If Dollar Stores Could Meet

[@alostrich]

Subscribe or read DJ Tanner’s autobiography

[@snoopywriter3643]

I read it, boy was it a full house of secrets in there.

[@jimmcclure7720]

Never heard of him........Sooooo....that's a NO. But I did subscribe when you first started the channel....do I get a cookie and a glass of Clover Valley milk??

[@tealvampyre]

Cut...it...out! (But seriously, subscribe!)

[@bruceschneider4928]

Whattaya mean "or?"

[@UmmYeahOk]

“Oh Mylanta!”

[@TheKnizzine]

Dude if Dollar General partnered with Five Below and started selling games from two console generations ago it would be like Kmart never went under.

[@southernfriedmedia3968]

you sir are Genius

[@geraldpfeffer]

I am just imagining potential pandemonium if they started selling old Pokemon DS games. Note: Nintendo doesn't make DS games anymore so the only options available are paying hundreds of dollars for an authenticated copy, paying 30 bucks for a fake, and hoping it works (and then having it erase 220 hours of save-data like mine did, IT HAD MY FIRST SHINY and I have been playing pokemon for more than a decade), or just downloading an emulator and a ROM and playing it on your computer

[@kevinramsey417]

Five Below sells what now?

[@esw01407]

Oh it's worse. You'd be back at Ames. *Hears the northeast faint*

[@kathygolonka6944]

@@esw01407 oh you didn't hear Ames is the process of making a comeback

[@MCeili]

“ honey, the dollar stores are in the yard again.” Love the ending.

[@1whitkat]

Just turn the hose on them.

[@kellydavis3108]

Let's appreciate Matt for going through the trouble of making and ordering all these logo shirts.

[@neverlistentome]

Let's all appreciate that he probably already owned them.

[@ursaltydog]

or....... he's worked at each one in the past.... I swear I see some of the same employees recycled from store to store... either that.. or they're all dumpster diving.

[@elizabethcobb3316]

@@neverlistentome hear hear! Kudos to all of Matt's productions!

[@higgy82]

Theyre all available online.

[@patricksechowski2134]

They were only a dollar

[@MrsAlmaTrumble]

Lol. Just wait till Dollar Tree and Family Dollar find out they're related.

[@killersopinion1829]

Came here to say this! They should have....oh my....he did kinda make mention of it.

[@jeremybaldwin9704]

😂😂😂😂

[@Dman0001]

They are in the south. They already know

[@k86_]

Bahhaaha

[@liznichols4916]

​@@Dman0001BURN!!!

[@bostonhockeyco]

DT: "We're expanding, baby!" DG: "So that's where the extra 25¢ is going..."

[@Charles96777]

"Air hi-five due to budget constraints" 😂😂😂

[@I_Heart_Hader]

Classic

[@kimberlysmith9001]

That was great. I so wanted “honey” to come out the front door with her broom to take care of them and the dollar stores to go scramblin’ like chickens.

[@BryonLape]

Broom? Grab the 12 gauge.

[@victoriam.4927]

I was thinking a shotgun, personally.

[@skydyverjym]

Shotgun

[@beckyhorn6266]

Yes, me too!

[@Lunzatis_Palemoon]

Nah. "Honey" would have come out with a 12 gage like Granny from The Beverly Hillbillies.

[@predictorbibulous3327]

This dude is hilarious. "Air high five due to budget constraints"

[@jphilb]

Apparently can’t afford the fancy special effects.

[@allanbranson]

Made me laugh out loud

[@jch77]

@@jphilb even if he can afford them its funnier without them

[@jch77]

@@allanbranson same

[@MooBerry2009]

I read it as he said it.

[@asdisskagen6487]

As someone who lives in an area where Dollar Generals pop up like mushrooms after a rainstorm, I would welcome the variety brought by both Dollar Tree and Family Dollar.

[@melindaunknown6411]

I like them all! In a town with only Walmart and Save-a-lot to shop, the 3 dollar stores are good.

