Im A Fussy Eater

Im A Fussy Eater

[@smittykins]

"How do you know you don't like if you've never even tried it?" "It came to me in a dream!"

[@iverkjellkken6569]

smittykins I'll teach my kids to say that to my future wife

[@rockysandman5489]

@@iverkjellkken6569 Madlad. 😂

[@keithkeefer9954]

Trust your gut! Common sense just isn’t that common

[@TMF979Resurge]

@@keithkeefer9954 Food's food unless it's Puke Fruit or rotten

[@somegirl558]

Lol.

[@RSidd]

Only Carlin could name an entire list of foods and make you crackle with laughter. Miss ya, big guy!

[@kristinadk]

Lol, he was absolutely amazing

[@HariSeldon913]

He has other routines with a couple foods not mentioned in this one - Rice Crispies and Beer Nuts.

[@chadrobert4375]

The man opened my eyes when I was in college to how the world really works

[@robertoliva4724]

9o9

[@corolla3947]

Hahah head cheese

[@cornhusker221]

"It's rat's asshole Don!" Still cracks me up after all these years

[@Capcoor]

I heard the Air Force actually has decent food.

[@SingleTax]

"I don't like that, ma. Don't look right to me. Did you make that? Is there a picture of it in the cookbook? I'll bet it don't look like that."

[@Trainfan1055Janathan]

My parents would slap me if I said that.

[@madbear3512]

@@Trainfan1055Janathan I bet you still say it just to be a smart ass

[@bobdavis4848]

"You like it? YOU eat it!"

[@miguelarias5000]

My parents weren't white so i didn't have the white power to say that dumb shit, they'd slap me, food is food they'd say, eat it or dont.

[@AJPrice-cg5ip]

Cauliflower with runny cheese sauce has NEVER looked right.

[@NoiceRoice]

I misread the title...

[@bigrivet985]

NoiceRoice Same.

[@BodaciousCamille]

Me too!!!! lol dang bad eyesight.

[@PhantomFilmAustralia]

Theee years too late to be handing you the trophy for best internet comment of the year!

[@martinet1985]

@@MRmatt2504 yes, you are.

[@outfield243]

PUSSY

[@jannamcconnell5791]

Thank you for posting this... my Mother used to play this tape for my dad ... he was in the hospital in a coma for 4 years. He used to giggle when she did. This is tattooed in my brain and will always make me laugh.

[@hypercyclone1252]

Im sorry ur dad died, anyway I can see why

[@johnconneally]

Hypercyclone125 wtf man

[@jannamcconnell5791]

@@hypercyclone1252 don't be a dick.... aorry you can't help yourself and be a fuckin idiot. Hope you never have to experience that... have a nice life and look both ways before stepping off the curb.... asshat.

[@katyungodly]

Janna McConnell they gave condolences, how were they being a dick 😥

[@user-mb9pi5zs3t]

I think the guy meant that he can see why your dad laughed, is what I'm gathering. Please do calm down and try not to be so hostile to people who only trying to offer condolences.

[@ca441970]

I miss George carlin.... Best comedian ever

[@lesleyseville9458]

Has he retired?

[@mullenenterprises]

Lesley Seville uhhhhh sure why not

[@romelos222]

Lesley Seville he is dead

[@thomasvanwely]

@@romelos222 He's not dead. He passed away.

[@MLBlue30]

@@thomasvanwely Ah, soft language.

[@kael2450]

"Ladies and Gentleman the garbanzo's"

[@twobirdsflipping3217]

Carlin at Carnagie 1982 New York sold out concert. Hard to believe he recovered from a heart attack earlier that year. This is one of his best, I remember it well. This was from a time when the phone hung from the kitchen wall, cassette tapes played music, vcr s were state of the art and you only had 4 channels on the tv unless you got that new fangled cable stuff with that Mtv and HBO.😆

[@roberthill799]

Ha! It was also perhaps the last time I encountered the word, “newfangled”. I love that word!

[@88omair]

He was born to be on stage. He just owns it.

[@agnomymous]

“It came to me in a dream” So THIS is where that Thomas outtake came from 😂

[@kaleidoscopeeyes1184]

I lost it when he said "kumquats!"

[@tomy.1846]

1:49 You want some squash? SHIT NO!!!!!!!!! Always cracks me up!

