I Regret My Virginity | A Christian Perspective

Welcome back to A Journey With Jordan!
Thank you for contributing to the safe space that is this channel. I know today’s video got a little heavy, but remember to take a nice, deep breath.
Search the scriptures for yourself, and the LORD will reveal Himself to you.
Scripture Reference:
Matthew 5:8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.”

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I may make a full video to address the comment I’m about to make but I could not hold off any longer before doing so. There has been a STARK contrast in the responses I’ve received from women verses that of men regarding this conversation around virginity and purity. The *majority* of the men who have commented have somehow directed and framed the conversation to focus on themselves, the males species, and “what men want” rather than focusing it on The Creator God which raises a few questions for me concerning the heart posture of said commenters. The *majority* of women who have commented have done so shifting the focus and glory back to God. Now the question arises, why? Why do *many* of the men that commented on this video feel that a woman’s virginity has anything and everything to do with men, while the *majority* of the women who commented feel their virginity is centered around The LORD?

[@lavettesmith156]

Respectfully; do it for yourself! If you live long enough- you question your God- about "why certain things are how they are". It may upset/discourage, you -when you realize- it doesn't make sense and only favors men. & women on their program, will encourage you to follow- with no questions asked. If, I would have had a choice and not been misguided; I'd be a 42 plus year old virgin! Masturbate, if you get the urge. It's your body. It's no sin- in learning/pleasing your own flesh- "solo". That's- why our bodies are made a certain way. No penetration required. It's healthy. We, ain't only here to breed & be tools for men. Some Husbands, leave/cheat/mistreat- when they want, to. They, sometimes- are in the streets; getting pleasure- while the "pure" one stays untouched., until he gets her dirty. Love is beautiful if, we know self...

[@FranchizKeng]

Sounds like your creating a gender war. categorizing and making assumptions. is this just a safe place for you?

[@lbee8247]

Wow. I'm so glad you replied and pinned. I hope the men who commented see and are convicted. May God continue to use you. Truth does comfort and encourage. It just doesn't do it in a way we feel immediately. Flattery is the opposite.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Who is this comment directed toward? @franchizkengcommonsense

[@MsWillita8]

To all you virgins. I was a virgin married at 33 and had my first child at 35. I may be the exception and not the rule, but I strongly believe that God will bless you in his perfect timing.

[@LilyIglesias]

Amén! 🙏🏻❤️

[@levelintent]

How did you meet your husband

[@MsWillita8]

@@levelintent I was at work when he saw me. He asked for my number and I gave him my email,lol. He apparently knew that day I was going to be his wife. I wasn’t looking to be in a relationship. I was traveling and happily single.

[@levelintent]

@@MsWillita8 Thank you. You are helping me see something I need to see... which is that I have to make myself available and talk to men, I can't just "wait" for God to bring me someone.

[@MsWillita8]

@@levelintent Be friendly, but I wouldn’t recommend coming on to them. Men like to chase not be chased. We met at a time I was happily single and healed from past relationships.

[@gotellthatfoxapologetics]

I'm 45 and a virgin. No regrets in sight, Jesus is worth being glorified in it all.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I COMMEND you. I don’t know what brought you down this particular path but I feel hopeful.

[@prudencedantye9297]

What? Wow. All respect for you. If I may ask, are you waiting for marriage or it’s just a path you have chosen?

[@osdenza]

Damn

[@gotellthatfoxapologetics]

@@prudencedantye9297 getting married soon

[@user-sj3ri1yn6m]

@@gotellthatfoxapologetics Alright. Congratulations and all the best!!! God is faithful.

[@kristadavis2825]

My favorite aunt is 54 and a virgin. She chose to honor God by helping others, living with and caring for her parents until their deaths, and not pursuing a relationship. She is the most selfless person and an inspiration.

[@ThroughTheHaze]

That makes me feel better to hear that. I will be 37 soon and am still a virgin. Sometimes I feel alone because of it.

[@kristadavis2825]

Please don’t feel alone. We and who we love, the relationships we build, and how we impact the world is more than what happens with our genitals. That shouldn’t even be a factor for how you view your life, unless you are using that part of your body to dishonor yourself and God and realize repentance and healing are needed.

[@ikechukwumarvelous8768]

Am happy she's still a virgin her hymen is still intact thats an honor am a virgin too 26 am waiting till marriage. Waiting for the right one, my soulmate. She's gonna marry she should hold on tight to God and his promises. And remember every virgin has a reward check the bible all virgins got they reward. Also remember jesus was the reward of his mother.

[@c.f.okonta8815]

I don’t believe that she is at 54

[@XxMercuriiXx]

@@ikechukwumarvelous8768what’s the reward?

[@autumn3510]

I think the book is very clear! As a Christian that has had pre-martial sex on multiple occasions it is clear that it is a sin. You can’t change the word of God just to make you feel better. But everyone sins and everyone falls short of the glory. I am now married and repentant but would never judge others. But I hate when people say it’s not a sin. Like what book are you reading

[@Poodle_Gun]

You have no horse in this race. You have no idea what this is like. Don't tell us what you think. It doesn't matter. You have no moral high ground to say that at all. This is years of grinding celebacy and extreme asceticism that we never volunteered for. Instead, be thankful you got a second chance: even better, the advantage of knowing how to work a dick and get a husband. Be humble and thankful. Then, be silent. You can only ever learn from this, not teach. I doubt you'll learn the lesson. There's a word for that: sanctimonious. Meditate on not being that word, and you've one half the battle of being a new Christian or rebirthed, revirginated daughter of the King. Or whatever.

[@jollygoodgordon5580]

You can judge, jou just can’t condemn, meaning send to hell. Because we humans don’t have that power. But often times many(even christians) make this mistake in thinking, they think they can’t judge, first of all bible clearly says we are to judge, judge righteously, secondly: judging and condemning are not the same thing. Also, it’s not logical to think we humans should not judge because our daly life’s revolve round making judgements we judge everyday and throughout the day. God bless.

[@msmiami212]

It’s pretty unbecoming to defend judgement as a character trait, especially when seeking to walk a Christlike path. Just because The Bible does not explicitly condemn this trait, doesn’t mean we should ignore context clues to know that cultivating a judgmental character is a path towards being contemptuous. It leaves no room for humility or to be teachable. It breeds arrogance. You should know that it’s a curious and guiding nature that’s rewarded by the Lord - as it is the meek who shall inherit the earth. John 8:7 - He whom is without sin amongst you, cast the first stone.

[@jollygoodgordon5580]

who is talking about judging as a character trait? the judging im talking about is actually helping in the christian walk because it will help you decide which people to mingle with and which to avoid, it will help to know what is a wrong teaching being taught and whats not, or if someone is pratising and preaching unbiblical thigs. and context clues? its very clear what the write meant if you read the context: dont be a hypocrite, as i said before. when you judge it should not be a condemning judgemnt, because thats not within our power anyways..because we cannot send/ condemn people to hell. all other points you're making, are validating my point. @@msmiami212

[@rachelchristiaans3045]

@@jollygoodgordon5580u will be judged based on the way u judge others good luck

[@zoekrk2933]

I was a virgin until I was 24 years old after debating with myself on whether God would ever come through for me or not. I did it outside of God's timing and provision and there doesn't pass a day where I don't deeply regret it. To give a bit of backstory I hadn't made any pledges of purity in my life, I didn't even consider sex outside of marriage a sin when I first came to know God. However in my teenage years when everyone around me seemed to be having their first times I kept seeing my friends heartbroken with their first times being nothing special at best and with abusive partners at worst. I didn't want that for myself. I told myself my first time will be with someone who genuinely cares about me as a person. But years kept passing and no one I had feelings for ever returned them. After too many heartbreaks with my heart in pieces I cried out to God one day, why does this keep happening? When will I be loved in return? That's when I was given a revelation, that I am to save myself for marriage, and only meant to love and be loved by one man in my life. Even still years kept passing I kept getting lonelier, more heartbroken, more bitter and eventually someone came my way that convinced me to lose my virginity to him. At this point I have to mention my virginity had become somewhat of a prison for me. All I knew were worldly people who thought it weird for someone my age to be a virgin. I was worldly myself, maybe I still am to some extent- God is working on me. So I did it, my first "partner" was extremely abusive and completely not right for me. He made me feel like having sex with me was doing me a favor. Like a sort of right of passage for me to start having "fun" while waiting for a future husband that may or may not come. The experience broke me in so many ways, I'm still healing from years later. I should have believed God and his promise to me. If there is a takeaway from this, I'd like you to know that if God has put in your heart your desire for a husband you should ask Him about it. If he has someone set aside for you you'll know. You might not know who that is yet but I advise you to keep praying about it. It has been a good amount of years since I had my revelation and I still didn't listen, and even recently after I received a time frame it's hard for me to believe that it will actually happen. However I've remained celibate, if anything else out of heartbreak and I try to keep my hopes up for when the day eventually comes. Keeping high hopes and faith through all this is the most challenging thing for me. If you read through all this, thank you for listening and I hope you were able to take something out of it to help with your situation whether that was strengthening your conviction or setting you on a journey in search of personal revelation. May God keep our hearts.

