John Cooper Clarke - Hairdresser Joke

[@lindsayrogers6690]

I’m reading “I Wanna be Yours” his newly released autobiography. It’s absolutely brilliant! I like to think that I can string a sentence together but I am humbled by how articulate this fella is, his vocabulary is awesome. Just treat yerself and buy it!!!

[@aidenwrenn5342]

It’s a wonderful book and a laugh a minute. Best tenner I ever spent. There’s lots that could be not exactly true but wtf.

[@ex-scientia4234]

I’ve almost finished listening to the audiobook which he narrates himself. It’s great.

[@MrJeremySF]

thanks for the heads up

[@vamboroolz1612]

Off to buy it now😁

[@terrypussypower]

@@ex-scientia4234 Where's the audio book that he narrates?

[@heh1914]

this video is such a vibe with temptation playing, it's like sitting in the pub listening to a mate's story

[@shuax]

haha spot on

[@ThomasRobbins1988]

This!

[@jeffsmith50001]

A proper Pub with no kids or Women. 3 pork pies under glass on the bar. Im in the Tap Room having 4 fags and 5 pints of Mild.

[@rjy8960]

I've met him a few times and he is without doubt one of the nicest, most gentle and articulate human beings you could ever hope to spend time with. He is one of my (probably the biggest) heroes.

[@minimoog4236]

JCC's genius haiku: To convey one’s mood In seventeen syllables Is very diffic Thanks Johnny.

[@Cavitation68]

‘To freeze the moment in seventeen syllables is very diffic’… Sorry for being pedantic about it is the actual quote 😉

[@nigelhunter4230]

When I was doing my apprenticeship as a joiner at Salford Tech, John was the storesman who gave you the tools and stuff you needed. He was very funny. I think he used to tell poems over at the Woolpack pub. Listen to his poem on the Telly Tubbies.

[@lindsayrogers6690]

Went to see the guy a few weeks ago. Absolutely superb!! Right up to date humour, blisteringly funny observations. “ I’m recently divorced.” We shared the family home - - - I got the outside.” 😂😂😂

[@ThefightingCelt]

American comedians were using that joke in the 1950s . Even so , John Cooper Clarke is a legend and he tells a good joke well , even though most of them are ancient , though still funny .

[@edglue6138]

@@ThefightingCelt American comedians?

[@highdownmartin]

Thing I like about a reported JCC joke is “ yair kennearim saaaayin it” Great

[@zabaleta66]

@@ThefightingCelt Sam Kinison died years ago......

[@GG-ml3vr]

@@ThefightingCelt No such thing as a new joke ,just depends who can remember the most😀

[@christianjackson1807]

Love John, Love New Order

[@svenlittlecross]

genuine git love him

[@anthonylees9029]

Really funny ! Never disappointed by JCC . Absolute legend . Tells a great story and his poetry is the business ! Rock on !

[@paulguy5368]

Great clip! JCC is brilliant. First heard him back in 1977 on the "Streets" compilation album (I still have it). Also nice to see Donnie Sutherland (the host) again. I used to watch his shows religiously.

[@GG-ml3vr]

Seen his show two years ago in Dundee,during one of his wonderful rants somebody in the audience did that single clap thing in the wrong place and without skipping a beat he said,save it till the end give me it in a lump sum.True legend

[@bonkeydollocks1879]

Slow clap as in a protest type thing

[@larrymclarnon-pd8xf]

I love John, I had the supreme joy of seeing him recently in bellaghy in the occupied 6.

[@wcjohnny1]

The epitome of the British joke . Took a long time to get there and wasn't really that funny . ( which actually makes it funnier ) .

[@haroldofcardboard]

i thought it was hillarious. i wet myself. there again, i am a brit.

[@Hellwyck]

Awww John, did a British joke not want to fuck you or is your sense of humour a bit lacking in general?

[@Pholcusphalangioides8]

Not really, norm Macdonald has a load of jokes in this style

[@guins99]

American here, I loved it. Love the Brit’s.

[@geddunn]

It’s quality. All in the delivery of a truly corny joke. Brilliant. He’s great these days on 8 out of 10 cats countdown. And yeah his biography is a great read.

