I Want To Accept A Job Abroad Against My Husbands Wishes r/Relationships

[@karenrickert9430]

Yikes! Having two additional kids to provide “spare parts” for her unhealthy child is just awful!

[@jonescity]

And creepy if you think about it. Some Halloween mess!

[@ZoeAlleyne]

Isn't that like the plot of My Sister's Keeper or something?

[@raggarbergman]

@@ZoeAlleyne Prewtty much.

[@simoneperkins4419]

I haven't listened to the story yet but just seeing this comment gives me mass Neal Shusterman Unwind vibes.

[@angeleyesgreen1586]

So gross to do that. Makes you wonder if they're loved and wanted by anyone or if there's resentment that the spare parts didn't work out

[@ashassassin]

Story 2 was one of the most horrific ones ive heard. Ops biomom had 2 children so she could use their bodies for spare parts for her other child. op doged a bullet by not having that monster in their life.

[@Emi_TheWinged]

Yeah like what the actualy F. That monster should have those kids taken from her actually, who the f knows how is she treating them if they are literally spare parts the her, or what is she willing to do to them to save the sick daughter...

[@hilaryc3203]

All of her family members who bombarded him with messages should ante up with a portions each to help her if they were on her side that much.

[@Vashti-g7i]

I feel so badly for those kids. I know in some states it's illegal to do this.

[@johnbradbury8610]

Op sounds like a dumbass. PPD doesn't come close to explaining abandonment for 25 years. " my stepmom had it" right and she dealt with it. I could understand if OP wanted to vent, but for a 27-year-old to ask AITA not giving $25,000( which is $1,000 dollars for every year she was gone)to the mother that abandoned her is ridiculous.

[@yourlocalcoffeeaddict9603]

I havent finished the story and went to the comments, what the fuck??? I feel so sick now, wtf is that

[@Ventura574]

Story 1 is a cautionary tale for everyone in their 20s. What you think you want at 23 may be wildly different from what you want at 26, and may change again in just a couple of years. OP hasn't even been an adult for a decade at this point. I'm glad they worked it out, but people that age group need to remember that they still have a lot of growing and exploring to do, before they really know what they truly want. My cousin, for instance, swore up and down she wanted to be a career woman, forever and always, and only wanted 1 kid. She had a great career in fashion, making good money, and traveling all over the world. After her first was born, all her expectations for herself, flew out the window. She sobbed and cried when she was set to go back to work, and ended up returning only long enough to pick out and train her replacement. She ended up having 4 kids and became a SAHM. Now that the youngest is graduating HS, she's dipping her toe back into the work pool, in marketing.

[@alyzu4755]

Story 1: I agree with the commenter who said there are no AHs. It seems they're growing apart, which isn't surprising. They're both in their 20's and growing their respective careers. But OP is 26, while her husband is 29. They may be in different stages in their lives. She was 23 when she agreed to stay put, and that's very young to be planning the rest of your life. I hope her husband will be OK with this move.

[@piratsnygg]

Yes, this is what I was thinking. In our 20's three years make a big difference. We grow like hell in our 20's, and most people are not the same at ages 20, 23, 26, and 29. It's nobody's fault. It's just the way things are.

[@joshuaortega1852]

OP says the husband is domestic but then when people call her out now she's all he wants to move there too.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

I have to doubt the update once again. In the last week, I have seen many of these types of stories that I call The Reddit Two-Step on this channel as well as a few others I watch such as Markee and Lost Genre. It is when the OP tells their original story thinking most of the people will side with them and it turns out very few if any side with them. The OPs are literally decimated in the comments and they get really upset about it. Often, they lash out in the comments and that is where their stories start to "fall apart" and a bit of the truth starts coming out. Then in an update(s) or in this case, an "Edit", the OP either comes up with bad or sketchy behavior about the other person(s) in their original story that they claimed is so awesome which essentially turns the original story upside down. In this case, she walked back her claims of their "never going to do this" discussion that it wasn't "NEVER" it was just not now but later (which is opposite of her claim of how her husband is a "homebody" and not like herself who is "cosmopolitan"). Then in the update, she basically says he "compromised" to her wants and shows all the readers how basically "she was right" about everything. While she was able to do this without really trashing her husband, she did show how she gave up NOTHING and he gave up EVERYTHING just to show how her original plan was the best idea and her husband finally realized it. Sorry, not buying this "Edit" or "Update". I am willing to bet she is going and he will be staying. Also, why would they send a 26-year-old with only a few years in their business to open a new branch when previously she stated that ONLY one of the co-owners would do this job??? It just doesn't make sense they would send someone with limited time on the job vs. themselves or others in the company with much more experience. This whole thing just doesn't pass the smell test when you look at it as a whole.

[@Ashbrash1998]

Domestic doesn't always mean they never want to move or can't change their mind. It just means they like to stay at home.😊

[@lilfairykiki122]

Yea i caught that too, how are you going to get mad people responded to the information that you gave and act like they made it up?

[@alexanderhenby1362]

I wonder if this exam, for some amount of certification, I'm sure, is more transferable. Say OPs husband is an electrical engineer and getting certified in a specialty might make him go from useless abroad to highly sought after.

[@lynnw7155]

Agreed. She made it sound like her husband definitely didn't want to move. So him agreeing to move sounds 100% like he's caving in. "As long as it's only for 6 months"...yeah. What are the chances OP will get sucked in to staying longer, or going to some other new country.

[@808atlas5]

"Saviour children" truly is such a broken thing. Imagine being that child - born to save someone else, and not being a match to do so.... Not only do you have to live with the fact, that you weren't actually wanted, you also have to live with the fact that, you couldn't even save the only thing important to your parents which makes you nothing - a nobody....... Ahhhh breaks my damn heart....

[@saffronjay3903]

I would be trying to form a relationship with those kids so they had a way out.

