. Though some of the sheep may wander, the eye of the shepherd is upon them, and sooner or later they will feel the tentacles of Divine Providence reaching out to them and drawing them back to the fold. Either in this life or the life to come, they will return. They will have to pay their debt to justice; they will suffer for their sins; and may thread a thorny path; but it leads them at last, like the penitent Prodigal, to a loving and forgiving father’s heart and home, the painful experience will not have been in vain.” Orson F. Whitney, in Conference Report, Apr, 1929, 110.

[@abbynotyou6369]

Mona Lisa You will have the strength to endure. Much like Alma and his people, you will be blessed and your burden will be made light. Remember that you are not alone. You have a Savior that holds and blesses you everyday.

[@Ether-pb5gb]

@@deboraholsen2504 let your daughter know why you know that Jesus is YOUR Savior. Each person can doubt, unless they feel it for themselves. John 7:17 "Anyone who chooses to do the will of God will find out whether my teaching comes from God or whether I speak on my own."

[@laurapetaia9503]

Thank you for sharing this video, and to the family who shared the trials they are going through, but also the solution that was demonstrated as well. Thank you.

[@pamweinberg1212]

Unconditionally loving one another, like the Savior loves us. Your a beautiful Daughter Of God. Your husband is a wonderful man. Each and every one of us has a journey we must go on, to strengthen our relationship with our Heavenly Father. I have been a way from the Church from some time. I have always been LDS. I look back at life a little differently now. Through my journey and trying to get back into where my Savior dwells, I know now I cherish that. (I had a testimony but, apparently it wasn’t strong enough.) Thank goodness God has not given up on me. I have always loved God and just like your husband he still loves the Church. (I always did.) Maybe God has something in store for him that requires a great testimony and much strength. (It’s an extremely difficult journey and that’s why God wants us to stay in his dwellings. So we can partake of the Sacrament, our bodies so much need in this day and time. I also think being away creates a lot of unhappiness , no one is aware of at first. It’s the small things he’ll notice that only he’ll know that is true in his heart, that will make the biggest impact on his life.) I am thristy to go back. I’m lucky to have 2 beautiful Sister Missionaries, who will be sitting with me this coming Sunday. It’s my new start. (I’m married to a Biker who is Jewish, and love him very much. I’m learning myself through humor and prayer. 😉 He doesn’t mind if I go. We support one another.) I loved watching General Conference this last time. It helped me dearly. Thank you dear, beautiful, Sister and daughter of God. Your tears and love will be rewarded. He will regain a better testimony with a Woman of Faith, like you by his side. Never give up. Patience, acceptance, love, and Faith is the Key. May God Bless you and your family.

[@soundofthesea1]

Thank you to this wonderful family for sharing your story ♥️

[@saffronhammer7714]

Thank goodness, there is no need to have a religion to have a happy, loving marriage--to be a good and moral person. This happens in reverse to couples when one joins a religion--and it can be as equally as damaging to a marriage and scary for the other mate. The fear--often founded that the new religion will become more appealing and important than the marriage and family. I suppose in this situation, if we take the example of this video, the couple may wisely choose to *not raise the children in the religion the one parent converted to. I guess there are a million ways to handle it, and each couple and family must find their own way. I wish this family the very best.

[@chelsrench3376]

This is how you know they love each other for who they are and not just religion. Beautiful people. ❤

[@njwareing6408]

Its a big world out there, there are only about 4.5 million active Members at the Moment, this is happening all the time to couples, its actually hard for both parties. There has to be acceptance on both parts.

[@clintonwatkins3718]

I guess i don't see why this is such a deal breaker for so many. People's faith is very individual. If your spouse who you love and are committed to comes to you and says they no longer or perhaps never did believe they are still the exact same person. Why would you want to leave? Why the "wailing and nashing of teeth"? This puts and unfair burden on the husband in this case to continue to live a lie. He didn't suddenly become an alcoholic or start cheating on his wife. He simply was honest about his current beliefs. Beliefs that by the way could always change again. The loss of a marriage or family should not be the price of a crisis of faith.

