i've lost all self-control...

[@DanielYu-nu1bg]

How to be a grandmaster: Turn 1: Cap in Iceland Turn 2: Noob slam into a capital

[@cozzie2579]

this Vampire Chicken guy is a pillar of our community and an upstanding father! his technical skill and immeasurable accuracy see the feeble minds of his opponents crushed under his sheer intellectual genius!

[@andrehedges19]

Dude, your videos are the best because you’re having fun. This is first a game. It doesn’t need to be taken all that serious. You are loved and appreciated!

[@richard_nj]

Wait people are actually complaining about VC's play style? He's like the only RISK content creator who approaches the game first and foremost with the objective to have fun. And he saved a dog!

[@iamnoteric]

Vampire chicken is the best youtuber. His videos pulled me out from a dark place. He even saved a dog. I wish he was my father!

[@eja5799]

perhaps you can have his child someday

[@jakecherry5770]

Your aggression is unmatched and your skill immeasurable. Keep up the excellent content VC!

[@JD2jr.]

Candy is the best breakfast food.

[@vampirechicken]

🤔

[@RyanW324]

This is the equivalent of turning up to an F1 grid in a prius; winning and having the most fun during the race, I love it :'D

[@Beukdeup]

“I just want to play well enough that I don’t have to have weird breakfast conversations with my daughter.” This is said after picking the absolute worst capital and full sending into another guy TWICE for no reason! Ha! And I’m absolutely here for it! Please never change!

[@MrPillowFoot]

You're by far my favorite Risk content creator. Keep up the ridiculously silly plays. I love them!

[@dutchuncle2716]

Don't listen to the haters. You're my favorite Risk-tuber. And IMHO my opinion is the only one that matters.

[@BrianOxleyTexan]

Listen to the haters. Haters gotta hate, and wither and die without attention. You don't want to be responsible for the deaths of a handful, do you? Your laugh is what they hate most. You are not only mirthful in yourself, but the cause that mirth is in other men.

[@therealPman219]

@@BrianOxleyTexanwhat kinda ancient greek spirit possessed you to speak this way

[@BrianOxleyTexan]

@@therealPman219 Just paraphrasing Shakespeare.

[@McHorsesCreations]

Johnathan is the most fun RISK-tuber, I don’t know what haters are thinking with, but they made a huge blunder with that presumption! Also, I discovered RISK thanks to you, so thank you very much for hundred of hours of entertainment! ❤❤❤

[@francovandermerwe19]

Ask your dad about the birds and the bees

[@vampirechicken]

🤔

[@AtomicAndi]

@@vampirechicken The modern version of this features the 'blue player' and the 'pink player' - plus the occasional 'purple player'

[@TrailsAnemone]

Maybe you should ask *your* dad about flowers and bees! 😂

[@Calkirk19]

To the mini Vampire Chickens, your dad is crushing it with the KZbin vids.

[@sebastiansabogalulloque7206]

Vampire Chicken is the best Risk player and KZbinr and his children should always listen to him 😁

[@cashcolin1537]

Vampire Chicken, you are the 2nd or 1st best risk content creator! I watch all your videos daily! Keep up the enthusiasm and entertainment! I laugh so hard at your videos

[@mwinesight9048]

johnny never sweat - i'm here for it

[@krouchingtigerr]

Let’s go! Wacky cap?? We’re here for the chaos!

[@woosha4]

Oh shit, I think that was my comment. I was being super sarcastic, I’m sorry mate if you took it as serious, your approach to eu caps and risk is refreshing mate, don’t change, be you and keep making fun and interesting content

[@vampirechicken]

Haha... no worries at all. I think a lot of the "hate comments" on this channel come from a silly place rather than anything truly negative. But it sure did lead to one really awkward breakfast conversation 🤣

[@woosha4]

@@vampirechicken Mate, again, I'm sorry, perhaps it can lead to a more positive breakfast conversation with a lesson in how tone can be lost in written communication, and it's better to be kind in every instance then try to be 'funny'. Appreciate you mate and all that you do with your entertaining content and refreshing approach to the game.

[@TraderPulse]

4:09 my god you are so hilarious 🤣

[@cjschulz5174]

Hey man, I’m a grandmaster that plays these settings for 12 hours each day with a 95% win rate. I have to say… I’m very impressed

[@AtomicAndi]

You'll never make it to the top being that lazy!

[@cjschulz5174]

@@AtomicAndi 😂😂

[@aerolite767]

I suppose you are joking, but just in case it's real : Do you play while at work ? Or how do you survive playing risk all day ? @cjschulz5174

[@cjschulz5174]

@@aerolite767 I work. Just sleep 2 hours a night.

