I wish every INFJ could watch this.

[@HauntedTube00]

When I speak to people they think I mean something else or I’m stupid, when in reality I’m speaking from all aspects of the situation and others don’t understand me. I can not relate to 99% of this world

[@INFJcircle]

Oh how much I agree Bea. Great way of putting it. The big picture vs. the tiny "duties" - seeing the whole thing makes life tough. Great comment. Jay

[@johnathonsandler9507]

Much love. I feel ya

[@nakulbaliga]

To be Frank, I don't relate to anyone. I feel very alone all the time. Sometimes when I tell people something, they assume I'm speaking out of stupidity or I'm arrogant. I'm misunderstood all the time. How can I tell them that I cannot possibly explain what's in my mind and what thought process went through and what probabilities of a situation I have thought of in that short moment of time? I'll be outcast or even better I'll be defined as a psycho! So better I keep my thoughts to myself Thank you!! 😂 I understand what people resembling me might go through, every living moment is a lot of pain to endure! My mind is soo heavy from all this thinking.

[@Xandrous_Drumz]

@@nakulbaliga You need self confidence. Humility and control. And be aware of those who try to manipulate you or make fun of you. Don't be real shy and make friends.

[@Xandrous_Drumz]

@@nakulbaliga As an INFJ similar to you. I always try to understand people and be kind and loyal to them or simply polite 'cause they can be in a situation where everyone can't understand them but they also suffer. If I can't understand them then I just let them do what they want as long as it's not bad and it's doesn't affect others. I'll just be polite to them so that they'd see me as a trustable man.

[@jennifera777]

"It's ok to feel old and wise, yet young and naive at the same time."

[@INFJcircle]

:) Jay

[@michaelaoren7058]

"You are not responsible for other people's feelings" is literally a mantra my therapist tells me to repeat to myself - INFJ

[@INFJcircle]

Yes, I read that a while back and it really stuck with me. Great mantra! Jay

[@animesstories6160]

I'm INFJ. Meditation is the best way to INFJ balance yourselves. Mindfulness.

[@RealityCheck1]

I am not responsible for your feelings. You are also not responsible for mine. It goes both ways.

[@Kiarilk]

Oop. I have a feeling my therapist would tell me the same.

[@faijuljoni8946]

Infj i am 😢

[@winnerosaigbovo4527]

I started crying listening to this. Being an infj-t can be really overwhelming. I love being an infj but sometimes i fear I'm just gonna be in my head alone forever. I love too deep, i care too much, im so so sensitive and jezzz my head could blow up from how much thoughts i have. I pray all infjs find someone who can help them ease all these pains.

[@INFJcircle]

All of our situations are unique, but your feelings are familiar to me. Stay strong and connected with us on here. Thanks for sharing. Jay

[@Jimberley]

Very much understand your feelings, it is difficult but we got this 😊

[@My.family.ismylife]

Same, I can literally relate because I, myself am an INFJ-t

[@philippattersongideon5748]

INFJ-T over here too

[@muma6559]

same. Trying not to cry..

[@adamslaura768]

I am an INFJ and a “highly sensitive person”. I learned that there is also this “highly sensitive person” category of personality type and it makes much of these intuitive feelings that much more intense. The hardest thing about being INFJ is being a deep relational being in a world that is satisfied with superficiality.

[@INFJcircle]

Great point Laura. Yes, the more sensitive you are the more it hurts dealing with this world. I wish you the best and hope to chat more with you in the future! Thanks for the excellent comment. Jay

[@creatorsonthecrest]

Yes Laura! 100% agree. I am INFJ and a HSP as well. I’ve had to learn how to pristinely protect my energy systems while frequent self-care methods. This video is an amazing summary! Thank you INFJ circle! 💯

[@INFJcircle]

You are welcome! :) Jay

[@DraconiInfernalus]

me too :D

[@Xandrous_Drumz]

I am not sensitive but I am polite and loyal to a person like you! I'm also an INFJ not sensitive but really shy and low self confidence. But yeah.

[@KeysToUnity369]

I love being an INFJ, authentic, honest, creative, not afraid to stand for the truth, compassionate, not fake in anyway, very wise, good common sense, not afraid of be alone, wanting the best for others, very talented, live life to the fullest. I am 71 years old, BE PROUD OF BEEING AN INFJ, there is only a few of us - DIFFERENT IS GOOD

[@fowchiiiliedpuppiesdied]

We get better with age, don’t we?

[@elainemcglynn9665]

So uplifting, thank you 😊

[@ladydivine4444]

Absolute truth! 🤍🔱✨

[@Douudu]

Do we get to form fullfilling relationships at some point? I’m tired of people trying to manipulate me…

[@sweetlynn9054]

As an INFJ I always feel like everything is my responsability

[@INFJcircle]

Yes, that’s normal - but something we can work on. Thanks for watching! Jay

[@sjbchase4766]

I don't know any other INFJs. I wish we had a support group. Being misunderstood at every turn in life can be so..... exhausting

[@INFJcircle]

Oh I agree, it's very tiring. I am planning some stuff around this channel, so stick around for the future ;) Jay

[@RichaS1111]

I feel same.

[@riyajacob2909]

​@@INFJcircle,group for our tribe?

[@INFJcircle]

@@riyajacob2909 I see it as a tribe, YES! There is a Facebook group if you aren't in it already Rya, look it up and let me know if you have trouble finding it.

[@kalinadesseaux8011]

I deeply want an infj support group. I was once a part of one online but it dissolved and I genuinely miss it

[@INFJparadox]

I would have saved myself so many years and trauma had I known I was an INFJ when I was young. Once I began educating myself on being an INFJ, I felt so much better about myself. We are the narcissist's favorite prey. My mother was a narcissist, the *father of my child, and a bf abusive in every way. I have also had horrible job experiences thanks to evil people. I could have been six feet under so many times. Thank you for this video! New subbie 🥰

[@INFJcircle]

Yes, great way to put it - the favorite prey of the narcissist. I was in a relationship with one for about 10 years - so sorry about your experiences. It is tough to grow up under those circumstances. Grateful you are here and have subscribed! Thanks for the comment (and sub)! Jay

[@HeyokaCat_8]

Same !!!!

