How to Handle Parenting Alone (Absent Baby Daddy)

[@MissExclusive4]

You're not alone, and you can be successful with what you have available.🌸 Want more advice on this topic!? Check out this playlist for more advice : kzbin.info/aero/PLPaoanNxlohSFnQO3WkZ0iPUgIqJvCohO

[@FlorenceW101]

Hi Joche can u check ur dm on Instagram i messaged u

[@MissExclusive4]

@@FlorenceW101 yes ma'am. I responded💗

[@cherishthebeat]

I just don’t understand why some men just can’t communicate only about the kids . They wanna communicate about everything except the kids. You gave great and advice and was so calm lol me on the other hand lol I would’ve been up here hype 🤣🤣

[@MissExclusive4]

All I could say was GOD and GROWTH. hahaha!

[@LariTheWarrior]

Tbh i thought i wouldn’t be able to relate watching this as i dnt have a babydaddy or a kid. But i still learnt a lot to help my friends who have babies and babydaddies issues. Ima sent this to them. What ur babydaddy did was triflin.. that behaviour is just childish af. You’re very mature. He seems to think if he’s not involve with u then he doesn’t hafto be involve with ur son. Thats just plain wrong. And i agree to bringing positive male figures around your kid if the babydaddy isnt present. i really hope single mothers listen to this. U CANT FORCE A MAN TO STEP UP and be a man. U control what u can control and move forward. I hope i never ever get blinded by love to the point that i dnt see the bigger picture.

[@MissExclusive4]

I pray that you don't either and I thank you for watching and offering your kind words.

[@Alcoholpad]

My child’s dad doesn’t help at all, but hes constantly saying I wanna be in his life. None of his actions show he means it. I end up looking stupid and desperate because I’m advocating for something he is not. I stop contacting him for awhile and that’s the only time he’s serious about seeing our son. Am I wrong for stepping away for good ?

[@MissExclusive4]

It's hard to say without knowing everything about your situation. If it is hurting your child then of course you have to do what's best. However, establishing a healthy coparenting situation does not make you a bad person. If he cannot be consistent then it can cause strain for your child later. Personally, I had to allow space and separation to get to that place.

[@AprilNewlyMe]

I think this is a great subject matter for anyone going through it. Being raised by a single mother I saw this first hand. It’s shouldn’t always be left up to the mothers or one part to make an effect.

[@MissExclusive4]

Agreed! thank you April!

[@HippiieLoveOfficial]

My Husband Isn’t Absent for our Kids but His Job low key Makes Him Absent . He works the graveyard Shift meaning through The day he has to sleep and 70% On His Days Off He Rather wants to kick it with Friends or Go To His Parents home . We Love him And All But I would Tell Him He needs to Give The girls Atleast a Full Relaxed Fun . Your Right We Cant Force Them To Be Their . That’s why I Show My Girls They Are My First Priority . First My Kids And Then The Rest . We Might Have Him Here But We Feel His Absence A Lot . And I Might Not Be A Single Mom But I Feel Like One .

[@MissExclusive4]

This is an awesome perspective. Have you tried having a sit down conversation with him about this? I think that it is difficult because men and women have different perspectives and bonds with children. Maybe he thinks he is being there because he provides and finds value in being with his other relatives and friends in his spare time because work is stressful. I think it is amazing that you focus on making your girls feel like your first priority. I wish for a shift in the household to allow you all to bond more.

[@Grantford1993]

Thank you I needed it. Everytime I ask my childs father for help he is quick to say he's trying to get himself together. And it's been 5 years now no consistent help. Everytime I ask for help I'm called bitter. So I gave up and decided maybe I just need to go through the courts because it's too stressful for me. Now that I have met a man and have babies on the way, he keeps trying to show up at my house, pretends it's about his child. Just too much. And your right when I stopped responding to him he would harass me and have his family and friends harass me. It's just too much.

[@MissExclusive4]

I understand completely. I hope that things improve soon. Thank you for watching🥰🥰

[@LatriceKelly]

It can definitely be a challenge to coparent when you are no longer with your child’s father. I believe the hurt that both people experience definitely trickles down into the parenting style, choices, and communication with each other. Things sometimes go towards the divisive and non-constructive territory. Parents often lose sight of what’s really important and that is the child’s well-being. Many times the child is witness to these contentious conversations and poor behavior from the parents who are so dead set on revenge, getting the last word, and being right all the time. My heart goes out to all the single moms who experience a hardship and trying to raise their child the best way they can when the other parent is not as cooperative or as present. 💜

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you Latrice. I agree wholeheartedly with all of this, but that middle part SANG to me hahaha lol. I've lived through this as a child seeing it with my parents and as a single mom prior to marriage.

