I Nearly Gave Up on My Dream of Being an Illustrator

In this video I share a set back that happened to me in the years following my graduation, that nearly made me give up on my dream career. Becoming freelance is tricky! There will always be set backs and rejection, but I hope by sharing my experience it will give you the courage to keep trying!
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[@lidewijdevries4444]

Hi Holly, a big thumbs up for telling this story! I've experienced something similar so I'll tell a bit of my story in case it helps other artists. Like your story helps! I went to art school in Amsterdam where I studied full time for four years. Before that I studied art for three years part time at a small art school near my home but it wasn't quite as big as studying art full time in Amsterdam. which was a very traditional art school. No modern art and the learning method was basically drawing and painting as the old masters did back in history. I really loved it and I learned so incredibly much. I never could have been there where I am now in my skills without that art academy. But....I wanted to become an illustrator. And mostly childrensbook illustrations. So in my final year I chose to do a childrensbook illustration project. Something no one really did because everyone just picked a main catagory in landscape, model, still life, portrait etc. But....I wanted to do childrensbook illustration. So I did. And everyone kind of lifted their brows at my work because it was something completely different than the main traditional thing at that art school. But since I was allowed to do illustration, I just went for it. During that whole project in my final year I was under a lot of stress because my dad was dying. He had been chronically ill for most of his life and I wanted nothing more than graduate while he was still alive. So I worked very hard and set everything on graduating and making my dad proud. So I finished my project and on the day that I was suppose to hear if I passed or not, I got an email from the academy with all the names of my fellow students. Everyone passed....except me. I can not even begin to describe how devistated I was. I was utterly crushed. Was my work bad? Well...no...most people liked it very much and praised me for being different. All the teachers at school encouraged me. The jury however (2 academy art teachers and 2 highly respected artists from Amsterdam) thought otherwise. They thought that my work showed too much of several things and for them it was kind of unclear of wat I wanted as an artist. It appeared to be 3 against one. So they failed me. At that time....I kind of gave up too. I didn't even show up for the feedback on my work. I was done. My art career was in my opinion done and more importantly...my dad would die very soon. So after that crushing email and while every graduate in my year celebrated their art exhibition at school, I as focussing on the last time I had left with my dad which was about 8 weeks. After he died I didn't touch a paint brush for at least a year. I had started a painting from the time my dad was still alive and I couldn't bring myself to finish it. So It remained unfinished in my studio. Eventually I pushed myself to pick up a brush and finish the painting. From there on I found my strength back and once again set myself on the road to become a freelance artist/illustrator. Diploma or not. I am glad I did not give up and picked up my art career because I am doing quite well for a starting freelancer at the moment. And honestly...no one is asking for my diploma if I take on an art job right? Looking back on that final art school year....I do confess it still left a bit of a wound. But I also see that they were right in a way. The work wasn't so bad....but it was scattered and didn't show a clear direction. I guess I had to find that direction on my own. So again thumbs up for telling your story! As you can see you were not the only one. But we pick ourselves up and just continue because we can't help it! We have to be creative! 😉 P.S Woops! Just realised I made a very long story :P Sorry about that! ^^

[@minhojung1962]

thank you for your story. :-)

[@BrLambert]

Thank you Holly for your story, I can see the disappointment of rejection but the hard work you put into your work (nearly blood sweat and tears) was practice for your successful sheep assignment. I"m hoping to have my work on cards, t's and animation, but have had much disappointment from computers crashing, to people thinking they can control my "pen", I'm still persevering. I feel like I am carving through a forest to get to the other side. (BTW for those who think it's too late because you're older to go to school, I graduated at 55 in web design)

[@MalamikArt]

This is positively helpful, especially for those of us that are entering our 40's and still need hope. Thanks :)

[@katlegodidit]