[@susanzoefelix6631]

I only found this out aged 62. It has been so helpful to understand myself and my life retrospectively

[@misty7220]

Duuuude. This hits hard.

[@ronchimzimu5431]

Me too!

[@brandonmiles8174]

Thank you. Love you, all my fellow INFJs. You're beautiful people, even if you can never find someone that will love you with the intensity you want to love them, and even if nobody around you can possibly even fathom how much you care. Even if you overthink, and feel like you need to stop being around everyone to catch your breath. You're not alone, just more complex than most people can begin to understand.

[@INFJcircle]

Brandon, that is a great comment my friend. We all here agree and feel the pain. Thanks for your insight. Hope to talk more in the future. Jay

[@dragonfox2.058]

OH I'm pretty sure I'm alone...there's no one here😎

[@margaritakleinman5701]

Every word of your excellent comment is very relatable to me, it is exactly what I experience, and I am an ENFP! Just probably a bit more extroverted than an INFJ, but very similar in many ways.

[@brandonmiles8174]

@@margaritakleinman5701 I love my ENFPs, you all make it easy to be comfortable just being alive. Thank you ❤️

[@margaritakleinman5701]

@@brandonmiles8174 Thank you, that's very kind of you to say, love you sensitive caring INFJ's too!

[@kimbo7777]

This world can make you feel like you are wrong for just being who you are.

[@INFJcircle]

Sure can Kim, and that's so sad. Hang in there! Jay

[@fowchiiiliedpuppiesdied]

Because it terrifies them to believe people can actually be “good”. They are so self absorbed, and enveloped in self pity, they think everyone else is as pathetic as they are.

[@ThePaintedHope]

I don't agree with that.

[@AmyK007]

I’ve never felt a part of this world. I feel and think things so deeply. I really don’t fit in because my mind is on a different level. I can’t do superficial.

[@DragonwaveOG]

Most people can’t do superficial but they do it cuz they don’t know better

[@Rosepetalpearls]

@@DragonwaveOGsome people are just superficial. INFJ is the deepest.

[@user-NOYB_2016]

I feel a part of the world when I'm alone, but everything else feels fake and forced.

[@mavywavy801]

As an Infj myself, i appreciate how you cut through the heart of the matter in this.

[@INFJcircle]

Thanks MAVEM, I appreciate you watching. I think this one helped me as much at the viewers. We do need that reminder that we are not "weird," we are INFJ's! Jay

[@intuativefiha5771]

@@INFJcircle Thank u very much. I do say sometimes that I m weird a freak and a martian(alien). But I appretiate myself like that way.

[@INFJcircle]

@@intuativefiha5771 Yeah, I think we all feel that way because we are indeed different. But I don't want us (me included) to put a negative connotation on it. It's hard sometimes though. Jay

[@hapennysparrow]

You just defined my entire life. I am 74 and have walked through everything you have just stated. I have permission to just be me. Aloneness has become a companion, and I treasure it. I have always been a misfit, and no longer feel that something is wrong with me. I get to be myself and thank God for creating me just as I am. This video is so helpful. Thanks.

[@INFJcircle]

So great to hear from you Leilani. You are welcome! I too like to be alone most of the time. I think it is inherent in our INFJ nature. I think it is great that there are sources of information now for people. Just 20 years ago there was not a lot to inform us INFJs that we were a certain personality type. Thanks so much for watching and I hope to hear more from you in the future. Jay

[@hapennysparrow]

I especially found the phrase old and wise, and young and naive descriptive. Just this morning I was ruminating on an encounter a few years ago with my highly narcissistic daughter in law, who was cruel and rude, and how it left me feeling guilty that I did not answer her with silence and just walk away. But, no, I tried to explain myself, trying to make myself understood, which was ridiculously ineffective, and felt humiliated. Today,after hearing you say that we are free not to feel guilt over another's rudeness lifted the shame from me. The rudeness was on her, not on me. I was meant to hear this today, for this memory has haunted me, and now I have been empowered to away from it. Feels so good after beating myself up for it.

[@INFJcircle]

YES Leilani! I have done this so often too. Just shows how much you care, but that is not your responsibility. Free yourself from others misbehavior. I'm so glad it helped you! Jay

[@mysterical-]

And thank you for coming this far! - from a younger INFJ. I now feel more content with aloneness. I bet you have so much inner wisdom built up that you don't even know it yet until it's needed.

[@aasiyaiddeen3099]

Hapennyspstrow hi in there😊 My sentiments as well. This world has been a jokester and I haven't found it funny. I'm 73 and have been waiting for these worldly narratives to change. Instead it's constantly looping. Exhausting, boring and frustrated because of lack of compassion and understanding from this world. I came to assist with love. The funny part is...... I didn't know I was coming to a loveless planet of habitants. WE are the best to get this mission DONE. I told/ask the HEAVENS, I AM not leaving until it's complete. I didn't come this far to lay down now. I won't be coming back here.

[@HauntedTube00]

So many think I’m “rude” and I do absolutely nothing to them. Maybe cuz I don’t smile at them? Maybe I don’t ask them how they are? Maybe cuz I’m not FAKE like the rest? I think they’re the ones that have the issue! I will continue to stay true to myself and values and disregard the ones that are disrespectful in this world

[@Heykay34]

Once hit 27 I got into the habit of only speaking when actually wanted or when it’s genuine. Life has been better that pressure to continue small talk, POOF! 😅

[@mithrandirpilgrim1419]

This genuinely made me tear up. For so long, I've always been made to feel like an outcast (weird, clumsy, extreme, slow, bizarre or dumb) no matter where I go. I just can't fit in no matter how hard I try. And how my sense of care is constantly frustrated. Like how I am also not supposed to speak with "wizardlike" wisdom nor have that "childlike" wonder. How I wish I could just go to some deserted island or planet. Thank you, I needed to hear this. Something different from the usual criticism of people regarding my personality...

