I Survived A Workplace Bully!

I'm repeating the release of this video made in 2019 because the workplace bullies are still allowed to exist and because maybe what I had to say here might just help someone else experiencing the same thing I did. And maybe just letting them know that they are not the only person this sort of thing happens to might give them some solace.
It was a few years ago that I released this video and, to this day, I still receive messages from viewers who have researched about a bully in the workplace and come across my video AND commented so nicely to me about what I had to say that I felt the need to share the video again. This sort of workplace harrassment and hostility continues on to this day. Why? While it's true that not everyone will get along all the time, why are workplace bullies allowed to perpetuate and make a work environment so unbearable?
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** This video is not intended for children under the age of 13 **
Deb's email address: [e-mail]

[@karlsoffthegrid1378]

“There’s no greater work than the work done within the walls of your own home.” You made the right choice. Life is too short to put up with the foolishness of others. You’re blessed with the loving husband now go out and enjoy life.😊

[@DebsWay]

Oh, I am, Karl! William & I are enjoying our retirement for sure!! Take care now!

[@mishalea]

What a nightmare. Such a narcissist she was. Having to work in a hostile environment daily is a terrible way to live. I cant believe they didn't get rid of her when the first lady was going to quit because of her. Then a second chance with you. She should have been fired from the start. Glad you are content now. God bless ya, Deb. 💖

[@DebsWay]

And, actually, Misha -- there were others before the both of us that "C" preyed upon. We weren't her only victims. She told us all about them, too. Life is really so good now but that wasn't the way I would've liked to have ended my working career.

[@kimsinspiredlife]

This is a sad and unfortunate story. Sad because it happens every day in workplaces everywhere and people are allowed to get away with their actions that hurt others. I’ve seen it first hand and to this day don’t understand it. You’re a smart woman.

[@DebsWay]

I really hated to end my working career this way and I felt like a failure in some way BUT I know very well that it wasn't ME who caused the workplace hostilities. This video was actually made about 5 years ago and just a couple of months after I quit working at the clinic. I have been contacted by so many people over the last few years who have viewed my video and could relate to what I was saying that I felt maybe I should release it again. I think it helps others who are experiencing this same thing to know that they are not alone. Thanks for watching! Take care now!!

[@lynnshepard7485]

I’m so very sorry you went through this, Deb. Something I discovered in 42 years of banking is that bullies often intimidate HR and their own bosses. Despite the fact that I live in an at-will state, we weren’t allowed to fire most of them, no matter the number of complaints and/or documentation. HR was always afraid of lawsuits. Such a shame. I retired early due to a bully who was moved to my building and had ties to the CEO and the Chairman of the Board. She didn’t report to me, but to the CEO. I was the COO/Executive Vice President; she did me in anyway. I prayed about it (and for her and for my attitude) and I finally decided that I just didn’t want to deal with it. I am much happier now. Still, though,after 10 years of retirement, I still miss my career and the many wonderful people with whom I worked.

[@DebsWay]

Oh, Lynn, I can so relate to what you have shared with me here. I am very happy in my retirement now but I sure hated myself for ending my working career in such a way as I did but I did what I felt was best for me. Take care now! Life is Good!!

[@lynnshepard7485]

@@DebsWay Removing oneself from toxic environments is as important as removing oneself from toxic relationships. Life is too short to spend it in situations like that which cause so much misery. I was fortunate that my finances allowed me to find a happier, more peaceful existence. Many don’t have that luxury and my heart breaks for them. I’m happy you got out! Never regret doing what’s best for yourself, your family, and your health. 😘

[@DebsWay]

You said it perfectly.

[@corinaromero6949]

Wow....there are more people dealing with work place bullying than you can imagine

[@DebsWay]

That is so true! I have been amazed with the number of people who have gotten in contact with me because they saw this video and could relate to things I talked about.

[@sewlovelywithgrace]

Oh Deb, I think nice people like you are targets. I was targeted and quit a job because of a controlling bully. I'm so sorry this happened to you. It's such a shame because you really loved what you were doing and then someone comes along to ruin it. It's not the job that causes stress, it's the people. Coworkers can make or break a job. It's so common these days and HR usually sides with the bully. Thanks for sharing Deb.