[@oneminuteofmyday]

So you basically live everywhere? lol Our small town is getting its third Dollar General - one store per square mile of town. We finally got a Dollar Tree in the strip mall with the empty K-Mart building, though. 🎉lol

[@williamsample2631]

Be careful what you wish for

[@williamsample2631]

​@@melindaunknown6411 Walmart used to mean that your town had arrived in the big time. Now it just means half empty shelves, no service and a diminishing selection of goods!

[@RottenRogerDM]

General Family Tree Dollar store.

[@noobforpresident2024]

I’m pretty sure Matt is the only person to ever own a DG, Family Dollar, and Dollar Tree shirt at the same time.

[@ladennayoung2939]

Probably had them made for the skit.

[@KiaBelle]

I totally forgot dollar tree was first in the malls. This skit is epic.

[@squidproquo1130]

I didn't realize that was a thing everywhere, I thought that was just going on in my town.

[@DavidLLambertmobile]

If I HAD to spend $$$ at these stores 🛒 I'd shop at Dollar Tree. Most in Florida are clean, have decent items. Family Dollar has soft drinks & soda brands I haven't seen for 30+ years! 😟

[@MrMosebysLobby]

​@@DavidLLambertmobile Florida dollar trees have the good shit I swear. Midwest ones can't compare. Fuckin shrimp and cheese ravioli for 2.50 is guilty pleasure central

[@akcalo]

I had no idea! Or I forgot

[@uniquelybeautiful5633]

Me too 😂

[@faithcastillo9597]

The nostalgia factor is off the charts at the mention of all those stores I shopped at, but which now reside only in our memories and retail heaven.

[@Rick_Sanchez_C137_]

Hell….. most of them are in retail hell. There is no retail Heaven, not really, it’s a small place with a few stores that sold religious items just over cost for a couple years until the landlord raised their rent and they went under; let’s face it, any store selling religious items that stays open longer than five years isn’t run by someone wanting to provide people with religious items, it’s run by someone who saw a niche and has a high markup (or is a front for the mob with a lot of cash sales on the books despite a lack of moving inventory)……

[@seatspud]

J.K. Gill's: (directed at the dollar stores) "Am I a joke to you?" Small World Gifts and Novelties: "Dude, let it go." (Shakes head, still thinking about Spencer's and Hot Topic)

[@recoveringsoul755]

I loved Zany Brainy!! I'd spend hours there with my kids. Son playing with the Thomas the Train setup, daughter looking at the dollhouses and reading the books...it was like a playdate with supervision and other kids. Poor kids today can't even meet people in real life

[@faithcastillo9597]

@@seatspud loved Spencer's and Hot Topic.

[@enigmalfidelity]

Want nostalgia? I wish they'd open up the "Sanfransisco" stores again. Nothing like a store that's half nick nacks, half sex toys... "Don't go in the back area. That's the adult area" as the toys and items literally blend with the adult stuff as you get closer to the back. I was like 7 when I saw giant rubber fists in a bucket in the back of the store...

[@TigerHistalmos]

"Honey, the dollar stores are in the yard again." Great stuff as always.

[@lovebuzz1979]

Gotta get me a Dollar tree shirt.🤣🤣 Your hilarious! "What in the Clover Valley is going on here" hahaha 🤣😆

[@debco12]

I died at that one! Matt is freakin' hilarious!

[@rococogoth]

My soul cries for KB Toys, Radio Shack, and Walden books! I used to love those stores.

[@seatspud]

The Tinder Box: (takes a long drag) "Doubt anybody misses me nowadays."

[@yurmabeechaudits3522]

So why did so many Americans turn their backs on them?

[@rococogoth]

@@yurmabeechaudits3522 I cannot and would not dare speak for a whole country, I know I used to frequent Walden Book and KBT until they closed.

[@THOMAS_VANN]

Is it bad I only know about radio shack

[@rococogoth]

@@THOMAS_VANN Nah, it happens. There was one store I had never heard of in the skit. :)

[@brostrait17]

You know it’s bad when you have a family dollar and a general right next door to each other. I’ll just be heading down to the Piggly Wiggly one day and I’ll see a dollar general employee and a family dollar employee going at it over some pool noodles 😂

[@SarahRenz59]

We have a Dollar General next to a Big Lots. Does that count?

