If the Greek Gods were F*&% boys

[@chillobsidian9592]

Little did you know, the Greek Gods *were* the first F-Boys. I mean seriously, Zeus was literally a walking unstoppable F-Boy

[@AgentAnime95]

Apollo was the most unlikable one. Like he pulled no bitches to a point of turning into a flower just to try to pull.

[@l4rgo911]

I love how most comments are basically folks looking at the title and saying "What do you mean 'IF'?"

[@TheSadowdragonGroup]

Except Hades. Hades just wanted to do his job and chill with his wife but people kept breaking into his house and beating up his dog.

[@chillobsidian9592]

@@TheSadowdragonGroup All hail Lord Hades indeed.

[@jaxe8321]

Zeus the rapist

[@Exoryn]

...What do you mean "if?"

[@cake_made_of_bacon3710]

Dang it. You beat me to it

[@sumitpandey8066]

Damn You both beat me

[@royalkina]

Yeah, felt that way too

[@terrnoisrp8894]

Dang it should have known someone would beat me

[@luckstin9680]

So true

[@James-nr2hi]

I love that you made this a "What if" but this is just how the Greek Gods actually acted

[@C3H6N6O6.]

The only difference is that the gods in this sketch were respectful of consent

[@James-nr2hi]

@@C3H6N6O6. true

[@anuragjuyal7614]

@@C3H6N6O6. damn

[@Midnight-wh2bs]

@@anuragjuyal7614 I mean, he's not wrong, iirc one of the main interpretations of Medusa's story is Athena turning her into the monster after Poseidon forced himself onto her in Athena's temple. Also, you know, all the things that Zeus went to pound town on.

[@ElvinMayenCarrillo]

You are talking like Greek gods actually existed XD

[@thebaldcat6708]

Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades’s relationship is basically Zeus and Poseidon sharing one brain cell while Hades does everything he can to leave the conversation

[@luisandrade2254]

Lol as if hades was better

[@derpmaster878]

@@luisandrade2254 He was, no matter what you read in Percy Jackson.

[@luisandrade2254]

@@derpmaster878 lol he wasn’t no matter who Percy Jackson is

[@TheSucram729]

@@derpmaster878 he was portrayed very accurately in Percy Jackson actually

[@thebaldcat6708]

@@luisandrade2254 People hear ‘king of the underworld’ and they can see is satan. Let me compile a list of all the worst Zeus, Poseidon and Hades have done shall we! Zeus: Being a serial rapist Condemning Prometheus to permanent torture for helping out humans Raping his own daughter Persephone (In one myth, could be excluded from head cannon) Definitely having sex with and impregnating his own great grand daughter Poseidon: Being a serial rapist Taking away a women’s right to vote in Athen for hundreds of years Being responsible for his grandson’s death (Hippolytus) Hades: Kidnapping and marrying his niece Persephone (on Zeus’s orders bwt) Condemning Theseus and his brother Periphes to torture for trying to kidnap Persephone Tricking Persephone to bind herself to the underworld so she had to come back to him Now let me ask, which one of these people is the worst? (I’d say Zeus)

[@kiphackman702]

Zach adding ‘If’ to the title to boost viewer engagement from people correcting him, Genius.

[@sokaize]

Absolutely

[@AmaraJordanMusic]

That's diabolical. I approve. 🤣

[@deltrae3]

Meanwhile there's Hades with a steady job, a house and a wife...

[@arpansaha2111]

Whome he KIDNAPPED

[@davidcrusher1436]

That only in a few versions of the story’s

[@exosproudmamabear558]

@@arpansaha2111 What was he supposed to do? Her mother was a psychopath and he couldn't leave. You gotta meet with your bride to be able to marry.

[@Midnight-wh2bs]

@@arpansaha2111 I mean, yeah, but somehow they still have the healthiest relationship in the entire pantheon. Also like the other guy said that's only how it went in some versions.

[@rhyshow3462]

@@arpansaha2111 I was technically an arranged marriage since Hades asked Zeus for her hand (Zeus being the father), and Zeus agreed and gave advice as to what the best way to get Persephone was, and considering it was Zeus, even if you didn't know how it was going to happen, you still know it was going to be F*&%ed up, and even then it was prety tame for Zeus. Now don't get me wrong, it was still an F*&%ed up thing to do, but it was still pretty tame

[@Crym123]

Considering the history of cult prostitution in temples, the name suggestions were pretty valid

[@lucofparis4819]

Except 'cult prostitution' was a particularly rare thing, occurring only in some circumstances, and specifically tied to love goddesses such as Aphrodite. In the ancient Greek world, the Temple of Aphrodite in Corinth was precisely renowned because of this practice, in contrast to virtually all other temples. By the way, the 'prostitutes' in question were slaves owned by the temple. Not quite f-boy vibe.

