Is THIS a Sign Your Relationship is Over?

[@nannyboo9832]

Audrey was spot on. Communication is key and a lot of it is fear based… and the longer you let it fester, the more awkward it is and it’s hard to come back from.

[@fionakarbel258]

In my experience being turned on and finding someone sexy is wayyyy more than their looks. I find that as I get to know more about the person, and don’t see them being ambitious in life, or don’t take responsibility for things, momma’s boy, etc. etc., it completely takes away the sexiness. It is also the danger of having sex too early in the relationship. Hopefully I know better now for future relationships.

[@ewolffe8355]

The sex can be good at the beginning, but that doesnt necessarily mean both parties were putting the same level of effort into finding out what the other wants or saying what they want. Sometimes the decline in sex is just a symptom of one party realising the rel is one-sided or no longer what works. The other party may be lovely, but just not right for you. And intimacy changes can be a key sign.

[@justinael]

I don't like the idea that a woman should protect a man's ego. We are told how to behave, how to be subtle, how the poor guy will feel awful that he is bad in bed. What about women? Unhappy, lonely, not feeling loved, respected or wanted BUT protecting his ego... Sorry, I'd rather talk about the issue than pretend and humiliate myself.

[@alethea6781]

Having married someone with whom there was never much of a spark, I don’t recommend that. I do think from subsequent experience that there are lots of ways to spike things up.

[@alethea6781]

I was unclear that I think if you start with a spark, it can be maintained or renewed. I have found the sex begets more sex practice to be a fail. It was dangerously close to feeling like sexual assault, despite being consensual. Talking about fantasies together, including ones you want to keep in the fantasy zone, is both a turn- on and grist for the mill.

[@alethea6781]

Do you want him to avoid saying things that you might find sexist that his buddies think are funny? Do you want him to listen to details about your hobby/friend/work that aren’t interesting to him? Do you want him to put the seat down on the toilet? There are things we want from men that they don’t care much about. Some of them are ego, some are personal but not ego. I think we all need to be kind to each other, not to a degree of bringing back the patriarchy.

[@jga4750]

girl i love u

[@lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559]

But would you want your partner to humiliate you? How would you feel if they told you, 'you're nice and kind, but nothing about you turns me on, and I find being with you sexually unfulfilling'? It's not fair for ANYONE to be more blunt and hurtful to their partner than they themselves would like in return. This woman has said her partner is kind and loving towards her - don't you think he deserves a little more TACT than you're suggesting? If she thinks he's worth trying for, shebshould at least try to improve their intimacy in a less direct way, before deciding and telling him that they're sexually incompatible. It takes 2 to tango, remember, so that incompatibility is not his fault. A good approach in relationships is to aim to leave your partner better than you found them, lol. Make them stronger/kinder/more confident for having been with you. At the very least, try not to leave them worse for having dated you. Hurting a partner's feelings because you can't be bothered not to or because you're angry at men in general, won't accomplish that, and you'll let youself down that way too.

[@thisbrendalee]

I find a lot of people from the beginning come into relationships just thinking if they have great chemistry in the beginning, they don't need to necessarily be 'intentional' and 'nurture' that THROUGHOUT the relationship. Do you have weekly/monthly check-ins with your partner? Asking each other how would you rate our relationship, what do you like about our relationship, what do you want to improve/explore/try together? And truly being HONEST, open and communicative to each other. It is also true (I read in another comment below), attraction is not just 'looks' or 'chemistry'. It's all forms of love languages AND being the best version of yourself. Do you compliment them (make them feel desired/loved/seen), putting in effort to have fun 'date nights', looking physically good/put together (than just wearing pj's all day everyday), being curious about their goals, setting goals together, acts of service, putting yourself in different environments and trying new activities so your partner SEES you are growing, moving. I don't believe in the 'honeymoon phase'. Not if you're both excited about life, have growth mindsets and are always nurturing the relationship from DAY 1. Biggest thing is flirting. What do you do to create a 'new identity' / side of yourself that makes your partner lift their eyebrow and go, who is that? that's my partner, but dayum I've never seen that side of her!

