How To Feel Confident

[@ljmastertroll]

This may be the best confidence building video I've ever seen.

[@Carrie]

Thank you! :D xxx

[@ljmastertroll]

***** Thank you!

[@vickibolland4305]

SAMEEEEEEE

[@hyperfocusworkshop]

Faking it til you make it has changed me in so many ways for the better. I wouldn't be who I am today if I hadn't pretended to be her first.

[@Carrie]

LOVE LOVE LOVE this comment! I'm the same! I created a version of myself that I aspired to be and made it my goal to be her! Obviously it's ever changing but it's so helpful! xxx

[@hyperfocusworkshop]

***** :) It's seriously so helpful. I love it. (By the way, if you're a big sister to your fans, what are you to fans who are older than you? *has been trying to figure this out for weeks*)

[@The1andOnlyCiara]

A friend 💕

[@hyperfocusworkshop]

The1andOnlyCiara Thanks! I like that. :)

[@katiehusband1505]

I read on tumblr a post that goes something like 'confidence isn't making everyone like you, it's about being okay if they don't'. It's about embracing your little quirks and reconciling with the idea that not everyone will like you or what you do. The only person who does have to like what you're doing is you. And most of the time, people aren't paying attention to you anyway, they are busy doing the same internal anxiety thing that you are.

[@Anna13Tonks]

She is SO underrated

[@IslaMcTear]

My biggest advice to anyone looking to gain confidence is to join a drama club/group, you don't need to want to become an actor but putting yourself out there will give you a level of confidence that you won't get anywhere else. Plus it'll help with those pesky group exercises you have to do in school.

[@ang91100]

You really think this would work? I have been thinking about joing a drama group but from the little experience i have with actors they are rather energetic, outgoing people. An introvert would fade away among such a group.

[@ripmyfictionalfriends]

angelika91100 yeah I think she's right. I have only had drama lessons at school and school isn't the best place to act (okay in the school musical group but lessons at school: no). But I got a friend in a drama group, she also joined the school musical. I've seen her perform with both and she's very comfortable with them and they're all really sweet and passionate. They aren't all outgoing, many are introvert really. It just seems like that bc they're a group of people who all know each other. But that shouldn't be a problem bc you could make the group more awesome with your own abilities :)

[@koellekind]

angelika91100 remember, they are mostly faking it, just join in ;o) Also, if the group is well led, there is no possibility for anyone to be fading away.

[@IslaMcTear]

Ahaha it helped for me guys :) I use to be a squirmy awkward kid. Now I'm an only slightly awkward adult. I went to a drama group at a very young age and continued to do so till I was sixteen. The trick is to throw yourself into it and make the most out of it! I know it really helped me growing up right into my adulthood :)

[@rebeccawolf315]

angelika91100 Most of us fake that energetic outgoing-ness because it's almost like a warm up. I'm incredibly introverted and shy but when I go to drama clubs or drama school auditions you'd never know.

[@garyc]

Most artists I've met are emotional, apathetic or damaged individuals. It allows people to feel and fuel their creativity. On one hand I'd love to be totally self-confident and with it...but then i wouldn't be me. x

[@hannahc5822]

I have read 11 books since Christmas I can make good cake I can fit 13 marshmallows in my mouth and say chubby bunny I have an awesome music taste I can make origami flowers and am on my way with dragons I have perfected the art of tea making and I am an excellent hugger *hey since I wrote that pretty sure I've read another 8 books

[@TheNeveFringe]

cheesecake?

[@hannahc5822]

TheNeveFringe waffles

[@emziefull]

What type of music do you listen to? You sound like a really nice person by the way :)

[@hannahc5822]

emziefull aww thank you I like bands mostly like MCR Fall Out Boy, All time Low, Panic at the Disco and I quite like Green day. What music do you like?:)

[@emziefull]

Awesome! I like Green Day too, but I'm more into bands like Nirvana or Foo Fighters.I agree with you though, you do have an awesome music taste! Be proud! :)

[@Katie-zr8oc]

If you can't think of anything good about you, here's a helpful a little list to help you; adventurous affectionate ambitious brave bright broad-minded calm charming compassionate creative decisive determined easygoing faithful frank friendly funny generous gentle hard-working helpful honest humorous imaginative independent intuitive inventive kind loyal patient philosophical placid polite rational reliable resourceful sincere sympathetic thoughtful tough understanding witty

[@Katie-zr8oc]

If you're the opposite of some of those things, that's fine too! For example, I'm not charming or physically affectionate, but that's a-okay.

