How to Make Friends and Meet People in FFXIV

[@preciousshatterings177]

Me, a solo player, who’s a shy wreck: *Pulls out a notebook.* “Ah, I see, hm, very good very good.”

[@Grimdawn95]

You're not alone, hope you're having fun with the game :)

[@tspruell94]

oh hey we share notebooks! dope 🤣

[@RealBentusiII]

same

[@rubyb2183]

I’m only really social in games tbh.

[@jadedallion8107]

I feel ya *5 notebooks and a clipboard*.

[@MCWilson]

Also: "Go into a town, walk into a stranger's house, and strike up a conversation" is the most Final Fantasy thing imaginable

[@Mawble]

Literally how I made my first friend outside of the group I started playing with lol

[@qarcon3247]

lol i always go to towns and walk in their house and apartments. I've done it almost 50 times and nobody ever home.I always think it will be so awkward to walk in on someone

[@Rezzmari]

@@qarcon3247 I've walked in on people plenty of times. This only happens because I am going door to door looking at housing decor, haha. Usually I just say hi and say their home looks nice and be on my way. Compliments gives people warm fuzzies, especially if they put a lot of work into decorating. ^^

[@Shiirow]

the most final fantasy thing to do is walk into someones house, rummage through the drawers and closets for gil and items _then_ strike up a conversation.

[@laurakristensen3111]

Now hear me out here. What if this comment was played in court. Judge: "Go into town, walk into a stranger's house, and strike up a conversation."? Mr. Wilson is this why you robbed a family of four and then told them to have a nice day?

[@mariemonte5848]

i was in Q for Dungeon, someone next to me was craftig, i cheer him on, now he is my oldest friend in FF14 XD

[@kujiko88]

It's the little things, lol. Sometimes just following up on random lyrics in shout chat can make a friendship.

[@seniorderpface]

sou sa oretachi ga

[@thehurricane6767]

Haha, yeah. Even the little random cute emotes can brighten your day. My favorite is when I'm waiting on a queue and just start spamming aoes out of boredom and other people changed jobs and do the same thing. Lol. The little things

[@MrProg-ey3tl]

If only it was that simple lol

[@Apanblod]

How old is he?

[@sharidan2214]

*me in main scenario party chat*:Is it wrong that i want Livia to step on me? *gets a friend request*

[@mattland2998]

You have received a player commendation!

[@austinmartin612]

I saw this happen in Shiva lol "Oh dear God yes, step on me!" In chat haha, pretty sure they got a friend request or two

[@thesnowkitsune]

Tbh if I am tanking the Ala Mhigo dungeon I tell my party I will sometimes be in first person to watch Daddy Zenos use me as a punching bag. I either disturb people or get a friend request.

[@arachineatzeer7478]

In E4 and I'm MT I'll tell Titan to step on me, sometimes I get a giggle out of people.

[@HyouVizer]

LOOOOOOL I've gotten friend requests for my character's "sexy" glams lmao

[@angelwolf020]

One way I had made a friend was noticing they were sitting next to me with a cool minion so I decided to say hello and tell them their minion was cute We began talking and then he bought me the same minion for me and we became instant friends We became really close and talked every day outside and inside the game Now we are a couple and I couldn’t have ask for a better way to meet my best friend and love of my life Thanks to Final fantasy 14

[@willsimpsart]

Goddamn

[@McLoven-vm1ck]

It's rare but it happens. I haven't met a love interest but one of my good friends I met through a random clan I had joined. Eventually after forming some friendships I learned one of my friends just happened to live in the same area as me. Now we get to share saving the day online in a virtual world as well as more mundane pursuits such as catching a movie.

[@turnerman6432]

must be nice having friends

[@jamieh5737]

omg I love this!!! hope things are going good for you guys

[@willsimpsart]

Fanboy 3k that is amazing. I’m so jealous

[@Blackened]

Me IRL: don't you dare talk to me Me in XIV: please tell me my glamour is pretty

[@zeterzero4356]

Your glamor is pretty.

[@geminiwolfgaming887]

I'm exactly the same lol

[@furancodensetsu2086]

i find another person like me, yay! 😆

[@dracotias]

umm excuse me but you need the back the hizzle off my mood

[@emjayjozf2292]

Pretty much! Lol

[@coolkumla]

Zepla: "Don't be afraid" welp... i already lost

[@MassisKharne]

Believe me, me too, I get so goddamn terrified that I'm gonna say something stupid because of social anxiety. :( But then I realize that friends love you, despite the dumb things you can say.

[@hopelessly.lavenderly]

it's not about not feeling the fear. it's about doing it anyway. I believe in you! you deserve to have friends! go out and make em!

[@AlexWaff]

Tfw she starts talking about how the game can become unhealthy if you've got nothing else going on in life and you're spending too much time on it and I just Don't attack me like this, gods.

[@pantherman8719]

I dunno. Most ppl have jobs. Not necessarily nothing going on. Unless ppl play 24/7. Its not ffxi lol.

[@m.3.3.w]

@@pantherman8719 I'd just like to get ffxiv running on pc without an error in my patching

[@pantherman8719]

@@m.3.3.w damn that sucks man. ...p...ps4 maybe? :D

[@loranpayne840]

The game is actually one of the healthier things I could do for my mental health/sanity. I have a few chronic illnesses and have been home-bound since High School, and it’s literally the only social interaction I get aside from my sister/parents. When I started missing school all the time and my friends all ditched me (because “out of sight out of mind,” apparently applies to people too lol,) the only social stuff I could even do were with FFXIV friends. And yeah it’s important to not make the game your whole life, but if you are a huge extrovert like me, you take what you can get!