[@brandidamore1751]

Nothing will work if there is lingering resentment. Forced intimacy without fixing that won't work. Women find it hard to sexually engage when there is resentment makes sex feel transactional. How you feel about your partner for a woman is so tied into the a stoking of feeing generated by the relationship, not a switch. If there is resentment for, say, taking on more household stuff, or asking your partner to do this thing over and over, it's hard to be sexual no matter what mechanics you do.

[@vegancatlady1017]

Watching porn is the worst advice I ever heard. My ex cheated multiple of times & was addicted to porn & he even paid for cam girls. So how does watching porn together help me ? That would help him. It would be a trigger & I would feel insecure him watching & lusting over other women.

[@joleencox5900]

Amen!! Sex is something that absolutely HAS TO BE nurtured along the way. People change over time, you cannot expect what worked 10 yrs ago with no change or attempts to "spice things up", to continue to work all those years later. If someone loves you, they will have grown with you and they will see your needs that have changed and vice versa. The problem is security and complacency, thats why relationships take work on both sides!!!

[@sandraderuijter2525]

I agree with Audrey and would prefer honest conversation. Women should not be needing to tip toe around a mans ego. An open and honest conversation about what she considers good sex is important. I think men should get over themselves. In terms of sexual growth men should listen to a womans input.

[@DTraiN5795]

Please most women just want you to know. It’s let’s them think it’s meant to be and he just gets me. This is why they get with men who make them feel good sexually. Which doesn’t make for a good relationship

[@DTraiN5795]

See you should be able to communicate but I can’t tell also you don’t know how a man feels at his best and will bring out his best self. There’s biology in all this from 1000s of years of this. We all bring different things and are better at certain things. To not care about your man’s confidence level, which any women should be concerned about, means you don’t understand how the vast majority of men work

[@AmieOlsonalo]

Communication is so key when it comes to the sexual part of a relationship. Being able to tell each other what you enjoy is so important. Also, change things up a little rather than getting stuck in the rut of having sex the same way all the time. A new location, new room, new position or going on a mini vacation to be intimate and spice things up sexually can be fun and exciting. I completely agree about the working out as well. Take care of yourself physically.

[@plusflammer]

Find your love language and your partners love language. Then activly implemt them in daily pratice to boost your attraction for oneanother☺️

[@netanyacimone1895]

I feel this video doesn't address knowing when your relationship is over and accepting that you're not compatibile so you can move on to a relationship that's more fitting.

[@RealTalk-mq2ug]

the waves of grief come crushing me. one moment I'm okay. the next I'm in panicked despair. how could my best friend do this to me? abandon and betray me and discard me like garbage? how? how could he so easily replace me with another? my heart is shattered; my soul is raped. rage and grief: torment and torture me, leaving me breathless...

[@elskar1]

I think that there could also be a mental/ emotional block when it comes to not feeling close enough to be intimate .Trust that has been lost may also be an issue that creates distance

[@louieavi]

The small problem I have with Audrey's comments, is women use too much talk or discussion too soon. I prefer to start with a visual, taste, touch or smell to start up chemistry, then talk after the fact. If the man sees potential for more, he's more open for the "talk".

[@janettewong9900]

I think this question needed more context. It’s very open-ended and no one is totally wrong here

[@afimaci]

Yea, it’s literally tiring how much they tie relationships to hormones and sex. When most relationships are broken because of much more important stuff being broken….the last thing that is important is the field of sex. It is not possible to be good in bed together if all other aspects are not working…sex is just sex if there’s a lack of good communication, lack of openness, honesty, common goals, being a good team and constantly working on one’s own problems so we can be better as partners as well…quality starts at honesty…if that’s not there, then everything is just a symptom and not the reason of a broken relationship…open up and communicate, stop hiding your thoughts and feelings from your partner, stop creating problems, including lying to oneself as much to the other person, as well as keeping up appearances but not addressing the real sh** (in you and between the two), etc. Sex is literally the surface, and the last piece of a much more difficult puzzle relationships are.

