Jones' Cheap Ass Prepaid Legal and Daycare Academy

[@ddniel]

a lawyer, a barbecue store owner, a daycare owner, good at massages. this man is literally the definition of succesful

[@josiahallen6123]

Don’t forget truck rental and storage

[@hankhohn5017]

@@josiahallen6123 and TV producer

[@m4b9]

and he worked in a jail

[@otoyassunflower2131]

And a meme

[@mexican.peso.]

*god

[@redwolfe7049]

I love how the judge's robe is just his suit jacket worn backwards.

[@IAmKillEveryone]

OBJECTION! That is strictly hearsay and conjecture. I move to have it struck from the record.

[@rs7792]

Kill Everyone a

[@ir10031981]

8 years, and I have never subscribed to his channel.

[@neglesaks]

Kill Everyone I move top strike you from the record!

[@baronbrambeus]

Red Wolfe don’t forget the paid testimonial is the daycare shirt just inside out

[@ezzlon3241]

Jones is not responsible for stolen or damaged children - Jones

[@TheeNucas]

Oh no I would not want my child coming home in 2456467576837567 pieces

[@NefariousNumbskull]

64 bit intiture limit i see

[@ThatNerdAlbert]

@@NefariousNumbskull lmao

[@riceyoshi]

Molester free

[@nrggvrn5576]

In other words, Jones is free to steal and damage

[@fjordpitsky4486]

Toby Jones walked so Saul Goodman could run

[@OldCouches]

This is a commercial that would play in a GTA game

[@grigoriyefimovichrasputin7897]

Exactly

[@Cera_01]

-totally not leaked GTA 6 footage or anything-

[@grigoriyefimovichrasputin7897]

@@Cera_01 yes totes

[@blackalgorithmist000]

Facts 💯

[@K2REALL]

Old Couches thts true

[@Thndrstrike]

"Jones is not responsible for stolen or damaged children."

[@tannerphillips4456]

Thndrstrike “this weeks activities” Wed: fill out w-2s Fri: big dog eat child

[@carterbowe9964]

Lol

[@68corvette08]

"Santa Claus ain't comin' to none o' y'all."

[@schwany6703]

You have amassed quite a few likes. Just sayin

[@coydog7902]

That corvette PFP though. I’ve seen a 69 stingray in white

[@Darca1n]

Hooray, double negatives means everyone's getting a visit from santa!

[@nakoamechi]

@@Darca1n It's called a Negative concord rule in Grammar where the double negative are seen as one negative and not counteracts with each other.

[@Darca1n]

@@nakoamechi Still looks clumsy as all hell.

[@aokami7096]

"My legal advice is don't have mo' children." -Toby Jones, best legal advisor.

[@therealjcon]

If only my siblings would take that advice 😅

[@fortunatebum]

Pretty much folks in their mid 30's now.

[@BrocksJellyFilledDoughnuts]

Aged pretty well imo

[@ethanoliver12]

I trust him, he said molester free

[@SGTGhost]

don't forget he also pedobear free

[@untrust2033]

1000th like kek

[@rainah5316]

says the person with a xxxtentacles pfp

[@MirzaAhmed89]

I think that means the molester is included, for free.

[@chrishansenlive2772]

Gay pfp

[@nathandrake3070]

“JONES GOT ME THAT BIGASS Check!” Lol only 50$

[@mbufton]

Nathan Drake -result atypical

[@terrorcarnte]

But its in this broke ass society

[@joachymschiltz5739]

But look at the size of the cardboard, though. That's what I call BIGASS!

[@dylanthebiguy]

*takes the check and runs*

[@spacez3814]

done lul nah it’s fiddy cent

[@epicgamermoment6315]

“Top notch molester free daycare.” -Toby Jones

[@Sumschmuck]

I mean it's molester free

[@chrisw6164]

Big selling-point, really

[@digital107-_-]

That's really all you can ask for in today's society

[@HowToChangeName]

If there's molester you can sue them with its legal dept

[@Dolphinsfan1920]

Edp445: damn it

[@Nn-3]

"I'm on call, 3 hours a day, 5 hours a week"

[@musicaldramaqueen]

I came to the comments for that

[@Daveeeeeeyhowyoudoing]