[@CottidaeSEA]

I used to do nothing but play FFXIV and spend time with my girlfriend, who basically did the same. I still couldn't afford raiding. Fuck, that shit is expensive, and you gain pretty much no money while levelling up your secondary classes. Then there's crafting, which these days is somewhat easy and cheap to level, but damn, it used to be horrible.

[@MsLenepigen]

7:47 This part almost made me cry. "You deserve to be treated with kindness." This is very important information and must never be forgotten.

[@breakdancerQ]

Too bad a lot people in the world are not like this, or even the opposite.

[@dj9712db]

Joins dungeon full of catgirls Make it to final boss where I declare he cannot beat my harem Laughs acquired Friends made

[@Konpekikaminari]

*Joins dungeon full of catgirls* DF in a nutshell

[@EihaMudo]

This literally happened to me yesterday but 3 were cats and 4 were Au Ra and Im the only dude (also Au Ra)

[@alguidoemblema153]

I'm a lalafel and was in a dungeon with 3 Lalafels and a Elezen, the Elezen was declared our dad for the entire dungeon

[@Sherolox]

@@alguidoemblema153 I love this. I had the same experience once, where I was the only big guy with a bunch of little lalas.

[@Shmandalf]

I wish I was funny...

[@Joumae]

I saw another player whose last name was the same as mine so I messaged him “Hey. We have the same last name so that means we’re family in some way. Wanna be family?” So now we’re cousins from the Kha clan and talk on a daily basis!

[@joshw1619]

My male aura is named Daemon Kha

[@joshw1619]

Glad I'm not the only one who looks at naming conventions lol

[@Joumae]

@@joshw1619 If you're on Aether, wanna be cousins? *finger guns*

[@EfiXtra]

Wholesome

[@rashidcarter9634]

Thank you for this video. Recently, I was kicked from a dungeon because I didn’t understand the mechanics. No one even tried explaining it to me. Then I thought maybe this game isn’t for me if this is what people will be like. But this helped me realize that there are tons of nice people out there, I just need to ignore the negativity.

[@cici39177]

Heya! I am so sorry you had to experience that. For the most part the FFXIV community is the nicest and most helpful compared to other MMOs. But since its gotten more popular there are the rotten eggs in there. You can add me Ondine Adrie on Lamia. Id be more than happy to help you run dungeons and the only salt I bring is for french fries :p

[@rashidcarter9634]

Cosmetologeek Lol thanks. I’ll send a request when I get on later. I’m Olyver Sin on Exodus

[@pupax2000]

That sounds awful and very much opposite of most FFXIV interactions. Just make sure that you are communicating in the party chat, and people will usually be more than happy to help!

[@papasfritas3853]

Happened to me too, I have had lot of bad experices specially on dungeons, raids, etc. But outside of that part people is generally very nice.

[@ocruz9797]

People forget that we all started at lvl 1. That’s an elitist complex on them. Deep down they ain’t shit. It’s not a you problem, it’s them. Eros Araya is my name on Ultros. Hit me up if u need help.

[@victorb5608]

I got my friend into 14 yesterday and he literally just send friend request to any player with a cute avatar. it’s actually hilarious

[@superunknown2728]

What a man

[@zeterzero4356]

He's literally an anime trope and I love it.

[@Konpekikaminari]

Any player with a cute avatar That's like, 80% of the games population

[@loveliestfawn]

@@Konpekikaminari Most people in ff14 are ugly lol

[@nrdpc5975]

*visits a house, sees a note on the table* "Drink the cup of tea, go downstairs and handcuff yourself to the radiator. uWu"

[@akanishta99]

Thanks for stopping by

[@crucialcatalyst]

I mean. Do I need the stairs? *yeet*

[@SleepEternalPeace]

I go and harvest sprouts and then drive them around in my noctis car and help them through ARR Buy cheap glamours and get glams unlocked For newbs

[@vinny-yj9ln]

Lumina Sin aww as a sprout, i love that🥺

[@jaymeaaron]

I craft things for my sprouts since Gil is tight at the beginning.

[@OB.x]

I love you crazy Noctis Car drivers.

[@skylerdaemon]

Being "kidnapped" by a Noctis car full of Hrothgars cracking dad jokes was my fondest memories as a baby conjurer when I started. They and everyone who roam in those cars in the beginning area are doing good work.

[@Konpekikaminari]

So Virtual sugar daddy/mommy?

[@ureshiiiiii]

As someone who's usually looking for help with stuff, I appreciate these tips :)

[@softwareblade0137]

I feel that happy to help if you want ^^ nott like id be much help lmfao ;)

[@degapalgamer3772]

@@softwareblade0137 what lvl are you?

[@captainwoodring3271]

I have so much social anxiety going on discord :(

[@Selcryn]

Would it help if I pointed out that in most cases no one will require you to have a microphone and that you should be wary of folks who insist that you do when first getting to know you?

[@MrMagicman089]

I play on PS4 and use a controller. Ive been playing for almost a week now, and ive had a couple of players come up to me and “wave” and things like that. By the time ive figured out how to use the comms window, they’ve run off😆

[@arpo_marxx]

If you play on ps4 (I do too) I recommend taking an entire tab to hotkey emotes and making into a sort of (what I call)... an "Rp Tab"

[@LoftyOasis]

Dizz Free that’s a great idea actually, i’m gonna try that! was having same problem as OP

[@crucifixroarband8838]

Same, that’s why I’m thinking of buying a mouse and keyboard specifically for XIV

[@shipou]

You can use the PS Companion app for your keyboard but it’s wonky. You have to open the app, have it connect to the PS4, in game tab to the chat window, press X to bring up the cursor, then press triangle to bring up the PS keyboard. Once that’s up there’s a keyboard available in the companion app. Like I said, it’s wonky but works (and it’s free) until you get a keyboard which is something I need to do, lol.

