IS THIS THE WORST ATTACHMENT STYLE TO HAVE?!?

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EP 119: In this episode we open up the podcast by taking and "attachment style" test and seeing which attachment styles we have! obviously Sean got the worst... We then go on to answer some real life problems our viewers are having and giving our opinions on what should be done. Some of the problems we address are going to prom without a date, how to get over cheating, and dealing with strict/tough parents. HUGE TRIGGER WARNING it gets pretty intense towards the end of the podcast so BE READY. HOPE YA'LL ENJOY!!! :D
TAKE THE ATTACHMENT STYLE TEST HERE WITH US!!!
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[@scenic65]

hearing christine talk about her mom made me feel so sad for her. i had to stop it every 5 minutes to recompose myself. the last 10 minutes were so emotional that i had to stop it. just hearing maru and christine cry about what they’ve been through and watching the boys comfort them really is ❤️ but they really are what i would want in a friend group and just knowing how well the boys care for the girls is just so ❤

[@andrea-ru8qv]

Kudos to nick because not many people know how to respond when someone’s emotional. He did such a great job comforting her and keeping the conversation going.

[@Michellemarii]

Maru did such a great job hosting this episode. Probably my favorite episode so far. Thank you to everyone for sharing and special shout-out to Christine for being vulnerable and voicing what so many of us have experienced. Sending lots of love 💖

[@dylanjackson1200]

Agreed. So much love for Maru & Christine 💋

[@emelysantana570]

thank you, christine for sharing with us. lots of people with immigrant parents experience these feelings. sharing this must’ve opened their eyes on a different perspective cause it did for me.

[@KiwyHernandez]

I definitely agree with you and iv experienced a lot of what Christine mentioned and it made me feel less alone tbh we love u Christine

[@hannahig]

straight up started crying

[@beckyt3883]

yes thank you so much, christine. as someone with asian immigrant parents i relate so much and was bawling with you the whole way through, but it was really healing to hear you talk about processing the grief and trauma that a lot of us share

[@overthunk12]

@@KiwyHernandezkl

[@sarah9497]

christine had me in tears this podcast, that was so beautifully raw and she is so strong. i hope she knows how many people she saves and helps, me included

[@meganpearl914]

Ikr she’s always so real

[@j.b3671]

i was literally crying bro

[@deeyak]

nick being ignored in the beginning literally was so funny😭😭

[@StimYuLus]

fr when he said it again i was dying😂

[@amani98001]

​@@StimYuLus and a little louder too 💀💀

[@deeyak]

@@StimYuLus YEAH HAHAH

[@netsssanettt]

When what time😭

[@lydiacho]

no fr felt bad for him 💀

[@mariahbonilla8505]

I’ve never had a public figure like Christine to relate to. It’s hard not to hate your parents for what they did to you. But then again you have to remember they are people too, still growing and figuring out life. My heart goes out to your Christine. Thank you for making me feel not alone ❤️❤️❤️

[@zuzu9071]

The way the whole room turned towards sage when he said “NO” 😭😭😭😭 when Maru was asking about the prom situation

[@toastybread9267]

THAT HAD ME DEADDD he right tho

[@iitshaylee]

My school only has one prom😭

[@tba978]

christine and her wand of wisdom, u know she spitting facts when the pen pops out

[@user-vg9fl9hw8f]

fr

[@vanessaara]

when they’re all taking the quiz, it gives school vibes ☠️😂

[@em-xq6jv]

right !! or when the adults tell you to sleep at a sleepover!!

[@GamerKnowledge_]

facts 😂

[@alyssab09]

nick's smirk at the fake dating maru situation 😂😭

[@irma7192]

Christine talking about her mom made me cry so bad because I recognized myself so much in what she said. I wanna thank her for being so open about those topics because you don't hear people talking about it often... I know you guys like to joke around a lot but I also really really appreciate these moments. Christine's value that she adds to this podcast is so great and I hope she knows that.

