IELTS Writing Task 1: Line Graph (1) | Cambridge 18 - Sample Answer + Analysis

[@NabijonMashrapov]

Five months ago, task one essays were too complicated for me, but after I watched your videos. They will look like a piece of cake to write all types of essays from that moment on. you are the best, I appreciate you so much.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Thank you for your kind words! I'm thrilled to hear that my videos have helped you with task one essays. Keep up the great work, and feel free to reach out if you have any more questions in the future! 😊📝

[@NabijonMashrapov]

thanks😄@@ieltstimeZ

[@ieltstimeZ]

Feel free to type your answer for this line graph in the comment section, and I will do my best to provide feedback on a selection of responses. You are not alone!

[@emmanueldodoo1699]

IELTS ACADEMIC 18, TEST 1, WRITING TASK 1 [INTRODUCTION + OVERVIEW] *The line graph provides data about the percentage of population living in the cities of four Asian countries between 1970 and 2020, with projections for 2030 and 2040.* Overall, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia experienced a consistent upward rise in population whilst Philippines encountered a fluctuation. All four countries are projected to reach their peak by 2040. Comparatively, both Malaysia together with Indonesia witnessed a rapid surge whereas Philippines plus Thailand observed a gradual increase.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Nice!

[@Mahshid-x4d]

Hi, I managed to achieve a writing band score of 7, and I owe it to you because your channel has helped me significantly. Thank you so much!"

[@ieltstimeZ]

Hi! Congratulations on achieving a Band 7 in writing-that’s an amazing accomplishment! 🎉 Your hard work truly paid off, and I’m so glad my channel could help you on your journey. I wish you all the best for your future goals! ❤😊

[@MuhammadHasnainShams]

It is simple, to the point and wonderful. Thank You!

[@ieltstimeZ]

Glad you found it useful!

[@KabbuGamers]

The given graph illustrates the Urban population percentage in Philippines , Malaysia , Thailand and Indonesia between 1970 to 2020 with the forecast of 2030 and 2040. Overall, the growth of population seems to be significantly increasing in all the four Asian countries . While, there was little bit fluctuation seen in the Philippines. In the year 1970 the population of Malaysia was 30% and later on it peak up to around 80% in 2020. furthermore, the prediction of their living in the cities seems to be more than 80%. In the same here, Indonesia was the least population among all the four countries with the percentage around 12%. after a four decades it increased rapidly with the second highest population along the 4 Asian countries which is seems around 60% including the forecast of 2040. The population of the Philippines had a decrease rate in the year 2010 with the loss of a less than 10%. Beside that loss from the year 1990 it again started growing with is around same as the 1990 with 50% living in cities. In 1970 residential rate of peoples in cities of Thailand was less than 20% and rosed up to 30% in the next two decades and remain plateau till the 2020. The forecast of the Thailand is seems to be increased up to with more than 45% in 2040. How much band can i get?

[@ieltstimeZ]

Hi there! You've made a good attempt at describing the data and trends, but there are some areas that can be improved to achieve a higher band score. You’ve identified key trends in the data, such as the steady increase in Malaysia’s urban population and the forecasted growth in Thailand and Indonesia. You’ve also made an effort to mention predictions for 2030 and 2040, which is important for fully addressing the task. Task Achievement: o Be careful with accuracy when describing the data. For example, the Philippines’ urban population did not “decrease” in 2010 but experienced fluctuations. o Avoid generalizations like “all the countries show significant growth” because Thailand remained steady for a long time. o Include key comparisons, such as mentioning that Malaysia consistently had the highest percentage of urban population. Coherence and Cohesion: o Use a variety of cohesive devices (e.g., "in contrast," "however," "similarly") to make your writing smoother. o Avoid overusing informal phrases like "little bit fluctuation" and "beside that loss." Lexical Resource: o Use formal vocabulary to describe changes in the data. For example:  “Peaked at” instead of “it peak up.”  “Remained stable” instead of “remain plateau.” o Avoid repetition of words like "seems" and "furthermore." Try alternatives like “appears” or “additionally.” Grammatical Range and Accuracy: o Be careful with subject-verb agreement and article use. For example:  Correct: “The population peaked at around 80%.”  Incorrect: “It peak up to around 80%.” o Use more complex sentences to describe trends, such as:  “While Malaysia experienced a steady increase, Thailand’s urban population remained stable for two decades.” o Check punctuation and capitalization, as errors in these areas can reduce clarity. Suggestions for Improvement: • Practice using a wider range of vocabulary for describing graphs and trends (e.g., "declined," "rose steadily," "remained constant"). • Pay close attention to grammar when writing. Revise your sentences to ensure they are accurate and formal. Your score falls between 5.0 to 5.5, with the main areas for improvement being grammar and word usage. With generous scoring, it might even receive a 6.0, but consistent errors make this challenging. Keep up the good work! With more practice, you’ll see significant improvement.

