How To Handle People Who Hurt You - Rabbi Friedman talks to inmates

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[@meteor2012able]

I was fired from a good job in a buerocracy after falsely accused of wrongdoing. I went into a state of depression mixed with great anger. Fortunately, I later landed a much better job. Partially based on good references from my former colleagues who knew of my case. In my story, I forgave my accusers and actually felt sorry for them. Then, several years later, all my accusers and head of the department were all fired in a major scandle. Oh, sweet justice caught up with them! One of my accusers applied for work at my new organization and my boss asked me if I could work with her. I sincerely said "yes... absolutely. Briefly, explining that I forgave her fully." It is true. Taking the high road, works.... eventually. Great video!

[@lovenlightman]

Would u think the same had u not found a better Job after that? Or not finding a Job?

[@truthsurgesmommy8873]

USA LATINO No disrespect man. You came to my place for a job I'd fucking run away out of sheer fright.

[@tiffanifarrington4039]

USA Latino Sounds kinda like my story... well not really but. My Ex dumped me and he wouldn’t talk to me. I was so distraught and I just needed to see him! So, I applied for a job at his company in his department. I ended up getting hired at the company BUT they offered me a better position in a different department and it was the highest paying entry level position there. After I found that out, do you think I gave him a second thought!??? Especially to know I was trying to get him back only to be making more money than him! Lol I only saw him once after that at our Christmas party and I barely noticed him! What a blessing! Life is funny like that.

[@truthsurgesmommy8873]

@@tiffanifarrington4039 escort agency🤣

[@lovenlightman]

@m v Well sounds to much like Disney Land to me....

[@lbrooks2965]

Wayne Dyer said it best, “How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.”

[@sheri88888888]

That is why you have to try to never hurt people.

[@dwazenheuvel6735]

Well.. there is another thing.. People don´t treat you badly, because they want to, but because they see no other option. They need to.. Also, you decide it´s bad what they did, so you brought the "evil" into the world and what do you know? Sorry, evil people just don´t exist, so we do not have a need for Karma, that´s just a fairy tale, like God working everything out. The truth is much, much simpler. Nothing supernatural and just people trying their best, but not always being capable of being kind. Usually through no fault of their own. And there is just so much you can do to avoid hurting others. You think that lettuce wants to be eaten?

[@EM-mr3sg]

I think lettuce DOES want to be eaten. That’s how it spreads its seeds.

[@skellingtonmeteoryballoon]

Expressions of remorse is something special.

[@johnlynch575]

4:17 AMEN TO THAT. THIS IS THE CRUX. A TRUE MERCY FROM ABOVE AS HE SMILES LOVINGLY UPON OUR VILE SPIRIT " NOT YET DEAR CHILDREN "

[@victoriahanke1990]

It amazes me that as humans we are so cruel, nasty, mean, hateful, and unkind to each other.

[@sheri88888888]

I guess they look like humans. So cold and heartless. Incapable of feeling or even understanding feelings like we do.

[@robbyethomas-ciao2022]

Victoria, between 2011-2019 I contained those same prickly thoughts. I became a victim of sadness, empathy, and anger over that which I had no means to alter. Through the Rabbi, his considerate delivery brought enlightenment. Today, a wise Matriarch spoke this concept and my mind's sight was not clear. As Rabbi spoke, we don't think this way. *My limited teaching and learning and application led me to believe /"feel" misunderstood. I was being Needy! Some in constant isolation from family are better role models than some who have Freedom. Choice: acknowledge it, do our part, and try to pass on this crystal clear pathway to Freedom and a powerfully productive better adjusted mindsetlife and relationships. Quality of our thoughts. How to teach children, preteens, teens and young adults this.

[@victoriahanke1990]

Robbye Thomas Travels Excited to Explore what a kind informative message. Thank you for the enlightenment. Be well and peace and love to you. ♥️🙏🕊

[@victoriahanke1990]

Msg of Yitzhak Kaduri wise words. Thank you. 🕊🙏

[@tzughydogg7818]

We just have different opinions...God doesn't get to make decisions...we do! It's just that we decide the outcome of our choices... wether we like it or not!

