How to improve sleep when you don't feel sleepy and don't know how to get sleepy

Sometimes people tell me that they feel they can't improve their sleep because they just don't get sleepy enough for sleep. If you are one of these people, there is still hope for you!
Usually, the best thing to do if you don't feel sleepy enough for sleep is to wait until you do feel sleepy for sleep.
Related video:
Why you should stay out of bed until you feel sleepy even when following a short sleep window: • Why you should stay ou...
However, if you find that you go for a day or more of no sleep before you feel sleepy and are able to sleep, then there are still some things you can do.
Related video:
What to do when you go through an endless cycle of bad sleep followed by better sleep: • What to do when you go...
First, I would suggest implementing sleep restriction - a core component of cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I) techniques. By allotting a consistent and appropriate amount of time for sleep, you can help build sleep drive and this can help you feel sleepy and recognize sleepiness cues.
Related video:
How sleep restriction can improve sleep even when you're only getting a few hours of sleep: • How sleep restriction ...
If you have been implementing sleep restriction for a few weeks and still aren't regularly recognizing sleepiness, this could be because your arousal system is overriding sleep drive and/or suppressing sleepiness cues.
Related videos:
Why CBT-I is so effective when worry, anxiety, and a racing mind are fueling your chronic insomnia: • Why CBT-I is so effect...
What to do when you feel sleepy early in the evening but don't feel sleepy when it's time for bed: • What to do when you fe...
When this happens, it can be helpful to take a more 'analytical' approach to CBT-I techniques.
By this, I mean simply engaging your 'robot mind' and following your sleep window. So, if your sleep window is midnight to 5:00 AM (for example), you would go to bed at midnight (even if you aren't yet recognizing sleepiness). Then, you would stay in bed for as long as you feel calm and relaxed.
If you ever feel anxious or frustrated when awake in bed, get out of bed and give yourself an estimated half-hour or so before returning to bed - and then repeat the process.
Then, no matter how well or how poorly you sleep, try to make sure you are always out of bed by the end of your sleep window.
It's also worth seeing if you can identify any 'sleep drive thieves' - these include daytime naps, morning lie-ins, and engaging in highly physical or mental activities just before bed.
Related videos:
Why you should avoid daytime naps if you have chronic insomnia: • Why you should avoid d...
How to get out of bed at the same time every morning when living with chronic insomnia: • How to get out of bed ...
Finally, it can be very helpful to give yourself a one-hour buffer zone before the start of your sleep window. During this time, engage only in relaxing and enjoyable activities - this can help you unwind, might uncover evidence of sleepiness (such as microsleeps), and help you recognize sleepiness cues.
Related videos:
How a buffer zone can help you fall asleep when you are living with chronic insomnia: • How a buffer zone can ...
Why it's a good idea not to go online or use a phone or tablet just before bed and during the night: • Why it's a good idea n...
How microsleeps influence sleep drive and what you can do about them when you have chronic insomnia: • How microsleeps influe...
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My name is Martin Reed and I am the founder of Insomnia Coach®. I offer sleep coaching services that give people with insomnia all the skills and support they need to enjoy better sleep for the rest of their lives. I also offer a free two-week sleep training course for people with insomnia at insomniacoach.com/sleep-train...
You can also find me here:
Website: insomniacoach.com
Twitter: / insomniacoach
Facebook: / insomniacoach
Instagram: / myinsomniacoach
All content found on the Insomnia Coach KZbin channel is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice or medical treatment and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or other licensed healthcare provider. All content is provided as is, and without warranties.
#insomnia
#sleep

[@InsomniaCoach]

All content found on the Insomnia Coach KZbin channel is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.

[@lizalohan01]

Just knowing there are others out here just like me is somewhat comforting because it feels like such an isolated affliction, like an incurable disease, you almost feel like you're mourning yourself, because you are never the same as your old self... anxiety and insomnia on top of anxiety just about insomnia is a deathly feeling that lasts all day, everyday.

[@peachmelba1000]

Liza, I would invite to think of me, in Nova Scotia, Canada when you think you're alone in sleep issues. You're not alone. My name is Luke btw I have felt all the same feelings as you; the same fears, frustrations, etc.

[@wednesdayschild3627]

Just listening to Martin makes me feel sleepy. I watch I'm when I have trouble sleeping. Now I am conditioned to get sleepy when I see him.

[@InsomniaCoach]

Mission accomplished!

[@toniwithani2439]

His voice is putting me to sleep

[@InsomniaCoach]

I'll take that as a compliment, Toni!

