So, she likes CONFIDENT guys huh?

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#confidence #games

[@AC-um2mk]

It is gaslighting. It is partner abuse. Don't tolerate it even a little bit.

[@markaurelius61]

Yes, that was the word I kept thinking of. And the funny thing is that feminists use it more to accuse men or the patriarchy of doing it to women.

[@AC-um2mk]

@@markaurelius61 Yes, society as a whole generally gives women a free pass to do this to men. If a man does it to a woman though ....

[@QUguy]

Guys, when you’re dating she tells you, “You’re laidback. Hard worker. Confident. Easy to please.” When you’re married she tells you became “Uninspiring. A Workaholic. Cocky. Without a purpose” And yet, you haven’t changed one bit. Hmmm.

[@augustlion5105]

Why my relationships didn't work out: I wanted peace, she wanted drama I wanted quiet, she wanted excitement I wanted to invest my money, she wanted to spend on vacations and momentary pleasures I wanted to make her feel good, she ONLY wanted me to make her feel good with no reciprocation I wanted to work overtime at my job, she wanted to take sick days just to play around I wanted to watch documentaries, she wanted reality TV I wanted to talk about philosophy, she wanted astrology I only wanted her, she wanted the world At least I'm 100% compatible with myself 😁

[@pantherman8719]

I like your name and pic.

[@A_View_From_The_Shire]

The eternal battle between chaos and order

[@drivventodrumm1]

Same. I’ve never had anything in common with any woman. Fortunately channels like this have helped me recognize when I’m being manipulated

[@Claus1234]

@AugustLion "I only wanted her, she wanted the world" This line is so powerfull and beautyfull - Love it´ ❤

[@melenico4512]

Well she sounds like choas and drama the default factory setting.

[@vladdimor]

In Russia we have this poem which goes something like this: "I am a woman, which means I am an actress. I have a hundred faces and a thousand of roles."

[@Ted1775]

I heard that in Russia there is a proverb, "When a woman is silent, do not interrupt her."

[@davidyardley512]

Many many women are addicted to drama.

[@megamanamillion2]

Yeah, it really is true. All they want to watch is Young and the Restless, Brokeback Mountain and so on. Like, can we watch something besides dramas?

[@ExAnimoPortugal]

I'm done with women. I would date and go out, sure, but I'm not chasing. I don't hate women and I don't avoid them, but I no longer invest in them.

[@Ted1775]

"Yes, a uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence. I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women uh... women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Mandrake. But I do deny them my essence." -- General Jack D. Ripper. Dr. Strangelove (1964)

[@XAzraelX1]

Same, I'm open to something casual, but I won't chase them. She would have to fall from the sky into my lap at this point for me to even be remotely interested, I've become very indifferent.

[@Dav-S5658]

What you are describing is narcissistic personality disorder, and possibly borderline personality disorder, both of which have always been constituents of female psychology. What we are experiencing now is that these traits have grown beyond manageable irritations, to cancerous tumors. The cancer has become so widespread due to feminism and social media.

[@EE12CSVT]

Correct. It's become a PD on a societal scale. I see it everywhere and why I rarely engage with people.

[@vkrgfan]

To be completely honest I have never felt the real sense of community in the West. I felt the fakeness of plastic smiles right after I stepped out of the plane when I first arrived to the U.S. Western society itself breeds narcissism, because of the values they have created. They don’t prioritize common good, they prioritize competition even when it comes to basic human needs such as shelter, healthcare and education. I think Western Capitalism has reached the point of diminishing returns. Chinese beat the West at their own game, now they are emerging as number one economy in the world and the West is declining.

[@redrustyhill2]

@@vkrgfan 🤣 except china's economy is failing fast because its also just one big ponzi scheme founded on loes and deception.

[@MarvoloRiddle]

It's not due to feminism or modernity. It's pretty much always been this way. Folks are just now catching on. What's frightening to me is that pretty much every other woman my age I interact with is like this. I wonder what percentage in total are.

[@redrustyhill2]

@@MarvoloRiddle im sure its always been there. Alot of what modern psychology calls a "disorder" is just bad behavior that was never corrected as a child. Zero accountability for their actions and inability to control their emotions.

[@davidp2888]

Intentional gaslighting is their specialty. Up means down, left means right. I've had women tell me exactly what they want from me in a relationship, I thought her expectations were reasonable so I agreed to provide them. She also said she agreed with what I wanted/needed. Within months things started going sideways, and when I said I wanted to talk about them I was met with resistance, stalling and obfuscation. It's like nailing jelly to a wall. No matter how hard you try to make it work, it always ends up a mess that (she says) you made and you're responsible to fix/clean up.

[@MikeSmith-ls3fn]

This discussion has resonated with me in a really momentous way. I'm 54. A widower for the past five years and single father to a truly wonderful teenage girl. Was a mess for a few years after my late wife's passing. Got my stuff together, got back in shape, and realized who and what I am. I became confident, and was "ready" to see what was out there. She initially seemed like a real catch. Then the "tests" started. Then over-reactions to trivial things. Then came gas lighting (I had never experienced that. It's horrible!). I've pretty much decided I'm done. Personality issues (I.E. "Crazy) can be concealed for a while, but then it eventually comes out. I have fewer days ahead than behind. I don't want to waste a second of my remaining time with someone that will eventually rip off their mask and yell "Aha!".

[@DavidCartmellDJCartmell]

Sounds like you dated a narcisist.

