The DEVASTATING Aftermath of a Toxic Job

[@talisha5863]

Don’t trust anyone at work👎🏽…..the people who smile the biggest and talk the most are diabolical and are waiting for you to do or say something to use against you👹

[@GOTHICMAMBA35]

this

[@mac-ju5ot]

Boy do they make plans

[@OanaTheMeerkat]

Oh, come on! I have the biggest smile in the office, the loudest and funniest. WAHAHAHAHA. But yes, I understand what you mean. As someone who is autistic most jobs are toxic and I've seen a lot of them.

[@Joshdifferent]

💯💯💯💯💯

[@GoldenAngel-]

Some people yes but not everyone

[@amynurss1375]

I worked at an absolute horrible job for over 9 years until I was mercifully fired. I actually thanked my pycho boss for firing me. So glad to see that company tanking all these years later. Glad I do what I do now, and make great money too! If you cry when you drive to work, leave the job!

[@JenniferBrick]

I'm so glad you the universe have you a shove to get out of that place - and into a better opportunity!

[@OanaTheMeerkat]

I had 2 jobs, one after the other, where, after coming home and going to bed, just the thought that tomorrow I'll have to go to the same place, made me cry in my pillow. First job, after 2 weeks I was fired. The second job, after 2 months I was fired (this one, my boss accused me of stealing. No I did not!!!).

[@GoldenAngel-]

Hope you doing better now it their loss not yours! ❤

[@whattheflimflam]

I knew I had to get out when I started fantasizing about being in a car accident or getting hurt so I wouldn't have to go to work.

[@CT97559]

Also if you don’t even want to get out of the bed to go to work because you’re so miserable that’s a sign to leave. That was me for 2 years. I finally left and am now at a job that’s 10x better!

[@jenmck8146]

Seeing a lot of parallels between having a toxic job and having had a toxic parent - they both have had a lot of the same effects, at least for me.

[@jenmck8146]

@@kimkaragiannis848 I think you're on to something ❤

[@Marella2024]

Yes, absolutely. I have seen the correlation as well.

[@Blessed1283]

Yes, same here.

[@Jennifer-my5dm]

My father was very mentally abusive towards me, which could be one of the reasons why I thought I deserved to be bullied and gaslighted on the job instead of deserving so much better. He had me convinced I was a loser who would never amount to anything, and didn't deserve good things in my life.

[@JeffCaplan313]

Lots of times, parents are toxic to their kids because their bosses are toxic to them. Society is one giant toxic ponzi scheme.

[@bunniewood]

If you’re in a toxic job I recommend saving as much money as you can. I ALWAYS have 3 months expenses saved so I can leave a job as soon as I realise it’s toxic. (I live in Australia so it doesn’t take over 6 months to get a job like America and my healthcare isn’t connected to my job and here you aren’t judged if you have a gap in your resume)

[@JenniferBrick]

Health insurance is a big deal here in the US. I'll never get used to it (I'm originally Canadian)

[@bunniewood]

Terrifying to have your health directly linked to your employer. Not too late to move back?😅

[@OanaTheMeerkat]

What kind of job do you do? Or at least can you tell me the domain?

[@Jennifer-my5dm]

Even though my current job isn't toxic, I've had plenty of toxic jobs in my life to give me major trauma for several life times. That's why I have so much money saved up. You just never know.

[@JenniferBrick]

@@bunniewood since I exited corporate to found my own company, my health insurance is dependent on my husband's job (no pressure on him lol)

[@eclipsedeucy1144]

Why can't people do their jobs ,and go home. Leave the rest out of it.

[@RiverSprite30]

You are not wrong. I used to work in an extremely toxic work environment, for a little over a decade. It completely affected how I saw the world and people around me, when I was off, I was so emotionally exhausted, I could not do anything but sit in my room. It kind of hurt my faith in mankind, to be honest. But I'm recovering. The customers were so bad, I was verbally abused on a daily basis, and I had been working there for so many years, I was starting to bump into regular clients out in the street, or at the grocery store, and they would stare at me and give me bad looks, just because I was a receptionist for very demanding chiropractor who they couldn't get an appointment with. Not my fault. But being in that environment, with that dynamic, and so many people in our town passing through his office, it made me not even want to leave my house. It sounds silly, as an adult, but when you spend 50 hours a week at a particular company, that is psychologically abusive, for over 10 years, it does affect your personality.

[@marciamartins1992]

In a small town it can be worse. 1. It's not like you can just get another job. 2. Uprooting is extremely hard if you have a family. 3. The more dependants you have, the more you'll tolerate. 4. Human resources is a joke.

[@carriebell3566]

Any time you spend in a toxic environment of any kind it affects your personality.

[@LeviBroflovski]

Things are so toxic today that it makes more sense to plan your exit strategy BEFORE you even think about a future with any given company.

[@helenarichard]

So true! I always left toxic jobs asap. I was only getting week contracts anyway so I never felt safe anyway. I always had to save tons of money. Still unemployed after a mediocre last job now with at least one shitty coworkers but it was "ok". Stay away from legal and bookkeeping. Stupid shitty people. Book keeper didn't even know what 3x8 was and I told her lol. This is the type of people who tell me what to do lol. I am glad it was a temp. Anyway, been unemployed for a year again now.

[@Netboxviewer]

I am starting an ecommerce store jobs arent worth it anymore

[@dennisreynolds9202]

I left my 8 year job for a better paying salary. Find out they lie to me.also they made false statements and got me fire. I want to sue. But can't even find a lawyer.

[@chelseasmith9242]

This! I also want to point out that, the biggest reason that I've seen why companies and businesses are not only hurting for good help and good employees these days, aside from our job market and economy struggling, is because of a toxic work environment, no matter who within the environment is toxic. All it takes is just one person to make it miserable for everyone else, just one person.