[@mesretbezabih5302]

I am a Christian and my boss is a real good friend Jewish we enjoy hearing your message because we all are God’s children.Bless you!

[@soulprospers4110]

In our minds, we give people way too much power over us. But it’s just an illusion, a trick of the enemy. There is no power but the power of God. Such an awesome video❤️

[@JJ-yu6og]

This doesnt apply to a toddler who was abused and raped by his caregivers. The toddler grows up to be what kind if adult???? The mental health of that child/adult is questionable

[@dwazenheuvel6735]

You give God too much power. Have a little faith in you. No need to judge others, but if you can do that out of your own volition in stead of because of God asking you, wouldn´t that be way more powerful? If you feel you need God for that, fine, whatever floats your boat. But please refrain from telling people there is no power but the power of God, especially children.. That´s just trying to keep them small. We have had enough crusades. Nobody needs God. Don´t save me. Oh and good news, that enemy is not real either.

[@LassieSgr]

@@JJ-yu6og why is this rabbi so oblivious to the hate and the evil that's committed against these children . Warning you don't Rita's ones about child abuse or abusive parents

[@user-ep8nr8qf9p]

What if it’s a doctor using drugs and things learned in books to disrupt your intuition

[@user-ep8nr8qf9p]

@@JJ-yu6og correct. And then it gets worse if he is drugged and has his thoughts reframed

[@bettinamunchberg662]

This gives me a new perspective on my life, so I can change everything - even my past. Thank you, Rabbi Friedman!

[@JJ-yu6og]

This doesnt apply to a toddler who was abused and raped by his caregivers. The toddler grows up to be what kind if adult???? The mental health of that child/adult is questionable

[@sheri88888888]

@@JJ-yu6og If an abused child made it through that it could only be easier later on I think. If you retaliate or do it yourself you are doing what the evil people want. Being like them.Who know what twisted thoughts are in the minds of child molesters. I think demons reside there..

[@co4975]

Jojo Jo / the victim alone has the right to raise the issue of forgiveness or of revenge. I cannot understand the ones who blame the victims for revenge when this means to make the abuser to pay for his abuse.

[@rosefrancis9818]

@@JJ-yu6og I think you are missing the point. You don't have to forgive and forget everything. There are consequences for your actions. But if someone can get the corrage and move on to a healthy life its better

[@williamspeedwell6727]

@@co4975 I upvote you n+1 For this comment

[@jilligian1243]

I just want to say that you are one the most insightful, pure , honest , nicest person I’ve ever heard speak. Thank you for being Alive

[@viktoryosiel]

His explanations of the bible are incredible. I like the way he speaks.

[@okekennamdi6054]

He is awesome

[@christophewiart693]

I am amazed by the wisdom and kindness of Rabbi Friedman

[@prosperousguisse8743]

christophe wiart I love him so much too for his wisdom ! Glory be to God who made him so!

[@prosperousguisse8743]

So good!

[@juliannahonor3249]

The first time I am seeing this Rabbi speak. I’m not Jewish, but I am always open to hearing wise men from any faith. He is wonderful! He really makes sense....we have a choice to be a victim or not towards people that hurt us!

[@solomondhlamini471]

I fully agree Rabbi. I usually tell people who believe they made my life miserable that they must stop giving themselves too much credit because it's only God who determines my destination

[@meghanwilcox5453]

But how do you act towards someone who mistreated you with no good reason? When people lash out at you because of their own pain and insecurities? Someone who is abusive towards you? How do you deal with them? It’s so hard to take the high road with those people, especially if they are not remorseful

[@maureenhenderson720]

What an amazing man . He is so truthful . What an inspiration. God Bless .