[@ashleightimmins8222]

I am none of these things.

[@mariannek6735]

Ashleigh Timmins Then maybe you are unique and perhaps inspiering to other people? :)

[@glasshalffull5565]

+Ashleigh Timmins I bet if you asked someone else if you were any of the things on that list they'd have a lot to say

[@ashleightimmins8222]

GlassHalfFull​ my boyfriend would have a lot to say but he's biased! Haha

[@RaeRaeTheQueen]

I faked it until I made it. I was bullied and didn't have any friends in Kindergarten and primary school. I started to act like I was so confident and that I loved myself until it was actually the case and it made me really happy. I am a very happy person now, since I gained this kind of confidence ^^

[@IslaMcTear]

Really happy for you! I hope you continue to feel that level of confidence :)

[@RaeRaeTheQueen]

Isla McTear I hope so, too! I just hope I don't lose it, because I think it'll help me to get somewhere with my life. And I also hope others who struggle and struggled will find their way to confidence, because it is important to feel good about yourself, even if it is fake at the beginning. As Carrie said, it sticks if you do it long enough ^^

[@IslaMcTear]

Hell yeah! Live by that :)

[@jessicatammreads]

This is definitely something I work on all the time! Thank you for your advice! One thing that's helped me a lot, is I've stopped obsessing about what others think. I used to take myself too seriously so if I got made fun of or laughed at i used to think that was just the worst and I'd usually blush and stuff. Nowadays I try to just relax a bit more and not take myself so seriously. Learning to let myself make mistakes has helped a lot. It's definitely made me laugh a lot more and be a lot happier!

[@CaoimheHennessy]

Thank you carrie! I'm not as shy as I used to be, I joined a stage school four years ago and I've made a lot of friends and really enjoy performing! I'd definitely recommend joining a club or activity that allows you to express yourself and have to fun, to anyone who has confidence issues!

[@mollyphillips3624]

I agree. Acting is the only thing I do that makes me feel confident. I can't talk as myself, but I'm very happy to pretend to be someone else and talk. So, when I have to talk to someone as me, I pretend I'm someone else and it helps me feel less nervous.

[@autumncockrell1349]

This video is so true! I started 'faking it' when I was twelve. Girls at dance made me feel worthless and become I'm home schooled, people would automatically think I'm some antisocial weirdo. But, I started to suck it, tried my best and it has paid off. Whenever I talk to a complete stranger or even my best friend, I am much more confident now then I've ever been!

[@allystyles9979]

I have recently started GCSE drama, a choice that I didn't exactly want to take but needed to fill up my option blocks and my mum said it would Help me to be more confident. I am such an introvert and I usually hate just being around large groups of people or having to speak to or meet new people so taking GCSE drama was kind of a nightmare for me. I haven't been loving it so far, but I'm getting there and this has really helped me to think more positively about the whole thing. Once again, thank you Carrie you are an inspiration

[@_reeshu_]

And this is another reason why I adore Carrie's videos. She knows exactly what to say to you when you're going to make excuses to yourself. Thank you, Honorary Big Sis

[@hirasxo]

I love this video, and I love that you highlighted the fact that most people are actually faking it! It's true, it's one of the only ways to get over it - by just forcing yourself into it until it ends up feeling natural. The more you do it, the better you'll be at it!

[@reeryredlove6729]

i agree with your talking to other people tip, I always make a point of trying to make small talk with checkout clerks. I have extreme stage fright and am bad at talking to people i dont know but taking small steps like that really have helped me. And honestly, by just remembering everyone else is also too caught up on how they look and how they're being portrayed, does make me feel less embarrassed and more confident in public. These tips really helped and were something i really needed to hear at this point in my life. Thankyou, Carrie :) x

[@eriicadanell]

this video really made me think about how i view myself and how good/bad my confidence/self esteem is. it's weird because if you ask me to say stuff i like about myself i have a whole list of things but if you ask about things i don't like i can't really think of a lot. i'm pretty sure that isn't common at all between girls my age. but that doesn't mean i have good self esteem or that i'm confident at the moment. my two only friends "left" me about a year ago and i just can't deal with the whole making new friends thing. one year ago i had so much fun and always had someone to talk to about hot guys and good tv series. now i feel lonely and awkward in front of people and for every day i feel more isolated from people. but i still love myself. that's not going to change. sorry, now i'm going to stop feeling sorry for myself, just had to get this off my shoulders. thank you for these videos Carrie, they make me want to try my hardest to get back in the game. thank you x

[@livridley3515]

One of my friends told me today, despite my protests that I am pretty awkward and shy most of the time, that I am "confident when it counts" which, as an aspiring actress, was nice to hear! This video was lovely and very helpful, thanks a bunch Carrie! x

[@KirstyLaura]

There's not many things I could think off but I know that I'm proud to be that friend who's always there giving out support, advice and the ability to make people smile.