[@JenniferBrick]

One bag apple spoils the bunch 💯

[@chelseasmith9242]

​@@JenniferBrick yes it does and it can take months to years, to heal from and recover from a toxic workplace. That trauma no matter how much counseling and therapy one might have after leaving that awful environment, it stays with you for the rest of your life, especially when it's been going on for months to years at the time.

[@chelseasmith9242]

​​@@JenniferBrickI was in the U.S. Army 2011-2014. After the Army and after finishing my Associates of Science degree in May of 2019 and I'm not yet done with my schooling and education. Anyways, I worked a seasonal job at Petco, November of 2021 thru late January of 2022. Then six months later on July of 2022 thru August of 2023, I worked as a secretarial receptionist at a beauty, in which my boss at the time, retired from her 30+ years career in permanent cosmetics shortly after I completed my time when I worked for her. Since August 13, 2024, I've been a Substitute Teacher at the High School not too far from my house. I've worked retail and certain jobs similar to retail, and retail is not at all fun and it's better than not having a job sometimes when you are limited on options. Oh and I totally agree with you that, coworkers aren't your friends, and I've tried to be friends with former coworkers and it worked for several months or several years depending on how long the post work friendship at the time lasted, but we've gone our own separate ways and have moved on without keeping in touch. As much as I miss those people sometimes, life goes on and that just proves that coworkers and former coworkers are not our friends.

[@JenniferBrick]

@@chelseasmith9242 not all therapists and counsellors are trauma-informed. While their training and education provide the basics, processing workplace trauma (and trauma in general) requires trauma-informed professionals. Look for therapists who have advanced training; it's important to note here there is not necessarily a 'trauma-informed certification' while there are approaches that certify qualifying practitioners (these usually require specific course work, supervised practice, and general practice hours). I suggest this beyond therapists and counselors to get over workplace trauma; if you choose to work with career coaches, healers, etc, they *need* to have advanced training and experience. I say this because the risk of unintentional harm is so great when unresolved trauma is present.

[@bekf2240]

Nothing a good voodoo doll can't solve. Seriously.

[@redcherryblossomgrowing9901]

My workplace is toxic. The management has favoritism with those people who grew up in their chaotic dysfunctional families who only like to create chaos at work. They seek chaos, they enjoy chaos, without chaos or hostility, life is too boring to them. Peace is abnormal to their brains. They get so excited and delighted among the chaos they created.

[@annoif8]

Very well said

[@marciamartins1992]

Yes and nepotism of all sorts. Sometimes it's not about your skills, it's about your connections.

[@user-jz6mu]

After I left my toxic work place I received a call from my ex bosses wife confirming if he indeed was dating on of my ex colleagues. I said yes he was and she showed me tons if evidence. Met my ex boss and he said I didnt have the right to talk to his wife. Said she had no right to call me. Anyways he has told all my ex colleagues to stop talking to me or they will lose their jobs. I endured that mans disrespect for 3 years and im the one who he is going around painting as toxic. Im so hurt😢

[@brianyoon7612]

Been through this many times. Live your life/Succeed and be better than them both professionally and financially. That is the best revenge.

[@CJandEllie]

I began with a cheerful demeanor and smiling eyes. Then the years worked on me. And now people comment on how gloomy I look. I smile sometimes but my eyes don't lie.

[@deadandburied7626]

That started with school for me. 😢

[@sakuragyoza]

It hurts to remember how earnest, energetic, and enthusiastic I was and how that was wasted on an abusive workplace.

[@J.QNobody]

It's simply PTSD.

[@craigd8177]

Agree. Mine hung around for a year.

[@rachelm9350]

yep its PTSD!!!!

[@BOSSDONMAN]

Most jobs in America are toxic. A toxic job is just a job in America.

[@nathanthompson8728]

@@craigd8177it’s been 7 months for me and wondering why do I still think about that awful place

[@nervousbreakdown711]

It is, but unfortunately a lot of people are going to laugh off the idea that you can get PTSD from a terrible job environment. This is softening it so people are more open to hearing the information

[@colejohnson]

Your last point on energy is so on point. It doesn’t matter how much I rest during the day or sleep at night, the overall feeling I experience most of the time is anxiety mixed with exhaustion. I’m envisioning a battery starting a day at say 50% and then needing to go and DO all day when truly a 100% charge is required to properly function.

[@JenniferBrick]

The fatigue is so real and so intense; it's emotionally, cognitively, and even physically draining.

[@luvyatubers]

Got a new boss mansplaining right off the bat that he was told to run the place however he wants to and for us not to contact his boss. Don't be a tyrant and I won't

[@CJandEllie]

You articulated how I feel every day

[@TheKrazeeLadee]

I used to work for a toxic boss who took advantage of my already low self esteem and completely broke it, making me feel like a worthless human being who can't do anything right. After quitting, it took months to climb out of a deep depression that resulted from the power harrassment and constant talking down to. A month after I started my current job, I received a compliment from the CEO and you know what? I cried. I was so un-used to being appreciated that receiving a simple compliment got me to break down in tears. It's like I've left an abusive relationship and got into a healthy one. And it made me angry. All this time, I'd thought I was just that bad at my previous job and I was the problem. But as time went by, I realized what a scumbag my previous boss really was. I've been happily doing my current job for more than 3 years now and I fully intend to stay where I am. I love my job, I have fun colleagues and my boss is a very kind person.

