How to Deal With a Toxic Boss and a Toxic Work Environment

How to Deal With a Toxic Boss and a Toxic Work Environment. Toxic managers can really set you back in your career and in your life in general. They are THE ORIGIN of a toxic work environment, the ones who install it and those who keep promoting it. Whether you’ve started a new job at a toxic workplace or you just had a new manager assigned, suddenly your day at work has turned into an absolute hell. All the good things about the job disappeared or just don’t make sense to you anymore. You are NOT alone, more than 80% of employees have quit their job due to their bosses, some employees already quit their jobs due to major health conditions.
Unless you have a huge willpower and self control, you will get more and more emotionally affected by a toxic work environment and this toxic situation with your boss, which will result into a damaged self-esteem, constant stress, anxiety and even depression. In this video I share 8 strategies to help you cope and deal with a toxic boss and a toxic work environment, to make your situation more bearable and tolerable, while you keep working on your exit strategy. Get ready to show a maximum of patience and stick with me till the end to find out what a “grey rock” method/strategy is, which has proven to be very effective while dealing with narcissists, abusers and bullies.
You know that abusers love drama, and they will try to create one whenever possible because it puts them in control. Grey Rock is an approach to become unresponsive, similar to a rock. Your goal using this method, is to retain your control over your reactions and stay out of the drama. Some other videos which will help you while dealing with a toxic work environment and anticipate their micromanagement.
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Anyone who has worked for a toxic boss knows how they can impact all the aspects of your life! Your confidence, your self-esteem tend to go away. But not when you stop being afraid! Working in a constant state of fear is extremely damaging. Think of the worst which could happen to you at work? Getting fired! Which is nowhere as bad as turning into a walking zombie. Researcher who did studies on more than 3000 people, found out that employees who have managers with toxic traits are 60 percent more likely to suffer a heart attack or other life-threatening condition.
Be careful with whatever information you share with your coworkers because coworkers are not you friends. And what's important is for you to stop blaming yourself. No matter how toxic bosses make you feel, no matter what your boss says about you: “Incompetent”, “slow”, “not good enough”  -  you are NOT, their anger and toxicity are NOT your fault. There is nothing you can possibly do to be successful in this situation, except getting out of the toxic workplace. Think Karma! If you absorb the toxicity and transmit negativity yourself, you are likely to get even more negativity in return. Your boss will eventually get what is coming to them. Focus on yourself, on getting your work done the way you can and on getting out of there without looking back!
I am Marat from EMMOTION, myemmotion.com, Recruitment and Career Services Agency, look me up on LinkedIn. On this channel I train and coach you to ace your job interviews fast, to gain confidence as a professional and learn how to deal with corporate politics, being a better person yourself first.
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#toxicboss #toxicworkenvironment #dealwithabadboss #emmotionbymarat #toxicworkplace #coworkers #coworkersarenotyourfriends

[@myemmotion]

Have you ever had an abusive boss? What is your advice when dealing with toxic management?

[@MarcosRodriguez-es4gz]

I used to just say yes everything and kept it cool until she fired me

[@huangjinwei3755]

Toxic Boss for 4 yrs, cried every 2 to 3 mths. Sleepless night. What she said is nt wrong like wat u said, slow, square, 10yrs dwn the road will still be the same but only targeting on me. Scold n nag non stopped. I scare of cant get a new job due to my lack of qualification. I wont get terminated becos i in a govt sector. As long as i dont do anything wrong. She is nt wrong but her tone can be better n i told her that but she still treat me the same way. End up she will ask me to cover others n nt assigning any new job to me. What should i do?

[@huangjinwei3755]

@SG me 4 yrs n still enduring her. I mean u can ask me to leave if i nt up to yr expectations but never toxic me with words tat hurts.

[@reedrts1]

Forget about the money. We get so caught up with the money issue, it is almost like we get Stokholm Syndrom and make excuses for horrid behavior. I stayed in that crap job because I was making $33.50 an hour....it wasn't worth it. I make way less than that (for now...raise is coming) and it is a joy to go to work. I got out and while I was waiting to become a flight attendant, I sold handmade chocolates, cakes, and pies from my home, baked specialty pie in a professional kitchen, and sold Tupperware. Do not wait till the Straw breaks the Camel's back like I did and it turns into a shouting/cussing match.....don't let anybody cuss you at work for that matter......YOU CAN DO THIS!!!

[@myemmotion]

@@MarcosRodriguez-es4gz You have nothing to be sorry about then, it's on the other person. You've gone your best and hope you've moved into a much better environment now.

[@jackcarraway4707]

There's only one way to deal with a toxic boss: quit and find a different job. Life is too short to deal with these kinds of people.

[@davedogge2280]

Just walk into a meeting with a boss and say "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass and I'm all out of bubblegum !"

[@archieblanco2399]

@@davedogge2280 that’s where I’m at man….I love this job I have currently, but the guy I’m working with is a complete scumbag! He misses a whole week straight, but doesn’t notify our headquarters, so he still gets paid. My first day on the job, my grandmother passed, second day army battle buddy passed, third day I was in pretty bad car accident…..I didn’t miss any of these days! This guy is a narcissist, he’s driven the company vehicle drunk, etc etc, and the only life line I have, is that someone I was in the army with, but wasn’t super close with is the CEO, but apparently they’ve become somewhat close friends within the last three years, so I’ve been hesitant to reach out….anyways I recently reached out, explained that I’ve wanted to reach out for months now but have been holding back from doing so, and explained, that, “this guy talks to me like he can’t get punched in the teeth” I’m in no shape or form, fearful of this dude, from a “man to man” aspect, I just have a family to feed, so I’ve been dealing with this corrupt dirtbag

[@mrsk812]

I found a different job and then did not return to my very toxic job. My health is more important than dealing with her! It permeated every aspect of my life!