[@winniedreesbeimdieke-lee9173]

1. Superb sleeper 2. First class cat stroker 3. Perfect procrastinator 4. Expert exam-sitter 5. Great HP fan

[@jessicaparsons2324]

Actually, you're an admirable procrastinator. You need to work on 1.doing f**k all and 2. pretending you've done loads.

[@winniedreesbeimdieke-lee9173]

I can pretend, just not to the person I share a room with (that's you).

[@Leela5678]

I would write a witty comment in response to this, but I think I'll do it later.

[@winniedreesbeimdieke-lee9173]

Yeah, tomorrow's a great day to do everything.

[@Leela5678]

I agree! I still need to watch TV for several hours first, I just remembered! How could I forget!

[@chickensrneat]

okay so, I've seen countless videos, been to a fair number of meetings and heard so much advice about self confidence and self worth, and I've never, ever found it to have as much as an impact on me as this did. I suffer so much from a lack of confidence. I get anxious about everything I think, say or do. and the fact that I was just able to compose a list of 17 things I actually like about myself has brought me to tears. I've never got past 5. thank you.

[@gracej3633]

As a dancer I've gone out on stage lots of times without feeling nervous, and yet i've cried when i've been told to go and ask someone for a bottle of water! So thank you Carrie, not for giving me confidence, but for giving me the tools to find my own confidence! :) I also want to say that this video has already helped me because i've been watching youtube videos for a while now, but no matter how many opinions or feelings i want to comment on videos, this is the first one where i have actually had the confidence to comment without feeling judged, so thank you for that! xxx

[@randomcactus8872]

Carrie, I know you probably won't see this but I just want to say how much your videos have meant to me. I know you've got hundreds of people writing posts like these every day and I'm just another voice in the crowd, but I couldn't not write something about how much you have inspired and comforted me. As a curly haired writer/actress who loves words and books and is vastly interested in people (not that I ever have the courage to talk to them) I was so overjoyed to find someone out there who was completely rocking all those qualities, because you make me feel like I can do it, that I get through all those days and months where the depression is bad and I'm not sure I want to be around anymore. Your letters to autumn series amazed me, because last year I wrote to Spring. I feel the same about being on stage as myself. Your videos tell me exactly what I need to hear, and I'm so grateful that you exist because today you got me through another day without cutting. Thanks for being there x

[@JL-px5rr]

Thank you so much Carrie!! Whenever I feel a bit nervous I always think of this quote: 'You are enough. You are so enough. It's unbelievable how enough you are'- Sierra Boggess.

[@emilyschettlers]

It's great knowing that even the great Carrie Hope Fletcher gets nervous! I've slowly built up my confidence and I'm at a point right now where I don't think of all the stupid things I've said to people. I also entered college last year and it really boosted my confidence.

[@emmamorris6009]

I am a really unconfident person both standing up in front of people and in social occasions but i absolutely love drama and being anxious always gets in the way. So thank you Carrie this video really helped me.

[@FlameToEmbers]

This video basically changed my life and I just can’t help but watching it over and over again. This is my resolution: starting right now I will stop being afraid to talk to people, I will stop wondering if I am interesting enough every time someone listens to me, I will stop underestimating myself because I want so badly to be as confident as the people I see every day. This voice inside my head has been telling me that I couldn’t be like all those people around me, and that I couldn’t fit anywhere, and God I wish this voice is wrong, and I wish the future will be better. So thank you Carrie for all those advice, this was just what I needed to hear. Now I’m going to listen “I have confidence” from the Sound of Music, and I’m ready to face the world! The things I know I’m good at: -Bakery -Singing -School, learning -Since Christmas, I’ve read 3 books in English, which isn’t my native language -Doing my nails PS: Sorry about my English, I’m French

[@canvas225]

I can say that this actually 100% works. Maybe a-year-or-so ago, Carrie made a video just like this one. And I took it to heart. People ask me why I'm so confident, but I had to start faking it first, tricking my brain into it.

[@ellisrother7329]

How is it you always know EXACTLY what to say to make me feel better?! You are pure magic.

