Inside the hateful and lonely world of incel men | Uncovering Incels (Part 1) | Short Documentary

[@SBSTheFeed]

Watch the next episode where we look at the darker side of the incel world here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jaSQl2h4rct6pc0

[@Basedlocation]

/3 men under 30 are virgins in a society where being a male virgin is unacceptable and the pressure is on, what did u think what would happen ??

[@painunending4610]

Imagine being an incel AND living in Australia... Truly a hellish existence

[@dankmemes385]

Melbourne here I’m in that hell been in it for 41 years. Incel before the incels, hot tip your over it by 35. I don’t hate women either jhst don’t get em 😂

[@hangukhiphop]

hey at least you have legal brothels over there lol here in the US it's basically outlawed

[@bayek9869]

It’s over for Australiancels

[@tessy28]

What's special about Australia specifically?

[@Jaapst]

haha why is australia so bad?

[@racqueldillon3560]

Wanting sex is a normal.human feeling. But basing your entire identity and level of happiness based on having or not having it is alarming.

[@eileengerding942]

That's what I never understand. How is sex so important in your life?? Get a hobby or something lol

[@disagiato9391]

Bro It Is not about sex. Just be want/loved by someone

[@ghevisartor6005]

no you literally do not understand. It's just not getting sex or a relationship now, it's not even having the hope to get in in the future at any point. Of course you talk like this because you never found your self in such scenario.

[@liljay300000]

if you actually get into it. It's not about the sex in reality. Even with one of the incels that they showed. He was capable of having sex but he found that not to be enough.

[@DTreatz]

easy to say as a female who never has to prove their worth to society. Fact of the matter is it's not that alarming because sex and reproduction is a cornerstone of -human- _animal_ existence. This is an existential crisis society is facing, and if it keeps being intellectually dishonest, then it's going to collapse. Just enjoy the decline I guess.

[@danpartridge8584]

This is just depressing. I'm 33 and haven't dated/been romantically involved with anyone since college. I've spent my time building up my career and focusing inward. I own my own home/vehicle, have two dogs I adore, money in the bank, and I enjoy my solitude immensely. I wish these younger dudes could become self-reliant and enjoy themselves more in place of such self-hated. I am my own biggest fan and advocate -- I wholeheartedly believe that has been the key to my success and my happiness.

[@sajtospog9888]

"Women may not have ever been attracted to me but at least I am not an incel" Yes, you are. If a woman was never attracted to you, you are an incel

[@Jay-tj7sn]

i’m so proud of you. Seriously. Thank you.

[@aa-up4sf]

You're my man. I joined the army to find my worth. But your way works too. Keep on trucking brother 💪

[@darkking9836]

There are 2 types of incels- 1. Entitled pricks who are angry and hateful towards women for not sleeping with them. These are the ones with violent tendencies. 2. Socially awkward/ lonely men, often conventionally unattractive looking who have lost hope and feel like they should give up. About 8/10 would fall into that second group, but unfortunately the first group is what many people think all incels are like.

[@MakinItHappenn]

Do you really think that the Entitled group are not conventionally unattractive too? HA HA HA. Of course. That doesn't sound as poetic, does it?

[@adishadzo9896]

Raymond literally said "if I don't find a girlfriend until 35, I will find a job". 😂 That's not how it works.

[@koshka02]

people may not want to admit it, but online dating apps have actually been detrimental to Men's mental health I really think dating apps have been horrible for society If you found your spouse/significant other through a dating app, then I am happy for you, but the vast majority of people are miserable having to use it

[@theironson1043]

online dating apps should be banned.

[@sally180]

I am a woman that feels that dating apps and social media are largely responsible for the loneliness and lack of connection in society today. I hope people start waking up, turning off the screen and actually embracing the real world again

[@hem2821]

What I find a shame is that they define their lives by their inability to be with another person. Relying on another in order to specify significance as a person is damaging and scary

[@Commander-qw2ld]

How is it ? What is our purpose as humans ? It is to reproduce with the opposite sex . That’s our main goal . And when your not fulfilling your goal …when your rejected by society ….that’s how people like these incels come about

[@ghevisartor6005]

lol most people date and are fine, they even get fulfilled by relationships. What are you even talking about? 😂

[@kalistothenes]

That's what society wants from men

[@user-qu6xp3jq4c]

No one should define themselves by a relationship or marriage! Goodness me!

[@nateblance2936]

It seems it's driven by their family. Their parents don't understand this generation and online dating. They don't understand how much of a job interview it has become. The parents label them as losers, then the incels respond by deviation from a society that rejected them.

[@cheycheyliddi]

Being referred to as “female” is so unsettling like we aren’t human

[@WCHvids]

Wow what a female thing to say

[@mirandaw.4944]

i know right, nobody ever calls them males

[@RareJewel777]

There is a difference between women and females, but I get your point

[@rano12321]

humans can't be female?

[@Simone-xe9cw]

I've lived dating pre and post the "dating app era", and I can say without a doubt that dating today feels more like a job interview than a moment of knowledge.

[@imskar3441]

Don’t think it’s hard to talk to a woman, but coming off weird or awkward makes any interaction harder if your already “ugly.” Most women can sense that there’s something off.

[@kaiju9149]

If you're ugly don't bother. You don't have a chance anyways.