[@DebsWay]

You summed it up correctly, Grace -- HR just doesn't know how to handle such situations. What bothered me the most for so long was that I ended my working career this way. BUT, I am enjoying my retirement now and life is good!!

[@sewlovelywithgrace]

@@DebsWay They lost an awesome employee when they lost you. I'm glad life is good now for you. Enjoy each day of good health and doing what you love! ❤

[@DebsWay]

Well, I don't know if I'd claim that I was "awesome" but I did my job well and I enjoyed working in the clinic. Now, I thoroughly enjoy my life in retirement! Life is good and I am happy and content. God Is Good!!!

[@over50andfantabulous59]

I have been there. It was so bad that I used some of my vacation days to recover from it. I greatly appreciate you sharing this with us because many think they are alone. ~~Sis Lynn

[@DebsWay]

Hi Lynn! I'm so sorry to hear that this sort of thing happened to you, too. It seems that this sort of thing happens a lot (Too Much) in the workplace anymore. I sure don't remember such treatment in the offices I worked in at the beginning of my working career but this was how I ended my working career. Hope all is well with you these days! God Bless!

[@Deendougretired]

I’m sitting here listening to you, and there is so many things I could relate to in this life story of yours

[@DebsWay]

I tell ya', this was quite an experience for me and not one I ever wish to duplicate in any way!

[@Deendougretired]

Good evening, Deb this sounds like it’s going to be a very interesting conversation

[@socarole66]

Oh Deb, my heart does out to you and I don't think there is one person out there that doesn't relate to your story. I know I do and have experienced several things in my working life that should never have happened but they did and I'm still here, I'm ok. The office place of the 80's and 90's was a very different place to now! The problem lies with the management for sure, just because you have a title of Manager it doesn't mean you know how to deal with people and that lady needs help, the problem being is that they are scared of doing it for fear of a claim against them. Hubby is an HR Director for a Global bank so deals with this kind of thing all the time, he would have treated you better I'm know❤ This office just used the likes of you lovely lady to take the brunt of her issues, now it will move on to some other poor person. This experience has made you stronger and look at you, you've been able to tell so many people your story and you will help other people realise the situation they may be in. Everything happens for a reason, I'm a firm believer in that. You know you were innocent in all this and so do we. Hopefully now you have spoken about this you can move on and not give that woman any more of your time and energy. ❤❤xx

[@DebsWay]

Thanks, Carole! I originally posted this video about 5 years ago and just a few months after I left Advent Health. Over the past few years, I have been contacted by viewers who tell me that my video was so helpful to them. I think it helps others in just knowing that this same treatment happens not only to them but many others as well. So I decided to re-post this video in hopes that it reaches others going through the same treatment that I was. It did take me a while to move on, as you say. because I felt so bad that I had ended my work career in this manner BUT life goes on; life is good; and I am very content in my retirement these days. My life has been blessed in so many ways! You take care now!!

[@suzettesingson1002]

So sorry you had to deal with a nasty co worker. In my career, it was management that were the bullies. I took early retirement because of it at my place of work. It ruined my thoughts of ever having a boss again.

[@DebsWay]

Thank you for sharing your work experience. I think some of what triggers a bullies action is that somehow bullying others makes them feel good about themselves. Sad to say... You take care now!

[@suzettesingson1002]

@@DebsWay exactly right! I’m happy you are out of that place now!

[@Deendougretired]

I’m sitting here listening and I’m saying to myself there is nothing worse than having a really crappy coworker

[@DebsWay]

Especially if you have to sit side-by-side with that particular co-worker every day!!

[@Deendougretired]

@@DebsWay I know exactly what you’re saying

[@DebsWay]

So true!

[@KatInTheNorth]

I’m so sorry this happened to you Deb. I really understand because something quite similar happened to me, and I left as well. It was terrible, and it still upsets me. Thank you for sharing this important message, and on another note, I really love your blouse! God Bless!

[@DebsWay]

This video was originally posted about 5 years ago but I still hate how I left my working careerl I enjoyed the work and most of the other people there but I feel that I did what was best for mel Life is Good and I am So Blessed!!

