I Documented My Child Maintenance Court Journey | Application | Serving Him | First Appearance

After 13 years, I decided to take my deadbeat baby daddy to court for child maintenance. I document the journey here.
Here’s part 1 of many.
Hope this video gives inspiration to any mommy dealing with a deadbeat.

[@maxtube7207]

You stopped giving him the cookie and the other mommies are giving him cookie, that's why he doesn't want to take care of your child. Thanks again for your content you are helping me a lot.

[@divinelycreated4him]

I’m a divorced mom of 3 and my ex husband gives money for the kid’s when he feels like it🤬 I’m at the point of taking his ass to court too. I just didn’t want the system in my business but these men are disgusting!

[@KamoErny]

Fight girl, i moved from R1.5k, after he told me he is in debt and I felt like i had no fight in me left. Went back 1 year later for an increase, found out he had 3 other kids, tried to use that as an excuse. Mind u his mother lived with one, was behind on that ones school fees, sent his mother zero, and wasnt supporting the rest. Ended up having to downgrade all his fancy debts, eg gym, cellphone contract etc. Im not at R4200. My child is 4. So fight. Demand his bank statements.

[@suzyben9643]

As a wife to a man I met when he already had a son with somebody else, am always the one reminding him to send what he is supposed to send when we go shopping for our babies clothes and all that, we shop for the other one. I can't find myself sitting down so comfortably with a deadbeat dad. Children are innocent and they should be catered for by both parents no matter what. This is so brave of you and one day things will be better. Much love from Kenya 🇰🇪

[@jazzy-hq8er]

Yea you remind him 😆 please make sure he don’t turn around and be a deadbeat to your kids A woman shouldn’t have to remind a man to take care of his kids

[@suzyben9643]

Si ati he doesn't remember but I always questions him If he has already sent. Anyway, I know who I married and he loves loves all his children he can never be a deadbeat.

[@kwazeybear]

WOW!! This is so deep 🥺🥺 and really hits home for me, my daughter is 15, the father has done NOTHING for her in the 15 years of her existence and in all honesty I don’t have the energy to fight him in court or even ask him to take responsibility.

[@Thoughtsbyme-ts4jz]

I hope you find the strength because it’s not right that you are shouldering the responsibility alone.

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Oh mommy. When you’re ready please do go to court. I know it’s hard but try. And I’m here if you need anything. Please DM me and we can chat further.

[@buhleshezi3274]

I also dnt have energy to fight. I keep 8t moving. God will deal with them

[@sinazomaqoko6028]

@@TheMillennialMom1 Hi Mommy, how does one dm you on this channel!?

[@hildadavids217]

I blame this Government, it is patriarchal always protects the man. If they were strict enough, these men will not go around making kids around every corner. They must garnish his salary and he must go home with zero money. These useless men they don't have any shame left sies.

[@karaboprisca1155]

I'm so glad your lawyer was there because I know you would have accepted R1000,00 if he wasn't there. Big shout out to your lawyer! Super proud of you mama❣

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thank you baby ♥️♥️

[@ntokozonomasikomsomi]

Knowing her, she really would’ve accepted it! I’m glad she didn’t!🤞🏽

[@jay02021]

This is so encouraging. I’m gaining the strength to take the father of my child to court. Mind you we planned the child together and we were together for over 6 years. He lives a lavish lifestyle. It’s annoying having to deal with a grown man that just refuses to do the right thing for their own flesh and blood. 😞

[@Anything-Anywhere103]

I love this wish young single mothers can watch this and not just sit and say karma will get him while the kid could have better things

[@sophiavutomitshabalala9283]

I've been through this journey, but mine was less dramatic than yours. One thing i love about the magistrate is that they are super brutal to deadbeats and you can't bullshit them. I wish more women had the courage to do right by their kids and lessen their financial burden as the law is on their sides.