[@haroldofcardboard]

OMG i laughed sooo hard. and how took a drag and rocked his head after. icing on the cake. and omg he told it so well. thats talent! thanks for upload!!

[@EasyTiger.01343]

Fascinating.

[@styxcreek]

A young Michael Hutchence to his left. I saw JCC and New Order on this tour of Oz. JCC was unforgettable.

[@richardfinlayson1524]

yeah me too, palais st kilda

[@euanelliott3613]

John reminds me very much of the late Gary Holton who played Wayne in Auf Weidersehen Pet.

[@dreamliving3858]

I thought the exact same! 👍

[@petems3283]

@@dreamliving3858 yes

[@JoeLondon-te3hf]

Ditto!

[@MrEss-ld3sw]

Johnny Cooper Clarke in my recommendations. Nice surprise

[@DrRinse]

When I lived in Nottingham, my flatmate worked as a promoter for a local comedy club. He offered me a free ticket to see a "John Cooper Clarke". I didn't know who he was and when my flatmate described him as a "punk poet", I rolled my eyes. I went anyway and I don't think I've ever laughed that hard at a live comedy gig in my life. He tore the roof off the place and and I became an instant fan.

[@khrystree9233]

Absolutely outstanding 😁

[@JonnyCooper]

That is a great gag. One of the classics

[@MUFFINHEAD1985]

Jesus this is good, Norm and him are cut from the same cloth.

[@surfsupcharlie]

classic JCC. intellect + humour = Genius

[@benscottbongiben]

Sat beside him in bungies once. Quiet guy. Best poet ever! Stuck in chicken town, prophetic for today

[@davidripley2916]

. . . Evidently!🐓🐔

[@ppmppm7010]

I know this is a bit late but I can't believe bungies is still going I went there in the early seventies

[@tooyoungtobeold8756]

I sat next to Frank Zappa in a London club once in the 70s - and that's my claim to fame.

[@bobikdylan]

Woolwich Polytechnic (now part of the University of Greenwich) used to have a bar in the cellar. One night I was there to see a band (maybe local boys Squeeze). In comes JCC, who was a suuport act. He was totally pissed and made an important announcement. " 'as anyone seen a blue marblette notebook?" Dunno if he found it but he went on and did his thing flawlessly. Must have been about 1980.

[@G58]

Superb telling

[@derin111]

Fucking priceless. John Cooper Clarke should have a Knighthood or a peerage by now.

[@bobikdylan]

They only go to TV personalities the queen likes. So Sir Tony Robinson gets one because she liked Time Team. What a joke. (Yeah, she's dead, but you know what I mean.)

[@HeronPoint2021]

@@bobikdylan never heard of this guy. did he ever leave the UK? the Commonwealth would like to know.

[@nicksmart5469]

From a misunderstanding seeing his name scrawled on the bog door at school (I thought it was the name of a fellow inmate) to ten years later my then boss lent me his “10 years in an open necked shirt” poetry collection John has had me pissing myself for 30 years! Here’s to 30 more !

[@Exisles]

He signed that book for me 'Elvisly Yours' at a gig in Newbury !

[@nicksmart5469]

@@Exisles the book my boss lent me was called “10 years in an open necked shirt” It’s rarer than rocking horse droppings apparently ! Apparently he doesn’t live round my manchester anymore! He’s in Essex now I’ve heard ! Are you from Newbury then ?

[@Exisles]

@@nicksmart5469 ​ @Nick Smart Hi there; That's the one I've got & it's an original paperback; I was a teenage werewolf who bought 'Disguise In Love' upon it's release. Learnt all the words.Though being from south of England couldn't do the Manc accent justice, when quoting the great bard ! He died on stage in Newbury 2000. Though I still got to buy him a pint & get the book monikered.

[@haroldofcardboard]

@@Exisles amazing story there. a treasure and a treasured memory. glad for you my freind and likewise to you @Nick Smart

[@nervesconcord]

I'll bet you smell like a retirement home.

