“Japa” or Stay Back: The Nigerian Dilemma Ft Chidinma & Seyi

On this episode of Tea With Tay, Temisan takes us on a journey through the minds and realities of most young Nigerians eager to leave the country in search of greener pastures a.k.a Japa, as he speaks to Chidinma Onianwa, a Process Safety Inspector in Oil & Gas who's keen on leaving the country. In conjunction with Seyi Alawode, who relocated to the country from the UK to run a tech startup, Tay also looks from the other angle which involves staying back to build jobs and systems to help the state of things. This episode is a powerful and insightful one as Tay, Chidinma and Seyi discuss the many issues that plague Nigeria as a nation and the ultimate dilemma of young people; to Japa or to stay.
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[@stacyhugues1806]

Honestly if you have money Africa is the place to be. I've lived in Canada for so many years but I'm returning as well back to Africa. In 2021 I spent a year in Africa and I was literally the happiest I ever been in years. I wouldn't speak trash of any side, The west has offered me great capital to leverage in my country. But also my country has also offered me great business opportunities than any western company could offer me. So I guess it depends on where you are in life!

[@funmilolaogundiya9218]

Very true. In terms of happiness, Africa is always better than the western countries

[@simba8665]

@@funmilolaogundiya9218 if you have money. If you are broke, nope

[@bolanlesoares2514]

Its human psychology, you gravitate towards what you have less of. They are both right, its the mental freedom. The British girl seeks freedom to live as she wills, the Nigerian girl wants the freedom to live anywhere else.

[@moonlightscare7097]

I can totally relate to Seyi. Living in the UK for me is so depressing. I cannot wait to move back to Nigeria, just trying to gather enough money. I’m honestly exhausted of here

[@chinenyeikeobi4880]

Sending you lots of love and prayers. I pray that you experience joy and peace of mind. God is your help …. UK was depressing for a sibling of mine, we had to ask him to come back home. Most people don’t understand how lonely and exhausting it can be… people are just looking at snow pics as enjoyment.

[@opeoluwaolowe]

I love the fact that they both acknowledged the differences in their realities .

[@acefully4703]

Chidinma’s Comment on lack of meritocracy in Nigeria is spot On

[@francheza1]

First of all, I need Chidinma to tell us her hair vendor. I need those bundles 😍

[@eniolafujah]

This is a great interview, I think Taymesan should invite regular Nigerians that are not making a lot of money as well, I would love to hear their perspective

[@patrickrumbu2902]

This is great! Most content guys have a blind spot to this. They just invite well off people and blanket that as the general reality of things

[@anastasiageorge1279]

@@patrickrumbu2902 actually other nigerian podcasts do it too. I said what I said has done it a lot too

[@patrickrumbu2902]

@@anastasiageorge1279 yeah I ride with them from time to time as well

[@meengmeeng6412]

Very intelligent conversation. However coming from someone that lives in the West and has lived there for over 20 years, I will pick Nigeria EVERYDAY!!!! Nigeria is only 63 years old, let’s stop comparing ourselves to the west!!! We are doing so much better than a lot more third world countries. Lebanese, Chinese, and Indians are buying our economy- investing in our nation and we work for them. Since I was born, “Nigeria has ALWAYS been bad” - since Babaginda, since Abacha; I grew up with the words “Country Hard” and that was 40 years ago. If you ask me Nigeria is so much better than it was 40 years ago. I don’t think people understand the amount of Shootings that happen the US- NO WHERE in the world is perfect; Nigeria has its down sides, however WE AS NIGERIANS need to quit the narrative we push about OUR OWN COUNTRY being a SHIT HOLE!

[@ferdimako]

I hope you don't have western citizenship.

[@abdulidi733]

Great comment. Our preparation to JAPADA back to 9ja for semi retirement is in top gear!!

[@traykunable]

The downs in Nigeria currently outweigh the ups. Maybe it'll change sometime in the future (I'm not holding my breath) but for now Japa if you can.

[@Fusionbtc]

I love that Seyi Babe. Nigeria has really changed Chidinma

[@ehieigbe3929]

We would like to hear from ordinary Nigerians who are not from privileged backgrounds.

[@kkiv1639]

Chidinma is really smart 💯 and i love seyi also . they're both awesome 👏 ❤❤

[@nwankwochinonso1940]

Chidinma sounded really frustrated about Nigeria and to a large extent I can relate.

[@thepanafricanman]

Wow this is a perfect example of British Nigerian woman and Nigerian Nigerian woman. I choose a Britsih Nigerian woman everyday of the week. Attractive and humble. Natural look. Laid back. Self aware. Love it.