[@hkoizumi3134]

Ahhh the message book. I wrote "I ate all your food" once in random open house.

[@RayinAlwaysAngry]

I did the same thing but I said I your fridge is very empty o.o

[@Gee-xb7rt]

they are so underused, not that i run around writing in them, so i'm just as guilty as everyone else

[@Rezzmari]

@@Gee-xb7rt I've been looking at homes for housing ideas and I usually give a like or comment in their msg book if I like the look of their house. I've received a few tells from owners who thanked me for the kind words. I always smile when this happens. ^^

[@aprilgodvivi6776]

Everyone making friends while my lonely ass doing quest by myself while watching others play lol.

[@expiredmilk7324]

What's your character's name and what server are you from? I'll be your friend😊

[@DarkKing504]

ME

[@CykaBlyatAlex]

Near the end of Heavensward and have not made a single friend lmao

[@PlazDreamweaver]

Same... D:

[@PlazDreamweaver]

@@CykaBlyatAlex Middle of ShB and haven't made a single friend.

[@loranpayne840]

Your point about “Just message someone if you like their glam or their mount!” Totally works! I absolutely love when someone comes up to me, either in town, or in content, and compliments my glam! We really all do spend so much time on glam that it’s nice to be appreciated 😂

[@hannahboo4343]

I have a lot of trouble making new friends especially on games, because I feel no one wants to be my friend lol. But your advice has definitely set me on the right track so thank you

[@Moonsofie]

Same here T-T

[@jibber-jab]

I think lots of people feel that way Zepla's advice is sound but something I have found is don't expect too much too soon, once you chat perhaps even briefly keep an eye for that character again and send another tell another time small conversations lead to longer ones and that creates a connection that can lead to a friendship.

[@midnight2600]

FFxiv has the single most friendly and amazing comminuty. Just go to a populated area like Limsa square or Gridania and yell that you are looking for ppl to play with and ppl will pm you pretty quickly. If not setup somethin in the party finder sayin your lookin to make some friends. Nobody will make fun of you or be rude about it. 99% of ppl in this game are soo nice and will jump right in with u

[@oukn6293]

I dont in most mmos but for some odd reason I do on ff14 .

[@rakand323]

Same . Sad life

[@ishirutaekakura308]

I've never been good at making friends, I'm fairly shy even if I don't seem it, but I feel like this helped me a lot :)

[@pedrohicken3884]

I absolutely suck at Glamour. My White Mage looks like a love child from Thancred and Galdalf!

[@lordmetallium9678]

Because you using a FREAKING POTATO XD

[@Sasavicz]

I have a little OCD and my glamor are complete matching sets.

[@pedrohicken3884]

Sasavicz so much of this!!

[@austinmartin612]

There are glam communities on every server, might thanks a while to track them down sometimes, but they're there. Also there are websites where you can look at glam collections and get ideas.

[@zeehero7280]

Gancred!

[@cerbgerm]

The hardest part is generating any type of friendship out of thin air. Old school games like wow and ffxi had content that literally forced you to not only group with people outside of a queue (because they didnt exist) but to also build your reputation on the server which would get you invited back. Ffxiv has the same problem modern wow does where 95% of the content is done from a random queue window and there is never any need to get to know anyone so people just dont unless they go out of there way to do it. With that said, ffxivs community is a great one for those that want to get more involved but ffxiv really can be very lonely unless you really put yourself out there. I would be willing to bet there are quite a few lonely people out there in the game and play it mostly solo outside of queues and there is nothing wrong with playing this way if that's your preference because it really does take work to foster and manage relationships with other players and some people just dont have the time or energy to do it. I also think that is a big reason that most of the content outside of ultimate and raid tiers when they first come out are not too hard to pug. Square understands that gaming has shifted and the playerbase has gotten older and the majority of us have many adult responsibilties that dont allow 8 hours per day when we were younger and didnt have shit to do. Anyway, awesome content and I think you have done a really great job here with your videos, sorry for the wall of text.

[@EfiXtra]

I'm a bit "older" and still have no shit to do xD ... but that will change at somepoint won't it :l

[@BigGamingBossMan]

Well the whole point is to play the game, complete the story, explore the world and activities and beef up your character. Multiplayer just happens to be the main mechanic for that. That doesn’t mean it’s built to make friends

[@Shmandalf]

Tbh my problem is that I'm really bad at the game... So no one wants to do stuff with me. Now I just stand alone in town hoping anyone might say hi, but it doesn't happen anymore...

[@Softshelldiety]

I started playing just so I could do story missions because i heard it was fun, and it is, and while I haven’t made any friends or played in a couple months I will say I’ll go back. The story missions that involve parties terrify me and I hate working in groups bc I’m afraid of disappointing ppl and doing bad. That being said every single time I’ve been in a dungeon I have had the most helpful understanding people who have been so kind even when I mess up. Ffxiv has a great player base, even to someone like me who uses a controller and has an impossibly hard time sending messages.

[@coffeelink943]

SoftShellDiety me too. Whenever I do a dungeon run I get nervous, the first role I started was scholar so my anxiety gets build up because everyone is going to rely on me to keep them alive if I’m running a blind hit dungeon

[@justsage3204]

If you didn't know already you can plug any standard USB keyboard to your PS4 and it'll work just like a cpu.

[@Softshelldiety]

King Sage thanks for the advice! my friend have me a keyboard to play with and it seems like it’d be much easier. Once I get back into playing I’ll use it for sure. I had to stop for financial reasons but I hope to play again soon!