[@Deendougretired]

This happened to my sister, the one that’s living in Florida, but when she was living in Long Island, she was working in a lab a medical lab drawing blood. One of the girls didn’t like her and bullied. My sister really bad. My sister press charges and now they’re going to court because the woman lost her job. Of course my sister kept her job. And now depositions are happening over the phone because my sister is not living in Long Island anymore, but it looks like my sister will win out because other people stepped up to the plate and said this girl was terrible to not only my sister, but to other coworkers and she wasn’t even a manager, so it goes to show you that stuff is out there and it’s at times . But then my sister left and moved to Florida, but some of the things happen to me at a job. I was with for 10 years and when I tell you the stuff I put up with and I had no choice I was making good money to put my daughter through, I wanted to pay off my house can’t even begin to the things I went through this conversation. And thank God that you’re able to stay home and you do have a beautiful home and a loving husband and a cutie pie of a little puppy, but it just goes to show you. They’re all workplace bullies and for some reason they continue to work there anyway I’ve rambled through this whole entire video, but I appreciate it and I thank you for letting us know what was going on with you. Anyway, I hope you have a great night. We’re getting storms over here as well. Take it easy Deb you’re a good woman. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. That’s all.❤❤

[@DebsWay]

It happens way too often! Way Too Often!! I have always hated the fact though that I ended my working career in this way. But I feel I did what was best for me. I am enjoying my life in retirement; I am content with my life; I am happy!

[@Deendougretired]

Wow, you couldn’t leave your house you were that threatened by this woman I am sitting here in amazement. William was right not to go back, but I’m still listening to the story.

[@DebsWay]

She was very hostile and I believe it was just that I didn't feel up to dealing with her antics any longer.

[@JudyandSpirit]

Sorry you had to deal with such a bully. It's good to bring it out in the open. It happens a lot and seems like most don't say anything about it. Great topic and I hope it helps somebody else. Thank you Deb take care and stay happy

[@DebsWay]

That's exactly the reason for my re-posting this video. I still receive feedback every now & then from someone who says they got a lot of help from what I had to say. I thought I could reach even more people by re-posting about my experience. Sad to say that there are such bullies everywhere.

[@RandWFarmstead-TonyWalsh]

Well hallo Ms. Deb, good to see you my friend. We have a couple at work and its fun getting to watch them when they get their chops busted. Thanks for sharing and hope y'all have a blessed weekend my friend.

[@DebsWay]

I sure don't regret leaving that job but I hated ending my working career in such a way. BUT life is good; I'm enjoying my retirement; and I am content. Take care now!

[@sylviahudell2171]

Hi Deb! Thanks for sharing your experience. It takes all kinds of people to make this world. Sorry to hear you had to go through this. Take care.💜❤️

[@DebsWay]

Thank you, Sylvia! Life is good and I am so blessed!! Take care now!

[@hardnackfarms1736]

Deb I am so sorry this happened. I wished we were close and could go have lunch and visit. You’re the sweetest person I know and you care about people, you’re a very good friend. Sending hugs! Wendy❤️🙏🏻🇺🇸

[@DebsWay]

Hi Wendy! How are you doing? I haven't seen any of your videos in such a long time it seems. I'm not on FB as much as I used to be because I just have not been making videos of my own on a regular basis. Have you moved into your new house yet? We're experiencing TS Debby this week-end which for us means strong wind gusts and heavy rains. I've been keeping busy in my sewing nook today during most of the storm. Hope all is well with you and your family. Take care now!!

[@tidbitsofmylife2367]

Deb as sweet and calm that you are it makes me furious to think you were Putin that position. Sounds like C had control over the manager.oh and also the people that had witnessed her behavior were intimidated to stand up forgetting rid of her ongoing control issues. Glad you were able to be a good mommy to missed little Ginger and William. ❤marnie O

[@DebsWay]

Thank you, Marnie! Yes, life is good and I have been so blessed!! I just hate to think that "C" was allowed to continue on with no repercussions. Wonder who else she was allowed to bully?