[@pupculturevenice]

What an excellent speech. And such a unique view point. It gives the person power when it is easy to feel disempowered if someone has chosen to treat you so poorly. Thank you. I will listen to this again and see if I can fully embrace this way of seeing. Much appreciated! ✨✨

[@co4975]

We can only have control over our own choices. Great point 👍

[@dianedupuis9973]

U guys................................working.....r..r....r...0..r. r. r.

[@lbrooks2965]

Wayne Dyer said it best, “How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.”

[@LarryPanozzo]

This should be taught to everyone. Whether someone interprets "God's plan" as fate or as God's plan, this powerful wisdom remains. I, like millions before me, independently discovered this distinction that no one directly has the power to affect anyone, making blame "vanish in a puff of logic," but Rabbi Manis Friedman communicates so concisely and so clearly. That influence is a wonderful gift to the world. Thanks again, Rabbi.

[@ntmn8444]

Wow this is powerful. And for those asking “well what about kids?” Guys, he’s not saying that children can’t be victimized. As they grow up they have choices to make, just like we all do. What they choose to do with their lives, if they survive the abuse or the hurt, that is their choice. If they don’t survive, then the person that hurt them made their choice. It’s not a good one, God watches. God knows all. You have to trust that god will bring justice. Emunah, God is in control.

[@joleneo.9085]

Undiluted wisdom and truth.

[@ameerjed3011]

I am a Muslim and I truly agree with you God Bless

[@tonnemiessek1052]

You forgive them so you dont cause them harm because hate is equivalent t murder. Leave them alone and they should do the same. Unhealthy relationships are not good.

[@alexandrameister4148]

God bless this man! This has seriously been one of the wisest things I ever heard. Plus, bcuz of the bad choices I did during my youth I felt like I don't have the authority to teach anybody anything, because I was being “stupid“. Now I know that even in the midst of all of that I still have the value to teach. This is very powerful! Thank you so much!

[@darlenesanchez4555]

For the last nine years that I have studied Judaism I have struggled on Saturdays Shabbat I haven't talked to my sister years and I waited for her to call me and say let's go to lunch with do something and no call I've listened to you on some of your speeches and I finally learn to let go knowing now that she won't ever call thank you Rabbi Friedman

[@cleveland3357]

Darlene Sanchez maybe she is waiting for you to call her too

[@darlenesanchez4555]

@@cleveland3357 Dear Jack. No I think it goes back a long way between me and my sister I'm her younger sister my son has passed on in 2004 before his death disappearance murder I was highly successful I own two homes I had a good job and I help my family out as much as I could when this happened to my son I had started getting health problems I lost my job I had to sell one of my homes to open up my financial umbrella well I grieve I went into my sister's house paid my rent to my sister but the sin the sin was there and her home she was married and her husband allowed her to go out with other men her marriage broke up when I was there and all I told her was if it was me I would have walked out of the relationship she blames me for her breakup and at that time I wasn't even into the Torah I cannot call her my brother just passed away about 2 weeks ago she was there at the hospital with me and my family is she did not say one word to me I did wait for her to call until I found myself on Saturday just getting sick emotionally over it I used to live next door to my mom and my sister lived in the basement apartment in my mother's house my mother gave me a print of a Picasso this Picasso was worth a little bit of money it had an official seal of some type on the back and yes it was on canvas I thought nothing of it rolled it up and put it in my closet I work nights my sister went into my house and took it about a year ago my brother what's going down Broadway in Denver and saw it in some antique shop he went in ask questions about it and said he bought it from a couple she gave them $10,000 for it

[@evelynmahoney3992]

yes amazing how we hold out wantin the other person to do or say and arent we the exact copy or image of the person that mistreated us. both are waitin or expectin somethin from the other ..meantime life is fleetin..so neither are important as think. God is most high not people that make bad choices.