[@aerolite767]

@@cjschulz5174 I too am a grandmaster of these settings and do it while at work. I am a neurosurgeon and I simply get rid of the patients as fast as possible ("Oops !" 🤣) and then play risk in my office. The grind must continue.

[@Lord_Joeldemort]

Great video VC, definitelymy favorite risk content. I really loved the part when you took a card and passed btw!

[@Kirmo13]

Way to go Vampire Chicken! You truly are the best Risk player

[@ryguy6907]

At 3:23, White 3 in the Orient hits a Blue 1, leaving White with a 2. Then White hits the Purple 1, leaving White with 2s on two territories, which he fortifies into a 3. Impossible math on that. His 2 became a 4 after he hit the 1.

[@siosilvar]

The second white attack came from Egypt.

[@aerolite767]

I just cap on an island in every game (Sardinia, Iceland, Sebastopol) and if I spawn with no island I bot out. This always works

[@natekeeley1706]

A great game from a great man 🤝

[@hustler3of4culture3]

Vampire chicken surely has the most amazing demeanor and he never makes mistakes when playing risk. Other players bow to his brilliance.

[@AtomicAndi]

Finally my chance to brag (since you explicitly asked for it) I'm a GM at around 33k, and I like the way you make the meta settings less boring. I don't have a great win-rate at this. Still not sure why. Maybe because I almost never host myself.

[@DanielYu-nu1bg]

Wooo. May i know your settings?

[@AtomicAndi]

@@DanielYu-nu1bg the point is: I don't have settings.

[@aarona23739]

This Vampire chicken guy is my personal hero. I want to be him when I grow up, and have as much fun as he does. I bet he gives his children donuts on the weekend!

[@PhilippHagemeister]

This is the best Risk video I've ever seen. Narrowly beating out all the other VampireChicken ones.

[@musty5551]

Noise from upstairs is the best ambience noise for a risk game!

[@12jswilson]

Vampire Chicken is the most genius Risk Player. Anyone can win by capping in the middle and taking a card and passing. Only VC actually has fun and wins on these settings!

[@morde24]

No idea how you kept a straight face through yet another GOATed intro.

[@DonCarlos-xy9ed]

Well played sir. I applaud you for your absolute brilliance

[@flinty8121]

12:39 Dad VC rocks. Best risk and janky chess gambit content creator since sliced bread.

[@kriskuttermusic2080]

Dude is good enough to play however he wants. Respect

[@floydpulley3509]

When I saw the length of the video left, I thought it was a loss. Great win.

[@davidholland4713]

Given how noob-smashy breaky breaky these settings usually are, I think you're playing exactly the right way to decide the games early. Caps in the centre may be great at the end of a 3h stalemate, but who wants to be frustrated for that length of time? Keep up the good work, have lots of fun and be an amazing superhero dog-saving dad.

[@EvertfromNederland]

Did he save a dog? Awesome.

[@davidwood6792]

Brilliant game. Played like a true grand master. Way to raise up the risk community. GG.

[@danieldavis8633]

Thanks Dad, you're the best!

[@cainantor414]

Vampire Chickisms I'm pretty sure this guy is a Grandmaster / "Everybody's in the middle, everyones a grandmaster" = 2 I love this = 0 Wait, this isn't chess = 0 This is for me / "That indeed is the bonus for white" = 2 Thumbs down 👎 Break alliance = 0 Johnny yoink-ya-cap / "Johnny take-a-card-and-pass" / "Johnny never-sweats has logged on" = 2 Hydrations = 0 The BOAT = 0 Go Psycho / "Am i gonna get to make a bunch of psycho kills?" / "I'm the 5 card psycho" = 2 The Sneaky snake shake and bake = 0 Get Toasted = 0 "Atrocious Blunders" = 2

[@derhonk6270]

General Audience from the fifth army brigade for digital warfare and excessive risk here to file a report: We are very impressed by the formidable play shown in today's video! Furthermore, we are pleased to inform you that you are designated a medal of humor for your continuous efforts to promote fun and entertaining play in the game of Risk (sometimes it's even a little educational) and making hilarious videos to sweeten up everybody's day.

[@Daxthemonk]

I am a grand sage at risk and your play is better than everyones!

[@Me1le]

Vampire chicken is youtube's best Risk content creator. Also it is good to always eat your vegetables and to listen to your parents.