[@hi_stranger9156]

Story 2: I'm surprised OP wasn't asked to get tested on the off chance that she would be a match for the half sister. "Hi honey, I know we haven't met in 25 years but could you give us $50k and your sister could she got your bone marrow? come on be a sweetheart! you can afford it and it would mean so much to the family."

[@johnbradbury8610]

You haven't heard of the 25 year PPD

[@mbyerly9680]

While you are at it, she really needs your heart. Remember to change your will to let me inherit before you kill yourself so your sister can get your heart.

[@Sherwoody]

One would think that egg donor would be a viable donor.

[@marshawargo7238]

OP should have stood up in the restaurant/ Cafe wherever & said loudly "Hey anyone want to contribute money & body parts to this lady's kid? Because you are all just as related as I am to them? No? Well I guess you've got your answer "MOM" Now Go & Don't contact me again!!! Wow! What a Selfish Ahole!!!

[@erickaennis2738]

I could never do this to a child. It's selfish and cruel.

[@imjustgonnasayit415]

Man, the husband is putting his needs and feelings aside to please her. I hope things work out for him

[@Janjones7735]

Better that she do it for him? They should split and find partners that make them happy.

[@ravenmagic5]

​@@Janjones7735 she lied to him and told him she didn't want that lifestyle anymore. You seem to keep glossing over that part.

[@lauragarza7585]

@@ravenmagic5 she’s allowed to change her mind and change her feelings. That’s why she wanted to have the secondary talk with him. And I feel like they should’ve had that talk anyway. People change over time.

[@Ashbrash1998]

​@@ravenmagic5LDR is one thing, moving is another. Husband also thought his job could work outside his country too. Things can change

[@Scipio12232]

I think its funny that uf the situation was reversed people would argue very differently and defend the man a lot more because he earns more (she earns 3x what he earns). It would be argued that he is the breadwinner abd she should support him. Sexism is funny, I want to puke 😂

[@Swnsasy]

I am so sick and tired of people like that biomom and then gives out the phone number to all these people to harass him.. She's not thought about him for 25 fucking years and she asks for money for complete strangers! The name calling and all of that from people he doesn't even know at all and don't know him yet has the audacity to call him, A STRANGER, and cuss out! Wow. Some people really have some balls I swear.. Hi, haven't talked to you in 25yrs but umm, can I have $45000? Wtf man...

[@JK-sh8rc]

Did the family of OP's bio mother think they could badger & insult OP into forking over $45,000? Bio mom and her family sound vile.

[@Yume10605]

It's simple. But Family (said in the whiniest tone you can imagine)

[@Jesse_E5150]

I hope the husband in story 1decided to move because he wants to and not to appease OP. Hope it goes well for them.

[@sks17873]

To be fair to op, she did say it was for only 6 months. That’s not very long living abroad and it’s only a short break in work for him

[@a91dan54]

6 months is long wtf

[@Jesse_E5150]

​@sks17873 My only fear would be if this is just a one-time thing, or if she going to constantly accept offers to go abroad.

[@MaryTheresa1986]

​@@Jesse_E5150I think she'll want to, which will breed resentment on both sides. I think they should just split up.

[@socketyellow3]

@@sks17873yeah but she would need to stay to remain the branch manager or return to a lesser position

[@carlrood4457]

So if a complete stranger comes up and asks you for $45,000, would you give it to them? No? Same situation here, except it's a blood relative. Relatives and family are two different things.

[@feministawry1600]

Story 1 seems like OP was lying in her update, has she changed a lot of details of their agreement and how now he's not so "domestic" as she stated in the initial post.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

NAILED IT. I have to doubt the update once again. In the last week, I have seen many of these types of stories that I call The Reddit Two-Step on this channel as well as a few others I watch such as Markee and Lost Genre. It is when the OP tells their original story thinking most of the people will side with them and it turns out very few if any side with them. The OPs are literally decimated in the comments and they get really upset about it. Often, they lash out in the comments and that is where their stories start to "fall apart" and a bit of the truth starts coming out. Then in an update(s) or in this case, an "Edit", the OP either comes up with bad or sketchy behavior about the other person(s) in their original story that they claimed is so awesome which essentially turns the original story upside down. In this case, she walked back her claims of their "never going to do this" discussion that it wasn't "NEVER" it was just not now but later (which is opposite of her claim of how her husband is a "homebody" and not like herself who is "cosmopolitan"). Then in the update, she basically says he "compromised" to her wants and shows all the readers how basically "she was right" about everything. While she was able to do this without really trashing her husband, she did show how she gave up NOTHING and he gave up EVERYTHING just to show how her original plan was the best idea and her husband finally realized it. Sorry, not buying this "Edit" or "Update". I am willing to bet she is going and he will be staying. Also, why would they send a 26-year-old with only a few years in their business to open a new branch when previously she stated that ONLY one of the co-owners would do this job??? It just doesn't make sense they would send someone with limited time on the job vs. themselves or others in the company with much more experience. This whole thing just doesn't pass the smell test when you look at it as a whole.

[@uh8myzen]

Why? I'm 50 years old, and I've seen this exact thing happen with friends and colleagues, and I've been in his shoes and like him changed my mind after being furious because I was being asked to give up an already established career to look for something new. Sure, she could be lying, but him changing his mind is not so far removed for common that it's fair to automatically assume she's lying for Reddit likes. It's a pretty mundane thing that happens all the time.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

@@uh8myzen People lying on Reddit has become very commonplace. They usually are trying to get validation for their bad behavior and often leave many important facts out to be seen in the best light. Those things usually come out in comments and even accidentally in updates. When an update or edit has the people in the story change 180 degrees from the original story, that is also a clue things are not "factual". You are trying to justify the OP's story based upon a situation you have seen or experienced which appears "similar" but probably really isn't if you really sat down and compared them. So you are telling us then that you are a very uncompromising person just as the OP in this story was??? That's not a real good look for you.

