Is baptism necessary for salvation?

I had an outreach conversation with Charles, a deacon in his church who is adamant that adult full-emersion, believer’s baptism is necessary for salvation. And our conversation didn’t end in an argument as it well could have, since I don’t share his view.
I have to admit that for someone to insist that such a controversial issue become the focus so quickly in a conversation between strangers shows an unhealthy insistence on a minor issue, when we should have rejoiced simply at the discovery that we are both believers. I asked Charles to share his story, which included a stark contrast between his former life of womanizing and selfish pursuits, and a complete turnaround upon being baptized.
Based on his own powerful and personal experience it was understandable that Charles emphasized the importance of baptism, and I didn’t believe that anything I could say in a short conversation could or should convince him otherwise, so I basically bit my tongue and tried to focus on beliefs we have in common, especially when it comes to encouraging evangelism.
Charles would say that baptism is no minor issue, but I disagree. There is room for disagreement among sincere, faithful Christians who have a variety of positions concerning it, from infant baptism to a simple, symbolic sprinkling to full immersion. My view of scripture passages regarding baptism are likewise based on my experiences having been baptized as an infant in a Lutheran church.
In my experience, my infant baptism was indeed meaningful to me because it was a reminder (when I was older, as I observed other infant baptisms) that while I was yet a sinner in unbelief, before I had any choice in the matter, Christ died for me. It was also a sign of the blessings of being born with believing parents and in a Christian community. I was later able to acknowledge my acceptance and gratitude for this blessing when I was confirmed as a believer in my Lutheran church as a teenager.
But this sign could just as easily have been given to me by being dedicated as an infant by my parents, who, with the help of the local church, committed to raise me in a Christian upbringing. In the end I began to see believer’s baptism as meant to be one of the first acts of obedience of a follower of Jesus, and a powerful sign of identification with Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection. After much prayer, fasting, and wrestling with God’s Word over the matter, I finally decided to be baptized as an adult, and I saw it as not a rejection of my infant baptism and Christian upbringing, but a confirmation and completion of the good thing Christ and His Church had begun in me that day.
I would call baptism a minor issue, both because of these heartfelt differences but also because it was treated almost an afterthought by the apostle Paul. In 1 Cor. 1 Paul wrote “I thank God that I did not baptize any of you except Crispus and Gaius, so no one can say that you were baptized in my name. (Yes, I also baptized the household of Stephanas; beyond that, I don’t remember if I baptized anyone else.) For Christ did not send me to baptize, but to preach the gospel…”
And that’s what I want to do and what I want to encourage fellow believers like Charles to do in street and marketplace outreach conversations. Not to push a particular view of doctrines like baptism, but to give people a reason to be baptized in the first place - an identification with the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus.

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God bless you! Jeff🎉