[@desireeross9651]

This is helpful. Thank you. I’ll follow this as I go days without proper sleep

[@okay4403]

I am a close friend of someone with very bad insomnia which he's had for over 10 years. He has found this channel and thoroughly enjoys it and has found it hopeful and helpful. I want to thank you for putting out this free information, posting so frequency, and being so clear and thorough. Your care based approach is fantastic. I hope you feel that your time on earth is incredibly valuable and that you are making a profound impact on so many lives. Thank you!

[@InsomniaCoach]

Wow, your words really mean a lot to me. Thank you for sharing. It's a real privilege to know that I am helping so many people I have never even met!

[@tombellamy4857]

@@InsomniaCoach I'm also one of them people you never met. I've mentioned it a few times on your other videos that you cured my 20 years of chronic insomnia. Everytime I hear of someone having insomnia I send them straight to your channel.

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@tombellamy4857 I really appreciate that. Thank you.

[@michellelogan-nelson8966]

​@@tombellamy4857 do you mind me asking how did you cure yourself from insomnia?

[@jennifersamuels2979]

Thank god for your videos! I can’t afford you right now as a full-time coach although I would like to and I’m trying to find a way. Your videos have been a godsend to me I’m going to start in the sleep restriction tonight. But you have brought me so much peace of mind I will be forever grateful

[@InsomniaCoach]

That means a lot to me, Jennifer. Thank you for sharing!

[@luvnerd50]

Great video and info. So grateful

[@InsomniaCoach]

Thank you for your kind words - you are welcome!

[@modupeoluwaadebayo6046]

Your videos were life saver

[@InsomniaCoach]

Thanks for sharing!

[@johnlant1730]

Thank you so much for this! I feel really positive about this strategy. I’ve always been kind of a night owl and forcing myself to bed to early seems to have caused more harm than good. Excited to implement this advice.

[@InsomniaCoach]

Thanks for sharing, John! I'd love to know how you get/got on with it!

[@sl4983]

Update?

[@ZyrexShorts129]

Thank you so much for this you are helping a lot people that suffers from insomnia just like me💙 you said at the end that even thou i feel like I havent slept but then I feel calmed and relaxed then more likely sleep happened but I just didnt notice it, please dont stop making videos💙

[@InsomniaCoach]

I am so happy to know you found this video helpful! I have no intention to stop making videos - plenty more to come!

[@backwood2203]

Did you recover from Insonima?

[@ellenled]

When I started CBTI, I wanted to be 100% compliant so I tried not going to bed until I felt sleepy. The restricted sleep window wasn't an issue because in my case, the 5.5 hours was actually double what I usually got! I did resent stimulus control a little---not the getting out of bed when I couldn't sleep but never reading in bed, but quickly grew to be okay with it. The problem was that I never felt sleepy, even 18 to as much as 30+ hours after getting no sleep. So my little "cheat" would be as you are now saying, to go to bed during the sleep window and lay there for as long as it was pleasurable/tolerable and then get up to do SC again. Since I felt I was cheating, I didn't even do this at the start of my sleep window---more like hours later, when I accepted it was going to be a sleepless night but I was bored reading and just wanted to experience my bed for a few minutes to have a little bit of a nighttime experience. At that point I wasn't going back with the intention of sleeping but to escape the confinment of the sunroom, which was becoming a secondary place of pain and fear---just like the bed. So by going back to the bed for a little bit, I lessened the negative association with the bed and it become a temporary escape. Some nights I fell asleep for a little bit, other nights not and then it was back to the sunroom for the remainder of the night. But then one night a few weeks in I got a head nod while reading---something I hadn't experienced in a year of insomnia. It convinced me I had some natural sleep ability and I started to make progress. Now, months later, I still don't experience much sleepiness the way most people would define it (can't keep eyes open, nodding off). Only occasionally my book drops. So I've learned to look for much more subtle signs, like a heaviness beneath my eyes, even if they aren't closing, or yawning or feeling like my brain is tamping down just a little. If it's within what was my buffer zone when doing CBTI with you, I will go back to the bedroom (still reading on the sunroom couch before bed---I grew to like this private time and place!) and can fall asleep within 15 minutes. Occasionally I have to get up and try again in half an hour. It's worth it to try, now that I don't get frustrated/upset by not falling asleep. After all, there are times I start eating a meal when I don't really think I'm hungry and then I realized I was, so it may work that way with sleep as well. I'm not truly bothered by the lack of sleepiness. Before the hyperarousal was so intense there was no way to feel any sleepiness. Now I am sure it is gone, but I just don't get sleepy 16 to 17 hours after waking, like most people. It takes me 18+ hours, even with short sleeping of 5.5 to 6 hours. What's so helpful for me now is, instead of hoping/waiting/anxiously looking for signs of sleepiness, I calmly assess the situation: "I'm not sleepy---YET." Those three little letters make all the difference. You're not doing ridiculous positive affirmations like "I'm a great sleeper" or "I can feel myself starting to get sleepy." You're assessing the current situation. It's a fact. You recognize and accept that you aren't sleepy. But you break the bullying insomnia cycle by not going on to catastrophize that you'll never sleep. It's fact that you will---it just won't be when you'd like. By saying "YET," you are reassuring yourself that sleep will eventually come. This practice coincides beautifully with doing a body scan and other mindful practices. With a body scan, you calmly and without judgment observe what you are feeling in your body. You can experience pain less or in a way where you suffer less by doing this, and that applies to the psychic pain of insomnia. So when I tell myself I am not sleepy---YET it doesn't frighten me or send me into telling stories about the dire future I will have (the next day and the rest of my life) because I'm not getting the amount of sleep I might have preferred to get or that most people get. It becomes no different than noticing that your right knee feels a little tight or your left jaw is a little sore.

