I realized I was emotionally unavailable watching a Kim K interview...

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[@BreenyLee]

Don’t miss the message, thinking it’s about Kim K, it’s not, it’s about YOU…and me 🙂 HIT THE LIKE BUTTON ❤️

[@tammyarmstrong6387]

Bible verses

[@mangcobo_blackrose]

Hello Queen Love and Light✨ I admire your authenticity. You are literally more like my big sis. May the Lord continue to Bless you with even more wisdom, we are here for it!❤

[@tabisamvinjelwa4505]

00000

[@tabisamvinjelwa4505]

​@Sindiswa Thembelihle

[@goldenxkenny]

"You're too pretty to be this crazy" is what my internal thoughts have been telling me. I should not be chasing after men who can't see my worth. I should be rejecting them

[@angelbabygirlxoxo]

this.

[@chania80]

I laughed so hard but it also spoke to me - loudly!! Facts!

[@naledidavies]

!!!

[@NadiaPink]

Amen ❤

[@CrystalDatingCoach]

EXACTLY! Stop. You deserve to be Adored!

[@CM-yo9jk]

Nah, I think she handles herself well. She just doesn't want us to watch her being vulnerable, she will save that for her close family. Her vulnerabilities are not for our entertainment.

[@Fatima-kp8hi]

Agreed. Evil ppl sense that vulnerability and they attack. Weakness isn’t to be shown period.

[@phizzy123]

@@Fatima-kp8hi vulnerability isn’t weakness. that is literally the whole point of the video. if you’re a slave to what people think about you if they see you vulnerable then they own you.

[@true4585]

@@phizzy123 That’s sounds lovely, but she’s 100% right. Yes we know vulnerability it’s not a weakness, but the reality is evil people sense that and attack. Or regular people respect you less, because they start to view you “less than” what they initially thought of you. People tend to want to look up to people, not across or down. They just do. Observe. You just have to know who to be vulnerable around. So I don’t blame Kim K, for example, for not be vulnerable for the MEDIA. It’s actually wise.

[@sunvavachi]

@@phizzy123 it's not a weakness but I feel if you're 24/7 in media you have to protect that to only close people.

[@phunmyjan]

@@phizzy123 it's not a weakness and it's definitely not something you show to the world. It's meant for your loved ones in close doors. Do not be deceived by people out there because the same person will tell you "aww so sorry" yet bad mouth you behind.

[@marilynking527]

Being emotionally unavailable can show up in friendships and everywhere else in your life

[@nikigracevlogs]

💯

[@amy-leescott6061]

That’s true.

[@pemfimrs1419]

So so true

[@rsamuels6969]

What you are describing is Fearful avoidant attachment style . The emotional unavailability but wanting the relationship. It usually stems from trauma around relationships. I highly recommend the Personal Development school to learn how to overcome this! It’s really great

[@lesley5380]

Thanks I will check them out.

[@shesgotit6201]

Thank you for the channel recommendation.

[@khomotso87]

I joined the school.

[@di7787]

Oh yes, that's me 1000% , exactly what I thought when she mentioned that emotionally available partners scare us

[@rsamuels6969]

@@khomotso87 excited for you. It literally changed my life and all my relationships

[@AISHALVSMJ]

This is why I think Kim doesn't want a therapist - the same way you don't want one that knows you - she's probably experienced so much of people trying to use her that she doesn't trust anyone anymore. So although it is a shame, I do understand why she is the way she is.

[@AISHALVSMJ]

Emotional availability is something I definitely need to work on though so thank you for this reminder 🙏❤️

[@nikigracevlogs]

It’s definitely a possibility 💯

[@joanna48162]

You don't have to show your face to your therapist. And she could at least try. She doesn't have to talk about everything, just to have someone she can talk to if she wants to.

[@rizuejigu7402]

Ways of a narcissist

[@catcat9582]

Isn't she the one who used everyone else? Other than her mother exploiting her?

[@HotHoneyAndSpice]

Also, you can become emotionally unavailable in friendships too. Made to hide your feelings because your friends don’t know how to have honest conversations. I had so many instances where I had to hide my true feelings because I would be judged or lose friends. That dynamic can bleed into your other relationships as well. The last guy I dated was emotionally available and I was not. He was so sweet and put in effort but I was incredibly distrusting and guarded. He comes to mind often, not because I want him back (although that would be nice😊) but I guess as a reminder to keep working on becoming emotionally available so I don’t miss out on anyone amazing.

