How To Validate Your Emotions

How To Validate Your Emotions - Candace van Dell

Рет қаралды 51,155

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 141

@bryanh194 5 жыл бұрын

When you mentioned not getting validation from parents and then searching externally it resonated with me to the point of tears. Thank you for sharing, you're work is truly helping me learn and grow.

@xw6475 4 жыл бұрын

Me too. My parents were never there when i was a child hence my codependency issue

@notavailable708 3 жыл бұрын

@@xw6475 how do you heal then

@masonanders3354 3 жыл бұрын

i dont mean to be so off topic but does any of you know a tool to get back into an Instagram account? I was stupid lost my password. I would appreciate any tricks you can offer me.

@jamiecee4960 Жыл бұрын

I'm Enough and good and Loveable. We give so much to others. My Dad left when I was 6 years ago. So maybe that's where I'm stuck sometimes. I feel fear. I do deserve to feel what I feel.

@kar3n35 4 жыл бұрын

Since i have noone to talk to about my issues i use youtube to learn and validate my self and also commenting anonymously on comment section helps me express my self and i dont need to tell anybody about it.

@keithmccaslyn2527 4 жыл бұрын

Check out Sandra rays book the forgiveness diet,its from the 80's still spot on though. Louise l Hay's book "YOU can heal your life" and Dr.Phyllis Light's book "Love now here,how" amazing clearing techniques that work. Lighthealing.com all the best www.goodreads.com/book/show/1059821.Loving_Relationships www.goodreads.com/book/show/129603.You_Can_Heal_Your_Life?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=DyqTVMLlC7&rank=1 & www.amazon.com/Love-Now-Heres-How-Relationships/dp/0964893541 www.subliminal-shop.com/product/emotional-pain-relief-healing-aid-4-0/ www.subliminal-shop.com/product/directional-reflection-shield-575g/ www.subliminal-shop.com/product/overcoming-fear-575g/ also essiac tea remedies.net the personal rejuvenizer's from Lighthealing.com Intrasound vibratory uplifting healing powder/gel. profound.intrasound.org

@chewygal69 5 жыл бұрын

I have tears in my eyes. You have struck a chord in me.

@lesliegoings4964 4 жыл бұрын

Hi Michelle, I just watched this video for the first time, and I see that you watched it 10 months ago! I just found out about Candace. Do you follow her regularly?

@lailarose999 4 жыл бұрын

aww,, I hope ur okay

@Gloroxsocks 3 жыл бұрын

*virtual hug*

@alyd7783 5 жыл бұрын

I’ve never related more to a video in my life. I’m very surprised. Just saw this pop up and I want her to be my therapist now. No other therapist has made me feel how I’ve felt watching this.

@TheMmiguelito 3 жыл бұрын

There are nooooo coincidences in life!! This was EXACTLY what I needed,& the EXACT TIME I needed to hear it!! Thank youuu Candace, for sharing your gift with us!! Becoming #empoweredempath!!💞💞🙏🏾🙏🏾

@casssolari9012 4 жыл бұрын

Candace...stoooooppp...you’re making me cry...For me it’s people I meet in the psych hospital where we’re not really meant to maintain relationships with patients out of hospital.

@tookeys3932 4 жыл бұрын

I found you to be overly attractive, (My fault) so I placed my phone down and just listened to you.. And between me thinking bloody hell she has a attractive voice too, again (My fault) I heard you! :) Thank you kindly for sharing your knowledge and your inner beauty, your devotion to helping others.

@emilycharlotte1940 5 жыл бұрын

I love this girl ❤️ she’s beautiful inside and out ✨

@LisaSmith-yb2uz 3 жыл бұрын

Completely agree! ☺️👌❣️

@MrDaveFerrier 5 жыл бұрын

YES Candace!!! Your awesome, reparenting the inner child is the stage Im at after letting out alot of pain from some original wounds, redefining the message is important and Im only starting to get how to do this.. youve helped me get some clarity on all of this here. Thanks so much :)

@tydtarot 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you divine soul for helping the humanity with your valuable videos. These videos have helped me a lot. I don’t have money to enroll in your courses but these free videos are helping me a lot in my shadow work, just wanted to say thank you from bottom of my ❤️ 🙏📖❤️ lots of love and gratitude 🙏 🙏🙏🙏🤗🤗

@julieclarke3818 5 жыл бұрын

This is a helpful video. Thank you! I have always struggled to accept the fact that my parents won't accept me for who I am.. I'm turning 24 soon and still am struggling with this. so I'm trying to learn that I am enough and that I am loved and appreciated. No matter what they tell me.