Thanks for sharing this. Though I'm more of an animator, I can still relate. Last year (2019) I took on a big commission, but just as I had just started working, my most trusted laptop stopped working. Luckily I had an extra machine, but unfortunately I didn't know how to operate it. Time was running out and I had to setup, learn and work with this new unfamiliar tool simultaneously. Out of fear that the client might be getting impatient, I stopped opening and answering emails, although I was still sending progress reports. After a while I stopped receiving emails from the client. Nonetheless, I finished the project, sent it, and waited. But I got no reply. I started feeling bitter, so I sent the project to the client's client since I had their contacts from project files. And I told them it was a gift since it was "Women's day" (they were an all women team). Soon after, the client (that had commissioned me) called for the first time and scolded me over the phone. She was so furious, I actually started shaking listening to her. At some point I wanted to hangup, but I stopped myself. She even threatened to get me "blacklisted" (as if it's possible), and demanded an apology which I gave even though I knew it wasn't going to be accepted. I must mention that she had promised me future jobs if all went well. So after everything sunk in and I realised my mistakes I went into a bit of a depression, but found a bit of comfort in the fact that I got myself to finish the project, and against all odds, it was my best work up to that point. Though it didn't make me feel like giving up, for a short while I felt useless and like a failure. I'm just glad there are somewhat relatable stories like yours. That gives me comfort as I continue to make mistakes and constantly question my career choice. It's even harder for me because I have a degree in a completely different field. So every time the dung hits the fan, I can't help but wonder if I should've pursued a "9 to 5". So thanks again for sharing your story, and making my encounters feel a bit less regrettable (for lack of better word).

[@teohyc]

Great inspiring story. Thanks for sharing.

[@paulinefollett3099]

As artists we are on an epic journey. Sometimes the road gets a little rough, but we must continue, despite the hardships.

[@DrFjords]

❤️ Well I would buy the shit out of a Holly Exley home goods collection

[@hollyexley]

haha! thank you! maybe one day!

[@VioletGlitterworks]

Yes!! 😍 I'd love some adorable tea towels!😉💕

[@dougieladd]

Exactly... it's always going to be subjective... we arty types are sensitive folk :) Just remember, it's not personal... and as long as the criticism is constructive there's nothing wrong with being told... it will help you grow as an artist, give you thicker skin, and you'll get better and better. Oh, and one more thing... always remember to push back... ask "why?" and don't let people push you around. Or they'll do it more and more. (I'm an older guy now, it's good to push back, helps with your work and your self worth and confidence) :)

[@anthonybrown238]

Thanks for the inspiration, I've always wanted to make a career out of being an artist. But I didn't think I could make good money, so I never tried. Now, several years and jobs later I realize that using my talent is the only thing that makes me happy. I know I need to follow my dreams no matter what, thanks.

[@angelaschlagel5829]

Thanks for sharing this story! With all the fake perfectionism and posing on social media, it’s nice to listen to something that’s real, and that reminds us that these things happen to all artists, and the thing that matters is that you keep going. 😍

[@tapocketa]

Very lovely that you shared this. I'm glad that you are able to face painting farm animals again :-) I don't mean face-painting farm animals, that's a different career entirely.

[@TheAverageArtist]

This sounds absolutely horrific! So glad you showed them that they were obviously wrong!

[@AncaPoraIllustration]

unfortunately disappointment is part of the deal. not everyone is gonna love your work but you just have to believe in it and find someone that does love it. I am really glad you shared this. I have been going through a rough patch and it's what i need to hear to keep moving forward

[@allisonstone6748]

It's so inspiring! It's was so cool to listen to your story. And the most important is practicing, improving and never give up! As you know, guys, if your plan doesn't work, change the plan, never the goal!👑💕🙌🏻

[@jadesheldon1250]

GIRRRLLLLLL, I started welling up listening to this, haha! I know this pain all to well. It's unexpected & life altering & you feel like you'll never feel whole again. As a fellow illustrator, I too can not speak enough of never giving up. You can't let one job or one person make you feel like you and your art are worthless. They just aren't your audience! You have to keep pushing & keep practicing. So glad you didn't give up on your dreams. I know that homeware job is coming your way!!!

[@BettsiLedesma]

I love that you stayed in it! You are so strong! And I just love your work- so beautiful.

[@rachelstevens9853]

Hi Holly, I'm just about to finish up my final year of studies in illustration this week, and I've been so stressed and nervous about graduating and putting on an exhibition that industry people will see in just a couple of days. I actually teared up a lot while watching this video, and I still feel stressed, but your video has really helped me feel much more determined. Thank you so, so much for always sharing your insights and being honest about what it's like to be an illustrator. Knowing about the stressful and painful parts of trying to get into the industry actually helps me feel like my dream is more realistic, haha. I wish you every dream job and success in the entire world!!!