[@sierrasansom6958]

All of you guys are admirable for being so vulnerable to a huge audience, I commend y’all. Fr the best part of my week

[@Ari-fo1tv]

TW(SA and child abuse) Listening to Christen open up about how she was beat as a child and how dismissive they were about her mental health really hit home and helped me feel seen as someone who was abused and neglected by my mother, seeing that she could find ways to cope gave me hope for my future. When I told my family I was SA’d multiple times by a childhood friend they reacted poorly and made me feel invalidated about my pain, it genuinely made me crying hearing Christens experience with telling her mom and dad broke my heart and healed a part of me. Also thank you so much Nick for saying it’s not your fault when things like this happened sometimes you just need to hear it ❤

[@yazzz_p.b9790]

🫶

[@d8isyy]

you’re so strong

[@kimthv5]

Going through being assaulted and never coping healthily and with guidance is so incredibly hard and I find myself being that little hurt girl so often nowadays

[@Ari-fo1tv]

@@kimthv5 it honestly feels like you’re mourning a person bc you lose a part of yourself 💔

[@kimthv5]

@@Ari-fo1tv it does and for me it happened at the PEAK of my life when I was really just starting to know what love is, tryna navigate middle school and my body and my friends and it’s like changed me forever but as much as I mourn the old me, I mourn the me I could have been if that had never happened to me

[@gummyprincess2012]

Nick trying to get Maru’s attention is soooo funny she completely ignored him 💀🤣🤣 1:29

[@lol0lol0lol]

that ending had me crying so much. thank you christine for sharing that with us. you are so strong and i wish you the best in life. For all of you who have gone through similar or are going through difficult times, please know there is always someone who is open ears. You are strong and a beautiful human. (This was such a great episode ❤)

[@xomissy]

thank you Christine for sharing. I thought I was the only one dealing w a toxic mother. But from you opening up I realized we’re a lot alike. Thank you so much for opening up and sharing and giving me the courage ❤️❤️

[@karencalixto6030]

1:22:40 Nick was so considerate here he knows it was a tough question for Christine to answer.

[@05254talialewis]

Social worker here! Just wanna add that for the quiz your attachment style has to do with your relationship with your main caretaker. This can show up in your relationships, but doesn’t exactly change as you move relationship to relationship. Attachment has to do with how you feel about yourself in terms of security in relationships!!

[@yasminelozano4618]

So I took the test and was kinda evenly split between all four did I don’t wrong?

[@05254talialewis]

@@yasminelozano4618 you can definitely have more than 1, this could mean you were taken care of by a lot of people when you were young and have different attachments as a result! Or that your main caretaker was all over the places cause you to 1/2 trust and distrust them 😅

[@ju-qw8nd]

@@yasminelozano4618 there's no wrong way to do it!! as long as you're open and honest with yourself

[@yasminelozano4618]

@@05254talialewis that makes so much sense cause i did grow up with many caretakers

[@yasminelozano4618]

@@ju-qw8nd that makes sense too I’m wanting to know more about me and figure out how I think and retrain some parts

[@aliyaguzman8204]

Nick is always there to console Christine 🥺 I can appreciate that for her

[@nashireillustrationshiatus7602]

We love to see the growth in Maru's character! I won't talk on her behalf but it feels like while staying true to herself she's speaks with a comforting maturity and hosts like a champ. Going out of her way to put in effort to conduct quizzes when she hosts and did a smashing job comforting the women about seeking help if needed.

[@rubytiscareno8588]

I cried towards the end of hearing Christine talk about her and her mother and I truly am thankful for the podcast because sharing your story isn’t easy but it is so appreciated so thank you Christine and everyone else on the pod.