[@uh8myzen]

@@thomasjoseph5876 First, I'm not trying to justify anything, I'm just stating that it's not so far outside common experience that it is necessarily a lie. Second, I stated quite clearly that she could be lying but qualified that in my experience, things like this do happen, so I don't see it as necessarily a lie. And third, you might want to reread my comment, because insinuating that I'm uncompromising despite the fact that I was clear in my comment that I was the one who compromised and moved despite my initial apprehension is the bad look here.

[@eveliinahannele]

It's 6 months, calm down. It's like a long vacation for the husband after stressful period.

[@kixi8033]

1. YTA. She agreed that she wouldn't do work abroad again and is not only going back on her word but she clearly doesn't seem to care too much about what her husband thinks and feels. Of course he's going to be upset. He doesn't want long distance anymore and his career is just about to take off. Its amazing how she can't see why he wouldn't be excited for her. If my husband sprung on me that he was offered a position abroad and there was little to no chance I could work in a field I spent time and money to study in, I'd be pretty upset too if he was considering taking it. That update is also headshaking. I highly doubt he's now willing to move for the reasons she stated. He was probably afraid she'd leave him and he agreed to go so he doesn't lose her.

[@eveliinahannele]

That is not what she agreed though. It's 6 months, they'll be just fine.

[@jakeking3859]

I would question in the half-sister in story two is even sick at all. That 'teary-eyed confession' from her bio mum was sooooo obviously staged. The nasty pieces of work are the bio mum and 'step-dad' for the emotional manipulation. What awful people.

[@ZombieMinion1992]

I’ll be honest it sounds like it’s true, especially since the bio mom admitted to having her other two children to be spare parts for their oldest I can’t imagine someone admitting to that

[@shells500tutubo]

@@ZombieMinion1992You may not be able to imagine that, but I and many others can definitely imagine her lying about all of it., including the reason for having the other two kids.

[@McBruce999]

S1: Sounds like the untold story of the future is bad for both OP and her husband. OP sounds more like an opportunist than what she says she is. People who can't keep up promises and their own words, end up being manipulators and self-destructive in the long run.

[@johnbradbury8610]

I don't see this marriage lasting. they will both be AHs if the have children.

[@McBruce999]

@@johnbradbury8610 Exactly true, people ignore the massive red flags, just to keep the peace and happiness momentarily. Her intentions are clear as day to the Reddit and KZbin community. But I am sure she is putting up a different front in front of her husband.

[@KadeStringer2.0]

No one asked for your unwanted advice

[@theresapaine7224]

Um... What? Why would she ever want to turn down her dream career? R u saying this just because she is a career driven woman? I wonder how u would have reacted if the genders were reversed.

[@McBruce999]

@@theresapaine7224 It applies to both men and women. When you make a promise and a rule before getting married, then you have to abide by it. Don't jump to conclusions and make it some nonsense of sex, religion, and race cards. Understand the story first, then read the comments to see what they are saying. Just because you are a career-driven woman/man, does the rules or promises mean different to you.

[@kristinewatson3702]

Story 2: where were those flying monkeys when OP's egg donor completely ABANDONED OP? UGH that entire family sucks. OP already has a great family. Block them all and walk away.

[@carlrood4457]

Most likely made up the PPD as part of her manipulation of OP and garner sympathy. Couldn't really use the "I was just a kid" excuse because so was Dad and he stepped up.

[@RuminatingRaptor]

@@thecursed01 Better for her to leave instead of staying and treating the child like crap. Not paying child support is disgusting.

[@aubreymorgan9763]

when one partner wants to travel and the other does not it only leads to resentment and regret. best to amicably split, irreconcilable differences.

[@CatLoverX74]

It always disgusts me when parents have kids to be spare parts for the another kid 😡 What a monster! OP dodged a bullet having that monster for her mother! Had the audacity to ask her for $45k (probably more if she agreed) then when she says no sends flying monkeys after her! I’m honestly surprised she didn’t try to get OP to see if she was a match for her daughter 🙄 I’m glad OP had the sense to realize she only got in touch to get money out of her. I’m also glad she has an amazing dad who didn’t just give her up and run like her mom. Also a mom (stepmom) who adopted her.

[@icantchange.youtubesaysine7338]

Story 2 reminds me of My Sisters Keeper. Parents who have kids for the purpose to be donors to their other child are disgusting people. They don't think about thoses other kids.

[@ZombieMinion1992]

This is why I really believe that minors shouldn’t be able to donate blood, bone marrow or organs without talking to a licensed therapist first without the parents present. There are just too many parents who are more than happy to either have more kids to keep their oldest alive or to sell off their kids, blood and marrow and organs for a quick buck.

[@judyjohnson9610]

That story gives rise to a lot of questions. I cried at the end

[@SLTheOneAndAwesome19]

​@ZombieMinion1992 Where I live you can't donate blood until 17 with parents' permission or 18 without.

[@crem-crem4070]

Story 1: this is quite literally the story of my parents, my dad was in my mom’s home country for work and decided to return to his home country while my mom was studying law and had promising career prospects. My mom followed him to his home country and 20+ years later doesn’t regret it

[@AndyyWithAY]

YT ate my comment for some reason 🤬 so summarizing what I said before They decided no more LDR, then OP unilaterally decides something that makes it LDR. It's only a 2 hour flight and 6 months, but it's not what they decided. OP wants to keep traveling when her husband can only work in their country. They sound incompatible. YTA

[@GiordanDiodato]

Read the update, it's not the husband's fault, it's his field. plus he's also wanted to travel

[@dwayneanderson2048]

​@@GiordanDiodato😆😆😆😆 fake story now she updated and just like magic he wants to travel this is created writing there are too many loop wholes in the first half of this story this is why people don't take the stand in their trials 😆😆😆😆

[@simonO712]

It would only be an LDR if shd moved and her husband stayed though, bot if both of them moved.