[@sbentley1140]

A very good female family member once told me ( women are never happy unless they are miserable) she was right. My ex was never happy with her job, her friends, her family, with me. 😳 I realised no one could make her happy. So glad to be rid of her, I'm going full monk mode. I just want peace and quiet.

[@Boris-iz6wd]

That is why I laugh when I hear guys say partner. "Good Grief" is all I think when I hear it. Men forget that she knows who she is, she knows what looks back at her when she looks in the mirror and she knows that destruction is all that will come from any "relationship" she fakes. She wants to come out the other end as clean as she can so she pretends. You never get to see her open up to you or relate to you, you just get the ploy she puts to you to get out of you what she wants and needs before she moves on. Then she can tell herself how bad you were. I would say if you insist on interaction, that you not get mad about it or even sad just realize what you are dealing with. The only mistake men make is listening to anything they say or taking them seriously. Want a successful relationship with a woman? Take them as seriously as a clown at a circus. The make up and dress up should have tipped you off that all they are is entertainment best forgotten once the show is over.

[@SteveOnTheEastCoast]

Nihilistic (black pill) take. But spot on.

[@garlandtx10]

It's simpler than that. They don't see men as people they see us as tools or accessories. Good for season while we appease them but individual valuable? Nah shes the only one she sees if value.

[@melenico4512]

Technically clowns wear makeup as well.

[@bgrego88]

@@SteveOnTheEastCoast he's not wrong... What woman in your life has been important to that degree? Integral to your success? Your mother? She was dropped off as soon as you started taking care of yourself... If you have a girl that is that important I'd love to hear it

[@bgrego88]

@@garlandtx10 if we are tools and wallets then they are sex dolls, chefs, maids, and baby factories. Works both ways

[@martintremblay4248]

You describe my life when I was married. Hostage, trying to keep the peace with erratic behaviours I would have not tolerated otherwise. Getting married and living together is giving away all your bargaining power. Don't do it. You can have good relationship with the crazies - because they have to behave or you show them the door. Simple.

[@steveinskeep4964]

Playing stupid games... wins stupid prizes.

[@palaceofwisdom9448]

The confidence that matters is your confidence that you will be fine without her. If she sees that you cannot help but want to deal with her, then you have already lost.

[@TDog0412]

Perfectly said

[@johnmahaffey9578]

You've described my ex-wife's behavior to a T. No clear communication, undermining me all the time, yet complaining and playing the victim. It was endlessly frustrating. I have much more peace pursuing my own path and focusing on being a good dad.

[@silverfox2358]

I'd rather have no friends than fake ones.

[@lorderectus1849]

Agreed! Beware the fake mask 😷

[@Jakkaribik1]

Fake Ones Hurt You way more and that Permanently

[@TokyoTraveller]

Men and women have two different definitions of what love is: Men: Love is a feeling, demonstrated by what we do for the object of our affections. Women: Love is a feeling, induced by the sacrifices of the poor sap that sees her as the object of his affection. Many people, including myself, have noted that women love more like cats do. But now that I've gotten to know cats, I have concluded that women love FAR less than cats.

[@bigguy2683]

Cats are very honest and seldom vary from their nature. You can know a cat's limits and boundaries and they will not change.

[@jasonBGI]

As a cat owner I concur. Plus cats don't use makeup

[@PrinceRevolver]

My ex poked holes in my confidence in order to get me stay. She was full of insecurities and I stayed way longer than I should have.

[@IluvpringlesOG]

My mother and I were talking after my divorce and I told her how she told me that I stopped chasing her. She (who was married almost 50 years) laughed and asked “when do you ever catch her?”

[@Profitglutton90]

The undermining is all a test. And any man who fails the test will gain ever increasing levels of hate from her until she starts going from testing to trying to destroy him.

[@Torgo1969]

I had to yell at my elderly mother a few weeks ago when I visited her and my dad. She was nagging at him and telling him what to do as he was cooking the onions and pierogi and he kept telling her to back off and she would not. She clearly did not trust him and his judgment regarding his cooking. This sort of thing happened all the time when I was a child and it was clear to me that they were miserable together and I always feared that a family breakup was coming soon. I had to tell her to stop belittling him like she was doing and I angrily told her that she has no idea what it does to a man to be constantly disrespected like that, and that sort of thing was what made me despise both of them and not speak to them for years at a time in previous decades. Looking back, I should have told her that such belittling and disrespectful treatment is perhaps why she would always cry and ask him "Why don't you talk to me?" when she insisted on grilling him and condemning him for being distant, in the house when me and my siblings were home.

[@QUguy]

Kurwa, that sounds too familiar.

[@AsAugustSleeps]

It’s not surprising that women behave this way when men are portrayed as bumbling idiots in almost every piece of media.

[@jesuslikesmetal]

The age old "you give an inch, she'll take a mile" is something I've always come across in my relationships.

[@BoltUpright190]

We men simply want peace and some degree of predictability in our lives, whereas women thrive on chaos. To have one, you have to relinquish the other.

[@mathias1dk]

It's actually the opposite. Men thrive in chaos (sports, war, competition), women thrive in safety. But in order to continue to feel safe with a man, she will throw chaos at him to see how he responds.