[@aidenwrenn5342]

That was one of my Dad’s jokes. He lived in Salford for a while 👍🤣😎

[@mikejones-go8vz]

Love the way he says ‘Catholics’

[@ripme6616]

I thought he was going to say cunts🤣

[@edwgwilymedwgwilym2827]

You’re the man Clarke

[@mogwaifan7094]

My favourite quote from JCC. Home Honey I'm high.

[@neilwilson5785]

The Double Diamond flowed like sick, The Double Diamond flowed like sick Mother’s Pride, tortilla and chips Pneumatic drills when you try to kip …in Majorca

[@cyclesgoff9768]

We need more Jonny Clarke 😍

[@SA-ff9uc]

I want to hear him do the camel joke again. Can't find it anywhere.

[@greymouser8659]

Upstaged New Order on stage at the Capitol....then encored 'Sister Ray' with them. Great tour.

[@richardbrooks50]

I remember doing a piece in English back in the early 80s on his poem Majorkaa !

[@richardfinlayson1524]

ha , i saw new order and john cooper clarke at the Palais in Stkilda in about 82 or3, this must be from that tour, the Saints played too

[@stevetaylor5290]

richard finlayson I was there. Quite the lineup

[@silverbullet8338]

Lol this man is absolutely brilliant. 😂✌👀

[@Smoshy16]

The joke is mildly funny but it's the delivery that makes it golden!

[@Thoughtcat]

The setup is funnier than the punchline, but that’s no bad thing ❤️

[@anthonydavies8459]

Amazing Guy !!!

[@imixmuan9081]

INXS, John Cooper Clarke and New Order (who apparently he was touring with) all on the same show in 1982. This is a historical video.

[@jamielacourse7578]

Loved his act in "Urrrgh- a Music War."

[@KevTheImpaler]

It's all in the delivery.

[@CUSTARDMIKE]

Best joke I’ve ever heard

[@southendsites]

You can see the compere of Working Men's clubs experience coming to the fore in this clip as He tells a perfect joke.

[@jrvondoom]

this is fucking genius, only john or norm macdonald could pull this one off.

[@billmago7991]

I grew up watching Sounds Unlimited then just Sounds with Donny Southerland saturday mornings in the 70s

[@hiramhackenbacker9096]

Brilliant

[@thetruthk5138]

Remember JCC was the warm up act for Suzie and the Banshees late eighties I think a long long time ago

[@lovelight1]

Love ya John. xxx

[@markswishereatsstuff2500]

Always end a joke lighting a ciggie. That's the capper.

[@him050]

Such a blokey joke. I don’t think I’ve ever gone into work after a a haircut without all the usual “was he pissed or something?” “When you going backing?” “Did he charge you for that?!” 😂

[@ruiseartalcorn]

Awesome!!! ;)

[@bobfor4868]

Everybody else on that couch was fked! Gurning and zoning out...proper spangled! JCC had probably been up for 3 days already!

[@clarke7421]

temptation by new order

[@papersplease]

Ooh coot yeh fookin air?

[@alexjames1146]

Donnie Sutherland. The Legend.

[@versioncity1]

nice. good old JCC

[@christrudell7966]

That was worth the wait 😂

[@Quinnysings]

That's JCC Brilliance For You .... Top Man .... Quinny

[@Justaglorifiedcrew]

Class 😂

[@lordsod69]

That's Michael Hutchence and another member of INXS on the couch there no? The lady looks familiar also; maybe the lady from the Eurogliders?

[@mediastarguest]

Brilliant ! Some people just don't got a sense of humour.

[@EasyTiger.01343]

Ooof! Meet the flavoured yoghurt of social commentary. Watch out for this guy!

[@shuddupeyaface]

Haha!! Beautiful

[@68majortom]

The guy is hilarious loved it when he Supported #TheFall

[@0faewfewa]

Ellen DeGeneres look so young here

[@petemarr824]

Its not her.

[@jwx0078]

Pete Marr No shit pete

[@jasongoodner1518]

And thick...

[@leerobertson7226]

0faewfewa she does indeed

[@gwendolynemaeystadt7531]

@@petemarr824 there will always be someone who says 'it's not her''. can't you tell a joke when you hear one?