[@ragelledumlao6453]

this was a very wholesome podcast! the way yall took the attachment styles and learning more about each other and your one self is a healthy and start ! also shoutout to Christine for being vulnerable and sharing such an experience that many can face including myself. We truly love you here as a subscriber and thank you for opening up :)

[@abigailtrujillo6238]

Hearing Christine say the exact same words I have once said about my own relationship with my mom made my heart hurt! You are resilient & beautiful! ❤️

[@wowzapop828]

it’s so amazing how christine can still articulate herself so well even when she’s emotional, i aspire to be like her bc i find it so hard to do this

[@marascepovic8215]

“Single or still looking? Fuck idk. What if you’re just like, waiting for someone to bump into you?” NICK SO REAL FOR THAT

[@iamwattpadandrhyslarsentrash]

Devin patting Christine’s back 🥺 I love their friendship so much 1:27:23

[@chelseashane2788]

Maru and Christine thank you for making me feel i’m not alone for going through something like this too. I grw up and learn to understand why and how my parents treat me and my siblings growing up. It’s really heartbreaking learning how you can’t go and get comfort or answer from your parents when they themselves don’t even have answer to it or don’t have any knowledge how to solve some unexpected situations. We comfort ourselves and say “our parents had it more worst than us” whick is fucked up and sad.! Talking about family especially about my mom always makes me “sob” too so christine “ hugs 🫂 “ (you are not alone) I love this podcast.. I cried a lottttt ❤ Thank you Maria.. i love u 😘

[@kygmzzzz]

thank you Christine for being vulnerable with us

[@mjabro925]

Wow. Just wanted to put it out there that what Christine talked about it at the end was the bravest thing I've ever seen. The way she just became so vulnerable and honest is nothing less than amazing. Seeing her stumble her words and having a hard time made her seem so strong. I do want to thank Christine for showing me how powerful being vulnerable can really be.

[@whatislove10]

christine is so strong, i’m so proud of her

[@riannat316]

We love you so much Christine ❤️ I’m so sorry you went through that. You are so strong! Thank you for sharing and opening up🤍

[@Wendy-dm8ut]

1:30:00 the way both nick & sean turned to check on maru when devin passed her the tissue 😢 but Christine we love u & are so proud of u ❤

[@anaj4248]

IKR 😭

[@danielag4950]

Nicks face 43:00 when Maru says "lets pretend me and you were taking nick" 😭

[@janicexiong1130]

I AM LITERALLY IN TEARS WITH THIS PODCAST RN, WOW IT WAS SO POWERFUL. CRISTINE LOVEEE, MY HEART IS WITH YOU ILY SO MUCHHHHH. AND I LOVE ALL OF YOU SMMM!!

[@aeyizs]

aww nick trying to calm maru was so cute 58:36

[@nikkis5701]

christine i cant even remember the last time i cried before this. you are so admirable and i just need you to know sharing your experience has helped me so so so much, i can really see that i am not alone. thank you.

[@hyyhnoke]

I was hoping someone would have an anxious attachment style 😭 I hate having it so much! (nvm I took the quiz and I am disorganized/ fearful-avoidant 💀) and i want to take a moment to appreciate christine and how vulnerable she was this episode! thank you for sharing your experience because i also have immigrant parents that are dismissive of my mental health & have trouble setting boundaries with them. and i also know they were raised differently and try to see it from their perspective but it can be so harmful sometimes.

[@bigpimpinshawty9420]

Omg I just did the test I have it too!!

[@Sharaxstar]

I got anxious preoccupied of that counts 😭😭

[@sophiasalsita]

same i wanted someone to relate to (i got anxious preoccupied)

[@uliseslopez5459]

@@Sharaxstar sameee 😭

[@laishagonzalez145]

definitely needed this! thank you Christine for being able to share that with us, shed some tears for sure.

[@Alexandra-nr5mh]

This was the most healing episode, thank you Christine, thank you everyone for opening up

[@moofp8309]

the group seems way closer than before i love to see people thrive

[@luvs2spuuge]

Seriously one of the best episodes yet guys growing up in an immigrant household I had the same experience with Christine and I cried hard when she was going through the same shit I was.