[@ceooflonelinessinc.267]

I am Incel too. At least by definition. In 33 years of my life I never experienced any kind of romantic contact. I never had a hug, a date or a kiss and obviously no realationship. Getting chronically rejected and therefore living years or decades without any kind of romantic contact is something I wish not my worst enemies. It makes you mentally sick. It has totally brokek me. I am suffering from clinical depressionen, panic attacks and other mental issues due to that.

[@mickeydeee]

I'm really sorry you've had to go through this. Every human is deserving of love and you are no exception.

[@ilyrain3540]

We got this brocel. There's no ideology behind incels that's just the mainstream propaganda.

[@stoicblade1079]

Here's the thing...you've got have thick skin. I remember reading a phrase years ago that has always helped me: "One woman, One vote" ...meaning, if 1 girl or 20 girls reject me...that is strictly their opinion. They do not define me or the opinions of the other billions of girls out there. Plus, I talk to EVERYBODY. You focus on yourself, stop caring so much what others think about you, and flirt with EVERYBODY. It's a numbers game.

[@ellaverte2333]

I have cptsd from men with all the same symptoms, mine were from two freak grapists and stalkers, but go to therapy,there is cbt and such that will help, I trust men again and am married to an amazing guy. You blaming all women for your problems would be like me saying every single male is a grapist, alot are but alot arnt .

[@JamFlava1]

You need to socialize with people, going out and talk to woman more and boost your conversation skills and trust me you will get more confidence. Staying at home won’t get you a girlfriend my friend. Go to the club, cafeteria and talk to woman. It doesn’t matter if you get rejected or not, just talk and talk it will boost your confidence, eventually you will get a girlfriend.

[@Booth81]

I was an incel before the term even existed. I was mercilessly bullied from elementary until High School, and i made what I thought were a circle of friends in college. It turned out that one of the girls in said circle thought I was stalking her, and they were making fun of me behind my back. I became a recluse, and lost trust in people outside of my family for a long time. I’m 43 years old, autistic (not diagnosed until I was 28), and a recovering alcoholic who used to drink alone. However, I’ve not only sobered up, but I finally got out of retail a while back, and found a much better paying job. One where I’ve made some real friends among my coworkers. I’ve still never been in a relationship, but I don’t care about that anymore. If it happens, great. If not, it’s not a problem. In my 20s, though, I was enraged over it. I wasted so much time arguing with people on the internet, to the point where it got me banned from my favorite forum at the time. I never said any of the garbage I’ve seen in this video, but I was so blinded by my anger, that i didn’t realize how I was coming off. No one wants to talk to someone who’s that big of an asshole. I don’t condone any of the vile, sexist, or racist BS that I’ve seen on these Incel forums. Those posts make me even more angry than the kids who bullied me. Those idiots overshadow the rest of us, who are simply reaching out for understanding and compassion, in a world they feel has left them behind. I just hope these young men find satisfaction in life a little sooner than I did.

[@hildis33]

i know a lot of women who havent had romantic / sexual relationships with men, and still they blame themselves not men for their situation, it's crazy to think women are the root cause of your problems, especially at such a young age, while being sad and depressed for not being a relationship is not new for any gender. the violent thoughts they have is genuinely scary

[@futurereflections4097]

There is no such thing as a female incel

[@assia4595]

soo true

[@sana.4.a]

women tend to blame themselves more than others for their celibacy

[@luigisantoriello3289]

What you said is true,let me just say one thing: Lonely men are genuinely lonely as no woman wants them/finds them interesting. Lonely women are women who choose to be alone because all the men that like them are seen as not interesting/attracting enough.

[@GG-mx9fj]

Men don’t publicly reject women as women rarely make the advance. These boys would likely have been benefited several times by women for being awkward then they would harbour unhealthy emotions or want for revenge. An unhealthy or odd mother to son relationship can also cause repressed anger Therapy would help a lot but it’s rarely accesible to people who need it the most

[@mylesbailey6506]

Male 29 years old. I have been rejected, flaked on and ghosted by every woman I have ever liked my entire life.

[@iLilith11]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@muffinsinthechair4501]

Did u asked them why?

[@manosijroy8282]

I am in the same boat as you but I am a 22 year old guy who never had a girlfriend before and its definitely bothering me. I got rejected by 4 girls recently. I asked out my childhood friend 2 months ago and she is 21 now turning 22 soon but she isn't that active on Instagram so she took a month to reply to it but she agreed to meet up and again didn't reply for over a month about when we can meet up. I have been chatting with another girl on Instagram since 28th May 2023. She is 19 now and she used to be in the same school as me but we didn't know each other in school days and now we are in different colleges but her college is very near to my home. We chat daily and she shares everything to me and I do the same too and we even send each other virtual hugs but there is still no flirting yet. It looks like she still sees me as a friend. I wanna ask her out but I am nervous especially after getting rejected 4 times recently. Is 1 month long enough to know whether she is interested in me or not?

[@SirSmokeAlot8866]

Imagine not talking to a girl outside your family for 3 years and then you gotta talk to a girl on camera 😳

[@guillermoelnino]

Attacking the most defenseless and isolated people in society. Because that's what good guys do.

[@xelaklement3367]

The problem is that these boys/men could probably get a girl but the constant rejection has made them insecure and most of all bitter. A man who is bitter is an absolute turn off and we can sense it from miles away. I am not putting the fault on anyone except the superficial society we live in, it is a vicious circle really.