[@osaniella]

So first of all, this was beautiful to watch. I loves listening to the points of views from both ladies. And they’re both so beautiful so I enjoyed watching too🤭🤭. Now I completely understand where Chidinma is coming from being a Nigerian that was born and raised here. However, I relate so well to Seyi because as a kid, my family travelled out of the country every summer so I was also very well exposed, I’ve also gotten most of my higher education outside of Nigeria so the exposure was well ingrained. However, I moved back to Nigeria regardless of the struggle and still possessing that strong need to come back and apply what I had learned outside, in my own country. The system is warped and rigged against every Nigerian except the 1%. And yes, a lot of us feel like running away from the country would save us, but the fact is that there really is no place like home. You can leave for 5-50 years to be honest but one day you’ll want to come back to your roots. You’ll want your children to experience their culture and you’ll want to feel like a Nigerian in Nigeria. It’s inevitable. What we’re currently trying to escape is not really Nigeria but the system. In my opinion, the system was created by a handful of people, and sooner than later, these people will die out. Considering the fact that many of us have now become victims of the system, for example, the security men at Chidinma’s estate, it points to the fact that Nigeria’s problems are no longer just a physical problem. We are living in a cycle of perpetual mental trauma, and allow me to say, spiritual confusion. We think that it’s by running away that we will save ourselves but the truth is that you will carry Nigeria to wherever you’re going if you don’t understand that you have already internalized the trauma that Nigeria has caused you. I completely agree with Seyi when she says that she doesn’t want to leave for any reason. I want to marry here, work here, build my family here! Because there will never be anywhere like home. Nigerians are God’s own people and we’re fighting more than a physical war. Our battles are mental and spiritual and need to be tackled from the grassroots up, as well as from the top-down. I get Seyi’s anger at the elites who have the power and influence to make a difference and yet only use it to their advantage, forgetting that one day, their money will not be able to save them when push comes to shove. In summary, my take is that, yes, for now, the exhaustion will probably cause many of us to leave, but in reality, we will all be like Seyi one day and want to come back to our roots. But you can’t do that if you’re not willing to fight for the cultivation of those roots the proper way! The people who have created this system will not live forever, we forget that they’ve lived for as long as Nigeria has been in existence, that’s why their power is still so strong. But what happens when they’re gone? Are we going to choose to perpetuate their system? Or are we going to do it differently? Just my thoughts.🤍✨

[@patrickrumbu2902]

Love love all you said, esp your point on our culture..kids/family structure & all 👏🏿 Gurl! Not you writing such an epistle (like letter of Paul to the Corinthians 😆) to now say in summary; is this playing? 😁 was a good read

[@05phunmie]

But why? Somebody summarise

[@osaniella]

@@patrickrumbu2902 🤭🤭🤭 I summarized for the people who didn’t want to read the whole thing. But thank you for taking time to read my thoughts. I appreciate it🤍✨

[@patrickrumbu2902]

@@osaniella pen pals?

[@fathiaholawuwo1098]

@@osaniellaYou’re such a great writer, coming to read this after a year and I’m so impressed reading through your contribution, I moved to the uk two years ago and it’s safe to say I sacrificed my mental and emotional wellbeing for money. The system abroad is designed to make you work your entire life and live paycheque to paycheque. Now that I’ve conquered poverty to an extent. I’m looking for ways to build WEALTH that’s continuous and find my way back home.

[@faithibiang7527]

With chidinma's job experience. She will definitely get a good paying job abroad. There are so many job vacancies waiting for experienced people.

[@okpegodson1675]

These two ladies are really intelligent

[@angeladelaja]

I think you should host a panel session on this. With more variations for people to identify with. 13 years in Nigeria so far having never lived here before. I somewhat agree with seyi except I didnt have the access or network. I didnt know anyone but I had a technical capacity and a western background that somewhat opened doors.

[@osaniella]

Seyi got so excited when the spiritual talk came in 😂😂

[@reasonnampodcast]

Yeaaa... I don't know why tee didn't go there

[@apriltuoyo]

I didn’t want this video to end

[@adaobiumeze8754]

I absolutely enjoyed this and can relate to Chidinmas point of view

[@marcelesosa9607]

I really enjoyed this as it was quite informative and fun as well. Thank you Tay for this episode. Good luck to both ladies with their plans for the future.

[@amagloria5466]

Loved this episode. Please tag the ladies so we follow them on social media

[@tobitanimowo6697]

Would’ve loved to hear from Seyi more .