[@weekendatbernies2265]

Most ppl have calcified pineal glands and have no conscience, 💀👾👽👀

[@lori-annefay4138]

Hang in there. I have a statement I taped up on my mirror some years ago. It just says, "Never forget, you were never supposed to fit in, you were born to stand out!" Lot's of time no one appreciates me, loves me, or wants to know me. But I've learned to be my own best friend. I have a tight relationship with "Divine Source Energy". I can make myself laugh and I have previously had deep connections in the past and may do again. I'm telling you all this so you can know to spite all the odds against us, we can find a way to inner peace and happiness. Think of us like the human form of Snow Leopards or Tigers. We're just not average. So everday find more things you love about you and let go of those who can't seem to share your opinion. 😊

[@SearchForTruth1111]

I am right there with you. It has been a struggle since I was a child. Just know, I can be your friend if you’d like. I only wish I could find people close by that I could trust and enjoy.❤

[@cajunlady4893]

"Stop being childish! Grow up!" "Grow thick skin" "Where is that coming from?" What makes you think that or who told you that?" I reply... I am like Peter Pan. I will never grow old. Fly with me. I will show you many wonderful things you see not. They🙄🤯 I 😀😇 😁😁😁😁

[@juhirawr]

"Sometimes you don't fit in because you're meant to stand out" remember that ! And breathe, my friend ❤

[@sadieratliff2401]

When he said, "You are not alone." I literally teared up. I am INFJ/HSP. When I read Elaine Arons book, It was like reading a book about myself. I HATE that no one in my life can have deep conversations or understand the depth of perception and processing that I live with on a daily basis. It is self isolating. This world the way it is set up is not set up for us. The normal commute to work is the worst part of my day. The fact that NOTHING can be simple these days. Nothing. It is exhausting.

[@Heykay34]

😭 I feel this. Life could be so simple and peaceful it’s so easy I wish the world would just get with the program. Who made this a monopoly game 🤦🏽‍♀️ we literally just need love, food, water and shelter which are free 😅. Money doesn’t have to be the motivation for innovation to happen in the world; helping individuals focus on what they are actually interested in will be the driver to innovate technology for the greater good of the human race. I feel like this way of living can change in one day if everyone thought like us. ITS SIMPLE🤷🏽‍♀️

[@jpc3984]

I’m an INFJ and I can say that while this video is great, you need to learn to be less emotional on a day to day basis. The only thing that deserves your emotional attention is your family, and yourself. You need to approach the world logically, and with reason. Not emotion. Use the emotion when needed, but otherwise save your energy. It’s not worth your time, keep people accountable for there actions, don’t let them bring you down. Take a note from INTJs. We’re very similar, just a little more caring.

[@INFJcircle]

JP, I see your point. You are right, INFJ's do need to switch that emotion off (or at least turn it down) and learn a bit from INTJs. You make some insightful points, we do need to stop wasting energy and caring so much about every little thing. Thanks for this comment - what you say is very true! Jay

[@sayusayme7729]

Thank you

[@jeannined7532]

Wow, this is great advice. It sounds like something an INTJ would say to us. I wonder if it's the introverted intuition that INTJ shares with INFJ that makes it so much easier to take in. The few INTJ's I've known (they are also pretty rare types), see through the b..lsh..t to core issues, so I always have felt more understod by them. I still listen to my own insight, but in general, I feel more known by these types and therefore more likely to model their capacity to stand back from drowning in the emotional wreckage that I tend to see all around me. Thank you for reminding me of the value of my emotional energy and to stop dissipating it on things that cannot be changed. BTW, I've known two married couples who were infj/intj. INTJ seem like cold fish to a lot of people, but the healthy INFJ sees beneath that and is happy loving the Fi child in the INTJ while the INTJ provides much needed modelling of equanimity for the INFJ.

[@evei11]

This is so true my husband is an intj

[@CedarSageSweetgrassTobacco]

Switching between autonomous and emotional thinking.. responding vs reacting… is a skill any personality can learn

[@mimimo555]

As an ENFP, I want to better understand and appreciate my INFJ loved one!

[@INFJcircle]

I commend you on that Margo, that's a very selfless thing to do👏. We all need to be open to learning about others. Jay

[@Artnotforthesakeofart]

A very ENFP thing to say! We, INFJs love you guys 🫶

[@erikam9519]

You are truly special for going out of your way to understand us INFJ’s. Thank you

[@fowchiiiliedpuppiesdied]

We love you. You are always there for us. ❤❤❤to ENFPs -INFJ

[@luvlyr5631]

We INFJs sometimes feel guilty because other people mistreat us. I'm an INFJ and I was just suffering from a situation like this that made me doubt myself. I really needed to hear those words, I appreciate how you made me feel understood, thank you a lot. ❤

[@INFJcircle]

You are welcome. This happens to me regularly. Glad this video helped you! Jay

[@whatisthat1585]

I am an INFJ, and I literally need to hear this because I feel sometimes I'm freak, different, and all bad things is my fault. Thank you and love you my fellow INFJ❤

[@INFJcircle]

We must love each other because, yes, life is hard for the INFJ's of the world. But we can stick together and understand each other - and we can know our worth. Thanks for watching, you are not a freak, and you're not alone :) Jay

[@Chill-mm4pn]

You are unique, don't let those thoughts knock you down.❤

[@INFJcircle]

@@Chill-mm4pn Exactly!

[@andreahugentobler1510]

INFJ here... I truly had tears in my eyes watching this. I often feel so alone. THANKS for this video❤️

[@INFJcircle]

You are welcome Andrea. I feel like that quite a bit too. But you aren't alone, there are more of us out there. :) Jay

[@pinkyssj4]

I feel, every person I allow myself to be vulnerable with, I get betrayed. I just can't trust anyone anymore.

[@kachowtime]

I'm an ENFP and some of my closest friends and my ex partner were INFJs. Just wanted to show up and say I love y'all; you bring so much depth, intensity, and thoughtfulness into what you do. You are also enigmatic and interesting and I never tire from talking with you guys! Keep being misfits; the world needs more independent thinkers not more sheep :)

[@hustlemami8732]

Your comment made me cry. Thank you sincerely for sharing your comment. I deeply appreciate it. It's so lonely. Your comment means thr world to me. Hugs

[@VivBeyer1111]

@@hustlemami8732 I love you. You are a beautiful, precious being ! I feel your pain and your loneliness. Hugs to you too! 🧡

[@fowchiiiliedpuppiesdied]

We love you guys. You are always a safe place for us, thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for loving us back.