@@musicaldramaqueen why? You just watched the video. Why do you feel the need to look for a quote? 😂 Do you feel the need to feel "included" so badly that you NEED someone to think what you thought was funny💀 You scream "pick me" energy

[@Doll.xox111]

@@Daveeeeeeyhowyoudoing it's really not that serious lol

[@desmondcoppin591]

Jesus Christ dude. They came to the comments for it because they wanted to see other people laughing about it. Sharing in moments like that is what called a “normal human behavior.” Stop making yourself look like an idiot who enjoys putting other people down for literally no reason. Next time, before you reply, take a couple deep breaths or some goddamn medication, and think about what you sound like compared to the actual thing your replying to, and how others will view that.

[@RedRockin6]

@@Daveeeeeeyhowyoudoing who hurt you?

[@Freethought73]

"My legal advice to you is don't have NO MORE CHILDREN......"

[@gregdubya1993]

*cheeee-ren

[@marquis_ugly23]

That's a double negative

[@geobrah1284]

People have a lot of kids for the welfare here in america

[@MezzoForte4]

Very true.

[@Darca1n]

So his advice is to have more kids then?

[@danteasdale286]

The line that ALWAYS kills me is when he says “Jones got me this big ass check!” And it’s 50$… 50$ less than what he had to have paid for the service lmao

[@not_milk]

The check was big however. Just not the amount on it

[@tyzoid]

"Result Atypical"

[@anoon-]

OBJECTION! $49.99 less than what he had to have paid for the service!

[@edwardmarshall2035]

"You might need my legal services...... 'cause Imma sue you."

[@wikiwikiwee1]

Its not about the money, its about sending a message

[@m1lkym4c24]

“My legal advice to you is dont have no more children”

[@Dante_Sparda_DMC]

So keep having children?

[@teslagoth9401]

Good advice

[@officalyormumbiggae8486]

@Fmono • 39 years ago • edited *Doesn't

[@elgallileo7173]

9/11th Like

[@Dante_Sparda_DMC]

@Fmono • 39 years ago • edited lol I know I was just joking

[@ThatSpecificIndividual]

"Santa Claus ain't coming for none of y'all" is such a great line.

[@lettuce984]

Oh… that’s what he said… *that’s not what I heard..*

[@RisenFreedom]

"I'm on call..3 hours a day..5 hours a week." Lost it

[@FerrariTeddy]

I lost it there 😂😂😂😂

[@rizune]

"In today's broke ass society, things are hard." Well damn this is 9 years old and still applies to me

[@VelvetMagician]

I like the Nisekoi picture on your profile

[@cesarmadero05]

It still aplies in today's broke ass society.

[@anerexicsumo5512]

On god

[@NefariousNumbskull]

Not niseoki its king dedede

[@rizune]

@@NefariousNumbskull it was nisekoi back then

[@byakuya4332]

Jones' absurdist humor was way ahead of his time

[@MASTEROFEVIL]

100th like

[@mikek4610]

Bya Kuya no...we had this in the 70s....when it was ok....funny af though

This guy deserves a spot on Adult Swim. Sad that he went viral only a decade later.

[@mikek4610]

Libertate Veritas isnt adult swim still on?

[@jebbus8387]

@@mikek4610 yeah it is

[@brian5o]

“My legal advice is don’t have no more children.” Wiser words have never been spoken.

[@lachlankeddie7]

I swear to God 2009 was the year KZbin peaked in its general quality. So much genuine content, before the monetized, clickbaity types came about...

[@jaydubcee_]

Lachlan Keddie I’m sure there’s still creators who make quality stuff, but it’s buried under KZbin’s algorithms and people trying to make this into a career.

[@ratchetexperience8379]

Ain't this nothing but the fucking truth

[@Ciara_Foxx]

I make sketch comedy teaching people to do the wrong things, all while titled to trick normies. We out here making original content, promotion just hard af.

[@PhilShary]

@@Ciara_Foxx Overall, normies ruin any type of community.

[@givecamichips]

2009 KZbin "quality" "before clickbait" Ok.

[@ACoustaDC]

His legal services are top-notch.. I was sentenced to twenty years, and he got me life!!! Free room and board for life!! I can't believe the money I'm gonna be saving on rent!!