[@calinoire]

Ughh we should be able to sue for mental health issues I definitely have PTSD

[@elaineateoate1020]

💯

[@Jennifer-my5dm]

Years ago, I was gaslighted by both my immediate boss and the head of HR at what I thought was my dream job. I was working as a copywriter for a children's website. My work was constantly belittled. I was told that nobody in the office liked me. Any mistake I made was totally magnified. I was pretty much forced out of this job. And though both the website and the company no longer exists, I still have deep rooted trauma do to what I went through.

[@Jennifer-my5dm]

@@Create_SunShine And what kills me is how these gaslighters, these toxic bosses get away with such horrible behavior. My ex-boss is doing great. Nothing seems to stick to her.

[@youngandrestlessjean3634]

Same. Same. Same. My last manager was a Regina George basically. She belittled me every chance she got. She even snapped her fingers at me to hurry up when I was taking too long helping this one autistic customer. She also took a 2 week hiatus when we were already very short staffed. I had to step in even though i had no manager training and got berated by a few customers. That was my breaking point. I already have husband with cancer and small children. I reached out to her higher up and got nothing. Very corrupt company. Luckily I no longer work in that toxic hell scape.

[@marciamartins1992]

85% of all the managers I've worked with seemed to have some sort of psychological issue. Lack of basic human skills seemed to be a prerequisit of their job description. And yea they all get away with it....until you say quit!

[@Iquey]

I hope you can heal and make work that children or youth will enjoy! Don't let toxic ppl silence you.

[@Himmiefan]

Similar thing happened to me. A narcissistic VP didn't like me because I didn't kiss his a** like others, and he and those he put on a payroll system implementation team ganged up on me and finally let me go. One of the HR reps totally said that they had done me "dirty" since my record up to then had been excellent. The implementation failed over and over until they finally got it going, replaced many on the team, and at least two of the big trouble-makers have had very big issues on their positions afterwards (karma). As for me, I ended up working for a great university and have had only good things since then.

[@TezukaKohei]

The problem with this video is 90% of jobs are now toxic. So I actually would not recommend lowering your guard. This problem isn't really solvable at the individual level. Our society is falling apart.

[@RachelShainfeld]

Thank you for saying this!! The work culture nowadays is all about exploiting employees and paying them as little as possible.

[@amylyn722]

The big boss may not be toxic, but the mid management may be because they don't know how to get over their previous toxic workplace! It's a never-ending cycle😢

[@mdesnica]

That is caused by greed. JUst 15 years ago it was very doable to work, even if employment was "wage slavery" back then too. But now its even worse: Wage slavery + 3rd class bosses + more stress to produce and take shortcuts.

[@McFluff88]

Completely agree

[@NeighborhoodWatchMann]

I felt a sigh of relief whenever I read your comment. It makes me happy to know that people can see the forest from the trees. And if I was to use that same analogy. Our trees are disappearing like mad!

[@Sophwaffles]

This!! Last month I got fired from my trainee dental nurse position, simply because I wasn’t good enough. It was a blessing in disguise! I was barely at the place a month and was told to basically learn quicker, the practice manager even told me to; ‘just pretend to be someone else if you have to, don’t be Sophie’… This is when I knew I had to get out. They saved me the bother and did it for me, but I have been left with awful anxiety, the feeling of not being good enough and the feeling of failure at any future job I may have.🙃

[@maryk446]

Some companies don't really want to train people. They act annoyed that new hirees can't be productive right away. I'm sure there is nothing wrong with you, Sophie. Wishing you the best.

[@endingsarentnear]

i experienced the same thing in retail. “be anyone but katya please, you are too autistic to tolerate”. your comment nearly brought me to tears i empathise so much with your memory.

[@Sophwaffles]

Thank you for your replies and kind words! It makes me sad you guys have experienced the same thing!😢 I currently have a temp job, which is actually quite lovely, however - that devil on my shoulder is telling me I’m no good at it, so I’m still actually struggling with anxiety!🥲

[@endingsarentnear]

@@Sophwaffles the ‘devil’ of insecurity speaks in oppositions remember this. you are so emotionally intelligent that you are too good for any corporation that could exist because you know damn well that a corporation will never fulfil your potential. grab a word document and start writing a story, write your own future while you are ‘stuck working’ to save money to fulfil your intelligence. i am doing this and the progress is insane even though i’m still relatively in the start. give to society in a way that only sophie can teach. sophie you, not any other person sharing your name. 1 year of doing what ONLY YOU can do in this world, reverses 2 decades of trauma, from my own experience. this is how powerful you truly are. you are currently working because you are saving money. you are focused on saving money because money gives you confidence in exercising your potential. (and yes, spending money on nourishing food and travel IS SAVING MONEY, because health is wealth always keep this in mind).

[@Hiker2110]

I'm a little over 2 years of leaving a toxic job. I work for a great company now, but I still feel the effects from my last job. Today, I was invited to a meeting to celebrate top performers at my employer's regional location this year. I had to reach out to my manager to ask if it was a prank. I'm not saying that to humble brag at all, that's literally my gut instinct when I'm positively recognized at work.

[@A-_B956]

I worked in a place where you had to pretend to be sad or have low self-esteem because if you showed an ounce of happiness or confidence, someone would ruin your day. I remember one of them saying, "If someone is too confident, I do something to break it"

[@Apricot90]

My life as a teacher.

[@helenarichard]

I had about 4 toxic jobs. This had me changing jobs so much. Always on the dole. I ended up so depressed from the way they ended it, that at one point I didn't see a point to continue. But I found my strength and kept looking for a normal work place. Started writing a book about toxic jobs to give it a place. Joined the antiwork movement to find out more stories. Started saving a lot so I dont have to accept any job quickly. Currently doing an unpaid internship at a small publisher and I feel so much better than in a "well paid" toxic job. Dont these employers know that now definitely with inflation, their jobs just aren't worth it anymore?