[@marthahawkinson-michau9611]

You still have Piggly Wiggly stores? I haven’t seen one of those in decades….

[@Dulcess]

I stay where dollar tree and family dollar share a parking lot, they are on opposite ends. If you go a couple streets down you can find a dollar general. 🥴

[@tswain92_]

​@@Dulcess Living the dream.

[@Dulcess]

@@tswain92_ 😂

[@sab3295]

😂😂 so that's where the 25¢ is going 😂

[@Hiediho2337]

This exact thing happened last year in my little town. We had the Dollar General and just down the road the Dollar Tree/Family Dollar built. We do, if fact, shop at both.😄

[@thebigdog2295]

There's a Dollar General, and Family Dollar/Dollar Tree right next to each other just down the road from where I live. I haven't shopped at both of them YET. But I'm sure it's going to happen sooner, or later. 😁😅😂🤣

[@lancelambert9124]

We have that here, we call it Dollar Holler.

[@apriltini]

We have that too! Ours are across the "highway" from each other.

[@HillaryMoore]

We have that here. The DG has been here a few years, but the new combo store opened just before Christmas. I shop both. Especially while waiting on laundry at the laundromat. We're a tiny town < 1000 residents in a rural southern Indiana county.

[@Brainrot_Rat]

Husband: “Honey the dollar stores are in the yard again!” Wife: “*random mumbling walking outside* GO ON GIT”

[@HeartlandHunny]

Aw, remember when malls had bookstores? Better days…

[@druid_zephyrus]

I mean... kinda. Malls were a terrible thing that were used for money laundering and property manipulation, but go off!

[@tswain92_]

Memories😢

[@debco12]

Remember when we had malls?

[@CDRiley]

Remember when we had moody Security Guards?

[@yurmabeechaudits3522]

What's a mall? Or a book? 😂

[@shawnkurtz4424]

You missed a golden opportunity to come out as the homeowner with a spray bottle yellin "go on git"

[@elizabethdowney3412]

"Honey, get the water hose."

[@shawnkurtz4424]

@elizabethdowney3412 "nah, we can't waste the good water on the likes of them"

[@elizabethdowney3412]

Oh right..."Honey, get the fly swatter."

[@ThinWhiteAxe]

yess

[@MrChristianDT]

And Dollar Tree just seeing the spray bottle & being like, "OH, hey! We have those for a couple weeks every few months sometimes!"

[@charles0322mrsdani]

Honey the dollar stores are in the yard again...get the hose

[@CASEMSTR]

"you sell $5 steaks!?" "No" "Whew-" "They are only a dollar" Still laughing 4 days later

[@rayjohnson2387]

Gotta love the candy selection at 5 below...they even have zots...i thought they quit making those 40 years ago 🤣

[@lorijudd2151]

... they did! So that means they DO live forever!

[@rayjohnson2387]

@lorijudd2151 if they had Marathon bars...I'd move in lol

[@asdisskagen6487]

They did stop making Zots 40 years ago; they're still just working through the inventory...

[@rayjohnson2387]

@@asdisskagen6487 that explains why they're 10 for a buck lol

[@thecreek7152]

That's cuz Zots caused zits.

[@DottyGale8]

"Would people shop at both?" LOL! Yes. Yes, I will go from DG to DT! :D

[@rubywingo6030]

It is scary how spot on these videos are! This guy is a genius!😂

[@meco1124]

As a member of an alabama rural community, I am happy to announce the we NOW have three dollar stores within 10 miles of each other on the same highway with an addition of a NEW family dollar/dollar tree combo. The road has now been termed dollar holler

[@Heavenlyhounds96]

"Hang on, what in the Clover Valley is going on here?!" CLOVER VALLEY! XD That got me wheezing so hard for a moment, (mainly cause I used to work for DG for 2 1/2 years. I actually enjoyed it but I did get a good store and coworkers so..)

[@fakefake3113]

This is hilarious!! Very clever 👍👍 What in the Clover Valley... 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@GraceHenderson-xg6xi]

I am so happy that you mentioned Zaney Brainy! I think it was one of the best children's stores ever! I worked for 6 different stores during my 3 yrs with the company.LOVED them!