[@floralfancy7814]

Awww you poor thing. I wish I could've given you a hug.

[@aat10Kyoko]

Thank you for sharing. I’ve spent majority of my career bouncing between graphic design, advertising, marketing, software designs etc etc. And getting laid off of work and quitting jobs. Now I’m working part time and sticking to wild life drawings-whether that lands in sales or freelance, we shall see. Thanks for this post, working in a “creative” field is never a “walk in the park”...as most people think it is.

[@annikaheller3489]

Thank you for opening up so much Holly! I bet this wasn’t an easy video to film. I just split up with my first big client since I went full-time freelance 9 months ago. It was mainly Design, not so much illustration, but it was still painful. They said they were ‚shocked‘ about my work and that I ‚only produce shit and more work for them‘. They still let me work for them so I guess it wasn‘t that bad... After a few more kind of abusive calls to tell me how worthless I am I finally had the guts to leave them. People just underestimate the power of their words when you’re new in the business. I‘m going to work as a waitress in part time too now but I think that‘s okay. I hope I‘ll find my way too.

[@catherineWynnePaton]

Hi Holly, I love your honest and detailed storytelling. Beautiful. Low points and disheartening rejections are all part of the creative journey and these times do make you so much more resilient in the long term. >>>Keep creating!>>>

[@sarahflynn5762]

Glad you didn't give up!!! :)

[@itscarolinemary]

thank you for sharing a personal struggle in your career journey

[@hrthpndrp]

I definitely feel like this brand may have been Primark, it’s not the first time I’ve heard a story a long those lines with that company but if it’s not either way I’m so glad you kept going with your goals because you seem like the nicest person and you are beyond talented. 💛

[@veraschmidt5098]

Oh Holly, you are such a kind and sweet person. It’s so nice of you to tell this story of the beginning of your career. It’s true, there are ups and downs and I am never quite sure to encourage a young girl or boy to become an illustrator unless I really see the urge in their eyes and the absolute will to do it. Because if you have that you cannot get out of it any more and you just HAVE to do it. And when you have a bit of success it’s so worth it! Then it is the most beautiful job in the world. (In my opinion 😄) good, that you didn’t stop because you are a brilliant illustrator and it would have been such a shame if you had wasted your talent. 😘

[@kimreed33]

Thank you Holly 🌸

[@sophiebarrie1596]

Thanks so much for sharing this Holly. I’m in the early stages of chasing a freelance illustrator career also and I know I have hard times ahead of me but hearing this from you just encourages me that when I have my set backs I can keep going because this is my dream too. I know that no other career path could ever make me as happy as this one. Lots of love from Australia:)

[@katec9893]

Thank you for sharing this Holly, I had a bad experience with a big company that commissioned me (also to draw sheep funnily enough!) but they refused to set up any sort of contract and expected me to work 'on spec' at my own expense. They joked about stealing my work and asked if I could copy the style of a famous artist. I cancelled the project, it was a horrible experience and I've not found a client since then. I feel quite lost with how to find paying clients for illustration and surface pattern design but your videos help, thank you.

[@marta3438]

So gratefully for your videos 😊 thank you for sharing 😙😙

[@secretagentraccoon]

I'm in my 3rd year of art school and I always feel like giving up. This was definetly something I needed to hear. So thank you, I will keep going :)

[@heatherinasuitcase]

Really love hearing these stories even though there not the happiest. I also graduated school in 2010 and im working hard to be an illustrator still. Your videos really help continue to inspire me :)

[@MelanieChadwick]

Yep definitely been there. Remember last year was getting up at 5am to work on a project and within a tight deadline and in the end I was told the work was too naive looking and so cancelled...even though I felt I had stuck to the brief, it was disappointing. But following that had some really successful commisions including doing food packaging which I when I see on Sainsburys shelves makes me realise I can do this! Thanks for sharing it does help us all.

[@Lizayslimetime]

I really needed this! Thank you for sharing Holly!