[@kristynhirao]

christine's story made me sob she's so strong and she's so brave for sharing her story to the world and i hope others feel more comfortable as well

[@valerie7790]

honestly listening to christine's story gave me goosebumps because i experienced the same exact thing and my mom reacted the exact same way to my trauma the way her mom did. it made me so emotional because she was able to articulate the situation in the perfect way. thank you for sharing your experience with me I really needed that; it made me realize I am not alone in my experiences and I am extremely grateful for that

[@ashleyseee]

“they’re still not gonna be you. you have so much you bring to the table that’s different from everyone else. focus on those qualities about yourself & you’ll stop thinking about everyone else.” love what maru said about confidence!!

[@sherlyngutierrez3327]

I like how Nick actually added on to what Christine was talking about at the end. You could tell he appreciated her vulnerability.

[@graciereynolds5625]

the silence after Sage says "nO" when Maru was talking abt the prom circumstance 💀💀

[@raelynhernandez3423]

oh my goodness I’m in a pool of tears. relating so much to Christine and her stories, for her to share this shows such strength. you’re loved girl don’t forget that!

[@americanasian3156]

Nick being nice to Maru??? What kind of podcast is this?

[@kehindeolawuyi1151]

Realizing your parents are just people trying to figure out life too is mad trippy

[@unikaregmi6690]

The fact that Christine had the courage to open up to her parents then proceed to talk about it on camera really shows how courageous she is, I’m crying so hard just thinking about it, she has gone though so much and trying to understand her situation does come across hard when u have never experienced such a thing, She spoke so softly and fluently it brought out the emotions of many including myself, we love you Christine ❤️❤️❤️

[@samanthapanduro]

Sage saying “you would eat that shit up” so aggressively is HILARIOUS

[@natx6979]

i cried with christine ugh sending so many hugs to her and all you guys. i can’t imagine how hard that must’ve been to share something so vulnerable with us. Proud of all you guys for showing such great compassion! These topics are hard to discuss but it’s great for people to hear and if you continue to discuss them it will get easier and should eventually become the norm and not taboo ❤❤❤

[@moriahwhite7312]

Dude I’m so thankful for this podcast. I took the attachment style quiz and realized some things about myself that I really buried away..thank you Maru

[@zoediys1708]

Seans "that's what I'm sayin" after Christine came at him had me laughing 💀

[@rubbysaldivar5449]

Thank you to christine for sharing. I’m a therapist and just listening to this made me think of many others who have similar stories. Adding to It for the person who asked this, also remind yourself that although you are working on giving your mom some grace that it is not your responsibility to teach or heal your mom. You can’t force change so if your parent doesn’t have an interest in bettering themselves to be able to have a healthy relationship then you can decide to put up whatever boundary you find appropriate. Don’t be hard on yourself, some parents just can’t accept that they’re the issue and can’t even began to heal and that’s on their trauma and upbringing not on you. Take care of yourselves ❤

[@MissMIIB]

Watching this ending back after what Maru shared in one of the recent podcasts really makes her small breakdown at the end make so much more sense and my heart breaks for both of these girls and all they’ve been through. Thanks for sharing your experiences ❤

[@Xx1melody1xX]

Amazing job hosting, Maru! Love every single one of you in the Suburb talks gang, extra love to Christine for all she’s been through and still continuing to live life. Would love to one day hear each of you discuss your top favourite podcasts that you’ve done and why

[@faithgiron7030]

Sean being more open is great! Christine always giving the best advice. Maru always making us laugh frrr! Sage making me yawn with his yawing lmao. Devins adhd rubbing off of me. And Nick…. Nickkkkk you’re fine 😏

[@JO-iu1gj]

Im just so proud of our girls and boys in this podcast! Yall are growing to be amazing people and I commend and send so much love to you all because being this vulnerable takes so much courage! To christine you have changed so many peoples lifes and perspectives and have personally given me comfort with what you shared today. Being an immigrant child and an immigrant in general is so hard and i want to thank you for the peace you gave many people including me with your honesty❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹 so much love to you all! love podcasts like these