[@brookuslicious]

One of the best things about him was the facial expressions. 🤣

[@jimmyt9345]

I know I don't like it and I know if I ate it, I'd like it even less. You like it, you eat it!

[@budgiefriend]

are you a parrot?

[@Qe2egg]

@@budgiefriend who cares if he is?

[@17Helton]

My favorite part also...."You like it? You eat it!" Life should not have to begin so damn hard.

[@Capcoor]

This is interesting, because both Mr. Carlin and myself were raised in the “eat what you’re served and shut up” generation. More specifically, the “either you eat what’s on the table or you don’t eat” generation.

[@averycamden4730]

Same here and I have a fantastic pallet as a result the onky thing I didnt like and was forced to eat that I still dont like is arugula .... Vile weed

[@incanada83]

Capcoor, you got that right LOL. Ate headcheese, blood sausage, cow's tongue, and some other crap until I grew up and found out what those were. Yuck! Never again LOL

[@thomaswolfgang81]

@@incanada83 I still like blood sausage and am 38.

[@shortandresourceful6242]

@Debra Meyers you poor thing

[@MLBlue30]

Thank God those days are over. I'm gonna throw some perfectly good food in the trash.

[@deathislife3545]

Being a fussy picky eater saved my life once from being poisoned.

[@Mii.2.0]

And yet your name tells a different story entirely... "DEATH IS LIFE"

[@touraneindanke]

And it prevents you from having a nice meal with others ofcourse

[@MEugeneDavis]

Did someone die from the same food?

[@leeroy14r60]

How do u know poison is bad u haven't even tried it?

[@bonzo319]

And everyone clapped

[@BionicSpaceAce]

You like it? You eat it!

[@aaronbishop3842]

I miss him so much..no other philosopher..comedian even comes close...its all still relevant now. Maybe more than ever

[@rmichaelj8408]

So true, environmental stuff is exact on the money, George we need you now more than ever. The jesters in ancient times could make fun of kings to keep them real ...

[@godisbollocks]

"That's rat's asshole, Don." Lmao

[@Zebra_3]

I'm sure Don will keep eating if it's spicy.

[@sylviastreet6785]

That’s how I feel about tomatoes. Because of the slime!

[@nancystowell4877]

Someone actually cross-bred tomatoes and developed one that was like a Green Pepper, cut off the top and the seeds all came out with it, the tomato was hollow, he said he did it because his wife always complained about cleaning out the insides and throwing it away so she could stuff it with Chicken Salad or Egg Salad. Saw them for a couple of years and then they were gone and now when I look for them or ask about them everyone says I'm nuts, that they never existed! Damn, Wish I'd kept the seeds!

[@kwaktak]

Pre-cynical Carlin was my favorite but there’s no way I’m showing this to my kids until they’re grown! I need all the bargaining power I can get and if they know I find this funny they will starve!😂

[@Raven7400]

That's if the world doesn't burn before your kids hit puberty. Might as well show them the latest videos so they'll grow up to be critical thinkers. Unless you're one of those parents that had a kid just for a slave.

[@Srilankanenglishteacher]

@@Raven7400 come on man, don't be tarded.

[@RedNightDragon1]

I was 13 when I saw this in '82/'83. It was my introduction to GC. Made me a fan of his for life!

[@racheln8563]

“It came to me in a dream!” I swear, I wish I had said that when my parents tried to corner me with the same argument. It would have been worth any punishment they dished out. The answer I came up with, albeit years too late, was “I’ve never eaten a dog turd, either, but I have a pretty good idea I wouldn’t like the taste!”

[@juliemolthop8980]

SUCH BRILLIANCE!! RIP and KNOW that WE MISS YOU SO!!