[@malikbabar9997]

One of the best I ever found.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Glad you found it useful!

[@nayoungkim5803]

The given graph illustrates the proportion of urban population in four asian countries over 50 years, with the projections for 2030 and 2040. Overall, upward trend can be seen among all four countries from 1970 to 2020, with the projection of a rise for 2030 and 2040. In detail, Malaysia and Indonesia has exprienced a dramatic increase in urban population. In 2020, the figure increased from 15% and 30% to around 75% and 50% respectively. Urban residents in Malaysia will be peak at 82% in 2040, representing the highest level among four counties. People living in Indonesia will be four times as much as, compared to the figure of 1970. There were steep increase between 1980 and 1990 in the Philippines and Thailand. Although there was slight decrease from 1990 to 2020 in the Philippines, both countries will be experiencing a increase in urban residents, peaking at around 53% and 45% in 2040, respectively.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Well done! Keep up the good work. Here are a few points to consider: Proofreading: It’s crucial to set aside time for proofreading. This will help you catch minor errors like spelling "exprienced" instead of "experienced," "a increase" instead of "an increase," and "Malaysia and Indonesia has" instead of "Malaysia and Indonesia have." Additionally, the sentence "Urban residents in Malaysia will be peak at 82%" should be corrected to "Urban residents in Malaysia are expected to peak at 82%." Data Accuracy: Double-check the data you include to ensure it matches the graph. For instance, you mentioned an increase "from 15% and 30% to around 75% and 50%," but these figures are inaccurate based on the graph. Linking Words: Incorporating more linking words, such as "In contrast" or "Moreover," can improve the flow between your paragraphs and sentences.

[@emmanueldodoo1699]

I scored band 7 with your videos. Kudos to you sir.

[@ieltstimeZ]

That's fantastic news! Congratulations on achieving a Band 7 score! Your hard work has definitely paid off.

[@emmanueldodoo1699]

Sure

[@annmurugi3348]

I tried it on my own it was quite challenging, but you have really simplified it ,I truly appreciate, do you do private lessons

[@ieltstimeZ]

Thank you for your kind comment! I'm glad to hear that the video was helpful and that it simplified the writing process for you. About private lessons, I'm afraid my schedule is so tight for now, but if you have any specific questions or need further clarification on any writing topics, feel free to ask in the comments. Keep up the great work and stay tuned for more helpful content!

[@FariaNawrin]

The given chart illustrate the proportion of urban residents in four Asian countries including Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia over 50 year period, along with the prejections for 2030 to 2040. Overall it is evident that the number of the population went up significantly between two countries Malaysia and Indonesia between 1970 and 2020. Similarly, the two cities Thailand and Phillippines population growth rose steadily from 1970 to 2020. The climbing numbers are particularly seen in four cities between 2030 and 2040. In 1970, between Malaysia and Indonesia, the percentage were about 13% and 30% respectively. These rose to reach the peak almost 80% and 50% in 2020.Moreover , the estimates of growing individuals are increased with 55% and 80%. Meanwhile, the figures of population growth in Thailand and Phillippines climbed up about 12% to 20% and 30% to 45% from 1970 to 1990. The rates were flactuated and it grew steadily with 25% and 40% respectively. The future estimation for both cities grow rapidly along with 40% and 45%.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Well done! Keep up the good work. Here are a few points to consider: Proofreading: It’s important to set aside some time for proofreading. This will help you catch minor errors like misspelling 'illustrate' instead of 'illustrates' in line one, 'prejections' instead of 'projections,' or using 'cities' when you mean 'countries.' Tense usage: Be mindful of switching between past and future tenses. Data between 1970 and 2020 should be discussed in the past tense, while projections should be in the future tense. For example, instead of saying "are increased," it should be "are projected to increase." Linking words: There’s a need for more effective use of linking words between sentences. Phrases like "In contrast" or "Meanwhile" would help connect ideas more logically. You should also compare trends between the countries more clearly. For instance, emphasize how Indonesia's growth was slower than Malaysia’s or how the Philippines experienced fluctuations while Indonesia had a steady rise. Data clarity: When discussing future projections, make sure it’s clear which figure corresponds to which country. For example, the correct forecast for 2040 is around 60% for Indonesia and 82% for Malaysia.

