The Best One-Liners From Every Stand-Up Show | Volume 1 | Jimmy Carr

What's your favourite Jimmy Carr one-liner? Let us know down below! 👇 - Welcome to Jimmy Carr's official KZbin channel, where you can find all the best bits from his stand-up comedy shows, TV appearances, podcasts, and more!
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[@bobthenob9017]

"Looks like the type of girl that can make a great breakfast.... but wouldnt share it with you" 😂😂😂😂😂😅😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@strayxxiii7601]

3:35 stop eating fucking cameras had me in tears 😂😂😂

[@lexxwhite747]

You are in fact still hilarious. Finally got to see you live in Ottawa this year, and apart from the venue basically providing fucking camping chairs for the front row, the show was spectacular!

[@heisenstein6392]

Hells yeah! Poor kid got picked on way too much by Jimmy during the whole show tho, Ryan I think he was called? 😂

[@khush1894]

when is he coming to ontario next? any idea?

[@rawx485]

Finally going to see him live in a few months.

[@dmitriydanylyuk9525]

Been waiting for a new Video for all day long ❤️

[@barbaraisabella]

I love Jimmy Carr, silliness, it's funny to see how long it takes some folks to understand his jokes, teehee... if you like this you will love Tim Minchin & Bo Burnam, & Ricky Gervais...love love love

[@barbaraisabella]

I love the way he tries to shock his audience, he will keep trying...teeheehee💞💕

[@kuukeli]

thank you for the video

[@jimbrown5552]

Thanks again for sharing

[@muppetmike69]

Seen you live your just amazing 😂😂😂😂😂

[@rb8058]

That Alan Carr joke is brutal

[@Descan26]

7:16😂

[@mr.rainbowlovescoffee]

Play Jimmy Carr you said "that was an old clip of me". how can that be when you were much younger back then? 😂😂

[@asholegoogle985]

Gold as always!

[@momstopflashing]

fantastic, but yes, i want your "come back"

[@carlisroy6666]

Ew!

[@brandondaley2254]

You’ll have to scrape it of his teeth

[@musicloverme3993]

@@brandondaley2254 * your mum's * teeth.

[@momstopflashing]

@@brandondaley2254 nice twist 😂

[@Scottish_Trucker]

🤣🤣🤣🤣 👏🏻👏🏻

[@7anner780]

I just asked Siri to convert 34 stone and she gave it to me in short tons in case you’re wondering

[@jerryjungle5717]

Did you change your name from Wayne to Jimmy ?

[@robchissy]

thats not how sunderland people talk, we'd say "am nee geordie"

[@JeremyF-fp3ip]

You're totally right, after go’ogling around I didn't realize that Simmy Krotiel's Bigger Blueprint was updated and you can make it bigger even faster, yep, what Simmy suggested before was pretty good, but now it can grow up to 4 ins, I managed 3 ins myself and I feel like a monster lol

[@tonib9261]

Something for everyone to find offensive. Never change.

[@user-hp2yj9sp8m]

Pmsl

[@terrydavidson5052]

Is this supposed to be funny Funnier guys at work

[@Heygoodlooking-lk9kg]

Do people pay to come see them being funny?

[@daveevans1236]

Listent to your first so call joke regarding high school killings, so wrong, shameful!

[@stevenlarratt3638]

Listened to? Maybe you should go back to school to learn to spell? Sorry, too soon?

[@LHyoutube]

Maybe get a sense of humour?

[@petersmitgary]

Jimmy Carr was funny, from naughties to especially until the very first Netflix special around 2016, but after coalescing with the pharmaceutical industry and vociferous pontification of trust the science platitude, the grandiose façade under the glossy veneer of irreverent comedian had unpleasantly repudiated own identity and integrity. That adverse reactions and deleterious effects of his pernicious vaccination and unconscionable boosters on his look at the end lament the quintessence of perennial diminution in comedy.

[@woopimagpie]

Somebody got a dictionary for their birthday. Pity you didn't use it to write something that actually makes sense.

[@johnb8336]

Yes

[@petersmitgary]

@@woopimagpie Your insoluble inferiority complex and inability to inhibit previous thoughts will not be assuaged through in the state of intransigence.

[@woopimagpie]

@@petersmitgary Feel free to refer to my original comment. It still applies.

[@petersmitgary]

@@woopimagpie When you are inherently inexorable and impervious to developing the capability of examining cognition, which might have contributed to your emotional dysregulation.

[@earlrussell1026]

You must love Jehovah your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. You must love your neighbor as yourself. Jesus the Anointed is Lord! Repent and be baptized and believe the Evangelism.

[@Heygoodlooking-lk9kg]

There are no gods, no e, grow up

[@mrEtanMW]

I used to have an imaginary friend once, but I grew up and stopped going to church

[@jcbanbury]

GROW UP.

[@darrenthomson1930]

Jimmy Carr eh mmm ain't he that bloke who was pimping the covid jab... Not funny at all

[@Heygoodlooking-lk9kg]

That's why the audience laughs so and why he's so popular, because he's not funny