[@InsomniaCoach]

Thank you so much for contributing with your experience, Ellen! Three key points stood out for me here - the first was that "one night" (after a few weeks of nothing) when you experienced a head nod. Such an otherwise insignificant moment, but one which had huge repercussions in changing your entire attitude and belief system about your ability to sleep. The second big insight was your recognition that you just don't need as much sleep as you first perhaps thought. As you pointed out, some of us can do just fine on five or six hours of sleep - putting pressure on ourselves to get more sleep than we need only makes sleep more difficult. Finally, your acceptance of sleep (something along the lines of "whatever sleep I get is the sleep I get") is a third big insight - I love how you refer to insomnia as a bully because if we starve a bully of the attention it craves, it will often get bored and move on. Thanks again for sharing your story, Ellen.

[@karolinakp6327]

Ellen Lederman are you still getting better ?

[@jaeholix5262]

Thank you for sharing your experience!

[@flow2tech]

@@InsomniaCoach Yes, this was very significant..This insight puts it more in perspective for me....

[@unassailable6138]

30 hours not sleeepng? lol . Im on day #3 of not sleeping and still dont feel sleepy

[@monikavarro2020]

Anxious tossing and turning. That's me! 😂😂😂

[@InsomniaCoach]

Ugh - sorry to hear that. Anxious tossing and turning definitely is not pleasant - I wonder if a more appealing alternative would be getting out of bed to do something a bit more enjoyable?

[@konnichiwow3139]

I got sleep problems from anxeity and panic attacks/indigestion, i got this mindset that its okay if i wont get a good sleep tonight, i can manage the effects tomorrow, so i tried to lay on the bed then close my eyes, i did not notice that i slept, but i can remember i had 2 dreams, but its wierd now that i dont fell sleepy since im like having only 3-4hours of sleep for 3 weeks now, its exhausting but i need to accept this is happening.

[@InsomniaCoach]

Thanks for sharing! If you are dreaming then you are sleeping! You might find this video on "sleep state misperception" helpful: kzbin.info/www/bejne/p2fMg5mKaJ2jg7s

[@lilleok.9377]

Would CBTI also work for someone who does sleep 8 hours but wakes up still tired- where there is no major sleep interruption but for some reason the quality of sleep is pretty bad.

[@InsomniaCoach]

That's a tough one to answer with certainty. If someone is mainly sedentary during the day and spending a lot longer than eight hours in bed this could contribute to a feeling of unrefreshing sleep, but I'd encourage such an individual to talk to their doctor just to rule out any other potential cause (such as sleep apnea, for example).

[@unassailable6138]

Hi Martin, I am on hyperarousal, lol. 3 Days and not a single second of sleep. It's near bedtime, I will try again. Hope I can get at least 15 minutes or 1 hour of sleep because then I'll know my brain is still working. I will follow your tips: dont care about sleep, increase sleep pressure, awakened time, etc.

[@InsomniaCoach]

How are you getting on? I am not sure it's possible to make ourselves not care about something that's important to us - trying to control the mind in this way can sometimes make things a bit more difficult!

[@lillianyoukhana8451]

How are you doing now

[@unassailable6138]

@@lillianyoukhana8451 Im sleeping 10 hours a night again. Just eat carbs and exercise sleep will slowly come back

[@soniczforever5470]

Love your videos but have noticed an odd fact and have a question. I sometimes suspect suspect I got none I wonder if I do I'm getting1- 3 hours some nights. Sometimes I noticed a change in position like lying on back to sideways and dont remember. It also happens during day. Either on couch or in bed. Could I have fallen asleep during this time.I sometimes lie down during the day as I've headaches. My insomnia is severe enough and working on lifestyle changes.

[@InsomniaCoach]

Since it's quite difficult to go without any sleep for longer than a night or two, and since you are noticing a change in body position, it does sound as though at least some sleep is happening!