[@dirtyparkranger1398]

A womans reaction to confidence is profound. Not arrogance. But that confidence that I know who I am, my faults, my short comings, and yet I know I am the best me I can be. And you can't change me; morph me into what she wants, or think that it's what she wants. Want me for me, or don't. I will not change because I have worked already to be my best version. I will change when I think it's necessary, not to morph into the beta you think you want. It was always completely wrong and I lost, hard. That level of confidence, gained through life and love experience, is a level of confidence they can't handle. Then they walk away, only to come back later to realize that the confidence is better than playing the game of undermining confidence, or him trying to please her so she won't run, so he must chase. If she hurt you, she can't come back. They always come back. Find yourself men, and be that man. Know your faults. Fix the faults or just love them, live within them. Always great content huMan.

[@bigcheech1937]

They can’t help it…Just accept it and move accordingly 👍🏾

[@Luke_wait_for_it_marengo]

it's almost depressing how applicable this is to so many women out there, equally how frustrating this can be.

[@lordofgingers]

This type of antisocial behavior usually has a trauma at the other end of it that she needs to deal with and address so that she can be in a better psychological state to communicate with and form strong and effective bonds with people. For the men reading who did their best. It's not your fault. Read those words again. It's not your fault.

[@user-sq9dv7ru7v]

The juice is not worth the squeeze. Go your own way. Be secure within yourself.

[@pierreetienneschneider6731]

You can't squeeze juice out of a stone.

[@michaelhampner7672]

As someone with many relationships and twenty years marriage... This video sounds very familiar. This vague communication that leads to nowhere, gaslighting and testing now and then was exhausting and lead to nowhere in the end. But can women be blamed? They are the way they are. But it would be nice if society would stop to pretend, that women are these wonderful, wise and perfect creatures.

[@AsAugustSleeps]

None of these issues will change until the modern day female worship ends. Society at it’s very core needs to change.

[@carlauclair8748]

My ex would undermine me by praising the idea of a man in shape, while sabotaging my opportunities to go to the gym. Once I did get in a shape; then came the jealousy of any woman near me.

[@indianastan]

My confidence has never been better since I don't play the game anymore. Stay away from these creatures guys. And if you need to still play. Remember you are the prize 🏆

[@bgrego88]

They want to play games and expect you not to

[@bobbybero7452]

Happened to me a lot even with girls I barely knew. There were a few occasions where a girl I had just met would tell me I’m ugly just so it would be easier for her to hook up with me at a party later that night while everyone was drunk. When these girls would make advances on me I would usually say something along the lines of “Didn’t you say I was ugly earlier?” She would reply “I didn’t mean it. You can’t take what I say seriously and you can’t hold it against me now that I want to hook up with you” or something similar to that. How is anyone supposed to build a relationship on that stupidity?

[@mobilemcsmarty1466]

it's because you were talking to a s** toy. fun in the moment, only sad how the batteries run down soon 😐

[@victorfinngall3911]

Any communication that exists in the realm of plausible deniability I treat as if it doesn't exist.

[@bgrego88]

Agreed, Her: well I said... But I meant (felt).... Me: So you ain't said nothing then

[@thefadedhero9824]

You summed up all my relationships perfectly. Women bleed your confidence to fuel their own, drain your happiness to restore theirs when they've had a bad day. Emotional vampires using you to fill their needs. And then they're shocked when you can't emotionally support two people anymore.

[@deyahdn3]

Exactly. Vampires must have emerged from this kind of behavior. I realized this the other day, thinking about my ex's actions.

[@kruzkontrol3394]

Older husbands know this bullshit well. But there is a way to put a stop to it. Next time she threatens to leave, open the door for her. And Mean It. This may take a few times, but she will get it.

[@Mikexception]

I opened the door and got out. After earlier divorce. Because I was realizing social limitations to my freedom. Live in exclusively my own flat with no obligations working on my own personal interests . Now she ask in secret our doughter "where did I make mistke"? And I ask myself how come I became so lucky man?

[@logicaltoafault6310]

The games don't make me unsure of myself, they make me unsure of being with that woman.

[@huMANs_channel]

Yep, i agree... we all must think this clearly.

[@chrisandrews8819]

I've been told that the drama, mind games & nagging are shit tests. If we can figure out how to be aloof, hold frame & turn the tables, the shit test is passed and the attraction will be stronger than ever. At least that's what I've been told. I've yet to pass these tests for very long though. Eventually I get fed up with the hassle and just stop caring. Life is enough of a challenge without having to play 4D chess to sustain a relationship.

[@nickcoldest7128]

👏🏅so many games, so little time…

[@EE12CSVT]

A woman has been testing me for around two years. I expect she'll try again in the next few days. Each time I turn it around on her to demonstrate that I'm far above it, yet she'll try again sometime after. I try to ignore, but she'll crawl out to do it again and again.

[@MB-ss1nq]

She wants constant reassurance that you're an authentic man who can harness feminime chaos so she may submit... and not a boy she has to dominate amd mother.

[@NorthernBell4612]

Why do they erode the self confidence of the other? I would be wondering and questioning the stability of the person and the relationship. Could it be: *Cruel manipulation and twisted sense of enjoyment seeing the other scramble. *Their lack of maturity, communication skills and emotional intelligence to address the issue(s) fairly and logically. *Deflection of their own lack of self-confidence by degrading the other. *Is there an honest valid reason to cause frequent second guessing outside of one being ignorant of a better way or the other party continues doing questionable things. Bottom line: There should be a will, want and desire for the best of and from each individual and for the pair. If that’s not the target of both, communicated and acted on there’s likely no positive outcome.