[@johnmilius3031]

Incel is a state of being, literally a portmanteau of the words "Involuntarily" and "Celibate". It's not a philosophy in itself, such as the blue-, red- or blackpill.

[@jaylucas8352]

It starts with a condition, leads to an identity , and culminates in a philosophy oftentimes.

[@rangapal7949]

I love how they only pick the weirdest dudes to make incels look like violent misogynists when literally the average man is an incel. Like literally every dude you know is probably an incel.

[@jayhughes3843]

They should've had men interview the incels...

[@mephistopheles9644]

most people in the comments who complain about this wouldn't care if you disappeared forever. never take advice from people who don't care about you.

[@krishyket]

Usually, these guys have gone through something extremely traumatic or negative during school which have destroyed their worldview. I feel sorry for them. The current dating game and scene doesnt help either.

[@TiktokBro154]

True

[@stoicblade1079]

I blame social media and online porn. Studies show that that shit does a real number on a young mind.

[@MrRAGE22]

It’s a very dark slippery slope

[@collaborativedataaccounts3249]

These times are unreasonable, but they're still spastic.

[@VoldraLightningfrost]

Thank you. The empathy shows, and helps.

[@Basedlocation]

1/3 men under 30 are virgins in a society where being a male virgin is unacceptable and the pressure is on, what did u think what would happen ??

[@shamzo1798]

Women are sIut shamed while men a virgin shamed. It's just what it is

[@norbertbraun2917]

I am in the same situation. In 33 years of my life I never experienced any kind of romantic contact. I never had a hug, a date or a kiss and obviously no realationship. Though I tired everything I can like asking women out, approaching them or using dating apps. Like Raymond I also tried to improve in the best way i can. I do sports, I have interests like playing Ukulel and over the years I went out on some adventures to get out of the comfort zone. But nothing worked. Not one single women ever considered me for nothing less than a date - and obviously anything beyond that. It totally destroyed me mentally. I dont know what to do anymore.

[@aosleosbus6737]

I really hope the best for Raymond, he seems like a genuinely nice person, it’s easier said then done but I don’t think a relationship is completely impossible for him, he doesn’t have the disgusting and aggressive mindset of violence that will also turn women away. I just think maybe if he seeks a therapist or a life coach to help his social anxiety and skills to be able to comfortably speak to women more would help. Like I don’t see him as unattractive, like he’s your average guy as most people are. I feel with media you see all these beautiful people so much more that it kinda destroys your perspective of the world that the average person doesn’t have the crystal clear skin etc. and it’s harder to see the human in them through the screen because a lot of it so much more fake.

[@carla9368]

The "hello female" when she arrived killed me

[@koshka02]

1. unemployed 2. mental health issue 3 . insecure about their looks yes, I have 2 out of 3 of these problems, and I would 100% say that is the reason why. It stems from 1 or 2 of those 3 things.

[@Stinkmeaner420]

Definitely the first 2 tbh

[@whajwjwbqksisjdbeskoshewkdy]

all of those 3 it stem from genetics/looks

[@user-sf5iq2fl1l]

Well. I own house car, employed and go to gym. Am a bit insecure about my looks, but hey, nobody is perfect. Still get no gf.

[@bro918]

Looks/height is 90%. Chad doesnt need a job. Chad can be an anxious, manipulative trainwreck but it doesnt matter.

[@natefnbr8494]

Hate to say it but i almost cant even be mad at an incel, alot of how the world views you is how you look and how people perceive you, and if someones born with physically unnatractive genes i dont know how it could be possible to be confident around woman. Because woman 100% treat you differently as a man depending on how you look. Seen it 1000 times. Its a messed up reality. None of the woman hating is right, but the looks theory is plainly obvious.

[@iLilith11]

I agree. I never dated an ugly guy. It's just *not* natural

[@shortersview]

Hmmm I wonder why more women aren’t incels? Women have been getting judge on their looks since the dawn of time. Why aren’t more women incels. We get rejected abused, raped, objectified, belittled and ignored. And that’s not just the girls y’all deem unattractive. Women should be the one in the chat rooms but yet white fragil men want to kill women for not wanting to be with them bc they think it’s ok to kill a woman for not being with him.

[@SusanChristmas]

As a woman may I say that women can grow to love a man they do not find to be the most attractive. Confidence, personal success and the respect from others around them can change how a man is viewed. Also as a women ages their priorities change they start to look for a provider and a protector someone trustworthy and honest who makes them feel special.Looks fade but these other assets can last a lifetime.

[@Mau365PP]

These are lonely men and they treat them like terrorists 😂

[@lovejunkie490]

When you kill someone, or support someone that kill someone, you ARE a terrorist

[@MarcusHalberstramVP]

I am 27 and I am a virgin because I guess I am pretty ugly - every girl I ever asked out immediately rejected me on the basis of my appearance and height (171cm). At this point, I have forced myself to no longer care about attractive girls - when I pass by one, I just pretend they don’t exist. Sometimes, I still get mad when I hear about the wild successes of some of my attractive friends - they date a different girl each week. There is a stark contrast in our lives. On the positive side, I have secured a stellar investment banking job in which I already make $500k net per annum. So, it’s not all doom & gloom:)

[@kellywilliamson2187]

As a young man, the sexual compulsion is incredibly powerful and it seems like everyone is having sex . . . except you - but, of course, it's an illusion and in large part due to relentless marketing centered around sexual attraction.