[@justsage3204]

@@Softshelldiety haha ☺️ you're welcome anything I can do to help, and I understand me as well. I also had to stop for sometime because of financial issues but I can't wait to step back into it. Spread the knowledge!

[@mikoto7693]

Oh wow really? My standard introduction is. "Hi on PS4 controller I talk slow." I've gotten smn to lvl 50 and whm to lvl 40 and so far everyone has been understanding and chill. But borrowing the mouse and keyboard from my PC might indeed solve communication and some finicky targeting problems.

[@OMGBennyyy]

At first, I was like “another meme video, here we go”. But it’s actually a wholesome as fuck video. I have quite a good friendship group, but my god I could’ve done with this video when I first started up!

[@RannVR]

Yeah I know, right?! Who the hell dislikes stuff like this? I'm convinced at this point that there are people who just click Dislike on every single video they watch no matter what :P

[@KelSunstar]

Just want to point out how hilarious it is to explain something as "wholesome as fuck" ...🤣 I love it💚

[@tommypurdy8160]

THANK YOU for speaking on mental health and compassion! It could be the most important thing someone hears.

[@TheHipsterSnek]

I was playing Ultima Weapon (Hard) and we kept getting wiped. I typed into the chat and encouraged everyone to hang in there, and we referenced the Wiki and planned together as a team. We died several more times but I refused to let it break me. We finally won in our last attempt with 30 seconds left on the duty clock. An awful lot of friend invites were sent around to each other when we were done there. Another thing is to do long dungeons like House of the Dead, and casually shoot the breeze between floors. As a Vierra main, I make endless bunny puns (bunpuns) and it typically gets a positive response. Made several friends by just telling cheesy jokes.

[@Tailionis]

Time to quit and find another duty group. Yikes

[@sectanza]

A couple of days ago, I was out in Limsa waiting on my dad (we play the game together) to finish crafting some WHM gear for me. While I was waiting, a fellow Viera player ran up to me, gave me a HQ cherry blossom corsage, bowed, and ran off. I thanked them in a tell and they responded "yw." It was so sweet; honestly, it's almost like they could telepathically read my "I wish Viera could wear actual hats" struggle, lol. Eased me up a bit towards interacting with other players, but I'll still be sticking with emoting.

[@appleseed4672]

I've also had people randomly give me gifts, food or minions but I think that's because I'm a sprout :p

[@Senty]

If you're a fan or curious about role-playing, checking out the rp servers (Balmung, Mateus) can be a fantastic way to make new friends! People love to help out with the lore and character building process, and getting to enrich your immersion with other roleplayers is a really unique form of bonding!

[@Kottery]

You mean stalking the Elezen population of my server and grovelling at their feet isn't how you're supposed to make friends?

[@Gee-xb7rt]

@Azure Neko i throw gold at lalafell because i know how shallow and materialistic little that beast tribe is.

[@WorldOfNemo]

Won't complain bout ppl groveling at my feet...

[@espeonix.4992]

Even the males lol

[@whatareyoudoingyouidiot342]

I'm not gonna stop you.

[@texanjoecoffeehouse8141]

"Talk to strangers and go into their houses..." My the internet has really adapted stranger danger philosophy lol Keep it up Zepla! Love love love all your content here and Twitch! Don't ever stop being your awesome self!

[@sacredwatermage3086]

Lmao xD

[@DraconSteel]

If you ever visit goblin, stop by my inn in ward 18 plot 8 of shirogane :)

[@lorddarkheart1716]

Just like Pokemon 😂

[@YuubiTimberwolf]

I just walk around in my half-naked rendeer glamour and get whispers like "why?" "Whats these underwear?" "Thats one awesome outfit!" "Is this allowed?" "You need to be banned for puplic nudity xD" And more, instant ice breaker and friend request magnet.

[@DnVFMVs]

Scarred for life cus yall Limsa strippers. Thanks

[@Solidus_25]

I like your style

[@TheOnboardAphid]

I can't decide if that's genius or incredibly creepy.

[@Sugar-bz5np]

@@DnVFMVs are you Irish shaman

[@AlexanderPR2]

Are you a lala?

[@chaplainsenpai1359]

>thinking about how to meet people in ff14 >KZbin recommends video Hol up..

[@Red-fg9qr]

i was thinking i haven't played ffxiv in a while (about a year now) and then this vid appeared out of the blue... scarry shit google can read minds now D:

[@deinemudda7351]

@@hysteriamv touhou project, her name is Marisa Kirisame

[@FrankTulloch]

Its hearts like yours I find playing ffxiv that has kept me online much much MUCH longer than I ever thought I would, reluctantly trying out my first mmo

[@DocMcCray]

Come up to me in game. Tell me I'm pretty. TELL ME I'M PRETTY, DAMNIT!!!!!!

[@sneakytrip6594]

Dyeeamn, girl... or guy. Or both. You lookin' GOOD.

[@elijahpaz9173]

Very aggressive...but I like someone who knows what they want.

[@artorigus19]

Walk into a random persons house, "Hi can we be friends?" :3

[@dr.objection7515]

If someone did that to me I would have been like, "Oh hell yeah sure" lol

[@Sasavicz]

Don't eat my super cool event food! it took forever to get that stuff!!

[@pyroromancer]

A friend of mine is a big superstition person. Their favorite number is 8. They went to Ward 8, on lot 8, on 08/08/2018 at 8pm pdt. and they walked in on an RP group rp'ing a miquote and elzen male stripclub.

[@Pertsantube]

Don't do this irl. Or idk

[@sneakytrip6594]

I do this IRL, now I have a BUNCH of friends in my local corrections facility. Thanks, internet guy!