[@Buff_Helpy]

Story 1: I don't see this ending well. Giving up your career like that for a person is just asking for resentment and trouble. EDIT; last comment was spot on, they're doomed.

[@BlackhatSpb]

Totally agree. Whatever they choose to do, their relationship is most likely doomed.

[@Siinwu]

1st story is not gonna last long, OP is insufferable, alway me me me, i hope the husband wakes up and realises this. 2nd story she baby trapped the dad, used him to get her degree and left them both, 100% she did NOT have PPD, OP is right she has a real mom and this witch is not it.

[@annhans3535]

That happened to me just after I had my daughter. It was a move to Australia for 6 months then, England for 6 months. With a new baby and husband just getting settled into his career, I had to say no. It ended up being the death of my career. I tried to get promoted and was turned down. I moved into a different department and did not get a promised promotion. I had to leave.

[@enjolireyes643]

Story 1- the relationship sounds like it is becoming incompatible and they need counseling or to rip of the Band Aid and split! Resentment will build one way or another. It’s best for them to truly realize that! But they had previous discussions and now OP has different ambitions! Story 2- so mother abandons daughter, then only gets back into contact to WEASEL OP for money? Oooh weeee. NO is a complete answer. I want to be a LOT ruder but yeah screw that egg donor!

[@kkcuzz]

This right here

[@Sherwoody]

Years ago, (many years), I turned down a job where I would have to move a few hours away. She asked me “what will become of us”. Her job was easily replaceable, as she got a new one every few months so it wasn’t a career problem. I thought it was a good opportunity for us to begin a life together. I turned down the job, and unbeknownst to me,….she was able to continue on with someone she was seeing on the side.

[@agentzapdos4960]

If she leaves him, they'll both be better off.

[@chaosshiva4165]

For frick’s sake why do families have to keep guilt tripping WTF??? Just talk behind their backs like my family does if you got some venting to do. Leave them alone! Stop harassing people you claim as family!

[@kimberlyterasaki4843]

Story 2: not only is biomom a terrible mom to OP but also to her youngest kids who she only had as “savior siblings.” She is in a hole entirely of her own making and she knows it.

[@Allmightyimortal]

Story 2, op's nta but honestly the people I feel the most for are her younger half-siblings who were literally born to be parts for their elder sister. You don't come back from that. They also can't just nc yet and leave. They are kids. Not sure if op can call cps about that

[@yaaaawwn]

The husband of the OP is a nice guy. She really was clouded by her excitement and the poor guy was just processing everything

[@ronniepickett4586]

She’s an even worse person for having children just to save one child

[@idkkkk7588]

Story 2: The fact that the bio mom and step dad only had more kids to save their older child is fucking disgusting. I also wonder if part of the plan down the road was for OP to get tested as well to see if they're a match in addition to the money. Also those younger kids are gonna have bucket loads of trauma when they grow up if they ever find out the truth

[@Tyanna01]

Story 2: That update. "Savior siblings"? That should be considered child abuse. You know those two kids aren't being given a good life b/c they couldn't save their sibling.

[@ellorasg4525]

Story 1: OH BOY! This is going to end up with a lot of resentment.

[@SuperOdyss]

I put off pursuing a law career because we had to move to another country for my wife's career. She promised me if I sacrificed for her she would for me and allow me to pursue that law career. She got what she wanted and split. If I were OP's BF I would kick her to the curb. No real problems I had a profitable and successful career, but don't believe these pie-in-the-sky promises from selfish people like OP, it will always be her career coming first.

[@SuadAbubakarHassan]

The moment OP entertained the idea of moving her decision was made. OP doesn't want advice only validation. Just break it off and move on

[@andysixxstalkerangeloftrag5833]

Sometimes some people have to choose between a job they really want, or a relationship they want.. She wouldn't be an ahole for choosing the job if that's what she wants more. Everyone needs to remember: it's your life, it's your time, your body, your strength, your mind that goes into both. Life is short. Do what makes you happy.

[@Lestaticate]

Story 2: … I feel for mothers who go through postpartum, but OP’s bio mom had all the time in the world to contact her child, seek therapy, and pay child support. Instead, she decides to start a new life without OP in it and has the audacity to call him his mother and extort money through guilt tripping. I feel sorry for the kid, but OP doesn’t know them. They may share blood, but they’re total strangers. I bio mom will drop OP the second she bleeds him dry. Update: HOOOOOLLY F- those poor kids were bred for organ transplants! Man, some people seriously shouldn’t be parents!

[@nicknitro86]

It's not like he had much choice. Either he stays, gets divorced with the knowledge that his wife chose her career over him, or move with little to no job prospects in a new country even though he didn't want to in the first place. But you know, happy wife happy life and all that.

[@terramarini6880]

I said nope to this particular gem of a saying at the beginning of my marriage. I preferred happy spouse, happy house. We are partners not the others underling, my husband happily agreed with this sentiment.

[@carrissa8867]

Or from the other perspective she gives up on a dream she's always told him she has or compromises with her husband like they did it isn't her fault he chose a career that is obviously dying or more other places would have an equivalent he also wanted to live abroad so that's the only kink in there plans

[@nicknitro86]

Ok, that's irrelevant because she got everything she wanted. They should have just divorced.

[@lilolmecj]

It is for six months! Military families face similar separations every year. Unless becoming a Branch Manager will turn into longer I see this as an obvious she should take the job.