[@Irakli008]

Props to the researchers. You approached this with a lot of curiosity and empathy. It would have been so easy to impulsively react to and argue about some of the things they said, but it’s great that you gave them the space to express themselves and their worldview. It’s so sad to see young men like this.

[@tessy28]

I don't feel sympathy for them at all. Act stupid and ridiculous and hateful towards women and then get surprised when women sense your awfulness and run for the hills. I wouldn't touch people like this with a barge pole. Their hatred is an illness. Very very sick individuals

[@dawd21]

i wish all were like this so we could throw this perverted idea of "freedom" and female led societies

[@coimbralaw]

Awww so saaaad

[@banks3388]

This dude isn't an incel, the mask gives it away i.e. the mask is associated with fringe left-wing elements and incels are almost exclusively crypto-fascists who click with forum culture.

[@OccidentalAryan]

@@tessy28 The vast majority are not hateful. Why are you painting 100s of millions of men with the same brush?

[@huggybear539]

I guess I'm an INCEL. I faced a lot of abuse as a child and caused me to become extremely introverted. Add that to a 5' 7" frame and you have a recipe for a lonely life. It bothered me a lot in my teens and twenties, but realized I need to embrace my solitude instead of hating the world or I, myself, would go crazy. It's a "dog eat dog world" and we are witnessing the survival of the fittest.

[@philshen1899]

Social medias instant gratification has ruined relationships completely

[@Vanessa-gp18tk]

Why do they hate ALL women when there are so many women who are in the same situation as them in life and struggle with the same issues?

[@mikioni]

chad = aww he is so cute ugly man = eww he is a misogynist

[@The_Lovey_Informer]

I learned in my 23 years of life, that you cant force things to happen. If you aren't chosen. Give up and find other things in life to focus on. Chad and Tyrones are always gonna win.

[@muhammadhuzaifahmohamedsal2697]

amen

[@tessy28]

Your first tip. Stop referring to people as Chads, Tyrone and Stacey's

[@mikehvh1337]

truly over

[@dannyboy3413]

Most men are brainwashed by the media and internet to put pussy on a pedestal and to think like having sex and getting laid is the sole purpose in life. Men must find their own way through this life with his own judgements, not by some autistic "pill" ideology. Internet and social media is brainwashing men.

[@SubliminalSociety]

Facts. I’m not going to be the beta waiting for her during her 30s

[@SynthhInHD]

I'm an incel by definition, not really by views. It's been almost 6 years since I had any romantic contact with a woman, and it's not for lack of trying. I'm tall, I've got many interests, I have a good job, and I'm educated, but still I struggle. Dating apps don't work for me and I've got so much trauma from growing up as an outcast that I probably won't ever feel comfortable enough to put myself out there. It doesn't help seeing so many women talking about their impossible standards for men.

[@AbuBased731]

>[indenialÇel]

[@liilykh4n]

Womens standards are literally just a funny gentleman that treats them with respect, ive seen maybe a small amount of guys however that don’t hyperfixate on a woman’s physical appearance

[@TimSlee1]

I don't hate women, i'm just confused, lonely and a little envious of people who have it all figured out.

[@OccidentalAryan]

There's nothing to figure out. It's all looks.

[@LORWBITCH]

I hate

[@taquito7526]

Have it all figured out is short for have all the looks

[@biteofdog]

The thing to realize is that nobody has it all figured out, and we all have our different struggles. Some folks are great at hiding their problems until you talk to them, their lives may seem perfect, but they could still feel unhappy or unfulfilled.

[@midnull6009]

This is what desperate loneliness looks like...

[@pjmlemon3280]

shoutout to these girls who put themselves into uncomfortable situations…

[@martynilsson4731]

The Internet is slowly killing our society.

[@imconfusion4976]

I’m certainly NOT an incel in any form! but it’s hard not to sympathise with these people some what, as a guy myself, dating is stupidly hard nowadays for men, and its hard not to feel down sometimes from the lack of attention, so I feel sorry for them on that matter.

[@jebril]

Yea I've only been with one girl my wife and she's fat AF. Apparently I'm good looking, but objectively I have an 8 in dick, 6 ft tall pretty much (5'11) make six figures own multiple homes and cars outright. I've been with my wife for like 12 yrs tho but like I just see how it is trying to get a threesome going, like impossible wtf man.

[@zumazuma568]

You're saying it like it's easy for women...

[@BigTylt]

It's one thing to feel demoralized and exhausted, and it's something entirely different to cheer on violence against women out of a desire for comeuppance.

[@stephanieodiase]

Boo hooo 😂😂😂😂

[@zain7alyani7906]

If these are what male incels are.. What are females with misandrist believes and standards? Is it really viewed the same way when males are sexualized by women? Why are those females called feminist and are seen as fighting for there right and worth meanwhile these men are called incels and seen as failures when it’s actually society that has failed them and made them felt like the only way they have a value in life is by interacting with females? Is this really the dark side of themselves or reality of the dark side society offers to men?