[@msatutude17]

I understand that completely. I recently kist a friend because she basically didn't keep her word about helping me, and I just expressed how hurt I was. That is literally all I did. 8 still wanted the friendship, but sh ended it bc she felt I should've just been ok with her mistake and not talk thru it. I.dont get it

[@hg3895]

30:24 yup that's me, I left him in Feb last year. Its absolutely horrible being close to someone and never knowing who they really even were. I was open and authentic, he couldn't handle it. He was insecure, unhealthy, paranoid and cold. And since the break up the Lord has helped me become the happiest I ever have been. Emotionally unavailable people can destroy your self esteem, please see the red flags and don't date them. I became emotionally unavailable after the break up but I was very aware of it and chose to purposefully distance from men until I recovered. I didn't wanna hurt anyone :)

[@princizzraven2000]

I relate, it’s like you become dull and the happy energy is drained out of you. I’m glad you’re recovered.

[@kflecha1]

We all at some point get emotionally unavailable specially when we are living in a society where people doesn’t seem to be emotionally available anymore unfortunately 🥺

[@BreenyLee]

I’ve learned that you can be emotionally available whilst still protecting yourself, your boundaries control who has access to you 🤍

[@alexislamberson1901]

I’m crying 😭 literally crying!! It’s me! I am emotionally unavailable 😢 this makes sense. Especially around other females too. My guard is so high up and God knows I AM TRYING to heal and loosen up 😢 this video was right on time and so crazy how lately I’ve been obsessed with trying to work on myself and emotions this comes up! Thank you ❤

[@esmeegloria]

I've always worked on myself, but the past year taught me the hard way about what happens when you don't acknowledge and show your emotions not only to others, but to yourself.. I have been kinda amazed about how I unconsciously used to be so on standoffish, and how I would harden my body, facial expressions etc to make extremely clear that YOU.SHOULD.NOT.COME.CLOSE. I've always known deep inside that I have so much beauty inside me, but honestly.. I feel like I have just been so besides myself for my whole life up until now that I just do not know how to make my authentic self and feelings the center of my being and get all that beauty to show through.. (I know that sounds weird but it's true) I really try to soften myself and show my emotions more and I immediately notice that the responses of people around me changes, not because they were never willing to, but I never let them in.. but I know that I still only show the tip of the ice berg.. I really want to transform that.. Thank you for being so open I feel you! much love

[@saffwa.]

i can relate to this a lot. i didn’t know that i was emotionally unavailable, i was so confused about myself and i got scolded by mom bc of my “okay” behaviour with everyone. & im still confused lmao

[@sopeodusami9250]

This is basically what I realised a few months ago. I started to be more open and less anxious and that be friendlier and it has helped a lot.

[@chisomezeh6393]

literally been watching you since I was 15, now 19 thanks for the advice and guidance your like an internet big sister.

[@KpTheG]

Breenyyyyyy! How do you always know what to say and WHEN to say it? I swear it’s like you speak directly to every phase I am in my life. The more I peel back the layers, the more I grow as a person and the more I require in regards to love! Self love and otherwise! Much Love Breeny & Friends ❤

[@Joy_LaFaye]

Giiirl saaame!!! 😂🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@geordinefasiki3745]

EVERY-TIME I TELL YOU GURL !!

[@ImaniShola]

We absolutely attract reflections of ourselves. Low self-esteem attracts low self-esteem e.g. narcissists and codependents. Both have low self esteem but it plays out differently. Absolutely common but yes, not healthy, and healing works. Highly recommend people look into inner-child healing, attachment styles, and father-wound healing. 💖Big love to all of us on our journeys.

[@kammiwhyte4501]

What about mother would healing no talks about that and that’s extremely unfair and messed up smh

[@cesst2486]

Being emotionally unavailable is usually so deep rooted in trauma! and overcoming it is not easy and it takes time , i’ve been through it and it took a couple years for me for it to really hit home… and for me to become emotionally available. that was cause i’d worked so hard on myself, self worth , finding out who i am… it’s not as easy as just being more vulnerable our minds are so strong and our hearts stronger we have to learn to feel safe within ourselves and love ourselves and know our self worth to really become authentic and start to attract the right ones . Life will also throw tests along the way to see your progress… if you can do therapy please do it! , watch and listen to professional psychologist to really understand this topic. Wish all luck in your journeys to freedom from trauma finding your authentic self!!! please take non professionals opinions with a pinch of salt! including my own…

[@rsamuels6969]

Agreed 10000% have to work on all the things you mentioned including healing the trauma to overcome this

[@kardrey100]

Years ago I read an article where she explained why they talk slow! Her and her sisters. She said when they were kids her mom never rushed them to talk, so they learned to take their time talking no matter who gets impatient. They just talk slower! Lol

[@BreenyLee]

I love that 😂 I speak so fast so I cannot relate!!! Haha

[@nikigracevlogs]

How interesting 😅

[@Fatima-kp8hi]

Hmmm. I don’t necessarily agree. The truth is, the world isn’t sunshine, butterflies and bubblegum. The sad truth that being emotionally available is DANGEROUS. This is why women are so easily manipulated and all feeling and hurt deeply. Deep emotion feelings is the easiest way to become a victim. Sorry not sorry. I’m a realist.