[@davidkeen6184]

He looks like the Late Great Gary Holton. Great joke as well 😂

[@EmmaRiddle543]

That’s what was thinking. 😅

Great to hear the really, really, really ancient hairdresser joke repeated.....for the god knows how many times......

[@josephinebennington7247]

What was that word they bleeped out?

[@ThatCoalSoul]

F**king.

[@davesfriendhal]

Just wait till he tells you about the ghost cookies...

[@wellesradio]

Why was this on television and not the radio?

[@philipdurling1964]

Hilarious!

[@drstevie]

Fkn brilliant !!!!

[@walrtbstudios5430]

Shaggy dog story indeed, from one of the UK’s greatest modern poets.

[@bonkeydollocks1879]

He told this same joke on countdown i think it was or maybe 8 out of 10 cats countdown, lasy year, 2022, got 40 years out of it

[@niguel4438]

Why the irritating background music?

[@rogerbarton497]

Brilliant shaggy dog story

[@MrPjalex]

Love JCC but cannot fuckin well hear it properly as the background music is so loud

[@hacksdp3]

Legend.

[@QIKUGAMES-QIKU]

Was he in a band once ? Only know from 8 out of 10 cats

[@opaljk4835]

Fuck that was a good punchline

[@blablableh724]

They listening to New Order ?

[@michaeldeutrom9987]

Anyone know the name of the new order song playing ?

[@daledillard3281]

Temptation

[@kipperrepublic3568]

Brilliant 😂

[@gwendolynemaeystadt7531]

noble price for telling jokes... it's jcc!

[@emdiar6588]

Nobel Prize. A noble price is something completely different.

[@jamielacourse7578]

This dude was great in Urrgh......

[@pmay222]

who is this bloke...... he pops up and i am clueless as to why he is known..?

[@tommymossop1695]

I echo the comment below......brilliant read!

[@stephenbrough8132]

Where's the version without the music and without the edited out swear word?

[@teterouge1472]

The bard

[@77Fortran]

Can someone explain the punchline to me?

[@skyemegakitty]

The barber was cutting his hair as they had this extremely long debate, and in doing so got distracted and messed up his hair. or alternatively, the barber is a negative killjoy who ruins everything, and the man getting his hair cut made a story to point out that its HE that makes Italy miserable.

[@77Fortran]

@@skyemegakitty Thanks very much Beryl I appreciate it. I'm going to have a think about both of the punchlines and which I like the most!

[@waynerussell6401]

A Shaggy Dog Story has no punchline. The journey is everything, the destination is always a disappointment. It mirrors the irony of life. (Ronnie Corbett, the man consumed by a chair, was a minor master)

[@77Fortran]

@@waynerussell6401 I like that he makes such a great effort to meet the pope and the pope ends up being just like his barber.

[@waynerussell6401]

@@77Fortran As a 'joke' form it is akin to poetry in being evocative rather than declarative. You are left with a variety of emotions, including impatience and then get only a flavour of irony at the end. The origin of 'spinning a yarn'.

[@MrMrh1958]

Classic!😎

[@knuthalvorsen1196]

John Cooper Clarke. What a joke.

[@anthonybennett6351]

He looks like Gary Holden.

[@sbsb7845]

Funny Enough Pope JP2 would do that . And he was running that place in that years

[@Wotsitorlabart]

I think JCC might actually mean 'Roman' architecture.

[@tonyrichardson1140]

That's funny.🙂👍

[@UK-Blue]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👍🐕

[@Min-xm8tp]

John Cooper Clarke Yorkshire Jokes Your Welcome!

[@iank2615]

He's from Lancashire?

[@sashamoody1708]

Ian K greater manchester if you want to be precise, even more precise higher broughton

[@mamoran]

@@sashamoody1708 if you want to be even more precise he's from Salford ;0)

[@sashamoody1708]

Michael Moran higher broughton is just a bit more precise than salford 😁

[@Bradders-gy1zp]

Wayne from aufwiedersehn pet looks like JCC here