[@JO-iu1gj]

so so proud of maru you are growing so beautifully and im so happy to witness it and so happy your able to share with us how gorgeous of a person you’re becoming ❤️

[@samuelthe3rd870]

This was my favorite episode so far, hella memorable

[@iyanna_crumpton3746]

Not maru giving you the higher chair, bless her ❤️😂😂😂

[@haniyagarden8955]

I appreciate y’all so much for opening up about mental health. It really makes me feel like I’m not alone and to have that guidance it keeps me going. I love y’all so much🫶🏽

[@audreyalvarado7819]

christine is so real for opening up ab her issues w her mom fr bc i’ve felt the same way about my mom before and i’ve always felt guilty ab it and hated myself for it fr

[@AlyMina_]

why am i on the verge of tears when nick was hugging sean telling him this was a safe space 🥲💛

[@chantalgarcia9448]

16 seconds in and I’m already dying at Devin thinking Marus shirt was a dirty wifebeater💀💀💀💀

[@Mitotess]

Man 1 month until I graduate and i've been watching since 11th grade 😅 Makes my week all the time.

[@bigpimpinshawty9420]

Congrats!!! Wishing you the best after high school ❤❤

[@linda-kq8wq]

sage spacing out at 1:12:35 to 1:13:27 had me rollingggg 😭

[@haleyrandolph9512]

He’s like I’ve heard the story before in detail I’m good lol

[@kelseyueda6707]

thank you christine for sharing. The part about breaking down because you see your mom as someone younger than you who appears helpless really hit home for me. I think that’s the reason why I can’t ever fully resent my mom or my dad because I always try to look at things from their perspective and how they may not know what to do in certain situations because they were never taught that. one positive affirmation: I am patient enough to understand and acknowledge everyone’s perspective other than my own. love yall 🩷

[@ylopez9654]

2:17 LMAOOOO WHY IS NICK LOOKING AT THE RICECAKE LIKE THAT💀

[@mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm7165]

This was a good ass episode. Maru needs to host more

[@elenarico29]

Man, hearing Christine’s story took me back to my little younger self being in that situation. You guys have healed a part of me, thank you so much and thank you Christine❤️‍🩹

[@mimijiji0423]

thank you all for being so vulnerable and honest with us. christine i hope you know how much you’re helping a lot of us. i have chinese parents who immigrated too and i related to your story a lot. thank you and we all love you

[@elidacalles]

Sage and Devin fr share one brain cell 😭

[@moneysignrafa]

I LOVE SUBURB TALKSS

[@thee.stickman__]

SAMEEE

[@MariaPena-ij1bo]

Thank you Christine for this! I shared with my mom about my depression and the SA I experienced when I was younger from a a babysitter. My parents are the exact same as yours Christine. I completely align with everything you said and the fact that my mom also had nothing to say broke me. I wanted support and help but had to realize that I needed to rely on my friends more in that moment. Again thank you for sharing I cried listening to this section, but needed that cry. Thank y’all for the episode

[@Bumblebee_honeycone]

Christine talking about her mother resonated so much with me. I dealt with the same thing with my father and It got so bad that I hated myself and felt like I could never do anything right. I was in a dark space and only just recently have I thought otherwise. I hope all of suburb talks has an amazing future and happy lives because you all deserve it!

[@lindacornelio2032]

Christine, my heart hurts alongside you. Thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your story to help someone else. I wish you well on your healing journey. You are so strong. A great perspective on the pod. As well as a lovely role model I look up to🥺💜

[@oliviaashton7871]

Thank you so much for sharing a story that a lot of us go through Christine, Im proud of you and thank you again.