[@michaelrose1172]

I've also struggled with this confidence issue for a very long time even though I've worked at Disney World and spoke before thousands of people every day. Was the master of ceremony at multiple events in my life. I would like to do voiceovers for television and radio. People around me have more confidence about my voice then I do. You are right through if you act confident people can see that and they show you more respect.

[@yasmin4299]

everything you're saying carrie is so so so true and i've actually applied it to myself before and it's worked! i also want to add that if you try to talk to someone and you get rejected or they seem uninterested, don't worry about it because it's not about you. also, if you make some sort of mistake (like you garble up your words or something) just smile, correct yourself, and move on

[@trishafur]

This is what I've been working on, since I've been going to the gym more this year and it's so easy to feel self conscious there. Remembering that everyone is a little nervous working out around other people is super helpful! Xx

[@ORatcliffe]

What you said at the end is literally me! I can easily go on stage as a character and look as confident as ever.. If I was to go up as me I'd be in pieces. It's hard to explain to someone who doesn't get it, as people always say 'how can you not be confident when you're always acting on stage?' Im glad someone else feels the same. I love you, you're my inspiration ❤️

[@leoniemotler574]

I feel like this video is something I need to watch every morning, a bit like saying 5 impossible things before breakfast! I've always been a believer in "Act confident and you will seem confident" but taking your own advice is never the same as when someone else tells it to you. Thank You Carrie :D xxx

[@kennedytaylor4732]

Carrie, I needed this SO badly right now and I didn't even know it. When you were talking about how you, an amazing and successful actress, got nervous at an audition, I teared up. I was literally just about to call and cancel one of the biggest auditions I've ever had because I'm sooooo nervous and terrified, but now I realize if you can do it, I can do it. Thank you for this teeny boost of confidence, I know it will go a long way. I adore you, please keep inspiring others.

[@erinredford6167]

I've re watched this so many time and I've realised that I 'fake it till I make it' as I work in a shop and I seem so confident when in fact I am not I am so self conscious about everything. this is so important to me Carrie xxx

[@juliettemortimer2302]

My mum's calls "fake it until you make it" whistling in the dark and I must say it's helpful if you feeling a bit scared :) I loved this video they are always so perfect xxx

[@m.muehleis6489]

I love the statement "fake it till you make it", but what I love even more is Amy Cuddy's twist on it, "fake it till you become it". Her Ted talk is so inspiring, just like this video!

[@OnlyNeonAngel]

thank you SO much for sharing, during 2014 I decided to be less anxious and more confident because I'd had enough of feeling like crap around other people who seemed to be moving on with life whilst I felt rather 'trapped'. however I noticed that I didn't feel nervous when on stage or acting in front of other people so I took on the "fake it 'til ya make it" approach and STUCK to it. of course, i'm still working on it now, but i've seen such an improvement in my confidence and also- i think that it really shows!! It was honestly such a brilliant decision and I'd encourage others to PLEASE at least try to do the same xx

[@__-tz2yx]

One little trick I've learned with body language: if you're standing/walking and don't know what to do with your hands, hold your wrist behind your back. It helps with posture and decreases fidgeting. And also I can relate to this so much. First of all, most of the confidence I have I got from faking it for quite a while. Also hiding behind a character became familiar over this past week as in one of my education classes during presentations we all have roles we have to play. I'm supposed to be a social jr high student (~6-8th grade). I've found it's a lot easier than I expected because I don't have to worry about saying anything dumb because everyone will just attribute it to the character and not me personally.

[@mcspookee]

I am a gymnast who used to compete for a club team for over 6 years but then I switched to competing for my high school and since I was apparently very good on my team suddenly I was getting interviewed for local newspapers and once I even had to do a phone interview and that was probably the most traumatic experience of my life. This video is super helpful and inspiring though, Carrie, so thank you!

[@elenaslack9976]

I completely agree with all the comments about doing some sort of drama or performing arts qualification at school. Drama sound like your worst nightmare particularly if you think you have confidence issues. It won't make your nervousness disappear but it really does help you in handling those feelings and be able to perform the task you have at hand even when your under pressure. I have a drama GCSC and I still use the learnings I took on from this every single day. I'm not in the arts profession now, I'm 35 and I work for a bank but I still count Drama as one of my most fundamental qualifications that I call upon greatly in my professional life. Thanks for this video Carrie.