[@stephwong9833]

Your YT video has helped me understand ACT-I and that sleep requires no effort and that sleep WILL come! Currently I am unable to stay up past 9:30pm and have to head to bed. I will wake up in the middle of the night and it will take between 30mins-1hr to fall asleep again. After that my body will automatically wake at 5am and I will stay in bed and try to get an another or two out of it. I would like to get 7-8hours of rested sleep without waking up, how do I do that?

[@InsomniaCoach]

Thanks for the feedback! Does your experience tell you that it's possible to make 7-8 hours of rested sleep without waking up happen? Perhaps the pursuit of that goal might be making things more difficult? What would you be doing differently with your life if you got that amount/type of sleep?

[@elifonder9378]

Do you have any suggestions for new mums with messed up body clocks? (Consistent schedule is out the window) My baby is 11 months old, he used to be a terrible sleeper now he sleeps better but I get 4 hours sleep in total because I'm simply not sleepy... I just toss and turn in bed after 4-5 am. Last night he woke up once in the middle of the night for no reason, I gave him his dummy he fell back asleep and that's it for me. I started my day at 2.50 am! I tried reading, relaxation techniques just nothing works! Today is my birthday and I started my day in tears from exhaustion because I had 3 hours sleep. When is my brain going to realise that I need more than 4 hours sleep? :(

[@InsomniaCoach]

If your baby is no longer the reason why your sleep is disrupted, then we would usually address the insomnia in the same way we address other cases of insomnia - by identifying and addressing the thought processes and behaviors that perpetuate sleep disruption once the initial trigger is no longer present or relevant. You might want to start by enrolling in my free sleep training course: insomniacoach.com/sleep-training/

[@roadgliders]

Been on CBT-I starting my 5th week. Tapered off Zolpidem 10 mg and got off them taking almost 4 months. Very poor sleep during that time. Then started CBT-I and I feel I am failing very badly. First week was avg just over 3 hours (5 hour sleep window which was almost double my actual sleep from the prior weeks during the tapering of Zolp) and the following 3 weeks hovering around 4 hours a night/week. With many days of 0 sleep in a row per week. Best week was at 65% efficiency, but this is likely being "cheated" as I only get in bed IF I know I will fall asleep as I've given up trying to follow my window as it's WAY too long. And when I say 0, I know I am at 0 hours sleep as I do not stay in bed, I just get up and drive around until the sun comes up. I am running out of ideas and not sure I can keep this going much longer. I hate this so much...

[@InsomniaCoach]

How are you getting on since you posted, Johnny? I wonder if things were feeling particularly difficult when you wrote this comment because you might be actively trying to control sleep? For as long as our goal is to control something that cannot be controlled, perhaps we are setting ourselves up for an ongoing struggle?

[@roadgliders]

@@InsomniaCoach I have given up trying to fix my insomnia. After another almost 4 weeks of trying CBT-I, I did finally get rest but I am almost 100% sure it's not insomnia. I think I have delayed sleep phase disorder. After I posted my comment, I gave up trying to follow a sleep window since I was always trying to go to bed and wake up with societal norms. Wake up time of between 6-8 am for example. Any time I would try to adjust my sleep to be "normal", I would go for a full 2 days without sleep and then slowly repeat the pattern. I started just going to bed when tired (which is between 5-7 am) and sleep 6-7 hours fine. I tested this for 3 weeks and each week I would try on Monday to bring myself into line by staying up from noon (my normal wake up time after going to bed at 5 am) and staying up until a 11 PM bed time. What would happen is I would go the full night awake (lack of sleep drive by that point), then I would force myself to stay awake until Tuesday 11 pm and I would finally crash. Then I would try to go to bed on Wednesday day at 11pm but wouldn't and would go until 5-6 am Thursday and then go to bed. If I didn't try to keep correcting, I would be good for the rest of the week at 5am to noon sleep. So, I don't think I have insomnia, I just was using the pills to regulate my sleep/wake cycle to match normal and since I couldn't match without the pills, it was initially diagnosed as insomnia since I could not sleep. I have booked an appointment with a sleep specialist to confirm IF I have DSPD and if so, can my DSPD can be corrected, but that won't be until Sept. So I am just going to get back on my pills since I am missing so much of my life/wife until my appointment is done, then I will restart anew and see where it leads.

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@roadgliders Thanks for sharing - I wish you all the best! It would be great if you could return with an update, if you feel comfortable doing so, after seeing the sleep specialist.