[@raerae2885]

Aww I’m pretty sure my little girl is an ENFP and she brings all the spice to my life, and I think my ENFP bestie in middle school might have actually saved my life.

[@NyxLuna452]

Really needed to hear this today. thank you~blessings to all fellow INFJ that feel like aliens in the world.

[@INFJcircle]

Thank you Brittanie! Blessings you you and thanks for watching! Jay

[@ameliawilson2756]

🙌 Blessings right back sweetheart 💖

[@underdoggys5415]

One thing I have learnt recently is the need to let others make mistakes. This is actually a boundary we need on ourselves, otherwise we focus so much on playing parent to others who are mature enough to make their own decisions. We feel we are driven to teach, however recently I found myself trying too hard to show the new guys how to watch for this and don’t make the same mistake I did etc etc etc. , when I pulled my head in, I felt I was able to dignify them as grown ups.

[@INFJcircle]

I relate to what you are saying so much. This is one of my biggest issues. I agree, we have to make a boundary. Thanks so much for your comment! Jay

[@zoesdream]

This is so true. As my bf says “do not take away from them, their learning.” I’ve also had to humble myself and make peace with the fact that everyone has a right to make their own choices, even if those choices appear to be painful - the greater act of love is not to come in and save or teach, but rather to let people be as they are!

[@rodny25]

for most of my life i felt like ``what is wrong with me`` and then i did the test and i literal almost cried.... caus i realized thats how i am "i´m not a freak, thats how i am"... since then my life is gettin better and i can focus on my strenghts :)

[@INFJcircle]

Thank you for the insightful comment - I completely understand where you are coming from. I had that overwhelming emotion as well when I found out. It just suddenly explains so much :) Thanks for your comment and welcome! I hope to chat with you more in the future! Jay

[@shdow1843]

Same, i always feel like something is wrong with me... 🥺

[@INFJcircle]

@@shdow1843 I think we just have to realize we are who we are. We can work on it and improve, but we'll always be an INFJ! Jay

[@joanthecrow900]

Ditto darling heart 😁💚🌈

[@zoeyjennum-qx8zu]

As an INFJ, it’s so hard to not blame myself for people treating me differently or poorly. I needed this

[@existence75-xm7co]

Same, I live in a perpetual loop of self blame

[@Ssass98223]

I also used to be like this before 😢 But now I have created strong boundaries with selfish people you should do the same ❤

[@jenniferfields10]

I am a 51 year old INFJ empath and I was raised by a narcissistic mother who always told me I was ridiculous, crazy, unstable and full of nonsense. I've never been able to just be myself around others and I've never had a true friend that I could say anything to. In fact, my mouth/my words have always been misconstrued and gotten me in trouble. I blamed it on the gaslighting - that I was taught the wrong way to communicate. It's taken me until quite recently to realize that the abuse isn't the culprit. It's my INFJ-ness + being an empath. People are threatened by my sharp & accurate perceptions and they lash out. That's one HUGE question answered, but now, how do I tone down what is essentially...me? Currently, my mouth can start wars and get my ass kicked for being...well, accurate!

[@brandiek82]

Oh man, I know what you mean about getting hit with it for being accurate! I did this just the other day in fact. (PMS brain betrayed me.) I don't always succeed obviously, but I've found it helps to think the thing through thoroughly first, (even if it means staying silent in the moment and bringing it up again later), and find a way to help the person see the thing for themselves. Some way to come at it from around the back door instead of the front. At the same time constantly reassuring that I'm not judging or invalidating their thoughts or feelings, cuz that seems to be the misunderstanding I get. I'm just seeing something they might not have seen yet and I'm offering it for their consideration. If we're dealing with a rational person in a rational moment this often works wonders. If not, then ya... nothing gonna save you then. 😅

[@marlamayfield117]

@@brandiek82 I love that you said "think the thing through thoroughly first, (even if it means staying silent in the moment and bringing it up again later)". This is EXACTLY what I need to do! But it is so hard. LOL

[@brandiek82]

@@marlamayfield117 SO hard! 🤦😂

[@aliensarekind7936]

I'm in tears, thank you for this video. I needed it.

[@INFJcircle]

You are so welcome

[@AliciaGuitar]

I am 43 and if i could tell my younger self just one thing, it would be that my life will get a million times better after i study up on narcissistic personality red flags, and accept myself as i really am, disabilities, asexuality, and all. My life looks horrible from other's perspectives, but i am actually pretty happy and fulfilled now. My only real concern is for my grown children to also be happy.

[@lorettascott5477]

I totally agree 💯 I too just learned about narcissist behaviors and it floored me and opened up a whole new world. I want the same thing for my children and the world. Those people should not be walking amongst us. I have been through literal hell and even survived the worst of many suicide attempts to understand my purpose and more. This just gave me even more hope and understanding I feel so blessed. ❤🙏😊

[@snipergaming2639]

@@lorettascott5477stay strong bro!

[@marksmith164]

Dude, you have no idea how much this video has helped me today. I've been going through a rough patch the past week - feeling unappreciated for example. And since the 1 person who had really understood me died 6 months ago from breast cancer, I've been feeling incredibly frustrated and depressed about everything, especially at being misunderstood! I tell ya, I really needed to hear this, so thank you!

[@INFJcircle]

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss Mark. Especially of someone that rare, someone who understands. I'm so glad the video helped you. Feeling unappreciated is hard, I've had that many times. Stay strong and hopefully I will talk to you more in the future my friend. Jay

[@marksmith164]

​@The INFJ Circle Thank you. This was the first video I saw on your channel and when it finished I subbed straight away!

[@margaritakleinman5701]

@@marksmith164 I think I'm going to sub too, and I'm an ENFP! But so much of this is really relatable to me!

[@Daemonenkoenigin13]

My condolescenses, Mark. I hope you will find people who will eventually understand you again.

[@INFJcircle]

@@marksmith164 Thank you brother :)

[@annaleabrown4588]

Made me tear up. Thank you. I swear the "You have a right to..." parts need put on a poster I can print out and look at every day. On another note, you said "clingy and needy"... literally the words I got broken up with earlier this year... sigh. *Edited to add a funny.... May we all have a moment of silence for Canadian INFJs.... Can you imagine being Canadian with all the nice "I'm sorry" AND an INFJ with all the "I'm sorry"???