[@JenniferBrick]

Saving funds to find the right next step is a power move. I wish everyone could do this. That said, while I have a lot of philosophical alignment with the antiwork movement's anti-capitalist ethos and de-centering work from personal identity - a lot of the discussion I see are centered on trauma validation and normalization of trauma responses which cause active and ongoing harm. Instead of dealing with one's own trauma, most people externalize their experience; they analyze and diagnose their ex-toxic coworkers and managers with personality disorders, listen to other stories to validate their own experience, and also to provoke rage instead of processing the complex emotions workplace trauma evokes. I want to see more healing in the world which is why my content centers on it. Inflation is largely driven by corporate greed; price gouging, stock bybacks, inflated valuations in the private market. The top 1% are not being harmed by inflation - they are getting richer from it.

[@helenarichard]

​@@JenniferBrick Personally I have found it helpful to realize that many employers suffer from mental illnesses. Some of my bosses had schizophrenia and narcissism. It also helped to know I was not alone, instead, find out there are thousands of similar situations daily. It really changed my perspective and gave me personal strength. I did stop reading the subreddit of antiwork and started to just work on myself and look for a good job rather than talk about the past toxic ones. At some point you gotta move on.

[@marciamartins1992]

Saving funds, lol I grew up on that mentality. My parents were immigrants, I was supposed to have it better. They saw me comming, and were prepared at every turn. RR especially did a number on the society, they have been keeping their foot on wages for a long time now. Be prepared to share living spaces in tight quarters. Private transportation is a dream. You will never eat steak and lobster. Ok

[@newbeginnings4933]

@@JenniferBrick But in order to address and heal trauma one must first learn to recognize it and one of humans' primary responses to living and trying to make sense of something traumatic is to look for support, mirroring and validation from people who have also experienced that kind of trauma. So I don't really understand your point. Of course it's not enough to be in a rage state, but it certainly doesn't help to bottle it all up and jump straight to the healing part. Externalising pain and expressing it instead of letting it rot inside is paramount in being able to start the grieving process, and then healing. The only is through. And that goes for all sorts of trauma, including the one that was experienced in the workplace.

[@GeorgianaOnline]

Dear lord. I feel so seen right now. I needed this, like, decades ago. Thank you for this video.

[@rhern845]

I quit my job yesterday. My anxiety doubled since working there. This morning I shot awake and couldn't breathe cause I thought I had to go still.

[@Xokzu]

Way to call out how I feel BESTIE. I was called an "energy vampire" by HR at work for being run down and irritable by the drastic increase of work at my last job without pay increases. I ended up taking medical leave for two months, consisting of a lot of interventions for treatment resistant depression. Then I left that job, and they are in shambles.

[@Robynbyrd100]

I currently work in a toxic job environment, and all I do is ignore everyone like they're not even there. If they ask me a question, I don't answer. I don't even make eye contact with them. You can threaten to kill someone and management won't even care. I only work around those who respect me instead of dehumanizing me. It works!

[@CharlesHippe]

I put in my 2 weeks this past Monday. The office life is just not for me. I was self-employed at a business for 21 years and basically worked for myself. Now, I am focused on starting my own business. The dream is to be my own boss. I may never be rich, but I'll be happy.

[@rhythmandblues_alibi]

I am hoping to start my own business too. I hope it will free me. I want to find a part time job to do on the side, but I will be able to quit and find something else if it turns out to be another toxic workplace, because I wont be 100% dependent on it.

[@bradyshannon8452]

My life was basically destroyed by this...I can never go back!!

[@CT97559]

I still have trauma from my toxic job. It definitely has affected me at my new job. I over communicate, and go above and beyond. I’ve also noticed that I’m triggered by certain words when I hear them such as. “I just wanted to chat or check in with you.” I also can’t stand employee satisfaction surveys because of all the mean and nasty comments people would say since the surveys at my last job were always anonymous. I’m definitely happy where I am now, and am taking it one day at a time.

[@ssgg23]

Unfortunately I think most workplaces have some level of toxicity these days

[@tinywalnut6337]

I'm currently in an extremely toxic work environment. My therapist has even told me to get the f*ck out. The irony is that, by pushing me into therapy, I've decided to change careers and go into counseling. Thanks, evil boss!

[@schoolneverteach]

Career PTSD is real omigawd!!!

[@schoolneverteach]

It was going well until I made a mistake-- during the process, not in the final delivery-- and colleagues who r needed to contribute to the recovery of the error, started protesting. Bystanders started hearing and spreading stories. It just spiraled downwards from then on...

[@kausha7135]

A toxic job costed me an opportunity with another. In the interview, I was asked how I'd handle a disagreement with a manager. I said I'd escalate it to their boss or HR. At the time, that felt like a normal answer to give because I was spending every other week with HR trying to get them to do something about my boss. She openly stated she hates young women (my demographic at the time), ripped the phone or computer mouse out of my hand multiple times because I wasn't listening to her discipline (name-call) me, inappropriately touched several men working under her, and even called me a whore. To me, this was so normal, I didn't realize a disagreement with a manager is usually something benign like the direction to take a project in or which client to pursue.

[@DaughterofDiogenes]

I just resigned two days ago and I feel like I was in a car accident. I’m just sitting here numb and stunned. I was a teacher and I’ve never in my life been treated so poorly. I could not wrap my head around what was happening. Then when other people in the building start asking me why they keep doing what they are doing and telling me it’s on purpose I just had to walk away. It’s like so insane. I loved my students…I can’t wrap my head around it. Teachers who saw me work with my students said I was an amazing teacher. The parents, students and all my support teachers loved me and always said positive things. But I started to notice my grade level team started to ice me out when one of them came back from family leave. Within one week of her return I suddenly had admin in my room every day. Then they moved me to a grade I’m not familiar with and filled my room with the worst students from each class. All of this was confirmed by other people in the building. It became clear to me that they wanted me to quit so I did. I have just never experienced anything like this before in my life. And we are in a huge teacher shortage!! They wanted me to scream and yell at the kids. Write them up and call home. That’s not how I run my room. It became so toxic and painful to be there. They kept coming into my room and screaming at the kids and me.