[@RMB5775]

There is sex and then there is real intimacy in a relationship… BIG difference!

[@AsmaaKadryWassanWorldwide]

Can I say something? It's very important for her to notice when exactly did the "fall out" happen? Because if that happened right after the honeymoon phase of their relationship, that she sort of switched off, then this can very much indicate that she has an avoidant attachment style, and if that's the case, therapy will help tremendously

[@THEDIFFERENTONE2104]

Yeah, this is a notable point

[@adriennegould7160]

This is so funny! The men in this program are also afraid of talking about it. They are resisting what your saying.

[@rocsund]

hygiene plays a big part too

[@charleneterrell]

I encourage you to do what's best for you.

[@anastasiabatyr8325]

Matthew and Audrey I love and respect you both and I hope you have a beautiful wedding. I love watching this channel because it gives such nuanced vision on important matters. Unfortunately, this was the first video ever I didn’t watch until the end. For me it felt like you were arguing to win and the different ideas confused me. Wish you all the best 🙂 I m definitely coming to the virtual retreat . Good luck, Anastasia

[@Thomassina1]

I prefer the old format when he was doing a monologue with input from his brother. The mens pov has been very useful. Is a bit on edge now.

[@DTraiN5795]

Eff that I’m straight up and I get to it quick. Once things change for even a week and I’m talking about it. If the other person can’t talk about their feelings or don’t understand how their feeling then it’s about time to call it. Pretty much mean they don’t know themselves that well, they don’t like talking about things, and they don’t want to grow as a person

[@dianeday1166]

Audrey you are so lovely, it's great having a female point of view. You are so adorable xx

[@karenfischer]

This is why so many marriages fail! Sex and attraction is one of the most delicate areas in a marriage to navigate. Being friends first before dating, I believe will help in most situations because the relationship has the four components that Matthew has outlined as Admiration, Attraction, Commitment & Compatibility. Without all four, then the relationship is doomed from the start. Just because we have chemistry does not ensure long-term sexual satisfaction.

[@aprilandpedro9823]

All this sounds like a lot of work for a relationship that hasn't even gone on that long. They're just past the honeymoon phase and these two are talking like this couple should do couples counseling already? I'd say no. If you haven't been together that long and you're getting sick of the person already then you should probably move on. And if you haven't known them long it's probably not a good idea to be having sex anyway. If you had tons of sex in the beginning...really there's only so much people can do sexually unless you get into the really weird stuff. Sounds like this relationship was mostly based on sex without the foundation of getting to know each other much and finding out if they even have anything else in common besides sex, and now since all they did together was have sex, now they're bored with each other already. Just move on. And next time take time to get to know a person before getting into bed together.

[@DTraiN5795]

Exactly and finally people who get it. So many women in these comments just blame the man and honestly a lot more could be said but this is exactly what it sounds like. Also a lot of relationships today are based off this bc it’s so common nowadays. So many partners and all they care about is the sex. It will never sustain that way as way more to it from both sides to maintain a long healthy relationship. People who put too much on sex just for their satisfaction usually will fail in the long term.

[@marrietvisser6195]

Sex was so awful with my one boyfriend that I stopped the relationship. He was so selfish, cold and only self-satisfying.