[@MelodyKuromi1980]

I am in a very toxic job now, i have only worked for one year and quitting aftet one year in the job will look bad on my cv.

[@tigisttibebu1654]

I wish,but getting job is not easy here

[@BePatientSeeLove]

Literally i wanna cry when I'm at work 😢😢😢

[@CeeVee714]

Me too!

[@Teresa-hvn]

You should never cry at work. If you're crying, something is wrong. It's time to look for another job.

[@lindawilson795]

I think a toxic boss is like a school bully - at heart they are unhappy and insecure.

[@SA-lz1vx]

This

[@johnpastore7685]

Yes, I have told toxic bosses, that to their face

[@lovemusic1963ify]

most likely a narcissist.

[@kathysue9890]

Exactly. I worked for a blind School. And the superintendent was toxic and so was the finance director, HR and outreach. Lead by example

[@prudhvichilukuri651]

Exactly

[@bbg4us]

I work in a toxic environment. All my coworkers do is gossip and run back and tell the managers anything they feel they could use to earn cool points. My supervisor is the ringleader that puts them up to the challenge to be untrustworthy towards others. The job is very easy, but it’s management with all of their trickery that makes the job more difficult than what it has to be. It’s their ego’s and foolishness that makes the work atmosphere very toxic. Some people are just not cut out to be managers or supervisors. You treat your workers with respect and chances are you will get it right back.

[@beasaroseco5840]

My manager would purposely make up ridiculous rules to make the work harder.🙄

[@bip-someandnone8698]

You nailed it

[@bip-someandnone8698]

@@beasaroseco5840. Yes and change rules on the fly. They’ll watch you do the work and then lie and say that you didn’t do it v

[@Grungefan2018]

Yes the supervisor is the ring leader and she LOVES having everyone fight for her favor. It’s actually nauseating

[@jackieguardame6913]

Everything you said is true. It's very important to stop being afraid of your toxic boss. Perform well and record everything.

[@mw7882]

Notes: 1. Deliver results, keep them informed, and document. 2. Don't sink to their level. It contradicts your values. 3. Stop being afraid but do not confront them. 4. Don't complain to coworkers about your boss. Your comments will get back to your manager. 5. Stop blaming yourself. It is not your fault. 6. Stop expecting them to change and giving them constructive feedback. 7. Learn to stop caring, no amount of effort will make them change. 8. Grey rock, become unresponsive, short, and factual. 9. Take charge of your career and well being.

[@bluehorseshoe444]

Gotta disagree with the "do not confront them" one... if you're being abused and harassed by your boss, start documenting what they're doing and file formal complaints with HR... forget that noise about quitting... quitting looks bad on your resume... I made that mistake and wish I had called out my boss who was harassing me (and the other black guy on the team btw). Once you've formally logged complaints, you're building evidence of workplace harassment which is ILLEGAL... start using phrases like "what you're doing is a crime" and see how things change.

[@iamlawrenceelliott]

Bravo 🙌

[@buicklincoln]

You HAVE to confront the toxic boss. They are simply the playground bully who picks on you until they fight back. It's not easy, but if they get in your face and yell...yell back.

[@johnpastore7685]

Well said, but sometimes, you stand up for yourself. Also, is it worth going through all this? Maybe, yes, or no,. That is up to the person. If no, look for another job.

[@johnpastore7685]

@@bluehorseshoe444 yes, HR will do something. It happened to me, a few times. I had to state my claim. Yes, there care about their company, but if you have strong evidence, about real bad job absue, HR will take you seriously.

[@camrenwick]

I've been working 16 years for a toxic boss. I was a dedicated and loyal employee. Now forced to retire and not even a word of goodbye or gratitude. I'm just upset that this toxic boss gets away with it and continues to be toxic and narcissistic.

[@ruchikachauhan9697]

I walked out of a role yesterday without a backup plan. He wasn’t a micromanager on a daily basis but had every other trait of a toxic manager. I lasted 3 months in that role and the damage my confidence and self esteem had been exponential. It’s been as my first time dealing with someone like this. The damage they can do is insane

[@DuygununDunyas]

Toxic bosses need some KARMA

[@myemmotion]

They do!

[@LFMA7]

Eventually! What you sow you will reap. ❤

[@KittenBowl1]

They usually get karma back 10x worse of what they have done in my 20+ years of experience. It’s how this world works; what goes around comes around.

[@blackmewtwo3569]

They do it’s called revenue drop and the landlord is asking for more money to keep the lights on but toxic workplace has a hard time retaining thier customers because the service is always shitty unless the customer is lucky enough to find the good employee but even those employees days are numbered and once they’re gone customers are stuck to deal with everyone else which nine times out of ten they just go to a different store and find another good employee what toxic workplace fail to realize is that it’s not always about money it’s about service

[@lastsouljastanding8023]

They are always depressed, mine just quit and I bought champagne to Feast

[@lblifetips1539]

Yes, you are speaking facts. I was pushed to leave my job and even bullied the last 6 months I was in that toxic company. HR was aware and they did not fix it. I was placed on antidepressants after I had two panic attacks. Believe me, is not worth it. You won't win, leave with your chin up and knowing that you placed your wellbeing first. You will find something much better.

[@bluehorseshoe444]

Get a lawyer next time... file formal complains with HR and start building evidence... they're an old saying "talk is cheap until you get a lawyer"

[@KleWdSide]

Thankfully, they eventually get their comeuppance.

[@rosbifle413]

I was abused as a kid, when a toxic boss tries to bring me down I actually enjoy the conflict. Without knowing it my parents gave me so much practice at dealing with self centeted toxic people. Thanks traumatic childhood :) Top tip, make it work for you. If someone attacks you, it means you're doing things right. If you are invisible it means you're not moving forward.