[@00Fisher00]

You're right that it should not lead to a loss of marriage and family. As to why it's so difficult in this case, the husband made serious covenants that he should not have made unless he had the strongest of convictions about his faith; he should have been fully aware of what he was promising to God with his wife. She thus had expectations of their faith being shared forever--throughout mortal life and afterward. Having that taken away is a big deal, and very difficult. Again, you're right that a crisis of faith should not cost people their families.

[@lebihus00]

This can be applied to our grown children too! We need to trust in the Lord Heavenly Father to show them the path to him.... whatever vessels they get to believe in him is primordial that they have a relationship with Him❤ love this video

[@seinipavia3268]

I am living this life now, my husband denies God and the church but he is still with me and I try not to let his change of belief affect my testimony of God and the church. I know God lives and He knows what we’re going through. He helps me comfort me when I need Him.

[@christylarsen691]

I know from personal experience that my first marriage did not last because we were going down different paths. I could not deny my faith or my testimony of the Savior and of the church--it was my anchor. On the other hand, my husband wanted the worldly ways and things and wanted me to be worldly too. We went through counseling and my husband is the one who decided that we needed to end our marriage. It was the right thing to do. i felt that a great burden had been lifted from off my shoulders. I was able to move on and start over in my life.

[@amandadepew5092]

I think you make a good point. When your values are too different from one another, especially when one is seeking worldly desires and the other steers clear of those things, you can no longer make things work and truly be happy.

[@yeshalloween]

Each couple is different

[@babymarcus123]

Powerful! Wow!!

[@GoatlikePersonality]

My wife left me when I stopped beliving. I am still a good person...

[@NoraSchulzz]

I’m sorry

[@00Fisher00]

I think it would be hard for many people to understand just how challenging this would be. If this happened to me, I would feel very betrayed; I would know that my spouse never should have made covenants leading up to marriage unless she had a testimony of God and the truth of the restored gospel. I can only imagine that this kind of trial would be a continual struggle. I hope that this video brings more understanding, and in turn, more compassion, love, and service for and to those around us.

[@lildwarflikes6386]

What about the pain of the spouse that went through a faith crisis. And has to watch the other struggle to accept the fact that they're being honest with their doubts.

[@xxkphxx]

rieja thorn I thought they covered that well in this video. They talked about how they both stopped communicating because it was so difficult in the beginning. But that they got professional help and learned to talk through their emotions, pain, and what they thought was true. It showed me that if you really demonstrate unconditional love (as long as someone isn’t being abused) you can work through things and have a strong relationship - regardless of two people believing differently.

[@00Fisher00]

@@lildwarflikes6386 It would definitely be difficult for the spouse in a faith crisis also, and I wouldn't want to minimize that. It would be different, though. The believing spouses out there have their greatest hopes and dreams founded in their beliefs and include both people working toward spiritual goals. As long as a spouse is turning away from those beliefs, the other's greatest hopes are shattered. That's the part that strikes me more, personally. I wouldn't be inclined to think that the trials and pain of each person are comparable, but I agree that both people need support and love. One point to be particular about: the doubting spouse might perceive that the other's struggle is about honesty, but the believing spouse is really struggling with the unbelief, and not the honesty. For myself, if I was in the situation I would appreciate the honesty a lot but wish that it had come much, much sooner--which is why I would feel betrayed. Thanks for keeping everyone's concerns in the picture.

[@ptyleranodon3081]

@@00Fisher00 I think it needs to be understood that a person going through a 'crisis of faith' experiences their greatest hopes shattered as well. The only difference is the context. In the case of the believing spouse their hopes for an eternal family suddenly feels like it's falling apart. For the person experiencing doubt that particular hope, as well as everything else they believed, feels like it is falling apart. In this video he admits that he probably never believed in God. Yet, in so many of these situations the person going through the crisis of faith was, at one point, a very faithful, believing member. I know I was.