[@sabrinatscha2554]

Best comment

[@seniorchonkza997]

Don't forget the Best part - free prostate massages

[@ACoustaDC]

@@seniorchonkza997 bonus!

[@rondohunter8966]

After I paid and he read over my papers, he gave me the address of his cousin in the Ivory Coast and said just go. Now, hurry.

[@olympia5758]

@@seniorchonkza997 Lmao!

[@kos2919]

I love his "Latin" motto: Billem Suem Payme. The whole video is one well written comedy

[@ewill312]

I didnt even notice, that is amazing 😂

[@i-never-look-at-replies-lol]

That one took me a second to get because I actually took Latin and was trying to comb through the memory banks to translate lol

[@arob79]

Reminds me of the motto for the law firm of Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe!

[@trailersandteasers3421]

@@arob79 lmao i was just about to say that from the 3 stooges

[@Ian_MacGregor]

I watched the whole video again just to find that one thing 😂😂😂

[@share_accidental]

i love how youtube decided to recommend this gem to me 14 years later

[@sonofastudstudios4552]

Same lmao 😂

[@Bumpy10Knuckles]

EXACTLY !!!!!×

[@caleroby9483]

YES!!! 😂😅

[@kaimcdragonfist4803]

“I’m on call! 3 hours a day, 5 hours a week.” Dang, he’s pulling overtime knowing he has several other businesses to run

[@stophatingeachother9762]

We're lucky he can even spare 15 hours on this.

[@tomparis37]

No those are actual attorney hours. Source: work in a law office.

[@alexiosandrianos8439]

@@stophatingeachother9762 15 hours? Don't you mean 5 hours?

[@AidanJ___]

My whole day revolves around Jones. I drop off my kid at Jone’s Child Care in the morning, get a foot massage after, eat lunch at his BBQ, then I get legal advice for my divorce and I top the day eating again at Jones BBQ.

[@votpavel]

also parking truck you rent at johnes big ass truck rental and storage

[@Selvokaz]

but you didn't pick the kids back up.

[@futureadonis4243]

And then dropping off stuff at his storage facility THEN going back to Jones BBQ for the 3rd time

[@tyvan5696]

Don’t forget about the storage units

[@Western-Inferno]

Nice

[@THESNEAKERADDICT]

This guy should be on SNL

[@twinkletoesmcfuckass8687]

He's too good for them.

[@Barrobroadcastmaster]

This guy is leagues ahead of SNL without the political agenda.

[@mage4516]

Barro the Broadcaster yes thank you snl just jokes about trump 24-7.

[@Barrobroadcastmaster]

EM To be fair, SNL hasn't been funny this decade.

[@mage4516]

Barro the Broadcaster yeah thats my point.

[@squatchjosh1131]

Lol love the Latin on the badge of law. "Billem Suem Payme"

[@jesuschrist9513]

"Top-notch molester-free daycare center" Seems legit

[@shrekonion8307]

Jesus christ jesus christ you need jesus christ

[@joshuadoobie7984]

That had me rolling around lmaoooo

[@benizok3621]

Hey if jesus says it’s real, I guess it’s real

[@Ahaaka1]

jones is the real jesus

[@fisherchumley573]

its 100 dollars to get his services but yet he only won a check worth 50 dollars in his court case

[@Notkalas]

"Results atypical"

[@underworld323]

And he keeps 15%

[@filipelimartins]

But it's a big ass check

[@KevinP32270]

That took me out lolololol

[@FerrariTeddy]

Just like real court cases

[@nickschwarzmann]

"You are not the president. You don't need to make that type of money. You just raising one kid!"

[@Korgeh]

“You Might Need My Legal Services, Because Ima Sue You”

[@fbi5150]

I almost died when it said we are not responsible for stolen or damage children.

[@domantas8185]

When the joke is so good it can almost kill a whole agency.

[@A_Prius]

Lol same

[@CalebMcFadden]

Hello brother

[@ethanbakerthealienking]

Almost? Why almost?

[@zilch-x1054]

Is this an okay environment for the children, FBI? Like has his business got your acknowledgement!?! I mean usually you would do the whole: "FBI! Open up!" I'm guessing Jone's got some power. Oh no, I've said too much. Please don't silence me!