[@roadgliders]

@@InsomniaCoach I seem to be back to where I started and now my pills will not put me down at all. Guess with all my testing proving that I CAN sleep "normally" from 5-7 am, now the pills cannot bring my sleep back in line with societal norms. 4 days on my 10 mg doze of Zolpidem and 1st day was ok, second took 2 hours to go down, 3rd 0 hours sleep. I think I am going to give up on hobbies/life in general. So much for my family get away, riding my motorcycle across the US/Canada, since this cannot be accomplished safely on 2 hours of sleep a night weekly average. Might as well sell my bike and my wife's since she only likes to ride when she's with me. I am such a failure...

[@ElenaRata-iv5pk]

@@roadglidershope you’re doing much better now .

[@colinpatrick2729]

Hi Martin What does it mean if you have not slept at all for a month but still do not feel sleepy at night just really groggy and fatigued during the day. Surely sleep drive would have taken over by now. Also where does hyperarousal come from anxiety, brain stem areas. Can your sleep areas be broken?

[@InsomniaCoach]

Hello Colin! First of all, it would not be possible to go without any sleep for a month - some kind of sleep would be happening over such a long period. Feeling groggy and fatigued is a common symptom of chronic insomnia - have you been diagnosed with chronic insomnia? If so, the first-line treatment is usually cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I). Here's an overview of CBT-I: insomniacoach.com/cognitive-behavioral-therapy-insomnia/

[@sl4983]

Umm yeah you might want to try and zolpidem. Why are you torturing yourself

[@mrfernandog123]

I've gone about a month and half no sleep.. it's possible. My body feels so tired but there's no sleepiness/:

[@abitameem9895]

Me at 5 am watching how to feel sleepy

[@InsomniaCoach]

I hope the video was helpful!

[@desimemes9351]

How r u now?

[@meokathmeo9671]

I have a question. If I can't sleep all night and luckily feel sleepy at daytime. Should I take that advantage to go to sleep? Thank you

[@leravolkova4605]

What can you do when you develop a habit of falling asleep at 3 or 4am, but want to shift the sleep window to earlier hours of the night? I've been trying to get my body to start feeling sleepy just after 11pm, but have had no success, and I'm struggling to understand how just getting out of bed and waiting for the sleepiness to come would help shift that sleep window. On the nights where sleepiness seems to come more effortlessly, I'm dealing with constant hypnic jerks, which makes the sleepiness go away entirely.

[@ElenaRata-iv5pk]

I had them for couple of nights (hypnic jerks)it will pass and if you want to go back to the regular hours you go backwards 15 minutes weekly until will go back to normal schedule time.

[@privateprivate2421]

I never feel sleepy. I've had insomnia for 26yrs. Now I don't sleep at all. Even though my body craves sleep. Sleep restriction doesn't work for me as my mind immediately accepts that's my new sleep pattern. How different we all are.

[@InsomniaCoach]

Yikes! How long have you not slept at all for? As in not even a minute of sleep?

[@desimemes9351]

Are u doing better now?

[@mrfernandog123]

@@InsomniaCoach i believe this man... I'm currently about 1 month and a half of no sleep.. I might getting an hour or so where I don't notice but yeah it's pretty bad.. it almost feels like my brain just forgot to sleep

[@twodeadpxls]

​@@mrfernandog123Have you improved at all since then?

[@tamamarica88]

Hi Martin. I just want to say Thank u. I had insomnia from childhood,now i found out that i have delayed sleep syndrome..because i can fall a sleep..but after 05am.. I thought that i will be like this my hole life...and now i know about cbt-i...and u. And im going to try it. But ur videos made me cry from happiness last night...u gave me hope. The one thing that i didnt have. And also,the way u calm us..its amazing. Right now..im so ok with my sleep problems..im not anxious anymore when the night comes.. i enjoy my "me time" during night until 4:30am..and then i go to bed calm...and i fall a sleep sooo fast its amazing. I just had to stop making myself sleep early...and accept that i sleep different than most of the world. I will try to shift a little bit my start so that i dont sleep till noon. But if not...thats ok too. U are really kind soul. And Im so thankful that i found u. And I hope u have a lot of clients... U deserve to live great from this work ♥️

[@InsomniaCoach]

Wow, thank you so much for sharing, Tamara! I really appreciate your kind words :)

[@helynschmid]

Do you address in any of your videos what should be done if you get sleepy around 9pm but sleep restriction says not until hours later... only to not be sleepy at all after passing up this opportunity to actually fall asleep??

[@InsomniaCoach]

It sounds like this is the video you're looking for, Helyn: What to do when you feel sleepy early in the evening but don't feel sleepy when it's time for bed - kzbin.info/www/bejne/laCQqmtmndhkbMU

[@halisyamohd1122]

Hai, i have chronic insomnia where I can’t sleep at night nor day for 6 months. In malaysia there are no cbt-i. I don’t know what else to do. Kindly advice

[@InsomniaCoach]

It's possible to implement CBT-I techniques independently - my free sleep training course can help with that: insomniacoach.com/sleep-training/

[@desimemes9351]

How r u now?