[@lucofparis4819]

@Oni Not even all temples of Aphrodite would have tolerated that. That was very much a Corinthian thing in the greek world, a thing Corinthians specifically got a bad rap for doing. In other words, it was the sulfurous and fringe exception rather than the norm.

[@xxxhero7275]

@@lucofparis4819 we gonna forget Dionysus’s cult was literally about getting drunk and having sex?

[@davidalacabo4298]

@@xxxhero7275 ei yo sign me up

[@Grey1608]

2:52 missed a perfect opportunity for Zeus to say “well that’s my wife”

[@destroyercreater98]

More “well that’s my wife….. AND my sister”

[@corruptangel6793]

I think it was on purpose because Zeus isn't loyal to her at all.

[@destroyercreater98]

@@corruptangel6793 fair enough. Honestly it’s a miracle those two are STILL married.

[@corruptangel6793]

@@destroyercreater98 well, you can't exactly be the godess of marriage if you get a divorce.

[@tombarter3287]

IKR!

[@GabeIDK2]

This is literally how they acted. Like, this isn’t a “what if”. This is just a historical fact.

[@kredonystus7768]

Historical?

[@justinusjulius5007]

@@kredonystus7768 Mythological

[@mysterious_truth6907]

They're even worse than this

[@tetokesenye397]

as someone who read Percy Jackson books this is not a matter of question, it is an undeniable fact

[@Norsedragoon]

As someone who has read any history book regarding Greece/Rome, this is fact, except poor Hades. Only god in that whole pantheon who actually did his job.

[@johnnybullfrog8941]

Isn’t half of Greek mythology how Zeus messed something up by screwing something.

[@duskonparis]

As someone who enjoys mythology, please dont use the Percy Jackson book as a reference. Its so unbelievablly inaccurate.

[@grimmjowdoug5031]

Right like if the title was if they weren't that would be even more interesting 🤣🤣

[@rjtimmerman2861]

@@johnnybullfrog8941 yes, yes it is

[@destroyercreater98]

Love that you didn’t put hades in this. Sure he was KINDA a f boy at really specific times, but at least he has a Healthy relationship with his wife that wasn’t his sister and doesn’t cheat on her for LITERALLY . ANYTHING . That EXISTS.

[@rain_amiss2733]

I also think Hades probably had one of the healthiest marriages out of the well known greek gods, but about that "not his sister" part... She was his niece... Not sure if that's equally bad or worse, but I wouldn't mention his family relation to his wife as a positive...

[@jackwriter1908]

​@@rain_amiss2733 It's better then the sister... I mean they basically kept it in the family the entire time, so the further they are apart... the better...

[@aamonjaeger3749]

@@rain_amiss2733 You know Zeus literally f'ed his sister and also f'ed his grandma.........also f'ed his aunt for nine consecutive days

[@destroyercreater98]

@@rain_amiss2733 married his niece is better then sleeping with nearly all your sisters in my book. Especially if you did one while as a horse…. I’m looking at you Poseidon.

[@alenasenie6928]

"Wasn't his sister" Nope, it was his niece

[@2xtoo145]

Zeus was an F-boy to anything that moved

[@summerrose8110]

It's called rape.

[@SpacebarKodo]

"Anything that moves" your underestimating him

[@АндрейКиктев-д5у]

Ok. If it doesn’t move, he’ll MAKE it move. And than just proceed with his usual dirty thing.

[@rumbazumba3189]

Zeus's seven hundred children would disagree

[@SpacebarKodo]

You said 4 billion wrong

[@JumbleMumble]

My headcanon is now that, in this universe, the greek gods take turns playing the christian god and just bro out in heaven the rest of the time.