[@FariaNawrin]

@@ieltstimeZ thank u. Please give me a score. Because, I think it helps me to improve.

[@ieltstimeZ]

@@FariaNawrin I’m not a certified examiner, but based on my experience, your score likely falls between 5.5 and 6.5. Keep practicing, and you’ll see improvement!

[@FariaNawrin]

@@ieltstimeZ thanks...

[@paulahuckleberry6678]

hey I cannot find your solution for the writing test 4 book 18 (prices on metals) can you share again? TY

[@ieltstimeZ]

Yeah, sorry, I deleted the video a few days ago because I want to rewrite and post it again soon.

[@paulahuckleberry6678]

great I'm a active follower of your channel my test is due in April 28@@ieltstimeZ

[@ieltstimeZ]

@@paulahuckleberry6678 Thank you for your support! I'm glad to hear you're finding value in the content. I'm confident you'll do fantastic on your test! Keep pushing forward!

[@kieunguyen3860]

It is well explained lesson, so it is easy to understand. Thank you for your dedication to help us. In the overall section, is that ok if we do not put comparision the data in general?

[@ieltstimeZ]

I'm glad you found it useful. About your question, an overview is important as it shows your overall understanding of the trends, changes, or main features of the graphs. As long as you mention the main points without including specific details (like numbers), you're on the right track. However, it’s usually important to highlight the differences to clearly show the overall trend/s.

[@kieunguyen3860]

@@ieltstimeZ thank you very much!

[@madushankaekanayaka8340]

Nicely illustrated. Thank you!

[@ieltstimeZ]

Glad you found it useful.

[@Maria-nz3mz]

Please make video on type of sentences with examples like SIMPLE/COMPLEX AND COMPUND

[@ieltstimeZ]

Sure, will do!

[@emmanueldodoo1699]

My Intro: The line graph illustrates the percentage of population living in the cities of four different Asian countries between 1970 and 2020 with projections for 2030 and 2040.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Well done! the paraphrase captures the main idea of the statement.

[@anonymoushunter6308]

Too simply defined ❤❤

[@ieltstimeZ]

Glad you found it useful!

[@muzammiljavedshaikh2903]

Loved it! But I am uncertain if this is band 9 content; the vocabulary seems to be too simple. What do you think?

[@ieltstimeZ]

I'm glad to hear that you enjoyed the sample and found it helpful. While I cannot provide a score as I am not a certified examiner, I believe that the vocabulary used effectively conveyed the information. However, it's important to note that achieving a high score in IELTS writing involves more than just using advanced vocabulary. The accuracy and coherence of your description, as well as the overall quality of your writing, are also essential. To achieve a high band score, you should focus on demonstrating a clear understanding of the task, organizing your ideas effectively, presenting them coherently, and using accurate grammar. Keep up the good work, and feel free to ask for further assistance if needed. Best of luck with your IELTS preparation!

[@wheezy_lilhot3106]

@@ieltstimeZ But I personally think it might be better if you add some comparisons.

[@ieltstimeZ]

@@wheezy_lilhot3106 Thank you for your comment. You are absolutely right! Adding comparisons can indeed enhance this writing and provide more depth to the description. For example: From 1970 to 2020, Malaysia and Indonesia saw remarkable increases in their urban population percentages. Malaysia's urban population rose from 30% to 75%, showing a significant surge compared to Indonesia's growth, which increased from about 12% to 50%. Comparatively, Thailand's growth was ...

[@nileshdesilva]

Awsome. I really learned a lot.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Glad it was helpful!

[@___-hw6jy]

Hi sir love this content but I got a little bit confuse in “are forecast” I thought passive voice should be v.to be+v3” pls explain to me

[@ieltstimeZ]

Good question! 'Forecast' is one of those verbs where the base and participle forms are the same. Both 'are forecast' and 'are forecasted' are correct.