[@DimaRakesah]

I had a job I loved that was ruined by a new manager coming in. She micro managed, told me to do one thing then asked me why I was doing it later like she hadn't told me to do it and I was stupid, would complain about me to the upper management when I wasn't around then be all buddy buddy and nice to me to my face. She would give me tons of work to do, then ask my why I was staying late and tell me to go home like she was doing me a favor, but the workload never eased up. I was so stressed and frustrated. I was on edge all the time, angry, would burst into tears out of pure frustration. It really f'd with my mental and physical health. It's been years but I feel like I never fully recovered.

[@bryanmiller8604]

I think another dynamic to address especially in service related, & retail jobs is the psychological effects of toxic customer behavior that oftentimes isn’t a consideration, or casually swept into the rug as “business as usual practices” resulting in not just workplace trauma, but to an extent a potential for the individual worker to grow antisocial, & disenfranchised behaviors, along with depression, & anxieties about interactions with people in general both inside, & outside of the workplace environment as these customers are akin to bullies who never face any consequences for their abusive actions, & behaviors, & there really isn’t any company resources to my knowledge that address these issues or offer decompression, & de-stressing techniques to their employees. The employee is merely expected to shut it off, & continue working like an emotionless automaton with happy smile on their face, & mentally compartmentalize these abuse which ultimately leads to behaviors of repression, & the potential inability to process trauma in a healthy, & safe manner, or environment.

[@ivoryjohnson4662]

Jennifer; I went through a civilian job that gave me PTSD ( mental rape) (apologies to those that have been assaulted) This individual looked for ways to isolate and brutalize me. I didn’t know until later . I thought some of the experiences I had in the military were bad. You are helping me so much

[@grumpyschnauzer]

When I went for my first interview the "boss" or "boss under the boss" was gossiping about other workers who weren't in the room in front of me. I knew it was a red flag but I really needed a job. Sure enough, after getting hired she'd made a huge speech at the holiday party about being a family and creating trust. She also mentioned to me that she was practicing trusting others. These were 2 more red flags and I decided I needed to leave the job. Last straw, was when she said the "boss" doesn't think I fit in there. I interacted with him for like 10% of my time there and mostly interacted with her. Weird that their whole spiel was the business was formed out of the boss being rejected from his job in the past and he created this company where people are accepted. MIXED MESSAGES is another red flag. Weird that at some point she mentioned that there is no hierarchy and we are all on the same level. Yet she's also the one judging if you fit in and the fact that she's able to decide there is no hierarchy shows that INDEED THERE IS a hierarchy.

[@jessicah3782]

I realized a coworker who appeared super nice and down to earth would have temper issues and blow up on people. or maybe she developed them idk all i know is im thankful shes not in a position of power and i am not her first victim. at first i was uncomfortable going to work after i realized she was targeting me but then i also soon realized everyone lowkey already knows about her so its like she can do or say what she wants but i can carry on as normal. obviously i dont casual try to chat w her anymore but yeah i already regret she knows anything about me. she wanted to know so much about me when we first met. lile my aunt says when you start a new job BE QUIET and don't share personal info.... you don't yet know who is crazy or toxic.

[@rturney6376]

❤❤❤

[@AmyChoy87]

I notice these symptoms still a month after parting with the toxic workplace. I am working through your guidebook now, wow I realize after 1 month of parting ways there are still so much bubbling anger and PTSJ. When I finally journal it I realize how toxic it has been and no wonder it takes time. I also realize the person i was working with's value completely misaligned with mine . I am very eager to break out of the toxic job cycle (even if its often in our industry)

[@JenniferBrick]

I'm so glad the Get Over Your Toxic Job Guidebook is helping you, and that you didn't delay and started unpacking your toxic job bags! You should be getting some emails from me with tips to work through it - please keep me posted on how you're doing (just reply to any of those emails!)

[@AmyChoy87]

@@JenniferBrick Yes i did most of it , and i realize the misaligned value ,and it prompted a list of self talks - rewiring in the belief change exercise. Today I woke up feeling empowered and assertive, and much more aware of any old story talk....am going to work on the restoration part tomorrow =) Will email ~~

[@redcherryblossomgrowing9901]

I don't trust anyone in the workplace anymore. One of my coworkers looks like a decent person, however, I discovered that she is very skilled at speaking with different people according to what they want to hear. And recently I discovered that she spoke very differently in front of other people than she spoke with me privately. That threw me out of trust. I then concluded that she is dancing between different parties in the office politics. She is subtle.

[@T00124]

I understand! I am getting that a kind-hearted 57-year-old woman who I work with may be projecting on me because she’s given up hope. I work at a “high-end” grocery store with the initials WF. I am sure you can figure out which one, and I am embarrassed to say I work there, even more so since they are in an affluent suburb and have all this training on bullying, harassment, sexual misconduct, food safety, etc., but I’ve witnessed it or been a victim and it was like pulling teeth to get management to do the bare minimum about it. As sweet as she is, cut me short and started talking about how she lost her business and “that’s just how it is”, when I replied to a statement of hers about her being frustrated at work. I told her I worked so hard to get away from a toxic environment and moved up the later, then slid back down 😂. Keep in mind, we have had to communicate on procedures and how to get clarification, change things, or do something about our safety, so it’s not like we talked about things that were too personal. I was surprised she responded that way; she wasn’t mean, it was just something for me to remember, especially when we are preparing for a busy season (the holidays) and I know it’s going to get more chaotic. I still have plans to get a career in the near future.

