i forced myself to slay depression (and failed miserably)

turns out you can't slay the depression away....... but maybe Glee can........
even though my depression "glow up" didn't work like I hoped, I still think it's important to show that life isn't perfect and it's okay if you try something similar and don't feel how you hoped you would. sending love to everyone who needs it!!
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time stamps
0:00-2:04 intro
2:04-7:26 dying my hair
7:26-9:38 cooking myself a nice meal
9:38-14:05 trying to pick out a cute outfit
14:05-17:19 some thoughts & feelings
17:19-18:10 I broke my toe :)
18:10-19:23 final feelings/outro

[@Abhishekxsahu]

As another gay teenager who has same body type as u i feel so good seeing u be so comfortable in being yourself ❤. It gives me inspiration to do the same

[@lovejessicablair]

💗💗💗💗💗💗💗

[@luudupree22]

girl you planned to slay and you slayed by educating people about mental struggles and just being real about all of it. as someone who struggles with her own mental issues, I really felt and understood the things you said and your thought process. being a hot girl / looking good is fun, and also physical appearance should not be judged and valued as more worthy than who the person is at their core, because getting to hear their thoughts, their mind, who they are, man -- that's what makes life worth living to me.

[@lovejessicablair]

appreciate u and ur kind words a lot :”) also very much agree with everything u said!

[@aperson3800]

I loved how honest this video is. I am currently depressed and what has been the most helpful has been just not forcing things and trying to focus on just what feels good. Giving our selves time to mentally rest.

[@lovejessicablair]

sending you lots of love 💗💗

[@AG72980]

“It will all be ok in the end. If it doesn’t feel ok, it’s not the end”. Love from LA! ❤️

[@rebeccatomlin3916]

Living with depression is such a whirlwind rollercoaster. The constant effort it requires is exhausting but from one depressed girly to another - proud of you for showing up. Try, try again. Surround yourself with love and remember I’m proud of you friend ❤️❤️

[@lovejessicablair]

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ thank you my love!!

[@annecyd2589]

It's both comforting and depressing to know someone this pretty, smart and cool can have depression too ✌️

[@lenny7971]

Thank you so much for still posting this. Glow up videos have been the bane of my existence as another depressed person who tried to slay their way out of it

[@dirthmother]

Loaf could be the lost twin sister of my cat 😂 The creaky door voice, the white fur accents and the needy attitude as soon as I approach the door are all there

[@lovejessicablair]

aww I love that 😭 every time I meet a cat with a smokers voice (what me and my bf call it) I always think of Loaf :”)

[@win0n4]

your content speaks to such a deep part of me. Thank you so much for making the videos you do and being yourself

[@lovejessicablair]

aw I really needed to hear that today :”) thank you so much my love

[@itstomie_xo]

the cover of this vid is giving such a “my year of rest and relaxation” vibe!! also, i totally get the urge to slay when im feeling sad, because what do you mean im feeling like shit AND also feeling ugly?? nuh uhh

[@jeanetteyarbrough3286]

It is! I'm currently reading it.

[@sierratrowbridge8866]

For me, I definitely need to layer up on things that make me feel better. Dopamine dressing and dopamine rich food, plus videos of my special interests, doing something creative, or journaling

[@zannadunstrand6289]

Super brave of you to talk about this! And I agree with you about all of it - my mental health have been really bad from time to time. And to make yourself look better - ✨”slaying”✨ - with make up, clothes and hair, can REALLY make you feel better mentally too. Just to get up from bed and take care of yourself with all those things every day, to get that as a rutine, really help! I think there are studies about this to back it up. I can swear i’ve heard of atleast one! As I said in a comment in a earlier video (shorts i think): you’re such a rolemodel for us other bigger girls. Thank you for all you do! You’re totally ✨SLAYING✨ always! 👊🏻

[@zannadunstrand6289]

Can’t belive I got Jessica to read AND LIKE this comment to 🫣🫣 that’s just amazing - got a bit starstukked both times 🫣🫣😍😂

[@douglaswasanoddduck8900]

Thanks for this ❤. Sometimes depression baddies just need to be sad together

[@Ladyannwho]

been experiencing a lot of the same feelings lately... but it's a bit of a reassurance to recognize this in others. also feel so alienated from others when i will share how i'm feeling lately and the one thing they can say back is but oh you've been looking so good lately though!!!! the assumption that people make (and i used to make as well) that if you can reach some kind of beauty standard and be seen as attractive that that magically solves deep-rooted insecurities, depression anxiety, .... in my opinion another way in which we can objectify ourselves and others. fuck that and thank you for being vulnerable and sharing

[@Caitlin_Composure]

Doing my happy dance because Jess posted a new video :’)

[@lovejessicablair]

:”) 💗💗💗💗💗

[@claralipfert824]