[@annefinlayson6021]

Another enlightening message from this wonderful human being. He has taught me so much, I am forever grateful

[@ginatrascierraguzman3376]

Rabino friedman l learn everyday it is something usual to say from quite a lot of people, I a feel really lucky to learn from a person like you with such a clear inteligent mind that I have no words to express the impression that this has done to me, thank you for spending your time to teach to others so we can have the oportunity to make profound reflections of human matters I start to follow your videos I send you my best wishes

[@tendayitshuma8152]

Beautiful and powerful message. I truly appreciate it.

[@SyuzannaKaszo]

Thank you SO much! Immensely grateful for this message! Exactly what I needed to hear at this time.

[@skellingtonmeteoryballoon]

Great advice, Rabbi. Why does no one wanna talk about the stalkers ?? Anyone who knows me can vouch for my generosity, but over the years I've come to learn just how dangerous it can be.

[@VEROTHOMAS1]

Amen. Thank you for sharing, Blessings.

[@freedom768]

My freedom of choice is too send the ones that hurt themselves trying too hurt me ,love ,I rise above them knowing I was the better person in the relationship, loving me for the first time in my life...

[@robbyethomas-ciao2022]

Avril, You're a phenomenal person on the path that surpasses the ordinary human understanding. This is where we should all aspire to ascend.

[@freedom768]

@@robbyethomas-ciao2022 thank you for your kindness of words ,they inspire me even more ,they have touched my heart much appreciated, hurt is only a word to me now I wouldn't let it in ,life is ment too be enjoyed , thank you again. Take care.

[@jessedavidtelagathoti5603]

Dear Rabbi, I am Blessed with this Message. Thank U. To G-D be the Glory.

[@thebattlesandthewar]

A needed, transformative and actually liberating..word. Thank you

[@regulardude7961]

This is great advice for adults. What he is saying is only true when you're an adult. If you were a child suffering abuse from parents when you were totally helpless and dependent on them to meet your needs, then you *were* a victim. You may need to do family-of-origin work if you suffered abuse or neglect as a child that is keeping you stuck now. Healing family-of-origin issues can be the key to living joyously in the present moment.

[@meghanwilcox5453]

jim beam or in the situation of a rapist. Then you are also a victim

[@billnyberg3890]

I need this word everyday.

[@stevecoley8365]

Forgiving is one of the ways I accumulate light and warmth.

[@loveleah...]

What a beautiful way to express a visual perspective of forgiveness. Thank you for sharing this. 💖

[@theneutralplatform4834]

Wise words Steve. I will take this on board.

[@JozieMaXine]

I think this was the best speech I’ve ever heard in my life! Wow, thank you, & thank God for you. This was the first video I’ve watched of yours, but I subscribed. I LOVE your perspective on life & I’m definitely going to implement this in mine. My eyes are wide open now!

[@leaschnall641]

Thank you for your shiur . It helped me with the reality I have been struggling with in a very difficult time in my life.I blamed the people who caused pain and worse to a loved one. Ishaar choach. People do things and we are always in Hashem's hashgacha. Thank you.

[@karthikb3816]

Thank you so much for this video Rabbi. I've been suffering and facing betrayal from people around me but by the grace of God I will come out on top. Your video really helped give me perspective 🙏

[@ewaldspanner8815]

Thank you, Rabbi ! Your wisdom and insight is very uplifting !

[@Roosterbate44]

Well said Rabbi may God always be with you.

[@miledana925]

God bless you Rabbi Friedman, thank you.

[@Believer_75]

I just stumbled upon you sir... glad I did! Love the message! ❤

[@imwatching2960]

So inspirational!!! Thank you!

[@chinglanlie639]

the memories never goes away. memories memories memories

[@ms.fabolusmorgan4279]

I am so encourage that Rabbi is speaking to inmates a lot of brothers in lockdown need to hear this message .I like the Holocaust reference brothers need to hear slavery was not a choice. And Jim Crow and systemic Racism should not keep them in perpetual state of Victim hood Thank you Rabbi 😊

[@valerierago3615]

Thank you 🙏 I really needed to hear this.❤️

[@mesretbezabih5302]

I am a Christian but your message is for the hole world. You are great person.