[@bradabar2012]

The shit tests never end... that's why I don't play the game.

[@lorderectus1849]

Don’t waste your time playing a game that’s rigged before you start!

[@PlanetOfTheApes999]

The important question is why so many women behave this way. I think it's usually because they're insecure, and constantly testing men with these sick mind games is their attempt to a.) feel assured they're with a man who is resilient and able to read their minds, and b.) constantly create drama so they can make the relationship all about them. However, no matter how many hoops men jump through, they can never satisfy these women, because you can't fix narcissistic wrecks. All you can do is walk away.

[@baronc.7107]

Absolutely. The second I spot a speck of narcissism, I completely ghost without a trace. That goes for anyone and everyone with zero shame. I treat narcissism like invading barbarians. Drop everything and run! Protecting my peace is the most important thing in life.

[@PlanetOfTheApes999]

@@baronc.7107 Good on you. I had to learn this lesson the hard way. A couple of sociopathic women I dated destroyed my life. I didn't realize they were sociopaths until it was far too late. I'm in therapy, struggling to deal with the wreckage they left behind.

[@pyroxxx]

@@PlanetOfTheApes999 Better late then never bro, I hope you learned. Wishing you a quick recovery.

[@PlanetOfTheApes999]

@@pyroxxx Thanks. I hope so too. :)

[@Tuloisboss]

how can this be like 100% correct description of what is happening in my life atm. guess we guys are going through the same scenarios over and over again...

[@sarcastabunny]

Holy. Mother. Of. Everything unholy ...This is the best description of the last years of my marriage. Trying to hold on to something that was, clearly, failing and coming apart at the edges more and more. When she finally 'decided' that she fell out of love with me ... it was still hard to accept but, I had been so confounded and confused by that stage, it was a relief? It's only now, with time and lots of space, I can see how badly I had been bamboozled and beaten. Rebuilding is hard but, worth the effort.

[@TheGreatOldOak]

Don't date narcissist. Be direct, if she can't accept that then leave her and meet someone new. If she abuses you then leave her and meet someone new.

[@seanscon]

Problem is, they also try to redefine narcissism as confidence. An actually confident man who trusts his decision- yet is open about shortcomings of his decision and is not hiding the risks - Aman who is worried about the potential mistakes despite his best effort - will dry them up like the Sahara.

[@M-S_4321]

Narcissism is part of the Cluster B personality disorders (along with Borderline, Antisocial and Histrionic)

[@M-S_4321]

Narcissistic (the dramatic/erratic) Personality Disorder

[@Mr._Anderpson]

I've frequently joked that I love mathematics because it is the opposite of dealing with a woman. If your inputs are correct & you apply the correct formula, the outcomes are consistent & reliable. With a woman, consistent inputs aren't appreciated & the correct formula depends on her mood & interpretation of the input as compared to her desired outcome.

[@gregbenwell6173]

I always applied Newton's Third Law of Motion to human dynamics, as it "For every action there is an opposite equal reaction!" Though I do add the logic that "Not every reaction has a positive outcome!" IN FACT often the more disruptive the action, the more chaotic the reaction can become!! Think of it like two planets colliding into each other!! It becomes "messy" quick, debris flying all around, as the two bodies slam together uncontrollable!! It sounds a lot like how some relationships work!!

[@seb_travel]

Small wonder many men prefer gaming than a night out. Do the challenge, slay the dragon/puzzle/all opposition, get a round of positivity from your mates and sh*t-talk onto the next one. As opposed to going out, getting rejected (as a point of order to benefit the woman's ego) and potentially spending coin and effort for no gain at all, except an ego hit at night's end and losing some face in front of your mates. However I've found more success encountering women on their own, when in a posse they are unnecessarily brutal and I find my mates and I preferring our own company and shunning women at the bar due to generally negative events out because of them.

[@garlandtx10]

What I've learned is to chase the man I want to be and not chase a woman. They end flocking to you and chasing you but you focus on chasing whom you want to be.

[@konoko1002k]

I had been living in this gaslighting for years. And while it almost drove me to suicide, now... I just cannot take any of their words seriously. And how can I love a person, who I cannot talk to?

[@pierreetienneschneider6731]

Nothing is worth taking your life. Make a list of all you can keep financially, and throw her away.

[@kaiserpuppydog7174]

Lucy promises Charlie Brown she won't pull the football away when he tries kicking it. He never learns, though.

[@gregbenwell6173]

Just listening to what you said makes a lot of sense to a guy like me, because of what I went through with my second wife!! It was bad enough when she would throw a fit in a store or burger joint, like a three year old child, screaming at me, emasculating me publicly!! She would even go out of her way to humiliate me in those situations loudly pointing out my faults and flaws to ANYBODY in ear shot!! BUT most of the time she would constantly do and say things in private to undermined me and what little authority I had to the point where I actually began to question MY OWN sanity!! I couldn't build a garage for example that was big enough to hold JUST MY CAR, because in her words "That would be selfish", and "I have to take care of her car as well"! And wasn't allow to own anything that she deemed "my personal property" like a motorcycle or an old car!! I wasn't even allowed to have an opinion on anything either, because it was HER idea to get a dog or her choice what color to paint the bathroom, I was never allowed to make decisions on anything!! In the end I always got the blame when it was wrong, or something didn't work!! Ultimately I had ZERO control over ANY aspect in my life!! I was NOT allowed to go anywhere, I was not allowed to have any friends outside of who she vetted, and I was only allowed to do the things SHE wanted me to do, and say the things SHE wanted me to say, and own the things SHE want to own!! I couldn't even buy the tools I needed to repair things and she literally controlled EVERY aspect of my life!! Then one day almost 10 years into our marriage.....................I stopped!! I stopped doing what she asked me to do, I stopped "clearing things with her" to pursue my own interests, and I began doing the things I WANTED to do and the things I enjoyed, without her permission, approval or consent! The crazy thing is she continued to try and "blame me" for a lot of stuff that I was simply NEVER around, to be blamed for!! I had even got to the point where I was buying some of the things I wanted to buy, and stopped putting MY MONEY into her bank account!! Funny how fast she began to change.....but by 5 years later, in the now 14 (almost 15) year long marriage she was to the point where she never had any control over what I did or where I went!!