[@DeBellanadi]

I agree but I think the key is knowing the world will make you like that then making changes to heal yourself from the reality of the world

[@Juliaa__T]

Wow Breeny you made me seriously self reflect. I’ve been the emotionally unavailable one. When guys try to be emotional available to me and asking me to be vulnerable with my feelings I start to get angry and shut down.

[@anjoulie7196]

I didn`t even finish watching this but the first few minutes already told me, that she is speaking facts. Facts everybody needs to hear. Plus she has gorgeous hair! Really beautiful

[@livingthedream444]

You are just rumbling Life is not One Size fits All! 😂

[@nnelson4557]

This is spot on. God put on my heart about a year before I met my husband that I needed to work on my emotional availability. I got that word not even connected to getting a husband, but just being a part of my own healing. As a result of doing at work, when I eventually did meet my husband, his emotional availability was so refreshing, and we connected by both being vulnerable together. The healing is necessary both for future coupling and also for just being yourself in a healthy place.

[@ashley_audacious]

what did you do to become emotionally available?

[@hayleyb467]

how did it work?

[@girlinthecity2304]

Yeah what work did you do? 😛😛😛

[@nnelson4557]

​ @prettywhnpashley therapy, intense bible study. focusing on the fact that God created us to connect with other people, but in a healthy way. I also had to unpack a lot of the cultural things I learned. I came from a background of a lot of unmarried/single mothers in my family and their advice was always about how to protect yourself. But there is beauty in vulnerability. And if i'm vulnerable (while still having boundaries and not dumping all over people) and people mistreat me, the issue isn't the vulnerability, it's them. all of that really helped.

[@nnelson4557]

@@girlinthecity2304 ​therapy, intense bible study. focusing on the fact that God created us to connect with other people, but in a healthy way. I also had to unpack a lot of the cultural things I learned. I came from a background of a lot of unmarried/single mothers in my family and their advice was always about how to protect yourself. But there is beauty in vulnerability. And if i'm vulnerable (while still having boundaries and not dumping all over people) and people mistreat me, the issue isn't the vulnerability, it's them. all of that really helped.

[@tatianabaio541]

This one hit home really quick. The past few months I also realised that I am emotional unavailable and as you said it takes a good amount of rationality and strength to admit it. I hope I can meet the right person when I become emotionally available as I’m doing what I can to sort my ‘issues’ out. So to all ladies who are going through it, I’m praying you can get healed and see how amazing and beautiful you are just by being yourselves. Thank you Breeny ❤

[@morena6371]

Girl, childhood traumas made us that way lol. We are ‘cold’ but that’s okay, we should give ourselves a break. Ofc it has some side effects but a lot of benefits. Therapy is not going to fix this unfortunately you have to do it yourself. And this western society thinks everything is a red flag. It doesn’t mean we’re bad people, we have the biggest hearts but it’s just takes time. My man warmed me up and it was not easy lol it will always work out with the right one. Never think you’re ‘crazy’. You’re just human.

[@LisaLee123]

I feel this. I find myself being the same way even though I desire marriage. I feel the wall. I just feel scared to open my heart to someone after an abusive relationship… it’s been 3+ years.

[@naomicampana]

Whew. Been 2.5 years. Sending lurve

[@martaa5998]

Same here. 4 years.

[@notsurewhat2put]

Same

[@princizzraven2000]

The beginning preview gave me my aha moment! Literally I feel like I came out of this season and I see such a difference; from the rigidity and everything. When you’re emotionally available you simply state how you feel and you can easily state why you feel that way without any need for validation or acceptance of your feelings. You’re simply free flowing, open, and lighter. This transparency alone is healing, to help open our eyes. Thank you Breeny!