[@lindokuhlemnguni4177]

Thank you so icy for this ladies.. I have just gathered the strength to just start this process , I had given up

[@noziphokhumalo2963]

This is so sad, I'm literally in tears because these men don't understand how much they HURT their kids. How evil do you have to be to not even be interested in raising your own child. I'm so sorry you had yo go through this, you are a great mother and you have us routing for you. 💜💜💜💜💜💜

[@thembisaodendaal]

I'm so upset for your part Amanda simply because I should be fighting this fight but I dont have the strength. You are an angel

[@Thoughtsbyme-ts4jz]

You got an interim order 😭💃🏾💃🏾😭💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾😭😭😭😭😭 this video has made me so happy

[@01Snay]

I'm so proud of you and even more inspired by you 🥺🥺🥺 Thank you for being so generous with your experiences. I've been wrestling with the idea of filing for maintenance but have been supressed by the "stigma". And what has that silence done for me "Zero". I have now decided to start the process, building a paper trail over the next few months etc. Thank you sis ❤️🙏🏾

[@pulanemo3556]

You’re so brave mommy- thank you for sharing your story with us. Wish you and the girls all the best 💓 much love

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thank you babe ♥️♥️

[@bekz3]

I can't belive the effort he made to actually run away from being served the papers 😯

[@dorothyosoko4661]

Congratulations 👏 Mama and your children. My ex husband left for 10 yrs ago and never even bother to support my daughters. But I thank God for everything. Be blessed and believe in God

[@neo_tshelane]

Hey momma thank you always inspiring us. The way I relate to your story, I had downloaded this video and watched it while at the salon in this morning. I literally wailed thinking back at the whole process and how even 3 years later he still won’t pay a single cent for his kids 💔 I literally have to gather up strength every 2/3 months to go back to court cos honestly it’s more about the kids than my pride

[@lungilemamuremi6692]

Hi sis. No mother should go through this for their kids. One would hope in the modern days men would do what is right for their kids. My prayers and hugs to you.

[@bekz3]

You are such a strong women it's really funny how many excuses he came up with and they all not valid ... from experience with my dad they definitely don't take nonsense at court they always stand with us mothers welldone definitely inspiring alot of women ❤

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thanks so much babe. I will definitely continue to fight this

[@boitymapeko6020]

I’m very proud of you mommy, you are doing well❤️

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thanks so much love

[@kekemotsepe5002]

Sis I just found your channel today and this is the second video I watched, but I just want to wish you all the best. You are a great mom! I'm so emotional watching this as someone who was raised by a single mom myself. I'm not one but I have so much respect for single mothers! They are the best members of society! You got this my Sis!

[@gugumillicent8505]

Thank you for sharing much love to you and ur kids Alwande will grow and be successful then I🐶 will be telling people that's my child sies some men have no shame, no dignity and no self love whatsoever

[@Her_Self..]

Gosh this man is putting a curse on "the children he loves" and blessing the one he hates without him realising. Its so sad that he is gonna need her at his lowest and the other kids wont even be able to help him😢. Karma will serve him dont worry

[@nompumelolo]

Lol keep wishing

[@LethoHali]

Yoh! So happy for you! Jonga ngoku, I bet he wishes he could’ve given you the R500 now! Yeyi sana!

[@sisandanyuswa2453]

Yho! I can't think of anything that's probably more frustrating than dealing with a deadbeat. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this mama 🥺❤️

[@TheMillennialMom1]

It’s frustrating and hurtful babe. Yhuu.

[@sesethud]

Cry as much as you need to, sthandwa. Then get up and continue my love. You are doing a great job with your girls and you deserve all the good things coming your way.

[@kwazeybear]

I’m so sorry you are going through this… I literally cried watching this

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thank you mommy ♥️♥️

[@thandomlotshwa6101]

I'm appearing in court tomorrow. Finally opened a case against my baby father after 1 year. This was informative and comforting, thanks for the interim order plug will make sure I raise that tomorrow. Thanks for making this video sisi, you've gained a subscriber ❤❤❤❤

[@ziphezinhlemoyo4895]

I love and admire you so much. I’m a single mom to a toddler, you give me motivation to keep going. You’re doing amazing🤍

[@mphom7091]

Hi you are so brave sis. Don't stop fighting until your child gets what she deserves.

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thank you Mpho ♥️♥️

[@daobae9343]

New here and going through the same thing, I do everything thing alone and don’t ask for much or anything for them. I’m just waiting on my lawyer for the next process.

[@summernova3144]

Clients can be ungrateful, April 2022 I got the Respondent to settle maintenance he agreed to R5000.00 monthly payment and seasonal clothing and uniform. He is also willing to purchase electronics such as a cellphone and laptop. My client said I didn't assist her enough she wanted R10000.00 Maintenance. Lesson Stop comparing yourself to the baby daddies wife, court granted R3000.00 maintenance and clothing only.

[@TheMillennialMom1]

No ways 😭😭😭😭

[@summernova3144]

@@TheMillennialMom1 I know it was so dishearten after the Court gave that order as I warned her that she is fighting the wrong fight. But I am glad that you got assistance. Maintenance process can be frustrating but definitely worth it in the end.