[@Bigtexdraw]

crazy how that abuse ends up helping you later in life

[@mrlogic8956]

@@Bigtexdraw People tend to become stronger when they go trough pain.

[@anuska2582]

You go for it 😉

[@johnpastore7685]

Thank you, something must be said and done.

[@jonsimmons4150]

@john P 100%

[@user-eo7gl4yq2u]

I'm currently in a job for 3 months and already seen red flags. Got into a meeting with my managers. Currently working my way out of this job.

[@macey74]

I have had it for every single one of my seven jobs over a period of 29 years. They are everywhere. Or if you start a new job and all is ok, your good boss leaves and a new but awful one joins to take their place.

[@camille3083]

It’s even worse now because the world has romanticized narcissist, socios and psychopaths. Shows like Game of thrones, House of Dragon and this new Hunger games have people believing that if you act like a cold backstabbing sociopath you will rise to the top. You may rise to the top but your turn over will be high.

[@obgfoster]

I kept my mouth shut for years, until my boss started gaslighting me. I only had to scratch the surface to find she was toxic to others as well, and that the supervisors who reported to her were also toxic. It became kind of a sport once we discovered each other, and yes, it did bite me in the *ss. It was validating, though. I really needed to know it wasn't just my perception. I'd never experienced a covert narcissist / covert bully before, so I had no idea what I was dealing with. A boss can be a bully without raising his/her voice!

[@myemmotion]

Absolutely! I am actually working on the video about a gaslighting boss, it's incredible how difficult it is to get a proof on being gaslighted. They always cover up their tracks and it's a relatively slow process to continue destroying an employee's self-confidence.

[@anitaknight3915]

I'm going through the exact same thing where I work. It's a lot of narcissistic manipulative gaslighting abuse. It's all about image, power, and control with these types. I needed that validation too to confirm my gut instincts were true. I understand what you mean.

[@myemmotion]

@@anitaknight3915 It’s incredibly difficult going through such times. A breaking point is usually realizing what is going on and identifying that gaslighting/manupulation. Hope you manage to get out of there soon!

[@anitaknight3915]

@@myemmotion yeah the point of realizing all the manipulation and gaslighting has been my breaking point. It just gives me further confirmation of leaving. Haven't found the right opportunity yet. Do you have specific guidance on how to best leave/quit the job? I am concerned of them giving a bad reference or trying to escalate the harrassment bullying when you send them them the notice of resignation. I understand it's a toxic no win situation with these covert narcs and to just leave, but I'm unsure how to best answer them when they bully you if they question why you are leaving/offer exit interview. I don't want to lower myself to their toxic level but I also would feel fake if I just say I'm leaving for an opportunity and not share at all how I've been treated. I don't even think it's worth it to report to HR because they are toxic manipulator and CEO right person unless I report it to corporate after I am gone.

[@tericarson5854]

I work at a flower shop run by a married couple. The wife is a manipulative "know it all" gaslighter. The husband makes excuses and enables her while trying to smooth things over. The workspace is a hoarder's dream and we're not allowed to organize or throw away anything. It's a pigsty physically and mentally. I've dealt with it for twelve years and am finally working on an exit plan to take place in the near future.

[@storyvi9530]

Sarcasm helped me. I respond in my Alexa voice with "Thank you for your feedback, I shall take it into great consideration. I'm really glad we had this conversation. You have motivated me to do better. Thank you for being so professional" Should have seen her face. LOL. They expect perfect robots? Ok, perfect patronising robot coming up.

[@AngellicaGabriellaHamilton]

😂😂😂

[@marcusj97]

Another thing you'll learn is that HR isn't there for you. They are there for the bosses and the company. I got a promotion at the hands of my bosses supervisor. My boss didn't like it as our relationship has never been good. He made my job hell. Empowering my direct reports over me, depowering me, defending other coworkers bad treatment towards me. Complete narcissist and gaslighter. He will take your complaint about his bad behavior and others and make it your fault. It's sad companies have people like this running their business and don't care enough about you to help you.

[@Erik-the-Southern-Viking]

Spot-on Marcus. HR are the lowest form of life within the Corporate Structure. They protect the Psychopaths.

[@SuperCastilloe]

This happens more often than we think and more often than most employed individuals will admit. Such experiences can be very debilitating and leave you with PTSD symptoms many years afterwards. Often times it makes you question your mental sanilty... Thank you for so bluntly putting realistic content out there and stay blessed.

[@LeahIsHereNow]

Debilitating? I’ve never give anybody enough power to get under my skin that much in a work environment. The last place I worked with so toxic, it might as well have been run by a crazed pack of leaderless wolves, but I realize they were the problem. They certainly didn’t like to be called out. That’s why I do it as often as possible. 🙂

[@tractorgirl8124]

I have bad anxiety and ptsd from work place bullying it’s horrible 😢

[@KleWdSide]

It's because people eventually find something else & move on. I think most don't want to bother w/ the headaches by getting HR or attorneys involved. That's why bullying bosses take a while before they finally get their comeuppance (which they eventually do).

[@shandytown7019]

@@LeahIsHereNowI'm not sure where you are in your career. I've been in the workforce for going on 30 years and until this year had never experienced a truly toxic, narcissistic boss. I had experienced a&$hole bosses before, but they were blatant and obvious, and because I was young and hungry, I had no problem simply moving on to the next, higher paying thing. Heck, one time when I finished a contract, I walked out with 3 of my a$$hole manager's employees in tow. He had been telling them they'd never be able to get employed anywhere else because they sucked at their jobs... it was just a tactic to keep them and at low rates. I spent my time letting them know they were good at what they did, and brought them with me when I left. They are all now high performers with great careers. But with this last job, it crept up on me and was much more stealth and narcissistic in nature. My company had a great culture when I arrived, but that has now flipped, so it was shocking. It was a blow to my ego when they started to force me out, and I'm no longer young and hungry and was hoping to stay at this place for the long term, so it's really hard! Count yourself lucky if you haven't experienced this yet, but don't think for a second it couldn't happen to you at some point, and be careful!