[@INFJcircle]

You are welcome Anna, I'm glad you liked it. I think most of us INFJ's have heard that "clingy, needy" bit from others, but it helps to know we aren't alone :) Yes, the Canadian INFJ's! I'm already spouting out so many "I'm sorry's..." I do feel for the Canadians! lol. Thanks for the comment. Jay

[@intuativefiha5771]

Sigma traits can successfully fill the gaps we have as an INFj.

[@MaryDunford]

​@The INFJ Circle Canadian INFJ. Used to apologize for everything. I learned, and stopped. Lol

[@margaritakleinman5701]

Do Canadians say "I'm sorry" a lot? I was familiar with the "eh" and the "out", but didn't know about the "I'm sorry" thing!

[@annaleabrown4588]

@@margaritakleinman5701 It's a running joke. Yes, they do seem to say I'm Sorry a lot. They are such polite people, generally.

[@misspomerol]

The biggest problem I run into is exhaustion because of all the intensity all the time and because I feel so intensely the feelings of other peoples sometimes it’s just overwhelming and you have to learn that it is OK that you need to just completely shut down. Sometimes you have to just completely unplug and give yourself a 100% break from the world or you’re going to self-destruct. That’s the most important lesson as an INFJ that I have learned. If I don’t do that things can get ugly because it’s very very easy for me to get overwhelmed like I have the weight of the entire world on my shoulders.

[@Andy-fr1hu]

I too get exhausted. Sometimes when I can’t sleep due to fleeting thoughts, I have to get up and remove myself from my room and find a distraction before feeling at ease enough to go back to sleep 💤.

[@lunabella8944]

As an INFJ, I need this! I felt that I was weird sometimes that too hard for me to keep friendships also I am very picky with people because I felt most of the people didn't understand me.... I like to engage with people who can have deep meaningful conversations, and a thinker.

[@jodiewalker3705]

I regret giving so much of myself to the wrong people. I wish I had known all of this many years ago. Starting now to have boundaries and trust my intuition. I really am not crazy. Feels good.

[@INFJcircle]

I agree Jodie. It would have saved me so much time and energy. But, better to know now that never. Glad you have more peace now and thank you for the comment! Jay

[@light-yf1vs]

The only solution for INFJ problem is to work on self awareness.

[@AlienVisitor777]

The amount of liberation that I've felt by being MYSELF and FEELING ok about it. This is the best time of my life.

[@LindaChapman-u2c]

I DO believe we are needed in the world, regardless how much they all seem to fear us. TY, friend!🥰🙏❤️‍🔥

[@cjh36]

They choose fear over love. We are not needed. They want damnation. It would be prideful to think we know better for them.

[@LindaChapman-u2c]

@@cjh36 We can't help those, but we are the balance & buffer to negative influence spread to others by being there in the mix often.

[@jokjones1]

This is the best assurance and validation I have ever seen. Thank you 😊

[@INFJcircle]

I am so glad this helped you Johanna. You're very welcome. You aren't alone, this came from my heart for sure :) Jay

[@kathyborthwick6738LakotaEmoji]

I am a Clinical Therspist and Social Worker - worked with Aboriginal and Criminal Justice Systems for over 40+ years and still take on the odd contract-nothing with the exception of raising my 5 sons has been more fulfilling than watching my clients/patients conquer their demons and start really living! Love 💕 this channel! 👵🏽✌🏾🦅💚🦅🙏🏾

[@ericanorton71]

Thanks for posting this. I've always wondered what was wrong with me? Then i realized something, it's not me, it's them! My expectations of others used to be as high for other people as they are for myself, but that gets me in trouble. I'm okay. I'm a deeply caring, deeply thinking person. It's okay!

[@9MileRoar]

Hi there I am from the UK, just got back from a 16 mile muddy trip in the woods on my e-bike. Hardly any soul around, as an INFJ it is my peace being out in nature and I came back home to find this amazing video, it was the icing ontop of a great day

[@INFJcircle]

E-bike and peaceful nature sounds like a great way to get out and recharge. I'm so glad the video helped you, that means a lot to me. :) Thanks for the comment! Jay

[@intuativefiha5771]

Sometimes i think leaving everything and everyone behind , not to remind a single soul that I m on a beach just for myself alone.

[@INFJcircle]

@@intuativefiha5771 Yeah, I feel that way sometimes too.I am alone much of the time, but get out a few times a week to keep as healthy mentally as possible.

[@Ananayat]

Imagine if us INFJ come together as a community, we would be like a X Men gang with supernatural rational powers of understanding ❤ I can’t imagine meeting people like me who understand the world with a perspective of living life in grey parameter, and not being angry with extreme polarity of right & wrong. We can definitely make world a much better place ❤

[@shankar3651]

Its not about feeling guilty or things being out of my control, or even about perfectionism, its about being so terribly, terribly alone. I am used to being alone, but loneliness and a sense of being misunderstood constantly gnaws at my soul. Everyone admires you and wants to be with you, but no one can ever keep up with you. The effort involved in trying to act "normal" with them is insane. There is no one to speak to, no one to trust, no one to love and no one to reveal your true self to, because they simply do not understand. It is a great strength which our surroundings do not accomodate. While I appreciate online communities, it does not help with wanting someone next to you. To have a living, breathing human being next to me who shows a glimmer of recognition for this agony would cure so many ails... but that is hoping for too much. We stand out, but seemingly always to our detriment and it always gets us into trouble. I am just so incredibly tired of it all and incapable of dealing with it. At times I feel like I am dying of heartbreak or like my soul is withering. What is even left for me in this world, what do I even have to look forward to, when I will still be forced to live in self-imposed exile from the rest of the world? I cannot go on living like this, but what choice do I have?