[@tonirad9577]

I started to read a comment at the beginning that said " whistle blower" and didn't get it at first . I think part of the problem is people don't want to believe you if you do what they think is complaining . I had to call the police on my abusive teenage grandson for the umpteenth time and one of the young cops told me I was an enabler ! I asked him what exactly I had done to make him think that ? Was it because I was crying ? It has since gotten worse and we are having to go to court and we are being investigated because he HIT me and my husband confronted him ! Sometimes you come off the bad guy even when there is no way it was you ! So it is not just in the workplace . Thank goodness you got to leave Deb . I am trapped . On the brighter side , you could volunteer at a senior center and probably be very valued and make some friends and enjoy it . Have a good day . 👋🌹

[@DebsWay]

Hi Toni and thank you for sharing your story. Nobody at work called me a complainer really but, even so, nobody in my workplace could offer any good advice on how to handle the situation. I am enjoying my life in retirement these days; all is good! I hope that you are able to find some help for your grandson. It sounds like he is full of anger and doesn't know how to handle it. Take care now!

[@dianemontavon5670]

C sounds like a spoil brat and she must be related to someone. The manager isn't handling the situation the way it should have been handled. Sorry you didn't get another job, but I'm happy to see you on here.

[@DebsWay]

Diane, I believe that "C" was basically a very unhappy, dissatisfied-with-her-life sort of person and the only "happiness" she found was when she was able to demean and control someone in her path. I am enjoying my life in retirement now. All is good! Take care now!!

[@Deendougretired]

Oh, it had to be really bad for them to put you on paid leave girl as I’m sitting here listening. I hope I’m going to hear they fired her, but let me continue.

[@DebsWay]

Yes, I was on a 30-day paid LOA. I never requested it; HR offered it up front.

[@simplymejourney998]

Hi Deb.

[@DebsWay]

Hello there!

[@Deendougretired]

I’m thinking that C was very threatened by you. It sounds to me as though you are a professional and everything that you did and C might’ve just been coasting. What a shame.

[@DebsWay]

You just might be correct! I had been doing the job a couple of years longer than she had been but my beginning years were in a hospital setting. And, to answer an earlier question, NO, "C" was never fired. For all I know, she's still there bullying away to her heart's content because she knows that HR will ever do anything to her.

[@MyAlabamaFarmLife]

Work Bullies are the worst! Thanks for reposting your experience!

[@DebsWay]

Hi Kathleen! In all my working experience, I had never worked with someone as vicious and controlling as "C". Every now & then I am contacted by someone who viewed this video (I made it about 5 years ago) and tell me how what I had to say helped them in some way. I was urged to release my video again and after thinking about it, I thought, well, maybe I should. If it helps someone else to know that something like this happens to others -- it's not just them or because they're doing something wrong, well, it's worth it.

[@maureenleclair8773]

I am so sorry that you had to go through that, Deb. And I do understand. I retired after 57 years with the same company. When I had been there close to the 45 year mark,. I had worked for many different people over the years, but then my department was combined with another and I got a new supervisor, who wanted me out of there. I was a support person and he wanted a mechanical engineer. Other people in the department heard how he talked to me, and I dreaded going into the office everyday. Thankfully the other employees reported him to the director and the director came to my rescue. My supervisor was transferred to another plant with no employees working for him. So, I do understand what you were feeling. I couldn't quit. I carried the insurance and my husband was very sick. He has since died. I felt trapped, but I had planned to tough it out, because I had no other choice. Enjoy and take of yourself. Enjoy your sewing, ❤🙏❤

[@DebsWay]

OH, Maureen, I know exactly how you felt back then. You were so fortunate to have a director who understood what was going on and took action on it. My manager at the time knew there was an issue with my co-worker. This co-worker had caused problems for others before me. But my manager thought that she could handle the issue with "C" and was working with her. I only hope that, after I left, the work environment improved so that "C" was no longer able to get away with things she did to others. You take care now! Life is good!!