[@somestupiddudewithayoutube4676]

Bro imagine if like ALL the gods were just real and did this

[@theonebman7581]

@@somestupiddudewithayoutube4676 I once heard of a Japanese sitcom where Jesus and Buddha were tired of being deities and just straight up decided to crash into an apartment as room mates

[@bwackbeedows3629]

@@somestupiddudewithayoutube4676 Definitely would've explained *a lot.*

[@theonebman7581]

@Oni Rome had been in crisis and disaster 150 years prior to that; arguably, Christianity might have actually _slowed_ the collapse of Rome as it unified everyone under a single faith (which centuries later also happened with the Germanic tribes and directly led to the foundation of European states like France) I'd say Rome's biggest oopsie was Gaul, since that overstretched the Empire's resources and was hard to defend iirc

[@blackout4047]

Christian god is 100% just zues after going full stalin and rewriting history n shit

[@nerve9272]

when Rick Riordan was searching for Greek context he found this, but unlike Zach, he made it PG 13.

[@jackwriter1908]

I think he really just made it sound more innocent, but once you start to think about it, there are still a lot of f*cked up things in his story, that sound realistic enough... Hades was the only one who honored the oath he had to make, while both Zeus and Poseidon broke theirs. Zeus tried to kill Hades children and once Hades found out, that Zeus couldn't keep it in his pants... A tree was created. Since Percy is the narator, I think he can get away with the PG13, after all which twelve year old would understand and then tell others about his f*cked up life and his f*cked up family.

[@cookiecraze1310]

@@jackwriter1908 by The Last Olympian he's 16. By the Trials of Apollo he's 17.

[@Animefan_7153-0]

@@cookiecraze1310 and he shows up in another series with magnus chase as the main character and there he's 18

[@jackwriter1908]

@@cookiecraze1310 yes and when the story began he was twelve. And in a few books he will be even older, get to the point.

[@cookiecraze1310]

@@Animefan_7153-0 isn't Magnus before Trials of Apollo, since it came out before and (Since they're meant for kids) the timeline is mostly consistent with book releases.

[@Marcel._B]

Poseidon: "Ey that's my sister you're talking about" Zeus: "Well, she is also my sister" Plus she is technically his wife XD

[@Hexxed705]

being a Greek mythology fan this is a great vid

[@cursedsailor7473]

Alternate title: ‘What the Greek Gods were like’

[@reretrix4980]

Aphrodite, Zeus, those 2 f*&% more around than a f-boy .The only one that doesnt fuck around was Hestia (maybe someone else as well but she has also the power (from zeus) to whithstand Aphrodite's woodo sh!t)

[@haziagat]

Plus Artemis & Athena.

[@martinnicdalsihovedetnemus6700]

@@haziagat isn't Artemis a virgin actually?

[@tristancoffin]

@@haziagat nah Artemis was a female celibate after Apollo murdered her boyfriend

[@killerbean6254]

@@tristancoffin they never dated. Orion fell in love with her yes but as far as I know she didn’t reciprocate. They were just friends

[@nickknife9681]

Hades was in a monogamous relationship.

[@dozendark2369]

As a Greek, this is quite accurate of how the Olympic God's where

[@swaggerdagger8976]

We gonna act like Zeus didn't turn himself into a swan just to smash?

[@Astinomikos_Diefthintis_Delis]

Not only swan 🤣🤣

[@derfret1365]

and Poseidon into a horse. Poseidon takes the w

[@WERTYUIO821]

@@derfret1365 Zeus: I smashed the whole Europe while being a bull, that's my W

[@corruptangel6793]

@@derfret1365 Zeus turned himself into a pile of f*cking gold coins to smash. Talk about a golden shower.

[@derfret1365]

@@WERTYUIO821 no, he just used the bull form to kidnap her, he transformed back before smashing. The result of that escapade was Minos. His wife was the one who actually smashed the bull, who was given to Minos by none other than... Poseidon, taking w after w

[@sr.lontra]

That "III KNOW" is the best running gag in this channel lmfao

[@sr.lontra]

Man, english is boring "Kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk" is more fun

[@vaibhavk2400]

I honestly love it when Zack goes “what the f is this?” or laughs u controllably, and especially the “I KNOW”, love your videos!

[@catgodkain5158]

Whos a goose

[@MJAYZ007]

this is pretty much EXACTLY how they are in real life

[@JuanGonzalez-bm1dj]

So, if the Greek Gods were regular Greek Gods.

[@summerrose8110]

Can we change the name? Because with the exception of Hades they weren't really "gods". They were bullies and rapists. We need a another name to call them.

[@venomous8700]

@@summerrose8110 How were they not gods

[@GrabbandeseNuts]

​@@summerrose8110Keep crying

[@xaveircombs2690]

But they were F-Boys

[@summerrose8110]

Rapists.