[@Jotinko]

I was so close to becoming an incel. I was never a misogynist as my hatred was aimed at myself. I too am autistic (mild case) but for 20 years (since 7th/8th grade as I was bullied by ALOT of most attractive girls) and until I was 33 I subconsciously generalized all women into liking the same type of guy ie: the suave super confident non autistic who had the "special label" as I was in those classes half the time and never tried to date a girl as I felt too flawed and undeserving until I found out that love builds up over time as I thought women chose on the spot after talking for a half hour to be a couple or not and being autistic is not the dealbreaker of all dealbreaker I thought it was. It's more about loving another person for who they are and that no one is perfect. I'm now 36 still single/virgin but I'm trying to be myself around women (even with my female friends) but still find myself masking my autism like I have been doing those 20 years.

[@Hudson470]

I'm Incel and I'm 33 years old, I know what it's like, it's something that messes with your self-esteem too much, and can even generate emotional illnesses and scars in our soul... I think I'm ugly, discouraged, sad, head down, many girls and women already rejected me

[@someonestrange2818]

This is depressing because they're all so young. Just a little bit of positive guidance would make a huge difference.

[@anderson-gb8rp]

Not all of us are young.

[@scifirealism5943]

I've received positive guidance. I know now I can't expect sex without work. At the same time, I'm sad because other people are having sex when I'm not. I'm abnormal for being a virgin at 28.

[@alanmorris4896]

I thought i was an incel but after this video i realized i'm mostly a misanthrope. I love to be alone

[@drugsorme2714]

Did the incel community noticed that many of them said that they are autistic? Nothing wrong with having a hard time with dating if you have autism.

[@scifirealism5943]

Except autistic people get dates.

[@rickc-137___]

Dating is shallow When you are judged on a face Dont be suprised when another one takes your place

[@Nathan-qu7be]

I am a 19-year-old virgin, happy enough, making my way through life and I even have a beautiful long-term girlfriend who loves me too shockingly. My only point being really is sex isn't really all there is to life, like incels and black-pilled men just because you're a virgin doesn't actually mean anything of substance. There is a whole community begging outside for volunteers, and I bet you'll feel a lot better about yourself and those around you when doing something that doesn't keep you cooking up depressing lies about yourself when by yourself.

[@milotherussianblue3691]

This is like the most first-world problem I’ve ever heard of.

[@alissa8760]

Incel men hating women while simultaneously blaming women for how pathetic they are is actually just a universal problem that breeds violence and misogyny…

[@YouKnowUsTV]

I wouldn’t call mental issues due to a lack of human interaction a first world problem it’s kind of human nature to desire connections

[@ObakuZenCenter]

Unfortunately incels in the US are also often right wingers. That combination is dangerous and should be treated as the clear and present danger that they are. As recognized by every major law enforcement agency in the US, they are the most serious terroristic threat in the nation. It's not a trivial problem.

[@nevswain478]

yep, because other countries don't have a strong relliance on social media apps to find a mate and date.

[@N4chtigall]

"Most first-world problem"? You think that lack of support for men in our society, plummeting birth rates, raising number of virgins and people who are giving up on relationships because it just became too hard and many, many more is "most first-world problem"? I don't know if you realize but this "first-world problem" may be the reason that the entire countries will collapse. Literally. Who is gonna work? Who is gonna pay taxes? Who is gonna fund all the social programs? Yeah, exactly.

[@orlokknoxxcast]

Hard reality - dating and relationships are based on your looks, including height. Personality only matters when you already have the door opened from having decent looks. I'm 35 and no amount of self improvement I've done has made a difference. My looks and height are what stop me from attracting women.

[@Alex-kt8qe]

I think there is a difference between incel and virgin. People can still be virgins and focus on passions, work or business. Incela seem to roll around in their own misery/inadequacy.

[@scifirealism5943]

Yep.

[@devaxionrl8189]

The label makes no difference. It’s more of a pre-determined circumstance/situation in which men cannot get laid even if they try. The differences between a virgin who can’t get sex and doesn’t proclaim himself as a “Incel” versus one who does proclaim is essentially negligible.

[@kareemabdul1]

nobody is a virgin by choice if a female hasnt said you are hot in the last MONTH! its over

[@alexw6849]

Incel = involuntary celibate. If you want to fullfil your sexual needs but you can't then you are by definiton an incel

[@kendreamer6376]

Yup alot of negative self talk and self loathing. Everyone can feel the negative vibes they are dumping out into the world. Most normal people steer clear of that type of energy. It's boardline anti social and almost psychopathy.

[@juanguatemala4874]

The sad thing is even if these guys did eventually meet up with a girl she probably wouldn't stick around only compounding these guys relationship problems

[@mattildeo1950]

Hello Tom: just wanted to let you know that I'm a 33 years old autistic woman, i've been alone for the last 9 years of my life (and had zero proposition during that time). Not only guys are feeling unable to have a relationship. I also feel like i'm not living in the same society as ppl I see in the street, but I also feel i'm not living in yours neither. It's not a male /female issue, and i'm not spending my time insulting men as your community is doing for females...

[@Walkingadversity]

Although I’m not technically an Incel since I’ve been involved in a non platonic relationship in the past, I’ve been ostracized for a long time now socially, romantically and sexually. It’s good to see the majority of the comments here showing empathy even if they disagree. While I myself don’t condone violent actions or thoughts, loneliness, deprivation, harassment in school, and rejection despite trying can really screw up your mind to the point where you MIGHT become radicalized.