[@1973chevypickup]

Thank you for clarifying they're breaking ground for a new store. I seriously thought DG was hiding the body of KMart or something.

[@FullMoonOctober]

Why bother hiding the body? No one's looking for it anymore.

[@jillneverumind7229]

😆

[@Leamax33]

They are hiding the body.....underneath the new Dollar General

[@katwat2653]

best quote ," Honey dollar stores are in the yard again" keep up the laughs 😂

[@phillipmoody710]

"Honey, the dollar store are in the yard, again."🤣🤣🤣

[@MSR-1701]

Awesome and hilarious as always! Thanks for what you do, Matt!

[@HiImKangarou]

"Air High-5 due to budget constraints!" Always love a good self-aware joke.

[@kevinramsey417]

I miss shopping malls, I practically lived at Waldenbooks. Air h-five due to budget constraints.

[@Wyndamn]

Waldenbooks was pure awesomeness , before borders, barnes & noble and books-a-million.......there was Waldenbooks.

[@kevinramsey417]

@@Wyndamn Well I do like Books-a-Million because they have baristas but totally. Also, I hate that Dollar Stores aren't really Dollar Stores anymore.

[@Wyndamn]

@@kevinramsey417 I love Books-A-Million as well, I have a membership and everything. I wish they still sold comic books 😔😔😔 but it's still an awesome place to hangout 😃😃😃.

[@charlottemajewski5992]

I miss Waldenbooks and B Dalton.

[@lindaseel9986]

"Hunny! The Dollar Stores are in the yard again!" 😂😂😂😂

[@ManyBothansDied]

"Due to budget constraints" got me hacking up a lung from laughing too hard. My boss is gonna figure out I'm not working.

[@debbyfigueroa7787]

Dang, he hit with the KB toys and everything! 😂 This one was too good and too accurate. Lol

[@RR-it2rt]

In the last month, DeBerry Tx just opened a Dollar Tree/Family Dollar combo store. One building, one entrance. The building has both signs on it. There are two Dollar Generals, each a mile or less from the new store. Another Family Dollar Store about 4 miles down the road. Life in small town East Texas.😂😂😂

[@BobbiJo]

😆 @ thats where the extra 25 cents is going. So true about all the boxes in DG!

[@Bad_Llama]

"Air high five due to budget constraints" had me rolling.

[@_Amplified]

"Honey the dollar stores are in the yard again" had me laughing so hard

[@Warriormon87]

Aww Zainy Brainy. Remebering them made me think of them and Toys R Us and Discocery Zone and then I got sad by all the stuff our kids will never get to experience.

[@apriltini]

This is so on topic. We actually have this mess in my county. On one side of the "highway" is a combo Dollar Tree and Family Dollar, and on the other side, just smidge down a bit is a Dollar General. I shake my head every time I pass them.

[@Jusoon]

"Air high five due to budget restraints" had me laughing.

[@Wyndamn]

Got dang it he's right !!!! I do remember seeing dollar tree in the mall, and WOW Walden Books brought back a lot of memories of reading comic books off of those spinning wire racks and SLAM Magazine........( getting old sucks but the memories make it awesome😊😊😊)

[@kynn23]

B. Dalton was my favorite (fond memories of buying Baby-Sitters Club books there), but Walden Books was an acceptable substitute when my mom was shopping upstairs instead of downstairs.

[@jfterrell]

Loved B. Dalton and use to work the calendar kiosk seasonally for Waldenbooks who was owned by Border’s. I think B. Dalton and Books A Million were related.

[@garystielow232]

"Air high five due to budget constraints" Hilarious! I had to subscribe.

[@rondadams]

I'm really surprised that Dollar General hasn't figured out to make their stores using pre-fab mobile buildings. It would save them a LOT of money, then they could just up and move every now and then. Also, DG should partner with Waffle House. They already have the same color scheme, and you know at least half the people that visit a DG also visit WH on a regular basis. Just combine the two already, call it Waffle House General Store!