[@opalvibration]

People, we’re not perfect. Stop picking apart yourself as far as how you relate as a human being. If a person (dream partner) fxcks with you - trust they will see past your faults. Yall be safe out there. Focus on your journey, the universe always brings the right connection to you ❤ The idea of “being emotionally unavailability” makes no sense. We have relationships built on emotional currency, people just don’t know themselves, know how to communicate, listen and over complicate the very basic essence of being human - relating. We all relate on diff levels. Yall please read & apply 7 HABITS of HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE - and you’ll be fine.

[@Think-see]

I'll admit that this past year I discovered that I was emotionally unavailable. That combined with attempting to entertain an unhealthy connection really ran me into the ground and wrecked emotionally/ physically.

[@notsurewhat2put]

Yeah same. I died and I’m just now coming back to life.

[@buttafly300]

Realizing that I was emotionally unavailable in my last relationship was the hardest pill to swallow. That relationship wrecked me and I am still healing from the trauma it caused but it opened my eyes to the much needed healing. I never want to feel that pain again. Everything you describe about the emotionally unavailable woman resonated with me. I was the poster child for this. It took me becoming a mother and ending a toxic relationship to understand that I needed to heal so I wouldn't pass the same trauma onto my daughter. In the past year I've been more emotionally available than I have my entire life. Therapy is a great place to start you won't regret it. Thank you for sharing this video it's going to help a lot of people ❤❤❤

[@jemimajanvier4706]

Breeny, I notice how sensitive you’ve become over the years, especially to yourself. It’s very beautiful to see ❤

[@clovalehr9385]

Girl your speaking directly to me! The strong one in every situation; the one everyone takes for granted that I’ll always pick up the pieces for everyone else. I’ve stopped feeling.

[@tianahercules824]

Definitely resonated with me. For the past several years since my divorce; I have been a stone as far as my emotions go. Going through the motions with men and not really revealing my true self. It became way too heavy towards the middle of this past year and this year I promised myself to be more present, and process my emotions and be more open. With my friends, children and any man I decide to date. Trusting myself and honoring my feelings is a big part of this journey as is journaling. This was a good video. Thanks for sharing and being more open. I have seen your growth over the past several years and a lot of women can identify with this. Also wanted to ask where your outfit is from in this video. It is super cute. 🥰

[@JOI.with.an.i]

I was asking myself out of frustration one day why I attract emotional unavailable men, and it dawn on me that I was myself, and I realized it was a defense mechanism. I do want to change but I really don’t know how too. It’s become part of me. I’m so glad that you decided to post this at this time.

[@rosemarymartinez6709]

I appreciate your vulnerability in this video. I’m proud of you for developing that self awareness. It takes time and comes in layers. I found myself in this place recently. I have been in therapy for 4 years now. I was in a relationship for almost 3 years recently and it was definitely a trauma bond. So I started therapy right before getting into that relationship which helped me learn about attachment styles, resolving conflicts, being more vulnerable, etc.. It was a blessing to know what was going on but a struggle because he wasn’t in therapy and wasn’t receptive to the new strategies I was trying to implement or learning from my new vulnerability and accountability. So that left me stagnant in my “emotion maturity” growth because I seen no resolution. That lead me to blame him and I became hyper focused on how emotionally unavailable HE was and all the things he was doing wrong. We split up because he didn’t want to “do the work” and go to couples therapy or seek his own therapy. I just couldn’t be with someone who didn’t want to grow emotionally since I’m working hard on doing the work myself. But coming out of that relationship I decided that I needed a break from dating/sex/talking/texting to focus on myself and bettering myself so I won’t end up in that situation again because it’s been pattern. After just a month of no contact with my ex, no social media (posting pics for attention), no reaching out to old lovers, no dating, no getting numbers, etc, I’ve realized that I was so emotionally unavailable for MANY years. I started seeing all the things I did to get validation from the opposite sex but never was truly vulnerable and never really looking to have a genuine connection I just wanted someone to make me “feel good.” I wanted someone to make me feel loved because I clearly didn’t love myself. It was another layer of self awareness that I unlocked and now can’t unsee. I thought that just because I took care of my appearance and always looked good or ate right, worked out, cared about my house etc, that I loved myself. But that is further than the truth! It takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable and emotionally mature and available. I feel like 85% of people don’t have the self awareness to see it and just blame the other person. You get what you DESERVE. If you entertain emotionally unavailable men it’s because you ARE ASWELL. If you find yourself in that situation that you notice your partner is emotionally unavailable then that is a sign to take a look within. Take a break from dating and start learning/loving yourself more. It’s a journey.