[@phanarapitsi8329]

This video made me cry,I know exactly what you are going through. It hurts to the core. My court date is 09 May.

[@zamangubane1900]

You've done an incredible job mama. Your kids are blessed to have you. Thank you for your bravery, and for letting us into what seems like such an intimate and emotional journey.

[@nachimwilz]

My daughter is turning 15 and the donor has never given me a single cent for her upkeep. We are comfortable and I am able to give her a good life. We live in different countries so it is not possible to take him to court. Besides she has a better life with him. He is the biggest lover on this planet

[@katlegolegodi8882]

I am on this journey myself, it takes everything in me I cannot even focus on other areas of myself.... Thank you so much for sharing❤️

[@Thoughtsbyme-ts4jz]

Oh i saw you tweeting that you might put up a video today. I am fed, I have some wine. I am really hopeful you get everything in this court case

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thank you baby ♥️♥️

[@Thoughtsbyme-ts4jz]

@@TheMillennialMom1 we really support you and also drag him again on Twitter. Imagine that idiot thinking to bring it up in court like it absolves him from responsibility

[@pollysekwala3442]

SHuuuu justice prevails, I am so happy with this because he brought this upon himself. Tjeses!!!!

[@thembisaodendaal]

Kudos to the pro bono lawyer you are doing God's work

[@busishauntelle]

You are so brave mommy 🥺❤️❤️ Wish you all the strength in the world ❤️

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thanks so much babe ❤️❤️

[@thembisaodendaal]

Thank you girl you are a worrior for all of us..I feel like the wife needs to be exposed how can she be shielding this man

[@karabomonyai2917]

She thinks it can't happen to her. She should also be in court to take notes... So that when her turn comes atleast she knows what to do🙄

[@Ditshwanelo]

I'm so proud of you! Ekare nka didietsa!💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾. I literally ululated🥰

[@TheMillennialMom1]

♥️♥️♥️

[@refiloelegoale1140]

Hai bandla men have it so easy hey. It shocks me all the time!

[@MacgloryPalai]

Hi, this is a kind of spirit that is following you. It's not good at all. I wish you get a loving partner who will give you a Queen treatment and don't want babies but love your girls. You deserve to be happy and enjoy life. This is just too much. Keep praying and rebuke those spirits❤😢

[@its_just_me3214]

I am taking the father to court as well. The first appearance is actually this Monday!

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Mommy. All the best ♥️♥️♥️

[@nosisekodidi3111]

Stumbled across of your page and I’m in love. So proud of you. I wish you didn’t have to be but you’re the epitome of strong… well done mama ❤️❤️

[@phykilemaduna]

Uyimbokodo, you are so brave 💞May God give you more strength mommy. 💐

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thanks so much love 🥺🥺

[@mslettiemathibe71]

Hi mommy😘 you are brave. I'm definitely sharing this with my mom & cousin. Thanks for sharing the journey with us .. Fight ❤ keep doing it for your daughter.

[@TheMillennialMom1]

♥️♥️♥️. I will definitely continue babe

[@simphiwentshangase3247]

My daughter is also 13. I also need that extra R500 on some days and I wish he was supportive but I just continue with my life as if he was dead. I really don't have the strength to fight someone to be There! Don't give up and know God is father to the fatherless when all is said and done 🙏

[@kwazeybear]

Oh friend you’re also here…. It’s so sad what men put us through 🥺🤞🏽

[@simphiwentshangase3247]

It's just heartless! Kodwa bazokhula lanantwana. Nathi sikhulile sikhuliswa oGogo imali ingekho.

[@TheMillennialMom1]

♥️♥️♥️♥️. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this.

[@LethoHali]

So interested to know how he was when you guys were in love! 😄

[@yonelazote9960]

I can recall you during your pregnancy with alwande you actually deserve his entere salary nje, it's 13 years already where did this time go now you making me feel so old ....well done

[@TheMillennialMom1]

♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@leahsonnie3325]

I love that book under your table,'what a time to be alone '

[@thembisaodendaal]

Love the friend she's here for it all

[@kgothatsodavhie7288]

Proud of you Mandy❤️. Sending all the love to you and Alwande

[@aliciamphothulo776]

I'm so proud of you and you're doing a great job ❤️I love you babes❤️❤️❤️ you are strong and never doubt that 🤗🤗🤗

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thank you baby

[@meemwaakavlogs715]

Lemme hop on Deadbeats need to start supporting their offspring

[@lisad355]

Always lawyer up in these situations. In my country, we have access to free attorneys if we can’t afford to pay for one.