[@1sabella]

Thank you for sharing! This is wonderfully written invaluable advice

[@joyjemmott6278]

This is my similar experience which I'm going through right now. I'm 22, and I didn't make any personal pledges on my virginity or anything... I just knew that I didn't want the heartbreak and unwanted pregnancies that my classmates and friends were going through. I kept boyfriends to a limit, only had two... Draw the clear line. I don't want to be "distracted with sex", if we serious, we'll get married and do it. I gave myself a false sense of boundaries and security within those relationships and "rules" I set for myself. I didn't personally actually want to wait... And I didn't believe in love or that the right person would come along and marry me and the hot mess I think I am. I grew up in a Christian environment. I know all the scriptures, but I still adopted worldly desires for having a "little bit of fun" before buckling down and waiting on my 'husband'. Again, I didn't want to mess around or have no casual flings or have sex. But I failed to see that hormones are real... And I couldn't live a certain life and expect that I wouldn't sin. The most ironic thing is... I didn't give up my virginity to my boyfriend.. But to a guy who was in a messy relationship and didn't even say he wanted anything with me. We just had this intense sexual connection and bam, a few months of flirting and I'm in a bed, my virginity gone and in a situationship that is costing me my relationship with my family, God, and my ex boyfriend, who does love me. I feel so unpure now... Battling all these raging feelings, while struggling to pick up my pieces right now... And get over the toxic, sex cycle me and the boy fell in. And try and have the right attitude to trust that God, knows better for me. I failed once... I don't want to give up my chance at a godly marriage for this lack luster pleasure.

[@sephlove]

may God bless you abundantly my sister! 💞

[@XxMercuriiXx]

Don’t hold on to those regrets too long or deeply, it’s going to harbor and cause other issues. Forgive yourself

[@johntesfay3621]

Thanks so much for this ❤ I’m a 33 y/o virgin and I've struggled with idea for years now! I had so many opportunities to get some but Gods convictions were to loud and real so I couldn't do it. Now after waiting for so long for love and a wife, I sometimes regret that saved myself. I’m still single and finding true love seems unlikely! Idk but I'll keep fighting I guess

[@christopherholden66]

I chose to keep my virginity to honor God. As a man it’s very hard I need to work on the purity part a lot more but at the age of 24 and considering the times I would like to dedicate my life to serving God. He gives me strength to stay on the path that I’m on.

[@ladyliz9981]

Same, I’m 23 and I feel like there is a downside to hookup culture and “the wait.” Just hope that one day we all find someone that understands.

[@raheemcamal998]

Facts brother

[@lofi5992]

keep going bro

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Christopher thank you for sharing your testimony. I'm inspired with how you've leaned on God to be your strength through this life. He will not fail as your Father, Friend, or Savior. You got this and God's got you.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I hope The LORD sends someone who will understand your sacrifice.

[@suebaybee]

I saved myself until I got married. I am now divorced, and back to keeping my body, temple , and gift. & I thank God for that. I love the Lord more than I love myself, and I thank him for keeping me.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I want to be at that place! At a place where I love God ABOVE ALL ELSE. You are so special.

[@mahri9022]

What caused you guys to get divorced if you don’t mind me asking?

[@suebaybee]

@mahri9022 sure. He stated that he was too young to have gotten married. He was a broken person who couldn't give me what I deserved. He hope to one day find himself. And said he thought that if he gotten married it would help eliminate all the problems he had...

[@suebaybee]

@ajourneywithjordan thank you, you are special as well

[@broco6608]

​@@ajourneywithjordan Keep making this your goal and seeking it out. Keep wanting to love God more than yourself. It's a work in progress.

[@christinajohnson3829]

I am 35 years old and I am a virgin. I have felt all of this before I don't have issues with it as much now...but I have had the same issue. When I turn 26 and still not married I was upset because ppl told me when I was younger that if you save yourself then the Lord will bless you with a husband but that is not a promise of God. I love this topic because I don't think ppl talk about this a lot.

[@sai7sai]

33yr old virgin here - I have come to learn that choosing purity is for our own benefit and a husband isn't a reward for our obedience Tbh if marriage isnt God's wil for me, I believe it'll be easier since I never had sex

[@bevs9995]

if you are christian -- how could you not find a husband ?

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I hope that you will have HOPE, JOY, & PEACE with whatever path your life continues on. You are in my prayers tonight Christina.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I feel the same way. Exactly the same way.

[@soithinkicandance007]

​@@bevs9995 because God doesn't promise all Christians a spouse and God is not constrained by societal timelines. A single season can be way longer for one person compared to another.

[@LupitaM-xr2pj]

I'm still relatively young (17) and only recently began thinking about the life God wants me to live, but I struggle a lot both imagining myself having s*x outside of marriage and also saving myself for marriage. It's really hard to live in a society that believes it's okay to be vulnerable and intimate with complete strangers. It's just hard to imagine that there's someone out there who I'm compatible with that would understand why I'm saving myself and respects that choice (doesn't try to convince me/pressure me).

[@sagemae2993]

We are in the same boat turning 18 soon and struggling,I used to think that it was so easy to save myself but after some testimonies I realised that if I kept on having those bad thoughts they can lead me to normalizing sexual immortality mat 21 I think talks about our spirit it willing but the flesh is weak that is why we need to pray at all time ,praying for you hope we get freed from bad habits that threaten our purity

[@lola_la_cava]

I'm in the same battle. I'm 16 and I've got TRULY converted just some months ago. I've already been seeing people and sex the wrong way my entire life before God entered it. going through puberty and being strong against lust is not easy. and I've fallen so many times already. it's also not easy to find a man that understands and respects my choice, and it doesn't help me to be strong against immoral ideas. I'm praying for you, guys, I know it's hard. but it's all worth it. God bless you! ❤️

[@cartergirl3of3]

Keep your virginity. It will be hard, very hard the older you get. But keep it, trust me. The grass is not greener on the other side.

[@brittanybey1700]

Praying that you guys keep the faith and trust God even through this challenging journey. I’m now married, but in my young adult/teenage life I was very rebellious and did not save myself for marriage. I regret that decision, because now while in marriage I still have to deal with the consequences of my past of sexual immorality and soul ties that I tied myself too. Sex before marriage is not worth it. If you’re not already, get around some strong minded believers that could be mentors for you and also center yourself around likeminded people that are in your age group. Thats going to help you as well. Sometimes when you have friends or associates that don’t practice what you do, it’s even easier to fall into sin. Pray fervently and stay in your word and in due time God will meet all your desires❤️

[@BloodLeopard-rm8wg]

I'm 22 and still a virgin and I thought the same way at your age, please believe me you will not regret keeping your purity. Sorry to sound harsh but there's too many worthless people out there who DO NOT care about you and I promise you you do not want a soul tie or a bond with a demonic person. Stay focused and prayed up, you got this.

[@npjm.99]

Girl you not missing much. Waiting for marriage is so worth it. Dont let anyone convince you otherwise.

[@barbwireb7779]

She waited long enough and god don’t have a partner for everyone. And if you don’t think it’s all that you probably had a bad partner

[@vicktory214]

Thank you for sharing! I’m also a virgin. I've never even kissed a guy, let alone had sex. None the less, I have battled masturbation and porn. By Gods Grace and guidance He’s delivered me from this. It took a women’s Bible study on purity, fasting prayer and cutting out music and shows I genuinely liked 😩 Real talk. As I approach my 30th birthday, I've been thinking a lot about my 20’s. I do sometimes wonder if once I'm married, if I'll like having sex. I ask my what if I don't get married or what if my husband isn't good at sex, and I'm stuck with him? But even if, a word that’s been encouraging me as I walk this out step by step comes from the creation story. Seeing God as the Great Creator and author of all life I’m encouraged by the verses in Genesis that says that when God created each day, He said that it is good! I have to chose to put my trust in Him and believe that whether I live the rest of my life single or if I get married that because God is writing my story then it will be good.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you so much for sharing your journey!

[@chayahhayes4952]

the end … that’ll preach .. thanks for sharing keep trusting for His word says he has an expected end 🩷🙂

[@tennillewalls8142]

I’m so happy I stumbled upon this video. I’m 43 and have had a similar journey as y’all. I’ve felt like the Lord is telling me singleness is what He has for me since 2019. I’m at peace with this but get so very frustrated when fellow Christians treat me and singleness like a cancer that needs to be eradicated. I’m also thankful for forgiveness for those years when I wasn’t mentally pure.

[@Deanna974]

Pretty much same story as you, sis. I'll be 32 in a few months. Btw, you're very pretty!