[@RaeRaeDaGr81]

Whewwww I need to do what you did. I’m loving the skinny Barbie doll look

[@Model_Roe]

She's a real life Black Barbie

[@AA-yc9dq]

@@Model_Roe literally!!

[@AllThingsTiffanyTV]

I can honestly say the last two men o dated were emotionally available and they both were in therapy. So there are people trying to work through it. I’ve tried to be cold and shut off but i always end up breaking down with emotion.

[@awaaa4767]

Hi Breeny! I find it difficult to put my guard down because most men I meet put no energy into the relationship and expect me to be super caring and happy around them when they are cold and dismissive. I do not want to be a cold person but it feels vain and discouraging to give effort with people like that.

[@BreenyLee]

Then don't give them your effort :) they don't deserve it, you have to be picky about who you let your guard down to x

[@girlsclub6698]

Thank you so much breeny, imagine how many women are going through this with no one too relate too or talk too and you just come and shine your light You’re truly a gem, Grateful for you!

[@BreenyLee]

❤️

[@narimana.838]

oh my god! Listening to you made me realize a habit of mine that I wasn't aware of. I had a flashback of how I was 12 years ago and what made me shut down my emotions. You gave me shivers as I could sooo much relate to what you mentioned. Especially when you mentioned getting ourselves absorbed by temporary pleasures to seal the pain away and not face it. I realize now why I was surrounded with emotionally unavailable people and I became one as a result of it, thus attracted the same energy with the new people I met. I can't thank you enough for this!! As someone who is working onto defining a new me, I believe this was God's away to show me that it is time to also work on being vulnerable and processing my emotions instead of running away from it. Since I was 17, I took an oath to change how I view the world and how I treat myself. There is no better way to create a better environment than starting with ourselves first. I stand proudly today to say I've become a very positive, cheerful, hopeful, passionate and ambitious 26 years old female. When we respect, value, and honor our truth, we create an extraordinary life that is more than what we desired to manifest. I finish my comment with gratitude. I am grateful to Allah, to you, and to me who continuously look for ways to grow out of old habits and mindsets that do not serve me no more. May God guide us to the ultimate truth, and to be better humans that leave a legacy that is worth mentioning and that is heartwarming to the people we leave to continue living on this earth.

[@tmuun]

thank you for this comment! i resonate with you

[@DOE.T]

I feel this is for every type of relationship for me (Work relationship, community, friends and family). Thank you Breeny for speaking on this topic and helping me realize this about myself during my healing journey.

[@chidinwabueze]

I think I’m emotionally unavailable too😭. I think that may be why I end up feeling neglected in my relationships

[@sierradenise76]

This video made me cry. Breezy, thank you so much for talking about this. I’ve been emotionally unavailable since I was a child and many people have complimented my calmness and strength but deep down it’s a defense mechanism. I’ve learned that remaining calm in chaos is actually me shutting down emotionally. I’m healing in this area and learning how to acknowledge how I feel and voice my feelings more often. But I’m also learning that I can’t be vulnerable with everyone. It takes another emotionally available person to receive my emotions well in my vulnerable moments.

[@angel.umuhoza]

your vulnerability is helping a lot of us heal. Thank you!!!

[@tequilachanel7312]

Everybody trying to date broken and unhealed thinking they can jump from person to person to make them feel better be honest with yourself and enjoy your own company for a while. If you can’t stand being alone who will enjoy your company?

[@chania80]

Breeny this was so good. On point! I recently dealt with an avoidant and it really affected me badly. They are extremely unavailable. I do have signs of emotional unavailability too but acknowledge that a person I dealt with last year helped me heal a little. He was secure and let me tell you those people love amazingly. I am striving to shift to a more secure attachment style as well as working on healing to enhance my emotional availability.

[@CrystalDatingCoach]

You Deserve a Partner who ADORES you. Never hoping you'll see them or waiting for a Call!! If he's not making you feel like his PRIORITY. End it...someone will! Don't Force anything.

[@tokstalks]

I had to come to this conclusion recently and it shattered my ego. I had a very traumatic breakup a few years ago and I thought forgiveness meant I had healed, until I noticed the type of men I was attracted to(tragic lol). I'm taking a break from dating until I feel faithful enough in the possibility of the type of love that I can be whole in. I'm learning that if I say I want something, I need to prepare for it, believe it's possible, and feel worthy or receiving it. This period is my active waiting period while I prepare for everything I want and deserve. Thank you for always being candid and making this space for us woman be unashamed

[@lucygakaria8066]

It's so weird I could relate to everything you said in this video, my emotional unavailability also stems from my childhood it's really deep. I really don't know how to process my emotions I never learned to do so as a child, and I have always struggled with vulnerability. I avoid any scenario which would make me be vulnerable. I had to write this comment and post before I changed my mind, but am trying to embrace therapy taking it one step at a time.