[@karencruz8680]

That "Owe me money" file looks kind of thin, that's a sign of a good business man.

[@bacoloidlizar7417]

the fact that he has a baseball bat in his hands along with the file makes it even better

[@The_Neon_Nubian111]

" in today's broke ass society" and "grand baby", took me out!!!!! LMAOOO

[@jose2226]

By the way you have over 800 likes on this comment.

[@helllpppp684]

Misfortune Follows, r/whooosh

[@jose2226]

@@helllpppp684 you have to have a reason to wooosh someone ya know.

[@helllpppp684]

Misfortune Follows, Did U Get The Joke? Or Did It Go Over Your Head?

[@elmothewise3915]

@@jose2226 look at his name fuckhead

[@MrXlee1967]

The number still works, and he hasn't raised his prices! Call now. I'm so happy he's still in business.

[@Westonplayspc]

Nope it's now a Google voice number

[@tripodsforme1868]

0:36 Jones: “I’ll invest wisely” Kids : *Shakes* *head*

[@cadinlimon2894]

I got to see him do stand-up in Chicago on a random evening. Made my night

[@1Plebeian]

Damn, some people have all the luck.

[@jcmick8430]

That would be a specific evening you're referring to

[@NunyaBizznaz]

@@jcmick8430 🤡🤡

[@judassb9190]

The black Saul Goodman

[@dreamypunx]

YES! JUST YES!!

[@badhorse1640]

Better call saul

[@maxhuber1129]

@@badhorse1640 better call joe

[@michaelschafer9331]

Right on

[@pastoryoda2789]

Green Bean lmao

[@bunnerkins]

This video was made in 2009 and it still feels like it could have been made yesterday.

[@felonkeller_ss]

Monday - Water Day!! Tuesday- Dinosaurs Wednesday- Fill out W-2's Thursday - Sand day Friday - Big dog eat child *sounds good to me*

[@KevinP32270]

Lolololol I can't breathe lolololol

[@starlafetcho4433]

The hero i needed thank you

[@blokvader8283]

*THIS IS A DINOSAUR*

[@claus4670]

The ultimate countdown.

[@i-never-look-at-replies-lol]

Sounds like I'm only dropping my children off there on Fridays then

[@GIANTENEMYB1RD]

On the whiteboard at the daycare it says "Fill out W-2's" haha

[@Aj-gd4sg]

Wait what?

[@MrWegosolo]

I caught that! The guy is Comedic Genius!!

[@amspook]

@Autism Lord It's a tax form

[@kingbradley6000]

teaching something actually useful in life

[@datemasamune2106]

@@herooftoast6506 People who have a job but don't live in the US fucking A couldn't know what it is.

[@keatontodd9721]

This man is the definition of a “hard working American”

[@oregondude9411]

*African*-American... /s

[@retracted3383]

@@oregondude9411 American

[@Ilazie]

@@oregondude9411 were all Americans shut

[@rahsaanthomas7030]

@@oregondude9411 American. Period.

[@AnthonyBlamthony]

@@oregondude9411 I hate being called African American, I don’t know Africa or even how much countries are in it, but I damn sure know the states. It’s just “American”.

[@Duk3Silv3r]

Nice to see a lawyer who keeps his "owe me money" records close by. True professional right there, this guy.

[@JacobEifert]

"Jones' got me this big ass check" *only 50 dollars

[@giftedflow5818]

Well I mean I was a BIG ASS check.

[@kostiantyntrenert2042]

IT WAS WHITE CORRUGATED ROOFING XD

[@SergioGMika]

Shush.. its was a big ass check!

[@heheheiamasupahflyingace3921]

What makes it even worse is that it costs $99.99 so they just lost $49.99.

[@DarthTurducken]

Wouldn't fit in the ATM though

[@armageddon1981]

I noticed when he played the judge, he took his suit jacket and turned it around😁😁😁😁😁💀💀💀💀💀

[@Voodoo66Chile]

Lmao I did not notice that, thank you! Hahahahaha

[@properlike11]

😂😂😂

[@innertubez]

YES HAHAHA

[@tafarikhalil7249]

😂😂😂 I’m screaming

[@Lazaven]

I came here specifically for this comment 😂😆🤣

[@masterslicendice3423]

"my legal advice to you is don't have no more children"

[@skeetercreek6455]

I love that his service cost 99.99, and the clients big ass check was 50.00 😂

[@SuperHamsterhuey]

1:01 "Jones got me this big ass check" That was signed 6 years ago. For $50...