[@MissExclusive4]

💜💜

[@customfittedinc]

I THHE OPPOSITE I HAVE THE LORD JUST DO YOUR PART I ALWAYS SHOW UP AND I HAVE BAD MEN I HAVE CHOSEN I KNOW GOOD ONES ITS NOT ME AND IM FED UP AND BURNT OUT DO SOMETHING OR I WILL SEEK SUPPORT TO HELP ME OUT I DONT WANT HIM I DONT CARE HE JUMPED SHIP AFTER 10 YEARS OFF AND ON ANDNOW IM DREAMING ABOUT THE FOOL TMI WELL ITS FINE IM JUST SAYING I DONT LIKE THIS

[@ashajeremiahqw8775]

I agree

[@QuinnCJ]

I find that women often give more than men. I've been that woman. Your story sounds very familiar. The driving girl I was there.

[@MissExclusive4]

Girl me too! I had to stop that foolishness haha

[@MissExclusive4]

And I agree. I see it more often that not with younger women giving ALOT when they love someone.

I really think advice like this is your calling. There is SO MUCH suffering because of dead beat parents or toxic parents that creates a generational cycle of toxicity for the child. I hope you make a video on HOW you actually MENTALLY were able to mature enough emotionally to get to the point where you can take these types of ations. I see so many women STUCK because of their toxic babby daddy.

[@MissExclusive4]

Riana, thank you! This means so much. I love to give advice so I will def. add that to my list of things to discuss here. I agree with your statement too. It is really sad to see the cycle repeat and its affect on the kids, and may get stuck there.

[@algram8541]

Easy stop have babies when men tell I they don’t want it. Let’s be real women sometimes have babies in a selfish manner. Forced fatherhood isn’t cool

[@MissExclusive4]

That’s a very real statement. What are your thoughts around the ones that state they want it but switch up after the baby is born?

[@comegetthiscommentary]

Yes that effort change when you not together... to the good or bad. -So true don't blame yourself. You touched on so many key points!

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you Keva. The effort will change and it is not always a bad thing that it does. Sometimes that chase to make the other person parent can hold you back from moving forward.

[@MMNTrueCrime]

I’ll bet it’s so hard to be the bigger person in a situation with an absentee dad. I’m only a mom to dogs, but I once tried to share custody of my dog, and it was a disaster. 😂 You’ve got this though, and the fact that you’re putting your child in front of your own feelings is so challenging but impressive.

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you for watching!! And you make a good point. Sharing custody can be challenging but that is where your maturity and selflessness come into play.

[@ashajeremiahqw8775]

I know I watch your videos now that I am in a vulnerable state . Watching your videos gives me reassurance . My child’s father has became extremely nasty to me for a whole month ever since I questioned him about other women and a woman . I just want to pray for my sake and sanity . We agree that co parenting will be best . He does not check on me to make sure my wellbeing is okay . I guess he only focus on the child which is good . In the beginning he didn’t believe in co parenting we were set on buying a home together . Now I have to find a one bedroom for me me and my unborn child . I don’t think living with him will be acceptable. Unless I take my maternity leave to live back in with him . I can’t be miserable I am finding peace and hopefully healthy enough for my baby

[@QuinnCJ]

You give sound advice with such a calming tone!

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you so much my friend!

[@dennisblack3328]

No she doesn't , Shes is part of the problem of why the mgtow movement is becoming bigger and bigger ... I have a daughter and I don't want her growing up with the mind set of having a baby just to look forward to being a single mother.

[@natalyhooper5610]

How do I be OK with, He had a child with another woman and he’s been around that child an holding her kids more than he’s a been around his first born which is my daughter.. Apparently he doesn’t wanna talk to me because all I do is fight with him. I’m not necessarily fighting with him I’m just calling him out on his bullshit and when I do he doesn’t contact me and then tries to act like he’s been around for my baby who is almost 3 she hasn’t seen him since before her first birthday.. I know it’s a lot but if you’re reading this please respond and give me your best advice…

[@MissExclusive4]

Allow him to help you for the sake of your daughter. Try not to keep up with what he’s doing otherwise because it will continue to anger you. At the end of the day, he will have the regret that comes with not being there for her when she grows up and is not as close to him or just does not care to talk/spend time. Forgive him for those things and focus on coparenting. Try not to let him upset you. And if you have connection with his family (I.e. his mom, or sibling) and they want to help you then go through them instead so she can still have a relationship with that side of her family.

[@natalyhooper5610]

@@MissExclusive4 Thank you so much I really needed to hear that!!

[@comegetthiscommentary]

Also you look very pretty 😍 I love your hair.

[@MissExclusive4]

I love you Keva! Thank you.

[@isisg666]

I guess going to church can give us a male figure. I never thought of that. Thanks.