[@mmgringoire2]

I really needed this video today. I'm trying to get my portfolio together to apply for grad school in illustration and it feels like my stuff just isn't good enough, but no matter how frustrated I get I always come back to my art. I know this is what I want to do and I am going to keep trying. BTW I love your videos and I always listen to them when I'm working.

[@jecamartinez]

Thanks for opening up and sharing your story! It's understandable how social media kind of makes us put on a facade that everything's happy and fine, but all these "closed doors" are a very important part of the process! Hearing this story from a very successful illustrator like you makes you all the more relatable! I've also had a particularly heartbreaking experience wherein I felt lead on that this "thing" will happen for me only to be let down, so I've sort of learned not to be too hopeful about certain things unless there is actual proof (like a signed contract, etc)

[@SergeyChernyshev]

Thank you for sharing! It reminds us all that success is about overcoming failures (real or perceived) and requires training our perseverance and sometimes thick skin. I'd also like to add few words from my personal experience - we often hear words of people we though are genuinely interested in our work and treat rejection as personal failure while they might have tons of other commercial reasons and just choose to disappoint people like us, who just enter the industry because it's just easier. Some build their business models on that (e.g. recruiters, content networks and etc.). So irrespective of whatever you feel it is fair or unfair that you got dismissive feedback, don't assume that the message is truthful, they could've had million other reasons and just chose to lie to you. This applies to interviewing for regular jobs, not just freelancing. Just take it easy and move to next opportunity, no matter how much you doubt yourself.

[@Breakfst4dinner]

Currently a graduate working a non-illustrator job, this was exactly what I needed to hear, Thank you Holly!

[@_aiborie]

Your voice is relaxing to listen 'to. This has inspired me indeed and tempered my expectations. Just starting out rn!

[@pinebramble2560]

Oh I needed this! I have experienced a similar situation. It was my first bigger freelance project (not from a big brand although still a job!), and I sent them my first illustrations, and they wrote back that they didn't like them). I was super upset and disappointed with myself, but I wasn't ready to quit because I needed the job at the time, so I put together some other illustrations I thought they would like. Thankfully, they decided to continue on. That period after the rejection was absolutely awful though. Thank you for sharing your experience, its great to hear the perspective of another illustrators experience. Keep painting!

[@jenniferchen5351]

Hi Holly, I am currently studying whilst working full time and having a lots of other commitments. Your story really resonated with me and thank you for sharing it. I've not given up my dream 🙏👍

[@garethgough4112]

Such an inspiring story for all of us artists out there trying our best to make a living through our art and at the same time keep our chins up and take the hits. So glad to know that you didn't allow this really tough set back to stop you in pursuing your dream. I think it is a big part of the process and journey to have situations like this happen to us. I think it gives us a stronger back bone and determination to see things through. In a normal working environment you just move on to the next project but for a freelancer it is a much bigger deal. Especially when your working two jobs and doing all the hours that you possibly can, exhausted all the time and trying to put your heart and soul into your work. Very inspirational video Holly and of course your testament to the idea of gritting your teeth and finding that strength inside to get back on with your artwork. I'm just about to move into freelance work from a steady job and this is due to landing my dream freelance opportunity. So i'm hoping that things will work out. Its always in the back of my mind though that there is the possibility that no matter how hard I work and how good the end product is there is the possibility that circumstances out of my control could bring it all crashing down. Anyway, it was great to watch your video/s and I will continue to do so as I find its a great help knowing that someone else has these same worries.

[@lualazarovic5556]

Thank you for sharing this very personal story of rejection. I have barely tried to become an illustrator at this point, so I don't have a story around this subject, but there are other areas in which my experience made me resonate with you. It's encouraging to see a success story coming out of such dark times. I sometimes wonder, though, how many there are out there, who got rejected time and time again and whose stories we don't hear because they are less successful or they simply don't share them. I will keep trying, though.

[@GwendolynNevarez]

Thank you for sharing your Illustrator story. I’m not pursuing anything freelance at the moment but sometimes I feel like I’m making art with no purpose. I create the work and then it just gets shoved into a drawer where no one can see. However, you have inspired me to reopen my old Etsy shop and start listing some prints again. It’s just really hard to know where to begin.