[@viveksai8326]

Very beautifully explained thank you

[@ieltstimeZ]

I'm glad you found it useful.

[@paulahuckleberry6678]

Hello, can just use instead if "it had since.." just write "it continued to ..."?

[@ieltstimeZ]

Yes, sure. It is a simpler version.

[@Ch-rv2cp]

Please give some advices, thx. Do I really need to include all countries into my writing task 1? The line chart illustrates the proportion of the individuals living in urbans in four Asian nations between 1970 and 2020, with expectations for 2030 and 2040. Overall, the percentage of Philippines fluctuated, while the remains increased steadily between 1970 and 2020. Moreover, the trends of every statistic are predicted to be upward from 2020 to 2040, with the proportion of Malaysia expected to attain its highest point in 2040. In 1970, the figure of Philippines was just over 30%, ranking first and reaching its peak of nearly 50% in 1990 and before showing a mild decline after two decades later. However, in next 20 years, it is anticipated to grow stably to almost the same level as in 1990, securing the third position. By 2020, the number of Malaysia rose significantly by more than 40% over a span of 50 years, surpassing others categories and predicted to experience slight growth of just above 80% until 2040. The statistic of Indonesia was the smallest in 1970, with approximately 15%, forecast to climb steadily to about 60% and eventually taking over the second rank.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Yes, you need to include them all, but you shouldn’t describe every single point; instead, you should group similarities and contrast differences. Your sample is good, but adding more details will improve it. I mean you should use phrases like ‘it will grow from ____ to _____ /it decreased by 20% over 20 years from ____ to ____. ‘ Grouping similarities, as you did in some cases, will help you avoid mentioning all years. For example, from 1990 to 2010, it reduced steadily to around 40% but is anticipated to grow to around X over the next two decades.

[@Ch-rv2cp]

Appreciation for your help, I will improve it.😄@@ieltstimeZ

[@SN24-r2p]

Where is the comparison?

[@ieltstimeZ]

I did include some sentences that explicitly show the comparisons, such as the following examples, but for sure, there is room for improvement: 1- From 1970 to 2020, Malaysia and Indonesia saw remarkable increases in their urban population percentages from 30% to 75% and about 12% to 50%, respectively. (Comparison between Malaysia and Indonesia) 2- Moreover, estimations indicate further growth for these countries, with numbers climbing to around 82% and 60% for Malaysia and Indonesia, respectively. (Comparison between Malaysia and Indonesia) 3- Meanwhile, The Philippines' urban population rose from about 31% to 48% between 1970 and 1990. Although there was a slight decrease to around 42% in 2010, it has since continued to grow and is anticipated to peak at about 55% in 2040. (Comparison between different years for The Philippines) 3- Similarly, Thailand went up in 2020 compared to 1970, with numbers rising to about 30% from 19%. The country's urban population is estimated to surge, with a rise to approximately 49% in 2040. (Comparison between different years for Thailand)

[@mehrnooshmusics]

Hello, Thank you for this helpful video! It is amazing!I wrote this writing for this test, and I'd appreciate it if you give me feedback in all areas (vocab,task achievement, grammar,..)and a predicted Band score, if you can? . Also, I wrote this writing in a shorter amount of time compared to the previous one! Here is my Wrting: "The graph shows the percentage of people who lived in cities from 1970 to 2020 and predictions for 2030 and 2040 in four countries in Asia. Overall, all four countries faced a general rise with its prediction that it will also rise in the future. While the Malaysia and Indonesia have had an all-time rise throughout the years, the two remaining countries had some deflections in their pattern. (8:09) Regarding the group with all-time increase, Malaysia’s percentage of population living in cities was 30%, and then in 1990 it faced a sharp rise until 2040, which will reach a peak with becoming more than 80%. Indonesia, however, started its sharp rise in 2000 (about 30%) and after that in 2040, it will be doubled. In 1970, Philippines had the highest percentage of city-people among all and in 20 years after that, it rose to about 50% but then the percentage fall down until 2010 and faced a gradual rise after that. Also, the pattern of Thais who live in cities were about 20% in 1970 but after a slight decline in 2000, it started to increase and it is predicted to be more than 40% in 2040. "

[@ieltstimeZ]