[@rebecca5896]

side note : your make up Breeny it’s STUNNING!! 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩 this whole look ate left no crumbs

[@jessicacruz2012]

This video is 1000% true. I thinks it’s very important that Breeny mentions that’s emotionally unavailability doesn’t only stem from romantic but also from childhood traumas. It’s extremely important to heal and focus on self love. Vulnerability is strength. So when the right person comes along, we aren’t self destructive. ❤

[@TheCoffeeCat]

The worst thing is when your emotional unavailability is internal - you're warm when you're out with people, you react emotionally (when the emotion is a good feeling one at least), you can even empathize, be a good listener, be sad for a friend who's sad etc. BUT you yourself haven't cried in ages. You can't express anger because you immediately repress yourself. You can't deal with other people's anger either. People crying make you uncomfortable as if you had to do something. When people offer you help or comfort, you can even show gratitude but feel like you don't really need it, so you don't receive it. I've discovered I'm like this really late in life - it can almost go by unnoticed.

[@MO-ss5mj]

Dismissive avoidant?

[@TheCoffeeCat]

@@MO-ss5mj I'm actually anxious preoccupied in relationships. Anxious preoccupied are emotionally unavailable too, but towards themselves, not so much towards others.

[@watchmeglow6095]

Needed this! I recently accepted the fact that I am definitely emotionally available it's kinda daunting to unpack but I'm willing to do the work!!💪 I really want to be able to receive and reciprocate in beautiful relationships with the people I have in my life and MYSELF .. This was so good ! Thanks for the video ❤

[@havillandwilson1752]

Thank you for your vulnerability. I’ve rewatched this video twice already, and I see so much of myself in the things you are saying. Feeling emotionally numb is like living in a self inflicted prison, because you never truly feel seen or loved by anyone around you. This video is life changing

[@displaced_wanderer]

Thank you for being so sensitive and transparent. This video resonates with me so much; it opened my eyes to my own responsibility in the dynamic i'm trying to leave behind. And wow, do I have work to do! :)

[@Tulipswellness]

you have no idea how much I have changed and grown since I started following you this last summer, thank you so much for this amazing content, your videos just touch the spot every time, please know that you are inspiring and saving a lot of hearts here ❤❤❤❤❤

[@geetadwarka]

I need to go to therapy, I freeze when i need to open up to someone. I find it easy to hear people out than to tell about myself. it's sure a truama response. I'm attracted to unavaible men, I pick them on purpose to not get hurt and rejected by them. it's a sick unhealthy cycle. I' ve a anxious attachement style. I want connection, safty, joy and security. I can be clingy. In the past I needed a lot of reasurrance. I didnt shed all layers. I'm working on my healing. So i'll not attract unhealthy people, ou attract what you fear and what you are.

[@reannamora]

Whew that last part. Hugging my inner child crying herself to sleep ❤️

[@JoskaTheTrend]

The reason we're scammed so much online is we look for authentic clues and find them in actors(scammers who know how to act right). You can't tell authenticity anymore

[@GraceRuth]

This video is timely, thank you Breeny. The whole of last month I was healing and changing the parts of me that made me emotionally unavailable & caused avoidance attachment. I am now in a happy place.💜

[@racheluk87]

Setting myself free in 2023 ✨️

[@fayalyunania]

You should have MORE than a million subscribers!! Your talks are GOLD for both men and women!

[@Jahnely]

I just deleted my bumble last night because I realized I was emotionally unavailable. I've been on dating apps for years and still single. Lol

[@adose_of_Tequila]

I can definitely relate to breeny @ 11:29 . I opened myself up so freely to a guy who was EUA and wasn’t ready (although he pretended to be) ready for me, now dating after him sucks because I’m so closed off and it hurts because I don’t want to be this way and I’m always in my head about it. Even if a guy is treating me nicely and catering to me I find myself rejecting it.