[@dreamwareinc.3071]

why was george a little cuban kid when he was fussing? 😂😂😂

[@junaid8608]

'I know it's not the end of an egg, but a beginning of a chicken'

[@negascoot23]

Been seeing comments from folks who grew up in the *"That's What We're Having, Eat It Or Starve"* generation (which was oddly also Carlin's generation). I was raised right AFTER that generation: Parents weren't coddling "fussy eaters" the way I've seen people my age with kids...but there was a little room for "negotiation"☺️ There were only 2 kids in my family: me and my brother. My brother was the "fussy eater". There was a freaking list of things he wouldn't eat for various subjective reasons--not even reasons as good as Carlin's. But my folks found ways to "work around" his fussiness without starving him or capitulating: He wouldn't eat spaghetti with sauce (or anything tomato based, really). Fine. He had plain spaghetti with butter and parmesan. But no way in HELL were they going to make a second main course to accommodate him. Me? I was the guy in the chow line eating rat asshole fondue--I'd eat ANYTHING 😂😂😂😂 I *liked* the idea of eating something I'd never tried or never heard of...and if it looked weird or gross, if most people wouldn't eat it just because of what it was made from--BRING IT ON!😋 I hated, and still hate disliking foods--I consider it a waste 😔 I still try things I *know* I won't like, just to see if somehow this particular cook figured out how to make it in a way I liked... ...it actually works sometimes😉

[@kenhollis6197]

Now we have commercials for Kraft macaroni and cheese with smartass kids being given the mac and cheese when they won't eat their dinner.

[@negascoot23]

@@kenhollis6197 For a while a few years back there was this commercial for a protein shake: Either Ensure or Boost I think. Anyway, it showed this mom grocery shopping with her kid--and the kid loudly and obnoxiously explaining how much she hated every single item her mother put in the shopping cart. Instead of laying down the law, this mother just lamented about how she worried for her ungrateful brat's health: since apparently, this kid won't eat *anything* The shake advertised was presented as a solution: a way to make sure kids who refuse to eat don't die of malnutrition. Lovely. Your children defy you--refuse the food you worked your ass off to pay for...and not one or two items, but everything you buy, for no reason whatsoever... ...and what do you do? Why, reward them with yummy chocolate shakes of course! I think the makers of this product realized the message they were sending (or they received some rather irate phone calls), because this campaign didn't last long😂 Hopefully, somebody in marketing got their ass fired😁

[@brianstratton8767]

Well..( tiny sigh) I once was the little brother who wouldn't eat ' dirty spaghetti' but butter n parm=yum! Now I put a liberal amount of crushed red on it & like it w/hot Italian sausage too! On to Marketing..highly possible same agency that pitched Boost shakes did a more recent spot for Home Depot where kid's spilling bowl of cereal while being dragged upstairs by muddy dog. Fear not folks cuz HD install$ new carpet! All for now..

[@roberthill799]

“Think about the poor children starving in India”, I was told nearly 60 years ago when I wouldn’t eat my overdone Brussels Sprouts. “Then send this to them and see if they eat it!”, was my response. Do I need to add that sitting down was not a comfortable option a few minutes after saying this?

[@TymphaRedbreaduwuowo]

god dammit i spit my coffee on my keyboard lmfao *yoooooguuurrtt* sound like its coming back up again

[@4u1004me]

if you spit your coffee on the keyboard how did you type?

[@raprot7829]

@@4u1004me Yeedeedeedee...

[@dewalt4594]

YoU are so full of crap !!!!

[@denisepleines1513]

My favorite part

[@atlantic_love]

@@4u1004me It was the meme of the day. Nowadays those dorks say "I can't even..." or "I just died". Nothing original.

[@PtlRG1]

How can 12 people not like George? WTF? He is a comic icon.

[@alexksksepko1524]

The numbers switched. 21 now.

[@timothyball742]

April 6, 2019 the count is 49.

[@Scrotchkins]

People like different things?! Who knew...

[@funnybonesbucknewton7261]

There fussy viewers

[@timothyball742]

@@funnybonesbucknewton7261 Or it just might be that what level of brains they had/have are not in use. George is a rare gift, and to those who aren't present in the here and now, [this goes for the time Carlin was live, and to them who can listen], have too much trouble getting his humor/smarts! It is there loss and our gain.

[@WolfkinNorthclaw]

Squash, guacamole, kumquats, all good eating.

[@nicolesmusicreviews1889]

"Lever beans and pork." God, I love auto-generated captions.

[@olrikm]

What a friggin' genius!

[@deanchristensen4783]

My younger sister, a fussy eater herself, used the "It came to me in a dream" excuse when mom would make something she didn't want to eat.

[@extraterrestrial16]

its really quite amazing.. that he actually seems to somehow bring the foods to life..damn it was good acting in a slap stick kind of way..