Hi there! It’s great to hear that you managed to complete this faster. You’ve done a good job! Here’s my feedback: Task Achievement: You generally cover the main trends and key data points well. However, in some cases, the details could be more specific. It’s important to refer back to the chart with exact numbers. For example, when mentioning Malaysia's urban population increase in 1990, you didn't specify that it rose from 30% to about 55%. Cohesion and Coherence: Your essay is well-organized, with a clear introduction and body paragraphs. To improve cohesion, try adding more variety to your vocabulary to avoid repetition. Also, some of your sentences are a bit long, which makes them harder to follow. Breaking them into shorter sentences and using smoother transitions would improve the flow. You’ve used linking words like "also," "while," and "however" correctly, but their placement can sometimes feel awkward. Shorter, clearer sentences will enhance the overall coherence. Vocabulary: You’ve used a good range of vocabulary, but there’s room for improvement by avoiding repetition. Try using verb-adverb combinations and prediction verbs like "project," "anticipate," and "forecast" for variation. Additionally, "city-people" can be replaced with "urban population" for better accuracy. Grammar: Some long sentences could cause confusion, so breaking them down will help. There are also a few errors with articles (e.g., "the Malaysia and Indonesia") and word choice (e.g., "deflections" should be "fluctuations" or "changes"). Additionally, some sentences, like "it faced a sharp rise until 2040," are unclear. There are minor tense issues too (e.g., "it will be doubled" should be "it will double"). I’m not a certified examiner, but I’d estimate your essay falls between 5.5 and 6.0. With some adjustments based on these points, you can push it to a 6+. Good luck with your preparation!

[@이현-e1c6i]

Hello when if i write like your sample, what band score i may get?

[@ieltstimeZ]

I'm not a certified examiner, so I can't give you a score. Instead, I suggest focusing on describing the data clearly, providing a concise overview, and using relevant vocabulary and grammar. Avoid worrying about the score and concentrate on improving the quality of your writing.

[@nguyenthaolinh3789]

Could you please to give me your feedback about the following answer. Thank you (that's too long, but I'm not sure where to cut): The line graph gives information about how the urban population changed in four countries in Asia over half a century (1970 - 2020) and predicted figures for two years: 2030 and 2040. Overall, while there was an upward trend in the percentage of people living in urban areas over the period given in all countries, growth speed between them was different and Malaysia experienced the fastest increase compared to other countries in the group. With the Philippines and Malaysia, in the beginning of the period, both had a similar urban population rate, at around 30%. Over the following years, while Malaysia recorded a steady increase, with total urban people rising to about 75% in 2020, the figures of the Philippines fluctuated and by 2020 had reached 45%, which was far lower than its counterpart. It is predicted that in the next two decades (2030 and 2040), the percentage of dwellers in both countries will rise, with Malaysia climbing to over 80%, and the Philippines reaching 60%. Thailand and Indonesia had lower figures than the above countries, at under 20%. However, Indonesia had a faster growth than Thailand, despite initially having the lower figures. From 1970 to 2020, the percentage of Indonesians living in cities increased significantly, from just 13% rising to around 50%, standing in the second position in the list. With Thailand, the figure rose gradually and in 2020 was about 30%, at the bottom of the list. It is estimated that in 2040, Indonesia and Thailand will see an increase in urban population rate, at 60% and over 45% respectively.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Well done! You have effectively highlighted the main trends and compared the percentages. However, there are a few minor suggestions for improvement: Your paraphrase is good enough, but your overview's second part needs revision. The graph does not explicitly provide data on 'growth rates' or specific numerical values for comparison, so using terms like "growth speed" and "fastest increase" may not be appropriate or accurate. Instead, it would be more accurate to describe the trends based on the percentages shown in the graph. For example, you could mention that Malaysia experienced the highest percentage of urban population throughout the period. Body paragraph one: 1- "total urban people rising to about 75%" - Instead of "total urban people," it would be more accurate to say "urban population" or "percentage of urban population" rising to about 75%. 2- "the figures of the Philippines fluctuated" - While it is true that the urban population percentage for the Philippines showed fluctuations, it would be better to specify the range of these fluctuations to provide a clearer picture. For example, you could say "the urban population percentage for the Philippines fluctuated between X% and Y% over the given years." 3- The number for the Philippines in 2040 is not 60%. Body paragraph two: 1- "despite initially having the lower figures" - To provide more clarity, specify that "the lower figures" refer to Indonesia's initial urban population percentage compared to Thailand. 2- Consider the same points about the 'speed' I mentioned above. 3- Instead of "at the bottom/top of the list," use 'the highest, the lowest, the second most, etc.'