@npdnews3749 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much! I am just now learning to validate myself and accept that all that I have is all that I need.

@keithmccaslyn2527 4 жыл бұрын

@justsomedude6455 5 жыл бұрын

You often mention the collective consciousness, and how a video idea "comes" to you. I've never believed you more. This is EXACTLY the video I've been needing and waiting for on my healing journey. Thank you so much 🙏🏼

@Eridanus0001 4 жыл бұрын

Brilliant video. "I didn't get what I needed but it wasn't because I didn't deserve it" is a brilliant summation and it can be true of many things.

@sheraineayo6674 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for your videos. It’s made me realize a lot of things about myself that I never knew.

@CandacevanDell Жыл бұрын

Amazing!!! Absolutely love this!!!

@passerby234robin2 5 жыл бұрын

thank you, my mom has let the past make her bitter and is stuck. She won't receive my love. so I have to love her from a distance.

@kikib.4519 5 жыл бұрын

Yeah I had to do the same to my mother.

@CandacevanDell 5 жыл бұрын

Robin Wall I understand!! Sometimes it’s for the best.

@x0xpamx0x 5 жыл бұрын

Ohh my, I’m here bc of my mother, too!

@redwhiteblue9866 4 жыл бұрын

Yep, I had to break free from the covert narcissist in my life, my sanity literally depended upon it. I have that "love from a distance" dynamic going on, anything else is far too toxic.

@yvaz3373 3 жыл бұрын

I have found that awareness is not enough...being aware if your patterns is the fir step but by no means the healing. When you become aware of your patterns you are left with the knowledge of why but you still need to know how to break it emotionally and that is not easy. Even though i act differently, away of these patterns as much as I can, I still have the feelings. The feeling of rejection, the feeling of not being enough...they are still there and I don’t know how to overcome that. They keep coming back, no matter how aware I am.

@cupcinka 3 жыл бұрын

I feel the same. I meditate to set free this emotions so it helps me. But if I miss a day of meditation or I stop validating how I feel, it comes back..

@yvaz3373 3 жыл бұрын

@@cupcinka however, awareness does help to process everything with more calm. When I didn’t know why I felt in that way, I also felt powerless, out of control. Now that is gone....something!

@abdulc5726 2 жыл бұрын

Wow. You've blown my mind. Ive been working on myself for a while now and I know some of the messages in this video but no-one has explained it so concise with a helpful process. Thank u from my heart. X

@kate7932 4 жыл бұрын

One of the best videos with that one of EFT about self abandonment.. 😊 really nice

@CrystalRMartin 5 жыл бұрын

😭😭😭 This is so spot on today it left me bawling. I totally see it. Thank you. 😘

@keithmccaslyn2527 4 жыл бұрын

@heleneclemenza8290 5 жыл бұрын

Love someone who is unavailable... my trademark

@AmysBeachFitness 2 жыл бұрын

Hi Candace, Over the last three years I have been on my emotional intelligence journey, I received some gifts from you just by listening…. Thank you!❤️

@marilynmartinez6651 3 жыл бұрын

Very new to your videos....just started.....been listening for many hours and omg ..so much to listen and learn. Realizing so much to learn...when the student is ready..the teacher appears. Grateful to have discovered you. Ty so much..appreciate. Love your realness

@juliiahu 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you Candace, so much wisdom and warmth : )