[@mrnewton86]

Headcheese sounds like the kinda thing one may cough up when they have a nasty cold, or if they're a smoker.

[@nancystowell4877]

Looks like it too! Just gross!

[@SalWare686]

Lung butter 😋

[@MrDeathyness]

I am a reforming fussy eater, and I was a big pain in the ass. Now I cook myself and others, and I always think of this bit when I’m working in a kitchen

[@RA-lm2id]

Sounds like cannibalism, but good for you.

[@precociousone2003]

@@RA-lm2id yes, my sentiments exactly... I don't want to *see* ANYONE cooking themselves or other people... *THANKYOU* thank you VERY MUCH!

[@kitcat3579]

I'm sure your delicious , your friends could use a little salt though

[@anonymike8280]

Not saying I was sorry saved me once from onion poisoning.

[@emersonr8971]

He sounds like Al Pacino when he does the child voice

[@hipwave]

the great old man should've tried black pudding and haggis.

[@HEAVYMETALmovie1981]

*"NO, GET IT OFF MY PLATE!* XD

[@DinsdalePiranha67]

The world is a much worse place for George Carlin's absence. With the state we're in right now, he'd have a field day.

[@deaniewienie8382]

It’s amazing how much a title can change with one line in the F

[@bmaiceman]

WTF DO THEY DO WITH THE REST OF THE FROG'S????

[@jbrown577]

One of the greatest comedians ever.

[@skippermeak7995]

My mom used to cook scalloped potatoes and with a 100% rate she used to burn them on one side, so they were inedible. But as a little kid she forced me to eat them. So, whenever she announced that we were having these scalloped potatoes again, I actually felt my hair stand on end!

[@Nick_C1997]

I have the same reaction when my mum says she’s cooking hot dogs

[@CoasterMan13Official]

Luckily, my mom can cook.

[@negakirine]

No wonder he was so thin. :)

[@joshjosh9010]

Well, cocaine will do that to you, too.

[@martinet1985]

thin? he was fucking normal size. perhaps you are just big?

[@jessiehermit9503]

@@psychoticbob Some alcoholics are fat. It wasn't the alcohol. 🍸

[@RUS38]

Lots of tea and coffee also makes you loose a lot of weight if of course you drink just them and not munch on some sweet snacks like most people do. And btw less food and portion control makes you smarter because brain works when stomach is at rest and when stomach is full all the energy flows down for digestion. That's why people who eat a lot and 3 times a day are always dumber. ALWAYS! You will never make your brain work at more than 3% of it's full potential by eating 3 times a day your regular diet that 99.9% of people on the planet eat.

[@anthonysonnheim5725]

It's called COCAINE!

[@HalloweeNut13]

"Look at the big bug! Step on the big bug!... before he gets to the children..."

[@tootallzz]

One of the funniest men that lived during my lifetime......George knew how to keep it real and question everything in life.❤️💔😆😆

[@aurorafrost288]

I always imagined Mel Brooks picturing George when he coined the term stand up philosopher.

[@A_Dopamine_Molecule]

Dammit, everyone's already made the joke about the title...

[@johnsonmonkeman5766]

Somehow got 30 likes, kinda feel bad because it's a dead joke

[@djquinn11]

George never laughed at his own jokes, he literally invented this style of stand up

[@tomasbleho1775]

one of the best , a natural !

[@greengiant9739]

I hope he's smoking a joint sipping on some scotch and a cold beer laughing up a storm with Dave Allen ... Among other greats of the like... Miss them all big time.....

[@jeffclement2468]

And Mitch Hedberg, and Bill Hicks 😻

[@issabeganovic8822]

You realise that "I hope he's in heaven" pondering is the kind of crap he hates, right?

[@djdelugach2402]

George Carlin and Richard Pryor....The 2 most insightful and legendary comics I will ever have had the pleasure to have followed throughout their careers...RIP to both of them. The tears of laughter I have spilled watching these two giants could fill a swimming pool...If there was a Mt Rushmore for comedians, you know George and Richard would be front and center...

[@demonitecallisto]

lol Carlin is my favorite comic he is down to the point

[@albertelnen4995]

My grandma would just say. Mania. You like what you like. He didn't mention the food I hate most. Liver. Shoe leather.