[@zero1188]

Relationship over

[@hawaiigirl8089]

The guy who said introduce Porn - NO NO NO YOU BOTH ARE WRONG. Any time you VOYER YOU SUBTRACT FROM YOURSELVES! Porn is toxic @ most healthy women Don’t want another woman even film in the bedroom. You 3 are young & on that idea - WRONG. Many people are addictive porn CAN & WILL DESTROY YOUR INTIMACY

[@tiffepatenaude]

I don’t think that introducing a little video of porn in the makeout, preliminary play will destroy the couple! If they start to need it every time yes! that would be a problem! But a lot of men find it sexy and turn on to see their partners touching themselves, and same for women seeing their partners doing it too. Then they start to touch each other and BOOM! The video isn’t even finished yet and they don’t watch it anymore because they are too busy now with each other!! It’s like everything in life, when you used something too often it’s gonna be toxic, but if you uses it strategically and in a little amount it can be beneficial, and adding just the little spark they needed to fix the problem 😊

[@slobodankaarambasic4961]

I’m not sure how much they hear and respect Audrey’s opinion here, and she does stand for us, girls, being herself one. That part when Matt talks about ego made me throw up.

[@Channel70791]

The “Yes, and…” comment at the end was so great, both as advice and as the way Matt seemed to be moderating this whole conversation between the two viewpoints. Tricky topic, and well done 👍

[@cynthiagonzales74]

Porn is cheating and it's disgusting that's the worst idea and it's immoral If I wanted to have my guy see other naked women then I'd be agreeing to him cheating. If you have to watch Other people have sex you may as well break up and date other people I guess that guy who suggested that does not have Christian values and is trying to make people live a sinful life. At that point it is not about the two people anymore and now have created another problem.

[@BeHealing]

Hmm there’s so much unknown in the question. It could be he’s let himself go, it’s very hard to find someone attractive when they stop caring for themselves. It might not be his behavior around intimacy as you have all presumed. What does throwing a Hail Mary mean? I can’t even imagine lol

[@bettyboothe2523]

When his idea of making love is "hope on", one tends to lose interest. And yes! Rejection, communication.

[@steveguti6452]

Urgent emergency Please join me in prayer for all those affected children families animals in severe flooding in California they desperately need your prayers please pray for them God bless you all

[@MoMo-vb9zq]

Short of making up lame excuses to avoid intimacy with her man that woman as an adult has to initiate discussion around the subject of her reduced attraction to him. She is doing him and herself a disservice otherwise. It doesn’t have to be brutal but it will only get worse if not addressed.

[@addyzee1335]

9:40min "introduce a little bit of porn" This is horrible advice. Lies straight out of hell. Porn is made in a low vibration (evil) state . You are a loser if you watch OTHER PEOPLE having sex. People who produce porn are creating such content from a low vibration mindset. Also people who engage in the act (porn stars) do it from a low vibration mindset. And finally people who are drawn to porn are experiencing a low vibration. It is destructive all around. It seems like a solution but it's just a temporary satisfaction for a deeper problem. Don't fall for it. There are many ways to spice up your sex life. Some of those tips were mentioned in this video. Just ignore the porn advice.

[@tiffepatenaude]

I don’t think that introducing a little video of porn in the makeout, preliminary play will destroy the couple! If they start to need it every time yes! that would be a problem! But a lot of men find it sexy and turn on to see their partners touching themselves, and same for women seeing their partners doing it too. Then they start to touch each other and BOOM! The video isn’t even finished yet and they don’t watch it anymore because they are too busy now with each other!! It’s like everything in life, when you used something too often it’s gonna be toxic, but if you uses it strategically and in a little amount it can be beneficial, and adding just the little spark they needed to fix the problem

[@gnsoapscandles]

I agree with Audrey 💖

[@davidgibson4007]

It sure is

[@alejandraware243]

30 seconds in the video, and I already know I will love it

[@hawaiigirl8089]

Agree with Matthew

[@hawaiigirl8089]

My now EX HUSBAND would never 👎 go to the gym with me.

[@steveguti6452]

Jesus Christ will Return and every knee shall bow and confess that Jesus Christ is Lord praise God praying for everyone everyday God bless you all 🙏🙌

[@playerone3144]

Alaska is watching =]

[@Anayr19]

I disagree with you Matt big time because women already have issues and fears saying what we want in sex, so if plus we are not feeling turned on, definitely the partner has to know what is going on if they want to make it work. Porn absolutely killed my relationship, so please be careful with the advice you are putting out there.