[@tigisttibebu1654]

Learn to stop caring is what i take most,all the messages are amazing ..

[@emmsummer7811]

I wish I saw this 2 years ago would've saved me so much trouble, tears and health.Good content!

[@muizzkhan2426]

Same.

[@myemmotion]

I am sorry to hear that you've had to go through that. But you know it's part of a learning process, as I said, try your best in taking it as a gift because now you know how to manage these work situations!

[@myemmotion]

@@muizzkhan2426 Good luck at your new job! :)

[@huangjinwei3755]

Same i cried almost every 2 to 3 mths n countless sleepless night for 4 yrs. Obviously she is targeting on me as my colleague if do anything wrong... she will not scold them but me.

[@LadyJpraise2024unbound]

I made the mistake of believing I have co- workers I can trust. I am so disgruntled that I find security in only 2 co-workers who feel the same, but I wonder if they are tellling others or even the boss???

[@reedrts1]

So many tears I have cried on your virtual shoulder. Thank you so much for being there for me. I would not be where I am now without your help.

[@myemmotion]

You are so welcome, Marie! You can't believe how happy I am for you and for having been able to contribute to it at least a little bit. Hope this past birthday weekend was wonderful! Stay awesome! :)

[@BigDust200]

Shalom! Thank you for this video. I am going through this right now with three managers ( one male, two female). One employee who used to "have my back" has now turned on me. The managers are trying to put enough pressure on me that I will quit my job. I cannot leave right now.

[@Diranot]

I am currently dealing with all these things. I've told my coworker i wont stoop to their level. We continue to work hard and do what they ask without complaining and i feel like it makes my boss more angry because he cant get a reactiion out of me. At the end of the day, i will always do everything in my power to help the company even if they dont help me succeed. i know who i am.

[@katharina...]

I complained today to my department manager about my line manager, and I feel awful about this. My line manager is so very subtle at putting people down, jeopardising our work, making us look incompetent, small and stupid by withholding vital information and documentation. She can be so sweet, and so invisibly vicious. I was listening to myself talking to my dep manager and I kept thinking: you are sounding ridiculous, this is the example you're going with? My manager was sceptical and defended my line manager. I wish I hadn't said anything. Dang it, why do we always have to learn things the hard way? 😔 At the same time, he supported me in my desire to move departments. He said he would rather I'd stayed but then he also said that if I really needed to leave he would facilitate this if I promised to help him transition a new person into my role. I know he will deliver on this promise, and I will help him out as much as I can. I just wish I never said anything about that horrible line manager to him. Thank you for helping me stay sane through all this, Marat.

[@darkmercyiceheart]

This video should have 1 millions views.

[@myemmotion]

That is really kind of you! I hope you manage to get out of this toxic situation very soon. Keep me updated on how thing go!

[@michaelmclaughlin2378]

I told a work friend who was on a salary how much I earned in overtime and she went straight to the boss. At the end of the day her hourly rate is higher than mine and I'm sacrificing my personal life for the OT yet she felt heart done by 😢 Never talk about wage in work!

[@desertdweller8374]

My daughter is dealing with a toxic boss and environment right now. I shared this with her. It's beautiful how you explain it all so clearly because when you in the thick of it, it's so hard to focus on facts and not the injustice - the emotional side. Thank you for your gentle way of explaining that they are not to blame. People seem to find meek prey and feel they can abuse them. This was an excellent video.

[@johnpastore7685]

I know. I hate that. For some reason it happens to me. But, these people realize, I do not tolerate that. You can push me so far. Then, I come out in full force

[@marybassit8246]

Number 4 is so true. This recent happened to me. Never again I will tell a co worker anything.. I don’t trust anyone..

[@CeeVee714]

Me too! I keep to myself.

[@DesignsByDena]

just small talk...nothing deeper than the surface !!! They are not your friend...

[@jam-se8yq]

Just one more thing. I don't know how to stop caring about my toxic boss. I feel like I am too sensitive :( I hate it :(

[@Happiness379]

Are you an HSP like myself?

[@jam-se8yq]

@@Happiness379 according to psychological tests - no but I believe I am very close to. I don't deal well with stressful situations and I take many things too personal, while other people don't care I always remember what someone said or did. I also feel other people mood very well and I have rich inner life in my mind etc :)

[@zaiks0105]

@@jam-se8yq Tell yourself, the more sensitive you are, the more it works against you. So either stop caring or you know it be worse. Tell yourself which route you prefer?

[@firdausismail3020]

I quitted my job before I find a new job. It's tough when opportunities are limited but rebuilding my self esteem was also time consuming so I guess it wasn't wasted. I'm fine now, ready for work.

[@taurahelms3068]

This is right on time for me. You are the most real with the truth about toxicity. I just started this job in October. Everyone keeps telling me because it is Federal and that I'm hitting my 17th year in January to keep hanging in there. I watched another of your videos two hours ago that empowered me to put together a resume and to start looking. I'll be 43 in January. I desire peace in my life.

[@BIG2hats]

That’s it!! Plenty of opportunity out there!

[@LydiaQ17]

When the student is ready, the teacher comes. This is exactly what I needed because I have a toxic colleague. Thanks for the tips and for sharing this with us. I would just add that in my case, it is important to get rid of fear and, above all, to constantly remind myself that I am capable of doing work as well as anyone. I believe he is afraid of me and my knowledge.