[@LBCB94025]

"The flying garbanzos!" Lol 😆👍🏻

[@emreeves3421]

A comedian that will always be remembered!

[@jinhan5129]

Oh George, how I miss you

[@rebeccataylor7469]

Love George carlin

[@TheAlison1456]

Look at the big bug, step on the big bug! The cookie bit was also good.

[@cierakitty]

I agree with him on the ...If I can't identify what it is...I'm not going to eat it.

[@nothingforgrantedPS23]

2:04 "Want soms succotash?" "What'd you call me you fuk?! Whoa, hey, look out!" 😂😂 Freaking legend.

[@patriottroll1764]

Succotash does sound like an insult! 😁 2:00

[@silvertarot25]

Suck a Tash....what is a tash?

[@patriottroll1764]

What did you call me you fuck?

[@thenerdwholovesentertainme1721]

@@patriottroll1764 hey hey fricking cool out man it's just Lima beans and corn. Cool out cool out.

[@_MrOcean]

Sounds like a punch toward a hairy upper lip when the guy wasn't lookin.

[@HariSeldon913]

@@patriottroll1764 Sylvester the cat (Sylvester and Tweety) used to use 'sufferin succotash' as a substitute for swearing.

[@Alekth85]

Squash... - You want some SQUASH ?!?!? - SHIT NO !!!!!! this bit right here, is better than anybody ever did in history of stand up comedy.

[@MrsJasmyn45]

"you make this, is there a picture of this in the cookbook? I bet it doesn't look like that

[@martinet1985]

it don't *

[@draco9280]

Lol yeah I’m about 95% accurate when it comes to knowing that I won’t like the taste something new to me. I am pretty adventurous though.

[@powerpc127]

I just finished a shift at a restaurant where a customer ordered a crazy mess of a dish that wasn't on the menu then complained that it took a long time to come out (because of course the kitchen guys took their time making it to make sure they got it right), and I needed to hear that first line tonight.

[@RedNightDragon1]

I remember watching this entire GC special on HBO in 1982 when it was new. I was 13. My father normally wouldn't have allowed me nor my sister to be exposed to foul language, but he made an exception for George Carlin!

[@Protectobot]

WHOA! Kumquats are actually spelled 'cumquats' in Australia. I just like saying the word to gross out ppl lol. OOOOOOHH! What a guy :D

[@tangodrizzle]

Wow KZbin coming in clutch with a recommendation of a Carlin vid I havent seen!

[@trequor]

Lovin the tomato face lol

[@seeuathebeach]

I'm trying to imagine how horrible life can be for those people who give a thumb down to George Carlin 🙈

[@brianlash154]

SQQUASSHHHHH... is amazing

[@sylviastreet6785]

He’s not a comedian, he’s an observer of life!

[@mikewhatever8607]

Fun food fact(pico de gallo) Was was invented on Cinco de Mayo By Rico and his Brothers Paco & Bob Who is now called taco ever since He moved to the Ritz

[@SteveStalzle]

I saw his act, in 1984--IT WAS GREAT!

[@robynkulp6946]

Great comedian!!! Thanks George!!!

[@theshaydedlotus3128]

There has never been one and there never will be one like you Carlin. For those who would say Gilbert Gottfried, he's a different kind of comedian.

[@muraddiab6393]

No one would say Gilbert Gottfried

[@atlantic_love]

@@muraddiab6393 I agree. Gilbert is A W F U L.

[@mundo19841]

" Can't eat anything with "y' and 'g'. Amazingly absurd comedy

[@timobrien8809]

I guess 1 person couldn't find a good place to open their box of cookies !!

[@SaweetTooth]

Head Cheese..... EUGHHH!

[@glenndecker1645]

It's great. Don't knock it. Very good.

[@Apemopo]

the crap quality (especially the audio) makes this even funnier somehow

[@jayluck8047]

No Y no G? Forget Gravy!

[@MrDeathyness]

Jay Luck the y has to be before the g tho

[@autumnatic]

I used to have to stop this special around 5:55 because the crab bit made me laugh so hard I couldn't breathe.

[@denisepleines1513]

The yogurt comment 😂 To this day I still can't eat (clicks tounge) "yogurt ..yo - yogurt! "it sounds like it's coming back up again!! "Yogurt!"

