Is It YOUR Fantasy - or Theirs (Narcissists, Psychopaths, Borderlines)?

[@JulianotKaren]

Thank you Professor Vaknin for the wealth of knowledge that you share with us. I wish you well.

[@stresoterapia]

Wonderful and clear distinction- thank you so much!

[@Dystopia2024]

Another masterpiece lecture. Thank you professor.

[@thelau61]

Thanks for the thorough breakdown/explanation, professor 👍

[@nicolamills8003]

Wow, just wow!

[@marta7089]

WOW, amazing video , Prof. Sam Vaknin you are amazing!!! Thank you!

[@OlympianVenus]

Can you do a video exclusively on a psychopathic (malignant) narcissist? My ex had elements of both narcissist and psychopath. He wanted to isolate me from my family so I can do what he wanted and in return he offered the love I never had.

[@Lizbeth-vt2nm]

Vaknin, thank you for this information. My husband also has both traits of NPD and Psychopathy. He has not been diagnosed but his behavior checks every box of what you shared. Thank you!

[@Phoenix_mAyB]

In the beginning of my relationship my ex was exactly like how prof. is describing a psychopath and after a few months seeing me still choose him over everything he started behaving like how prof. Is describing a narcissist. 😢😢

[@Roniwalnut5461]

Hey professor thanks for content

[@alinajeziorska5959]

Thank you proferor Vaknin so much

[@PM-gp3oy]

Thank you so much Sam this answers so many questions i had in my mind about a narc i dealt with.

[@juliamorgan4878]

Wow! That reminds me of the Chris Watts case. His wife stated many times how he was a wonderful husband etc. yet he was a psychopath. No one could believe what happened because he acted like he was such a terrific husband and father. Absolutely mind blowing! Thank you for explaining this.

[@susanhogan439]

Excellent video! My last relationship was with a Psychopath and my present one with high traits of Narcissism. Thank you so much for distinguishing the differences for me. You were right on point with the distinctions. This clears up a lot for me .

[@snoozyq9576]

Yea this sounds like my experience. I was promised the world and the fantasy became more and more crazy.

[@MsNupagadi]

Thank you Prof. Vaknin! Amazing talk on such a confusing topic! It makes so much more sense, now that you explained everything that clear!

[@AremAsha]

When I mentioned how “right” it all was, he said “I know my customers.” At the end he mocked me for falling for our “perceived connection.”

[@birgit3259]

😮

[@monadhar2682]

Bam💣

[@leftitallbehind]

Sickening

[@sheilaphifer6677]

I’m confused because ‘he’ was clinically diagnosed with npd, but he created my ideal fantasy, I felt and saw him ‘studying’ me, staring etc which is consistent with psychopathy. He tried to create the life of my dreams and the a light switch would flip and he would give me a chilling cold look and be gone

[@samvaknin]

NPD is often misdiagnosed. You are describing a psychopath.

[@marti77k84]

It’s all about the pursuit of love , but when the person truly loves them , bcuz not all of their qualities are bad , they nvr except it and they throw it away and trash it , then on to the nxt to still find that love that they had there all along .. but we are all bad now 😢

[@missta1820]

My male friend who could possibly a covert Narcissist has mentioned over a 4 year period that his Mother has cancer. It's always a different form of cancer when I ask him. He never refers to her going for any treatment or hospitalisation. The fact is I have met this lady and she is active and healthy looking. Where does the cancer come into the picture? They have a bearable but strained relationship. She is a stern looking woman but I don't really know her. My friend was born of out of wedlock and has never met his real Father. He has tried to turn me into a Mother figure with services, safety, but not sex. The last one suits me as he is highly promiscuous as well as drug addled.

[@markrichter2053]

Prof Vaknin, with such adroit panache, communicates insight which carries the power to set victims and survivors like myself free!

[@productioninquiries881]

Putting "Psychopaths Only" on my dating profile because I've CLEARLY been doing it wrong.

[@juliamorgan4878]

Except you may end up like Shan’ann Watts.

[@itsbb_blue]

Can the fantasy contained both elements that vacillate? Sometimes narcissistic and sometimes psychopathic?