[@krasimirastankova4832]

Good bless you Rabbi. Wize! I am one orthodox christian, strongly believe that Christ endeed complete the idea of the Old testament and is truly My God. Personal choice when is up to the choices. Cheers!

[@MishikPro]

What a wise man!.... Thank you Rabbi!

[@samrienghudson7493]

I love your video , you’re open my eyes one church one ( God. ) one love ✝️🙏❤️

[@cindybenitez928]

Wow such great advice. My Father passed away. I kind of see your videos and as you are talking imagine your my Father giving me advice like my Father would. God bless you ❤️

[@moussakham4819]

What a wise man!.... Thank you Rabbi! thank you so much

[@cubesanthony720]

Rabbi 0mg completely True sir ,, mankind has forgotten this Truth Thank you sir

[@thenutbrothers8726]

As usual very informative!

[@stephd7940]

I am sorry but I could have a bad tree. I am writing this as I am experiencing a low in my bipolar episodes but as of right now I feel as if I don't have a choice of anything. I try my best to be kind, nice and , good yet everyone and everything fucks me over for being too nice. I want to disappear. My doctor told me I have a choice of how I react to things but after so much betrayal I have found myself lashing out faster than before. I can't stand this abuse I just scream and slam my head on anything possible. I am seeking therapy because I know the positive side will occur one day

[@maryland8532]

Love your strategy Rabi! Now we have to choose right!

[@yisroelshapiro1469]

Wow. That is tremendous stuff. Thank you Rabbi

[@sylhomeo6351]

I’m in great respect of this Rabbi. This is exactly what we need to hear. It puts everything into perspective. Thank you, great wise man!

[@bestill365]

All that truly belongs to us in this life is choices, everything EVERYTHING else belongs to God! This was life changing!

[@Starlightskipper]

I really needed this. Thank you.

[@scorpio7938]

My mother used to tell me everything in life happens for a reason good or bad

[@20sandi12]

sometimes things just happen.

[@MaryamAli-vd1xv]

Seriously thanks so much.

[@hendsem]

Thank you Rabbi Manis

[@definitionofbeauty9585]

Thank you I really needed this!

[@gigichica]

Amazing sermon. Ty!!

[@marciaellenring3107]

That was life altering! Thank you!

[@Cmbtvtrn05]

Thank you for these kind words 🙏 much appreciated

[@debbiewilder4738]

The word says God works all things out for the good. That does not mean that you're not been a victim of someone else's selfishness. With divorce which I think means any badd situation if you have a way to get out get out (hes cheated or abused you)you don't have to stay and suffer their abuse. I agree you shouldn't let your past rob your life. That does not mean you haven't been a victum.

[@yosef5276]

I needed this.

[@justdea5757]

I would love if you talked more on this topic. I need to understand more to move forward. Thank you!

[@Favz01]

Thank You Rabbi. G-d bless you!!

[@rochellevon2376]

Wow! Excellent! Thank you! Life changing!

[@misteramed1116]

your speech change up my mindset thanks to this positive speech god ishappy with your life

[@marceloszw]

Thanks so much! Shalom!

[@gladysunegbu8881]

Thanks Rabbi🙏

[@mariacristinadelmundoarias4609]

Yes, thank you sir for that enlightenment.

[@netanya462]

I love this Rabbi

[@_N0_0ne]

Thank you kindly

[@pihurohil1214]

this is exactly what i have been thinking for days... Also the speaker looks like some GOOD WIZARD who is trying to help prevent the bad in the world

[@Fi-zics]

This message is deep and I'm looking to implement the lessons in my life, henceforth. Thank you Rabbi.

[@jackbreese7542]

This is true. By my church family. 10 year. Physical and mental abuse.