[@amys2814]

Wow, such wisdom, thank you!

[@november132]

We are either called to a married life or a celibate life.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

That’s one of the more biblically based responses I’ve heard in a long time. Wish it were discussed more in the church.

[@genovasquez8361]

I disagree with celibacy

[@hunter3551]

​@genovasquez8361 why?

[@broco6608]

​@@genovasquez8361 Then you disagree with the Bible.

[@playahayta421]

Heey thank you for your word. Can you share the bible verses, that supports your claims? Thank you

[@Ann12098]

I chose to save myself until marriage to honor God above all and to honor my future husband. I met my husband at 27 and we got married at 29! I’m so grateful I met someone who was okay (and excited to join me) in waiting until marriage.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

That’s a blessing!! Thank you for sharing hope!

[@callme_t]

Did he save his self for you?

[@joshuaguerrier7392]

@@callme_tprolly not

[@callme_t]

@@joshuaguerrier7392 which is the problem with these church teachings. Encouraging women to “stay pure and wait until marriage” meanwhile the guys don’t get the same message pushed down their throats like women do. Because congratulations to her I guess, hope her husband had the same mindset.

[@rubiksworld2170]

@@callme_tMen 100% have to follow this too. Any church that doesn’t reinforce this or how a Godly man should act is doing something wrong

[@marchesherlock4170]

whewwww!! God thank you; I've found my people!! I'm 27 and will be 28 in October and I'm a virgin also, some of my friends look at my sideways and ask how....IDC what no one says I will wait for my HUSBAND, I am meant for 1 MAN! Thanks for telling your story.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

And thank you for telling yours. God bless you!

[@cartergirl3of3]

Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT question your virginity. I was saving myself for marriage. I wanted to be with someone who loved me, but by the time I got to 27 and I had never had a boyfriend and NO ONE had loved me I started panicking. It weighed so heavily on me. It scared me to go on a date because men can be so cruel. At 27 I got coerced into losing my virginity by the guy I was seeing. He said it was fine at first but then asked for a little more and more each time and even though I said no at first, I gave in. That "situashionship" died shortly after. The same coercion and weakness on my part happened a second time with another man that I slept with once. At least he and I got along well but I realized after that he wasnt in it for a relationship. Now, I have absolutely sworn myself to never be with another man unless he is the one I'm marrying. I think about how, and why and to whom I lost my virginity, and it fills me with deep regret. My virginity weighed heavily on me and friends often made fun of me (friends who had been with hundreds of men might I add). In a way, I suppose I feel lighter not having it constantly on my mind anymore, but I no longer feel special and i would give so much to get that back now that I've experienced the hurt and pain and messiness from the other side. My best friend lost it BEFORE marriage but to the man she is now engaged to. She will have only been with one man and the jealousy I have is unfathomable. I watch videos like this and I feel like a cold little orphan outside looking in through the window to a happy family having Christmas dinner, something I once had and desire but now am no longer apart of. I'm telling you, as someone who has seen the other side, the grass is NOT greener.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

First of all, you are extremely special. Much more than I can even witness through reading the short version of your story. You’re so special, in fact, that it warmed my heart to read your comment. Secondly, if you believe in the very God that I do, then you know you are not an orphan. We are all heirs to the kingdom. so you do not have to watch from the outside, come on inside where you belong. Thirdly, I hope you listened very clearly to the video to know that I find nothing quite special about being a virgin. What I DO find special is God’s faithfulness towards me throughout my particular journey. However, I want you to remember that, that same faithfulness has carried you as far as you’ve come. in spite of the decisions that you may regret, they’ve made you into the person that you are… the very special person that you are, and there’s so much that we would like to “do over” in our lives, but the truth is everything is as it should be. I truly appreciate you for watching the video, and I hope that you find joy and hope again.

[@soithinkicandance007]

Jesus covers you and God loves you dearly and does not view you as defective. You've already paid for the consequences because of the season of grief, remorse, and regret you've experienced. But God welcomes you with open arms and he has forgiven you even before you got pressured and gave in. Take the lesson from David when he was mourning and praying for God to not take his firstborn that was conceived through his adultery with Bathsheba. When the Lord took their firstborn, David bathed and ate and continued on with life as usual. He paid the price and repented and God accepted him. This is coming from someone that's been there done that. My story is exactly the same as yours. Got coerced at 27 and because of the heartbreak and shame I was dealing from that, I did it again with the rebound. Now it's a memory that's in the past, I paid my dues. I love God and God loves me and life goes on. Those guys were predatory by the way and that's on them. The guilt that belongs to them, that's not for us to carry.

[@TheSacredRoomWithLadyT]

@ajourneywithjordan . Please forgive me if this is the horrible job you were talking about when people try to encourage you. I read that you feel as if being a virgin is not a badge of honor. I just think about all the diseases out there, people putting holes in condoms, or getting in situations where one is not worn, soul ties to the point people killing others, and themselves due to the soul ties received through intimacy, the heartbreak of desiring to wait until marriage for so long then slipping or falling. What if you get pregnant by someone and they are not right and cause damages to the child or harm them. The chances of you breaking that celibacy and never marrying the person or people you gave it up to 💔 Abortions even from people who swore they would never have on. Also let's not forget those who virginity were taking from them. The bible speaks or basically gives clues about how virginity it to be honored. Think about Tamar who was raped (touch, penetrated and not a virgin anymore due to the rape). She rathered the guy who raped her married her than be "defiled" or a woman without honor. Also think about how Amnon sweared he loved and wanted Tamar so much but as soon as he tried to fulfill his flesh and raped her he HATED her. Imagine how that felt? The devil is slick and the wages of sin is death. We do not get to choose that death rather it's physically, spiritual, mental, or in whichever way. There will be a consequence even if you do repent. Also there is no guarantee when you have sex you will enjoy it. And I don't even mean just the first time. Rather it's due to the physical act or due to person who have it with, including how they treat you afterwards and etc. Which means you can open your body multiple times and still not enjoy it and have horrible experiences with those who have sex with. I'm a very blunt person but if you haven't received something yet including myself it's because a reason. Continue to seek and ask God why and He will reveal now or maybe even not but we must Trust that All things work out for our good who are called according to His purpose and love Him. Having sex with people never guarantees love, safety, companionship, or even intimacy but being with God does. Just like you said curiosity kills the cat and it definitely did with me as well 💯 Outside of God it could be such a waste and huge regret. But God instead God gives gifts without sorrow. Remember the devil tempts and the Lord allows test. If you are regretting staying a virgin it is not from God or your natural desires but the devil. Because what will regretting staying a virgin soon turn into? Same thing with me and thoughts of just settling with guys even though they don't want to wait until marriage or not my God ordained spouse. That's the Devil. God bless you Sis I'll be praying for us all. Just please remember the wages of Sin is death, we reap what we sow, and God chastises those who He loves. People who have sinned aren't always aware of or tell others everythinnnng they went through because of that sin. 💯💯💯 The devil comes to KILL, STEAL, AND DESTROY. Resit the devil and he will flee. Also flee RUN from fornication 🏃🏿‍♀️🏃🏿‍♀️🏃🏿‍♀️ Cast ALL your cares to the Lord because He cares for you ♥️

[@joshuaguerrier7392]

@@TheSacredRoomWithLadyTamen sister, I don’t know why she has to compromise the word of God to comfort people, if you sin you have to feel the aftermath of it. She strucks me as these new worldly Christians that take part of the Bible while disregarding she dosent agree with due to not matching with her on her stance. The Bible speaks about how virginity should be honored and it is honorable.

[@MutedMinimalist]

⁠@@TheSacredRoomWithLadyTClearly you have never messed up greatly and had the mercy of God pull you out of your mess and use what was meant for evil for good. There wasn’t anything wrong with what she said. That mentality is so hurtful to the numerous of men and women who have made mistakes and are trying to do better and those whose virginity was taken from them without consent.

[@coop8089]

I’m a 29 year old virgin and girl this video speaks volumes of my own experience/journey. Loneliness definitely hits deep sometimes but I think what hits deeper is when others point it out chileeeee don’t tell me Ik babes. To God be the glory for bringing us this far in a time where it’s like there’s no escaping it

[@vivi-ex9vm]

You’re such an inspiration, i am 23 and in the same boat, it’s easy to feel behind but we don’t work on the worlds time. We work on Gods timing

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Say that!! We work according to God’s timing. May we always keep that in mind.

[@namelesswreck6383]

I have found that people who have sex before marriage regret it and say " I wish I would have waited"... sometimes in the waiting period you get really discouraged, you find yourself saying I'm going to have sex, time is passing and my ability to have children is fading, then I'm reminded of the story of so many people in the Bible who try to force something out of season and it went horribly wrong, I asked myself this questions a lot,.. what if I had kids with the wrong person? what if my life and my child's life turned out to be a nightmare, just because I wanted a child, what if later I find a man who is the right one for me?.. I could have had everything that I wanted without me helping God. life is full of choices, Choose Wisely because you are the one who is going to live with the consequences.