[@l4rgo911]

Honestly, Zeus treated most women like they were "loose for Zeus". Sometimes as an animal (swan, dolphin, etc), most of the times without consent. :{

[@The-Artless-Gallery]

Loose for Zeus. I'm dying over here.😅🤣😂

[@hamjudo]

Males in some species of dolphins use coercion instead of consent. In the worst frat boy traditions, they work in teams to force females to mate. Other species are more romantic.

[@mere6789]

I think there was even a cloud ☁️ once…

[@HazbinCovenWitch]

The only ones I remember was when he turned into an eagle, and a white bull.....

[@shaheenziyard5631]

Even Hera his wife/sister, became so after he raped her. She's the goddess of marriage, so once that happened she was forced to marry him or something

[@QuiescentPilot]

Now I haven’t even started the video yet, but from what I know about Greek mythology, the gods were definitely what we would now refer to as “fuckboys” so this video can only be a modern adaptation, and not a parody

[@figo3554]

You're telling me they weren't?

[@RickachuCXVI]

I love how consistent his "what the f*&% is this?" is, is the tsa guy a descendant of these guys?

[@Nub_Fish]

This just seems like a documentary on the Greek Gods

[@rainclouds4346]

Alternate title: Zeus just being Zeus

[@leabernhart8546]

IF they WERE..yes. IF. We'd have like hundreds of Demigods. What a concept. 😂

[@Bees_Animations]

Here’s an idea. The villain is nicer than the hero, and the hero is meaner than the villain.

[@krzysiekbudzisz4572]

And the "villain"s plan is actually good, while "hero" just wants to preserve status quo

[@thegod-emperorofheroes1212]

If Zeus was Zeus

[@FaeTheMf]

Fr 😂😂😂

[@5_sets_of_triangle_pasta]

Zeus did some things, man...

[@poweroffriendship2.0]

Let's not forget that Hades in the original Greek myths is actually a good guy who is doing his job. He's only evil because the modern media and pop culture viewed him as the "devil" when it's not the case.

[@carazy123_]

Didn’t he still kidnap/trick his wife tho

[@WERTYUIO821]

@@carazy123_ Kidnapped with her father's permission

[@tristancoffin]

@@WERTYUIO821 see totally different women don't need opinions amirite.

[@WERTYUIO821]

@@tristancoffin Wait until Demeter starts murmuring for all eternity and then tries to kill the whole humanity just because she doesn't approve of her daughter's wedding...

[@killerbean6254]

@@WERTYUIO821 and then Hades threatens to release the souls of the dead so nobody would die

[@campfire4597]

As someone who has read percy jackson, this is surprisingly accurate.

[@MJAYZ007]

True it pretty much sums it up

[@igglye6805]

When they started talking about getting upgraded at the Sheraton, I thought Zach was going to do one of his favors.

[@theoriginalkrabbypatty]

All the comments correcting the title makes the video that much funnier 🤣🤣

[@Tagged415]

this is legitimately an accurate representation of greek gods.

[@thelastbrickbender2139]

I feel like what if the Greek gods weren’t f%%%boys would make for a more unique spin on their mythology…

[@PrMultivers]

What do you mean "If"... Have you read anything about Greek Mythology? They were F*&% boys! Great video as always!

[@QuisbyDeity]

I knew the MOMENT "Zeus" didn't say something right away that he'd say "wtf is this" FUCKING love that it's obvious now 😂😂

[@oscarwang7227]

"Hera loves a girthy column" "That's my sister you're talking about" Weirdly, the accurate part is the incest.

[@alpha_wolf220]

as someone who spent there entire life studying the Greek myths, i could confirm this isn't all that far off. Zues and posiedon are nymphomaniacs, the biggest difference is that Zeus doesn't ask for permission, usualy turns into animals, and has repeatedly forced himself on members of his own family. zues once forced himself on his sister (demeter) and had a child with her (kore, better known as Persephone) and when persephone looked like a teen, Zeus forced himself on her in the form of a snake and the other difference is that Poseidon fathered actual species and monsters (see the horses, cyclopes, lystaegonians, pegasus and chrysaor, Charybdis, icthyocentaurs, literally all forms of life under the sea)

[@lubomirkubasdQw4w9WgXcQ]

00:36 i said that in my mind before he did i knew it

[@MyWorld-eb9oz]

I can kinda see why Poseidon would be slightly offended by his temple

[@anilgarg4682]

I looked at the title and i was like "if"?