[@myemmotion]

You are very welcome! Best of luck!

[@laurab9518]

Boss is annoyed that I’m too smart for the job. When he sees me say something intelligent I see the nasty expression in his face. Then he put me down and asked me if I was smart. What am I supposed to say no?!

[@LadyJpraise2024unbound]

I want to leave my job! I do not know which direction to GO yet??? Which career to change to or just another location until? Pray 4 me. It has always been a culture of toxicity that is tolerated from the very top and with the association, which isn't a union.

[@redlath]

"don't sink to their behavior" very good advice... managers back each other up, then they will always make you look bad, hence, just ignore them, find a new place and at the end just slap them in the face with courtesy: especially when you are younger it's satisfying to tell them they are rotting there while you already got at their same level of experience... the notion of fear is real then for them hahaha.

[@gcsoulsurfer]

I called in sick today, because my Boss treated me like crap all day yesterday. He panics and then puts it on me. By the end of the day i just didnt care anymore and actually thought getting fired would be not so bad. Today I left him in a situation that he wont forget. Today he needed me. Im leaving soon anyway and rarely call in sick. So will see what happens tomorrow.

[@Happiness379]

Any update?

[@gcsoulsurfer]

.@@Happiness379 He wanted my Doctors certificate which i had. He kept asking me during the day if i was ok. Im pretty sure he got the message though, He's not stupid. But yes, you can play the sick card, but not too often. Btw, he has been good to me ever since.

[@Happiness379]

@@gcsoulsurfer thanks for your reply. Looks like he’s getting the hint now. I’m glad he’s treating you better now.

[@shellylindahl7030]

This is BY FAR the BEST advice I have found so far!! Thank you so much! Everyone out there saying that you should tell your boss that you take responsibility for the breakdown in the professional relationship has possibly not actually dealt with an abuser. Abusers look for your weaknesses and capitalize on them. If you try to be humble and “go under” them, you take the risk of that backfiring on you and incurring even more abuse. Finally! Advice that is actually empowering!! 💪🏻

[@ttvmikrowave]

Seriously. I can't begin to name drop which government companies I've worked for as I also can't begin to name my PMs with their linkedin profiles for full display. But this video helped a lot. Early in my career I used to think I can solve and help toxic management be less toxic simply because I embrace a Servant-Leader Mentality thanks to my parents, my community, and how I was raised. However, after watching this video it looks like I can't assist them at all. In fact, it's funny because I remember one boss in particular when I was working for the Department of Homeland Security I recall not being able to login timely (while working remote) because of a city-wide power outage. When the power tripped? So did every electronic in my home such as my alarm clock, and my charging station. By the time I woke up it was an hour past my original start time. After charging my phone I noticed I had a voicemail. Guess who called? My boss expressing empathy which made me think "his toxic behavior" was caused by being overworked as I've never seen this side of him. Fast forward a month later? The toxicity continued. The end result? I got terminated for reasons outside of my control. Again, this video was very helpful.

[@sons1869]

🤮

[@crimsonwring2723]

Quite a few of us in my industry, having worked at a few different companies, have come to the conclusion that the entire industry has a culture of promoting people to managers who are toxic because they “get things done” AND they’ll tow the line. It’s an industry cultural issue many of us either stay trapped in because we love the work…or are figuring out how to jump to a new career altogether.

[@feliciahamilton5246]

Thanks. You said every single thing that I am experiencing to the T, and you gave me understanding and the most realistic approach to manage.

[@myemmotion]

You are very welcome!

[@luintech7496]

You've got this

[@feliciahamilton5246]

@EMMOTION by Marat I got out of that department and moved into another department. My problem is I am left with anxiety, and doubts in myself. I feel I have lost myself from the toxic abuse.

[@billie44]

This happen to me At a big law firm I got a new job At a different law firm My mistake was telling the old hr what happen to me They found me and bad mouthed got me fired 10 years job to job I had to leave town and start over. Now life is great again

[@NodictatorsinKZ]

This is very good. Actually I have encountered this situation now and was scrutinized for everything I do. I did not watch your video until now, but looking at your advises I can say that they work. I completely distanced myself from the toxic person in the team and focused on my performance and it worked. Actions speak louder than words and decency always prevails. My toxic boss actually wanted to get rid of me and feels like I am a threat. She used all the tactics you mentioned, but it did not work. I think the key here is to stay resilient, if it becomes unbearable, just go to another job. There is always a way.

[@myemmotion]

I am so glad it’s been functioning for you. As soon as you get less and less emotionally involved, you get to the turning point and you liberate yourself from a lot of negative pressure and negative energy.

[@imjustaturtle641]

I literally made the decision today to start looking for a new job. My job is remote, and it’s been almost 6 months. At first it was great, but it has become very toxic and unsafe. My boss yelled/cussed at two of my co-workers about being “unprofessional” in a teams chat and made them both cry. Then they started micromanaging. Example they saw me and a coworker on a call on teams and told us to get back to work. I was actually helping them learn something, but they were immediately aggressive. They’re an ex-Marine and they seem to be really dead set about making this job like the military. Thank you for these tips, I know this is the right decision for me. Life is too short.

[@scandiclinda]

Thank you so much for this! Here in Norway bosses can't fire you "just like that", so what they do instead is to squeeze you out by using tricks like micro- managing, gazlighting, passive aggression and bringing their toxic energy with them to your office or to your precense.