[@SteffenYoshiki]

but its a big ass check

[@carljohnson5781]

You mean 12 yrs ago

[@SuperHamsterhuey]

Sydney Brooks The check read from 2003, the video was made in 2009

[@carljohnson5781]

SuperHamsterhuey but why would he use the old check from 2003 in a 2009 video

[@SuperHamsterhuey]

Sydney Brooks Do I look like a wizard? The answer is yes, but I still don't know

[@anamazingfantasy1999]

Why am I just discovering this? I’ve never laughed so hard!

[@KevinP32270]

Exactly lolol

[@jeanniemaycrawford4466]

This man is so talented, he's a lawyer, a Masseuse and a barbeque expert. Truly an overachiever

[@michaelh1603]

He also owns a storage company.

[@StriderStryker]

I almost broke down in tears of laughter when he pulled out a baseball bat from his desk.

[@dogwithplasticwheels5476]

You know he'll get you hooked when he says, "Now, friends..."

[@KevinP32270]

Gets me everytime lolololol

[@indahf.freztiyana824]

_"Billem Suem Payme"_ The best lawyer slogan I've ever seen...

[@whiteythaboss407]

DEWEY CHEATEM AND HOWL

[@darthinvaderzimm]

0:45 "Jones is not responsible for stolen or damaged children."

[@dreamshooter90]

Commie. *Glares*

[@nbaoldgirl]

0:41 you can’t get that nowadays! This man is a genius 😂

[@bigt1877]

“Jones got me this big ass check” has me In Tears 😭😂😂😂

[@IamGenoBlack]

Results atypical

[@WJames-nq2df]

"You might need my legal services... cuz I'm gonna sue you." Well it is an untapped market...

[@broadwaymelody33]

“Santa Claus ain’t comin’ to none a y’all” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@avantesmith6442]

“In today’s broke ass society….” Almost took me out before I could get started 😂😂😂😂

[@ForbiddenFate]

"You may need my legal services Cuz ima sue you"

[@T1Oracle]

I sure hope this guy is getting paid. 11 years and this stuff is still gold. I hope he's healthy and rich.

[@LiAR17ps3]

"Im on call three hours a day, five hours a week" LMFAOO

[@teeblurr2413]

Jesus how is this guy not more famous? Cried laughing!

[@loganchild1682]

“3 hours a day, 5 hours a week” 😂😂😂

[@kelp1233]

LOL THE MEXICAN JONES MUSTACHE

[@tlazo3627]

1:00

[@flufflederpiflurry4739]

Im from Mexico and this is funny (If my English is not that good im sorry)

[@unalguien1347]

Of what are you talking about? That isnt Jones, he is a mexican man helped by Jones you dont see?

[@grigoriyefimovichrasputin7897]

Yes you are using proper english 👌😊👍

[@NOABXD]

@@grigoriyefimovichrasputin7897 Shut the fuck up

[@SmellsLikeNothing]

That "fighting for you" was as genuine as actual lawyer commercials which says a lot about our society

[@lessermook7608]

it's the cuts, his voice, the delivery, "molester free", everything.

[@Wubbazt]

the fact that there were actually parents who were fine with their children being in this commercial--

[@urinetrouble0543]

Who said their parents were fine with it

[@kutter_ttl6786]

How many day cares do you know guarantee that they're molester free? Dudes legit bro.

[@nevaeh8953]

Wubbazt i can’t tell if you’re joking or not... but either way they are all family members of the youtube channel that posted this

[@votpavel]

its an operating daycare,they just filmed the day they were open,and kids are always there

[@pico4996]

RE-L Mayer no, they were at a friends house.

[@adrih8694]

"We'll provide you with our top-notch molester-free daycare services." had me screeching!

[@bobbydodge5091]

1:34 that is really good ass advice.

[@damiencrossley7497]

14 YEARS AND STILL GOLD!

[@omarmorales2081]

despite being hilarious this video does teach a real valuable lesson

[@casuallectures2655]

"Fuck that" best and only lesson u need

[@lilliangriffin9013]

Yeah, DON"T have kids!