[@INFJcircle]

All great points Shankar. We try with our online communities and I do think it helps, but we all crave real human interaction and understanding. It seems most people can bond over the weather or sports, but we need more. I hope you are alright, I know things can get really bad - hope you aren't heading down a path of hurting yourself. Stay strong and don't give up hope. Clay Arnall just put up a video about how INFJs are misunderstood, he has a good grasp on the MBTI thing as an INFJ. Thanks so much for this comment and make sure to stay with us here in the circle. I plan to do as much as I can with this community, although it is virtual. Jay

[@Heykay34]

I feel every word. We are capable of being everything to anyone but can’t exactly find someone that won’t look at us funny when we actually reveal how we think. That chameleon thing is exhausting and come to think of it quite fake which i don’t like thinking of Myself that way but it is what it is. I will work on that by just saying exactly what i think in layman’s terms so they understand or just keeping quiet when I don’t have anything to say or add. Hopefully this helps in finding people that will actually get me to a certain extent…. I also feel like life is kinda been there done that. As we get older it’s even harder to form human connection because people cling so hard to their beliefs by a certain age, and when someone challenges those beliefs they shy away or get angry. While myself I’m quite flexible with things that challenge how I view the world. I just focus on being authentic and hope my tribe finds me through just being myself in daily life and interactions. Jump out of your thoughts and take all interactions at face value helps too, then you are constantly worrying if what you are saying will upset or offend the world other person, their emotions are not your problem especially since we are never intentionally rude. This has helped me a lot. Take the mask off and know you can only control your emotions and not others reactions to you.

[@ComplicatedSimplicite]

WOW sir! You TRULY understand the INFJ type! So impressed! Beautiful message! One that I personally needed reminded on. Thank you 🙏 ❤

[@INFJcircle]

Thank you for watching. I'm glad it was helpful - it helped me just making it. We need that reminder sometimes! Jay

[@darlinetinsel8113]

This just mAde me cry. This man explained all that I am that everyone around will never understand.

[@barbaravieira2239]

Thank You. 💜 💟 🥰 I am an INFJ with PTSD. Socializing is exhausting.

[@INFJcircle]

I agree. I wish you the best in dealing with PTSD. Jay

[@Andy-fr1hu]

I understand and agree with you. It is a very confusing combination of emotions at the same time. I wish you all the best. Time will help with patience and understanding with yourself. It feels like a push me-pull you at times. Your PTSD makes you withdrawal, but your INFJ says the opposite.

[@barbaravieira2239]

@@INFJcircle Thank You, Jay.

[@sparca_9866]

I'm crying hearing all the words. Because i realize how lonely i am towards the others. Towards the world. I often feel like an outsider even when i'm with my close friends. It's so hard to have a deep connection with other people, especially when i'm on the mood of being heard by others and ends up burn out from the stress cuz can't lets out the stress or something i've been thinking either because they can't understand, or they can't listen my deep thought for too long

[@Intheyr2525]

100% same!

[@krystlecalderwood3571]

Oh wow, this video knocked down my walls a little bit and almost got me to cry. I needed to hear ALL of that.

[@INFJcircle]

Krystle, it was definitely from the heart, living as an INFJ can be tough. Thanks so much for the comment! Jay

[@BigSky000]

It's been a rough week for this INFJ. You have the kindest, most soothing voice. Thank you.

[@INFJcircle]

I understand, been a tough one for me too. Just remember your value and stay strong!

[@BigSky000]

@@INFJcircle 🌞

[@MS-qc3rh]

Needed this. Thank you. Still blows my mind that I’m not the only one who perceives and processes like I do.

[@INFJcircle]

I thought I was alone for a long time too. But we aren’t, there are lots of us out there (even if we don’t see them very often lol). Jay Jay

[@MaryDunford]

This video is so empowering, uplifting, and true. It's funny how we're told we have to 'be in control', but end up feeling out of control because that kind of control doesn't exist. "You are not responsible for..." ~ So simple; but so empowering. We all need a reminder sometimes. God bless you! 😊🙏

[@INFJcircle]

Awesome. So glad you liked it. Yes, we INFJs seem to take responsibility for everything don't we? lol. Thanks for your comments Mary. Jay

[@mountaingirl2222]

Beautiful, accurate, and healing, thank you for this video. I have known I was an INFJ since I was a teenager. Now, three decades later, I have been diagnosed as being on the Autism Spectrum. I was dismissed my entire life regarding who I am and was diagnosed with mental health issues that are either outright wrong, or are an intrinsic part of my personality and autism (such as intense anxiety and social anxiety). The only one I cannot relate to in your video is the eye contact. I have a very hard time with eye contact and constantly have to force myself to do it because it feels invasive to me. The emotion that I feel when I look into the eyes of another fellow human being can be overwhelming to me because I am a highly sensitive empath and at the same time it physically pains me as I feel too vulnerable while doing it. The love I feel for all of God's creatures and plants is vast. I desire eye contact with pets and other animals given that I don't feel wary of them as I have come to feel about some humans because I have been deceived by several in my past. Thank you for your content. I am now a new subscriber.

[@INFJcircle]

Thank you for this great comment. Yes, the eye contact one seems to be different for every INFJ. Thank you for sharing your autism as well, I think there are similarities with INFJs and people on the spectrum, and many are indeed on the spectrum. I'm glad you enjoyed the video and I'm happy to have you a new subscriber! Jay

[@zaram131]

Same here!! I love animals so much. They are regulating and healing for me. I have distanced myself from people and surrounded myself with animals. I know it’s wrong, but people have hurt me and I don’t like them any more.

[@wolfe6220]

OMG, finally, someone who has the same eye contact issues! 💜

[@gmrobin6304]

I thought I was alone. An alien. A freak. Who can't talk like a normal person. But I now feel good for having INJF-T's like me. I am not alone.

[@jackleonemax]

I always feel responsible when something happens. I know I'm not, but the way I feel... well, it's like I can't help someone when I could. But you're right. We aren't responsible of the way others feel and think. Thank you! I'll watch this video many times. Sometimes, even with other INFJs, we have different opinions about what's the best way to do something.

[@carriem9471]

Feeling old and wise, but also young and naive at the same time. That struck a chord, thank you for this video.

[@cecilycook5592]

This is something ive taken to learning and understanding in my 30s. Now 34 and im very confident within myself because of this. Almost untouchable, emotionally because of this. We can NOT expect ourselves out of others. And quit putting their problems unto ourselves. Its been hard and took years to truly understand and practice.... but it is so freeing when you do accomplish this.