[@CJandEllie]

I have a coworker like this. When you meet her she seems to be the good person. The nice one. And she is, we get along. But she knows the game. She is slippery. She smiles in your face and easily tells another person, very NICELY, how much she dislikes you. The phony smiles, the practiced hellos, the endless gossip...i have come to hate working

[@francesbernard2445]

People like that tend to be subtle only at first.

[@elaineateoate1020]

Ya. I think people enjoy or at least can tolerate the actual work they do. What makes most hate going to work is unrealistic and unnecessary deadlines, the cut throat nature of your coworkers trying to get ahead or stay employed, virtual signaling of coworkers in regards to constantly working long hours ( putting self and family last) , purposefully withholding info to get job done. Of course these days, there's always the threat of this paycheck being your last.

[@Mosdefinitelyable]

Lowers your confidence, your passion, and being used to functional teams. NOT GOOD!

[@rachelm9350]

I left a toxic job after a year, but I should have left after day 1 due to how I was treated the first day... eventually I left after having my tires slashed, a severe allergic stress reaction, and finally another manager died at their desk under the age of 50...that is what convinced me I couldn't stay... though I ended up with PSTD, severe debilitating depression, and panic attacks. If a job is toxic again I leave I'm not getting bullied by some prick ever again! I've had two other toxic bosses and immediately planned my exit. I know toxic now when I see it; but its always a gamble who your boss will be.

[@malvavisco10]

Oh you’re right! And I think much of work culture in general is toxic, but it’s a whole other thing if you’re constantly disrespected and micromanaged. We get treated with so much more trust and respect at my current job. Like you can take your break whenever you want, and no one will ever micromanage you about what you’re doing moment to moment. Initially I found myself a bit shellshocked and defensive because of my previous job, though. I realized after a while it’s not like that anymore. It was all down to a jerk boss and a very controlling management structure

[@dodongai]

I was the best worker and got ask to go, it was pretty traumatic (wait that's an understatement). I just give it to God and karma to handle mean, toxic and bad manager. I don't understand why some people are so nasty, honesty.

[@T16R0N]

Find me any job that is not toxic. Modern corporate world can't function otherwise. So, effectively, any job is toxic by its nature of enforced labor. Saving money is a good idea, but will not help. With all those lay offs it is already 10 months I can't find any work. Like ANY work. There is always some useful idiot who is ready to work for food and bare any toxic behavior from the employer.

[@christinenelson5017]

Oh my gosh. 6 years later, this is me. Even after having two great jobs after I can’t stop thinking about it.

[@cpa889900]

My last 4 jobs were toxic. I finally have a good job but I can't enjoyed it because I'm so worried and scared that it will change. I knew that I was damaged from my previous job experiences but I didn't expect it to affect me long term. I have lost all confidence in my abilities and I am always fearful of being fired. The stress and anxiety is overwhelming.

[@deadandburied7626]

I am retired, it took at least 2 years to detox. Driving past the office, and longer bathroom visits at home can still grit my teeth, consciously or subconsciously. 😢

[@melody7779]

Hi Jennifer, I just subscribed to your channel. I love your positive attitude and knowledge. It's time for my performance review in corporate banking and I wanted to do an awesome self-evaluation. Your videos from 4 to 5 years ago popped up in my search and has helped me as I've watched this morning and taking notes. Much love from Charlotte, NC.

[@JenniferBrick]

Sending positive vibes for your perf!

[@Someone-mt2jv]

I work at a senior center (not a nursing home). Not only is management terrible but contrary to what most people think, old people can be very nasty.

[@davidellis5141]

Remember the advice from the 70's R&B hit 🎶 Smiling Faces , Smiling Faces , They Lie , They Don't Tell The Truth ! 🎶 Beware ⚠️

[@beatricesiaw8776]

Undisputed truth band! I remember...

[@davidellis5141]

@beatricesiaw8776 Can You Dig It ! 👍

[@maryk446]

I remember it. It was always one of my favorite songs. It also claims that your enemy can't do you harm because you know where he's coming from. And that "a smile is just a frown turned upside down."

[@angelasylvain2476]

After a leadership change on my team I found myself being singularly targeted by the new boss for bullying behavior. The thing that save me was the overwhelming rallying of support, protection, and validation I received from everyone around me - people on my team and people outside of my team that I thought didn’t even know I existed. I’m still trying to get out of this toxic situation, but I feel blown away with gratitude for the people around me.

[@cateclism316]

I was let go from a toxic job ten years ago. I finally am getting past it, but it's definitely not easy. I was in a position that was way over my head, and despite my best efforts, I could never get up to the level they demanded.

[@Patrice11300]

Great info. I wish I had seen this years ago. All my nursing jobs were toxic with many toxic bosses and co-workers. Taking care of patients was rewarding and I was happy to help them but it was not all, but enough employees that stirred the pot and toxic bosses that always made matters worse.

[@MVK_GS]

This is all good advice. I appreciate that she begins by defining what a toxic job truly is. Not liking your boss does not necessarily mean you are in a toxic job.

[@rturney6376]

You know isn’t toxic? My dog 🐶 😊❤ If you want a friend in Management, get a dog 🐶

[@omararturoramirez5262]

I worked as attendant in public transportation and hell it was toxic! Not only the vast majority of passengers were a walking entitled nightmare, but also a lot of coworkers were absolutely horrible persons. Backstabbing, disrespectful, gossiping, nosy, aggressive and unbearable. I still have awful dreams I’m still working at that nut house. PTSD from toxic workplaces is real. I’m hyper vigilant and I don’t trust anyone.