[@AderemiAdebowale-kl4ze]

Seyi there's cowrie card for BRT buses in Lagos o. But I like your optimism and your resolve to give back to your country that needs you rather than staying back in a country like UK where they already have it. Nice 👍 one

[@firstladynaija]

I’m with Chidinma on this

[@ezy-e4250]

Chidinma, most of your points are valid, but the challenges abroad are also very much plenty, there are very serious major problems in naija, there are also very harsh challenges for people of color in the abroad, however, some of your points are exaggerated and frankly speaking not serious issues, na wen you go the abroad e go clear to you, not now. Believe me, not now.

[@OlanipekunTobi-cw9lk]

Tay, this episode is lit!!!

[@patrickrumbu2902]

I mean Nigeria is home & a beautiful place (esp If you are financially secured) so it makes perfect sense for people who have made sth out of themselves to come back home.

[@abdulidi733]

True talk woo. Our JAPADA back to 9ja is in the works.

[@patrickrumbu2902]

@@abdulidi733 do that bruvah! We truly love our country. As someone who has plans to make it out there, I equally always think of getting a Nigerian lady even while out there or at least an African lady...for the sake of our shared values.. kids & all.

[@leanolaone6431]

I'm not even from Naija,I'm from South Africa, but trust me when I say the Japa situation is not unique to Naija. I am currently working on my exit plan. It is a lot of ppl who are not politically or socially connected's plans. With our country the crime rate is also a major reason for me wanting to Japa. I would rather battle racism in Australia or one of those countries than live in constant fear. In any case I'm dealing with racism in this country

[@divaferanmi6900]

Africa keeps chasing the beautiful ones away. So sad!!

[@abdulidi733]

Chai do you mean you prefer to face racism Abroad? How was the market with Apartheid from the Boars decades ago in South Africa?

[@leanolaone6431]

@abdul Idi A lot of things were functional under apartheid, roads,power stations,hospitals. But obviously black ppl were subjected to a poor quality of education (bantu education) compared to whites. But things were working,currently we are just surving as nothing is really working,from roads,schools,hospitals,the police force, even the government is not working cos if you have money you can literally get away with anything in South Africa. There is no rule of law basically. It's a nightmare. But yes I would rather experience racism somewhere else. Trust me there is racism in SA,we even make jokes like "in corporate South Africa black multiple degree holders report to white ppl with only a high school certificate",but it's not a joke it's the reality of most black ppl

[@abdulidi733]

@@leanolaone6431 so what good does it do when all the good things you mentioned worked for MUGU Boars Dutch from the Netherlands. Please help us by not celebrating deadliest regime on earth.

[@MotiA.]

Why did you guys cut their stories off na 😢. Would have loved to hear Seyi's part about feeling isolated at work and Chidinma's fear of sudden death in Nigeria. Abeg make una dey leave the guests stories intact ooo. Great interview all in all

[@iyiolaodumosu]

The full coverage is on his podcast on spotify

[@MotiA.]

@@iyiolaodumosu God bless you for this information! Didn't know he had a separate podcast!

[@amakachukwu9113]

Tay this was a very relevant episode and the conversations had brought some incite. However, the editing was not so well done. It left conversations incomplete. For Instance the question you asked about how to Japa, Chidinma had and I believe said more but it was cut off with her not answering a question she already started on

[@patrickrumbu2902]

Seyi ❤

[@hlengiwemasondo2858]

I'm South African I will Japa to Nigeria. There is no way I can be able to live outside of Africa

[@websitekickstarter7093]

This is insighting from two different perspectives. Chindima"s reasons are quite valid. "Sickness is a low hanging fruit. "As far as you are supposed to be first class citizen, you are treated as a second-class citizen to the one that has money. "Insecurity is closer to you than you think. "Classism. In the end, We choose what is best.

[@SucreTojo]

This episode speaks volume Tay 👏🏾

[@damilolaogundipe5225]

Side Thought: I feel lit is hard to be a remote worker living in most major cities in Nigeria. These cities built when people dressed and go to work.

[@AderemiAdebowale-kl4ze]

But Chindinma last words is encouraging. 'If It doesn't work then something bigger is keeping me here' nor be you😂

[@s0fire_]

Tay, I love this:) !

[@tovkeljames9430]

These are extremely privileged kids

[@tarheoghene3516]

Chidinma sounds just like Nigerian designer, Veekee James.

[@mrotokolo404]

I experienced more racism in Nigeria "my country" than in Germany.

[@princessjybabyelema966]

Chidinma spews factssssss. Seyi I hope you will say this in 1 or 2yrs time.

[@ehieigbe3929]

She is cut off from reality because she is from a privileged background.

[@fayannenatural5204]

@@ehieigbe3929 check the full podcast

[@Theguylobar]

I think at this point I Can say it Boils down to your background. Living here is hell and you need a strong network to climb the ladder up. And moving to the Abroad can be exhausting, lonely and at times depressing❤

[@kingsleyrhuada2110]

I sure say na Exxon Mobil Chidinma work before 😊

[@truth57174]

Japa, hussle, use it as leverage and fall back asap.