[@sihlekhanyile1057]

Starting my journey.

[@joeymakhale7955]

Hi girl, I'm just stunned you amazing. Well I'm single mom of 2 serving two guys too similar process hard but with it. Mara I just can't belive these jerks are everywhere yoh stunned!

[@nwabisajijana586]

Hi, I'm going through the same situation, I just need prayers Your video is helping me. I just signed the documents, problem now is that he left eastern cape,and I don't know what does that mean 😔.. but your vd is helping

[@thembisaodendaal]

Don't back down girl...well done for your bravery

[@nickiesibs4557]

I don't have kids, but I am so hurt and so angry with what this man is doing!!! And that woman calling your child a bastard... wow!! Wow!! Wow!! Humans are vuil man.

[@Bu_Lee]

Kudos 👏 to you, I wish I had your strength 💪. All will be well..

[@khomotsom1535]

Good work, well done mama!

[@unathikave548]

I have a 2 year old. His father was supporting up to almost a year ago he just decided he will stop. And he was never involved as a father. My son is over 2 years and in school I work 2 jobs and freelance so that he can have the best life. I am thinking of maintenance but I just do not have the emotional capacity to go through it plus we live in different provinces which is the real reason why I already feel drained.

[@karabomonyai2917]

Gyma babe. We got ur back. Do it for ur kids✊

[@ntokozonomasikomsomi]

We.👏🏽 Don’t.👏🏽Skip.👏🏽Ads!👏🏽

[@thembisaodendaal]

You are doing great my love...you are a better person than me I would probably not be able to accept money from him.I dont know for me it's that thing of he does not want to do it with an open heart but I get it our children need to live and eat.i suppose its mh arrogance and ego talking...kudos to you girl

[@thembisaodendaal]

Omg I love the fire in the background

[@Yassmiinn.]

Same

[@chichimuyoba1678]

Strength to you mommy!

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thanks sooo much my love ♥️♥️

[@khensanebaloyi6835]

Imagine moving out because you don't want to support your own child. Yah Men can be evil. I'm proud of you mama❤️❤️😍

[@thatotwala4731]

You are so amazing 😘 Modimo agofe maatla.

[@reimaginingsiphokazi]

Hide your moves babe… just for safety sake…

[@NdinaNehemia]

I’m laughing at the level of deadbeat of this dude. Yoh guys!!!!!! No man shuu😩😩😩😩

[@zolamhlontlo2084]

Hi mommy ,all the best dear ❤️❤️❤️...How i wish i could share mine with you

[@Lesegoo3753]

Hi sisi lots of love ❤ I discovered ur channel and I'm proud of you 👏 I too I'm a single parent he parent whn ever he feel like it

[@Lesegoo3753]

emotionally it's draining

[@HalfaDozenFamily]

13 years 😭🙆🏽‍♀️ im soo sorry mommy 😍

[@HalfaDozenFamily]

The fact that women have to run after men to be involved or even support their kids is 🤮. Really.

[@HalfaDozenFamily]

And you are not even expecting much from him. I’m so sorry mommy. ❤️❤️❤️sending you lots of love .

[@kamohelonyamane7439]

Exactly.

[@louiscanthyshakela88]

You are so strong dear.

[@uMamaKaPozoPozo]

God grant you more strength….

[@nomandlakhumalo2652]

Wish you all the best with this journey😘😘😘

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Thank you baby

[@angelamanda1343]

Love and light to you Mands ❤

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Love you Ang

[@lebogangmathabathe91]

I have so many questions and comments The wives of deadbeats , don’t they advice them to take care of their children? Or they are just happy that their kids are taken care of? He willingly takes care of his other children but he is not willing to take care of his first born child? So if he is in debt, what does he think his child is eating on the daily? Besides he is not in debt because of the child mos? He was willing to go into debt for other things except his child’s school fees for example?

[@TheMillennialMom1]

His wife sent me a message saying she’s tired talking to him but she’s not gonna force him to do anything. I think she was just tryna exempt herself but it’s whatever. It’s painful when a man proudly takes care of his other kids but refuses to take care of his first born. It hurts beyond words

[@sisanakay]

I think it is unfair to hold the wives accountable. She can encourage him to support but cannot enforce it if he doesn't want to. You ladies know how men are and besides, the wife wasn't a part of your relationship. Do what you need to do(legal measures) and leave the wife out of it. This is another example of how men are capable of making us women hate one another.