[@zev9561]

It's almost uncanny how every single thing hits home. Even so I know all these things deep down, it made me tear up watching this. It's nice to hear all this. Thank you.

[@INFJcircle]

You are welcome Zev, yes, these things seem to be known quite naturally to all of us INFJs. Thanks for watching and for your comment! Jay

[@lazekozuya]

glad to find this channel 😭

[@INFJcircle]

Welcome! Jay

[@lazekozuya]

@@INFJcircle thank you 😌

[@pagie2467]

Lord. I didn't think this would get me in my feelings. This hits home. 😭

[@NightCloudI]

"Have you often felt like an outsider looking in on the rest of society?" "You often felt lonely and misunderstood" "It's okay to feel old and wise and yet young and naive at the same time" This spoke to me on a spiritual level. ❤

[@cathyhallenlapsley3054]

I feel that all the time especially when I am around certain other adults.

[@martinamcwilliams3324]

Oh my goodness! This is soul validating. Thank you for this articulation. This summarizes my INFJ experience. I find it very difficult to formulate words to communicate to others on how I engage and see the world.

[@INFJcircle]

You are very welcome Martina! Yes, it can be so difficult to communicate to others sometimes as an INFJ. It seems they simply can't comprehend where we are coming from. Thanks for the great comment and hope to talk with you more in the future! Jay

[@abbynormal6966]

I think as INFJ's we all have this playing in our heads all the time, but it is nice to hear it in someone else's voice too. Thank you, I did need this today.

[@dragoshosha]

Bravo! the text of this creation is so emotional and so poetic, romantic, full of care and love, and quite objectively realistically beautiful, that it can qualify for a literary prize, such as the Pulitcera Prize, and maybe even the Nobel Prize in Literature.

[@Andy-fr1hu]

I awoke from one of my night terrors and saw your video 😊. It was exactly what I needed to calm myself. Thank you ❤

[@justinekingmaker493]

"It's ok that you sometimes cut toxic or negative people out of your life." I really wish someone had given me this permission so much earlier in my life. It would have saved me years of damage. Took me until my 50's to realize cutting ties with my toxic family was OK and Healthy! So many years of toxicity and abuse by my horrible family caused me years of PTSD. Having No Contact with them now saves me from constantly questioning my own sanity! I've gotten better about this, I'm finally at peace with myself and my life choices. I know now, that I must look out for ME before even thinking about others. Kinda like how they tell you in airplanes to secure your own facemask before helping someone else.

[@monicalima7285]

Thanks for sharing, I just found out I am INFJ , I just divorced a narcissistic husband and now I understand why i married him and didn’t notice all the abuses , now I am free and knowing myself

[@INFJcircle]

It is a great feeling to finally know you are an INFJ. It explains to much. Here's to you learning more and more about yourself! :) Jay

[@june-uni]

Same here xxx

[@goontubeassos7076]

As an INFJ male, I’m a groundskeeper for a 10 acre estate, I hate talking about the weather but I have to know the weather. My personal hell!!!

[@noway905]

Sometimes it's bad enough being an INFJ, but pile on top of that being a Pisces.

[@amadeobagacay2202]

i badly need these kind of appreciation. i felt appreciated and honored 🥰

[@邪眼の男]

This is Wholesome and Captivating! I honestly cried a lot while watching and felt deeply lost in the moment. Its strange but I feel that the world or people sometimes doesn’t wants us to be around. This thing happened to me currently when I'm trying on helping a woman who is being manipulated by her boyfriend. I tried giving her support and advices of the manipulation she doesn't see. In the end she blocked me out forever but I can't really blame her on what she want for her life. Its just sad that even we try to make things better or bring justice in this world. We always ends up being the enemy of others or letting go everything for fate to take its own course. In a world full of darkness and chaos, We can still bring light and order out there just by being ourselves.

[@Andy-fr1hu]

This situation (blocking you) was not about you. It was about this person knowing the truth, but not willing to change their situation. You may hear from them again one day after they learn their in a toxic situation and have left. Maybe then an apology will come 😊

[@LisetteOlds]

Thankyou. I don't know why people like to misunderstand me and project their intentions onto me but Iv finally hit the age where I know it says more about them than it does me. Bless everyone.

[@INFJcircle]

You are welcome. It certainly does say more about them than you. Stay strong! Jay

[@SibyllaCumana]

Well, life is damn difficult for INFJs. I have always put other people's wellbeing before mine, being misunderstood and often trampled on despite my good intentions. I'm a bit more cynical now, but this urge of helping everybody except myself really makes me wish I was born with a different personality

[@INFJcircle]

It’s one of the toughest things about being an INFJ. but if your intentions are pure, at least you can always can go to bed knowing you are trying to do the right thing. Thank you for the great comment. Jay

[@alostlegend1126]

Thank you so much for this. I really needed it.

[@jeskawes]

I've rarely felt more *seen* 💓 Thank you SO MUCH for the validation I feel from this video 🙏

[@INFJcircle]

You are very welcome Jessica. You are not alone :) Thanks for letting me know, means a lot to me! Jay

[@tamaratravis6651]

I recently ran into these INFJ videos. I am 65 years old and it explains everything about my life . I certainly didn’t know that there was a classification about my personality. I had always wondered what it was about me. That got the reactions from people that I do. What I would like to say, is that no matter what, always stay true to yourself. Who else am I supposed to be? to be anything other than yourself could only possibly cause serious mental illness. I don’t have to tell you to stay away from the toxic people that come to you, once you have found them to be toxic. I wish you all good luck and stay strong.

[@conniegagne6325]

Listening to this makes me tear up, it really strikes home with how I feel! It is amazing learning that there are others like me❤

[@mauntwt2509]

my heart almost sinked when I heard “you are not responsible for other peoples feelings”

[@aliasgirl9]

As soon as I learned AND accepted that I was infj - after healing from some trauma (that came from feeling like I was broken all my life) - I felt an overwhelming sense of peace about being me. Also, just today I had something happen where I needed to process something very quickly using my introverted intuition yet at the same time I craved being able to bounce off ideas in a collaborative manner. I am a walking contradiction.