[@trxe420]

This is good advice, thanks for sharing it. I was struck though as how blurred the lines have become between our virtual lives and our real lives. Its kind of come full circle in some ways. It used to be we participated in online communities to escape reality and now sometimes we need to go back to reality to escape online communities. The glam bit was truthy and funny, so was the house. Imagine in RL if one of the best ways to meet people was to leave your house unlocked and let the world come in to see how wonderful you can decorate.

[@ticktacktoodles]

im a new player who played 3-days straight, & at only lvl42 i was asked by a rando to help them in their black mage quest in the area. Being a black mage myself who went through the same mission just the day before, i was so game to help cuz I knew how hard it was alone. We might not have added each other after, but it was nice helping out and them reaching out about it. I wouldve offered future help but I was afraid to since I'm also new in the game. Still, nice experience. Even in dungeons, everyone is nice especially when I ask questions. Thanks ff14 community & to other new players like me, I think there really isn't too much to fear asking the community in-game, a lot of nice folks.

[@shanegrimes9497]

That was a really beautiful gesture on your part to take time to address the mental health side of things and potential pitfalls in letting MMO and online communities dictate your self worth. Such a wonderful message!

[@Stevoreno_Elcamino]

Lovely, insightful and well worded video. Learned something new about the housing thing too even lol. Only been playing since around May last year and have had so many more positive experiences than in any other online game I’ve played prior, they’ve immensely dwarfed what little negative interactions I’ve had in the game, it’s been amazing to see.

[@TCsStupidity]

10/10! As someone who works in mental health I agree with just being there for someone. You don’t have to fix it you just have to offer your ear. You wouldn’t realize how far this goes.

[@turkashi]

me: going into stranger house and start talking to them stranger: get out my house, I'm calling the police. Your advice doesn't work in real life :'(

[@kurochio5073]

turkashi did you try going with no shirt and pants?

[@turkashi]

Is Men's Red Summer Set with a Golden Uma Kabuto a valid awnser?

[@NesliKWasTaken]

Try to get a cool mount and maybe a nice looking sword and try again! I'm sure they'll come around

[@duskshadow25]

If you put yourself on the receiving end, of course they are going to tell you to get out of their house because they don't know you and that's just creepy. If you think about it, if I come to your house and take your food and sleep on your bed IRL, and we have never met before, how would that make you feel? You probably call the police because you would be like "wtf are you doing in my house? Who the hell are you? Hello?" The key here is you knowing when to draw a line that gives them space and don't feel threaten or creep out by a stranger. If you ask them for help with a quest or some kind, that's way more approachable than just you going up to a random person and start talking about random things like you know them. Not only does that make you a creep and desperate, but also it would make them think you need mental help from a therapist. Relationship happens all naturally. You need time to develop an understanding and a trust in between for the other person to feel like you are their friend. You can't force it if it's not there. If someone can't be there for you all the time, just understand and respect that because people have their own life to live, and you have yours too. It's not just 24/7 FFXIV and nothing else. And if your life happens to be 24/7 FFXIV, then that's very unhealthy and you should find a balance for other hobbies and career driven things. That's how life works.

[@carthius]

most of my friends i developed through Gold Saucer. As well as teaching them things they didnt know about chocobos... Chocobos are my favoritest thing ever in the game

[@RyJMilner]

My favourite part was the "leave toxic people" part, you earned my subscription with that alone

[@rares4894]

what I have noticed honestly, everyone has their own circle of friends and doesn't want to expand. People are generally friendly in the game however that doesn't mean they want to be your friend.

[@cheeto5765]

Facts

[@LimitedSource21]

@@cheeto5765 True

[@xTwilightWolvesx]

A random level 80 (I’m level 51 going through patch 2.2 content) just walked up to me while I was queueing for a dungeon and doing some side quests. We went through said dungeon together, he friended me, and he gave me this awesome mount. What a great guy! 😁 Also, there was this one time when I joined up a dungeon and found that we were all a bunch of Lalafells. It was pretty funny.

[@kinamiya1]

lalafel party trult the most menacing thing you could ever find

[@JGComments]

Me after lockdown: let’s see if this advice works IRL too… Edit: I was joking, but it was all actually great advice! Say hi, be friendly, offer genuine compliments, cut out negative/abusive people, don’t expect too much, and take care of yourself/be on good behavior. Kudos!

[@euclid239]

I low-key needed this i've felt my mental health dropping recently and i don't have many friends irl, so thank you for this video!

[@cloudbloom]

Started playing about a month ago, first time mmo player and I made sure to look up a bunch of beginner guides before playing so I didn't let down the party during dungeons (playing as tank and absolutely loving it). I was physically nervous and shaky when starting the first three or 4 dungeons I played because I felt pressure by playing with other people who probably know what they are doing far better than I do, but I've had nothing but friendly and awesome experiences with other players. They have been so helpful, I set a chat macro to use at the beginning of dungeons letting ppl know that I'm a noob but improving, and I welcome all advice. People have been so nice and have given great pointers, don't be afraid to use chat if you're new and communicate with your team!

[@ACCW42]

The best thing I ever did when I came to Phoenix was make one friend. Then that friend introduced me to more people, who some of which also became friends. And as you meet more people, the friends you have will increase. "A journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step." Find your courage, breathe deep and take that first step. Also watch FFXIV on twitch. You can meet people who already have a common interest and may be on your data center.

[@arachineatzeer7478]

Are you still on Phoenix? I'll try and help yea if you need it :D

[@ACCW42]

I'm good, thanks. It's been a year almost since I came here and have made friends. It just started small and grew from there.