[@nicknitro86]

Ok? And? Deployments are known, upfront, and, for the most part, unavoidable. She changed her mind on him and said there's a possibility of it extending. This means if he stayed and she went, it would be 6 months AT LEAST. These aren't even comparable. Girl bosses love to girl boss until they do it too close to the sun, then lament the outcome.

[@colleens1107]

Story two: egg donor sure does have all of the audacity. Asking the child she abandoned for money for ANOTHER kid. And HOLY SHIT they had two children to be donors for their sick firstborn? Sick

[@GBunnyG]

Story 2: Savior siblings. Oh, that mom is trash.

[@VictoriaWilder13]

Yta commentor on S1 misunderstood. They discussed not having a long distance relationship, not "never working abroad". If he moves with her, it wouldn't be long-distance. I'd say NAH...it's fine for him not to want to move. It is fine for her not to want to stay. They just may need to separate. That said, he'd be TA if he guilted her into staying. Honestly, if you have the chance to live abroad, you should take it. If she makes enough to support them while he tries to build his career, he should go. Just to be able to live abroad is an amazing opportunity. No job is worth missing that, imo. Not when the living is covered anyway.

[@Swnsasy]

This would be a positive thing and it's only 6mths.. He can stay and finish up the things he needs to in order to get his career going. I'm not understanding why he can't do his exams, fly over to his wife while putting in his resume(CV) and then fly back when he gets a job? I'm saying NAH but the second part is that they both promised to not do this again. To him it could make him feel like he's not as important or first..

[@jaycehoward2771]

Because they had already discussed all this and then she bulldozed him to get her way. She is the AH in every conceivable way. Didn't learn anything at all and didn't even apologize. Hopefully hubby realizes he deserves much better.

[@drl5002]

And this won't be the last time. Career is the most important thing to her and family will always take a backseat They'll have kids and a great opportunity will arise and she'll want to uproot the whole family for her career. Op should have stayed single.

[@AngelDeed]

​@@drl5002 what you are describing happens all the time with the genders reversed and nobody bats an eye...

[@thomasjoseph5876]

@@drl5002 I have to doubt the update once again. In the last week, I have seen many of these types of stories that I call The Reddit Two-Step on this channel as well as a few others I watch such as Markee and Lost Genre. It is when the OP tells their original story thinking most of the people will side with them and it turns out very few if any side with them. The OPs are literally decimated in the comments and they get really upset about it. Often, they lash out in the comments and that is where their stories start to "fall apart" and a bit of the truth starts coming out. Then in an update(s) or in this case, an "Edit", the OP either comes up with bad or sketchy behavior about the other person(s) in their original story that they claimed is so awesome which essentially turns the original story upside down. In this case, she walked back her claims of their "never going to do this" discussion that it wasn't "NEVER" it was just not now but later (which is opposite of her claim of how her husband is a "homebody" and not like herself who is "cosmopolitan"). Then in the update, she basically says he "compromised" to her wants and shows all the readers how basically "she was right" about everything. While she was able to do this without really trashing her husband, she did show how she gave up NOTHING and he gave up EVERYTHING just to show how her original plan was the best idea and her husband finally realized it. Sorry, not buying this "Edit" or "Update". I am willing to bet she is going and he will be staying. Also, why would they send a 26-year-old with only a few years in their business to open a new branch when previously she stated that ONLY one of the co-owners would do this job??? It just doesn't make sense they would send someone with limited time on the job vs. themselves or others in the company with much more experience. This whole thing just doesn't pass the smell test when you look at it as a whole.

[@asherikamichaela8425]

​@@AngelDeedIt shouldn't happen at all, regardless of gender. That's kind of the point.

[@TsukiKageTora]

The mom in the second story is the type to parentifying their oldest, having the oldest just to help out with the youngest Update: even worse, they made extra kids to give their healthy organs and stuff to the oldest. CPS worthy?

[@Gungepup]

I was thinking this too... If OP has that particular bit of info in written form, something that could be submitted as evidence, I would think that would be the way to go. If those kids were brought into the world for the sole purpose of being donors, they need to be rescued.

[@johnbradbury8610]

Thats why I couldn't believe OP actually asked AITA for not giving her money. There are a lot of Nigerian prices that would love to meet OP.

[@Sherwoody]

@@johnbradbury8610 Ethiopian princes are mainly interested in Sephora gift cards.

[@Yume10605]

Sadly CPS doesn't see people having babies as Savior Siblings as child abuse. And this sounds like op's biomom and stepdad even went the cheap rout of savior siblings but just having the kids naturally and had fingers crossed. Cause I. The really F'd up savior siblings they parents will have do invitro and have the embros tested for genetic matches to the sick child before they are implanted into the mother.

[@ettinakitten5047]

@@Gungepup CPS isn't going to decide custody based on the motivation for conceiving a child. They're going to care how the child is actually being treated now. Plenty of people could choose to have a child for less-than-ideal reasons and still end up loving that child deeply and providing good care to them. We really have no idea what those kids' lives are like, since OP doesn't know them at all.

[@dan_mer]

Story 1: OP is godawful. That's it. Desperately looking for some way to accuse her husband of being controlling so she could end the marriage. Please release the poor man.

[@dandotvid]

Story 1: "Life is about balance and compromise" BS, you're getting everything you want and screw what your husband really wants. I don't buy for a second that he's suddenly excited about moving and was just moody because "I have to think about my exams".

[@kimberlyclark5757]

I actually think things worked out great for story #1. It’s only for 6 months, her husband gets to take his exam first(his biggest concern) so he’ll have his career set and he now has 6 months to find the best job offer when they return, also he can gain experience in another country(which will look great on a resume) and they get 6 months of experiences in a country he wants to spend time in. When they return her salary will be 3x what it currently is and he’ll be ready to accept a job he was able to find the best offer in. Hopefully this will set them both up for a successful professional and personal life together!!❤❤❤❤❤

[@veezopolis]

The comment after the update was correct, this is all for Jerry but she calls it compromise. He still agreed to it so whatever but realize what's happening

[@pinkesthibiscus]

Been excitedly waiting for something to listen to! 😊 happy saturday everyone.