[@TheMillennialMom1]

@@sisanakay to be married or be in a relationship with a deadbeat says a lot about you as a woman. How are you ok knowing that there’s a child out there who’s not being supported while yours have the best? Deadbeats thrive coz there are women who don’t mind protecting them. Society needs to chuck deadbeats so they learn their lesson but they won’t coz there are women who are marrying them. So yes, everyone around him, his wife, mom, side chicks, friends will catch smoke coz they coddle him.

[@sisanakay]

@@TheMillennialMom1 it actually says a lot about the man, I believe a good one becomes responsible without having to be taken to court. Like you keep saying, you can't force him to be in your childs life. We don't know the wifes side of the story and cannot assume that she's protecting him.In some cases these men don't even tell us they have kids until such happens. I cannot then be expected to leave him instantly because I'm also hurting and need support. I hope some day you'll be able to bring some ladies(wives), honest people who have experienced this and talk about it on your channel. I'm so sorry you're going through all this,I'm as emotional as you are and hlezi ngikhala nawe la. You're doing great Mama❤️

[@lebogangmathabathe91]

@Thobile Khumalo the reason I am mentioning the wives is not to hold them accountable. A man listens and value the opinion of the woman he is sleeping with or married to. My hubby has a child with his ex, I make sure the child is not treated differently. When it’s winter for example, and he gives me the budget for clothes, I divide it by the number of kids that I know of, how can I just be exempted from this?

[@shabdine]

Well done mama

[@uMamaKaPozoPozo]

Similar situation,hopefully one day we could have a conversation..🙏

[@masegomasibi3048]

Hey Ma'am hope you well❤ for some reason I watched this vlog again and learned that you can trace a person. Is it possible to do that without an ID number?

[@khensybakes]

What an absolute loser of a person. I wish you all the financial blessings so you never have to deal with pathetic deadbeats again and just raise your babies peacefully, get them and yourself some therapy. Let God deal with the deadbeat… he always does. ❤️

[@TheMillennialMom1]

I Receive. Thank you so much babe

[@melmel5345]

How is it going for you now? I have to be going through the same...although in court he still let the money add up and pays months after or every time before our next court date. It is so expensive and he wants to reduce from the little he is not paying on time. I get emotional like yourself so hard to speak and the lies he tells to try to get out of paying or now to get a reduction is so stressful.

[@shabdine]

I’m dealing with the same narcissistic my son is 2 years now and he didn’t provide me with nothing not even socks 🧦 for his child I had to get child M involved this man left his job Now he’s there living with another woman also this woman she have 2 kids That’s crazy

[@tebellomotabaaletta9988]

Love & light Mama ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@LethoHali]

These men can be so impossible at times!

[@nokuthulamdokwe4107]

You give me strength

[@lionking1621]

I'm in kenya I don't know where to start at ....the man is busy making babies

[@uMamaKaPozoPozo]

Hope Alwande doesn’t know about the effort we had to go through to get her dad to cooperate…

[@tebogomphahlele7331]

Prayer 🙏

[@mpoomzadube1429]

❤❤

[@jazzy-hq8er]

Why would you tell him you was serving him 🤦🏽‍♀️ Also you should have been served him when your child was baby your child deserved that from the beginning…. got to think smarter I am proud 🥲 you staying strong and kudos to lawyers…

[@Yassmiinn.]

Unhelpful!

[@jazzy-hq8er]

@@Yassmiinn. how is this unhelpful it’s call tough love she knows she dealing with deadbeat so why be honest with him… sugarcoating things is the problem

[@refiloelegoale1140]

Why is it your problem that he’s bankrupt? Umtwana still needs to survive though, what is he saying about that? Yhuuu hai this guy!

[@maxtube7207]

Why do people hate maintaining their blood

[@kea768]

I hope you get the full R4000

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Babe, it's the 4th today and he hasnt even paid the R1500 he was supposed to pay on the 27th. LOL. This man is a joke

[@kea768]

@@TheMillennialMom1 he just needs to get arrested 1 good time for violating court orders. Lol! Just 1 good time…I bet he’ll never miss a payment ever again. Sending you strength mama. You’re so brave.

[@nompumelelompumi619]

Can I please have the tracer’s contacts mama?

[@tatsohrams]

I like you ❤️❤️

[@mslettiemathibe71]

Please share the lawyer's details

[@TheMillennialMom1]

Here you go love You can contact us on 081 744 4628 or [e-mail]

[@gittakasirye6958]

Electricity