[@susanobrien9917]

My longest without sleep and I mean NO sleep not even eyes closing other than blinking ( doing sleep restriction and refusing to go to bed until I'm sleepy and refusing to take sleep medication) the next is 73 hours it's always AT THE LEAST 48 hours my husband hates when I try this but I hate taking prescribed medication. I have severe chronic insomnia so much so that even with sleep medication I often do not get sleepy and am up for over 24 hours every other week or so) I have had this since I was a child) and it has effected every aspect of my life I can make my own work schedule now (I'm 58 and can work from home thankfully)but when I worked 8 to 6 it destroyed me!!!! There is absolutely NOTHING I have not tried!!! I have zero caffeine intake. I do relaxation therapy sound machine sleep tapes no tv in my room I give myself two hours of reading before the time I'd like to go to sleep The problem is my mind NEVER stops my thoughts are constantly running, often thinking about three to four things at once (song running in my head food store list things I have to do concerns and worries about EVERYTHING!!!!) when I do fall asleep I wake up with the fight or flight response with such anxiety I get so nauseous, then if I'm lucky I can calm myself more often I'm awake and will read until I feel slightly sleepy (sometimes it's four or five hours)then can get another couple of hours if I'm lucky this is just how it's been I can't remember but maybe three times in my life where I slept through the night 😢 meanwhile my husband falls asleep in under three minutes and often sleeps through the night🤷‍♀️

[@InsomniaCoach]

That sounds difficult! Do you think the ongoing (and understandable!) trying might be the source of some of the struggle you described?

[@soft566]

Read about magic mushrooms. I had insomnia 18years from rotating nights days shift work. Tried everything else. Problems 90% better now.

[@goh9913]

Hi I'm on a 36 -hour cycle, meaning I have only slept every 2-days. I cant feel sleepy on alternate nights. Only occasionally I had managed to sleep (fragmented) on alternate night. After that I found the following night became my sleepless night. Help

[@InsomniaCoach]

This video might be helpful: How to stop the sleep roller coaster and make sleep more consistent and more predictable - kzbin.info/www/bejne/bmfUdZKJe7WXaJY

[@ghulamarshed1727]

Thanks much coach. Because I feel relaxed being on the bed so I don't leave the bed until my wake up time. However, when I leave the bed I feel as if I didn't sleep at all and during the day I feel sleepiness and exhausted. How long it will take before I feel like I rested well and feel not exhausted during the daytime?

[@InsomniaCoach]

Sometimes, the more active we are during the day, the less fatigued we feel - so that might be something to explore!

[@poojachhatwani]

Sameeeeee happens with me

[@desimemes9351]

@@poojachhatwani are you doing well now?

[@poojachhatwani]

@@desimemes9351 Hi! Not great actually. I still have insomnia it's been a year. I'm seeing a psychiatrist. I have general anxiety also which no doubt translates into performance anxiety when it comes to sleep. Meds are obviously helping. I hate taking them and at the same time anxious about them as well but I guess if that's the only thing keeping me alive and helping me atleast 10% to build a career rn. I know the root cause that it's anxiety only but I wish it was that easy to control your mind.

[@MohammedMiara]

I really like to watch things on my phone, do you recommend that if i can’t fall asleep?

[@InsomniaCoach]

Phones can sometimes be a bit distracting what with easy access to messaging apps, emails, social media, games, etc, etc, etc - but if you find using a phone helps you relax and unwind, and doesn't seem to interfere with sleep, then I don't think there's any need to stop using your phone!

[@MohammedMiara]

@@InsomniaCoach thank you

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@MohammedMiara You're welcome!

[@sumitrajput2777]

❤❤

[@gingerisevil02]

I have insomnia as a symptom of ptsd.. I have hyper arousal.

[@emad7540]

I don’t feel sleepy at all not during the day nor during the night, I use sleeping pills to sleep, I can’t stay awake at night after half hour if don’t asleep I immediately take my sleeping pills when I wake up I feel really tired and feel really frustrated because I use sleeping pills to fall asleep, I have been suffering from this about a year now and I started forgiving things I just did, I don’t know what to do

[@InsomniaCoach]

What do you think would happen if you didn't take any sleeping pills for, say, seven days in a row? Do you think you still wouldn't get any sleep at all? Or, do you think sleep would happen eventually? If you are keen to get off the sleeping pills you might want to ask your doctor about cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I), which has been proven to be a more effective long-term treatment for chronic insomnia.