[@estefannyeromero8923]

When Christine brought up the topic of her and her mom it was enough to make me pause and think if I even wanted to continue watching. I’m glad I did because I’ve never related to anyone more. Going to work on those boundaries because upholding the relationship with my mom is very draining for me but I keep at it because of guilt. Thanks Christine for sharing. Your such a strong woman 🤍

[@shurburt4663]

VERY LONG COMMENT!!! everything christine talked about at the end rang true for me. in between sobs, i really got to listen to her and hear her advice and words. i am korean like christine, and my mom is like most of what she described. my mom grew up christian, grew up with her mom not being as accepting, and everything she has shamed me or congratulated me for was a reflection of what she wanted for herself as a child. since she grew up poorer, she has always weighed her tower of trauma and shame onto me. and also like christine, i’m the oldest. so on top of that i have to set an example for my younger brother. i have made it my goal to counteract some of the very traumatizing things my mom has said to my brother in favor of my different words. i love my brother, so i never want him to feel or develop the trauma and mental health issues i’ve faced, but all those are inevitable. my mom has also been VERY dismissive of mental health and it’s existence in her own kids. she acknowledges that she herself has mental health issues (anxiety,ptsd) and my dad has mental health issues (adhd) but has never been validating for her own kids. my dad is a retired veteran, so he knows how important mental health is. however when i talk to him, he feels obligated to tell my mom. every time. TRIGGER WARNING FOR THESE STORIES, ESPECIALLY #3 STORY: i have a vivid memory of my mom coming into my room one night. it was the start of the new school year right after covid, so i had just come out of a very dark place that i wasn’t able to share with anyone. i would validate my feelings with people online, people i still am friends with today. after she had come into my room to wish me goodnight, i decided that i wanted help, a VERY hard thing to do might i add, abs especially for a child. i, hoping to find a safe place with her, confided in her that i felt like i needed a therapist. i admitted that i had been feeling su1c1dal, and that i had also been feeling anxious and very distracted all covid school year (i went from a A+ student to a B-F student). i was hoping for a positive response. a loving response. a MOTHERLY response. but i got the complete opposite. she bashed me, tearing me apart from the inside out, saying “YOU HAVE ANXIETY? I HAVE ANXIETY. HOW DO U THINK I FELT WHEN YOU STARTED FAILING LAST YEAR.” i was destroyed. i broke down telling her i was sorry, that i didn’t mean it, that i was probably wrong, that she was right. because the mom is always right, right? she went to my dad, MOCKING me and telling me i was crazy. so i believed her. STORYTIME 2: this was right after i had asked my dad about adhd. i know my dad was taking meds for his adhd, and i was wondering if i could see a psychiatrist. i just wanted to confirm that i had nothing “wrong”, and i wanted to address some of the attention problems that i had been having. they were interfering with my ability to properly concentrate, and though i had maintained my good grades, it’s because i had too. or else. i was scared, stressed, and worried. my dad was very accepting and validated my feelings, knowing how i felt because he went through the same thing. we went home, and a few days pass. my mom finds out that i had asked to see someone. she asks me about it, and was fine. after asking a few more times over the year, she decided to take me to the doctors office. the doctor doing my CHECKUP, might i add. i told her my situation, and she said “if you are maintaining grades and doing well i don’t know how you would have adhd.” so my mom, very happy she was right, immediately stops trying to listen or validate any feelings toward this. she was done. then to even now, mentioning adhd to her would trigger her to start yelling at me and saying that the doctor said i don’t have it, so i have to stop whining and shut up. STORYTIME 3: TRIGGER WARNING ⛔️ family friends were over for dinner, and the son, who i’ve known since elementary, was also there. us, my brother and his sister were hanging out, when our siblings decided to play video games. i needed to work on an art project so i told him, and he decided to follow. fast forward, we had been just chatting about life, school, etc. when i go to the bathroom and come back, he’s sitting in my chair, helping my w my art project (i gave him permission). seeing this, i stand next to him. he offers a seat on his lap. i decline saying, “sorry i’m not comfortable with that. i’ll just stand or get a chair.” he refuses, and grabs me by the hips, slamming me on his lap. i was shocked, and he covered my mouth. keep in mind, he’s taller than me, but i’m stronger. however, his strength coupled with my shock gave him leverage. he touched me and as i struggled, i managed to bite him, scratch him as hard as i could, punch him, kick him in the balls, and left him on my floor CRYING. i ran out of my room and past the parents. after they left, i get a text. “don’t tell anyone lol.” i promptly respond with “i will if i have to.” and i had to. i told my mom. my friends moms reaction was more heartfelt than my own mothers. my mom still talks to his mom, and constantly and casually talks about them. i am still a young teen living with my mom. and i understand that these stories make her seem abusive in every way. but you’d be wrong. she’s only abusive in some. i love my mom, she cooks everyday, she cleans everyday, she wakes up at 5-6 every morning to make my brother and i lunch for school. she takes and supports me in my sport (however if i don’t get 1st place i get a beating). she dyes my hair, she gives me facials, she waxes, she does my nails, she takes care of me. all of these things, i am so grateful for. i know she wants me to have everything she didn’t. she wants me to seize every opportunity liek she wanted to as a child. i understand, but i don’t think i can every fully trust her ever. she has cracked my heart in more ways then 1, and i hope we can mend these cracks. i know barely anybody is going to read all of this, but if u did for some reason, please listen to this: you are not alone. you are heard, seen, and loved. please reach out to professionals if u need help. you can search up hotlines and find links to help in the description of some of suburbs videos. i love you, take care. (share an affirmation) ❤️❤️