[@Mildred_dear]

Coming back to this a year later and it's really making me emotional. I'm in second year at uni and as a student nurse I have to be very confident and talkative. But since I left secondary school my confidence has plummeted and in can't seem to find who I was in my sixth year. I know I must fake it and this has been a great video to show me how

[@AmandaWadsley]

Love this! I can relate to this so much, I found just as I grew older my confidence began to grow, I kinda just felt like I was holding myself back from being unconfident and scared! Then you soon realise, most people worry and feel the same way! I'm still a mess over a lot of stuff, but as you quite rightly said Carrie, you learn to just get on with it anyway! But for the people who feel like they will never get out of this unconfident shy way of living, believe me you will!

[@millythompson2826]

This has helped me so much. Thank You Carrie. I'm in a pantomime in 3 hours & this has really boosted my self-confidence & the way I look at stuff. To all you out there, believe in yourselves and be CONFIDENT :) x

[@rileyymarieee]

That's one thing I really love about musicians, actors, dancers, ect. As a self-proclaimed shy dancer, the number one thing I got from people when I came off stage was "Wow, you look like a completely different person out there!" and it was true, because I was. I was this alt ego me that was super confident and could dance my heart out in front of all kinds of people I didn't know, and I feel like the same feeling comes with being a musician or actor, or anything that involves being up on stage. You transform yourself into not necessarily someone you're not, but into someone that really knows and can find their voice (whether that be literal or hypothetical) and it just amazes me how people can do this every single day. It's almost like a little secret among shy performers everywhere.

[@ladielydkyd1281]

I'm going through therapy for depression and anxiety and this definitely sounds like something I should do.

[@tryingtobeeloquent]

Have you gotten anywhere?? It helped me and i hope you're doing better!

[@Starlight-Tale]

And this makes me feel better too, because I like acting, whether in classes or small plays, but often will get nervous when on stage or performing in front of people in general, and so it's nice to know that even professional actors like you get nervous.

[@elena_youknow]

There are a lot of situations where I can be really confident although I'm more of a shy person. It's more these everyday situation where I'm not confident, especially when I'm with strangers. Holding a presentation in class, no problem. Being on stage, I don't even care. Fooling around with my friends (even in public), sure! But calling someone I don't know that well. Asking a shop assistant where I can find the butter. Making conversation with strangers. No, just no.. But when I just force myself to do something like that, then I feel more and more confident when I'm in a situation like that again because then I know that I don't have a reason to be afraid. Great video, Carrie! You're an inspiration to all of us and I think with this video you've encouraged a lot of people!! :)

[@bethmachell2330]

Thank you Carrie for this video, it is just what I needed right now! I am at grade 8 level in both clarinet and piano and I want to be a musician as my career, this involves performances. In front of people! I have played in a few competitions and have won but that does not mean the next time I have more confidence I have had my fair share of panics and throwing ups over the last couple of years due to this. In April I have a couple of big performances as I have recently got into the national children's chamber orchestra which involves meeting new people and performing in public concerts in London. A complete nightmare. This video is going to help so much so Carrie if you see this, Thank You! xxx

[@angelicat8540]

This was like a Blackery Feel Good 101 but the Hopeful edition. Very well done!

[@emilywatson2019]

The "fake it until you make it" saying, is so true! This has helped me and I've only been using it for a week...we all become what we pretend to be :) thanks so much Carrie and I look to you for advice every day.

[@DianaMintalaPrincess]

Thanks Carrie. Whenever I have a bad day or just need something to cheer me up, I can come to you and watch one of your videos. I feel like you're the big sister of the KZbin Community. You care about everyone and you can really make me feel better with your calm, sorted and kind manner. You can make me happy and I thank you for that, Carrie! Love you much! xx

[@ScorchTheRedhead]

Finally! Someone who gets it!!!! I spend my introverted life being one of the most shy in my year; I ate reading allowed, I hate 'acting' in front of my family, I hate public speaking. But give me a role or a character, or a scenario, and I'm fine with it, hence why I'm pursuing a career in acting. :) Lovely video Carrie! xxx

[@AmyRae]

Dear person reading this, Take time to do what makes your soul happy! You are a special and important person, so don't try to fit in and start being you! You are an amazing human being inside and out, never forget to show your beautiful smile :) When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change, you can make your dreams come true :) We all deserve someone who cares for us, and I care for you, whether I know you or not. If you ever need support or to blurt out anything thats on your mind, people are always here, including me. Love you all Xx

[@wanderingbutnotlost9]