I watched this video after having a meltdown bc I was trying to get ready to go to my friend's birthday drinks but I couldn't get my hair to look right and then I wasn't sure about the outfit I put on & eventually I gave up on trying to wrangle my appearance into something I liked and realised I just needed to stay home .. anyway I thought you looked amazing in the velvet dress + tights combo but I totally understand that putting pressure on yourself to feel better can be really overwhelming and counterproductive

[@mattmcgee2830]

I'm 28 I needed to hear this when I was 13 thank you. It's always hard but you made me feel normal cause I try to slay depression too 😅 sad baddies for the win

[@lovejessicablair]

sad baddies ftw ‼️

[@Oliver-765]

Vibes, I feel a lot of this. I can't always "fix" how I'm feeling, but I can at least do stuff to feel more comfortable physically.

[@Ursula-Sue14]

Ride it out. Don't force it. The down time is followed by creativity. Do some "bed rotting" Be easy on youself.. This to shall pass

[@lovejessicablair]

am currently bed rotting. thank u for the validation

[@rebeccatomlin3916]

Cat purrs and cuddles have carried me through my current sad season lol sending you all the good vibes sweet bean 💖💖💖

[@elspethdyce6771]

I love you so much ❤ I can’t express how happy you’ve made me feel about myself

[@lisakirushatova7695]

Thank you angel! Truly honest and and beautiful!

[@bananamary5907]

ty for being so vulnerable, all will be ok soon❤️ i just discovered your long form content and im enamored, you are loved Jess🫶🏻

[@Cheirosa81]

The power of slaying! I call it weaponized glamour ❤.

[@taylorosterhuber9181]

I love this entire video. The amount of time & energy you put into all of these is just motivating -- also the amount of love your cat has for you !!! I love seeing folks actively practicing self compassion, because that's really what this is. Strengthening the self trust by saying "I know I'll be okay" is such a small thing that's soooo important. It's the very last layer we have before real destruction. **also didn't know watching someone go on a walk would be so therapeutic bc working in an office all day gets so stuffy so this helped. Thanks for breakin up the monotony~

[@lovejessicablair]

aww thank you so much!!! everything u said is so sweet :”) it’s also always funny to me cause Loaf was my boyfriends cat before we met/moved in together and even though he’d do anything for her, our bond is just unmatched ‼️ I’m glad I could help + sending u so much love!!

[@MegaFicklePickle]

I just wanna say, like many others, how comforting it is to see other people show this. I've been pretty depresso the last couple weeks myself, with almost no understanding as to why, so it's nice to remember that others get that way too! Thank you =)

[@bella-tt9hk]

I feel all of this and it’s comforting to see people normalize sharing their feelings. 💙

[@normalizabortion6954]

the WAY this motivated me today

[@darlinehandley493]

Ups and downs always! It is okay, I promise. Keep going because it is so worth it! You are awesome!

[@stellafournodavlou108]

insomniac since the age of 16, traumatic childhood, finally submerged into functional depression at the age of 21 after a horrible break-up and got demonised by my ex for it... so exhausted but honestly also happy to see the come out of their way to support me, and giving me hope in the fact that not every human relationship is superficial and fictitious and pretentious... just my two cents of experience, happy to hear you talk about it... also relatively restoring my sleep as of the last two months... it's the baby steps

[@acetabulumshots]

I literally never thought to cook eggs that way and now I actually can't wait for Monday morning to try it and have some kind of joy before I start my dreary job

[@Me.675]

Your amazing keep the grinding going!

[@dirthmother]

Also, you look so damn good in that black velvet dress!!!! And I'm extremely jealous of the kitty shoes 😺

[@lovejessicablair]

ahh ty!! the shoes are from t.u.k. footwear btw!

[@Meowzer030]

I’m gonna need a makeup tutorial on this look ur wearing with the minimal eyeliner pls 💗💗💗💗

[@chuckletcake580]

ı love watching your videos they are comforting to me thank you❤

[@zingakielinska]

Yesss to closet declutter! I love this kind of videos!

[@CozyToni]

I loved this video ❤ thank you for sharing 😊

[@mysunflower2006]

this makes my day (I've been studying for my finals all day) :")

[@lovejessicablair]

good luck on ur finals!!

[@mysunflower2006]

​@@lovejessicablairthx queen❤

[@Desgrange_band]

Love your content 😍😍❤ hope you feel better soon. You are an I c o n ❣️

[@PassionForOldFashion]

Baaabe! Those negative thoughts are actually not your fault! Depression = dorsal vagal shutdown = intrusive thoughts & thoughts you can't control . Please read about Polyvagal theory & your nervoussystem !! ❤️❤️

[@samiansley5740]

I L❤VE your co-host. Amazing duo. Y’all slayed.