[@amyrimmer4455]

Thank you for sharing this Holly - and on a completely different note - you have a lovely gentle, soothing voice. Lovely to listen to!

[@paulakotecki2790]

Hi Holly, I’m sorry you had disappointments in the past, my daughter is currently at university studying fine art and she watches your channel because she sees you as an inspirational artist and personality, I’m sure you will go from strength to strength. Best wishes. 🤗😃

[@orkidbox]

Thanks for sharing. I love the Wool Week illustrations. I realise it is difficult but it would be great to see what the difference in quality of work is because I find it difficult to see all my own mistakes in something like watercolour.

[@Illustratoramanda]

Thanks for sharing this. I graduated in 2011 and still trying to be a freelance illustrator finding it a struggle but I will keep trying.

[@angeladatseri5254]

I am glad that you managed to get over that and be where you are now, because I find your work amazing. I am currently study illustration and didn't have anything more than some portrait commissions (which I love). During the summer, I had a commission of a portrait that I spent hours trying to make it work but I couldn't, so I cancelled it. Even though it was for a family member, it drop my confidence and I am now completely unsure if I should be open to commissions, even if it would really help me at the moment. So I can't imagine how it would be to get a response like that for a big brand, I even find emails, licences, copyrights and all these very intimidating. I hope that I will one day get over my fears like you did, I look forward seeing what your next video is going to be about. Best of wishes :)

[@Aquarellina]

HOLY crap that was a blow with the canceled project. I had a project be canceled lately because they realized they didn't want to do it at all. But hearing that your work is not good enough - they could have said that it wasn't a direction they wanted to go with and that's cool enough. I've had my client pay for the work that was done up to the point where they canceled - and they were fair and paid.

[@katjweiss]

Thank you for sharing such a painful story

[@forindet]

Thanks for sharing your story! I love hearing about other's journeys, especially when they came close to giving up, but persevered! So when my own journey gets hard I just tell myself it will make for a great story one day, even though it sucks going through it :)

[@shwampysama]

Thank you so much Holly for sharing this story!!! It mush have been hard to go back to those memories so I really appreciate it and think you are just wonderful and brave. You've always been very inspirational to me and your videos really lighten up my day! I've also felt that disappointment as an artist, but I've tried to turn that pain and sadness into motivation which is not an easy task. I look forward to the wonderful things you will create in the future! Much love and hugs! Ps. Quentin is just adorable, his snoring is just so cute! :)

[@sonjataljaardartist769]

Hi Holly thank you so much for sharing your story. You are such an inspiration. I really needed this encouragement. It is over a year now that I work so very hard and nothing happens. But I won't give up.

[@marisspot7677]

Holly if you want to have your art on homeware, you should consider art licensing. You get to keep all copyrights to your art, you're just renting companies to use your art on products like homeware and it'd serve as great exposure for you to boot!

[@nataliasalvadorart]

Thanks for sharing this story... I don't know if I would be able to recover just like you did... As you say, I would see it as a sign that maybe I'm not good enough for pursuing such a career. But after watching your video, I see how important is to believe in yourself and your dreams, and work hard to achieve them no matter how scared and hurt you may feel. So really, thank you, you're very inspiring.

[@dragonkattz]

Thanks for sharing a personal story. I'm certainly battling to try and stay in the illustration game right now, so this was helpful.

[@tundraillustration]

In my opinion there are 3 different kinds of illustrators. The professional ones which make a living exclusively or partially from art. I would subdivide these in the ones who work better or feel fullfilled as comission/work for hire artists and those who prefer selling products or do self publishing - either on the side or full time. In this last category a good example is Yeaaah Studio from France, who work in their own products and make a living off of it. Then the hobbyists who draw exclusively for pleasure and don't produce work regularly. Maybe some people might fall in between but the important is that all types of artists should be respected, because all work takes time and dedication.