[@francesbernard2445]

Throughout my life I have had to take public transit often. Sometimes I was forced to witness bus drivers being treated badly too. Like when one angry young man who broke the glass door right next to the bus driver while he was feeling angry about bus driver having left the curb before he could board his bus. Another time a bus driver confided in me that during COVID-19 a passenger spit on him when he told him that he would have to leave the bus because he was wearing no COVID-19 mask on his face. In addition to that I heard on the news that one bus driver in this city where I live got beaten almost to death in front of all the passengers on his bus at the tiime.

[@br1an_b]

1:47 “Adaptions”? I just looked it up and apparently it is indeed an alternate word for “adaptations.” I have not heard that used before! 😅

[@buzzsaw161]

My workplace was worse than anything anyone here could possibly imagine. Left PTSD scars. But, I must move on to survive

[@jessw314]

It was so therapeutic for me to watch this video.

[@Fedor-lq4vz]

Loss of confidence, trust of one’s own sanity and judgment, trust in co-workers and trust in management are just some of the things that result in a toxic and unprofessional workplace. If it wasn’t for the support of family and loved ones, my faith, counselling, I wouldn’t be here. Don’t let your job determine your sense of worth. Realize that you need to grieve, rest, and slowly heal. God bless.

[@clairewilliams9416]

This suddenly makes my life make more sense. My first 3 jobs were toxic including being bullied in 1 and set up for theft in another, the first is too complicated to discuss. I’m on my second non toxic job now in my 40’s and I still feel stressed and on edge all day everyday so I’ve no energy after work to do anything. I constantly feel that I’m not good enough and any moment my boss will discover I’ve no clue what I’m doing even though she’s made it clear that if she wasn’t happy with my performance she would let me know.

[@truecolor357]

Finally, some content on such an important topic. Love your channel ❤️

[@cridenh2owo257]

this came out just in time. i just finally got a great low stress office job but it's hard to shake off my old coping machanisms

[@mdesnica]

TOtally understandable. The best one can do is to have a stoic perspective on things: That job was there to strentghen you and measure how you coped. Post traumatic Growth, more than stress.

[@Starreelynn]

The is the best video I’ve seen explaining how I’ve felt about my work. Thanks for creating this.

[@MrDukeus]

I finally got out of my toxic job. 5 years I stayed because I thought it would get better, but to your point you really do believe the next job could be worse and perhaps pass it over because you're apprehensive. Thank goodness I had the confidence to move forward and now in a position that is the opposite of toxic. Yes, you guessed it non-toxic. :)

[@mariez8489]

Although it wasn't a workplace, this video resonates with me so much looking back on nursing school. I was such a shell of my former self after experiencing a toxic boss in the form of a clinical instructor. I barely made it through. It has been 2 years since (thankfully graduated🎉) and I'm now just starting to feel like I am getting back to feeling myself again. Thank you for putting this experience into words that I couldn't at the time ❤

[@squidward66]

soldier up, it's tough out there. I enjoyed this video and it was helpful, but do not, ever, trust anyone at work.

[@MathAdam]

This lady is describing the last several months before my (early) retirement.

[@peterdidow3228]

This is me. Since 2012. MF'ers blacklisted me in not just that industry as well! I have not been the same and it ruined my life. Still dont know what to do.

[@babblesp1367]

I just had a death in the family. My boss is really questioning me about it, even though I’ve never taken bereavement since I’ve been there. The policy says I’m allowed up to 3 days for this person. However, this boss is questioning me in ways that shouldn’t be questioned.

[@misspat7555]

I had anxiety attacks just driving past my toxic workplace for over 3 years after getting fired from there the second time. Now, management has changed and I’m back. Because my daughter is now receiving day care there, as my son was before, and that works better if I also work there. It’s still awful, but now I know it’s not a career. I also am not having anymore kids! 😤

[@lalida6432]

I used to have dreams of my old jobs months after I had quit. It was exhausing.

[@Astral_Dusk]

Takes some time to let it go - it's literally mental trauma in many and perhaps most cases. Modern society seems to underestimate trauma in my opinion, the ancient ones were well aware, ritualistically healing traumas as a way of life. There are certainly opportunities for us to accept that traumas are part of life and that we can heal them in many healthier ways - maybe clinical psychedelics too in extreme cases. 😎

[@angeliclioness8132]

Thank you so much for this perspective

[@PeeGeeThirteen]

The aftermath of the toxicity of my former employer affected my confidence and trust issues 5 years into my current employer. It all nearly subsided

[@notthesame89]

A toxic supervisor cost me my health and career. Not only was I diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder but I have been suffering from all the symptoms mentioned in the video. I lost trust in everyone around me including my own family😢 Definitely can’t trust anyone anywhere I work.

[@madz2013]

I've been in my new amazing and supportive job for 7 months and still cannot shake the traumatizing experience of my last job. It got so bad my hair fell out, and I experienced my first dissociative episode. I genuinely think it gave me some ptsd

[@mzwhiplash]

I worked a dehumanizing job for 5 years that broke my body amd burned me out. Started getting harassed for being LGBT and quit. Had a couple other toxic experiences after that and now its 2 years later and i get so much workplace anxiety that I haven't been able to hold anything down for more than a couple weeks.

[@b.lloydreese2030]

Every job ive had as an adult, for the most part, was toxic. My last job i was there 6 years and i keep having dreams im at work and getting yelled at by my boss

[@roser2058]

Does this guidebook tackle toxicity that comes from clients/customers? Many of us who have client facing positions have scars from the humiliation and bullying that we had to swallow. It made me lose faith in humanity for years.