[@arachineatzeer7478]

^w^' I'm am on and I see you I'll throw you a friend request anyway

[@zakisslackin995]

I made a immaculate ex party called, "stupid sexy sin eater" gets friend requests

[@gouki99]

I made my character looks like Minfilia in the past and recently got her outfit from MogStation. from that day I got a lot of awesome friends who like Minfilia and some are cosplaying other characters like Y'shtola and Thancred. One of them became a very close friend of mine and we do a lot of things together since we met and helping each other with stuff.

[@spacetaco048]

How I made one of my first friends in this game was: I told them, while having a light pink dress, dark red cooking mitts, socks and sandals, tan khakis, and a forest green gladiator looking helmet "hey, no mean to brag but my armor is cooler than yours huh?" while they had the coolest lvl 80 armor ever. They said "yeah" and we started talking and they added me :D

[@NabaNouki]

I loved how you choose to illustrate the be bold part with a moment when you lali-ho some dude and he lali-ho back ! It's not just a dwarf thing and IT'S GREAT. During Stormblood one day I send a PM to a lovely roelady to express how I thought their character was gorgeous. We talked a little while in english before we realized we were both French ! Then they talked about me to their friends and one thing leaded to another, I fought Lakshmi EXT thanks to them and spent a few months regulary playing with them. So, sometimes, a few nice words is enough.

[@MDChrest90]

Subbed! I just started the game and am trying desperately to meet people. The timing of this video was perfect, thank you :)

[@KamenRiderRaiden]

_sees this video randomly pop into my recommended_ ....... *KZbin, are you trying to tell me something?*

[@drbettyschueler3235]

Thank you, Zepla, for making these helpful videos. I'm new to the game but a long-time gamer. I am really enjoying the game and hope to make some new friends once I understand the mechanics of the game a little better. Btw, I'm a retired mental-health therapist and you shared very good advice about how to make and keep friends.

[@makopowered5236]

I've yet to make a friend on xiv sadly, unfortunately my feelings in game are indeed isolated and alone.

[@TheChickenx18]

I have the same feeling, 400hrs in the games too. The MSQ keeps me going but im on the lvl 78 quests and I dont know what to look forward to. I guess (making) friends are the real end-game

[@joelacasse001]

What platform do you have? I'm Joseph#0730 on discord

[@varia2354]

@It's Alright Out of all the possible things you could've said, you chose this? It costs zero whatever currency you have to not call someone stuck up, so why did you say it?

[@Lily80278]

@It's Alright some of us have anxiety buddy

[@abcdefghijklmn8935]

Houra I was in their position, I tell you, it’s not as simple as “just be confident!”

[@soli6026]

Thank you so much for this video, I’m not good with people and tend to not trust them, but this gives me hope that I will one day find a good friend.

[@smayuwushka]

good online friends are so beautiful ♡ i really wish i had some in ffxiv

[@deaddragoonliesdreaming5609]

I met my best friend the first time I ran Gubal HM when it came out. We spent the entire run making puns. A pungeon, if you will.

[@zeterzero4356]

I would!

[@DeepbloodFang]

Get help, your friend too.

[@xSkullMusicx]

Been playing for almost 2 months, still haven’t rly met anyone yet. Trying to make friends has rly been on my mind lately, but I’m very shy and I notice ppl on my home world don’t rly talk.

[@sneakytrip6594]

Same. The issue is also that the game doesn't really make it necessary to make friends. The content is simple and easily done on the DF without having to say a word. Only real reason to try to meet people is to raid.

[@FinalShadow17]

What world are you in?

[@Selcryn]

Yeah, what world/data center are you both on?

[@jaymeaaron]

If you're on the primal data center then look me up on famfrit. Jade Croix

[@xSkullMusicx]

DarcPSN I’m on Primal; Hyperion. Edit: I probably should’ve put my name, my name is lalabu labu if u wanna add me

[@OlivierHman]

I have a hard time making friends in FF14. I've played MMOs for over a decade and it's the very first time this thing is happening. I wish there was a regional/global chat instead of the very clique oriented linkshell system. Something like the Novice Network, but for everyone. It would help the lone players to feel maybe, I don't know... less alone and even encourage them to connect with others. I'd love to see Yoshida and his team work on global community tools instead of more private stuff like the most recent ( and useless?) fellowships.

[@matteagle9780]

So whats the shout chat then?

[@MichaelRodriguez-jn2ro]

Shout chat only works in the particular instance/area you are in. For example if you shout near the Limsa Aetheryte, everyone in the Limsa Lower Decks will get your message but will not be recieved by those in the Limsa Upper Decks, the inn/Maelstrom barracks, or the airship landing.

[@MichaelRodriguez-jn2ro]

Yes, It would be nice if there was something like Novice Network but the only way to stay in there is to be a mentor, or never advance your character's story to the ShB content. I am a bit guilty of forgetting about trying out the fellowship thing, but I can't help but to think that discord fulfills that purpose but as an external solution rather than in game.

[@matteagle9780]

@@MichaelRodriguez-jn2ro Yes i know but wat is the alternative. A "global chat for all players? If you can switch it on and off like novice ok. But we all know what a dumpster fire it often is. Now imagine this with all players.

[@Ravenshard1378]

So I realize this video is about a year old, so i am late to the game here. Just wanted to say thank you for your insight and kind advice about not making this game, or any game, the sole reason for existence. Hope you are doing well!

[@DragonianDeity]

I found a # of my friends in 3 ways; similar glams (I say “hi, nice glam, we chat, usually end up friends), compliment people on THEIR glams, or when I play songs through Bard performance. Ideas that may help.