[@jolayne0416]

@@00Fisher00 i would have much preferred this to have happened much earlier too but we dont have control over that. It isn't dishonest to have a faith crisis and it isnt a personal attack on my spouse. Its something that happened to me as well, my husband isn't the only victim.

[@solangesmusic.1877]

As an ex-member of 20 years who still have lots of loved family members in the LDS church, one thing that would be extremely helpful, in my own experience, is the opportunity for really open dialogues about the theological reasons we had which did not allow us to believe in the veracity of the church any longer. It is understandly, a scary topic to discuss, as people have fear to lose their own testimony. But if we are lovers of the truth, we shouldn't fear examining our faith and putting it to the test. I have been an Evangelical Christian for another 20 years now and love to study the Bible, having come to find out that its exclusive claim to truth hold water and doesn't mind close examination. My prayer is that someday I will be able to share about the biblical Christ with my family. I love them with all my heart.

[@00Fisher00]

The greatest test is asking God directly in prayer about the truth. Many members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints have done so, and have received answers from Him. We continue to study scripture, including the Bible, and take great joy in it.

[@yeshalloween]

I agree. I wish so much that my family would just want to know The reasons why I can’t believe like they now believe instead of just dismissing me as unfaithful. They have no idea and it’s largely because they aren’t willing to learn why.

[@bopeep86]

I an touched by this as well, but I have to say it would be devastating for me personally. I desire to have that spiritual connection. The visits to the temple- together. The promises that were made IF we live up to the covenants. It's hard to think that all that time was just a lie, and you were part of that lie, to not feel betrayed by his feelings. I'm glad he didn't choose his way of out of the marriage, but to be honest, that is usually the first step with spouses! I have witnessed it personally, they leave the church, then the wife, and entire family. It's a full break. I guess there is hope that he participated in this video..Because whether he admits it or not, he is acknowledging Christ's love for him, even if he doesn't believe. I hope there will not come a time he would not pull the family away from church activities, then full on attendance, because we are ALL human, and it's just so easy to stray on the daily, weekly, monthly! Truth! The world is enticing, but it is like the dust, easily gone, and worldly things die on earth.

[@tracie5245]

My former Bishop is sealed to a woman who has been inactive for 20 years. If you think they will be together in the Celestial Kingdom you're NUTS! If she repents and returns perhaps. As it's going now no way. She can't ride her husband's coattails into heaven.

[@sotl97]

What an extrodinarlilly difficult and complicated situation. Good for you two committing to your marriage, and working together rather that allowing this situation to work you apart and destroy your family. Thank you for doing this video as there are many amazing people suffering in the same situation.

[@marywilliams5864]

They stop believing in god because they start believing in the world

[@caitlynlewis4539]

I wish they would have also focused on HIS pain and how this affected HIM and how HE got through it. A marriage involves two people and when one of them leaves the church, it causes pain for both of them. There are minimal resources for couples who are dealing with this issue, so any resources provided should be inclusive for both spouses.

[@bretthardingtelford8043]

Tests and trials. We r all different. Serving two different individuals is a hard one. Good luck too you both.

[@benjaminmckay8567]

Thanks for sharing! Love it! I hope he will come back around. He seems like a good guy. I'm sure he will.

[@yeshalloween]

Benjamin McKay “good” is not only found in active members. If he never “comes back around”, that doesn’t take away his goodness. You do realize this, right?

[@traczebabe]

I needed to hear that, thank you.

[@CoolioBeans]

The biggest pain comes from the dichotomy that the church creates in its culture. This video is a textbook example of this. Individuality is a beautiful gift we are given as humans. It isn't this woman's fault that she experienced this pain. This is the product of the black and white mentality of most high-pressure religions.

[@Bobbyjoe4511]

One day, we wont even have to cope with such things.

[@koolaid772]

Your faith and testimony is so strong and powerful!! I pray for you and your family especially your husband! If he would of been honest at the beginning about not believing in god would you have still married him?