[@paml.6101]

@@InsomniaCoach I've been off Lunesta for a week and I did wake therapy to purge myself off of them. Now I'm dealing with anxiety about sleeping and tossing and turning and I don''t feel that sleepy. Please help. I don't want to take anything for sleep. I've been on lunesta for at least 10 years off and on anywhere for 1.5 to 3mg and sometimes had to take a higher does because of waking wide awake. I wish I never would have started, the reason was for work schedule and then it was just easy to take them when is was going thru some stressful personal matters.

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@paml.6101 Congratulations on getting off the Lunesta! If you don't feel sleepy, perhaps you just aren't sleepy enough for sleep at that time? You might find it helpful to explore what it is about the idea of not being sleepy or of being awake during the night that seems to generate worry/concern. Here's a video about this, "What to do when anxious thoughts are making sleep difficult and leading to insomnia" - kzbin.info/www/bejne/h2PXm4CNq6eUjdU

[@user-mp9lq3xv5b]

How is your sleeping now ?

[@jenniferm6502]

My pattern for 10+ years is stay up 1-2 nights then crash for one night. I don't feel sleepy ever. Failed CBTi twice with a very expensive therapist. No one seems to be able to help :( I've just been told I have treatment-resistant insomnia and there is no help for me :(

[@charkitte]

I am so sorry to hear this but do not believe that you have treatment-resistant insomnia! There is a solution for every problem! Don't give up! Concentrate on truly loving yourself and that the undeniable fact that you are truly deserving of sleeping well.

[@rajatsharma6504]

It's been 1 year.. and I thing I have somethinike insomnia I can't sleep or I sleep around 5 or 6 in the morning.. I can't handle this pain. 😭😭😭

[@InsomniaCoach]

You can definitely sleep, Rajat! Have you tried implementing any of the techniques I talk about in my videos?

[@desimemes9351]

How r u now bro?

[@kara4590]

I sleep at my house very well Just day before I go to work cant sleep ,how to deal with this

[@InsomniaCoach]

That's very common and can often occur due to two main reasons - we might stay in bed or sleep in the day before returning to work and/or we might put more pressure on ourselves to sleep on the night before work. Do any of these seem relevant to you?

[@kara4590]

@@InsomniaCoach I think I put more pressure on my self to sleep.

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@kara4590 It's great that you have identified that - when we put pressure on ourselves to sleep, we make sleep more difficult since sleep doesn't respond well to effort, and sleep cannot be controlled. All we can do is create good conditions for sleep.

[@jocelynmuch]

I have been doing CBTI for three days and when I started it my sleep has gotten way worse. I was getting around 5hrs total sleep prior to starting. First night of cbti I slept in my sleep window a fragmented 3-4 hrs, night two 1-2 hrs and night three medicated I slept 3 hrs and decided not to get up out of bed every time I couldn’t sleep because it was overwhelming. Is this normal for CBTI in the beginning? Should I keep going? I tried literally everything to keep my sleep hygiene in check and did the relaxation before bed. Help!

[@InsomniaCoach]

It's not unusual for sleep to get worse in the short-term as you adjust to the changes you're making. You might find this video helpful: What to do when CBT for insomnia (CBT-I) makes your sleep worse not better - kzbin.info/www/bejne/jKjPipyNZ8iMmZY

[@Rosie-wj1le]

I get 3 hours of sleep no matter what technique I try. It’s now 2:21 am and I’m wide awake. So I got on my iPad and listened but no sleep.

[@InsomniaCoach]

I wonder what would happen without the "trying"?

[@backwood2203]

I had Insonima for 4 months now sometimes I go to sleep for 4 or 1 hr and most nights I don't get no sleep

[@InsomniaCoach]

Sorry to hear that - I hope you find some ideas on the channel that might prove to be helpful!

[@desimemes9351]

How r u now?

[@backwood2203]

@@desimemes9351 I'm way better but some nights I still don't get no sleep I go to sleep around 11 and get up around 7 or 8 when I work I get up around 5:30 do you have insomnia?

[@desimemes9351]

@@backwood2203 i dont know but i didn't sleep from last two nights properly So what should i do any idea?

[@backwood2203]

@@desimemes9351 try staying up until you get tired don't lay in bed if u can't sleep

[@samanthathompson9812]

This is my problem. I can be utterly sickeningly exhausted from lack of sleep and yet not sleepy.

[@user-xy7ok4np9x]

How much do you sleep per night

[@InsomniaCoach]

Was there anything helpful in this video?

[@samanthathompson9812]

@@InsomniaCoach yes there's something helpful in all your videos. I do find the term "sleepy" problematic when most sleep therapists use it, as that nice drowsy state is not one I ever really get to much. It's not as simple as just staying out of bed until I feel drowsy as I never do. Sometimes I'm so exhausted I can hardly sit up, so I'd rather lie down even of I can't sleep. But I think you understand this better than most. "Tired and wired" as you said elsewhere.