[@stephaniejsmes8991]

So true! Women can have a challenging time of getting pregnant after 35. I have a couple of friends that did not get married until their 30s and it took years to be able to get pregnant. Of course this is not the case for everyone. There are people that get pregnant easy at 36, 40, 41, 42, 43 and 44 years old. My coworker told me that her mom had her at 51 years old and then turned around and had her sister at 52 years old. She was a big surprise. Yes, she conceived them naturally. She had siblings who were almost 30 years older than her. But when I think of her story, I think about God's timing and God's miracles.

[@namelesswreck6383]

@@stephaniejsmes8991 thank you, I'm sure that this will bring hope to many women 🙂

[@Poodle_Gun]

Those people are eating sht

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Please be respectful. You don’t need to agree, by any means, but on this channel we respect one another. Also, I really enjoyed reading your comment, I just haven’t had a chance to respond. Thank you for the insight you provided.

[@jacquelyngreen4210]

@@Poodle_GunThat wasn’t necessary, please stop even eluding to cursing.

[@faithwe74]

I am now married, but I took the same path. I was 41 when I got married, and I so agree with you in that I thought because I waited it was supposed to happen. Nonetheless, I still trusted in God's timing. That same mindset, though, followed me into marriage. I thought that I would just get pregnant and didn't realize that, like marriage, children are a gift from God. Almost 9 years later, I question God's decision not to bless us with a child, but I am slowly letting that go. I pray for you and everyone on this journey, trust God and his heart towards you.

[@Nikki-ks6wi]

It’s easier to say no to sex than the regret of not saying no. I gave into heavy pressure from a guy thinking it would never happen for me. I am now married 5 years to a man that waited with me for 4.5 years before we got married. 2 years in college 1 year in our careers 1.5 years engaged. Even when it’s hard days I marriage know he loves me because he loved all of me with zero physical intimacy before marriage.

[@Chuck.Mast3r]

26 with no regrets. It's been difficult in many ways, but I'm grateful from the wisdom people spoke into my life. The more life I live the more I know why sin is sin.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

God bless you.

[@MouseCrusader]

Thank you for this video! The disappointment of waiting and failed expectation is not talked enough in churches. Usually you would hear the positive uplifting encouragement of remaining faithful and God will bless your faith. Which is not in it of itself bad. Yet we rarely hear about when you're remaining faithful;, and God hasn't blessed you yet. When you feel overlooked. The times when you feel like there's no point in remaining faithful b/c the faithless is getting blessed everyday. The lonely nights, the raging hormones with no outlet, the genuine frustration of having to deal with them, and the genuine fear of being alone. I do believe if the desire is there, then God will honor that, and He will honor your sacrifice, but sometimes knowing that is just not enough. I'm with you that in knowing that you're not alone in how you feel, is comforting. I pray for everyone here who's feeling like this, to find comfort in the Lord during this time, that out faith is grows, and that the Lord will honor our faith swiftly, suddenly, and without sorrow when the time is right ♥♥

[@jaquaveonandress649]

This is exactly how I feel. Everyone seems to have a beautiful testimony for obeying Gods word but a lot of us still have yet to see if the grass is really greener on the other side

[@MouseCrusader]

@@jaquaveonandress649 True. but the grass is greener where you water it. I know my initial comment seems as if I'm only frustrated with my singleness, however part of me is appreciative of the time I have to not only grow my relationship with the Lord but also yo grow as a person. Sometimes it doesn't feel that way lol

[@jaquaveonandress649]

@@MouseCrusader Appreciate the clarity 💯. God Bless 🙏🏾

[@PureCurebyFaith]

From Intimacy and Fellowship With GOD all Good things flow friend. We are not alone, our Relationship With GOD is active and Living. It keeps on everyday all the time. Physical sensations are not worth forgetting about GOD or getting angry at Him for not rewarding us for living for Him...at that point are we really living for Him if we demand something back?

[@MouseCrusader]

@@PureCurebyFaith you're not wrong my friend, but God made us physical beings that desire relationship. It's natural for us to want what God made us to want. For sure it can become an idol, but being honest with how we feel when our desires are unmet doesn't always mean we're making it an idol!

[@chelsea5226]

As a 32 year old virgin, I found this comforting and encouraging. I understand the spite and anger. I did romance books, which is still mind altering.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you for sharing. Seriously. We will push past and enjoy the peace of God that a pure heart and mind allows.

[@princessyas930]

As a Muslim woman saving herself for marriage and also struggling, this was so refreshing & validating to hear ❤️

[@ajourneywithjordan]

You're never alone. Thank you so much for watching and resonating with my story. God bless you!

[@martinmutuna6641]

Am an adult African male you just took the words out of my mouth its good to know you are not alone indeed ,tis so sweet to trust in Jesus.

[@lofi5992]

i wish i would’ve waited i’m a 24 y/o male and i lost mine at 22. it was with my then ex, i thought she was the one. parts of me was hoping that if i complied i could get her back. i soon found out after that i was just on her hit list. i lacked self respect and a relationship with God. keep going and don’t let anyone sway you from the Father whether you’re still a virgin or not. stay strong, i pray God keep you all and blesses you❤

[@kadiant5016]

wow. honestly, your story is so refreshing. I’ve never heard a male’s perspective on this particular subject. I resonate with your story & I pray that you also remain faithful to God in all seasons.

[@lofi5992]

@@kadiant5016 thank you, i appreciate the word of encouragement.

[@arlenetheresad8293]

As an unashamed non virgin this was very interesting and beautiful to watch. Thank you for sharing this.

[@bribella_xo7083]

Girl I’m 32 and still a virgin. God honors obedience and celibacy saves you from a lot of suffering (spiritual and physical)

[@skalias815]

I love your honesty! I also since a young age, swore I would keep my virginity and I was proud to keep my virginity too but to be fair the opportunities to lose my virginity weren't really there anyways. Like you, I also kept it as a badge of honor and looking back I felt like I was rubbing it into God's face as in to say "look God, see what I am doing for you." Like God had to be thankful I was keeping my virginity for Him, which is really selfish to think that God has to thank me for not sinning lol. Anyways my relationship with God wasn't really where it was supposed to be and I put my worth and value into one day becoming a wife/mother and being married. I put that on a pedestal, it was my ultimate desire on this earth. There is nothing wrong about desiring marriage but I definitely idolized the idea of marriage and love. Which honestly is probably why I ended up losing my virginity at 21. At that time I felt like I was already becoming too old to not have even kissed a guy or even dated anyone. I was desperate to just have a boyfriend, because like I said before put my value into being loved or wanted by men. So the first guy who even showed me any crumbs of attention, ofcourse I devoured it like a hungry lion. I wanted to be desired so badly that I broke my own promise to God to keep my virginity. In retrospect it makes sense, I put love and marriage above God therefore I deciding to satisfying this guy over God was a natural consequence of that. I regret losing my virginity but I also regret not putting my worth in God first because if I did put my worth in Him, I'm sure I wouldn't have compromised myself like I did. Essentially it does not matter how many sins you try to avoid, if you don't have a genuine relationship with God. The Pharisees kept the commandments better than anyone else like the bible said but still they did not truly know God. I'm not trying to minimize sins, but I'm making it a point that sometimes we can get into a terrority when we become prideful and look at our own righteousness when our relationship with God in reality is lacking.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I need to work on desiring God above all else. He is the ultimate prize and I must keep that in mind. I’ve got a long way to go but I am encouraged by your words. Thank you so much.

[@UNCUT101]

That was good, a lot of people are just Pharisees. They have no relationship with GOD, they serve him with works

[@broco6608]

Great advice! Jesus IS enough. Doesn't mean we can't have desires, but, to put them before Jesus is error.

[@mariaamaka]

U didn’t lose ur virginity U loved God enough to come back into d fold U are still one D moment u made up ur mind to re-take your vows👍🏽 ur previous actions vanished before his sight. U are cherished and loved 🥰 by God. All He wants is that we prove our ❤love for him by KEEPING HIS WORD❤Not only abt sex but abt EVERYTHING he requires of US❤️ John 14:15 If you love me, you will obey my commandments.

[@shoshanas5251]

Very insightful! ❤ Thank you for sharing.

[@BeccaIrene]

You’re amazing. Same exact path here - I’m 33 and coming to grips that I may not get to have children of my own. I’m sure I will marry one day, but not on my preferred timeline. I made my vow to remain a virgin when I was 15 - the year I became a Christian. This is the first time I’m hearing someone else share an experience similar to mine. Thanks for that. If anything, it brought me comfort and it was great to hear someone else verbalize my daily thoughts… ❤

[@lola_la_cava]

I made my vow just some months ago. I'm 16. it's been REALLY HARD lol. going through puberty and being strong against lust is not easy. and I've fallen to it so many times already. but I trust Him with all my heart and I know He always teaches me a lot trough these tough times. was it hard for you too?