[@MB-ss1nq]

It's tough. Tiny little daily microsteps. Day after day... until one day you look up and you're miles from where you started. Men... NEVER set aside your masculine frame. Better for her to be upset in the moment when put in her place... rather than to allow her respect for you to evaporate by constant "Yes Mildred" betastisizing over time.

[@gregbenwell6173]

@@MB-ss1nq For me I realized it was better to ask for forgiveness then it was permission, AND if she didn't forgive me, then I understood where I actually STOOD in the relationship!! She wanted somebody to worship her as a "God" and I am sorry, but I don't pray that way!! Another thing I began to realize was, she place ALL responsibility on my shoulders EVEN for things I never did, partook in, or was a party too!! Literally I was her own personal "scapegoat" and no matter WHAT situation came up, and not limited to "her boss at work", her weight problems, or even where she got food from herself.......it was ALL always my fault, my problem, and caused BY ME!! In the end I made a pact with myself that I would NEVER take responsibility for things I personally had ZERO control over and I was never a party too!! And I realized that the last 5 years I was married to her, as it is what drove me to make "a change" and start living my life for me!! I also realized I was wasting my time trying to make somebody happy, who just couldn't appreciate a thing I did for her!! Hell she couldn't even say "Thank you" if I brought her a glass of water....and farm animals had more manners then she did!!

[@AsAugustSleeps]

You can blame their fathers for this kind of behavior. Their fathers treat them like princesses their whole lives and then we wonder why they act like spoiled brats with their husbands.

[@THETRIVIALTHINGS]

It's often not easy to fight off your own nature, especially when you're rewarded and praised for it instead of punished. This is the example of that.

[@xaraxen]

Understanding women's nature is the only set of knowledge I need of them. Among them: Let them boil in their own juice, it brings out their flavor.

[@ancientcarnivore4287]

True. Not long ago, I had a similar experience. A decent woman, yet from the start she kept questioning every my decision. She rarely agreed with me on something. Always had a second opinion. It made me feel on edge, there was never a calm moment, I always felt like "things are not going right" and "I need to settle this somehow". Yet she wanted to be with me. On the third date, I told her she is overcritical and its impossible to be at peace with her. This only made her more upset and she started arguing. At that point I realized I need to end this ASAP, since it will only get worse. If she has this little respect for me in the beginning, the end could be terrible. The worst thing was - SHE DIDNT REALIZE IT. She didnt notice she is constantly attacking me. She was unable to be agreeable.

[@conversionlyft]

She was testing you if she could trust you, it is common, she liked you, women do these unconsciously. however, there needs to be a point of surrender or else indeed you are dealing with dysfunctional ppl with low self esteem and you do not want have to do anything with them. I can understand a play from here and there, but if it becomes too much is toxic and it ain't worth it.

[@ancientcarnivore4287]

@@conversionlyft Good point. I am fine with a woman bringing her own opinions, but in the end, she has to surrender. I am the one making 2-3 times the money she is. I am the one who is bigger, stronger and more fit. I am also older, more experienced and smarter. Most women are a bit like children to me - I look at them from above, physically, mentally and materially. They can play their games, but within my limits. She cant compete with me. She can compete with other women for my attention.

[@tizodd6]

It's what the rp refers to as sh!t-tests. She will "try" you, then expect you to know exactly how to put her in her place. One of my exes told me two things that I'll never forget: 1. After we broke up, she told me she would intentionally start drama/arguments so we could have makeup s3x. 2. She liked to be "put in her place". When we dated, I was still in my honeymoon phase of thinking women were "sugar and spice and everything nice". She taught me so much about their true nature. Suddenly all my other failed relationships before her, made more sense.

[@HorseWaterDrink]

If there is no drama, they create the drama.

[@scottwhittaker3239]

Human, I think women are comfortable at being uncomfortable. Thus the drama and passive behavior.

[@AlwaysPim]

She will communicate with the next guy in line, just not with you. Never date someone who stonewalls you whenever things get tough. Been there, big mistake. Never trying with avoidants again.

[@garlandtx10]

Call them on their lies and when they obfuscate responsibility to you remind her it was her choice that put her there.

[@9279chomp]

Insanity begins upon the pursuit of understanding women. Just be you. If you don't enjoy something, get rid of it.

[@EE12CSVT]

I don't know, I think it's a fun intellectual endeavour to understand them. Doesn't mean I enjoy most of them.

[@puremaledark8305]

Man, i felt this one. They want to be in control while NOT wanting to be in control. The goal post is ever shifting.