[@vanwin5415]

I DID play with my food, it was NOT allowed. Now at last at 70 I can mash it up, build little mountains as I please.

[@clairejohnson6522]

That sounds like fun.Just an idea but you could use broccoli to form trees,mashed potato for your mountains and you could create a reservoir which you could fill with gravy which could be the water.That's just to start with!🤣

[@Garen1]

I read the title as “fuzzy easter”

[@jonahyogman6282]

Finally. An innocent smol bean among the thousands of tainted souls.

[@mangojulie123]

@@tuffarms2716 I thought every guy and even some chicks did. LOL

[@RubyDiamond2316]

WTF is head Cheese??????? hahaha

[@RubyDiamond2316]

Ewwwwww lol

[@bluessman0925]

In the south it's known as "Hog Head Cheese" My grandmother used to make it, it's made out of the cheek, tongue, etc. of the Hog's head.. also known as "Sauce Meat"..

[@mattlsmith20]

It’s nasty. It looks like gelatin vomit.

[@cowboygym]

I can't even look at the sign...You look at it! I'll be down by the bologna....

[@proud2bpagan]

My ex said one of her grandads made some at home,and she said that one of her worst nightmares was made when she opened the fridge at his house and saw a pig's head staring out blankly at her.

[@richardkey4289]

This got me thinking of sitting down for supper once a year or so, expecting steak, & getting a huge slab of LIVER

[@gregoryggrose36]

Pryor - Carlin. Carlin-Pryor. Either one,but no one else is even close #1 & #2 ..Rank then how u want,either way is correct. I miss them

[@georgeforeman9666]

Gorge leaves Richard in the dust.

[@saulschlapik6818]

The main thing Carlin & Pryor had in common was that they both started out doing "clean" material in the 60s. Even though they were successful, they felt that they weren't being true to themselves. So they both started doing much raunchier (and funnier) material in the 70s. My impression was the transition was easier for George, his FM/AM album had both types of humor. For Richard, it took him a few years to develop a new act. In the movie Live & Smoking (I think it was around 71 or 72), he was doing the classic bits he did in the mid 70s but you could tell it was a work in progress. They were both hilarious but I think I like Pryor a little better.

[@jamessantos9861]

Carlin for the win, especially in his later years.

[@gregoryggrose36]

George Foreman come on bruh ,it’s one of 2 but it’s certainly not “leave in the dust”... that’s laughable

[@gregoryggrose36]

James Santos man his last years were the funniest and smartest shit I’ve ever seen...

[@kris242]

He’s just such a fucking genius with words. I’ve never seen a comedian deconstruct the English language and manipulate it to their own advantage quite as well as George Carlin. It’s definitely the reason why I developed such a huge fascination with the subtleties of language in the first place. ❤️

[@fokiat]

lol so i decided it was a good idea to watch this while eating dinner lol

[@meadster308]

This is from "Carlin at Carnegie Hall", his best 80's special.

[@davecrupel2817]

5:40 "ITS *HAMCUM!* AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!" im fucking dying 😂😂😂

[@makutamiserix5612]

Anyone else wondering why he's performing in front of a pile of chairs?

[@incanada83]

Makuta Miserix, the pile of chairs is the background. 0:50 is the audience :-)

[@johnsonmonkeman5766]

@@incanada83 from the audience's pov

[@incanada83]

@@johnsonmonkeman5766 LOL . On a side note.....(just me, mind you), THAT would have been last thing I'd wonder about :-)

[@jackedkerouac4414]

Maybe he was known as the “Stuff” comic at that point

[@stevecoggs5256]

When I was a kid, we had these neighbors - each and every Autumn - used to bring over their "extra" squash from out their garden. I always hated them for that :-))

[@Smokedogzz]

If there was anyone that I wished never got old and lived forever...this guy and Rodney Dangerfield, and me...would be at the top of the list!!

[@jshaw3793]

You wants some SQUASH?....SHIT NO!!!

[@bobdavis4848]

Sounds like SOMEone SAT ON DINNER!

[@Conchobar2004]

How about that banana guacamole that was stolen from you 😅

[@Mike_A1114]

It’s still in the pile

[@haydehabdolahian7691]

Gee I miss him and Robin Williams so much 😢

[@TheSaneHatter]

Why am I laughing this hard? WHY!?