[@michelledeleon1842]

sure, it'd be the knockoff Cracker Barrel

[@LukeMaps]

With all the boxes at DG and the fights at Waffle House, boxing matches would be a nightly event!

[@lorenstribling6096]

They could start a line of WH merch.

[@gloriaalex11]

This here is some marketing genius. Make sure somebody pays y'all for your ideas.

[@nerdypunkin4336]

Not a bad idea 😂😂😂😂but

[@wendimooreart]

On my way to work (in Alabama), I pass a Dollar General on the right, with a Family Dollar/Dollar Tree combo across the street. I live in the city, but commute to the country. It seems backward, but I work an office job in an area where there are several manufacturing facilities. There isn’t much else way out there.

[@tylerlawrence5404]

Simply funnier than any other group of comedians!

[@TracyfromNC]

Genius and dedication with those t shirts! What in the clover valley!😂😂😂

[@TracyT5150]

Matt is a blessing to all who are depressed. Thank You for getting through bad times. ❤🎉😅

[@halg3625]

All those stores are taking over my town. We have one of each, every mile, along 105, I'm not kidding.

[@annam1969]

Great channel. Keep it comming Matt. Love the material. Soo funny.

[@PenPalAnna]

I appreciate this so much. Less than two miles away is a Dollar General across the road from a Family Dollar Tree.

[@isabeauwolf562]

This is so accurate! 😆We have 2 Dollar Generals and then they built a Dollar Tree/Family Dollar in my town in December. We are literally in the middle of nowhere, yet 30 minutes away from everything at the same time.

[@random2829]

Just spent the last week in Delhi, Louisiana and this is EXACTLY what I saw!

[@LorisWhirled]

God bless this man.

[@danielroberts6328]

Literally every small town in Colorado has a Family Dollar. Without fail. Tiny town in the middle of knowhere that you have to cross multiple mountain passes to get to, guaranteed to have a Family Dollar

[@LanceMan]

I worked for DT and Family Dollar. My wife worked for DG and my daughter worked for FD and DG...lol. I also know the very first employee of DollarTree. He was my boss when I worked there...lol

[@joeljackson2675]

St. Augustine, Tx has the trifecta. All three nextdoor. Family and Tree are in the same building.

[@mariejustme]

Ooh, my life just flashed before my eyes. 😂 Thanks, Matt. I needed that. ❤

[@enerioffutt1881]

I may live in the Pacific Northwest but I absolutely LOVE Dollar Tree...even with it becoming Dollar and Twenty-Five Cents Tree.

[@johnyg8183]

I have to take my truck to Pep Boys. Previously, they'd had a service desk at the back of their retail store. But now they had a service desk in a space like an oversized closet, and a Dollar General had opened in their retail space. I immediately thought of this video, went home, and started checking my front lawn.

[@jodisue741]

Thanks for making this tired nurse's day 😂😂

[@evelynthompson755]

Family dollar is owned by Dollar Tree, so that should be interesting when they find out. Love your videos!😀

[@Bacopa68]

Around here Family Dollar is an inner city and suburban decay store. Dollar Tree has its own niche, and Dollar General is rural.

[@armorhand3332]

"Honey, the dollar stores are in the yard again" LMAO Yeah, the Dollar Tree/Family Dollar combo stores....sheesh.... DT is actually FD's daddy....lol....

[@Marr-in-Memphis]

I appreciate the KZbin algorithm suggesting this gem to me. Brilliant writing & editing. Gotta share this one.👍🏼

[@SarushaIsMyName]

"Honey, the dollar stores are in the yard again...." LMFAO

[@GEAUXUNA]

What in the clover Valley 😂 priceless

[@judithfejedelem1754]

What a talent! And imagination. Keep up the great work😊

[@janejones7638]

Yep, that sounds about right. I remember in college I did most of my shopping at Dollar Tree for make-up and cheap food. Thos days it was a $1 and that's all I could afford to spend. Right now I feel lucky that I'm able to afford Walmart. On really lucky days, I go to Publix (clean floors, shelves, people what a luxury).