[@5cripted785]

black pill is real

[@nsbd90now]

No it isn't. It is from a science-fiction movie. It's a safe bet anyone who goes on about "red pills" and so on isn't getting good grades in school.

[@nobodyofimportance3922]

"It is difficult to find happiness within oneself, but it is impossible to find it anywhere else." - Arthur Schopenhauer

[@allie3004]

Any sympathy I felt for them was lost within seconds seeing those misogynistic messages. No woman should have to be with men who see women that way. It’s their horrible personality that means they’re alone.

[@whita-db9zw]

Why don't these incels just date each other? Problem solved!

[@131313MOCS]

“I have not spoken to a woman in 3 years.” That’s it? Rookie numbers.

[@Ashbelfi]

You can't blame a lot of us who literally can't find anyone here, it's just that difficult. Too high standards, passing by Peter Parker but wanting Spiderman everyday is the exact way I can describe it now.

[@kek22219]

I don't have a arm, I walk with a limp and I have autism and I have a partner. What's your excuse other than your unrealistic standards?

[@kek22219]

Trust me mate it has nothing to do with your look, it's your personality.

[@anderson-gb8rp]

The Peter Parker and Spiderman analogy is soo good and true. It's literally the same guy but in MJ's mind there is no way a nerdy loser is Spiderman, it doesn't even cross her mind that it could be him.

[@pluckybellhop66]

I can blame you. Nobody is entitled to my body. I'm a csa survivor and I just want to be alone.

[@hardutrares643]

cringe

[@BlackieNuff]

InCel Dad : "So, when you gonna get a girlfriend, Son?" InCel Son : "Probably when females are born blind, Dad. Or, when there are no more chads in society. Perhaps both."

[@Mystefier]

It's interesting differently our society treats incel men versus incel women.

[@vista1456786]

The Raymond part was so depressing, seems like the gym was actually working for him (health wise), and he intentionally does not do what he enjoys due to the pursuit of a relationship.

[@olly078]

Thats my man declineee

[@charlotte5922]

I am a female and I just feel sorry for most of these boys. It is all from the way the perceive themselves and obviously they are insecure. I hate the thought that people think they are ugly and unlovable, it just isn't true at all.

[@munkqiking7207]

Amazing how quickly men forget how brutal dating is for men as soon as they get into a relationship. Every single time. You start acting like women as a gender have no faults. Its always mens fault! Men youre just insecure! Men you need to work onyour personality! Men youre not doing enough! Tell me since you (and everyone else here) are such experts on male-female social dynamics, what flaws and issues do women need to work on? Since you have so much to say about men. Oh wait, let me guess, women are already perfect as they are. Thats the sentiment young men are met with. Its no wonder they feel like they cant win, you halfwits keep stacking the chips against them in EVERY interaction or circumstance.

[@thomasduartehs]

60% of american males are singles. This is not a niche issue. You can interview a random office worker if you wsnna talk about incels.

[@ehsanazerbaijanli1738]

Im 27 virgin to this day,have good family,okay job and university degree,the people around me always wondered why im single,i wondering myself, maybe i ask few girls or im not wealthy.i know be alone man is hard but we must improve ourselves and not hateful to girls.they have right to choose .Finding girlfriend is part of life not the life itself. I try live happy and try to find girlfriend but if i didn't i keep trying to be successful even im live in iran (east Azerbaijan province if you wonder why i call myself Azerbaijani)and there is alot of problem like very high inflation. So to friends who like me an incel ,virgin or celibate.try see good things in your life ,try to find girlfriend but focus on other part of life. Your work is important and after that your fitness.if you are depression like me , still you must fight in this harsh life.I hope all of us can have happy and good life.

[@Mike-01234]

As a person who had lot of trouble when I was younger long before incel's and the internet existed for me my problems started at a young age in grade school 6 or 7th grade. I had dandruff girls would call me disgusting, I was bullied by everyone even teachers. What they got me to believe I was all those things about myself. That is where I I went wrong. I learned to stay away from bullies and mean girls who hanged around with those kids. That sort of stuck with me all the way through high school. Kids that have low self-esteems attract bullies because they are easy targets. Somehow, I actually had a few GFs in my late teens years it was short lived. Looking back on it now I remember girls who did like me I had judged myself to the point where I felt like I wasn't worth much why would anyone like me. I can remember sitting alone and thinking what my future would be like. I remember this girl leaving her phone number in my yearbook she went out of her way to sign it I didn't think anything about it. There is lot of other things that happened I'm married now been for long time in my 50's now. It wasn't girls who were the problem it was me I was the one who was broken. If you're having trouble in life with meeting girls try to figure out how to improve your own life even if you have to get therapy, do it don't waste your younger years on sitting around feeling sorry for yourself.

[@spytechchronicles]

There are plenty of incels all over the world

[@thoughts8182]

I've been on both ends of the spectrum and it makes no sense to me why people keep denying this harsh reality. During my teenager years, I was overweight and ugly. People often made fun of my looks. But later on, I got surgery and got in the gym and everything changed. I get approached by girls IRL now and several girls from my past have popped up to me on social media wanting to 'hang out'. I personally feel that in order to rectify the incel situation, cosmetic surgery should be made freely available for men who are incredibly ugly. And secondly, speech and language therapists should also be freely available. Some incels have spent many years alone, so naturally their social skills has decline. Finally, this idea that women are perfect little angels who don't choose men for shallow reasons (Men do so aswell) needs to end. A significant number of women choose who to date based on their looks, money and status. But looks play a huge part.