[@natalieczer]

Thank you for sharing such a personal story! I know it's hard to look back on things like this but as someone who is trying to become a freelance illustrator, it's encouraging to hear that you can overcome such hurdles. I appreciate you sharing these really personal parts of your life with us!! :)

[@bethfriends]

It’s a rough world out there for artists! Thank you for sharing your inspirational story. It encourages me to keep working ❤️

[@melanieg8139]

I love your art and illustrations 😚😚😚

[@fathimasstudio]

Such a lovely video, Holly! Thanks for sharing such a personal, painful story. I think a lot of successful people don't often share their experiences of difficult times, and it makes their success feel more unattainable if it's something you're still aspiring to and still journeying towards, so your sharing this makes it seem more real and like it really is possible :)

[@Butterinyourear]

Wow, you must have been absolutely crushed over their reaction! I’m so glad you stuck it out and things picked up pretty quickly after that. Thank you for sharing this with us, I feel we can learn as much from failures as from successes but tend to just share the latter.

[@aza6241]

thank you! I always learn a lot from your love towards illustration.

[@jessicacarapella1870]

I'm so sorry that happened :( Though, I am so happy that things are looking up now!

[@andrearomero5414]

Thank you for sharing this story with us 😊 it is really inspiring to know that someone as talented as you have passed through this kind of situations. I'm pursuing the same dream and it has been difficult, I haven't got any illustration related job but I won't give up! ^-^' Greetings from Mexico, I really admire your work 💕 you're an awesome human being and artist 💕

[@h-aether]

Hi Holly, I just wanted to say I love your channel & you have inspired me to get back into illustrating after almost giving up myself - thankyou so so much! :)

[@nathalygrass5295]

Thanks for sharing! it really helped, having in mind the journey ahead

[@arielle_art]

Thank you for sharing this, it’s really inspired me not to give up. I really love your work, and your KZbin channel :)

[@GinaMaldonado_]

Thank you for sharing your experience Holly. It sounds very harsh to hear your work described as disappointing but I'm glad to know that you bounced back from that and that things got better after only 6 months. I've never had an experience like that but I have lots of unanswered submissions which I find very discouraging. I wish they at least would have an automatic reply acknowledging the submissions 😑

[@MS-fr2dm]

Thanks for sharing your story it’s very motivating. This only shows how strong you are 😘. I love your work and your videos. You are truly talented. As @Malamik Art said there is still hope for us over 40 too! I’m have recently quit my job as digital designer to start as a freelance illustrator and I’m know for sure that I will be disappointed at any moment, I also now that I just have to continue and not give up. Currently I’m working on my second commission and I got corrections to do on my illustration. I take the feedback from my customer gladly I know it will only make my work better. Do they tell me to make corrections with kindness.

[@alip9993]

Thanks so much for this! I am really benefiting from your videos! 😃😃😃

[@DrQuizzler]

Hi Holly!! I've been sort of binge-watching your videos. Your a wonderful artist, and a great vlogger!! This story touched a nerve. I'm glad you got to have the last laugh!! :) If I ever get around to trying to vlog, I have a "getting kicked out of two piano studios" story which might be similarly inspiring once I get my stuff going. Anyway, great stuff!! Thanks for sharing so much of your journey in here. :)

[@melocotonki]

Thank you for a lovely video (as always) Holly, I've had very similar situations, and I think the hardest for me has been picking myself up and having something similar happen after I thought I had learned from my past experiences. Thankfully I haven't given up yet! But I think legal stuff and being too trusting with clients have been the two things that have hurt me quite a few times!

[@Francesca-pl8jn]

Thanks for the encouragement! 💖

[@romaniacc]

Holly as always your videos inspire me to keep going! Thank you for sharing your experience and not giving up because now you are here inspiring me 💙🤲🏻

[@patricia7149]

One of my favorite videos. Thanks for sharing your journey.

[@laurenfitton2848]

Thank you for sharing that story, it's really encouraging to see how far you've come! It'd be great to know how you got your first few jobs, did they find you or did you send them your work? I'm thinking of sending out copies of my work to various magazines etc but I'm unsure what format these are meant to take, thanks again for making such lovely videos xx

[@howlingsuns]

I'd also really really like to hear about this! (: I'm trying to get my freelance career started, too, but I really don't know how to find/approach clients. Also, Good Luck to you Lauren!

[@georgemonje5997]

This was so inspiring! You’ve really pushed through and for good reason your work is breathtaking :)

[@Breakfst4dinner]

This is exactly what I needed to hear, thank you Holly :)!