[@jonsimmons4150]

Make their home lives disagreable. Everyone lives somewhere, everyone commutes by one method or another to work. Ex. I had a shitty bullyboy manager once, he used to bicyle to work, sports bike, lycra, etc, i knew where he lived thru small talk , and the only road home was through a long country lane, with big hills.. When he cycled off i left a while later, overtook in my car, then out of view 1km away, i threw down carpet tacks on the cycle path. He couldnt understand why whenever it was bad weather, really hot, he always got punctures, or when he went to unlock his bicycle, the lock was jammed, or bolts were loose, or a buckled wheel, or chain snapped on the way home. Only small victories, but i did chuckle :-) that on top of other work-related "efforts" i did enjoy ot.

[@Fauskoable]

@@jonsimmons4150 that is psychotic…

[@KittenBowl1]

You guys need power harassment laws. In where I live people sue companies for such poor treatment and abuse of power, and employees actually win.

[@KittenBowl1]

@@jonsimmons4150That’s too much. I mean why waste such energies, your energy is better spent on looking for another job. And it’s something you shouldn’t be doing. You could also risk getting caught and your actions are actually criminal. You could go to jail for that. Not wise.

[@jonathansimmons5353]

​@@Fauskoablefuck around find out.

[@Melva-Tjong]

This is true, you can’t trust your colleagues. You hit the nail on the head.

[@vidaesmaeili6144]

I had a meeting with a top manager, after meeting my manager asked me what you said in that meeting. I just keep quiet for afew seconds trying to find something to tell with less confidentiality. He said Ok, you don't have to tell me, but I don't know you, and from that moment, he has got aggressive and disrespectful to me.

[@arnbo88]

While employed with the Coca-Cola Company, I had a Jehovah's Witness manager that me his personal conversion project. I learned methods in which to avoid him: I would start at 5:00 and he would routinely arrive at 7:58. At 7:55 I would go for a morning coffee break during which he would annoy everyone in the room. When I would get back at 8:15 at which time he had settled down on his office pc. At 9:00 he would go to a meeting. By 10:00 he'd come back which would be first daily contact. At 11:00 lunch. At 14:00 I would go home having spent less than half my shift dealing with this nut. I did this daily for 8 months until someone else noticed the pattern and dobbed me in. I stayed at Coca-Cola for 10 years because the pay was outstanding. I learned coping mechanisms and tried not to take things personally since most middle managers were dicks. Each had a personal scapegoat and a sycophant.

[@banana9106]

Yeah, really shouldn't try to convert your workforce, everyone is there just for the pay cheque.

[@saharasugule2637]

I'm glad I found your videos today because today I had the hardest day at work since my favorite nurse manager was sent to different building. I just can't stand my temporarily nurse manager not only she's a rude person, but also very lazy one. I'm more upset about how my head nurse (DNS) thinks that she's a good person and care about the residents. She's far being a good nurse. In fact, she's the worse human being I have ever met in my entire life especially labeled her as a head nurse..

[@myemmotion]

It's a shame that your manager has been sent to a different building and I hope the current head nurse is there temporarily. In any case, try to remain professional and don't show her anything you might feel about her. How long is she going to be your manager for? If she becomes your permanent manager things might become more complicated.

[@MCab2000]

I was in a toxic work environment over a decade ago. Everything you have said is spot on. I wish I heard this advice at that time. Keep up the great work!

[@MyThoughtzAndOpinionz]

I made the mistake of complaining to my coworker about my boss, I thought he my close friends. I realize that he was going into the boss’s office, and telling him everything that I was saying. 😑

[@Sugarlips123]

Coworkers are NOt friends never confide in a coworker.

[@breej3055]

The universe is pointing me to these videos for a reason. I am taking notes.

[@gailtolsma6354]

Thank you so much for this! I am struggling with major depression and burnout because of my boss. I am looking for new job, but appreciate the "stop caring and don't be afraid" until I am able to leave

[@alwaysgrateful7156]

“Unless you have huge willpower” that’s right by the grace of god🙏🏽☺️💕 great video, I agree with everything you mentioned here!

[@myemmotion]

Thank you so much! And it’s very true indeed, it’s so complicated to maintain a clear mind after being under toxic management for a long time.

[@myemmotion]

Hope you manage to get out of there very soon, if you haven’t yet. Thanks a lot for stopping by and for your kind feedback :)

[@amysimmons805]

I smiled when he said this too. I clearly didn't have willpower because it was a living hell for me until they fired me

[@myemmotion]

@@amysimmons805 I am really sorry to hear that!

[@redlath]

ahh yes, confronting doesn't help, especially facing older people: the know it all better guy. I got in this situation after i got in an accident; i was afraid of the job and the appraisal from colleagues. My boss started to mistreat me; i kept a low profile, tried to fix things up, regained my confidence... nothing happened... I knew i had to move on, so I quietly found a much better job and on my way out I shouted the guy how wrong he was and who the FFF he thought he was... my time and knowledge was in the wrong place so byyyyye

[@saffrynalleyne2292]

Every company ive ever been at has been filled with lazy bosses an managers im trying my best to accept the reality the world is so fake sometimes thnful for the real ppl i met at work.

[@Amesimpao]

This really helps... I'm in this situation right now, I can't resign cuz I have debts to pay. So I'll try your advices... I'll update if what will happen. Wish me luck

[@lucyslivingroom5087]

Great survival kit. I wish I knew this to apply on my former supervisor

[@myemmotion]

Thank you so much!

[@lii1Il]

Today the second day early. I quit. I was very professional. They were very disrespectful. They asked me to stay but I knew they would continue to disrespect me.

[@noldi123]

you have to detach your emotions.

[@myemmotion]

Yes, even though that's so complicated to do. But Grey Rock works!

[@nyxvolture1520]

It’s important to note HR can be aligned with your company’s best interests- not those of the employee. Escalating issues to them seems like for me has fallen on “deaf” ears.