[@tigerlily7760]

Thank you for your words about self improvement, you shared a lot of practical advice and it got me thinking. Thank you also for the reminder to keep working on yourself. It seems super simple but the way you talked about this stuff helped. This was a really important video and has helped nudged me in the right direction to heal from past mistakes, I appreciate it. :)

[@cuatrocinco2186]

People are fighting many, many battles that we know nothing about. "Even though you've been raised as an Eorzean being, you are not one of them. They can be a great people, WOL, they wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason, above all, their capacity for good, I have sent them you... my only child.

[@jacobdauksha4356]

As someone who's just kinda had a lot of issues regarding FFXIV, and slowly stopped playing it because of said issues, this was a lot of help. I'm very much an introverted person and crowded situations kinda make my anxiety rise up, so I tend to have a hard time making friends. I might try and get back around to XIV, even if most of my close friends don't play the game. Thank you, Zepla. You're way more helpful than you may think you are, and I just want you to know these videos are maybe some of my favorites (aside from your videos on this game's butts).

[@shadowgarra360]

Id like to add For console players invest in a keyboard either a regular one or the controller attachment. Idk about Xbox (who will soon join us) But the app on the phone for playstation is also useful but its not always the best. (Slight delay when you start chatting and will disconnect if your phone auto locks when idle but otherwise its pretty good) This is more so to make communication smoother.

[@awesomeswifter1138]

Honestly I just play mouse and keyboard on console because I'm not a fan of console mmo controls but my pc cant handle ff14

[@namehere3026]

I don't think I'll be on xbox. Microsoft wanted to charge players a monthly fee by using their network in order to play online, and FFXIV didn't agree with that

[@FinalShadow17]

@@namehere3026 theyve already stated itll come to xbox one. No release date was confirmed. You can look it up. They announced it in nov I think.

[@FinalShadow17]

@@awesomeswifter1138 honestly, the controller is really well designed for the game. If it wasnt for easier use of macros and chatting, I'd still use controller

[@awesomeswifter1138]

@@FinalShadow17 as someone who's played lots of PC mmos like elsword, guildwars 2, and lots of other bizarre free to play korean games I'd probably agree but mouse and keyboard are what I will always use for mmos

[@Derdaida]

Thanks Zepla, your Videos are always so wholesome to watch. I really wish you the best! As for the Video itself: I think many points you made are also quite important to have in your real life. Never forget to be nice to others, and you see that they are also nice to you! And never feel alone, because there are so many people around you that care for you, even if you don't notice it at first! I've met so many people with anxiety and worse issues since i started playing FF14 an year ago, and tried to be there for everyone of them. I myself went through a dark time and was about to end it all near the end of 2018. Gladly i didn't do something i can't undone and got my wakeup call. Since then i'll try to spread the word so others don't do the same mistake i did. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for this video, really!

[@hiroki_rinn]

“Talk to strangers and go into their houses...” Me: ( ಠ_ಠ) where are the Doritos?!

[@snipabeast2027]

thank you for this its a really sweet message and u seem like a very genuine and kind person i just subbed to u on twitch so i look forward to watching your streams here's to future friends and memories ! X3

[@Karplunk]

for me I just walks around Limsa and /dote and stares at half naked men. Tons of friend requests Edit for clarification: I’m a half naked cat boi

[@jaymeaaron]

Kinky. Me too

[@MCWilson]

Zepla with the straight dope. A video like this was probably difficult to put together, but it’s important and I’m grateful to you for doing it.

[@unknownfate1985]

im happy for everyone able to make friends in XIV, i really am. I never made friends in XIV or in real. Even with advices like here or for real interactions. Nothing worked and in the end I just gave up after 30 years of trying. Professional help didnt work either , so yeah happy early retirement with no memories of happiness for me yay.

[@expiredmilk7324]

I'll be your friend! What server are you on and what's your character's name?

[@sosukeaizen4554]

Shoot me your server name, we should play sometime!

[@UndercoverNoodle]

Shit it's been 2 years but I just started playing. Anybody here still playing and want a new friend?

[@snowman_outdoors]

Very well put together and thoughtful video!!! You are very well spoken and the things you cover apply both in and out of the game. I am very impressed and wish videos like this would be more commonplace.

[@tyquanfortune9400]

It's so lonely in this game none of my friends play and I'm a mmo rookie

[@zenpai7411]

If your still playing let know. I'm down to help o/ I'm a veteran player recently back in :D

[@UNKNWN96]

Another option is streaming/content creation. I started streaming this game a few years ago for a bit and made a lot of friends that I still chat with on Discord. Twitch is a really good way for you to show off your personality to people and they get to see who you are as a person and kinda hang out while you play games and chat. This is a really good video given social anxiety can even follow us into the virtual world of FF XIV, but I believe that there are so many awesome people out there that it's worth putting in the effort to try and make a friend. Great video :D

[@KingKuroTV]

I just started FFXIV, and it honestly not hard to meet a bunch of really great people! I was so overwhelmed but everyone on Brynhildr on Crystal has been so nice and hospitable and patient with me. Great game and great people that play it

[@kamenriderDemon]

godspeed to you fellow bryn player!

[@jeremyleonard3381]

I'm on bryn

[@KingKuroTV]

Maybe I'll see you guys out there c:

[@lordmetallium9678]

Dude you have not seen the darkside of the community : 3 i know I HAVE

[@kamenriderDemon]

@@lordmetallium9678 oof u right...