[@TheHapiCamper]

Hi Deb. I’ve been exactly where you are. A whistle blower. You were dealing with a narcissistic personality in “C”. She is full of self hatred and has to be the center of attention to fill the empty space inside herself. “C” should have been fired, especially after other employees had issues with her. The HR dept. was completely wrong iin putting the blame on you. That was a CYA move on their part. When I blew the whistle on more than one employee where I worked HR literally told me I was the common denominator to these people and put the blame on me ( like you I had done Nothing wrong). You’re better off out of there for sure! (Is this an older video) it seems like it is. Regardless, thank you for sharing your experience. By the way, believers have to deal with the enemy in many forms. This was just one of those. Pray for “C” and ask her to be blessed. Believe it or not, it will free you of the negativity you feel toward yourself over what she did. Much love Deb!❤

[@DebsWay]

Yes, Winter, I originally posted this video about 5 years ago and only a few months after everything took place. Over the past few years, I have been contacted by several people who are going through this same sort of experience with a bully and tell me how much my video helped them so I thought that re-posting my video might help others, too. Oh, trust me, I have prayed for "C" because I believe she is a very unhappy person. Winter, I hope all is well with you. I understand the need to take a little break from making videos. Shoot! I don't make videos as often as I used to. My life has slowed waaaayyyy down and I don't have much to video anymore. That's life! Take care now!1

[@TheHapiCamper]

@@DebsWay it’s great that you reposted this so others can benefit from your experience. I’m keeping up my Godly channel. That’s where my passion truly lies these days. I just feel the Lord wants me to go another direction for now! Have a blessed week! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@DebsWay]

You need to do what gives you inner peace. Good for you!

[@Deendougretired]

Really both of you were at fault.! of course she couldn’t tell you why you were both at fault. Unreal.

[@DebsWay]

Yes, that was what their determination was. But they couldn't explain that to me at all; they didn't even try.

[@Carmen96029]

I am SO SO sorry that happened to you Deb 🙁 it’s not bad enough that you have to endure bullying in the workplace but going to management or HR falls on deaf ears 🥺 a scripture that immediately comes to mind is in 1 Peter 2:15 For it is the will of God that by doing good you will silence the foolish talk of ignorant men!! I am now retired but that scripture has served me well in my 30 year career in retail 💞 God bless

[@DebsWay]

Thank you, Carmen. To this day, I wish I had ended my working career in a much better way but I did what I felt was best for me. Life is good! I have been blessed in many ways!! Take care now!

[@Deendougretired]

Oh my Lord literally she was threatening you with bodily harm oh, that’s way too much!

[@DebsWay]

Yep!

[@penguinandthechef7302]

Hi Deb ❤ Very needed and informative video. I'm sorry you've had to deal with that. There is NO place for bullying in the workplace, schools, anywhere. Nothing pisses me off more. I have dealt with a bully/liar/brown-noser in the medical field. My last words to her were, "If you paint your face green, you'd look like the Grinch!" Then I walked out. Within minutes the big boss called me and begged me to return with an increase in salary and a few other perks, but I simply told her I would not be returning because if "T" popped off again, my reaction would be more severe than a few hurtful words and that if they didn't feel the need to resolve it in prior months, then I had no faith they would resolve it now. I think for you and for my own experience, it boiled down to jealousy. Somewhere along the way they realized we were better at our jobs than "C" was and "T" in my case, and maybe they felt their positions were threatened by someone whom could do a much better job. You have a wonderful personality, and sometimes people just dislike cheerful people. They're too uptight and just need a good roll in the hay 🤣 you know what I mean? 😆 I'm glad you're away from that. You deserve much better than to give her a second brain cell. Onward and upward, 😊 my friend. Love you all, XO ❤ 🐾 ❤️ kisses to baby Bella from Auntie Julia XO

[@DebsWay]

Oh, Julia, you are so right! We BOTH deserved better!! I really hated to end my working career in that way BUT I know I did the best thing for me by leaving. I'm enjoying my retirement now. Life is Good!! Hope all is well with you guys!! Take care now!

[@Deendougretired]

I definitely feel sorry for the person that replaced you because it sounds to me as though there are many people that took C abuse and that that’s what it was

[@DebsWay]

Me, too!

[@RVAshsinApril]

I've been in similar situation. It can be very hard on your mental health, I ended up having to quit. It was 8 years and it still makes me angry to think about it.

[@DebsWay]

You know it very well! I felt like such a failure to be ending my working career in such a way but I did what was best for me ... and I don't regret doing it. Life is Good!!