@emilianolopez4289 5 жыл бұрын

You're really beautiful and super intelligent Candance, a kindred authentic spirit. This video is key for my healing, thank you! The problem lies not only in the family of origin. Parents belonged to a competitive society based on scarcity, consumerism, fear, and survival of the fittest long before we were born. Those values were passed onto us. There were toxic values of capitalism at work. The excessively demanding competitive lifestyle of capitalistic societies where civilians are forced to compete with each other in the job market for basic survival is what's at the root of the psychological predisposition of parents to think of themselves as not being good enough for the fear of survival inherent to a fear-based economy. In other words, no one is left with any other choice but to compete for o fight for his/her life in the marketplace. Since competence and perfection are values ingrained in the expectations of the corporate culture and tied to human survival, the belief of not being good enough is in the head of every single human being. And thus parents perceived that perfection is a must-have value to teach their children for the purpose of survival. So the true evil is actually behind the values of the monetary system imposed by force onto the whole of the population. The parents conditioning based on perfectionism, caused by the potential perceived threat to their survival, is then passed onto their children and they end up believing that if they try harder all the time, they will be loved. But the children's fear is to not feel loved and the parent's fear is that if the children are no good enough, they won't survive this world. Amazingly, the result is not what the parents intended for their children, for they end up feeling not good enough and that feeling sabotages their self-esteem which in turn sabotages their professional success in adulthood. So, the core issue or the original cause is to be found in the lack of care for human feelings the soulless monetary system has. In fact, one of the basic requisites for the monetary system to remain alive is the need for cyclical consumption, which can also be translated into: "it's never enough, I need more", "I need to be better if I'm to survive its high demands". This monster always needs more. It has no soul. Thus it is able to psychologically corrupt the minds and hearts of any civilian, parent or not, to think accordingly to its "laws", mechanisms and toxic values. People don't want to take this seriously: the monetary system has a mind of its own and it does not share power nor care for the feelings of people. You are describing the toxic dynamics between parents and their children, but the original root cause goes actually far deeper than the family circle. This is a public health issue and thus not limited to affective relationships. And it should be addressed as such, holistically. The problem is that if there is a social preference towards a certain degree of excellence regarding certain job (elitism) or the skills the market demands for a certain job, the mind that beliefs its Self to be good enough will logically experience a cognitive dissonance between what is wanted by potential employers and the level of proficiency perceived by the job seeker.

@keithmccaslyn2527 4 жыл бұрын

@highbirdlx 4 жыл бұрын

This hit me really hard. Thanks so much for the video!

@kardoyle 2 жыл бұрын

Wow Candace ! Totally convinced God works in mysterious ways☺️ and your video popped up right at a point where I had to really step back listen to you and give myself a friggin break‼️ I am so ridiculously hard on myself✨ I just finally severed a 22 year long relationship last Wednesday🌹🌹🌹 it’s only been a week and I’m already thinking I’m supposed to be all joyful 😅I’m not joyful🥹 I am grieving this friendship/relationship very very deeply because I’ve leaned on it as a crutch almost like an alcoholic has with alcohol so I need to give myself a friggen break. T h a n k y o u and I appreciate your video because it really helped me in the moment and made me feel lighter💕💕💕💕 I just want to feel lighter not so Debbie downer😬

@pleasesmileformeasmr5925 4 жыл бұрын

I don't even feel good enough to feel like I am spoken to in the video. I feel like I am overdramatic and I didn't have thiiiisssss much problems in my past or my partner isn't invalidating...I feel like it's even invalid and hurtful to those people to think that way. And at this point I don't even know if the person really did something wrong or if I was just a bit too sensitive, because I convince myself that I am guilty and that it wasn't meant to be hurtful and that I am the problem so I act like everything is okay and as the person did nothing wrong... 'till the point I convinced myself so much, that I'm not even sure what to feel / what is real anymore so I also can't talk about my feeling bc I don't know if they are a coping mechanism or my real feelings.

@keithmccaslyn2527 4 жыл бұрын

@industryliaison 5 жыл бұрын

The statement you said is so powerful to me “I didn’t get what I deserved but now I do” awesome stuff great for my journaling.

@azteck218 5 жыл бұрын

Wow... Amazing. I got SO much from this. I really needed this in a big way! I think I need to bookmark this and re-watch a few times. Thank you very much Candace. Love always and forever...

@keithmccaslyn2527 4 жыл бұрын

@912musiclover 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for your videos. They are so informative and so easy to follow. Your way of explaining things is so clear. God Bless you✝️

@healthychick9450 Жыл бұрын

Straight bars!!!

@Songswithgrace 5 жыл бұрын

*love your words, beauty, and soothing voice, thank you*

@portiaclark4748 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you Candace. What you are sharing is very powerful.❤️🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

@bobhunley8794 5 жыл бұрын

You are wonderful. Bob

@johndonaldson6920 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you always good advice your very intelligent 💫💚🐍

@dr.florence 5 жыл бұрын

hi, thanks for your videos, they have really helped me understand my husband who a HSP. Everyone is talking about how awful the world is to HSPs, but nobody how much they terrorize the people they are with by trying to induce feelings of guilt rather than to acknowledge their own involvement in not managing their emotions and taking it out on others. Could you please make a video for partners of HSPs? Or for HSPs who do not want to acknowledge how they are? Or for HSPs on how to better deal with non-HSP partners?