[@SauceyNoodle]

>be me >want friends >find socializing to be boring even irl >play msq alone until level 80 icrie

[@KnnlztMewie]

Saucey Noodle samee. This is literally me so far

[@SauceyNoodle]

Kayan plus I’m on diabolos and there’s not many social people on that server lol

[@emmarodo9328]

fairly new to ffxiv, I saw someone wearing the new tank top glam and messaged them about how cool it looks and where to get it, now we are married in game and I met so many people with them, I known for a fact that I would not still be playing the game if I didn't have the confidence to send that message be bold people

[@DaveMothaFkinStrider]

its true shes my adorable waifu now an i am incredibly lucky and happy to have met her

[@SailorMoon1812]

I would normally counsel trying to fix things with a group before just leaving. Communication is very important and can solve many issues before they escalate to a point where someone feels they have to leave. Be ready to listen and accept that you may have done something to upset someone unintentionally as well as being ready to speak and share the difficulties that you are facing. Friendship is a two way street regardless of whether it is in game or online. On the other side is a person controlling their character, just as you control yours. Consider them and be kind, always.

[@akula77772]

3 months: not a single friend. 😂 and I finished Shadowbringers already, the trust system is a blessing for me and I don’t have to ask people for shit anymore. I just watch and follow. I wish I had that earlier in the game. Also people (mainly FCs) tend to treat this game more like job than a game. I’m trying to have fun and rage at the game and reentering dungeon’s trials n shit till I know it by heart. Not have someone yell at me for not doing flawless runs on the first go.

[@MikuMiku017]

If you have a problem irl and you don't have a person to talk about it You can ask to FFXIV player, there are a lot players that really kind... I remember when i was had a problem irl, idk what to do back then, so depressed. So i play FFXIV, sit on bench near Gridania's aetheryte and afk someone 'tell' me "Hi... i noticed you always sit here", and i replied "oh haha..." "Something happened to you?", "not really /smile" "well you can tell me if you have problem, or anything you want discuss to me about here or irl", "well actually... (tell all the problems)" we are finally became friend

[@CenKyne]

I've played ffxiv for years and it's essentially the quiet psudeo solo game. Everyone buzzes around and nobody has ever spoke. Duty finder sticks you with folks and nobody talks and the duty gets done. In wow nobody ever shuts up!

[@IfFaCT0r95]

Awesome advice! I’ve also gotten to know people through PoTD & HoH party finder. Generally you’re stuck in a party with the person, talking through mechanics so that is a good way to start conversation. If you enjoy their company, but can’t get much farther due to time constraints, plan to continue later. Create/add them to a cross world linkshell so you can make future plans 😊

[@MoonbeamBlack]

As I'm listening to this I had to stop and commend you for addressing that feeling and /or action of alienation by others. Specifically your approach, as you articulated from multiple perspectives and sound logic, so I feel you really related to a broad myriad (or spectrum) of people. You are the epitome of how cool ffxiv online peeps are. I've been playing a year and a half and still consider myself a newb. Peeps like you making peeps like us feel welcome is the shiznit girl. Rock on!

[@GrandJass]

Honestly some of the best advice I’ve ever heard. Inside and out of the group. Thank you.

[@TheQwuilleran]

- talk to strangers - go into their houses things that wouldn't fly irl XD

[@verdantis9960]

What a great video. Also, I really appreciate you including the importance of self reflection, kindness and getting out of a toxic group of people in your life. I didn't know much about the housing, so I'm definitely going to keep an eye out for open houses.

[@nawafalqahtani604]

thank you for tips, the main issue in my cause is language barrier :3, but I hope soon it will solve ^_^

[@Kine11328]

If you're in Elemental try transferring(or just visit to see what it's like) to Tonberry. Has most English speakers in all Japanese Data Center.

[@kezia2435]

This is my first video of yours, and I found it very helpful. Thank you for making this video!

[@boi3987]

World has changed so much, back in 2004 WoW people automatically socialized, made friends with ease. It was a much tighter community than the MMO community we have now. Now MMOs feel like single player games with MMO elements. The genre doesn't seem like it's same to me as it was.

[@cerbgerm]

It's a solo game with a chat feature that has other players in it. The only thing you dont have to queue for is high end raids which let's face it, the majority of the community either stopped doing or isnt interested in doing. Might depend on data center but it seems far less people are doing eden than did coil and alex. So do your solo queue stuff, chat occasionally, glamour it up, and just relax and try to not take this game too seriously because se stopped taking it super seriously a long time ago. I'm not saying they stopped caring, but almost everything they done has eased the difficulty not made it harder as they only create hard content for the 3-5% that actually clear it.

[@MrPetschko]

fun part is that you find friends more easy in other genres these days.

[@homunculi0408]

The community of FFXIV is one of the most accepting and helpful gaming communities I've ever seen and interacted with. I don't know how FF does it but when you play an FF MMO, you'll feel like its home.

[@OrcFriedRice]

Watched this video and just literally made a friend with a rando in final fantasy 10/10 stars.

[@plumtucker9514]

was diagnosed with BPD(borderline personality disorder) last month. it explains so much about why i cant retain friendships. I used to have to tell people that i have a very "cat-like" attitude, it was just my social disorders and in introvertedness getting burnt out from trying to keep face with the amount of friends i thought i had to have. Thank you for the advice.

[@BlazeLibra]

I am now beginning to realize and regret the countless times I have not tried to make friends with players when the opportunities clearly presented themselves. Most recently when a new player sat and watched me go through the flashy Summoner rotation, who later left and I didn't do shite, don't make these mistakes people

[@jaymeaaron]

Awww...I just get random people wanting to touch my cat boy.

[@linares528]

Your voice is very soothing :)... Even when I work I just enjoy hearing you talk about my favorite game. I don't need to look at the screen just to enjoy your content. Very good tips by the way ☺