[@notsurewhat2put]

Same like why are you so nice???? Making me suspicious

[@hamsat1210]

When you talking i felt like it’s a sign for me to be more aware , and to be honest at some level i’m emotionally unavailable

[@certifiedmuhiki]

It's interesting how am an emotional person yet am emotionally unavailable

[@PassionsForHer]

It’s funny how throughout this video I was having a fight with myself internally because I know that I’m not emotionally available but some of the things you mentioned resonated with me and I do attract emotionally unavailable men. I then realized that I’m not emotionally unavailable with men but I am in my relationship with GOD! Such a huge lightbulb moment. I don’t ask for what I really need, I don’t tell him when I feel dissatisfied or disappointed, I just try so hard to be perfect and do everything right and pretend to have faith. I try so hard to be in control of myself around him and it’s exhausting

[@ivanabutler6213]

I love this comment and I completely understand! Remember that God knows you better than you know yourself so you may think that you are “putting up a front for God” but he already knows sis so there’s no point! 😭 Just let you guard down, be completely honest with him and let him take care of you. He will sustain you and He wants you to cast your cares on Him for he cares for you. ❤

[@yannapositive]

I feel the comment about us dating unavailable men when we ourselves are unavailable. Tbh I've done that before, gravitated towards men who couldn't commit because at least I knew from the get go, than believing it's all good when it's not. We got work to do!

[@verchu10]

Big hug- it's great to see you taking another's experience and reflecting on your own journey, and throughout clearly embrace the whole process with love. It's so great to see you share your own healing journey and not make it as if you're an expert in it all. Personally, I realise the path to being open emotionally again is : 1) work on your self-love 2) learn to read/ understand people especially their intentions (actions speak louder than words)- that way you trust yourself fully on allowing only the right energy into your life Healthy emotional availability is about knowing with who you can be open with and who you don't xxx

[@NattyByNature-]

What a beautiful woman. she literally looks gorgeous. Her skin tone, her facial features. Literally stunning and to add she is also intellectually stimulating and has a commanding personality.

[@alkelangaspard]

Imagine my shock when I’ve been emotionally unavailable for most of my life, and then realising last year that I’m actually a “Highly Sensitive Person”. 😳😩 Lol it was tough to accept. But thanks for this because I never got the words for why people always thought I gave off a stand-off-ish attitude. And I get that SO much. I actually ruined a 7 year friendship with my best friend like this. And it’s been a journey. Strangely though, I’m actually not really that way with romantic relationships, but more so with friendships and work relationships. (I know that people often think that you don’t need to be emotionally available at work, but I value connection with people and have managed to create some lasting friendships from some of those, so I think it’s important that I show up as my true self always, rather than constantly putting up that facade to protect myself. ) I realise that I experienced a lot of hurt as a child- expressing myself and constantly being rejected or shut down (my childhood friend was bipolar and I realized that later on in life lol smh) anyway, I think it’s good to always seek to be better as a person for you first, for the ones you love and for everyone else that will benefit from being in your presence. Thanks for your wisdom and transparency Breeny, always helps. Blessings sis 💕

[@katenorfolk2327]

Really love how authentic you are and how real this video is thank you x

[@MY-qm6yz]

Never felt so called out😅 love the video.

[@ToniaAlex13]

I have realized months ago that I was emotionally unavailable and attract those same men

[@ToniaAlex13]

Just to add - I'm specifically taking about romantic relationships. For some reason I can be total open with my best friend or other close friends.

[@thekimberlynproject]

“You can’t selectively numb…” wow, Ty!

[@MarleyBloodrose]

The way you explained my entire dating experiences for the past two years. You are such a goddess! Thank you for this coaching lesson

[@johannaandujar4015]

Gurl the hair is giving 😍

[@Thevintagebootgirl]

Being emotionally unavailable in relationships comes from abuse in my experience. I was emotionally available to my last partner & they used that against me - that betrayal of trust runs deep. I pray for healing for anyone dealing with heart-walls as a form of protection 💜

[@miaaa333_x]

Breeny the minute I clicked on this video I knew you was gonna hit the nail on the head. 40 seconds in and you hit every nail on the head.

[@JA-rc6is]

I felt like this was just what i needed to hear.. i know it since a while..time to take action and learn to be softer .. open and not allways the strong one for everyvody else.. thank you!

[@mkar1990]

Can we talk about how gorgeous you look!! And the hair BAYYYBEEE 😮‍💨😮‍💨🔥🔥. Thanks for this message because I was hurt emotionally by my ex and I did not realise that until late last year early this year.

[@adbeulalie743]

Thank you so much for this video, it's the best I've seen in a long time ! I can finally put my finger on a problem. Sometimes it's hard to admit that we have some responsibility in what happens to us, and sometimes it is so unconscious ! It resonates to Paris !