@courtneymccullough1264 4 жыл бұрын

I love you Candace

@kar3n35 4 жыл бұрын

Before when i was lost and confused god and jesus realy help me go the right direction and fallowing gods will and standards gave me validation about my self and overcoming my flaws and improving my self gave me self esteem.

@ahmedlachine390 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you, your channel has helped me alot.

@CandacevanDell 5 жыл бұрын

Ahmed Lashen I’m so glad 💫

@iamchannelll 3 жыл бұрын

Faced one of my fears yesterday camping alone

@DubWNation 4 жыл бұрын

Thank you

@Hosamo7 4 жыл бұрын

is it a coincidence that this video was released on my birthday? and I am in deep need of self-validation!!

@valeriejoyce3215 5 жыл бұрын

Thank You 🌿💐🌿

@nadiacavallini4728 5 жыл бұрын

You’re brilliant! Thank you for an amazing video as usual.

@sunflowerkidworld 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this video Candace! So many clicks from watching it

@Julie-hi5fy 5 жыл бұрын

I recently had an awakening. I have a narrastic mother and had an alcholic father . I was the scapegoat and when my father was murdered a couple years ago my whole family used me again as the scapegoat for the pain they were going through which made me wake up to the reality of my childhood and for my own attachment woinds. I sae me becoming my mother with my children and it made me wake up more to why I was in so much pain and taking it out on my children. I really love your videos. I have been obsessed with figuring it all out and becoming emotionally strong. Thanks for your videos and would you be available for maybe a monthly session?

@jamiecee4960 Жыл бұрын

We drain our own Emotions.

@notavailable708 4 жыл бұрын

1:10 💓 5:55 7:00

@annyspb1 5 жыл бұрын

This is amazing - exactly right for me. I'm slowly working through your videos and having to spend time playing them over and over, very gradually working through my fear and brain fog. Just one miniscule thing (probably!) - what does 'corkiness' or 'corky' mean?

@MaryPaulCo 5 жыл бұрын

Amazing message!

@jawedu 4 жыл бұрын

On point!!!!

@AncientSouthwest 5 жыл бұрын

Very helpful. Thank you. I appreciate you.

@digifarmer5348 4 жыл бұрын

beautiful like an elf, her inner beauty BOOM!!! wow

@mariabonitastudio81 5 жыл бұрын

❣️ great video... thanks

@vanessamccoy7890 3 жыл бұрын

Candace, what if you can’t actually recall any moment of your original wound?

@LA-lr3bp 5 жыл бұрын

Amazing, thank you!

@danielr.larson1625 5 жыл бұрын

6:25 that is real, and that is what I feel. so, now we're gonna reveal............

@nastja3294 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you so so much!! ❤️

@g.pearson4726 5 жыл бұрын

Wow Thank you

@alexgreen1913 4 жыл бұрын

I know I was never enough for my dad. He always made feel uncomfortable:(

@jigho5078 4 жыл бұрын

You were enough. He just didn’t know better.

@melvinchildofgod6148 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you 😊 . 😭

@willmooney6096 5 жыл бұрын

glad its gettign to the fun part i arbitralily linked a cool story to refer to

@willmooney6096 5 жыл бұрын

i had the muzzle on me literally like a big distraction

@iamchannelll 3 жыл бұрын

So what happens if personally for example, I am unable to fill my emotions, but I can understand that I’m quite frozen also, due to a lot of trauma and paralysing fear

@ehannigan0405 5 жыл бұрын

Can’t stop crying

@bryanh194 5 жыл бұрын

In the same boat! How beautiful it is to be able to express our emotions and grow

@courtneymccullough1264 5 жыл бұрын

This was huge for me!! Thank you wonderful Candace xx

@courtneymccullough1264 5 жыл бұрын

feels like all my fragmentation can come back together :) thank you for sharing this. so appreciate it!