[@terecitanevarez2905]

Maru telling Sean he's so eterreal when she is as well is so cute

[@sisjbsurmom273]

I really felt it when Christine said she hated her mom when she was younger. I’m assuming that this is around High-school young, where I’m at right now, I’m also a first gen in my family, both my parents immigrated here. I’ve found myself harboring resentment and over all hate towards my father for the past year now. But I love him, so, so much. It feels so wrong at the same time, he’s done some despicable things that I’ve been a witness to, and he knew I knew. I mustered up the guts to tell my mom about what I saw but at this point he’d already gone too far, I felt so fucking guilty for not speaking up earlier when I first saw. I’m at a point in my life where I want my parents to break up so bad. However I know it’s not possible due to finance issues, and keeping up a good face with family. They fight every day, I’m left alone every weekend, and they complain over the money they spent that same weekend. It’s a never ending cycle. My sister ran away from our household long before because she saw how controlling my father was, my dad isn’t her dad so she didn’t harbor the same submissive respect that I did. I’m 16 now, and genuinely don’t know how to go about my feelings. Going off of what Christine said I could be in the wrong? Am I being too harsh? Or too lenient? I’m so lost, and I’m so ashamed to even properly talk about half the issues going on I’m my life.

[@yazzz_p.b9790]

No, I think there is a fine line with your parent or parents being emotionally abusive bc of their generational trauma or trauma in general, but what you mentioned sounds like it goes beyond that line. I’m not saying you're wrong or being too lenient, but that the feeling you are harboring are valid.

[@sisjbsurmom273]

@@yazzz_p.b9790 okay, I’ve never thought about it like that. Thank-you for your perspective.

[@anadiaz4338]

Yours feelings are valid!! If you feel comfortable consider reaching our for professional help/advice. Keeping it all too yourself will only affect you negatively long term. I would recommend speaking out to a counselor at school or a close friend/s. Just make sure to have an outlet, even journaling can help. Please feel free to reach out if you ever need to talk! I hope your situation gets better soon❤❤

[@sisjbsurmom273]

@@anadiaz4338 thank you for your kind words.

[@-_-tania-_-]

honestly hearing Christine talk about how her relationship is/was with her mother really made me realize how my own relationship is with my mother and that boundaries are okay to have with people like our parents. Like its so normal to have boundaries with random people in our lives so it shouldn't be any different with our parents/family. Thank you Christine for being vulnerable with us, it made me have a well needed cry. I never realized that my mother will never fully understand what I went through and that's okay with me. Truly a great podcast guys, thank you!