[@michelledilello4968]

Such brilliant advice delivered so clearly and eloquently. Thank you. My career suffered 2 years ago when I went through this. They are everywhere so I’m encouraging my own teenage son ( and later on the other two younger sons) to run their own business / company when they grow up to avoid having to deal with narcissistic bosses throughout their lives. I have since educated myself, my experience nearly broke me and I have some PTSD 2+ years later, they want to destroy you and want you to fail, even at the organisation’s expense IMO.

[@Melissakhan_artwork]

Thank you for this.. currently in a toxic job.. it's only been a month, yesterday i felt so emotional when i was picked on by my boss,she would always find fault and would mostly shout at me and say I'm no good

[@douglassmith215]

Thank you so much for this. I’ve spent whole journey home crying after passive aggressive texts/emails/phone calls. Completely unreasonable behaviour. It’s so hard not to have an emotional reaction and self blame is too easy. I’ve left it too long and need to work on my self confidence. Thank you for your advice.

[@jedimaster708]

Here's the kicker...if you go grey rock on a boss who has officially decided, you're 'it', they will be relentless in getting a reaction from you, and step up the abuse until you reach your ultimate breaking point. I work in a small company where there are only five other people including myself. And the toxic boss absolutely LOVES them! Meanwhile, every day he finds fault with me, and I constantly grey rock him, but as he has nobody else to turn to, he keeps hitting me up for a fix! I'm interviewing like crazy, but, post pandemic, when you have over a hundred people applying to one job, even ones in your field, not easy getting out! The other day, he publicly humiliated me with a nasty comment, and, as I know he's narcissistic, the smart money was on him prolonging the agony the following day...or not saying a word, going into total denial! He chose the latter option, and I iced him for the entire shift. But he tricks me into communicating by using other staff members and it's not like I can't talk to them! But, no reaction can be perceived that you are letting them get away with their behaviour by not saying something, and, fighting your corner by calling them on their lack of professionalism gives them the reaction they want! It's win/win...for the toxic boss!

[@HurricaneCamille-us6mp]

Absolutely!

[@lonihutchison5200]

Wow this is so accurate. I am experiencing this now. The gaslighting, mistrust, etc. This has given me the confirmation I was seeking. Thank you.

[@bokccraigatron007]

If someone is tryna set you back in life means they playing with fire. That’s how I see it 💯

[@zaiks0105]

Grey Rock ... I'll take a note of it. Be unresponsive as if you are a rock .... limit interactions, factual and short, no emotional

[@vikki8699]

This was so helpful. I was forever in catch 22 situatioms and they even persisted with their behaviour after I was given new line management. So I walked.

[@myemmotion]

And you did the right thing. First trying possible options available but if it's not working not, you can't end up living an unnecessary stress and anxiety. Hope you find a nice and healthy environment to work at very soon!

[@alaukikkjeevan1920]

But why should we leave, we should make them leave as they are causing toxicity at work place

[@dennismclaurin1487]

That's right. The wicked in charge are the ones who need to be rid of

[@juliasmithe]

Agreed…that puts the burden back on those being abused rather than the perpetrators

[@digafox]

It's not so much about what is tight as it is survival. Yes they are toxic but toxic bosses can often flourish in these environments. Its about keeping the exit option open just in case forcing then out doesn't work as well as you hoped. Try this what do you do if you can't force them out they are dug in too well, and now you can't leave because because your windows of opportunity closed now your stuck. Nothing wrong with having an escape plan so your not cornered.

[@Jennifer-nz2ss]

Been "dealing" with one for 16 yrs!! Its hell

[@Oceloteater]

Actually perfect advice. I've just left my job (for a new one) for this very reason and everything you said is exactly what I needed to hear 6 months ago...

[@devinepegasus5532]

Document everything and take them to court for pain and suffering!

[@nadaarif5399]

You’re amazing; I honestly wanted to cry after watching this video, the toxicity has been so intense at work. This is excellent advice. I can’t thank you enough for posting this. I’m going through unimaginable hell with a new boss who is extremely toxic, and I’ve already implemented some of what you mentioned and the strategies are so effective. I look forward to implementing all the other tips you’ve shared! Bless your heart and thank you 💝

[@rahabnyaguthii1590]

You have no idea how helpful this video is to people like me who are in toxic work environments. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[@Goodhello369]

Problem is sometimes people can go to an even worse environment. Reco people choose battle’s wisely. And like Marat said just stop caring when that happens. But beware it could be worse. Or dare i say, maybe look at self. Not victim blaming but it is essential for us to take inventory. Work is going to have frustrations even in good companies.

[@kimkeller8126]

Why is it that it’s ALWAYS the persons who is being bullied is the one who has to leave? I’m being bullied at my work place and I’m not their first victim. Pretty soon there will not be anyone left all because of one person!!!

[@banana9106]

Eventually HR will figure what is going on, the trouble is that it takes years. I worked in a toxic workplace where a supervisor and manager made multiple people's lives a misery. The staff turnover in their department was horrendous, most people didn't last a year. Finally, HR sent in a mole wearing a recording device to gather the evidence that they needed to fire the manager and the supervisor didn't last too long either. The ex managers there helped to break up my marriage. But I got revenge on them. See both had daughters that were right tearaways and they recorded it all on social media. Their daughters both drank heavily and used illegal substances. One was training to be a teacher, so all it took was screen shots of her social media and a letter claiming that she had tried to sell drugs to my child and that was 3 years of a teaching degree down the drain. The other, I watched. She was driving under the influence of alcohol, so when I saw her swerve the car on to her father's driveway and stagger out of the car, I called the police in the guise of a concerned neighbour. Police showed up 10 minutes later. One put his hand on the car bonnet and nodded to the other, they started banging on the front door. My boss appeared, dishevelled and in his pyjamas. Police went in and 10 minutes later came out with his daughter in handcuffs and him protesting loudly. Turned out she had been driving 3 times over the limit and it was splashed all over the local papers. Do I feel bad for taking my revenge on their daughters? NO Because they were just as bad as their parents and thought that they could get away with anything. Would you really want a teacher that was doing drugs every weekend and stupid enough to record it on social media teaching your kids? And the drink driver, if she had killed someone, how many more lives other than her own would she have wrecked?