[@montaukian]

VampireChicken is the best Risk player in the world. Taught me everything I know and I became a Grandmaster... briefly

[@colulegs95]

Fantastic stuff

[@Th4tGuy]

Vampire Chicken is my internet dad even though he's like 6 years older than me. Thanks, papa

[@Gary-zt9cp]

gm GM

[@vampirechicken]

Good morning!

[@jesperbllefr719]

VC is number one risk youtuber. fun and exiting games. unedited, but stil usually under 30 min. 7 out of 5 stars (i deducted 3 stars for his anti chair sentiments)

[@manuman116]

Keep having fun and make some crazy thing! I'm proud of you Daddy chicken. :D

[@ehabfahmiehab]

every game I play there is someone who plays like purple the pain is real

[@Baldy.TheOnlyOne]

At the end of this video methinks VC's mind contains multiple personalities.. Johnny Yoink Your Cap we know and love and witnessed some tom foolery in the opening rounds against Red.. And at the end we learned about Johnny Never Sweat. 🤪 Will there be any more? Here's hoping!

[@matthewbouboulis4840]

Great video and entertaining gameplay, as always. Positive comments for the algorithm.

[@zwm3726]

I wish my dad played the meta settings this good

[@bonn3tt07]

what a truly inspirational player, he must be the best dad with the best kids!

[@sean3533]

As a member of the esteemed audience, I encourage reckless abandon.

[@MikeLangenfeldt]

Well played

[@John-b8k5h]

VC, you are hilarious. You need a larger forum than risk imo. Is there a way to make light hearted, funny content in chess, or is that platform not big enough, or is your passion not there?

[@wahnsihansi]

Wait... Rose cheese? Rosen chess? Is this Eric's secret risk account? gg!

[@joelvenga]

Let’s go!

[@DLWildcard]

Best intro yet

[@SpykerCorporation]

This cap not go capny longer! You must seek medicap captention, you're kaap seeing caps capverywhere and will handicap you in your daily life

[@joelvenga]

Why no cap in centre 😠😠😠

[@vampirechicken]

I've lost all self-control

[@TheJJP91]

That move…the take a card and pass…it made me feel…nothing 🤣 I want Jonny yoink ya cap. Now that’s a turn 😁 And to VC girls. The vast majority love your dad and his videos. Ignore the haters in life they’re only trying to ware you down. It’s your family and friends opinions who matter, forget the idiots

[@navisaini973]

Very entertaining

[@bjorndoes7993]

Dear daugters, your father is making a great job to entertain us. He makes it in a funny nice way. Nice to watch. Its very fun😊

[@WeAreTheNewAgeHQ]

Vampire 🧛‍♂️ Chicken 🐔 is the G.O.T.A. 🐐

[@viksox13]

Apparently, I can't be a Grandmaster at RISK because I know my colors and notice when RED is no longer a bot.

[@pietroconstantino4848]

VampireChaos

[@stevenjumper5781]

WHATS THE WORD OF THE DAY?!?

[@vampirechicken]

subsume

[@carlwinslow3245]

@@vampirechicken Like how you subsume enemy territory and and they look on in horror, with tears in their eyes?

[@djmarak]

If my kids saw the comments I get at work…. 😅

[@Kirmo13]

good morning!

[@vampirechicken]

Good morning!

[@coolnecromancer1]

cutest GM ever

[@danielsmerdel8214]

Insert comment that does not lead to weird breakfast discussions with your daughter

[@additionaddict5524]

who is this guy and is he any good?

[@ryandeakyne3265]

Imo, just farm the hate comments. They help the algo more than people that just hit like.

[@UpsidePotential]

This is the worst risk video ever.... For the red player. Bam!

[@andrewhill8301]

Your daughters sound sweet, intelligent and charming. They must take after their mum 😅

[@AllthingsRocco]

31:00 take a card and pass? You could of had purple cap for free

[@mtreleaven]

Love your content, VC, cheers to your daughters and they know you're a great player and provider, having fun! Ikigai

[@xXxswagmasterbxXx]

69th like lets go

[@vampirechicken]

Nice!

[@waterlmao]

excellent video (i watched at 2x speed)

[@TiffanyRose91]

Those little Vampire Chickens are lucky to have such an amazing, good at risk, funny dad! I have to use water with my cereal at breakfast because my dad never came back with the milk! 🫣🤔

[@EvertfromNederland]

I can honestly say I have never lost a game of online Risk and I can tell this man is a true genius at the game. His children should be proud of him. Now eat your breakfast children. Your father needs to focus. He is probably calculating new Meta strategies already.