[@aliatianna888]

Wow that’s kinda sad

[@ajourneywithjordan]

We serve a God who does the impossible right? So do not lose hope. Whatever The LORD has spoken over your life, my friend, is what He will carry out. Children OF YOUR OWN are still possible. Believe for you desire, not for what anyone tells you, you should desire.I hope my video did not discourage you in anyway. Lean into Him. He’s got you.

[@dont5397]

Foolish mistake

[@lola_la_cava]

@@dont5397 judging someone else's hard times? foolish mistake. I'm praying for you. God bless you.

[@JaxMchunu]

This is one of the most honest and relatable videos I’ve seen on this topic in YEARS. Thank you for sharing your story 💕

[@ajourneywithjordan]

That’s all we do here on this channel is honesty and transparency. So praise God you found your way on over. Thank you for being trustworthy with this special story of mine. 🤎

[@asinegaasinega]

@@ajourneywithjordan I love your kindess. You exemplify a "Christ in You the hope of glory" vibe. When we are younger (i am now in my 40s) we dont see the full picture of how God can orchestrate things but there's hope whether in a season of marriage or staying single. I love your openess. You are a witness (whether you like it or not) to the power of Jesus Christ the Lord in changing the hearts of men and women. Take the issue of sexuality out of this - just the fact that you are able to talk about this from the heart is all you need to know that you indeed is a child of the Most High. I don't say this glibly. It's the most important honor. I wish I understood this particular thing when I was younger. When we know this deep in our hearts, we start walking by faith, whether in marriage or single, whether in this profession or another, whether with wealth or poverty. As a human, we have to deep down know that we are the child of the Most High and He knows us by our name through His son the Lord Jesus

[@barbara9315]

I’m 30 and still waiting for my husband, and I’m ok to stop associating with men who only want one thing

[@Vagren]

THIS. It’s an internal struggle especially if you’re a Christian woman, and I admit I’ve battled with this too over the years. I still desire to marry, it’s been a long time dream of mine. I’m 32 now going on 33 and I’m in a relationship with a Christian man who respects me, waits for me and who has expressed his intentions of marrying me someday at the right time. We’re just taking things one day at a time so we can make the best decisions for the both of us, with God’s guidance. Thank you for sharing this, it’s humbling and comforting. 🫶

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I’m grateful you found comfort in my journey. That’s all I could have asked for. It is refreshing to hear about the path you are on and I pray that The LORD will bring you two into holy matrimony (realll soon) and that He will use your testimony to His glory.

[@zanesutherland406]

I have never dated. Grew up into a Christian household. Always had a relationship with God. Went to preschool-highschool at private Christian schools. Purity culture was terrible. In middle school I started watching porn because I was bullied some and wanted to do what the popular kids were doing. Was caught in 7th grade. My mom handled it terribly and it villainized sex and relationships more. I was wanting to save myself for marriage. A lot happened in some areas of my life. But at 22 I was feeling so stuck, stagnant, and lonely in my life. I desired physical touch so much. I went through a hoe phase and had my first sex and first kiss at 22. Including oral I was with 13 people. 4-5 of those I could have done without. It was nice to finally get to experience physically intimacy and connection, and it’s something I really enjoyed. But God had me stop that, stop watching porn, and as of a few months ago stop masturbating. It’s one of those things where ya it was less than ideal, but I wouldn’t be the person I am today and experienced everything had I not done it. Luckily no STDs etc. Made sure to pray against any soul ties etc. God works everything for good and I am rewaiting till marriage. But it is far from easy to rewait and also avoid giving into sexual desires in any way when I do have a high sex drive and do place high value on it.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you for sharing your story!

[@mariaamaka]

when u ask God for His Grace There’s nothing u can’t do, Bro👍🏽keep walking wit God

[@shoshanas5251]

Awww… I pray for you, Zane. Praying that you have the strength and wisdom to remain in His will. Your desire for someone is there and may you find your wife soon. She is there somewhere. I hope she was able to wait (and save herself) for you too.

[@zanesutherland406]

@@shoshanas5251 Thanks for the prayers! I am doing my best to follow God’s instructions etc. God has only told me one thing specifically regarding marriage. After meeting someone who was 95% at least my dream person, but a lot happened and it didn’t work out. God told me that there is a “perfect match”. That’s all He’s said about marriage for me. So am encouraged that they exist. I work on bettering myself everyday to be the best husband. I really want to provide the house before I get married, so that is my main goal and thing that needs to be accomplished before marriage. I believe that will happen soon and meeting my spouse could happen by the end of this year or next!

[@muzikveoyun37]

Thank God you chose Jesus as your savior! I hope your future wife will be someone who had sex countless times but repented, just like you did. You don't deserve to marry a virgin anyways.

[@lopa5881]

girl i feel you, especially in the bitterness and resentment part. i’ve became a christian 3ish years ago when i was 19 and i had recently started to explore my sexuality and realized i struggled w SSA. however i gave it all to God but now as the years come to pass and i see my friends who don’t have to “give up” so much as i did get marriage and partners makes me grow envious and resentful towards God. yet that has also worked to break the idol of marriage and realize that even tho our culture puts it that way, no, our ultimate goal as christians is not to get married and have kids, but to see Jesus face to face one day. sending you love from colombia❤

[@marybenoit6375]

The physical pleasure is just for a season. The hurt afterwards is terrible 🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@katshell2059]

I was 16 when the Lord told me to wait. I am almost 45 and waiting. I have felt all of what you have felt. Keep going and don’t look back. This isn’t the time to serve Satan. Choose God. He’s worth it!

[@chelseajoseph1238]

45 is soo old ,the clock is ticking ! If you continue you probably will never have kids go out there and live your life

[@barbwireb7779]

Are you mental? You clearly didn’t hear gos or he lied to you 16 and 45 is not waiting it’s a life sentence. No if god had me wait that long I would have had sex with anyone cause this is plain out mean

[@aleahcoleman1805]

Thank you for sharing. You and I are literally the same person and are enduring/have endured the same things, except I’m a little older (31 going on 32). Just when I think I’m gonna pull a Sarah and Abraham move and go outside of God’s will to get the promise, it’s like his hand has gripped me so tight that he keeps me separated out of his love and protection for me ha. That’s God for you! We are not alone that’s for sure. We just gotta wait on him! 🙏🏾 ❤

[@ajourneywithjordan]

It is comments, TESTIMONIES, like thesw that remind me why I birthed this channel. As I said in the video, I don’t have much, if any, encouragement except for you, my sister in Christ to know that you are NEVER alone. Remember His promises (whatever they may be in your life) are “yes” and “amen”. You’ve got this and God’s got you. Thank you for watching, but more than that, thank you for sharing and helping me to know that there are others who share in this unique journey.

[@idgee3774]

You have a very warm presence. Thank you for your honesty. 💌

[@ajourneywithjordan]

What a sweet compliment. Thank you so much for watching!

[@oshinofalakoju5749]

Girl, wow. Recently going through a break up and I'm abstaining during this time intentionally. I'm leaning on God HEAVILY because I know that my flesh is weak and I've leaned into that but I'm realizing that I want to lean into God this season. He will grant us the desires of our hearts when He is done equipping us with the tools we need. Self control is a fruit of the spirit that is one of the hardest ones to put in practice, it's pivotal in this life. Each day is a journey, so this is a personal walk. It is well in Jesus name. Happy to have found community on this video. God bless you Jordan!! We got this bookie.

[@broco6608]

As an older Christian who's had years of celibacy there are things we must do when it comes to sexual passions. The main thing is to RUN - from sensual music, movies, videos, people, dates, etc. The second thing is learning to process your emotions by the Spirit. Third, capture and cast down thoughts that go against the Word of God and replace them with the Word of God. Fourth, don't be idle. Fifth, develop the habit of going to the Word and prayer everytime the desires creep up. Stay there until the desires go away.

[@rashaunellis1339]

This is the life to live. It’s simple, but it’s hard, but it feels good to try and fight for something for the betterment of myself…

[@broco6608]

​@@rashaunellis1339You won't regret it.

[@jaywatson6261]

As one older Christian to another. That's excellent advice and so on point! 🙏🏾

[@djq4005]

This is an honest conversation that the church really needed to have. Thank you so much for sharing

[@isawxvy]

Agreed, great video. God doesn't promise marriage. A lot of people have the mentality of " God will send me my wife or God will send me my husband." In reality you have to do the work to find someone that's equally yoked. God is not going to drop someone out of thin air for you to marry. With the knowledge you gain from the bible you have all what you need to choose the right partner. That's why a lot of Christian folks are depressed these days and single, because they have the mentality of God is just going to send me someone. Go out and meet Christian people who value the same things as you and only then will you find someone you can marry and be happy which. We got to understand this.