[@HoneyandMe]

I've never had to go through this, but I can imagine it is pretty bad. I'm so sorry you and others who have also experienced this have had to deal with people who are toxic.

[@DebsWay]

"Toxic people" is right! They are toxic to themselves and everyone around them. Hope you are enjoying your travels!

[@dizzyquiltsandsews]

It sounds like you had a horrible experience! I’m glad you decided to do what felt right for yourself. I really and truly believe bullies are just miserable people who have to belittle others in order to feel like they are better. Pretty sad really.

[@DebsWay]

I believe the same as you -- bullies are very unhappy people who make themselves feel better by picking on others. Hard to understand how someone can think that way but I think that's how they justify their behavior.

[@bryansloesshillshomestead4523]

Sometimes it ends up backfiring when a manager takes a bully aside to talk to them about an issue. I've seen where they are even worse with their behavior. My wife has dealt with bullies in the job she has now. Management has never helped with my wife's bullies. Thankfully they all have quite and or have gotten fired for different reasons. My wife is enjoying her job much better now. Sorry you had to go through all this.

[@DebsWay]

Oh, Brian, tell your wife I empathize totally with her. I know what she went through. So glad to hear that she is enjoying her workplace these days. That's the way it should be! Take care now!!

[@dedelovesbling2313]

I'm a new subscriber. I'm not sure how your video ended up in my feed, but wow I sure do resonate with you. I've actually had a couple of situations over the years. Usually I would apply for jobs and give my notice before it escalated; however, the last incident went on for almost ten years. At every review I would discuss my frustrations with my immediate supervisor and HR and every year they would say the same thing. Basically, I don't know what to say he's not going to change you'll have to learn how to work with him. After many incidents that I won't go into, last July I grabbed all of my belongings and walked out the door. I wrote HR and management a long email detailing everything I felt they had not helped me with to make my job easier. I enjoyed the work I performed and my clients, but the abuse i received was unforgivable. I have retired and I purposely chose to distance myself from all of my previous coworkers. At first I mulled everything over and over again, then I was a little depressed, but now I'm happy. I still want to work because I'm bored, but now I don't have to work so that will make a huge difference. Thanks for telling your story. I'm glad you spoke up for yourself, because so many do not. Instead they usually complain to anyone who will listen to them.

[@DebsWay]

Hi there! And thank you for sharing your story, too. Even though I hated ending my working career in this manner, I still feel that I did the best thing for my own well-being. I had had enough! I am happy with my retirement and life is Good!! You take care now!

[@leadmetopeacejeanie]

This is so sad because there are many excellent people out there who work hard for a living, yet have to move on due to the bullying that is not addressed by management. Thank you for reposting your video. I am glad you are okay and you are a survivor!! hugs, Jeanie xxoo

[@DebsWay]

Thanks, Jeanie! You knew about my frustrations when they were happening back then but, yes, life is SO GOOD now. However, I still wish I had ended my working career in a much different way.

[@leadmetopeacejeanie]

@@DebsWay I remember how awful that was for you. People shouldn't be promoted or overlooked for behavior like this. Sadly, they are. But, we are both in good places now! xxoo

[@DebsWay]

We sure are! I am enjoying my life in retirement these days!! I am very happy and content! God is Good!!

[@tonylarson1960able]

Guess yt didn't like my comment! Sorry you had to experience such a crappy person! God bless sister!

[@DebsWay]

Hi Tony! Were you being naughty?? LOLOLOLOL...Really though, thank you. How's life in NV? Wonder if it's as hot and miserable there as it has been in Florida? Take care!!

[@tonylarson1960able]

@DebsWay well just a bit! It Involved ass whoopin and maybe western justice! Your family and stuff like that is unacceptable behavior! And there was a comment about some one wettin themselves! It's been hotter than heck here 110° plus for over a week! It's yuckie!

[@tonylarson1960able]

​@DebsWay Well that's twice! Been 110° plus for over a week! Yt police evidently don't honor free speech! Stay cool guys! God bless!

[@tonylarson1960able]

​@DebsWay three times! Yup it's hot here110° plus for over a week!

[@DebsWay]

Yes, I would say that's really hot!!! Stay as cool as you can!