[@kimkeller8126]

@@banana9106 Yes 🙌 sweet revenge😀. Well, you know what the old saying is “what goes around comes around” sounds like he got what was coming to him. Sweet karma, you have to love that. 👍🏻

[@banana9106]

@@kimkeller8126 I am planning to ring him one day and let him know who called the police. His daughter now has a son that must be about 8 years old and a few months back she put on her socials that she had been clean and sober for a year now, from the sort of boss he was, I am not surprised that she has had addiction issues.

[@UntilxThexSunxDies]

Thanks for the video. The restaurant I worked at sent home two managers for a week. Two coworkers walked out. Than I was sent home for a week with no cause. That was crazy.

[@myemmotion]

What a chaos indeed. Is this because the business is declining or you have no idea what is going on?

[@Unkuuu]

Looking for a new job almost immediately gives one hope and a focus on oneself and the future. Bring focus back to move forward and not how you’ve been mishandled at work. You can still deal with them (in court, HR, abrupt quit) but your life is first.

[@JimmyJaxJellyStax]

The reality is working towards an eventual escape plan when most toxic bosses are definately not changing anytime soon. Might develop more respect in time, but the energy remains incompatible and draining.

[@SwimminWitDaFishies]

Can you discuss what a Hostile Work Environment is? And why are toxic managers not removed from their jobs? Why is the burden of a new job search on the good worker who is being demoralized by a toxic jerk of a boss?

[@Dzanarika1]

They are permitted to behave like that to scare people into total obedience. This is not a coincidence that almost every job nowdays have bossess who are maniacs. They are permitted to do just that from their top management!

[@amysimmons805]

I will try using grey rock and would love to learn more about it. Will just stick to your advice of ignoring all the negative and not reacting.

[@myemmotion]

Go for it! And I will try making a more detailed video on it. Thanks a lot for stopping by!

[@huangjinwei3755]

Same Amy ... i also trying !!!

[@mdhassanullah502]

I'm currently in same situation..My manager thinks he can destroy my career but I'll not let him do that..wherever I'll fail I will correct my mistake and will fight back..Finding other job is not solution..every corporate places have same shit

[@bumble8588]

This is the best advice ever - but sooooo hard to do. I will try to do this. But evil is evil and powerful. I always pray that karma comes double fold to them.

[@williamanderson8932]

Yes you are correct they are evil.

[@hrithikzgirl83]

Great video! I have a toxic coworker and a pushover boss who it seems like the coworker controls. I agree with all your steps but I do think making the boss aware of the coworker’s behavior is important. If nothing happened then start looking for a new job but I do think making the boss aware of the situation is important.

[@lilamayi1289]

This is the exact video and information I've been searching for for the past year. THANK YOU. Like a light on the dark of the quiet hell I've been going through working under a narcissist. Thank you for your wisdom and kind and helpful words.

[@ilciavo]

Thank you! As you suggested I kept record of our interactions. I presented my resignation on Monday, and when my boss asked for reasons I simply said “one year ago I presented a list with suggestions to improve our environment, and they were ignored”, his answer was: “ok”.

[@jagritiholford3713]

Yes, most of the time in almost all Companies, found that one character who would gossip and go and present my thoughts in a very twisted manner. And, it will result in worse situation.

[@xoejo503]

This was really good. My over my toxic work environment has been off the charts and this advice helped a lot and let me know I'm not crazy

[@diandrasmidt894]

This is difficult because my manager is dating the owner of the company. I'm really at a point where I feel like I'm too stupid to do the work correctly and I'm useless.

[@Keith-wb2nn]

I worked in the trucking industry for 3 years as a safety manager.... It was hell on earth from the truckers all the way up to my terminal manager... Sucks

[@jclgts10]

I am from Brazil and worked in the US for 15 years. Never been late for a second. Ended up coming back to my country . I may not have the green bills any longer but I have less stress. The work environment in the US is absolutelly awful. This people is raised to be what they are : war dogs

[@sherrip5900]

Thank you so much... your whole video nailed this!... I never imagined being in such a position, but it's real and i'm experiencing it now. Your video has helped me to not only understand this situation better, but also how to step up and handle it with grace...

[@PopeCop]

I'm dealing with a situation like this at work currently, and this is very eye opening. Thank you so much!

[@jmbal925]

I am DESPERATE! My boss is an ASS kisser with her superiors . She Bullies people under her just to look good with her boss who knows she’s humiliating us . I work for the government. It’s hard to move around or move up. This video made me feel a little better

[@Raymondtembo]

Yeah,the more I distance myself from her the more she created more reasons to get in my face the pettiest and most dramatic was she demanded to be greeted after she cleary signaled to be along

[@INFJparadox]

This is spot on for me and what I am dealing with right now. Why do they get away with this? I greatly appreciate your advice and exactly what I needed today. Thank you so very much!

[@Keyboardkid81]

You are absolutely right!! I really needed this video.

[@Pbuilder]

I find myself in a challenging situation where the entire team is aware of the toxic behavior exhibited by our boss, as well as our boss's boss. Despite this knowledge, no action has been taken to address the issue.

[@samston]

U hit the nail on the head about the workplace and these school girl managers. They toxic as hell