[@parvinmoussa5406]

I now follow you ad so glad l found you l have a Persian Jewish mother ad a Muslim father l had a lot of people very jelouse of me as you said they are petty jeouse people ad they know am a lot better than them thanks l wish l had you as my teacher when l was growing up

[@aldazejno7752]

Thank you. 🎶

[@jamilacharles5485]

I so sorry for you and your sweet family

[@krasimirastankova4832]

Thank you!

[@mayaportland8805]

Yeah people can victimize children and yes people do that all the time. Children are the most helpless, they really have no ability to defend themselves physically or emotionally from abuses. Why you think there are so many messesd up grown-up around?

[@johnlynch575]

2:22 then again;: there is always "on second thought" .while it is not possible to retract a thrown stone, one can always clarify where it is meant to LAND. Lovin Thursdays.

[@solleme3646]

And when you want to be a teacher-for others , them don’t listen nothing ! Only words words ... nobody want to learn nothing! Everybody, tgey learn - in their experience directly from LIFE ! Who want to learn ... is blessing! How many people they are AWARE???

[@lawrencetendler2342]

Such wise words....wow !

[@Rina-rs6up]

So happy to find this teaching today.Greetings to all Chabad in Salem Oregon from Karye Dianne Rina in Williamsburg Virginia.

[@silvianelehmann8702]

Thanks you very much more love.

[@randirosehooper8315]

You sir are amazing

[@snoo333]

thank you

[@CHJazzman]

What about, "Practice makes perfect?" Practice enables improvement.

[@francisfischer7620]

Very helpful.

[@sharanbailey4468]

I love you Rabbi

[@mirellemoscow930]

This is so madly insightful!!! Wow!!!!! I have a question. How do I handle being God’s victim????

[@davidstitzer1641]

Remember that what ever God does is for the good ...God doesn't do bad ....I recently lost my mother....as hard as it was...the kadish prayer ....which is all praise...let's me see that everything is in His hands..God tests us and he tests hard sometimes...but remember this is only a test to build our faith in God or turn away from making the right choice...which is to accept Gods will as always good

[@drjoeppan]

What to do if I lost my trust in someone, and feel that am going to get back stabbing from the same person?? Already got countless times 😊 thanks

[@haniyeserajian5176]

But if you don't protest of their bad behavior they think that you don't understand, and keep doing and make a habit of that.

[@avazworld6549]

True and my greatest lessons in life is to let God deal with the evil. Since some people get pleasure in watching me suffer

[@rucksackransack]

Ava'Z World "Trust on Hashem but tie up your camel. "

[@lovenlightman]

@@avazworld6549 if u do not protect ur self from the bully he will keep on bullying u, meantaly or physicaly. U dont fight back,or talk back they will keep coming at u. Fid help does who are brave enough to fight back. Thats my expirience from being bullied , only fighting back stoped it.

[@sheri88888888]

Sometimes those that you tell about the bad things happening are in on it.

[@sheri88888888]

@@lovenlightman I have had that happen to me too. That is why I said you have to try not to hurt people. Obviously you cant let people hurt you . It is an almost natural reaction to duck or move out of the line of fire. If you think that is not going to be enough to let you get out of there then I do believe you can do something about it.This reminds me of when I had a boyfriend who used to beat me up. One time he was gonna punch me in the face. Not where I could move or duck out of the way .He had me held up against a wall heater holding my neck with one hand and pulling back his fist to punch me. I braced myself thinking this was gonna be a really bad punch.I was thinking God please help me .Next thing I saw was my boyfriend on his knees holding his shoulder and crying ,"ahhh it hurts." It seems his shoulder or arm dislocated. Maybe God grabbed his arm to stop him causing his shoulder to dislocate.I then took the chance to run.

[@krisdavis8405]

Wonderful advise.

[@MitzvosGolem1]

Sometimes people that hurt you didn't mean to..or didn't realize they did .. And are sorry... I am ..I didnt mean to.. And am sorry... Shalom

[@loveleah...]

💖❤️

[@emmanuelamana4128]

THANK

[@blakepreston9108]

Good advice