[@CallOfCutie69]

They were Without if

[@TheKoriKasai]

What do you mean "IF"? You nailed the modern adaptation of the gods

[@arjunks316]

"NOOOOOOO....." "I KNOWWWWWW....." 😂😂 This never gets old.

[@malikapollard3618]

All aboard!! Zeus zeus!! 😂😂 I haven't been laughing much lately and this guy is really helping. Only recently saw this channel. Subscribed. The face in the thumbnail says science though. That's where i know you from. You're smart and funny👏

[@Dookieman1975]

Bruh this isn’t even a skit, this is the whole mythology summarized

[@RayMak]

Zeus was...

[@angiefan2481]

"You're the god of the sea" 🤣

[@FaeTheMf]

If all gods were Zeus. Also I’m getting deja vu😂😂😂

[@halvsketchy9293]

Was so sure we'd get an add for credit cards or hotel trivago, you threw us off good there

[@bjskete5717]

Love the faces after the house reveals 🤣🤣

[@rosalynredwood4542]

'you should have called the contractor ' woooo BURRRRNNN even without a thunderbolt

[@RedactedcommentMan]

>if the greek gods were f**k bois >If Lol, lmao.

[@benja_mint]

i love how confused the human must be by the train and kaboose references but he just rolls with it

[@Strafprozessordnung]

The gym community would like to give a speech

[@johannord4778]

The only olympian that can`t be called that is Aphrodite since it is literally her sphere

[@Khofax]

So no one is going to acknowledge that Poseidon knows that Hera likes girth and she’s his SISTER

[@speedy01247]

You're forgetting that Zeus is his brother and Married to Hera.

[@goldencloud7527]

"an ad really?" "No, more of a *favor*"

[@BakerBones]

this sketch works so much because the greek gods actually were f boys

[@ed--209]

this is without cap really acurate to actual mythology

[@dutchquintengamesnl4205]

love the vids dude

[@rob-ron4231]

“What the fuck is this” It never get old 😂😂

[@nicolemiller7760]

“If?”

[@wowdruidfreak2]

Was so sure it was gonna turn into a credit card ad. Honestly best ad transitions on KZbin.

[@astronxmically2817]

if zeus was the same:

[@strawhatchoz9964]

Ur the only creator whose ads (favors) i sit through bc u make them funny and enjoyable

[@bazhzebler3906]

"IF?"

[@shrankai7285]

This humor coupled with super nerdy shirts. Totally makes sense!

[@randomheadshot4291]

Sooooo greek gods but put through a modern lens??

[@tc6818]

1:53 I thought for sure this was a segue into an ad for a hotel/airline/credit card point point swapping app.

[@justinbradley4083]

Haven't even watched it yet. Just read the title. Wait, wait, wait. If? The Greek Gods are most definitely the OG fuck bois. Zeus fucks everything, Poseidon had horse sex, Ares with Aphrodite

[@PurpleFlash56]

This had me in hysterics, great video!!!

[@rxjtc]

Think these skits are written around the sponsors.

[@shirshobanerjee7751]

I like how Poseidon was more upset about the lack of a door, rather than the lack of a roof. (Yeah I know it’s a newer photo, but I don’t care)

[@blank-tw4db]

IF?!?

[@Saiko_Drums]

your videos cannot get any funnier 😂 this channel is a gem

[@cron1807]

"If"

[@zman4002]

I literally saw this title and was like "they were though.."

[@omerlavie2816]

But they were

[@missarose6159]

As a Greek mythology nerd, this is fantastic

[@krishparwani2039]

What do u mean if?

[@darthyeetus6728]

"There's no hot tub" *gasp* Hahaha

[@psgamer-il2pt]

If?

[@ArchonLicht]

"Poseidon knows how to get things wet" - ROFL

[@adammarshallyt]

Wwwwwow amazin

[@El_Dissident]

Very informative lore video

[@dontlookatthis]

This is actually how they behave in the mythology

[@Smarty7752]

I really thought the credit card bit was sitting up an ad lol. I got jebaited

[@docinsugarland]

Please more F*&% boys and Villains videos!!! You ROCK!!!

[@AgentAnime95]

Zach, did you not do your research before making this video?? Cause all of the greek gods where literally F boys.

[@db8365]

Convenient that the sponsor describes the creator

[@elysahatestostudy9364]

What do you mean "if"