[@abdulidi733]

Chai fear of sudden “mutuwa” in 9ja. Not sure if Chidinma knows what’s going on here in America. People are being kpai in schools, groceries stores, shopping malls etc. No where is 100 percent safe. Great conversation though.

[@AderemiAdebowale-kl4ze]

What if there's no means or way to japa' no visa, no airplane. I don't understand Nigerians,to me it's bad but we are kind of insatiable. Bad things happen everywhere! Those western countries have been through what we are going thru earlier. They colonised us .they had the computers everything first. We are not second class all the time. Check some western histories,many underprivileged went thru hell and back. Sickness and death happen everywhere, accident happen everywhere! Only God is the source and keeper of life! I was saved from death during pregnancy and delivery here in Nigeria at general hospitals. Each time( 4 times brush with death, 4 cs sections, 2 emergencies, 2 electives)but trust me it was harrowing,coming back to life in the all 4 instances I knew it's beyond doctors ( they tried honestly) was 100% God! If I had been in any west without God who gives life, I don't know if I would have survived. Nigerians even if we must japa', let's talk positive. We are too impatient, dissatisfied and negative about our country and talking about us negatively all the time in every podcast sound and makes things more depressing than they actually are! It is well

[@firstladynaija]

Seyi has another passport so I can understand, if she’s an average Nigerian that is stuck here she go see shege

[@vkvk1473]

Please ask Seyi to give up the other passport and face Naija without the choices that she has. She landed soft so her experiences would be from a different angle.

[@ehieigbe3929]

Thank you!

[@0deraa]

She already said that her reasons are based on the fact that she is sheltered and privileged

[@thepanafricanman]

​@@0deraadont mind them, they dont like to listen.

[@hasgy421]

Should I sell my property to japa? Is it actually worth it

[@lumitune]

Depends on your plan for when you japa. Do you think there is a solid business plan or job or opportunity where you can make back at least your properties worth if not twice or thrice it’s worth? You just have to look inside yourself and see if it’s worth it.

[@hasgy421]

@@lumitune a meant a Canadian student visa As a student

[@awotundeoladayo3894]

Not worth it. If it's a building, put it for rent and refinance. That way, you leave your options open.

[@ehieigbe3929]

If you are doing well back home, no need to japa.

[@tobitanimowo6697]

Don’t do it.

[@Nico-jt4jd]

Seyi was cut off too much in this interview. Really wanted to hear her full perspective.

[@oshinowojumoke2573]

You can find it on his podcast on Spotify

[@s0fire_]

❤❤❤

[@AderemiAdebowale-kl4ze]

Chindinma despite her opportunities is still so so negative . She obviously will be feeling depressed most times with Naija with the way she talks. Giving your kids the best is not until you reach abroad . You get work? Nor be everybody get work for abroad. Nor be every Naija man or woman dey jobless whether self employed or paid employment. If you believe for Naija you go find love good love. Chindinma is perhaps scared she won't get a man who will be as highly paid as her not to talk of more. She has to change her mindset. There's a man for her if she believe in this Naija who can and might probably be making more money legit ' than she is currently . But good luck to her on her japa' expedition. It is well

[@gbengaajetomobi5509]

Person dey earn more than N1m plus quit her Job and talking about opportunities lol... This Chidinma babe is not real kan kan

[@presleyharcourtts3508]

The girl that said she came from the u.k or grew up partly in d u.k should pls keep quiet..she has no clue on what it feels like to totally grow up in 9ja.

[@gbengaajetomobi5509]

@@presleyharcourtts3508 she clearly mentioned that she came from a privileged perspective, didn’t she ? Even as at that she still finds Nigeria “soft” listen to comprehend sir/ma

[@Destroyandrebuild]

@@gbengaajetomobi5509 and Chidinma also admitted that she was earning well, as you have highlighted. How is she not real? And why does Seyi get your jail-free card?

[@morolakemomodu6171]

Chidinma sounds incredibly bitter. I think her circle is part of her problem.

[@JamesJibunma-r5p]

Interesting topic, but Tay you need get some bruised folks that Nigeria has really happened to. Chidinma and Seyi only represent a minority as it pertains to this topic.

[@ehieigbe3929]

Well said man! The conversation is not balanced.

[@KingDamzy]

Chidinma is overly negative and super emotional about Nigeria. Seyi is not confident about her points, she seems to be swaying to and fro.

[@isaacclay218]

Seyi sound like she fake her accent

[@debbs3497]

The audio needs to be worked on please🥹