[@originalceo]

@isawxvy exactly 💯💯💯 too many Xtians waiting passively, and not using time to get to grips with arming themselves with knowledge and wisdom and preparing to actually be married successfully. Granted keeping celibate in the wait is very tough but I wish more of us who are /were virgins would not be so lackadaisical about it. Glad you figured it out, it took me some years into my marriage to figure that out 😅😅😅

[@luyandadladla9416]

Thank you for being brave and sharing. I once took the same vow and then messed up with a guy in my varsity years. Now I am celibate again and yeah it's a tough road. I'm just encouraged that those of us trying to honor God with our bodies are not alone. Thanks Jordan ❤

[@ajourneywithjordan]

God bless you!

[@key2q]

I hardly ever comment on KZbin but your video really moved me. Thanks for your vulnerability. I wish I could encourage you but you honestly encouraged me. I am a married woman who is very happy in the gift of marriage. But this I know- blessings come with obedience. Your obedience has brought you the gift of closeness with God. And I was blessed listening to you today. I pray that God grants you the desires of your heart. May God always grant you the gift of Himself no matter which circumstance we are in- whether single or married. Blessings to you, my sister in Christ.

[@Poodle_Gun]

This isn't a blessing. Me and my friends who have waited absolutely regret it 100% and would not do this again if we could start over.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you for a tremendously BEAUTIFUL comment. I don’t think about the “gift of closeness to God” as often as I should, and thinking on it now, that really has been a gift in my life. Thank you Jesus! I’m not really holding on to the hope of marriage anymore, but I am trusting that God’s strength will keep me sane on this difficult journey.

[@cassandrasimon8943]

This is so powerful!! Love the vulnerability. God bless you!

[@ms_happyRadebe]

Thank you sis for this 🥺♥️thank you for your honesty and vulnerability. You have articulated what I’m going through, the feelings I have , the thoughts in my head so accurately 🥹 this felt like a warm 🫂 thank you so much♥️

[@ajourneywithjordan]

This has been one of my FAVORITE responses to read. “A warm hug”. I love that! You’re welcome. May you find strength, hope, and peace in God’s love toward you.

[@croyfox]

Much respect for sharing - this has good thoughts and was a good breakdown. Definitely comforting to know others think so deeply about the ups and downs of being God's children and being a human in the world. Biggest lesson I'll be reflecting on the idea of marriage being a gift rather than a promise.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Firstly, thank you for watching the video. Marriage may be a promise to you, specifically in the life God has designed for you, but the point I was driving home in the video is that marriage is not a promise to every believer. Don’t be discouraged by anything I said, but instead be encouraged to seek God and His will for you.

[@MsRockstar013]

This is so real and I appreciate your authenticity in this. Thank you for your honesty. I'm 26 and I've had to deal with this too. Recently I've been asking myself the question: "If I never get married in life, will I be upset with God?" There are days when I feel like I can absolutely live a fulfilling life without marriage. Then there are days when society, and the church, and my hormones all convince me that I couldn't do it! I have to take it a day at a time and confess honestly how I feel to God and put my hope in Him to be everything I need.

[@okuhleqasana830]

Here from the To My Sisters podcast❤️❤️❤️thank you for sharing your experience Jordan! Trust me, many of us feel the same way.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Do you have a link to your podcast? Thank you for watching!

[@samuelnieves1752]

I’m a young man and a believer, all I can say is yeah… It’s not easy. The choice to obey God is always muddied when you see the world around you move in the complete opposite direction. Then there’s the issues of falling in temptation then repenting. Then it happens again after a few months and it’s shameful and disappointing so you gotta repent again. But we’re still here and I know my God is good, so ima keep trying and hoping I’m blessed with a wife or the want for a wife leaves my heart. Great vid sister these are for you 💐

[@mariaamaka]

God will grant ur heart❤desires Bro. He never disappoints those who put thier trust in Him 🙏🏽

[@ApostleChris0]

Your testimony has moved me and I appreciate your transparency ❤️⌛️🆙🙏🏾

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you for the kind words and for taking the time to watch!

[@Lawyerbaejess]

No, God does not promise marriage. But, some people have been blessed with the gift of singleness. Paul speaks on it in 1 Corinthian 7:7. If you are not blessed with that gift, then it means that God desires marriage for you, but he never said the time frame or the health of that marriage either. Also, it is important to focus on God’s purpose for your life and fulfillment in your single season so when your husband finds you, he finds a whole and complete person. Just like anything else in life, God isn’t going to give us something we aren’t ready for or that will destroy us because its before its time. But, if you truly believe that man of God will come relieve yourself of that burden of time and go be free in Christ and enjoy the time with him, while it can be just you and him.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you for your comment and God bless you. You laid it out very well. While, I won't dive into the specifics regarding my personal desires for marriage or singleness, I think your comment will bless a lot of readers. The concept of being a "whole person" does carry some weight, but if truth be told not many reach a place of wholeness or complete healing prior to receiving gifts like that of marriage and children. I wanted to add that so that someone reading does not fall into hopelessness because somehow they have not reached an arbitrary pinnacle of "wholeness". God's grace is sufficient- Amen.

[@barbwireb7779]

41 still not married. God is too late. And I’m not going to wait either or stay celibate

[@12militarystyle]

This was such a blessing. Thank you for your willingness to put something so personal out here. God is using you to bless others like myself. ❤

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you for the sweet comment! God bless you.

[@jewele1029]

Thank you for this so very much! I'm on the other end of the age spectrum for marriage, I'm 16 lol. I've always found it nice to be alone as i've been introverted my entire life, but my desire and goal for marriage has always been there. But now i'm starting to see that this goal i have for marriage isn't a promise to me, even though the church emphasizes so much on us waiting for marriage, giving our virginities to our husbands, and be amazing wives. It gives a lot of us pretty lopsided views on what God wills for us individually, and whether those views we've been conditioned to want will actually happen. I've been awakened to this reality, and at this age it's EXTREMELY difficult, but i'm hanging on.❤

[@lola_la_cava]

I'm 16 too!! yes, at this age it's EXTREMELY HARD. my problem is that I got truly converted just some months ago and I've been already seeing people and sex the wrong way for all the time I've been away from the Lord. so it's being really difficult to change my mind completely, but I trust he gives me the strength. my main weakness is lust, lately I've been sinning, feeling awful right after, but then sinning again after some days or weeks. I also used to doubt all the time that I should wait til marriage and if it was really worth it. being 16 is really hard. but I trust Him with all my heart and I believe He is always with me and always teaching me a lot through these tough situations.

[@achandler3544]

Don’t completely give up on your hopes, remember, God knows the desires of our hearts and has plans to prosper us, not harm us. He would not have put the desire for marriage in your heart if He did not have plans to fulfill it💙

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I don’t want you to feel as though God will not bless you with marriage. That was not the point I wanted to drive home in the video. Rather, I wanted us to consider the “why” behind the things we say we’re doing for The LORD. Be encouraged, God’s plans for you will surely outweigh what you could imagine.

[@tybeewiththetea1846]

Hey girly! So I am glad you shared this because a lot of people struggle with this. You brought up some really good points that I want piggy back off of. One thing you talked about is the heart posture. There are so many times throughout the Bibe where it talks about how people look at the outer appearance but God’s looks at the heart. With anything we do whether it’s tithing, going to church, serving, preaching, teaching, abstaining from sex God is going to look at the inside. Why we do what we do is never about us but it’s about God getting the glory, the upbuilding of his kingdom. We are meant to look set apart because we are representation of God. So, also when people say “that’s great” and they “still do what they do,” you are still being a light in their lives through that. So, we never know how God can reach other people through us! But what we do know is all things are working together for good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose. Not our own. Another thing I want to say is forgive yourself. When you have decide to repent from pornography, which means turn away from it and turn to God, DO NOT hold on to what you should have done differently. You cannot change it. I will say when you have the urge pray, get into the word, serve. And give yourself grace as He delivers you from it. God is a deliverer but you have to bring it to Him will a humble heart and have faith that he CAN do it. And like you said get you someone to keep you accountable and that can pray for you when you’re weak. I have a lot more to say lol but I am so happy you shared this! P.S: I am a virgin too at 23 years old

[@Poodle_Gun]

You're very young

[@shoshanas5251]

So much wisdom at 23 ❤

[@gracefullyrachel6573]

Why was I thinking about this topic the other day and I see this? Whew…. and thank you for your transparency sis! Needed to hear this

[@ajourneywithjordan]

You’re welcome. Thank you for being a trusted space to share this story with. Whatever the reason this topic was placed on your heart the other day, I’m beyond glad you found this video. I pray it was helpful.

[@alexdex9439]

You certainly ain't alone sis! Thank you for your story. There's so much that I relate to. I can see that you're having the time of it like myself so I'll pray for you my sister and may God bless you for your honesty, bravery and kind heart for sharing your story.