[@jakeand9020]

"compromise" She gets whatever she wants, he deals with it.

[@HobieInTheBox]

Mark videos are the highlight of my day, thank you Mark ❤

[@maxinemyers9215]

Thanks for all the updated stories Mark💐

[@tooblessed8815]

S2: I’m a very hateful/vengeful person who would have replied “I will send you a sympathy card the value of the ONLY birthday card you sent me wrapped up in a restraining order for you and those harassing me if you don’t stop it all right now!” I don’t deal well with scammers and flying monkeys. The high road has a traffic jam so I’m taking the low road all day with these kinds of people. I will even bring a shovel to dig it lower if they keep it up.

[@brentbradly8629]

So I am listening to the 2nd story, mom left when I was 2....later Mom says she left because of PPD, I was like over 2 years later and still suffering from PPD?! I did a quick search ,"Because PPD can appear anywhere from a couple of weeks to 12 months after birth, there's no average length of time it lasts. A 2014 review of studies suggests that PPD symptoms improve over time, with many cases of depression resolving 3 to 6 months after they begin." So gonna say my gut reaction was right, no PPD here, just a bad human

[@LadyWolvie82]

For S1, I'm going with NAH. One of the comments pointed out that regardless of what choice is made, it's a clear sign that the relationship is likely going to fall apart due to incompatibility on a fundamental basis for both sides.

[@ScragsP22]

Story 1: OP sounds insufferable. It’s not like she wasn’t answering and/or seeing some comments. She saw them and answered a bunch but no matter how many times someone pointed out how unreasonable/selfish it was of her to act indignant that her husband didn’t become overjoyed at her news she answers with some bland non answer that doesn’t even acknowledge that truth. She also did the same when it was pointed out that she never apologized to her husband for her selfishness and unfair expectations. She was seconds away from ditching her husband for a job but he cut her off by being selfless. She clearly doesn’t deserve him at all. I hope he stays put, gets a good job he studied and worked so hard for then finds someone who will actually appreciate him and I don’t know….possibly take his happiness into consideration as well.

[@J-tron-ke2fn]

At least, the voice of truth! Agree to a tee

[@matheusbarbo]

Not gonna lie, when OP said the thing about "compromise" I laughed out loud. Compromise is always fun when there's only one person folding to your demands. The husband just folded because he knew she was gonna choose the job over him if it came down to it. He showed he loves her more than he loves his career, and the opposite can't be said about OP.

[@hilaryc3203]

Historically, men have travelled for their jobs. They have travelled world wide on projects in their fields, which resulted in them being away from their families for months at a time, and still do of course. That is widely accepted because......they are men, and women were simply expected to accept it. Fast forward to today's world where women are, and have been, making their mark in the world with their careers and when their jobs take them away from home, suddenly it's a problem and they're in the wrong. Pfft.

[@AngelDeed]

If the genders were reversed, people would say this is normal, and the guy is a hero for providing....

[@thomasjoseph5876]

I have to doubt the update once again. In the last week, I have seen many of these types of stories that I call The Reddit Two-Step on this channel as well as a few others I watch such as Markee and Lost Genre. It is when the OP tells their original story thinking most of the people will side with them and it turns out very few if any side with them. The OPs are literally decimated in the comments and they get really upset about it. Often, they lash out in the comments and that is where their stories start to "fall apart" and a bit of the truth starts coming out. Then in an update(s) or in this case, an "Edit", the OP either comes up with bad or sketchy behavior about the other person(s) in their original story that they claimed is so awesome which essentially turns the original story upside down. In this case, she walked back her claims of their "never going to do this" discussion that it wasn't "NEVER" it was just not now but later (which is opposite of her claim of how her husband is a "homebody" and not like herself who is "cosmopolitan"). Then in the update, she basically says he "compromised" to her wants and shows all the readers how basically "she was right" about everything. While she was able to do this without really trashing her husband, she did show how she gave up NOTHING and he gave up EVERYTHING just to show how her original plan was the best idea and her husband finally realized it. Sorry, not buying this "Edit" or "Update". I am willing to bet she is going and he will be staying. Also, why would they send a 26-year-old with only a few years in their business to open a new branch when previously she stated that ONLY one of the co-owners would do this job??? It just doesn't make sense they would send someone with limited time on the job vs. themselves or others in the company with much more experience. This whole thing just doesn't pass the smell test when you look at it as a whole.

[@matheusbarbo]

@@hilaryc3203 she's not wrong for wanting to go and focus on her career, and he's also not wrong for feeling slided when she does something they agreed they wouldn't do anymore. The part where she's an AH is not resolving the issue and considering it's done when he folds and gives everything she wanted. That's a relationship doomed from the start.

[@matheusbarbo]

@@AngelDeed a guy uprooting his wife's life and damaging her career by doing something he promised he wouldn't do anymore? Yeah right, he would've been treated way worse than her, would be called abusive and controlling and everyone would say she deserves better and needs to get a divorce asap.

[@roserocks1979]

First story me, me, me, me.

[@iteruc3071]

Story 1 wrapped up way too nicely for OP. The backtracking with the first edit, which was a very important point to mention initially, is suspiscious as well. I don't believe it worked out this way at all - I think she's lying because she was the AH and doesn't want to accept it.

[@bhutehole]

Accountability is kyoptonite to some people

[@datmanydocris]

@@bhutehole Especially based on my experience a lot of millennial and Gen Z women.

[@GeorgeGiann]

Story 1: it’s only a matter of time. Unless she starts thinking.