[@abigailjolene]

This video is not a fail. It’s raw and honest

[@lovejessicablair]

💗💗💗💗

[@PBottomPoochies]

I go as long as 6 months before I color my hair. Sure I get roots (grey bc I’m old) but I’m poor (I get my hair highlighted and it’s as expensive as 💩). Hi Loaf! Great to see your kitty! Good for the BF in stepping up! He’s a keeper!

[@emilyk5947]

4am here… this video was so relaxing and relatable.. now I don’t want to watch anything else. Nothing will compare

[@lovejessicablair]

🥺💗💗💗💗 ur the sweetest!!

[@emilyk5947]

@@lovejessicablair 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

[@dawncollinsonquarry4039]

You f❤❤❤ing Slayed you look gorgeous and I promise you your depression and anxiety will pass you will be ok

[@AmberOrtolano]

omggg I’ve been feeling like this too queen 😭💔

[@lovejessicablair]

sending you love, angel 🥺💞💕💗💞💕

[@Abhishekxsahu]

Relatable title 😂

[@lo8932]

love u,, goodluck

[@verymuch4579]

I grew up eating off those Apple plates!

[@lizzielz]

💗💗💗

[@Jade-po1yf]

I felt very seen in this video ! But slaying helps most of the time 😅 but therapy has helped me more. Also tomorrow is my 25 and Fine Birthday

[@lovejessicablair]

happy birthday!!!! 💗💞💕💘💕💞💗

[@ahhhhhhhhhhhhh42069]

I love when cool girls on the internet are having depression episodes the same time as me like look at us together in this moment how beautiful

[@lovejessicablair]

sending u so so much love and hugs

[@DeePeeZee]

Lol it's literally snowing out right now. I can't see anything out. I'm always sad about living alone and sad about my life not looking like everyone else's. I do have a therapist but don't see them till Monday.

[@lovejessicablair]

living alone can be tough, I did that for a year and it definitely didn’t help my depression. as for your life not looking like everyone else’s, I’m not sure if this will bring you any comfort but I think a lot of people worry about that! I know I definitely do. sending you lots of love 💗💗💗

[@fioe911]

me clicking on this video already depressed: youtube: fatphobic weight loss ad that felt targeted

[@artistmimic]

💞💕

[@user-qk2qm5ju8e]

you play bass?!

[@cocteautwin]

i also get therapy from the school of santana lopez

[@FoundSheep-AN]

Your bedroom in the thumbnail looks straight out of a tv series from the ‘90 or the early 2000! Please do a room tour or a video talking about room decor and design, forniture etc Jess try deepening your religious and spiritual side, go to Holy Mass on Sunday morning and try to pray to God I didn’t understand if you left your mother’ s house and now you live with your boyfriend? Did you move city or something?

[@lovejessicablair]

I think I still wanna add some elements to my bedroom but I definitely will in the future! as for religion, I’m Jewish and not a very religious person. also I’ve lived with my boyfriend for the past several years but we moved to NJ from Illinois last summer!

[@debbiep7150]

I really hope you find a therapist and can get better!😢❤ I know how hard it can be. Please know I’m saying this with the best intentions, but I’ve recently been diagnosed with severe depression but because I’ve lost a loved one suicide I’ve always been scared to use the term “depression” for myself since I’ve never been suicidal. There are many forms of depression even seasonal ones, and all of them are valid and should be taken seriously! I just think we should be careful when using terms like “depression” and “trauma” as to not take away from the fact that they are conditions with a serious impact on life. I’m not criticizing you or your video by any means! I merely hope that we can all acknowledge mental health issues and talk about it even in real life❤️ (I’m honestly scared to talk about it with people and I know many are)

[@lovejessicablair]

hi, there’s a lot I don’t talk about/have never talked about on social media because it’s my personal life and there’s a lot I don’t wanna broadcast to strangers on the internet. I do have depression and I do consider myself to have a lot of trauma that I’ll probably never talk about publicly. I get what you mean and I know you have good intentions, but also remember that just because you watch someone online, doesn’t mean that you know everything about them/their experiences and their mental health. sending you lots of love and I’m so so sorry for your loss! ❤️

[@debbiep7150]

@@lovejessicablair oh no I totally didn’t mean it that way and I’m so sorry that it did! I would never make assumptions about anyone and I totally get that you don’t talk about it online. I know people make assumptions about me a lot and that’s why I’m often times scared to open up. I therefore wanted to highlight how talking about mental health issues online differs from the way it is perceived in real life. I wish you all the best!

[@lovejessicablair]

no worries at all! I think existing on the internet can just make you defensive sometimes cause people think they know you so well/personally because of what they see online! sorry if I came off that way at all + I wish you all the best as well

[@debbiep7150]

⁠​⁠@@lovejessicablair yes I totally get it! You don’t need to apologize! I’m sorry that my comment was counterproductive. I never want to deny anyone’s struggles! I’ve seen it so much unfortunately, because the toughest battles often take place without anyone noticing. Power to you and thanks for your kindness❤️