[@nguyenthaolinh3789]

@@ieltstimeZ thank you so much for spending your valuable time to check and correct my essay. That means a lot to me.

[@ieltstimeZ]

​@@nguyenthaolinh3789 You're welcome. I'm glad you found it helpful😊.

[@ronjason]

thanks for giving feedback @@ieltstimeZ

[@chukwuemekaokenyi1024]

You are awesome🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@iris_1246]

awesome video

[@ieltstimeZ]

Glad you enjoyed it

[@PouyaRahimi-zg6jz]

Thanks a million ❤ Your passion for teaching and dedication to sharing valuable lessons for free are truly commendable.❤️❤️👏👏👏✅✅ Thank you for breaking down complex concepts into easily digestible content that caters to a wide range of learning styles. Your engaging teaching methods have made it easier and more enjoyable for me to improve my English skills. 😉😉😉🙏🙏🙏🆒🆒🆒 Keep up the fantastic work - I can't wait to see more of your videos!💪💪💪💪💪🙏🙏

[@ieltstimeZ]

Thank you for your amazing support and kind words! I'm glad you find my videos helpful. Stay tuned for more! 😊❤️🙏

[@kiranbala5756]

Sir pls provide Cambridge 18 test 4 task 1 sample answer i couldn't find it pls

[@ieltstimeZ]

Sorry for that. I've deleted the sample, but I'll make sure to write another one soon.

[@emmanueldodoo1699]

IELTS ACADEMIC 18, TEST 1, WRITING TASK 1 [INTRODUCTION + OVERVIEW + BODY 1 + BODY 2] *The line graph provides data about the percentage of population living in the cities of four Asian countries between 1970 and 2020, with projections for 2030 and 2040.* Overall, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia experienced a consistent upward rise in population whilst Philippines encountered a fluctuation. All four countries are projected to reach their peak by 2040. Comparatively, both Malaysia together with Indonesia witnessed a rapid surge whereas Philippines plus Thailand observed a gradual increase. Beginning from the year 1970 to 2020, both Malaysia and Indonesia saw considerable increase in percentage population from 30% to approximately 75% and about 12% to around 50% respectively. Furthermore, these nations have been estimated to experience gradual growth reaching their peaks at 80% and 60% accordingly by 2040. Meanwhile, the population in Philippines and Thailand increased slightly from a little above 30% to 50% and just under 20% to 30% individually for the first twenty years period. Afterwards, Philippines decreased slowly to almost 40% in 2010 and it has since continued to rise to approximately 45% in 2020. Nonetheless, Thailand has continuously witnessed an upward rise reaching 30% in 2020. These two countries are conjectured to encounter growth peaking at about 55% and 50% independently by 2024.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Well done! It is a good overview with specific points. You successfully covered the main points. Just be careful with articles (saw a considerable increase). ‘Independently’ and ‘accordingly’ are inappropriate words in this context; you could use ‘respectively’ or different structures to avoid this trap.

[@sebnemferah9089]

First of all, I want to say " thank you" for all those valuable content you provided in your channel. I will take my first ielts exam next sunday and ı prepare wih your videos. Could you review my essay if you have time ? Thank you in advance. The graph illustrates portion of the total population of Asian countries (Philippines, Malaysia,Thailand, Indonesia) that live in the urban areas for the time period starting from 1970 to 2020 in ten years of time intervals. Furthermore, estimations are made for 2030 and 2040. Overall, urban population in Philippines increased slightly from 1970 to 2020 whereas percentage of Thailand, Malaysia and Indonesia living in the cities rose substantially. Malaysia was the country facing the most dramatic increase. The estimations for 2030 and 2040 show that urban population is expected to increase further. In Philippines, from 1970 to 2010, urban population only slightly escalated from 30% of population to %45 of population whereas a rise of 10% of population is expected from 2020 to 2040. Thailand faced to higher increase of urban population compared to Philippines with 30% increase from 1970 to 2020. However, an increase of 15% is estimated from 2020 to 2040. A dramatic increase in urban population was seen from 1970 to 2020 with a consistent upward movement for Malaysia. In 1970, the percentage of city population was only 30% and it reached 75% at the end of 2020. Although overall upward movement was consistent, highest escalation was seen from 1990 to 2000. Urban population of Indonesia grew considerably from 1970 to 2020. Initial percentage of the population living in urban areas was 12% in 1970 while the percentage was increased to 47%. For future, a growth of %10 is expected for Indonesia from 2020 to 2040.