[@bevmd8787]

Thank you for not mincing your words it's said " honesty is the best policy " 🙌🏾✨️

[@angesilinou8597]

This is the video I needed without knowing I needed it this bad 👏🏿👏🏿

[@Martina_E]

You are speaking legit facts. I’m on a healing spiritual growth journey and praying, journaling and therapy helps so much. I’m grateful 😊❤️🙏🏾🐛🦋

[@angesilinou8597]

@@Martina_E soo happy for you that’s honestly amazing! Still trying to work on my relationship with God and starting my first therapy session in couple days so excited for this heeling journey🙏🏿🤍

[@Martina_E]

@@angesilinou8597 thank you and I’m glad for you and all of us on these healing spiritual growing journey

[@chitchat1212]

This was deep. I can relate. When you feel as if your in a safe environment, breathe & remind yourself its okay to express.

[@maguiedossantos2925]

You're preaching from beginning to end of this video. I simply just loved the message and I can relate to everything you said 💯🎯❤❤❤👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@MissMatija]

This was so helpful thank you. I realised that I really switched between being emotionally unavailable and emotionally anxious all the time I never had the time to be my true authentic self and I would never feel like ppl could see me cus I always had a mask on

[@ichewsme]

this video is so important

[@Beej329]

The crazy self exposure that resonates with us all 😂

[@kemyunique4958]

Breeny you are telling FACTS here. This is absolutely true I believe that this is what is going right now we are all scared of each other and not being truthful for others or to ourselves. I love your videos Breeny 🔝💯😍🫶

[@deliataylor5689]

Thank you Breeny 🙏I can so relate to you as recently hurt after break up from a toxic relationship. I am looking forward to attending your Vision Party this Saturday 😊x

[@jasmineroussell4441]

I saw that interview as well. Very stoic. Even when she cried it was poised & felt performative & then she quickly turned the emotions off.

[@STTPlan]

You kill the side part every time ❤

[@mahsabehnamrad6523]

I love you, Breeny Lee ~ please keep going on healing videos. You are helping many people like me who are having a hard time returning to themselves and finding their true selves! LOVE YOU

[@musi_33]

I just realised that I’m emotionally unavailable! And I’m not even trying to be! 😢

[@knc910]

Just a message to say that I really love your makeup on this video. It looks natural. And the hairstyle is stunning too. You look so beautiful! 🥰

[@tiyapriscilla13]

I found myself tearing up towards the end of this! A massive eye opener. I definitely felt so seen watching this and at the same time kinda annoyed thinking Breeny, why you calling us out like this ha! Feeling inspired to do some self reflection because unfortunately, this is me.

[@karenkariuki7787]

Hey Breeny, I just want thank you because personally you help me become so self aware, your videos are like therapy sessions for me. You are such a blessing. So much love From Kenya🇰🇪

[@user-js8cr3yo1o]

I really felt like i am being understood.Seeing this video is felt like i was having a deep talk with you.And be cured by this.Thank you

[@mssue7537]

It seems like we live in an age when you’re considered inauthentic or not real if you don’t spill all your feelings to strangers who don’t care about you as a person. It’s like everyone in the world is entitled to your private life. In a way, I get why that sense of entitlement exists towards people who sign up to be reality TV stars - it’s in the job description. But why, as a regular member of the public, are other people entitled to my private life? I feel like I’m in a real-life episode of Black Mirror, where people get rewarded with a luxurious lifestyle if they trauma dump on the public. The more pain they share with strangers, the bigger the reward. I reject that way of living. Not everything has to be on social media. Now the phrase “being transparent” seems to mean if you don’t bare your soul on social media, you are fake. Being “authentic” involves choosing how you live your life. My life is mine, so I will decide what and what not to share. Just as the most precious and joyful moments are experienced in private, it’s okay to embrace your losses, sadness, and trauma in private. This too is “real”.

[@QueenLDes]

Yes yes and yes sister. What’s all this emotional bull.

[@QueenLDes]

It’s almost blackmailing 😂 I’m not in pains I just don’t want to show that side of me.

[@QueenLDes]

Very articulated comment by the way.

[@mssue7537]

@@QueenLDes Thank you! I never thought of it as blackmailing before, but you’re right - it is just like that.

[@miriamlacoste547]

That's a good way to define being authentic.some of these videos confuse me more cause it make sense in certain situations but not really able to apply to the real world

[@katherinengo4452]

I am truly grateful for your wisdom Breeny, this video came at the perfect moment. Fear and love can’t coexist.✨ God bless you🫶🏻

[@eunicepepple7752]

This video is so triggering ( the truth is in my face and I struggle to accept it )yet therapeutic( a lot of reflecting ). Thanks Breeny 😘