[@pearlosibu]

The no-sex thing sounds like that couple from white lotus S2

[@MoMo-vb9zq]

What does Jameson mean by Hail Mary?

[@StorytellingHeadshots]

He’s referring to a colloquial expression, “ to throw a Hail Mary pass” ... which is the kind of throw of a football with a prayer that it will work... so he means just try stuff that you don’t know will work just in case it might work. See also “on a wing and a prayer” . It’s trying something with hope that it will work rather than with knowledge that it will work.

[@ethelsollory2492]

Thanks for the content.Yes I agree sexuality may end up a relationship due to poor communication or one partner has decided to pull away, energetically not available.

[@magnaajube7784]

Mr Hussey , you are amazing! Thank you for being an adept about relationship.

[@janicejohnson9558]

And clean up to meet your friend for lunch....there might be a cute guy in the restaurant ;)

[@rachelbphotoandfilm9657]

Hi Matthew, I just found out my partner supports Andrew Tate and doesn’t understand a woman’s concern with that content. Would you have any insight?

[@monicaprivate]

Ask him what specifically he supports. Under the surface, Tate perspective represents something that's valuable in relationships.

[@ella_lala_92]

Shave the head Steve! Looks like it would suit you. 🙂

[@marshamusleh3083]

Any great comebacks with a guy flirtatiously calls you crazy and you don't like it? It's only a week into talking to him and I'm concerned he's starting some gaslighting behaviors.

[@steveguti6452]

Jesus Christ died for our Sins According to the scriptures and that he was buried and that he Rose again the third day praying for everyone everyday God bless you all 🙏🙌

[@Hilary44Hilary]

Well maybe he is cheating and that's why she should openly talk about it either they go to therapy and solve it or they break up. If he is not attracted to the woman maybe he should be honest and talk about it instead of maybe cheating with another women. Maybe he needs medication. Men and women should both know what they lack and work on it . And you think men care about women's ego or emotions?? Even if you look good they still tell you that you need to go gym . Just imagine how the table would turn if she was bad in bed ! I dont think he would wait to solve the problem

[@hawaiigirl8089]

We take one another for Granted. More men usually. So many others Thru online dating, porn, gym - looking at others… causes discontentment. Commitment equals working at it. Men TODAY ARE NOT NOT ROMANTIC. he needs to bleach his teeth, new hair cut & come home with RED ROSES 🌹 & lingerie as a surprise to her

[@PeoplePleaser578]

Even though women have infinitely more success through online dating. Men today are not romantic because Women don’t want romance - Most women say they do, but then they also say romance is clingy. Not to mention why as a man is all the emphasis on him to keep the spark alive?

[@serradjsoma8240]

❤❤❤

[@davidgibson4007]

I made her wait her for it

[@zxsw85]

Your mum didn’t make me wait

[@the2ndcoming135]

👉🏽🚪

[@sabanalopez9520]

how to make an insecure guy and with an anxious-avoindant style to feel he protects me

[@Ari_diwan]

35 views in 1 min

[@Mary-1000]

As soon as you bring up the porn IM DONE. Porn helps NO ONE. BYE.

[@dominiccharles6072]

Sounds like he has become what Corey Wayne would call a "nice guy pleaser", so she's lost attraction for him. Give him Corey's book, see if he turns it around - and if not, move on.

[@123videocity]

Less Audrey advice more MH advice please. Us ladies already know what we think & that’s why we’re here. Because we get it wrong. We need the male opinion. Couldn’t disagree with Audrey more. Do NOT have a conversation. Show don’t tell. Gym is a great example. This video feels like in-fighting with someone who’s not ready for this stage. Not on MH message. Sorry!