I used to be so shy and self conscious and no one told me the whole 'fake it til you make it' thing, I just started doing it, I started telling myself that I didn't care what people thought of how I looked or what I wore (even though at the time I did quite a bit) and now I honestly don't and I'm a lot happier. I used to walk down the street just constantly looking down at the pavement (my mother told me that would make me more of a target to murderers so I was determined to stop), and now I walk with my head held high, and it's so much better (I can actually see things in front of me, including murderers!). Anyway, that was my story. Great video, Carrie. x

[@NigelLloydCyrilFelix]

So very true, Carrie. To refer to Hannah Hart's Tunesday with Chester See: "It's all denial, confidence is a lie. Everybody's faking it so you just gotta try. All you have to say to yourself every day is, guess what? Nobody knows how scared I am. LETS DO AMAZING THINGS, LIKE GOING TO CHESTER'S HOUSE AND MAKING SINGS, OH YEAH!" And then the card gets full and we all cry with Chester. But the point was yes. You always make videos that reassure us these things are okay. Thank you, Carrie.

[@gdavies1997]

Thank you for this Carrie. I'm in a really difficult situation when it comes to confidence. People think i'm a confident person when really i'm not and avoid doing things because I am too scared to do them. Now I am doing my A levels (i'm in year 12) I have really changed as a person - i'm finding it so difficult to do well and keep up with the expectations that people have of me. I get so scared and worried about little things or big things and I don't know what to do. I keep everything to myself, all my worries and apprehensions. It got to the point where I thought I was going to burst - revision was difficult, school felt ridiculously hard, there was so much pressure for me to do well, I haven't practiced my cornet in so long, I feel like people are laughing at me behind my back, I'm insecure, and most of all, I always thought I knew what I wanted to do with my life and now i'm not sure. I wanted to do an English degree because that was my passion and then become a teacher, writing books along the way. I do a level English lit and I feel like I have fallen out of love with it and all I want is for that love to come back (I have such a need to read books that I don't have time to do anymore). I spoke to the only person I have ever spoken to like this before which is my old English teacher from GCSE. He has been so helpful and I feel like there is someone to talk to, but I still feel lost and I don't know what to do, I don't want to burden him with my problems even if he said he wants to help me. I get so lonely and I don't know who to talk to about my problems. what do I do? Thank you though Carrie. you're such an inspirational person and make videos that really really help me. You give a ray of sunshine in my life that helps me through the difficult days. I wish you all the happiness and good fortune in the world xx

[@calihny]

I always thought I was quite confident around people and open to new things. I'm doing an exchange year in theUS and I've come to realize that I'm not as confident as I thought I was. It's not even that I'm not confident in myself but just that it's so much harder showing confidence in front of people you don't know.

[@lifeandlifeonly100]

This is a seriously good list of advice and I really hope every watching it, takes it on board! Looking people in the eye is a great one. I never used to be able to do that, and I never really understood why I had to, but when I started forcing myself to do it, and practised a lot, it changed my social skills dramatically. It's strange how important it is, but it is very important.

[@HelloImNikita]

This advice was so amazingly well put. I have two awkward and nerve wracking experiences approaching tomorrow and I am going to make sure your words stick with me to help me get through it!

[@eleanorhenderson9896]

I'm a fairly confident person but I can am also quite self-conscious so that can effect how i act around people so this was very good. The confident part of me completely agrees with this and the self-conscious part of me is so grateful for this video!

[@lucymoore7676]

So I watched this video when it first came out, just before my first school show rehearsal, where I had my first principal role (Meat in We Will Rock You), and it motivated me to pretend to be confident and know what I'm doing, and it helped me make so many more friends than I would've, and even meet my now-boyfriend! So thanks Carrie x3

[@seriouslythisisjust]

I started a self-confidence project for myself about a year and a half ago where I basically try to suck it up and do all of these things despite usually being terrified of social situations and my brain turning to a ball of fluff when someone tries to talk to me. It's been weird and hard sometimes--I feel like I'm being annoying or attention-seeking--but it's been improving ever so slightly.. I haven't really made any new friends yet because of this, but I have had a lot more fun and gotten closer to my old friends, and have had the nerve to talk to classmates and acquaintances in situations where I never would have before. Still working on it!

[@raspberriers]

Some awesome advice I got was my freshman year when I went to audition for the fall play. I asked this kid how everyone does it, since I was new to the drama program and was terrified, and he just smiled and said "We act like we're good actors."