[@ajc1233]

I'm Muslim and I'm also following a similar path as you. Im 25, but i still live with family and personally I don't really desire to live alone beacuse i know i will be lonely plus financially i live in an expensive area. Your honesty was refreshing. I personally never made a firm deicion to be a virgin at a young age, but i was firm on the belief that u dont give yourself away to just anyone. Thats been my belief and i thought nothing of it. As i got older, my deicion became more firm to loose my virginity to my husband but i think i really was okay with this decision and it became a knowing within me at around 20 backed with more than relgion as for my reasons. I'm truly happy and not angry with anyone. I have brothers, and family who lives their lives different then me. I also never felt any jelousy. I know marriage is a gift, but so is everything, like breathing air to sustain our bodies. Staying thankful and blessed is difficult. And im not perfect i have also stuggled with temptation of the heart where purity is concerned. I accept I'm not perfect but strive to be better everyday for myself and Allah(swt). Your video you made was a gift to others so thank you.

[@user-xq2ew9yy1x]

Jesus Christ loves you and died for you accept him and will be greater and stonger and most of all you will have eternal life with him.

[@ajc1233]

@@user-xq2ew9yy1x Thank you for wishing the best for me. I appreciate it.

[@ashleygarrett4087]

This is VERY relevant for me at this point in time of my life. Thank you for sharing this 🙏

[@ajourneywithjordan]

That’s a blessing to hear! You’re welcome.

[@robertjackson8790]

Man Sis, thank you. When you said “marriage is not a promise” the changes so much. It also helps my posture

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I’m working on my heads posture as well! Thanks for watching the video.

[@afosplace5885]

woohoo, it's amazing to see that in this journey of faith we are not alone. am happy to see that there are a lot of people keeping themselves. my first time on your channel and I was blessed and encouraged. I pray for more grace in Jesus name Amen.

[@theycallmetrice]

Hey Jordan! Your experience is so relatable. In my experience, the church put a lot of pressure on girls to make this decision. I look back and know that I wouldn’t have made the same decision for the same reasons you’ve stated. I was too young and naive to make promises to God of this magnitude lol. Now that I’m older, I too have stuck with my decision and know that it was the right decision to make. Over the years, the Lord has truly shown me grace and kindness in my mistakes and rebellion. The desire for marriage is strong and my resolve to wait has grown stronger as well. It hasn’t gotten easier but God has definitely made his presence and strength known throughout the journey.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Hey Trice! It’s been a long time since I’ve seen your face. Thank you for watching and thank you so much for sharing a snippet of your journey thus far. I can attest that it, TRULY has not gotten easier but somehow God keeps revealing new levels to His strength and faithfulness to us.

[@theycallmetrice]

@@ajourneywithjordan It really has been a good minute lol. I don’t really believe in coincidences so God knew what he was doing when this video popped up on my KZbin feed. I didn’t know you had a channel but I’m subscribed now.

[@angelmcgavock]

Thank you for keeping it real❤ It's great hearing someone else talk about this.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I’m very glad it blessed you in some way. 🙏🏽

[@carameldarling2980]

Jordan, I feel like I am watching myself. You have articulated this topic so beautifully. I am also a virgin at 26 and I could honestly write a book (and probably should since I am a writer) about all the experiences, thoughts and feelings I have grappled with as it pertains to waiting for marriage. I have experienced many disappointments in my life, but this one has been a particular type of disappointment filled with the pain, anger, sadness, confusion and resentment of unmet expectations. It's a lot of long years having to sit with yourself and wonder why. Why is this happening for everyone but me? Am I not worthy of love? I've listened to too many people offering up the "blueprint" to finding the one and being hoodwinked into thinking God is withholding this from me because I'm not doing xy and z. As if I could twist God's hand with my performative actions to get what I want. I've come full circle with this, although it is still difficult and I experience ups and downs in my emotions depending on the season I'm in. I have concluded that life is not linear. God causes the sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and the unjust. The gift of marriage is not reserved just for those who had the discipline to wait until marriage. Blessings happen to both believers and unbelievers. That is God's mercy. We are all on our journeys and there is no cookie cutter way of living this life. Marriage can be a gift, a promise and also a calling. As we see time and time again in the Word, callings of the God are never smooth sailing. They are always met with trials, tribulations and times of testing. I am comforted by the fact that I have avoided a lot of problems and heartache during the wait. I am also comforted in the tears of a praying Hannah who desired a child so much she was brought to a deep place of pain, but the Lord was faithful. One thing we can learn from Hannah is changing the reason why you desire the thing. Once she changed her desire from something that would please her to something that would please and glorify God, she became at peace and the Lord answered her prayer. And lastly, I am comforted in knowing this is a shared experience with many other people and that I am not alone. I am jumping on this journey with you, and hope to see what the Lord has in store for you in this area of your life. Be blessed🙏

[@ajourneywithjordan]

You don’t know how much reading this blessed me. I could say a mouthful but I already did in the video. 🤣 My desire for marriage will never leave I fear but my acceptance of singleness is beginning to grow in a way I never thought it would or could. I’m hoping it won’t always hurt to mourn the life I hoped, but if it does I hope more joy will abound and that more peace (in knowing I’m honoring The LORD in this way) will increase as well. I pray God blesses you beyond your wildest dreams and I’m glad that our paths crossed (even if virtually).

[@carameldarling2980]

@@ajourneywithjordan My dear sister, I speak from my heart when I say you have a poetic way with your words. Your transparency and vulnerability is courageous (it would take so much for me to be this bold😂). But honestly, I think you should continue to these open and honest videos because it is severely lacking in the Christian space. I know it has and will continue to provide healing and freedom to many, including yourself by the grace of God. My desire for marriage will never cease as well. The thought of being content with a life of singleness is heart wrenching for me to fathom. I have never understood “counting the cost” of following Christ as much as I do at this point in my life. Like you, I pray that the weeping and mourning will endure only for a season and the joy of the Lord will continue to be our strength! I’m so glad I got to have this interaction with you🥰 God bless you and I’ll be keeping you in prayers 🙏🏽❤️

[@Helga38965]

Thank you for sharing your story. I'm 30 and although it's not easy, what encourages me is remembering that the reason for being pure is to honour God.

[@bigbangengineer7686]

Your so brave and blessed for this. Great testimony! Hope to see more from this channel 😊

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you so much! Make sure to subscribe and you’ll be seeing plenty of me.

[@yvette3636]

I lost my virginity at 12 but I had been molested from age 8. I now have a 12 yo who wants a crush, a boy to like her, I cringe on the inside because I know the damage and guilt I had as a teenager. I don’t want her to sleep with a boy before marriage. I was married at 19 divorced at 33 and remarried at 38. I tell my daughter everyone prior to her dad was a waste of time. Hearing your story and all that you went through was eye opening. Someone like me who was introduced to sex at a young age I went through all of that and more. I suffered so much, because of what was done and the bad choices I made most of my life. Everyone chooses a path and I’m thankful that our roads has led to God. I worked with a 38 yo virgin she got married and had a baby immediately. If it’s meant it’s going to happen. I pray God gives you strength to continue your journey.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

God bless you! And thank you for sharing some of your story. It blessed me deeply.

[@leilou19]

I think it's great that you are a virgin. I'm glad you addressed the " if you do this, you'll get this" that the people in church say and the reality of purity.

[@opticalraven1935]

Too many churches believe that God is transactional and treat our relationship with Him as a "you scratch my back, I scratch your back".

[@user-bd3ou1xu9r]

i relate with you 1000% because nothing anyone says ever makes me feel good because it feels like I'm alone on this journey. I don't know enough people like me. This video has taught me one thing: I AM NOT ALONE

[@je39981]

This video is life changing for plenty. We've made decisions that we wish we can turn the time on. I pray that the pain or the lingering pain and regret you all are feeling is healed by the name of Jesus Christ. I've made decisions that I've regretted and it took almost 3 years to fully heal. I was listening to the sermon in church today and the pastor shared that "Before God changes your circumstance he has to change your mind". God is a healer and I am a living testimony because my soul was lost and I was far away from Jesus. However, he saved my soul from the depths of sin. I re-dedicated my life to Christ and I am saved. The enemy tries to remind me of my past but I am reminded that I am not the product of my past mistakes. It's not easy but everyday is a step.

[@naomilockhart8491]

Thank you for your transparency and I hope that it creates a safe space for others who are on the same or similar journeys. ❤

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I hope it does to. There’s been a LOT of conversation…. To say the least.

[@victoriamateo6624]

This is truly admirable and i believe that the Lord is pleased with you -- itś not easy but it really takes a strong foundation, self-discipline, and self-control,. God bless you women of God!

[@vanmabande8479]

You’ve saved yourself from a whole lot of trouble out here. You better trust that! All the very best.