[@aishwarya2016]

I felt that when you said "I am a walking contradiction ." ;( Have a great day ✨

[@INFJcircle]

Yep, I think that is one of the issues with us INFJs, we seem to be craving two different things a lot of times. Strange, but definitely unique. Hopefully, we can stay positive and keep trying to learn how to use this unique gift! Thanks for your insightful comment. Jay

[@okszat]

I hardly ever feel so understood... It was very helpful for me. Thank you.

[@hayleysmith5477]

Most moments of my life is like a rough day. I am always misunderstood, scolded for my actions, judged by my decisions, unappreciated, and a bit lonely. I felt so useless. I feel like I'm a burden. I always feel guilty because I thought I was the problem. I am a quiet person and it's hard being silent all the time because you can't defend yourself from others' assumptions about you. I always thought, why am I different? Why can't I be like my sibling who has a lot of friends anywhere, receives a lot of greetings, and gets invited to parties,? But now that I've come across this video, thank you. I realized that this is my life and I don't have to change just because I was different from the rest. I am an INFJ and it's okay to be an INFJ.

[@INFJcircle]

Thank you for the comment Hayley. I understand where you are coming from. I'm so glad the video helped you see that you are an INFJ. I will tell you that while it helps immensely to know, it will still be hard living life as an INFJ. Just remember, when you feel down and lonely and like a misfit, come back and watch this video (or other INFJ stuff) and realize you are not alone and you are very special and valuable. Thanks so much for watching and for the great comment! Jay

[@spectate0074]

you are not responsible for others being rude to you. you just saved younger me. thank you.

[@kethcup]

Alone time is the best the best time.

[@gravethebeyond]

As a INFJ, life can be so lonely when people just don't understand you. I help and I help. Yet I feel like my needs are not being filled.

[@elhanafiaya5]

I really needed to hear those words, I appreciate how you made me feel. Thank you ❤

[@robs2038]

Hey I get it. Not depressed or anxious. I am from a more caring generation. Thank God.

[@madamerosared]

Is it ok to tear up while listening to this? These statements are very well put together; I feel so heard.

[@INFJcircle]

Sure is :) Jay

[@ARsuffix]

Wow. 😮 Just about every single one of these affirmations, it's like they were addressed specifically to me. This was powerful, thank you!

[@INFJcircle]

Wonderful Antonio! I'm glad it helped you. Thanks for the comment :) Jay

[@LindaChapman-u2c]

TY for being my friend by making this video. It doesn't matter that my comments are invisible to you. The original helpful intent still produces benefit while you stay isolated & protected. Best wishes in all you do.❤️‍🔥🙏🥰

[@INFJcircle]

Glad I could help!

[@A_z_e_o_n]

The list I didn't know I needed to hear, all in one video. A lot of them I had to learn the hard way-other ones I am still trying to practice. It's definitely a challenge, especially when the people around you suddenly think you're stand-offish or mean now because you start honoring yourself. It really shows who will be with you for the long haul, who love you and choose to stay for all the versions of you. This video reminded me of the things I have faced, and have become stronger-and made me think of all the ways I have grown and what I can improve on. Thank you!

[@MoonlightMystic4444]

I cried through this entire video. I have never felt so seen, understood and accepted. Thank you so very much.

[@silflay_h8134]

Thank you so much for this video! It’s sincerely like someone looked into my soul and talked about what they saw there!! Feeling so uplifted and peaceful after watching this ❤️❤️❤️

[@INFJcircle]

Awesome silflay, I'm glad this helped you! Thanks for letting me know, means a lot to me :) Jay

[@LoriBurchfiel]

Wow, I couldn't stop crying. Thank you

[@shimaruchan]

After the first minute of this video I had tears in my eyes until the end of it. It's been about 3 years I took the mbti test and ever since I felt that maybe i am not an infj. And the only reason for this was that being an infj is so rare. I just couldn't believe it and i don't even know why. But after watching this video I realized I am seriously an infj. All of it made sense to me because they were all things that i do ALL THE TIME. And it made me felt at ease. And the funny thing is, I knew it all. I knew people are not my responsibility but i felt like they were anyway. I want to thank you so much for making this video.

[@INFJcircle]

You are so welcome Anne! Well, they say one of the ways you know you are an INFJ is if you keep doubting the results of your personality test! lol. Sounds like you are a true INFJ. I'm glad you enjoyed the video and that it helped you! Jay

[@kalinadesseaux8011]

THANK YOU. needed this. SPEAK TRUTH OVER US. I watched 3 ties crying desperate for truth. I will be sharing this and returning to it.

[@joshuamckillop5806]

This video helped my emotional state so much. I always from my earliest memories felt misunderstood this entire video spoke to me so clearly and I’m actually downloading it to listen to when I get overwhelmed cuz being such an sensitive infj I need pick me ups.. Thank you for validating how we all experience life as it’s very different

[@joshuamckillop5806]

And it’s nice to know we are heard at least from one another

[@SynchroDiaries]

“It’s okay to feel old and wise and yet young and naive at the same time.” Wow. This is a truth I’d never heard put into words before. Thank you for seeing me.

[@jikook7457]

Everything u said that INFJs are not wrong about had me teary-eyed. I've always felt/been made to feel like the weirdo, the strange one because I like things they don't or that I'm overreacting when someone is a snarky a-hole to me. I now know I'm not the only one, and that's y reddit has AITA posts 😊 I wish I had known and understood y I'm like I am in my teens. It could've really been soul soothing for me over my lifetime, but better late than never. ✌️

[@susanfox-mx3nv]

Thanks, Jay. The bit that moved me the most was the comment that most people just want to be validated in a group. I think I always saw this, but I didn't have the words. That's what you do, give words to what is only known intuitively. You are like Windex. You remove all the scum so the light can come through, and we can see what's happening outside. Cheers & Blessings.

[@direlavender1439]

My younger sibling sent this to me and told me I should watch it. I may or may not have teared up a bit watching this. Thank you

[@INFJcircle]

You are so welcome! I'm so glad the video helped you. It's just a compilation of things I've felt throughout my life that simply aren't true. We might be different, but there isn't anything "wrong" with us! Thanks for letting me know this helped you, means a lot to me. Jay