[@DashaHorb]

Thank you so much for this video Holly! Right in time for me because I have a lot of doubts about my illustration work now

[@palestblue]

Thank you so much, an encouraging and wonderful video as always

[@N1MHLING]

Thank you for sharing your stoy, Holly! And I'm very sad to hear your early carreer opportunity experience was a negative one. I think it's very strong you got over it and succeeded anyway! A lesser person might have been completely discouraged (*cough* me, probably). This might be a hard question, but looking back on the pieces you did for that one company how do you feel about them? Because looking at the sheep shortly after, it's so much in line with all your beautiful work. It feels like the company praised your portfolio and style and then expected something completely different.. And I've gotten commissions/requests completely out of line with my style too, which I thought was very odd. (Like my style is stylized, fantasy-ish girl illustrations and was commissioned to draw a realistic graphite baby oO ).

[@ghostroseart]

How was your experience in school? I'm in my final year at a university (majoring in art) and my teacher has never liked my work. He grades fairly but he doesn't like my style. Half way during the semester he made me start my project all over....I had to do 8 weeks worth of work in a weekend. I had hoped college would be a safe place where I could grow as an artist, but instead I just have three year's worth of bad stories about this particular professor! I still love creating work and I always want to do it...I just don't know how to face the profession when my instructor has made me feel so inadequate. Thank you for sharing your story!! I appreciate the inspiration to keep going...especially when it's something you love so much.

[@ejclearwater]

Such a beautiful story. I know that feeling and it sucks but i guess you learn to grow a thick skin. Im so glad you never gave up! You're such a big inspiration to me 😘

[@KenLives333]

You may or not have heard of it, but it's a great hub-school-you tube channel for illustrators of all sorts: Bobby Chiu and Schoolism. I can't recommend it enough. Good luck with all.

[@linday2009]

I am not an illustrator but, I am a nurse and we will always find ppl trying to make us feel miserable with our work on our journey. I have learned so much from mistakes and disappointments that all I do is to let then go and ignore toxic people comments. Maybe is not you, it is them ;).

[@paulgibbons2320]

I left college in 2000 as a fully qualified HND in Illustration for advertising. But my work had tailed off in the second year. Felt I'd lost interest an I was not happy with my end of year folio. So I jacked it. After three years of GNVQ Art and design and two years of HND level illustration I just did not follow up on it. Left wondering what might have been if I kicked myself up the arse and put a better folio together. Reality is. I was not upto scratch in my final year. An I knew it. Who knows what might have been ? Chances are the financial crash would probably ended and career I'd built.

[@emilyharris1989]

You go girl! Your work is ace - I would buy your homeware. Look at them sheep!! Daww

[@aminahouha]

I m happy coz you didn't give up 💟💟

[@charlotte9247]

Im graduating from illustration in June time and terrifyed about how i should be tackling the industry haha. I know its gonna be hard but being an illustrator has been a lifelong dream of mine

[@satsmart]

im 13 and i want to be an illustrator , this story inspires me

[@tashedwards99]

Thank you for making this video, it is inspiring and it really helps

[@Edmundostudios]

I’ve actually graduated this year in illustration. I’m not really a traditional illustrator a mix of a design background as well. I do some freelance projects every now and again but my focus has been on design jobs and I am getting lots of interviews which is nice but no offers so far. I don’t feel discouraged if anything it drives me as my current day job is boring life out of me lol Whatever happens I will always be passionate about creation, design and visual narrative.

[@Clo4Choccy]

Edmundo studios OMG Ed! I did not expect to see you here! Can’t believe you watch Holly’s videos too. This one’s relevant but kind of reassuring right?

[@Edmundostudios]

Chloe Elise Surprise :) Yeah for sure, it’s always good to hear how stories play out from experience traditional or otherwise, everyone has a different story. I’m pretty lucky to be very self motivated which helps maintain confidence. Also Learning quite a lot about how different industry practice is transitioning from an education background. There are a lot of skills on the business/sales side which really help. Anyway hope everything is going well with you and comics? I’m in London quite often these days so may see you around!