[@willferrellssweetnips]

I don't understand how someone can function like that, with such conflicting goals ALL of the time. Sounds damn exhausting

[@puremaledark8305]

@@willferrellssweetnips it really must be exhausting. Id never want to live that life. No wonder they are so angry

[@13RedbloodeD13]

Very debilitating. Extremely frustrating. Right on point. My respect, sir.

[@benyamin7363]

Stop trying to please her. It is IMPOSSIBLE to win this game. Absolutely disregard her opinion and do with her what you want. If she comes along, fine. If not, fine as well as your life should have other things that are more important. You have to set the frame of the interaction and if she does not follow, then leave and withdraw all attention. Think of women as children in adult bodies. You do not reward inappropriate behavior. Wake up

[@stevec3526]

You can only please yourself. I learned years ago making a woman happy was almost impossible. Read Dr. Robert Glover "No More Mr. Nice Guy".

[@Mylife-tn8ig]

Exactly, like I said above be the captain of your own ship if she want to ride she will if not there are others. if she is hot for you she will follow if she is not she wont so just do what you want, This is a lesson I learned the hard way through experience.

[@ZFosterZ]

Damn. You dated Nex I knew too? She did that ridiculous, Subliminal messaging, either to manipulate me into giving her something without her directly asking… so she could say later, I.e. throwing in my face, “I didn’t ask you to do that, did I?!” Or, Subliminal messaging so I was meant to “get it”. “You just don’t care. You don’t listen to me. I have to do everything myself!” Death by a thousand paper cuts. Was utter nonsense. Nearly ten years of that. I can remember I got to the point whereby I stopped making decisions. Everything I did, was wrong, again and again. I stopped thinking for myself and waited for her to say, when and what was ok to do. She eroded me to the point I was formless. Then, she would complain, “I have to do everything myself! You don’t do anything! I have to tell you!” I did what she asked. Still wasn’t good enough, as it wasn’t her who did it. Simple thing like putting a picture frame on a wall…. Left a bit, right a bit, up a bit, down a bit, left a bit etc etc. “You’re just not putting it right!” Id swear, frustrated, anxious and tense and tell her to do it herself. The eye roll, the tut, then she would move it. Was in the exact spot I FIRST put it in, but now it was suddenly ok…..!!?! Maddening. Or another time, I made a meal. One of hers…. She told me before I started, “You have to do it right, timing and ingredients and quantities, you can’t get any of it wrong or change it, otherwise it won’t work, ok?” Boom! Pressure is on! Id consult her the entire way. She would say this or that, good good, pass and pass. Id do it, exactly to the letter, filling in the I’s and crossing the T’s. Serve the meal, on time. “Oh… it’s not right….,” What. The. F**k?!?! I made it exactly how she said, I consulted her the whole way, and still, WRONG! “I should have made it, tastes better when I do… I don’t know why… you must have not did something right… maybe too much, maybe not enough… I’m not sure…it’s ok… I will eat what I can… no I can’t finish that… order a takeaway?” Soul destroying. Really was. Safely say. I won’t ever let a woman do that to me again. Brat-child’s dont understand respect or courtesy, and just use it to get their way. No time for it.

[@hzr9mrg999]

When a vvoman is in a new relationship, she sees herself as a screenplay writer, directing and producing a movie, where she is playing the lead role (the alleged victim) and the man is there to follow that script (the villain). It's HER movie. His wishes and desires are completely irrelevant to the role he is placed in to play. Unfortunately, men are generally simple minded and jump at the chance to fulfill their roles. This narrative works only if all the characters in the movie are benefiting somehow, as they do in traditional relationships. But in today's modern world the only one to benefit from their role in the movie is the vvoman herself.

[@MarcMolk]

Wonderfull. In french we have an expression : "Elle cherche un maître à dominer". Means "She is seeking a master to dominate". Don't let the snake come in.

[@olympusentertainment2638]

You pretty much described VV@m3n.

[@rossjones2525]

There is a lot of wisdom in these old sayings. 🙂

[@davidp2888]

I just read a rant about how "every...single...man" does/thinks/says/wants whatever and how evil we are. The women respondents all cheered. If a man were to do the same thing about women? He'd be lambasted.

[@DavidCartmellDJCartmell]

It's even worse for me especially having Aspergers and reading people. I've had no problems getting the relationships but I swear to God there are some people as much as you love and try to communicate effectively with them to get to the bottom of things I swear I think women expect men to be psychic. The number of those I've dated and walked away from because I end up getting sick to death of stupid games people play it's no wonder men walk away from women and women themselves become bitter and twisted because they can't keep a man because no man in their right mind would put up with such BS.

[@huMANs_channel]

well said.

[@DavidCartmellDJCartmell]

@@huMANs_channel Love your videos keep up the good work. The vast majority of women aren't all bad however, I do find it scary how in recent years especially through dating apps to social media I think it's fuelled women becoming more narcissistic in nature and for modern men dating the modern woman and some of the calibre being bred it's quite scary. I think it's going to get worse for men before it gets any better. I highly recommend you watch the Man Talk on KZbin and his series on why men are walking away from women it's a good laugh.

[@redrustyhill2]

@@DavidCartmellDJCartmell this has been my experience too. No matter how much i tried to comminicate, they refuse to listen, and its because The relationship is about HER and her alone.