[@ieltstimeZ]

I'm happy to hear that you've found my content helpful! Best of luck on your upcoming test. You're making great progress, and I'm confident that you'll perform well on your exam! Now, let's focus on refining your essay. Firstly, it's important to group similarities and differences together in a logical manner. Try dedicating separate paragraphs to countries that share similar trends, discussing their changes comprehensively. This will enhance the clarity and organization of your analysis. Secondly, pay attention to the link between your sentences. Using appropriate linking words will improve the flow and coherence of your essay. Take care to transition smoothly between ideas for a more polished presentation. Lastly, while your language is generally clear and suitable for an academic essay, be mindful of minor grammatical errors such as missing articles and inconsistencies in tense usage (e.g.("Malaysia was the country facing" versus "Thailand faced")) Keep up the excellent work!

[@AnjelieBulalayao]

THANK YOU OR EXPLAINING IT CLEARLY SIR

[@ieltstimeZ]

Glad you found it useful!

[@doctorsvlog4286]

Thank you so much for this video

[@ieltstimeZ]

Most welcome 😊

[@alirezabehnamnia1550]

❤❤❤❤Thanks for good points

[@ieltstimeZ]

I'm glad you found the points helpful😊

[@nanakofisompahene7853]

wow you are the best😇

[@ieltstimeZ]

Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed the video! 😊

[@nhihoang348]

i think this essay lacks details, it shows lots of surpassing points but they werent mentioned in the essay.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Thank you for your feedback. In IELTS Task 1, summarizing data is key, often involving grouping information rather than detailing every point. I aimed for a concise summary of urban population changes but I'll consider adding more details for clarity in future tasks.

[@farhanaakhter7969]

It helped me a lot ❤. Please upload more regular videos like this

[@ieltstimeZ]

Glad you found it useful. Sure, I will do my best.😊

[@Learningwithbenefits]

Why we use numbers In overview?

[@ieltstimeZ]

When we say no numbers in the overview, it means no detailed data points from the graph (e.g., rose from ___ to ___). Mentioning the year is totally fine as the graph shows information about both the past and the future.

[@user-hj3dx2fm6q]

no sentence variation who have similar sentence for two time in single body one paragraph..

[@ieltstimeZ]

Thank you for your feedback! I believe the paragraph provides sufficient variation for clearly presenting statistical data. However, if you think otherwise, please clarify. Your input is appreciated!

[@user-hj3dx2fm6q]

@@ieltstimeZ sir could you make video again on this same task in more advanced way. sir plss try to make. thnks

[@user-hj3dx2fm6q]

otherwise thnku so much for your reply.

[@mohammadidhrisidris6856]

Yes I am agree ok thank you sir ❤

[@ieltstimeZ]

Thanks for your comment. You don't need 'am' in 'I agree with you.'❤️

[@setigrg7281]

Please provide pdf 🙏

[@ieltstimeZ]

Sure: drive.google.com/file/d/1FzRmvn9nkRXS7yXrFRgbssuCPaWWfUiG/view?usp=sharing

[@abillashom8623]

Will you correct my answer and let me the band score i get from you sir . Will you do that for me sir ?

[@ieltstimeZ]

Sure, feel free to share your answer, and I'll read it and provide feedback. However, I won't be giving it a band score.

[@khangvo6572]

do we need the comparison in line graph? in this example, i cannot see it

[@ieltstimeZ]

The answer to the first part of your question (do we need the comparison in a line graph?) is that we need to make comparisons where relevant, and it is not just about line graphs; it is about all types of writing task 1. However, to be honest, it is mostly relevant, and we should do that. About this sample, I did include some sentences that explicitly show the comparisons, such as the following examples, but for sure, there is room for improvement: 1- From 1970 to 2020, Malaysia and Indonesia saw remarkable increases in their urban population percentages from 30% to 75% and about 12% to 50%, respectively. (Comparison between Malaysia and Indonesia) 2- Moreover, estimations indicate further growth for these countries, with numbers climbing to around 82% and 60% for Malaysia and Indonesia, respectively. (Comparison between Malaysia and Indonesia) 3- Meanwhile, The Philippines' urban population rose from about 31% to 48% between 1970 and 1990. Although there was a slight decrease to around 42% in 2010, it has since continued to grow and is anticipated to peak at about 55% in 2040. (Comparison between different years for The Philippines) 3- Similarly, Thailand went up in 2020 compared to 1970, with numbers rising to about 30% from 19%. The country's urban population is estimated to surge, with a rise to approximately 49% in 2040. (Comparison between different years for Thailand)