[@The_Captain40k]

Really inspiring, I’m in the midst of trying to change career and it’s tough! My question is how did you make the leap from full time at the restaurant? You mentioned you couldn’t complete the project to a high standard while having a full time job, but needed the job to pay the bills. It seems like a bit of a catch-22.

[@ashlingspoof]

I've been going through this for the past 3 months and it's hard. I know I have things to improve and learn in my work, and it's especially hard finding jobs in illustration, on a confidence level. Maybe I need to have more patience.

[@hollyexley]

Oriana be kind to yourself too! It takes time and it’s different for everyone 💙

[@ashlingspoof]

Thanks for the reminder, Holly. Actually I keep forgetting about this aspect :)

[@Kimmiekawa]

What a compelling story, so glad you continued your art journey! I would love if you shared more personal experiences like this!

[@hollyexley]

Glad you enjoyed! I forgot to say in this video - I was given a "kill fee" by the client - which is basically a payment for my time working on the project. Always make sure there's a kill fee mentioned in your contract! I'd be happy to make more videos on this in the future.

[@Kimmiekawa]

holly exley okay thank god you had that! Looking forward to that ✨😊

[@fijaystudio]

You need to keep an eye on that brand, in case they go through their samples and use your art today or in the future without credit or payment to you. Seriously.

[@aubreyb8575]

This comment might come off as sounding arrogant but here I go lol. One reason I'm afraid to step into the illustration world is because I do not know what it's like to receive negative feedback on my work. Again, I know how that sounds. Growing up, I was in a family of 2 other artists being my mother and brother. My grandmother was also an amazing artist but she stopped long before I was born. But my mother and brother never pursued it. Being the youngest of that group of artists, I knew I wanted to make something of it and they really supported me. My brother would critique me, and my mom would give me some advice here and there but never anything truly negative. In fact, now that we're older, my brother told me that he would say those things because he was jealous that his younger sister was more advanced than him. Not that it was ever a contest but there was a little sibling rivalry there lol. And now, seeing as both my mother and brother stopped doing art, I have progressed much further and my mother tells me that I have "surpassed" all the other artists in the family. So theres definitely nothing but positivity with my family. Then when I was in school, I was the class artist. I was always praised for my work by classmates and teachers, especially my art teachers. I won "artist of the year" which is an award given to seniors of each school district. However, I went to school in a very small town where I was one of the only artists amongst my classmates. So obviously I didnt have much competition and there was never any negativity there either. After high school, a lot of things in my life fell apart that I wont get into. But basically everything from family life, social life, my health, etc. was in complete shambles. I'm 23 now, and I have spent the last 6 years healing myself. And in that time, I didnt work on my art as much because of how bad my mental state was. It's been about year since I got back into art and I've progressed rapidly. I want a career in illustration more than anything, but theres that one obstacle in the back of my mind. Will people outside of my circle like my work? I dont get a whole lot of attention on my socials or anything, so it cant be all that great. I'm still working really hardly and developing my style further but that thought is still holding me back. Also, because I was out of art scene for so long, I never went to school for it like I planned. I worked a crappy grocery store job for 4 years, and now I'm at a manufacturing plant assembling car parts because I never acquired any other skills. I've sort of been on my own since I graduated due to all the family issues that occurred, so I've only focused on struggling to support myself with the little means I had. I grew up too quick, and now I'm actually on my own with my boyfriend in a house we own together. And I'm lost. I have no money for school, I cant afford to invest more into my art, nor can I afford to take on less hours at work. I cant find a higher paying job without an education of some kind, yet I cant afford an education. Not even a class or 2, I just cant swing it. Im stuck in this cycle and my mental state is definitely suffering and its causing tension in our home. I also feel that theres far less need for creativity where I live (U.S., Connecticut) and a lot less opportunities for me here, and I cant afford to leave. Money and doubt, they're my enemies right now. If there's anyone reading this, and you're someone who has overcome similar struggles, I'd really love to speak with you.

[@margotlth3371]

My first client ever on freelance illustration never paid me. I was just starting so I havn't enought money to call them in justice. I lost a lot of time ( 3 months of work for them ) and a lot of money. I feel bad again today, I hope that I'm the only young Illustrator that they trick but ... I don't think so.