[@cosai]

Had the same experience ...undermined my confidence and decision making..i became paralyzed when she moved on. and have to rebuild my sense of self. Tying to communicate openly led to her feelings being hurt and she became distant and resentful..i apologised for saying the truth sooo many times. looking back now i was right maybe 90 % i knew she was cheating but held on..i held on for 2 years trying to work it out after getting confirmation of her affair. peace comes after divorce

[@rogerblakely7453]

I gave up on women and dating about four years ago at the age of 50 years old.

[@johnmahaffey9578]

I'm 49 and reaching that point as well.

[@EE12CSVT]

I'm your age. I gave up 20 years ago when I realised this trash is all there is.

[@HoriaIoan]

For me the thing that worked in confidence probing was to control my temptation to feel useless and ask her what would she do in my place or if she had any ideas. Some women stop and had no words some women didn't even hear me. In both cases reason prevailed and knew who to keep and who to discard. The key is to stop feeling anything (or stop showing) when asking.

[@feralandroid]

This issue is exactly what destroyed my marriage. She wouldn't communicate her desire, and then would get upset when I did the thing that she didn't want. But.. She always blamed me because I was the one who made the decisions. It got bad enough that I started hiring helpers to do things I would normally do, that way she could blame them and not me. After 10 years of this I had enough and just stopped asking her or discussing my decisions with her. She couldn't understand. She eventually left me anyway... My problem is I thought it was cute when we were dating. I was very BP back then.

[@Shingo_707]

You nailed it, those childish mind games are so frustrating to a point that i don't even want to try anymore, if by any luck i run into a spontaneous opportunity, sure i'll shoot my shot, but she'd better behave herself, because i'm out of patience.

[@bigneiltoo]

The guys who already did her and left her were obviously confident around her.

[@donnahannaford6840]

OMG I'm glad Brett and I had the relationship we did as, we built each other up always because marriage doesn't work if your dragging spouse down bcos your one full unit together. I ❤ed my wifetime. If any shelias read my message 1 don't pick on him, don't undermine him, say what u mean even if it's 'FFS teach me how to mow the lawns cause you need a bloody rest"

[@EE12CSVT]

As others have said, can we clone you?

[@andrepostoluck3452]

plausible deniability aka "mistakes were made, but NEVER by me" until the denier herself believes it

[@aninterestinglife.9748]

Had to listen to this one twice. Thanks huMAN.

[@None_of_your_business666]

We lead by not giving a fuck. By understanding that there is a difference between compromise and just bowing down. You dont need to fight, you don't need to be rude... All you need to do is be definitive when standing your ground.

[@kalstonii]

The point of this, I think, is “why should men have to stand their ground with a woman they are supposed to enjoy”? I mean, how fun would dog ownership be if your dog was mean to you but nice to others?

[@asghaa]

One reason women might behave like that is that they don't respect you as a partner, just like a child challenges their parents. Eventually they prove to themselves that they were right, their partner couldn't handle them. The relationship is over once she starts doing that so don't waste more time on her, end it before she does. A woman is suppose to support you no matter what.

[@davetherave4599]

The story of my 30 years of marriage. Human, how did you know? And how come I.. up until this very moment.... didn't. I was in the dark about it. Amazing insight Human. Thanks..

[@BaronCorrino]

In my humble opinion, as a man your meant to just 'get it!' Your initial confidence was/is an attraction factor that illicited a positive response from her at the beginning. Overtime, through the relationship your tested to assure her that you still 'get it!' (That is to say have still got it!') Maybe the Problem is the feedback loop that you describe where over the duration the testing causes a degradation of signal, to the point where you stop wanting to receive the signal and cut the loop.

[@yearight1205]

I'm willing to bet money that the reason for all this goes back to tribal times. Where the men would spend all day with the other men, and the women would be around the other women all day. So the women would be on their best behavior in the short time they'd spend with their men. But around each other they were vicious and would tear each other down, and break other women's confidence so as to ensure they get the best man. But since we no longer live in that system, they are turning it against the men. I don't suspect we were designed to spend time with our mate. I think rather that's just the basis of ensuring paternity that drives us to be around her.

[@KarmaSwiss]

Really good point of view here

[@richardjcranium]

Confidence is based on a series of successes. It's really hard to "just be confident bro" if you fail 99.9% of the time. It's always the guys that are the naturals aka the tall, handsome well-off guys that are the worst. They assume that just because it's easy for them, it's easy for everyone.

[@jaredk6789]

No, confidence is knowing your where your boundaries lie, and having the self respect to enforce those boundaries. If you can't walk away from a situation in 15 seconds your screwed.

[@kurt2022]

I'm getting it from my female friend about being too frugal and NOT living life to the fullest, and all this during a major economic downturn that could quite easily turn into a global depression. This whole work more so we can party more and go visit places we've never seen before is exhausting to me, both mentally and physically. Gotta party while Rome burns, aye? I feel she trying to take an intelligent person that hates consumerism and turn him into a person that is living paycheck to paycheck or a financial moron. Maybe it's time for a replacement but I know they would more than likely be far worse.

[@elonever.2.071]

Consider this. Women are resource hunters...and you are her prey. It is obvious that she doesnt care about you. If she did she would appreciate that you are thinking about your future. She wants access to what you have to offer *her.* Once you open that door of allowing her to tell you how to spend your money you will become one of many of her puppets that she manipulates to get what she wants. Women instinctively know that their beauty and fertility are fleeting in the scheme of things and some (like your friend) are obsessed with getting as much out of it before it is gone and they have to settle.