[@WeAreTheSmellyCats]

Thank you so much for this carrie... I've always been shy, and for years I've always gotten nervous at just the thought of performing a music or drama assessment to the class. I worry about pretty much everything and the slightest thought of something sends my heart completely all over the place with nerves, but i am definitely going to try and be more confident now. I've just filled out my options form the other week, and was seriously debating whether to take gcse music simply because of the performing side, but did anyway, so thanks to you I hope I'm going to be able to build up that confidence for my exams when I get there...thank you -smellycatone x

[@Fabbiabbi234]

I completely agree with everything you say here Carrie, I was incredibly shy throughout primary school, and it was only once I reached the age of 14 that I decided I wanted to be able to answer teachers in school, so I imagined myself as a different person, and I was able to do it. Having after school activities such as girlguiding and ice skating was really helpful too as I met new people and those people became my friends, and so my self esteem grew. So, this really does work! I consider myself confident now because I've been acting that way for so long :)

[@TheCharleyparley]

I actually cried at this- you make some strong points that I struggle with daily. Thank you xx

[@ericak5110]

I genuinely think watching this video helped me find a path to gain more confidence. Thanks to you Carrie Hope Fletcher :)

[@mephistajellicle9286]

I just made up my mind and wrote a list, it is a whole page! Now I am very happy and I believe in myself. Thanks for this great advice!

[@LovingDeWorld]

I haven't seen a Carrie video in so long, I've forgotten how happy they make me. So thank you for being awesome.

[@ToriTija]

Ya know something? This video actually made me cry for a bit. This is something I've struggled with for a long time. It's made it incredibly difficult for me to make any good friends, because I'm always too nervous and afraid of opening up and being confident. I grew up constantly told that I wasn't good enough and that I wasn't worth more than my book smarts. My brain is almost hard-wired to believe that now. I just started studying at a university a few months ago, and I've yet to make any friends. I'm trying to be confident, but it's a really rough path trying to learn to love myself. So thank you for the advice, Carrie. I'll try implementing those suggestions into my confidence inventory. Stay merry, Carrie 😊 I hope you're well.

[@eilidh5286]

All your tips were very useful, thank you! The first two really hit home as to how u confident I am as it find it virtually to give anyone apart from my parents and nieces and nephews eye contact when I'm talking to them.

[@webbyalex]

100% this. I wish I hadn't brushed off the phrase fake it until you make it so much when I was younger, it took me until my 20s to really take it on board and go with it and I still struggle and it's not always easy but it really does work.

[@HumbleOddity]

Thank you so much for this! Videos like this are always just what I needed, I think this is why us Hopefuls have adopted you as our big sister - you always seem to know the right things to say and it feels like you are talking to each of us personally. At least, that's how I see it :)

[@MaDbutProuD]

Carrie, thank you so much for this! I'm at uni doing music and have my performance recital next week, and although playing is my life, I'm terrified! I get stage fright but I'm determined to beat it because it won't stop me doing what I want to in life and performing; you made me finally realise I might be able to do it :D You're amazing xx

[@chloepepworth554]

Carrie ALWAYS gives the best advice and the nicest positive messages that everyone can relate to and take on board. So inspiring x

[@AzureHart]

Great advice. I used to be horribly shy and would feel sick to my stomach in new situations but I've worked on it and gotten a lot more confident talking to people. It's getting me to shut up again that's the trick.

[@MsBlulucky]

I moved to the UK 4 months ago to work as an au pair and it really helped me to be more self confident and independent and to gain self esteem. I can look in the mirror and say to myself I'm beautiful, I have amazing hair, my eyes have a fascinating colour etc. Of course I still see the flaws (spots, big nose, weird shaped eyes) but I care way less about them. So if you get the chance to go abroad without anyone who knows you, take that chance!

[@pastelstyler6091]

-whenever I wear an outfit I'm proud of, it makes me feel 10x better about myself and how my day is going -I can make excellent chocolate chip cookies -I am a very open and loving person and tend to easily connect to other people -I will support my true friends all day everyday -anddd I'm proud of how my running routine has been improving lately:) Thank you for this video the message was amazing :)

[@Saraisms]

Good gracious....this is the best advice for confidence building EVER. Seriously, Carrie, thank you SO much! This is going to help me a ton. xxxx

[@pcboga]

This is geniusssss. Omg, I've worked this the whole year with my therapist and it's exactly what I've learnt!

[@spainbarcafootyfan]

Carrie I know this video is old but it always resonates everytime I watch it and you are one of the most inspirational people on the Internet and I'd love to be your friend. Thank you for being there for me and all the hopefuls out there even though we don't know each other personally. You give me hope 🌟

[@298maia]

Thank you!!! This made me realise that one day i might not be as shy as i am now, if i work on it, and i promise myself i'll try my hardest even if it not at all easy.