[@kimberlyperry8088]

Thank you for this content! Ive definitely held on to my virginity until meeting my fiance in my late 20's. I do not regret only being intimate with one man, you ask yourself what youre missing out on and it's nothing. It is the true discipline God gives us to wait on His timing. Thank you for your vulnerability and transparency of your experience. You are definitely not alone!

[@barbwireb7779]

Not missing out???? So it’s not nice and pleasurable? That’s the reason you could be virgin cause you’re libido is low

[@ShaniaBell]

“They’ve done a terrible job” 😂 you’re so real and so sweet

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I was trying to be as honest and as polite as possible. 😂 thank you so much for watching. 🙏🏽

[@christaddictajinpursuitofp2545]

Thank you for your transparency. Appreciated the perspective. Praying that you receive every good gift the Lord has for you. Be blesssed!

[@ajourneywithjordan]

God bless you!

[@_zishio]

Youre very warm and easy to listen to, i love the way you speak😊

[@sandiswamjikwa2991]

May the Good Lord bless you sis , God is wonderful because I am currently going through everything you spoke on and this was comforting.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

To be honest, reading through the comments, He already has. I'm not sure what awaits in my future, but to read the stories of everyone under this video, people who are believing and trusting the One, TRUE God, is blessing enough. I'm grateful you found comfort in the message, and remember The LORD delights in you and desires to be everything you need (i.e. strength, friend, wonderful counselor).

[@notjillscott7418]

Thank you for this video. Based on the comments alone, I can see that by you sharing your story, many others feel heard and seen. I commend you on your vulnerability and pray God continues to work in your life. 🙏🏽 ❤ Be blessed Beauty

[@ajourneywithjordan]

God bless you!

[@jayceeharrisii5956]

This was awesome. I relate so much with what you've said. Thank you

[@Anyila87]

Thank you for sharing Jordan. The algorithm brought me here and I'm glad that it did. I resonate a lot with your experience. I am a 33 y/o virgin and face a lot of the regrets you do. I blame it a lot on purity culture, wrong biblical doctrine and a lack of education on our bodies and how hormones work. Like you, I was violated when I was exposed to pornography at age 15 which led to a decades long battle to break free. Purity culture made it seem like being a virgin or saving yourself for marriage was worth being rewarded with a husband even when the bible does not hold any such promise, hence wrong biblical doctrine. Being uneducated on hormones, cycles, ovulation etc set me up for failure when battling lust because I thought that there was something wrong with me when my body was functioning as God created it to. And you are right, married people do give Christian singles the wrong kind of encoragement when they have not experienced the deep lonliness we do, the unfulfilled longings we have especially as the years go by and there are no prospects in sight. Thee church does not help too. My experience in church has that it shuns singles and centres a lot on married Christians, families etc. It can be so isolating

[@LaurenCarducci]

Your honesty is really beautiful ❤

[@ajourneywithjordan]

I certainly appreciate you saying that. Thank you!

[@Dodderyfeline31]

I know you don’t feel it, but being pure as you are is a beautiful thing. I did not lose my virginity until after I was a Christian and it absolutely ruined me to think that I let go of a beautiful gift from God for a few moments of pleasure with a woman I probably will not see again on this side of eternity. There are mental and physical things that come with it that tormented me for a very long time afterwards. When I left my ex it was the worst thing I had ever experienced up until that point. Trust me, I know it sucks, but the other side is so much worse and so broken. Keep going, it’s worth it.

[@Poodle_Gun]

It's not a gift. It's a f-cking nightmare every single day. You're giving up everything for nothing. Every part of your life ties back to this: marriage, children, job, friendships, church experience, ability to focus: significantly worse than if you just sin a little and ask for forgiveness later. I eventually did have teh secks in an abusive marriage that I fled from where my life was in danger. It was slightly worse than waiting. Sex wasn't exhilarating, it made me feel normal. I could finally live a normal life in normal society and not have to worry about this.

[@user-vl7fm8ck2m]

Poodle_Gun I'll pray for your deliverance and for the Holy Spirit to guide you❤

[@r.walker7986]

Its not a big deal. most all sex is mid. many married people dont have sex and have horrible sex. Your torment is the biproduct of what you choose to believe. This is why purity culture is destructive, it places too much emphasis on sex as if its some mortal sin or murder when its not more of a sin than jealousy, or saying bad words... Forgive yourself and build a less harmful relationship t your faith. God forgives, no matter what so why are you beating yourself up?

[@Dodderyfeline31]

@r.walker7896 actually, I don’t beat myself up about it. I am talking about the psychological baggage that comes with having sex with someone, bonding emotionally, spiritually and physically and then breaking that bond. It hurts and it takes a long time to recover from. Sex is a very sacred thing and there is a reason scripture protects it. If I knew what I know now when I was virgin, I would have stayed that way.

[@r.walker7986]

@@Dodderyfeline31 The belief that its baggage instead of the side effects of a basic broken heart is where the beating yourself comes from. A break up is hard if you really cared, having had sex with them does not make it any harder than not having had sex with them would make it easier.

[@joyannacarlisle2562]

This is awesome 👏🏾 it really is better to wait!

[@kiddanger11]

Thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom of GOD'S word. Much needed conversation in today's church.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Hopefully, one day we can have these conversations correctly.

[@kayeononyeka]

Thank you so much for sharing. As a virgin in my 30s I can relate with your experience and prior misconceptions

[@Xx.bygracethrufaith]

I love this vid

[@terristrange]

Deep conversation. Purity goes way beyond our physical choices. It’s in our heart.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you so much for watching. 😊

[@Kholmi.28]

This is very much a relatable video. Thank you for sharing.

[@TheNathanael315]

I'm a 25 year old Christian man who has "saved" himself for marriage. I know it was the Lord who kept my purity. However, I also wrestle with the issues you've faced. As a male in the church I'm at a statistical advantage to get marriage, yet I'm still seeking the Lord for a spouse out of all the 'options'. I am also learning to trust the Lord more and not attach my worth to getting these the earthly blessings that aren't promised. Seeing a woman of God as open and sincere as yourself is awesome. I pray that the promises ofMatt 6:33 are added to your life.

[@punkstudios9955]

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Though Im sure you know this already God may not promise marriage but if that is what you desire and you pray to God for it you must have faith that he will give you that gift! It just does not ever happen when you want it to but it will happen as long as you continue on the path you are on. You seem like someone who is doing everything you know to do for God so I know he will answer your prayers on his time. Also you are very self aware of the times you stray away from God but just know that God loves you still and everyone has moments of bitterness and loss of faith. Keep serving God, loving God, having faith in God, and praying to God and he will bless you that is a fact! You got this!💯

[@twhite3850]

Jesus Bless you, my sister! I pray to God that my close relative will follow through like you have.

[@rob93holloway]

I don't usually comment on videos, but I must say, this is one of the most genuine Christian perspectives I've ever seen. You openly shared your personal struggles while staying true to reality. Although Christ is sufficient, we all grapple with desires for security, intimacy, and affection from others. It's a common misconception that remaining celibate guarantees God will provide a spouse - a notion unsupported by the Bible, as you rightly pointed out. Some individuals, who held onto their virginity for a long time, may find it challenging to embrace a healthy view of sex after marriage due to ingrained beliefs. As Christians, acknowledging the imperfections of our fallen world is crucial, realizing that certain aspects of life may not align with the ideal, especially this side of heaven. Whether single, in a relationship, or married, embracing and appreciating our current life stage is essential. I value this video and look forward to hearing more of your perspectives.

[@thethrowbackguy4319]

Wow. Thanks Jordan! God bless you

[@ajourneywithjordan]

God bless YOU. Thank you so much for watching.

[@tomeikia8372]

I appreciate this video. Keep walking in truth sister. 💕

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you!

[@m.l.2483]

Jordan, please be encouraged. God is with you and any sacrifice you make for Him is 100% worth it. Emily Wilson has content you might relate to; she's a Christian (Catholic) who saved herself for marriage and experienced heartbreak and rejection along her journey.

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Thank you so much for the suggestion. I’m going to bookmark her and maybe I’ll find some new encouragement as well.

[@Elizabeth-vb4qv]

As an eighteen year old I can totally relate to all your struggles, especially when it comes to choosing God in this crazy world 🫂🫂🫂I appreciate you for coming out like this, this just motivated me to keep standing regardless if im Going to get married or not💕🫂🫂 at the end Christ is to be glorified🙏

[@ajourneywithjordan]

May Christ be glorified! And I DO hope The LORD has a spouse for you one day.

[@obinnaanthonyezike]

Just checked your channel from just getting under 100 views to this video currently over 20k veiws 🤯🤯🤯 it just has to be a sign Go girl, you are absolutely stunning 😊 and trust me when i say this JOY IS COMING Just subscribed ❤

[@ajourneywithjordan]

Look, it has BLOWN MY MIND what The LORD has done in a span of 4 days. I just hope I steward it well.