[@MissExclusive4]

You’re welcome!

[@LawrenceFamilyTv]

Yes indeed. Co parenting is key. A lot of it is due to one’s bitterness or always trying to compete. Speaking from what I know. This is so awesome. & I just know that it will be helpful to someone. Raising awareness. I love this type of content!

[@JeannideV]

Jeannide V I think diversity in family dynamics are ok but for the past decade, idk if it is because of social media that it looks amplified or it was always like this, but it seems like there are just way more baby mamas and daddies than an established family, for lack of a better word. Sometimes , it is what it is. You have to do the best you can but other times. This could be avoided. It is too much drama . That video he sent u was very inappropriate

[@MissExclusive4]

Girl it was! I had to ask God for strength during that time. I agree. There are many baby showers and not a lot of weddings. I never thought I would be in the situation, but it prepared me to be a woman that loves herself more and I ended up marrying a great person.

[@jasminebarfield5040]

Relationships are so complex! It makes it more so when children are involved. I’m experiencing that many people have children before they are fully adults and have the emotional maturity or skills to do it well. Great advice!

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you Jasmine. I agree and having children before you're mature will typically result in selfish behavior.

[@toisparrow877]

I so appreciate your perspective. It is also very freeing to remove the guilt of one's own poor choices to overlook someone's character. I would like to hear your thoughts on moving on as an individual when you are an unexpected single parent.

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you for watching ❤️ I hope you subscribe! I actually do have a video about this and a whole playlist. I’m going to share the link with you. I’m wishing you the best!.

[@MissExclusive4]

Here’s the playlist: the video is the one that says “Single while pregnant” on the thumbnail kzbin.info/www/bejne/pGG7pqawhthrrM0

[@cherishingflo]

These are definitely great tips. And thanks for sharing your personal experience, cause it definitely gives insight to what really goes on.

[@MissExclusive4]

You're so welcome! Thank you for watching.

[@OneandaHalfReviews]

Thanks for sharing this is super handy and useful for alot of mum's out there, thank you 💕💕

[@MissExclusive4]

Thanks for watching

[@samanthagall3893]

I really needed this, thank you ❤️

[@MissExclusive4]

You’re welcome! I’m glad that it was helpful. I’m wishing you the best. Subscribe for more advice❤️

[@ShakaylanK]

You are so calm . Very good advise !

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you❤

[@dad.0]

Awesome content as always!

[@MissExclusive4]

Glad you think so!

[@3rdeyevisions]

Another great topic, oh by the way, I used your video, gave you credit and put the link in my description, again thank you

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you very much. I just went over to check out your video and show some love in the comments. Thank you again for sharing!

[@ConservativeBaddieTV]

My baby dad doesn’t wanna be around because I don’t want to be in the relationship. The baby isn’t even here yet SMH

[@MissExclusive4]

I understand. It’s often an attempt to control you by being absent after not committing to the relationship when you were interested in trying to make it work. Continue to focus on your baby and your happiness.♥️

[@marquitadowdy4614]

What if he won’t help me do anything for our son? He does for some of his kids and not the others. Is it okay to block then? I am so tired of it!

[@MissExclusive4]

Has he ever expressed a reason to you why he won’t help? Does he have doubt on the baby being his? I wouldn’t say block him/them but maybe consider dna test/serving him if he’s refusing to help his son. Also, let him come to you.

[@pammymh9676]

I am worried my daughter is 2 hasn't been in her life... but I wanted him to step up so we dna test results due soon. Hoping he steps up and spends time with her once its proven. I know he is the dad (werent in relationships at all). His girlfriend is kind so hope she encourages a pisitive relationship

[@MissExclusive4]

I’m Wishing you all the best Pammy🙏🏽

[@AlieshiaTV]

Here to show some support love your real advice

[@MissExclusive4]

I appreciate you Alieshia! :)

[@simplymercy7657]

Beautiful advice, great content girl.

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you so much!

[@jazmineginyard2005]

Thank you for this!

[@MissExclusive4]

You’re welcome. Thank you for watching. Subscribe for more like this❤️

[@deannryan8981]

I neeeeeeded this

[@MissExclusive4]

I’m glad this helped you

[@kirstenrae4662]

I feel like I want to be your best friend, just to have someone to relate to and vent to! Great video, it's what I needed to hear. ❤

[@MissExclusive4]

Thank you Kirsten❤️ I’m glad that this resonated with you. Subscribe and stick around I’m still here on KZbin and social media giving advice. Everything is going to work out.

[@kirstenrae4662]

@@MissExclusive4 You def have a subscriber!!

[@MissExclusive4]

@@kirstenrae4662 thank you🥰🥰

[@shina3047]

🦋 love it. Thanks 😊

[@MissExclusive4]

You're welcome💗