[@evitamaria285]

I hate to paint this with a broad brush but where are the non-toxic work environments?? I left one nightmare to find myself in nearly the same situation. I’m conscious of my behavior and avoid those survival reactions and instincts but some of us (minorities in particular) face this time and time again. I think we need to fully remove our talents from these vampiric corporations that foster these environments that just drain everyone’s life force!

[@999timepass]

Exactly. I had 4 toxic employers in a span of 6 years that destroyed me completely.

[@IshtarNike]

They do exist. But sadly they are definitely in the minority.

[@fennyellis3366]

Become your own boss!!

[@evitamaria285]

@@999timepass very relatable! I’m sorry you’re going through that. I know the immense suffering you must be dealing with and the subsequent fall out from it. Especially on in your physical body. I hope you find peace and healing soon ♥️!

[@evitamaria285]

@@fennyellis3366 I’m not sure everyone is built for that. I’m not even able to pursue that route fully because my nervous system is completely obliterated after over 20 years of prolonged corporate trauma. It’s so easy to just dish out meaningless advice without fully understanding someone’s circumstances ain’t it?

[@ccalexander1924]

Working In healthcare is the worse. I’m currently a travel tech so I take contracts for 3 months and if I hate it I don’t extend. Most of the time I don’t extend. The assigment I am on now is horrid. The supervisor is a micro manager. He comes to the department every single day to gives you reminders. The reminders are things I know bc I been a tech for 15 years. But he walks over and says things like “ don’t forget to plug the machine in before you leave , don’t forget to take out all of the dirty linen every night , don’t forget to lock the cabinets when you leave. When I told him I know ! I have been a tech for 15 years. I know ! He says “ oh this is just a friendly reminder. No. It’s not. It’s him just making sure he throws his authority around to make it seem like he is a very good boss when he is extremely annoying. Then one day he says “ oh I need you to do your Istat test. I said I did … 3 weeks ago. Then I have a co worker who is a tattle tale. She literally runs to the office to tattle on things like you left a light on at night , you left one pillowcase in the dirty linen bag ( bc it must be 100 percent empty when she walks in in the morning “ she has gotten a few people written up over the dumbest things . I have 8 weeks left at this miserable contract . The hospital is in Columbus Ohio. I did another contract in Columbus and it was just as bad. I don’t plan on ever ever working , driving , visiting or anything in Columbus. I hate this entire dump of a city

[@francesbernard2445]

I agree. To be honest I am afraid to go back to work in health care given the fact that my youngest daughter ended up with a concussion because the patient whom she had just been reasigned to with Dementia took an instant dislike to her. While she was still trying to recover from a roll over car accident too. In additioin to that one of my professors last year admitted to me that she hurt her back so bad while working in health care now she has to be a part time teacher at a nursing school instead.

[@CassieMakesArt]

I’ve been in therapy after leaving a toxic job almost 3 years ago…I LOVE the term PTJS. My therapist said I absolutely have workplace trauma. I can’t even drive by the place without having an anxiety attack.

[@JenniferBrick]

I'm so happy you're working with a therapist to process this. Trauma is trauma no matter where it occurs.

[@rturney6376]

I find all workplaces are dis functional to some level.

[@sheek_side]

I am feeling this definitely. 😢

[@SarahD-s4y]

Yup terrified the next place will be like my last three.

[@yurianx]

I had a big luck when it comes to my "ex" work. The boss was extremely controlling and manipulating and his behavior had an impact on the whole team equally. But that didn't split the group, in fact it tighten our relations. Even tho part of the team managed to find themselves in new workplaces, we are still supporting those, who cannot make the immediate decision to leave the toxic workplace. It's definitely easier to overcome the situation, when you have on your back someone, who understands you completely

[@jimg2850]

Having being laid off from a toxic environment and finding a practically dream job I am wary that things might change and a new manager might infect my new work place. So far I am just happy and almost grateful to have been laid off.

[@njay4361]

You nailed it!!! This was spot on!

[@Lynxdoc]

I’ve had nightmares 5 years after leaving a toxic job with a gaslighting boss. During the time I was there I would wake up with such severe stress I would wake up with cold sweats and gripping my pillow so hard my hands would be numb.

[@npkrn6764]

This happens in university/college also. In one way, its even worse because often, you're stuck. If you simply quit, it will often cost more time and money than switching jobs. I was part of a grad program at a major U.S. university and without writing a paper here to give details, it ended up costing me $10k in having to drop classes after the withdrawal date. It was a nightmare during, and after losing so much time and trust in people 😢 It's been 2 years and I'm terrified to go elsewhere to finish my degree - especially considering this current culture of many universities.

[@sifelaver]

you are hitting the nail on the head all around

[@annabaum7977]

I worked at a toxic work environment... it was my first job after college... it took me 2 years to even apply for another job, as I was so scared.

[@politreg4356]

On my the latest job. Despite the fact that I was married, wore huge marriage ring band, was 9 months pregnant with my daughter. My boss, Despite that he also was married, wanted to SA me. Fortunately, it didn't happen. I didn't report him because I was afraid for my pregnancy and also I didn't have any proofs and I wanted to never deal with it more. Now, when I am even thinking about coming back to work as an employee, right away in that moment, I feel panic attacks and whole my heart I don't want work. I am thinking about opening my own business instead of working, but I am afraid to risk that. Just because of one creepy man, I feel mentally broken to continue working as an employee

[@KevinBetts-ud2lq]

After working for over 40 years it's not the job it's the managers

[@nowherenothere]

How do I find a healthy, well adjusted company? They are all great in the interview, a nightmare as soon as you start.

[@lauraschouweiler-sy1os]

You are so right!

[@Iquey]

What if every job is a toxic job? It's a quest to find the least toxic one and not totally lose your soul.