[@mdhannan5579]

Thank you

[@ieltstimeZ]

Most welcome

[@rafsanayan7443]

Thanks boss 😃🎉

[@ieltstimeZ]

Welcome 😊

[@abillashom8623]

Sir Nice talking to you sir . I watched couple of video of yours, i have gone through lot of practise so far watching your videos only sir . I will drop you my way of answer sir, would you mind check it and read it And please let me know the band score which would you give me for my answer sir

[@ieltstimeZ]

Sure, feel free to share your answer, and I'll read it and provide feedback. However, I won't be giving it a band score.

[@AspireMan-b1g]

Hello , I can't thank you enough for your time and efforts. Thanks alot for this video. However I have couple questions. 1. Why do you say Philippines' not Philippines's 2. Is it correct to say like "Thailand went up in 2020 compared to 1970, with numbers rising to about 30% from 19%". its not Thailand that grew but the population. Also if you dont mind , could you please provide me with any feedback on how I could improve my writing task 1 essays. I have been struggling alot. Thanks in advance.. here is my essay: The graph illustrates data showing the proportion of people in 4 different Asian countries who live in cities between 1970 to 2020 as well as an anticipation for the percentage from 2030 to 2040. Overall , as the data suggests, Malaysia shows the highest percentage of population in both year intervals . Thailand and Philippines's population fluctuated , and Indonesia's population has a steady increase . During 1970 , Philippines and Malaysia's population was present more in cities, averaging about 30% of the total population, while Indonesia and Thailand's population rounded up to 20% being in cities. Next , all of the countries showed a gradual increase of population living in cities except Philippines's population fluctuated. In 2020 , Malaysia's percentage remained the highest, about 75% , while Indonesia's percentage was roughly 50%. Thailand and Philippines's proportion was both less than half. According to the future vision, the information provides an anticipation which shows an increase in all of the 4 countries's population living in cities. Apparently, in 2040 , Malaysia's population will constitute approximately 80% of the cities , 60% for Indonesia , and about 50% for both Philippines and Thailand.

[@ieltstimeZ]

Hi. You're welcome. I'm glad you found the feedback helpful. Regarding your first question, when a singular noun already ends in an "s," there is some flexibility in how the possessive form is written. Both 's and s' are considered acceptable. For example, you can write James's car OR James' car. Similarly, for 'Philippines,' both Philippines's and Philippines' are considered grammatically correct. As for your second question, it is clear from the overall context of the essay that I'm discussing the urban population percentages in different Asian countries, so adding the word ‘population’ again may be redundant. Here are some specific feedback points: 1- Your paraphrase is good enough; just consider writing 'proportions' and 'anticipations' in the plural. However, your overview seems somewhat unclear. The graph shows both past and future data, so it should be evident from your overview what generally happened or will happen to the percentages. I mean, the reader should be able to understand the changes even without looking at the graph. To check this, you can give your essay to someone to read without the graph and ask if they understand the changes. 2- The way you present the data in your body paragraphs sometimes is vague, and the reader does not grasp the changes. To avoid this problem, you should mention both the previous and future percentages. For instance, instead of '…rounded up to 20% being in cities / averaged around 30% / constitute approximately 80% of the cities, 60% for Indonesia, and about 50%…," you should clearly state what the percentages were and what they will be. For example, "rose from …% to …% between 1970 and 1990." In other words, you need to use language that describes changes, such as 'increased' or 'declined significantly.' 3- When you mention 'fluctuated,' you should show the range 'from… to…'; otherwise, it will be unclear. 4- Instead of 'the information provides an anticipation which shows…,' you should use 'is anticipated/projected/expected/forecast.' With these minor grammatical and clarity improvements, your essay will be even stronger. Keep up the good work!

[@kushanisajinika2169]

❤Thank you

[@ieltstimeZ]

You're welcome!

[@CutiePaws-9]

Thank You...