[@raptoress6131]

Story 1: I'm happy for them, this is a one-time opportunity for her, and she'd regret it if she didn't take it.

[@paden1865able]

Thing is, she stopped being your mom or a part of the family when she left you. Sure, I understand PPD, but she never sought treatment for it so she could come back. You were adopted by your step mom, which means the egg donor gave up all parental rights to you and she was replaced on your birth certificate. Not going to say a word about savior siblings, but humans ought to be brought into the world as more than just spare parts for someone else.

[@Sherwoody]

She’s not just a bad mom, she’s a rotten human being.

[@telinhajp]

Good afternoon, Mark and Poppy! Wishing you both have a joyful weekend! ❤️🤗

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

🧇🧇💜💜🤗🤗🧇🧇💜💜🤗🤗🧇🧇💜💜🤗🤗

[@july_paradox3094]

I was going to say NAH until she mentioned they agreed to not do the long work trips again. It is perfectly reasonable that the partner wants to stay and build a career especially when it only valid in their country. Having a 6 month gap in his resume and not doing anything productive for his career during that time is so unfair for him. The OP is really only thinking about herself instead of her partner's need. When you are in a partnership, some sacrifices has to be made. Spontaneous work abroad trips is not feasible for some people and unfortunately for OP her partner is one of those people. What pisses me off more is she is changing a lot of details in the update. Fundamentally, YTA.

[@icecreamthedog1271]

The last story gave me My Sister's Keeper vibes. No, I haven't seen the whole movie, but hearing this made my think of that movie

[@jimmyjohnjuan]

Story 1) she said, she's upset he's mad and doesn't want to talk. No, you already talked and your going back on what you agreed. She heavily backtrack and restated so much to make her look better lol Also heavy on the copium when she said he's happy and thinking about all the places they would go. No he decided he would sacrifice something for her.

[@ZombieMinion1992]

I really hope the husband in Story1 actually is excited to move to this country they’re going to. I think not telling us which country they’re going to is useful but not important I think really the only thing that changed for the husband was the fact that his degree wasn’t applicable outside of their home country, aside from that he could gain a lot from going to another country. Think of it like a six month vacation because he really seems determined that it only be six months.

[@BlackhatSpb]

Look at it from another perspective, you will have to go to another country where your degree is not recognized, where you probably don't speak the language well, which means you won't find a good job there. Your wife on the other hand has secured a good position there, and given the job she has been offered, she will most likely be offered a contract extension after 6 months. How quickly do you think this relationship will start to crack? Either because the wife will not be satisfied with what the husband is contributing to the marriage, or because the husband is not happy that he gave up his career for his wife.

[@eveliinahannele]

​​@@BlackhatSpbit's 6 months, stop being so dramatic, he hasn't given up anything

[@ettinakitten5047]

@@eveliinahannele He *thinks* it'll just be 6 months. It sounds like that'll only turn out true if OP does poorly at the new job.

[@onurkneezb]

Story 1: only 2 minutes in and I can already see this not working out for them, regardless of what OP chooses to do...

[@Jenifer_R_]

"Saviour Siblings" is such a nicer term than "Organ Bags".

[@melsolomon8256]

story 2 I feel sorry for the youngest two kids. what kind of life have they had with those two as parents mad at them for not saving the sick child.

[@jacobsmith-hi6ey]

As someone who's worked abroad for over 20 years having a long term relationship based around that is nearly impossible especially with such different career goals. I missed months of my children's lives, holidays with family, and just the life I thought I wanted.

[@lilolmecj]

On post one, six months is such a short time period. The previous comparison was three years. Six months passes so quickly I can barely call it a long distance relationship.

[@asherikamichaela8425]

Ngl, I don't think the first story is going to end well. OP sees herself as more "cosmopolitan" and her husband as more "domestic." She can't seem to sit still for any real length of time, whereas he's looking to put down roots somewhere. As much as they seem to love each other, their life goals are still wildly different. Worse yet, there's talk of bringing kids into this mess. Speaking as someone who grew up in a similarly "nomadic" family (though we always stayed in the same country) and with a workaholic mother who had virtually zero interest in being a real parent, 0/10 would not recommend. Just don't do that a child. Children need stability, friends, familiarity, support. You can't get that when you essentially live out of a suitcase and and see half the country (or planet) before you even turn five. Not to say that OP is wrong for wanting that "jet-setting" lifestyle, but she has to understand that it's not conducive to a committed relationship unless your partner is of a similar mindset with similar goals. Story 2. Holy shit, OP's bio mom and her new family (kids aside) suck. They just want to use OP and the younger half sibs, too. Just... wow. What a vile human. 🤢🤮😡🤬 Maybe the siblings can have a relationship after everyone is free of those assholes, but right now.... yikes.

[@shebakoby]

last story: OP's biomom and stepdad are narcissists.

[@GrillinPiratePete]

So after two other times, you told him you did not want to live apart anymore. Then less than a year later, you tell him you are moving again. So you lied to him. He is realizing the two of you don’t have the same goals. He is looking to set roots and start a family. You are wanting to continue to live like single (with no responsibilities). Just break up now. Don’t torment him with the I inevitable affair that happens while you abroad (claiming that in a moment of weakness when your you felt your needs were not being met - you had a four month mistake). Bonus, here’s another man’s baby for him to raise.

[@KadeStringer2.0]

Op didn’t lie

[@jackchop1576]

@@KadeStringer2.0Markee is the "all women are heroes" story page.

[@GiordanDiodato]

@@jackchop1576 ok misogynist

[@persephoneszeliga]

OP did not lie. She changed her mind because circumstances changed. What’s 6 months? That’s not long at all. WTH.

[@danielqueiroz4235]

​​@@persephoneszeligawhat is the value of her word if it is only valid as long as it is convenient? What is the point of a promise if you only gonna keep it if you want to do it?