[@emmasektiaji]

podcast uploads are the highlight of my day 🤭

[@lesleyjelly462]

Real

[@zoeetangg]

when christine started talking abt her mom / parents, it rlly hit me hard. my parents are also immigrants and my mom and i have an interesting relationship . she lost her mom at a young age and grew up with a shitty father with her sisters helping raise her as the youngest of 7. i always thought she was a bad mom until i rlly thought abt it and realized she had a hard time growing up and only did the things she did because that’s all she knew. boundaries are so important because i have divorced parents and i didn’t have any own room until i was 15. thank you so so so much christine for sharing your story. i hope mine and christine’s stories can help everyone grow and how to heal your relationship with your parents. 💗

[@evelinarredulfo2201]

Hey y'all, psych major here! Attachment styles can def be influenced by the type of relationships you have with others (parents, friendships, romantic relationships, etc.) and can def change by changing habits! It definitely takes practice, growth, and LOTS of self-reflection to change habits that come off as automatic after a certain point (like constant doubt). Attatchment styles also apply to you as a person because you virtually have relationships with everyone including yourself! For example, being an dismissive-avoidant person may mean you are that way with others, but it may also mean you are that way towards yourself! (Sorry for the mini lecture lol). But anyways, one of the BEST episodes! Love Suburb Talks sm

[@junoji]

Feel rlly graced by everyone’s vulnerability. Christine really amazes me every time, she’s so well spoken and articulate with how she communicates, even when she’s being vulnerable. Thank you all and Christine for opening up.

[@claudiasan8865]

I got secure style but it said something about having a good relationship w/my parents but actually growing up I would get in trouble for showing my emotions but as an adult our relationship has changed a lot and now they let me express my feelings so the dynamic changed so much which I feel very comfortable with showing my emotions without feeling insecure. It’s insane how much this past two years my attachment style has drastically changed. I’m actually mind blown 🤯. Great podcast btw! Thank you guys 🫶🏼

[@kelseylelei]

listening to this and remembering how much i used to stress about having a date to dances but literally the most fun i had at dances were when i went alone

[@samalovesu]

i am healing beautifully and i’m detached from the negativity that comes toward me everyday.

[@1st_raised98]

Generational trauma is real. I’m Native American and it’s hard, our parents went through a lot like no affection, dismissing mental health issues, etc. all after what happened to the elderly generation in residential schools. All we can do is break the cycle and heal. Along with Christine sharing her story made me cry because that’s exactly what I went through when I told my mom it wasn’t easiest thing to do… I seriously love them for this podcast because its some of our realities.

[@layannax8506]

hearing christine’s story with her mom touched so close to home for me. i’m currently learning to open up more to my mother due to our estranged relationship so hearing her talk about such a heart breaking topic really inspires me to share more and understand my moms side of things. Much love💕 Fire podcast! love y’all>

[@briannamiller8256]

Maru killed this podcast

[@babyk4588]

I wanna thank Christine for being sooo open with us and being able to hold her head so high after everything

[@cheerboy099]

Thank you Christine for being so vulnerable, emotional, and honest with us all. You are extremely strong and brave!!! I have traumatic memories with my caretaker that at 24, I’m not ready to break into. You have helped me realize that it may be time! Love this as group of people

[@zknovia]

Hey, I just wanted you guys to know. Attachment styles are developed during childhood based off how you related to your parents. To truly know your attachment style you have to look at the way you related to your parents. Attachment styles aren’t just about romantic relationships and there really isn’t any way you can change your attachment style immediately just based off the relationship your in. Respect to you guys :)

[@miahtommo9605]

this!!!

[@takari6565]

I love how their personality’s go with the colors they have on

[@manikaur9030]

Idc what people say, I just hope Christine knows how cool it is that she's open enough to talk about situations like this. Like being able to talk about certain situations she's experienced and being able to give her reflection or advice on those topics is really helpful to others. Like in this situation, talking about her expirence with an immigrant mom helped me able to think more and be more open to what she said. So props to Christine for that

[@theorginsofkey7507]

Podcast cures my depression