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@samanthathompson9812 Thanks for sharing.

[@johnsmusicpassions9740]

is it better to read a book rather than watch movies or tv shows to generate that sleepiness before sleep window

[@InsomniaCoach]

I don't think it matters too much, to be honest. I'd suggest allowing your own experience to be your guide here. If your experience tells you that you get far too wired watching movies or TV at night, then that might be something to move away from. If your experience tells you it doesn't matter too much then it's probably not something you need to worry about.

[@LordFprquad]

Hello I'm 16 and I play videogames on the daily but a couple months ago I haven't been starting to feel sleepy and feel as if I have to force myself to sleep. I don't feel sleepy at all and I've been concerned for my sleep

[@InsomniaCoach]

Sometimes we might not feel sleepy when we go to bed, but we might still fall asleep. If that's the case for you, there's probably no need to change anything! If you find that it's hard to fall asleep when you go to bed before you feel sleepy, it might be worth waiting until you are feeling sleepy before going to bed. Sooner or later, sleepiness (and sleep) will happen! Some video games can be quite stimulating and that might mask sleepiness symptoms if you play really close to bedtime. I hope this helps!

[@LordFprquad]

@@InsomniaCoach I've been watching your videos a lot and I do feel sleepy I just feel like I don't get enough sleep. I don't get that grogginess like I used to when I wake up and I don't get sleepy throughout the afternoon I sometimes would take afternoon naps. And also before I would get really sleepy to the point that if I was on my phone i would fall asleep right away 😴

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@LordFprquad I would suggest talking to your doctor about these concerns. Usually, if we feel sleepy, fall asleep pretty well, don't spend a whole lot of time awake during the night, and feel pretty good during the day we are probably getting enough sleep.

[@LordFprquad]

@@InsomniaCoach idk but like when I wake up I don't get groggy like I used to so yeah and as for the getting sleepy, last night I went to sleep at like 3:47 am and still didn't feel as tired but I went to sleep anyways

[@desimemes9351]

@@LordFprquad how r u now?

[@saikatpaul6576]

Is it true that sleeping effect insulin

[@InsomniaCoach]

That would be a question for your doctor!

[@saikatpaul6576]

@@InsomniaCoach it effects my arousal

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@saikatpaul6576 I hope you are able to get some answers from your doctor!

[@strictlynotraitors8004]

I've had insomnia from severe stress and worry since January. I was then put on antipsychotics to help me sleep, which I came off over 2 weeks ago. I have not slept for 15 days now. I am so tired and I still cant sleep nor do I feel sleepy. Can CBTi help me? I feel so helpless and hopeless as doctors arent taking me seriously. I feel so sad and alone.

[@rubenkotze74]

Its impossible not to sleep for 15 days your body would have set in small sleep momemts which you are maybe unaware of but 15 days is impossible you would die

[@teresahoang6593]

Me too have problem with insomnia is so bad and tired

[@strictlynotraitors8004]

@@rubenkotze74 Impossible? Have you ever had 'Medicine induced' insomnia? I used to think its 'impossible' too until I experienced it myself

[@strictlynotraitors8004]

@@rubenkotze74 Olanzapine is a notorious drug, there's some patients who have gone months without sleep after coming off that drug. Its ruins your sleep cycle

[@InsomniaCoach]

I would suggest asking your doctor if they think you'd be a good candidate for CBT-I. Since CBT-I techniques help create better conditions for sleep by tackling the thoughts and behaviors that can perpetuate sleep disruption, it's likely you'll find this helpful - but since you have taken antipsychotics in the past, I'd suggest discussing this with your doctor first.

[@kevinfun6630]

How can one not be hyperaroused during the night?

[@InsomniaCoach]

I don't think we can actively control that - at least, not for the long term. I think it can be more helpful to accept the presence of hyperarousal rather than trying to fight it or control it - since that's when we usually get really tangled up in it.

[@kevinfun6630]

@@InsomniaCoach for those who are experiencing paradoxical insomnia, is it possible for them to fix this issue or are they doomed to experience this for the rest of their lives?

[@InsomniaCoach]

@@kevinfun6630 Here's a video about paradoxical insomnia that might be helpful: kzbin.info/www/bejne/p2fMg5mKaJ2jg7s

[@mystage11]

I fall asleep around 5:00 am 😤😤😤😤😤😭😭😭😭

[@thurayao1457]

How to sleep in 2 min when you’re not sleepy

[@InsomniaCoach]

I don't think that's possible - since sleep isn't something we can directly control or make happen upon command.