[@EE12CSVT]

But TBF men are just as bad. I've had it from men that I should be doing as has been suggested to you, but then again he was 60 going on 14. I occasionally like to meet up with like-minded intelligent people my age, who like me are very much aware of the forthcoming economic depression and potential hyperinflation. They want to do something about it. Other than that, I'm frugal, and try to prep. I'm also spending a lot of time in the gym as I can't guarantee such places will survive, and I need to have a good reserve of strength and fitness if things get really nasty and I need brute strength to fight over resources.

[@A_View_From_The_Shire]

I get where you’re coming from, but I agree with what Richard said, I find men are just as bad with money. Most people are financially and economically illiterate.

[@theitalianguyde1864]

The "that's not what I meant!" from the woman. So why doesn't she say what she means!? Also the "yeah but I said that because I was angry and to cause you a reaction", right so we are having a heated argument and she adds fuel to the fire!? If she passes these comments regularly, I can guarantee you she is not good relationship material.

[@redrustyhill2]

Because women dont use words to convey meaning, to discuss ideas, to investigate truth. Words to them are just a weapon to manipulate others and get what they want.

[@evos469]

Just be a fboy at this point if you're going to deal with modern women.... I mean 10 times baked potatos.

[@audeamus1180]

I find she likes a confident man until she starts hearing the word 'no' too many times. Then it's back to the nearest orbiter pushover.

[@EE12CSVT]

Correct. Enforce a boundary after warning her about it previously, and that's the last you'll hear of her. You're lucky to not get rage, before she goes looking around her orbiter for new supply.

[@mgtowbylogic5592]

Which is just a way to guarantee no actual relationship develops as this guarantees a lose lose scenario. That is her goal. (Which is also why she can’t state her goal, because it would reveal to you that she’s playing a destructive game, you’d leave and she’d have no one to play with.) A- as you describe she destroys/prevents the relationship regardless the quality of the guy Or B- She runs into a guy that’s better than her at the game. Then she can play the victim once it ends and repeat the process with the next guy. I suggest the gents read Games People Play to brush up on how lunatic people set up these destructive games which draw you in and waste your life and destroy your spirit. If you’re looking for a ltr then begin assessing her immediately with hard questions. And lots of listening. Be well gentlemen. ❤

[@cuteraptor42]

Why are you describing so perfectly what happened to me in the last month huMAN? 🤔

[@Mylife-tn8ig]

I like huMan's story it reminds me that failing is not failure. its a learning process. if he never went through this the light bulb wouldn't have come on with him realizing you cant and never will please a woman like this. Be your own ships captain regardless of how she acts. When Thomas Edison said it took him so many hundreds of time to get the light bulb right he was asked didn't you get tired of failing he responded i didn't fail i just learned hundreds of ways it didn't work. The best stories are from people who lived them and share . Thank you HuMAN for sharing your experience.

[@stevesundstrom]

This is unquestionably the best video on all of KZbin. Amazing work huMAN.

[@MarvoloRiddle]

This has got to be one of the best videos I've watched of you in a quite a while. I never gave this topic much though.

[@nicksundby]

Who cares what women pretend to think

[@step4018]

Yes I remember this all too well... You get to the point where you want to video every conversation as you think your memory is going.

[@Profitglutton90]

Professional gaslighting

[@JamesHawkeYouTube]

I've seen younger dudes act like a complete dufus around their woman too. Don't forget to smarten yourselves up too fellas.

[@jrddoubleu514]

Wmn are problems that don't want to be solved. Innate narcissists seeking codependent facilitators.

[@tizodd6]

So true. My most recent ex was facing losing her car ins because she had recently gotten in another accident. When she told me about it, I immediately starting coming up with solutions on ways to get covered again. She got upset with me an I was confused af. She basically just wanted to vent and complain, but didn't seem interested in actually resolving the issue😕

[@jrddoubleu514]

@@tizodd6 When man realizes what they are, it all makes sense. Their narcissism IS, innate.

[@mogadeet6857]

A very tiny percentage of men actually have enough money to make these girls dreams come true. So glad I'm poor.

[@NZuzo-zq3kg]

Women actually don't like us

[@GameplayzOfficial]

They love what we can provide, and it's not necessarily money, but protection, and emotional protection, and once we cannot provide that, "magically" the love wears off...

[@pierreetienneschneider6731]

They offer sex for money.

[@gibbletronic5139]

The only way to deal with it is to nip it in the bud and deal with it before it becomes a problem. If she's still unwilling to be cooperative after you've established clear boundaries, then it's time to walk, gentlemen.

[@THX5000]

Constant S.-testing. Funny how this behavior is so ingrained in their DNA.

[@SFbayArea94121]

Funny how they’re the only ones that are SHIET 😂. And literally only bring the fish 🐟 taco 🌮 into the equation, BUT NOTHING ELSE.

[@SFbayArea94121]

Aside from drama, problems, etc

[@JureJerebic]

Because they're subconsciously testing men for competence. Only if you stay true to yourself and don't "do what she asks" etc., you can pass these shit tests.

[@bigneiltoo]

@@JureJerebic Yes, and you can bet when she REALLY likes you she will use EVERY tool she has ever learned about.

[@Snarge22]

Women create drama and kayos for their own personal entertainment. Call women out on their shit tests and let them know they are replaceable. Put them in their place as they're actually looking for exactly that.