[@samvaknin]

Only in the case of a malignant (psychopathic) narcissist.

[@sheerkatdotcom]

Yes my experience was both and changed weekly, would be the psychopathic style when he felt he was loosing his grip and narcissistic style fantasy when I was giving the attention needed

[@Dystopia2024]

My experience as well. Narcissistic shared fantasy does not work anymore? The victim resists and sets boundaries that do not match the narcissist's expectations? Eureka: simply switch over to the victim's fantasies and wishes and keep conning him to obtain her goals. She still failed.

[@arabianprincess85]

Wow. It finally makes sense. My ex was a malignant narcissist. He did both of these things depending on the stages of the relationship. In the very end when I left him he displayed the psychopathic aspects of shared fantasy -- promising everything I wanted only to disappear. Thank you for this video!

[@a.acquah4187]

How does one avoid such creatures for the rest of life!? 😮😫

[@alexhiller3088]

theirs

[@JavierMares]

Professor Vaknin, thanks again for your wisdom. Is there value in watching footage from NDP and psychopaths if someone, now equipped with your models, wishes to build an intuition for how these people communicate, emote, move, steer or are steered in a conversation? If so, could you please recommend any such resources?

[@realpilBMF]

What?

[@paullothyan8602]

Can you talk a little about ALEXITHYMIA

[@krishnavideos108]

Hare Krishna

[@Viktor-x8v4s]

Is there an evolution of those PD? For example from borderline to narcissist to psychopath?

[@samvaknin]

Search the comorbdities and the mind playlists.

[@sarahwyndham]

One of the first videos I watched by you a while ago, you were talking about what it feels like for the partner to experience the narcissist in their space, how your anxiety goes up and even if you were healthy before the relationship, you will become so dysregulated you'll behave exactly like a borderline. You also mention them being alien-like and subterranean. Ive watched 50 more videos now trying to find that specific video, could you please tell me the title, if you remember?

[@samvaknin]

Try the playlists.

[@fastjack1279]

I'm am a 55 year old man I'm in a marriage I believe she's a narcissist there is also her son is 35 year old man it's I have been married for 7 years her son has always been in the house with me and us like a baby sitter of sorts he also is on fyntinal and meth my wife is a head nurse at a rehab I am diagnosed bi-polar and PTSD I now I believe that my wife is a narcissist and her son is a psychopath he has held me down at times and opened his mouth up close to my face and either tried to extract something from me or tried to put something into me believe it or not this crap is real it is assault but no I try to Tell his mother and she will always be on his side if i go to the police she will tell the police that i was the aggressor and its just not true im not allowed to be with his mother for very long im not really sure why that is but regardless of what i say if i say something if i tell her whats happening she doesn't want to hear it he is the golden child man there is a lot more to this situation when she goes to work all the gaslighting she does to me he takes over where she left of it at times feel's like a hate crime my job was to clean up after her and her son while she is at work while he sits in his room hacking any thing he can get his hands on finding ways to hack my phone its really disgusting thats just the tip of the iceberg he has to steal everything they both lie about everything I am now living in my car in the driveway at a house I pay part of the rent for over a year now I'm on disability which makes it difficult to leave plus I don't have anyone friends or family to help me I don't stay in the house anymore because the both gaslight me constantly and noise campaign me because I chose to be up at night so I don't have to hear all the information the degrading the lie's and the criticism and i stay in my car that never get any gas so i cant go anywhere im so isolated so the problem got worse when i told them im not cleaning up after anybody anymore that pissed them both off there is so much more im going to sue both of them if i get out of here alive

[@EAGLESWINGS-4316]

I have the problem of feeling frozen ever since leaving the narcissist. Cps forced me to divorce because of abuse and him shooting in the house. I had to pick him or the kids. I picked me kids...3 years later still feel frozen. Any ideas..contact is minimal as possible but still bad interactions.

[@DavyErni-y6c]

Getting borderline was not my fantasy it was their method of takedown before the theft. They just never expcted i would learn to row with the broken oares they left me with , now i thrive . It scares them 😊🫶🙏😇🥰🥰❤️&Light