[@andersrkeness2721]

Story 2: (Before Update) HELL NO! NOT AH! OP mom abandoned them and came back only to get money for her other child..... OP egg donor should just go away and play happy life with her new family, she is trying to taking advantage of OP. Her and the new family can find a way themselves to pay the bills. (After Update) "Savior Kids".... getting 2 MORE kids just to try and save the "first"...... I have no word for this.

[@TeacupHeart]

Story 2: If they want money from a stranger they should set up a go fund me.

[@shutdown117]

For story one, my dad gave me a piece of advice when I got older. He's been working at a AC factory for almost 20 years. When the younger employees ask him how could he do that for 20 years? Doesn't it get boring? Tell him I don't do this job because I enjoy it or is my life I do it because I can do the things that I want to do and enjoy. Don't let your job define your purpose or your meaning they're just things that you do so you can do the things that bring you purpose. To OP and first story, the greatest thing in your life isn't your job is your marriage and your husband. end of the day the job doesn't care if you get sick or die. But your husband is always there. Don't lose him for an opportunity when you had the biggest opportunity standing in front of you when you married him.

[@muhname6052]

Last story: are we just going to ignore that they had two extra kids for spare parts?

[@lorrainemontagnon1537]

Goodmorning waffle gang! Here is hoping everyone has a great day! Keep them coming Mark!

[@broken_queer_but_fighting8589]

🤗🤗💜💜🧇🧇

[@TwozySauce27]

How disgusting is that "we had two more kids for body parts and they didn't match" I just can't believe people sometimes.

[@user-blob]

Everyone in S2 saying the biomum is disgusting for producing 2 more children for immoral reasons is delusional. EVERYONE who insists on breeding does so because of their own selfish desires.

[@brie1162]

15:58 When Mark read the title, I though it was going to be the step mom/bio dad demanding OP pay for his half/step sisters bills. In any case, NTA, but that egg donor!!! What the what’s!?! And where the hell was ALLLLLL the egg donors family when OP was growing up? Do they know she abandoned him, do they know she contributed NOTHING to his life, are they aware she made ZERO effort (save the one card) to be in his life UNTIL she WANTED something from him? I wonder what story she fed the family and husband about why OP won’t help and ooooh how I wish OP could go nuclear on her and blow her world apart with back child support and exposing her horrid behavior

[@sugakookie7985]

Mother in last story probably treats her last two children as what they were spare parts, sickening soulless people shouldn't breed.

[@bhutehole]

Those are the types to breed the most

[@user-blob]

Nobody should breed.

[@PinkMarshmallows]

Story 1: YTA, if you go down this road. Sure, you can do it, but if you do, file for divorce before you say yes to the new job. Update: The husband is going to resent OP for this move, even though he said "Let's go". I hope he wants to move because HE wants to and to not appease OP. This marriage is going to end BADLY.

[@eveliinahannele]

It's 6 months, stop being so dramatic

[@fandomfan2800]

@@eveliinahannele men be like that lol

[@trevorseitz502]

First story: op is the AH she made a commitment and agreed to not go abroad again.

[@n.e9831]

Story 2 - i wonder how those "family" members on biomums side are contributing to the medical bills.. the entitlement is wild...

[@FanFicnic]

Marriage is about compromise. I appreciate that he came to her with conditions. Also I think the comments are missing that she makes significantly more money. He’s choosing to support the upward trajectory of her career. Nothing wrong with that.

[@seankeller1560]

She doesn't want a long distance relationship she wants the husband to follow along like a puppy at the whims of her career

[@n.e9831]

Story 1 - it was only for 6 months.. I don't see what the issue is? She didn't accept the job straight away and gave hubby a few days to think about it and he also wants to go. I don't understand why he would have to move as well for only 6 months and its only a 2 hr flight away. Some people blow things out of proportion lol

[@TransbelleGwen]

Are you gonna give up years of education because i doubt it’ll be just 6 months

[@Fenrislokisonsuncut]

People are just not realistic anymore, telling people to follow their dreams at the risk of healthy positive relationships is not a good thing especially when it was something talked about before and agreed upon to not do again I.e moving abroad

[@reviewsgoodnbad7695]

Story 1: leave your husband there for 6 months and come back. It’s 6 months.180 days. He has to be comfortable with you doing that though - so need to take his feelings into account. This is a decision you’d need to make together

[@davidnash8208]

OP in story one really moved the goalposts in her update.

[@maurer3d]

Story 1 (before update): Well in a healthy relationship you would look at the pros and cons. How much more money would you be making? What is the job market like for your husband in the new area? Will your increase in pay more than offset any reduction in pay for him? Will moving require him to go back to school for qualifications to work in the new country? These are things you and him need to talk about, like a married couple, and make an informed and agreed upon decision. Either that or you should get a divorce and move on.

[@PuppyKatt]

Story 2: Block her on everything, including your phone. She does not want to be your mother, but she does want you to be her ATM. Please, do not let her use you like this. She is married, with a husband. She can get a job, and she and her husband can pay for THEIR daughter's medical expenses. Don't do it, PLEASE.

[@RaptureInRed]

Tell me you weren't ready to get married without telling me you weren't ready to get married

[@MrAlwaysOnTen]

8:01 so due to her childhood she doesn’t know commitment or truly can’t call one place home

[@taz598]

Story 1 Am I the only one who doesn't see this marriage lasting long term? OP is career obsessed and thats ok but working long hours constantly traveling and moving comes at a cost. Husband is going to figure out soon enough that you can't raise kids like that and unless OP is willing to sacrifice part of that career to make a family with him I don't see that marriage lasting.

[@whitehawk7082]

Story 1: people who are so incompatible at the outset, shouldn’t be together at all.

[@samssams666]

The last story reminds me of My Sisters Keeper