[@TKNemo984]

Thank you so much! I've really struggled with self confidence and the irony is my new years resolution is to be more self confident. I found this video really motivating and although you probably won't read this, I really admire you and your videos.

[@Helena-ci6is]

You are such an amazing person! I truly appreciate this "how to" to confidence, because, well I don't have any. It's always great to know that other people out there are thing the exact same thing as you. I've always had social interaction problems, so these pointers will be very useful when trying to open up. I would just like to say, Thank you 😊

[@larivari110]

I'm actually flying out to an audition to an American university from Austria in two weeks. And I am already nervous. I know I don't want to go in as I usually do. Normally I play kind of shy buy still out going and it many people tend to like it. I think because they have the feeling that they are better than me in a way. However, at an audition I have to convince them that I am THE BEST. That I am worthy of being taken into the program. I have not quite decided on two monologues. They should be contrasting and age appropriate and one should feel confident with the language. I want to like the monologue and what's very important is that I want them to remember where I am coming from. It's a very important difference from others. 1) Wedekind: The Awakening of Spring - I have thought about this, simply because it's about Germans and I have a natural German accent. 2) Pirandello: 6 Characters in Search of an Author - I liked the Stepdaughter's monologue in the beginning, when she pictures the set and tells about the moment her stepdad wants to sleep with her as a prostitute. And it's European, which kind of shows my roots. 3) Larson: A Thing for Nerds - I loved the title and the monologue just because it's a nerdy one and nerds are the reason why I want to study Theatre and why I want to study at THIS exact university. It relates to me well, but I don't know how people would receive it and whether they would like the message. In all, if you have any suggestions, please help me! I know this video will help me with my appearance already, but any additional advice would be amazing! Thank you and thanks Carrie

[@georgia66666]

I worked on this while I was in a psych ward, but it's still so hard for me to find things I'm good at and proud of. So I've hung the list up on the fridge and have gotten in the habit of adding things as soon as I think of them. It gets to me how negative I am about things, myself included, but I'm working on it. (:

[@dancinsunray97]

you are by far the best youtuber ive ever watched. there are no words to explain how thankful i am to you for being you and telling me what i need to know. im proud to call myself a hopeful!!!!!:)

[@TheUncannyValley0]

A while ago I had a panic attack in the middle of a debate out of nowhere after debating for years and I've been too scared to do it since, but I'm graduating this year and I feel like it's my last chance to give it another shot so I'm going to get back on the team. Sometimes you can't wait for confidence to come to you again, you just have to go and find it for yourself :)

[@HiddenPaws]

This was wonderful and so well needed :) I have my first musical theatre college audition tomorrow, and I was panicking so much, but now I just feel ready and ok :)

[@jasmineindia1118]

Carrie, being introvert isnt being shy, being introvert is where an individual gains energy from being on their own. Extrovert is gaining energy from being around others xx

[@clough182]

been feeling a bit down and out for the count the past few days, and this video has given me a good kick in the backside to stop sulking for myself and "get up and get over it" :P thanks Carrie!

[@Jadisfrost]

Thank you so much angel. I had a really terrible day at work today where my confidence in myself was completely knocked. I was debating how I was going to approach my manager about a very difficult situation but you reminded me that I am a great actress, I might not be confident but I can pretend... I can be Any Jane Austin character, any damsel in distress or I can be Bridget Jones or Repunsel. On Wednesday, when I face my boss I shall be.... you!... have a great day and by the way... you are amazing! ;-)

[@Wander85942]

This is what I love about making KZbin videos it did overtime build up my confidence in myself

[@hollyrodgers1355]

I really struggle too! I can play a lot of instruments and apparently can sing and act like it's my profession, but I'm always shy! I find it really difficult to make new friends and when I have to perform I get so nervous and am afraid that people will judge me. So this video has really helped me to be more confident! THANK YOU!!!!!! xxxxxxx

[@HurstHillPerformers]

I hope I'm not the only one actually sitting here thinking, 'I can't think of anything!' I'm good at making myself invisible to the world... that is all! Brilliant video again though Carrie, I always try to use your advice if I think it's something I should personally work on, and I think this is definitely something I should get to grips with Xxx

[@aryastark2836]

My new year's resolution: to be a happy and confident person! So glad you made this video x

[@jojogummibear]

I completely understand the whole being a character on stage is so much easier than being yourself. I find acting much, much easier than going on stage and speaking as Jordyn.