[@ShadowDaPk]

Gotta appreciate the perfectly decent guy dealing with this insanity *again*

[@adambuskirk2222]

Irony since Dollar Tree owns Family Dollar

[@anonymuswere]

and no piece of the NORTH, either. we have ALL THREE in the same town, and i shop em all. and we now have a five Below ON TOP OF THAT!

[@JoeXTheXJuggalo1]

The home owner character reminds me of a story about one of my friends. His small city has a family dollar and I believe a dollar tree and a dollar general supermarket close to each other but that's not the bad thing. When dollar general got in their overzealous store placements they put like 3 more dollars generals in his town and when they was talking about building another the city's citizens actually made a petition to tell city's higher up and dollar general no more and to stop.

[@skydiverclassc2031]

I was waiting for a three way face off in the yard, just like The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.

[@wetwillyis_1881]

Props to Dollar General using an Ames shovel. I now want “If Home Improvement Stores” could meet. Lowe’s vs. Home Depot would be awesome.

[@elizabethcobb3316]

Great idea 👍

[@rcschmidt668]

That would be epic!

[@stillatwork]

He should role play them as divorced formally married couple because that is pretty much true with their origin, with ace being the elder with a bag of popcorn, and then whatever other brands he wants to throw in there

[@arcwiz]

@@stillatwork Wonder what Harbor Freight would be

[@marthahawkinson-michau9611]

@@arcwiz upstart immigrant punk?

[@blueskiesarelovely]

In the town that my mom lives in (in Texas) we call it the Dollar Store Mall because it's set up just like this😂😂😂😂😂

[@sbyrstall]

"Honey, the dollar stores are in the yard again.". Love it. 💕

[@bluebutterfly244]

Not a joke, we have a Dollar General in a strip mall and a Dollar Tree opened a few doors down in the same strip mall. Saw that and was like, it's about to get real. 😂

[@rambofan334]

"Air high five due to budget constraints." Oh god, they've become self-aware.

[@Ralphinsc]

I can't believe you missed the opportunity to bring in Dollar General's bougie cousin Popshelf....... lol.

[@lastofgiants]

"Air five, due to budget restraints!" 😂

[@redfishtex738]

Went there on Wednesday and spent way too much. Made grab bags of stuff from the Easter Bunny for the kids. Matt can you dress up in a Easter Bunny outfit? You know for the kids. Hey if John Wayne can do it. Hope you and your family have a great Easter!

[@codystrader7594]

That was John Wayne Gracy.

[@R-M18]

​@@codystrader7594HAHAHA

[@undoubtedcrow8010]

😳

[@redfishtex738]

@Cody Strader John Wayne did too. I think it was for an episode of Laugh In.

[@NoahLawson-kc5ve]

Them building in a random back yard feels so true.

[@Tmalik21g]

Just genius. Had me laughing so loud I woke my daughter up from her nap.

[@sarahsanders7127]

Well that included a blast from the past that I did not expect.

[@billnolte8644]

This is what It's a Southern Thing now aspires to. And I miss Waldenbooks desperately!

[@souljadawg4]

“Air high five due to budget constraints”😂😂

[@Stevie8654]

Around my area, DG is in small towns, dollar tree is in the suburbs, and Family Dollar is in the ghetto

[@jabronjunklove760]

Yes, that is true where I'm at, too.

[@GEORGIABOY23]

So glad I didn’t skip this😂

[@1craley878]

Love the ending "honey, the dollar stores are in the yard again "

[@SeanEasterling]

Got a FD /DT opening in my neighborhood now right across the street from DG. 😅

[@pamglass6007]

You nailed them all! 🤣

[@a.h.g.9kokushibo]

"Air high-five due to budget constraints" ha ha.

[@cerisenoir2457]

This literally happened in my town. We had a dollar general for years, they moved down the street to a slightly bigger building then a couple months later we got out “Family Tree” store built right across from it.

[@6thgraderfriends]

From a small town, just over 3,000 people, Family Dollar found it and moved in a few years ago. It felt so odd to not have any chain stores and then one showed up one day. Also, they put sensors on everything in case of theft but theft is minimum.