[@harsh3948]

"Finally, this idea that women are perfect little angels who don't choose men for shallow reasons (Men do so aswell) needs to end" It won't. Women will virtue signal and gaslight till hell freezes over but never admit they're shallow

[@zeenmuch90]

I can see through the mask that this first incel "Tom" has the potential and possibility to find a women. Cosmetic surgery is not a solution. It might apply in certain situations, but who pays for the "free" surgery?

[@muhammadhuzaifahmohamedsal2697]

yes! this! there is an assumption that women are all angels who wont pick and choose men based on their looks or job status! Go ask ANY woman if they'd date a guy working at Target stacking shelves or taking orders at Taco Bell/KFC. a resounding 99% would say no. The remaining 1% would say yes, provided the guy is good looking!

[@thoughts8182]

@@zeenmuch90 Well, it's up to them to work hard to earn that money. I've heard of people working day job, coming home getting sleep and then doing a few hours doing some food delivery shifts. If you spend a year working two jobs, you can easily save enough for surgery

[@lovejunkie490]

@@harsh3948You mean people like attractive people or people that can bring something to the table ? No way ! 😮 thanks captain obvious. 🤦‍♀️ You have to have at least one of that. You don’t need to make 10k a month or look like brad Pitt though but yeah Sherlock, people don’t want to date ugly, overweight people with toxic behavior and personality. Welcome to the real world baby

[@dusklvr]

All I know of love has been excruciating pain and loss. Everything I learned about love, I learned while working in a nursing home.

[@the_awakening332]

Incels: Why can’t I find a gf? Also incels: *spends all day inside never putting themselves out there, doesn’t take care of themselves, spends all day complaining about women voicing hatred and violence towards them

[@PhilipJames-i2q]

I’m not an incel but understand why they feel like this. Most women these days are selfish and only interested in you for what they can get out of you.

[@TK_GX]

im 33 and have never had a date or relationship. ive been a neet on my computer since I was 15. i have aspergers syndrome. and ive been on a computer online for a long time. every friend i meet online through video games or what have you, when I ask if they have ever had a girlfriend or close female friends, almost all of them said no they had not. The issue is far worse than we know or realize. Labeling all men who don't have a partner ever as "incel" just brands them with a blanket term that mostly normal people use to "avoid these undesirable people". Its a term that normal people who have had relationships or casual encounters use. It doesn't matter if you're kind or gentle or patient or caring. Or even angry or moody or irrational. Its completely irrelevant your personality and who you are. Once you are labeled "incel" by people, its over for you, man or woman.

[@Saulgoodman67677]

I’m only 18 but from what I’ve experienced as well as seen around me, it’s normally very hard to find a girlfriend/partner if you’re only doing stuff to deliberately find a gf. You can’t join a club or social event purely for getting a gf, that’s never going to work. You need to be confident in yourself, pursue your aspirations and hobbies first. Live life, and maybe you’ll bump into someone and form a strong friendship with someone which could develop into something more eventually. It has to come naturally, you can’t force it and it sure as well doesn’t help thinking all women are the same. However this is only from my experience and what I’ve seen from those around me. I’m still young as well as all the other guys around me and so it’s easier to find a gf/female friends and change who we are. I rather more feel terrible for middle aged men who are lonely, idk what the solution would be.

[@nurtaytulegenov7431]

There is none. At this point, a person is already formed and becomes very resistant to changing. If one is a virgin with no dating experience by the age of 23-25 (around that time), then he will remain alone in 99% of the cases. Either cope or rope

[@Ascendify5]

most men are not incel because a 3 thinks she deserves a 10

[@decline01]

Oh wow it's me...

[@OnyxTank]

Pretty sad lol

[@brickofwar9727]

Yo

[@kormak8280]

you're famous bro.

[@AbuBased731]

@mr.m6038 Certified Teeheee momento

[@beganitdidnt6535]

@mr.m6038 asexualmaxxing lol

[@RICOMOVIES]

So being lonely, is now a crime. Great,thanx for that.

[@clol6049]

thanks for ignoring the fact they actively shame women

[@cuatro336]

The reason we have incels isn't because of women. It's because of other men. Guys me, that live a normal life, pointed at these guys and laughed when we were teenagers. Maybe not even deliberate bullying, just not taking them or their mental health struggles seriously. Now, it has created an entire identity class.

[@berrypatchhusbando5263]

I may not be an incel (I currently have a wonderful wife and two kids) - but I used to be one. I got extremely lucky. Right place, right time, right person. That being said, I sincerely empathize and identify with these men. If I had found out about inceldom and the redpill/blackpill before I got married... I don't know what kind of state I'd be in now.

[@MrFreakyFatBoy]

I used to feel the same. I finally managed it at 34, and to be honest relationships are difficult and painful. Loneliness was easier!! But it should not be that way….. it should not be so hard. I’m 58 now and that relationship almost killed me.