@lotus1695 5 жыл бұрын

Wow.. Absolutely amazing!! 🌈 Thank you ❤️

@theesotericgenius8631 5 жыл бұрын

Amazing work. I needed this tonight, to allow me to sleep. What about other people's emotions and how to stop seeing the pain and sorrow of others? Can you make any videos about how to stop starseeds from committing suicide. There are probably lots trying. I seen a guy the other day being talked to by police who was about to jump off a bridge. People are becoming homeless etc. because they are tired of material and don't know any other way to live, other than what the machine has taught them.

@larrytyler8601 3 жыл бұрын

My Father use to take me fishing! I always had to swim back! My mother would take me to sell school candy on the freeway at 5 o'clock traffic. My older brother would help the school bully when he beat me up! I love Jesus!

@willmooney6096 4 жыл бұрын

Tajts amazing news

@willmooney6096 4 жыл бұрын

Feels u wxpand in nu ways

@eeeo2196 5 жыл бұрын

just because i’m a guy who’ve had a horrible childhood including sexual abuse multiple times n all kinds of abuse.. I’m in a point where i see myself danger on those who i think n consider normal.. therefore i keep myself away from them also because i get attached easily.. it’s frustrating n weak to feel that the least kindness u get became too much to handle cuz you’re not used to that. so to not to be negative on ppl and put myself in a situation where i get attached or become insecurely vulnerable .. i set too many boundaries with ppl only cuz it’s less hurtful for everyone

@paromita_ghosh 2 жыл бұрын

So wht do i nedd ro do firs is yeah my mom and all not saying SL is bkwass yeah

@allisonhuben3990 4 жыл бұрын

You have so much peace. Can i ask your religion??

@moramejia88 5 жыл бұрын

Can a codependent person be narcissistic too? Both that first show codependency and them detach like nothing?

@nicolegollan9581 4 жыл бұрын

❤️

@dseer13 5 жыл бұрын

do i need to reveal what i feel so I can heal or can it heal if i keep it concealed? serious question.

@megaweb1 5 жыл бұрын

In my experience is it fine to keep it concealed, as long as you are honest with yourself and fully aware of what you feel.

@Melissa-mg9pg 2 жыл бұрын

Fear of failing the people Iove

@kategreene5692 4 жыл бұрын

I love u

@Melissa-mg9pg 2 жыл бұрын

I have fear of loss losing the people people I love

@kikib.4519 5 жыл бұрын

Hi Candace

@CandacevanDell 5 жыл бұрын

kiki B. Hi💫

@anthonydied8697 2 жыл бұрын

I need help. I'm getting all jammed up and distracted by everyone. They are weighing down on me. To much no one will leave me alone

@notthat14u2no 5 жыл бұрын

So I have co dependency issues... I know what the reason is... But what is going on with me when I have a good man but I still don't feel he's good enough? Or he's boring when its me thats the problem? I find a way to end it before it even begins... Being consciously aware that its ME that's the problem not them. I guess feeling vulnerable is my why I do what I do. I don't have a lot of opportunity to practice this in real life... Auto pilot takes over and then I take back over sooner and sooner.. Becoming conscious of what I'm doing before I do it is becoming easier... Hopefully I can keep doing it and not give up before the miracle happens.....

@FollowingJesus23 5 жыл бұрын

Really really helpful thank you sister appreciated 💗

@Pasta_684 Жыл бұрын

The Secret bye Rhonda Byrne The Law of Attraction It really works

@AraguaciCarlosdeAndrade 5 жыл бұрын

❤️🙏

@CandacevanDell 5 жыл бұрын

Araguaci Carlos de Andrade ✨🙏🏻

@michellecoronado4608 5 жыл бұрын

I wish you had a team so we could really get help Please it is your next God given

@CandacevanDell 5 жыл бұрын

Michelle Coronado what do you mean “a team”?

@michellecoronado4608 5 жыл бұрын

Like assistance People who have learned a lot from you To reach more 💗💖

@lidiawroblewska1184 5 жыл бұрын

❤️❤️❤️

@x0xpamx0x 5 жыл бұрын

My mother is so bitter bc of her past. She will not receive my love. It truly hurts! 😢

@hydra7616 5 жыл бұрын

I am a parent of an adult child who from a young age separated herself from me and her dad. You talk about the child not getting what they need..in her case she didn't allow it. She was a difficult child in that if she didn't get her way or what she wanted she would have temper tantrums. As a teen and now adult she gravitated toward bad men and drugs. What do parents do when they have difficult children who resent you because of the times you had to say no? They block you out and go into lead dysfunctional lives.