[@fredricknoe3114]

Omar Morales yeah we need to seize the means of BBQ and foot massage from the Bourgeoisie

[@cipherthedemonlord8057]

Yeah don't have kids.

[@johnjohnson7888]

No kids no grown ups and no grown ups no new humans no humanity means no more problems!

[@vertex1933]

M O L E S T E R F R E E D A Y C A R E S E R V I C E S

[@ethanc3956]

Wife: honey have any ideas for where to send Isabelle? Me: 😏

[@Ishan-f7w]

I love the voicemail message you get when you try to call the number listed in the video. It's great. The guy sound totally done with the calls.

[@unnamed715]

Better call Saul? Better phone Jones!

[@terraincognita9614]

"My advice to you is don't have no more children" *best advice ever all jokes aside*

[@richerlennon9429]

Give this guy his own Netflix sketch comedy show. These commercials are genuinely hilarious

[@NFITC1]

Why, KZbin? Why would you just NOW recommend this service to me?! WHERE WERE YOU 14 YEARS AGO?!!?!

[@amir78989]

saul goodman: Finally! A Worthy Opponent! Our Battle Will Be Legendary!"

[@marcuslewis2760]

Anyone catch on to this dude said lmao "I'm on the phone 3 hours a day 5 hours a week"

[@electronbeing5473]

Yeah no one else heard that just you dude

[@minitaetae212]

electron being haha

[@Liberty4Ever]

This is more legit than half of the local ambulance chasing lawyer ads.

[@jaysonthespasian2563]

"You might need my services... cause I'm'ah sue ya." 😂 I love his straight forward honesty. I'll give him a call.

[@thathatguy1151]

I like the fact that he had to say "Molester Free" to describe his daycare services.

[@MasGood]

The problem is, we need more folks like this in society. They are opening lanes of opportunity for the less informed while owning and operating locally.

[@Rad-Dude63andathird]

....this is sketch comedy. I'm astounded you thought this was real.

[@Beaneabean]

@@Rad-Dude63andathird 😂😂😂😂

[@regalcartoon5932]

“Top notch, molester free daycare services.” I am wheezing 💀

[@Games_Graphics]

"Prepaid meaning you need to pay before"😂😂😂

[@RCFiddyOne]

After being stuck in the house with these kids during Corona, I'm ready to call him and send my children there NOW!

[@YourOldXBOX360]

😊 5 star service! He aided me in my case for violent armed robbery! My sentence was lowered from 8 Years and a $15600 fine to 8 Years and a $15500 fine! Just got out last year! Thanks Jones! Ps: Have another court date soon because i couldn’t pay of the fine in the specified time frame! Jones to the rescue!!! 😊

[@foxylovelace2679]

Nice to see this making the rounds. I'm so happy to see Jones' businesses thriving. I already enjoy his barbecue and foot massage restaurant spa.

[@DynamiteDaynaD]

I am astounded at the fact that whoever recorded this wasn't doubled over in laughter themselves. If I had been recording that there's no way I could have kept quiet!

[@hanabanyi6101]

"I work from volume so ya'll contiue to rob people and take stuff" this is the hardest i've laughed in a while. Lol

[@jonathanpeterson1984]

"IMA Sue you!" That's his business card fosho. 😂😂

[@chaitanyakotra3755]

"I'm on call, 3 hours a day, 5 hours a week" LMAO WHAT

[@ninersfan2112]

would definitely bring my kid here EVEN if he gets lost on the side of the highway

[@alvinyu2424]

ESPECIALLY if he gets left at the side of the highway

[@vitral2853]

Mon: Water Day!! Tue: Dinosaurs Wed: **Fill out W-2s**

[@nikosfilipino]

When the going gets rough you dont want a criminal lawyer, you want a CRIMINAL lawyer. *cue theme* -Jesse pinkman

[@flasponge]

This man is a NATIONAL TREASURE, THANK you so much for making me smile today seriously no one else has made me smile as much as you have in a long time thanks

[@katiesunder4622]

The people who are recommending us this stuff at KZbin 9 years later need a raise now

[@KevinP32270]

Agreed

[@KevinP32270]

I'm crying laughing lolololol