[@saelaird]

Globalisation, dating apps and feminism has left an absolutely enormous underclass of incel men... theyre growing in number and they know they're getting a raw deal. I'm not one... but I see their struggle.

[@DoReMewMew]

I grieve for these young men. It feels like crabs in a bucket, for them to feel so much hurt and hatred for yourself and a path of life you think you're stuck in, and to just perpetuate it... The darkness hatred they feel towards not just women but other groups of people is hard to look past or forgive, but the constant circulation of hatred and hurt caused by loneliness and longing for compassion and humanity... that kind of hurt runs deep, and to know there are those who would perpetuate it and continue keeping themselves and others hurting is tragic.

[@CaptHiltz]

Speaking as a man I don't think most women care what a guy looks like and the one's that are hung up on physical appearences probably aren't fun to be around anyway.

[@yoleeisbored]

"Hello female" wow

[@Alexander-zt9kz]

We were born ugly. The world will never forgive us for it.

[@CraxiPostazione]

Woah so people still use the word "incel" to talk about incels, well i'm happy about this, it's been 4 years since everyone uses the word "incel" to talk about "every person i don't agree with"

[@cat_astronaut_]

When the 30y old man says "maybe get a job" you know exactly what is the problem. Dude, stop pursuing girls, go get a job! How do you even pay your bills, your water and house???

[@bjorneriksson107]

Bro, Raymond seems like he’s doing the right thing, he’s improving himself and seems inteligente. I’m hoping the best for him and hope he’s happy in his self improvement journey which he’s doing really good at.

[@sweattvchannel9156]

Been a incel for 2 years now and didn’t even know it

[@Buddyboyo7]

Yep so many guys are incels in denial or just lack the self awareness.

[@nocturnaljoe9543]

@@Buddyboyo7 I bet 200 bucks over 50% of the resentfull people in the comments here, beating down on incels are IID themselves. The rest if mostly women who think they would not be incels, if they had been born male. I dare them: Just do the test. Make a profile with a picture of you. Use an app to turn your digital persona into a male and try to have any success. Best of luck buddy boyerinas.

[@JessssssssJesssss]

The literal term of being involuntary celibate isn’t that bad but if you take it out on an entire group of people that’s when it turns bad

[@beganitdidnt6535]

@@Buddyboyo7 yep the ones that make fun of them they really need a blackpill moment mine was just being the ugly friend of the group which was a bunch of blackpill moments but i assume these people dont have friends and cope with money or something idk they are super delusional and narrow minded its weird asf

[@icomefromoogaboogaland]

​@@nocturnaljoe9543brootal. OvER for buddy boyerinas 😢

[@AlbertBalbastreMorte]

the title alone is incredibly biased. Let people draw their own conclusions.

[@Cheetahlover]

i am an incel. i am not hateful. you can ask me anything

[@BeanerMoney]

Why don't you get your money up and not your funny up?

[@Buto.7103]

I know that u don't hate women, because things are how they are, u can't change people and there's nothing u can do about it, its just their nature, do you agree?

[@mattdestroyed]

This woman is exactly what these guys are talking about.

[@kaecet]

makes sense that you guys would hate on a caring woman that is able to empathize and listen to losers like you. you would rather get with someone you know will make you feel bad so afterwards when all is said and done you can blame the other person and feel sorry for yourselves

[@philipdefrancisco7540]

They are trying to protect themselves from hurt by avoiding life in its entirety. By assuming a negative outcome and avoiding interaction, that can be achieved. For some people, it is worth it. They lack the self-confidence needed to develop a relationship. Resentment is used as justification.

[@j.d.s.8132]

The best indicator to forecast future events is past events. You normies always downplay this stuff as if it was a 50/50 coin toss wether the girl says yes or no, when in reality you either get a no or get humiliated on top of you are extra unattractive. Life is not a disconnected sequence of events, it is one linear experience.

[@Pleebian94]

Envy of others, body dysmorphia, outdated gender beliefs, insecurity, self loathing, and potential narcissism has created this toxic mess. On one hand they need help, but on the other they look down on getting help as Manosphere doctrines has these young men in a invisible prison cell of their own making. They crave yet loathe women in a paradoxical duality of thought. Thought that originates from others via the Manosphere. How do you help those who hate themselves as well as having a external locus of control?

[@florindalucero3236]

Nailed it!

[@BuzziMuzzi]

@@j.d.s.8132 Re-read the comment. He's descriving you. "They are trying to protect themselves from hurt by avoiding life in its entirety. By assuming a negative outcome and avoiding interaction, that can be achieved." Stop. Assuming.

[@udontevenwannaknowbruv]

⁠@@j.d.s.8132 What a loser mentality, maybe it’s better that these incels hide in their mom’s basement. Nobody wants a sulking, sad manbaby. Life is tough for everybody on different aspects, normal people just choose to get over it and use it to become a better person and prove others wrong. There are people who literally went through war, lost half their family and still managed to build their lives up and become successful. And here these incels are, crying about looking ugly while having safety, a place to live and food. B-b-but the girls are being so mean to me, my life is miserable 😢 What a joke

[@TheDragon4775]

Mogs me for having an incel friend group.

[@MarkMark-uc6gq]

These women get used up and then want good men

[@zumazuma568]

you can't "use up" a person: it's a living being, not a finite source of something that can run out.