Jordan Peterson on Bad Bosses and When to Fight Back

[@blaugot]

Passive aggressive behavior from your boss is the worst. Clear leadership is everything.

[@Americus22]

@Roberto Murillo You quit.

[@dg-qn5mi]

Exactly they are the real crazy ones

[@jaydaranilla443]

@M walker Hey, how did it went? :)

[@plaguex1]

@@jaydaranilla443 probably fired. Bosses don't like being called out on their shit.

[@PeteS_1994]

@@plaguex1 Tbh it’s still worth it if it’s for your sanity.

[@ZakH644]

Life is too short to work in a job that you dread going too every morning.

[@theotherway1639]

There's a fun book called "30 Days to Stop Being a Shitty Boss" by Corin Devaso.

[@bookert.w2022]

Maybe leaving that job will make your life shorter.

[@plaguex1]

Unfortunately some have to deal with shitty people tho to even survive in today's society.

[@onzkicg]

True! Just realised this that no matter how huge is your heart to make room for “hoping for miracle to happen”- the variable is always the other third party /person (boss of colleague) who is adamant and unwilling to change. Thus, the saying is true- “Change starts from you”. (Change of environment/ work). There’s no point arguing or reasoning with someone who is biased and unwilling to admit their own fault/ arrogant.

[@AthenaLolita2]

Sometimes you just cant leave

[@stoneraristotle683]

Just had a fight with my boss. I just couldn't take it anymore. He was being loud so I became louder, I just downright insulated him infront of everyone, questioned his judgement, knowledge and ability to be on that position. Now I am sure of getting fired from the job. But I guess I needed that, enough of this mental harrasment I will find another job.

[@SFab-xv2tt]

any update?

[@stoneraristotle683]

@@SFab-xv2tt I resigned the next day. Thankfully already got a job with better salary. Will join next months.

[@shehnazakter717]

You are lucky to have another right after you quit But in our country Human Resource takes the advantage of an unemployed one by offering lower salary or even don't call for interview when they see there was a gap.

[@XuliusCaesar]

You insulated your boss? Is he an R20 boss now?

[@A5tr0101]

@@XuliusCaesar Boss is warm and insulated

[@derrys3085]

People need to stand up for themselves. Enough working for greedy employers.

[@dg-qn5mi]

Dude

[@theotherway1639]

There's a fun book called "30 Days to Stop Being a Shitty Boss" by Corin Devaso.

[@jaredschmidt8013]

@Victor Sibera I think you’re confusing alphas with tyrants. An alpha is someone who leads for others & inspires people to want to work for them. A tyrant is someone who leads for themselves & uses force to get others to work for them.

[@MattMussett]

Thats why starting your own business can help if your successful

[@DronesOverTheMoon]

​@@MattMussett Keyword: If and even then it depends on what type of business you are focusing as well

[@lostintranslation3367]

If you are unhappy with your boss, apply new jobs immediately. The bad boss will anyway lay you off eventually, just to hide his/her poor management skills.

[@NotFound-en5vx]

Fuck that the boss is the one who should leave

[@samuelnimaful8069]

@@NotFound-en5vx I like this. People need to learn to stand up to truth and learn to voice it respectively.

[@kix783]

Not always, there are plenty of ways to catch the boss out if they are really just incompetent. Make sure you are recording everything in e-mail, ensure that you are pro-actively asking for the resources, or training, you need to succeed in your role and ensure that you get a response back via e-mail, even if it's just you replying to your boss to say "Just to confirm, you spoke to me verbally about this and said...", if your boss tries to dissuade you just lightly push back that it's a perfectly reasonable request to have an e-mail communication so you can refer back to it to avoid any confusion or doubt, especially in a busy or chaotic role. In which time any unfair treatment or breaking of agreements, contradictions or other such things can all be documented, just be sure not to make your move until you have amassed enough that puts it beyond all reasonable doubt who is at fault. Sure, HR will always tend to start out favouring management in the interest of doing their job, which is protecting the company, but unless you are particularly high up, your boss is just another employee from the perspective of HR and if said boss is causing the company problems in such a way that could really backfire on them, well, the sooner they get rid of that problem the better, one way or another.

[@avapilsen]

@@kix783 Thanks for this. I will do this.

[@whitepod]

true

[@theclaybeartravels3596]

Most people agree to a job but they never agreed to work for a tyrant.

[@oldskoolordie]

When being taken for granted and being held to a different standard to others then I think its ok to fight back by trying to leave and putting in the least amount of emotional investment as possible. Sometimes a workplace is toxic and so broken you cant fix it. You can make yourself ill by worrying and in this instance just do the least amount of work acceptable and adopt what everyone else does. Bizarrely being a great worker in a broken workplace will get you nothing but hassle and you will get used by doing the work of the sycophants and bad workers and getting zero credit.

[@oldskoolordie]

@@trtrhr its awful and usually down to a few individuals what annoys me is the normal people acting as if nothing is wrong.

[@kvothethebloodless8090]

There are others out there!

[@uncledrew7633]

I literally just quit my job because of someone like this. I came to work everyday on time was a good co worker all my coworkers liked me, I cleaned half of their car wash tunnel by myself. He got mad because I was waiting for a car to come through in 30 seconds and clocked me out. U can curse me out but when u start clocking me out for work i minus well not be there. Sorry not Sorry🤷🏾‍♂️

[@MrFelian]

So very true..

[@samlnt]

U just summed it up for me thats exactly what's happening I am head and shoulders above my super seniors at work they are afraid of my talents but my dept head uses me without giving credit

[@MrOsasco]

Correct. The only surprise a bad boss deserves is your resignation, but only when you conquer a better job.

[@ernestomenendez9307]

There is no honor in business world. Often bosses dismiss and abuse employees with the excuse that is just business, sadly employees accept these things without challenging, even justify them. It's a system we have to start challenging it till the point we get of rid of bosses attitudes.

[@davidedemasi4424]

that's right, the end goal is getting rid of bosses, not bosses attitudes. Their condescending attitude is the result of the title we give them.

[@jasonum9267]

Then why don't you guys start ypur own businesses and become the type of boss that you want?

[@KevinSmith-xt8xr]

I remember a dude shot his boss and then took his own life. It was at that moment everything is temporary

[@dimitrifyodorovickaramazov]

I really don't know what I would do if it was not Jordan Peterson. It gives me goosebumps how accurate he is describing the situation. Look at this sentence: ''The point is not yelling or telling oyur boss everything you think of. The truth is trying to figure out the very very difficult process of how you put yourself in a better position.'' This was something I unconciously knew to be true, but could never articulate the way he does. The amount of help I get from JP is ridiculous. Thank you sir, just thank you.

[@jacquelinevega8495]

Peterson is spot on with the using resentment as a strategy point. I felt under-appreciated for my work at my last job. I updated my CV and would apply to 40-50 jobs every few weeks. I figured out the ratio for application:interview was about 20:1 give or take. I had about 15-20 interviews in a span of 1 year. I decided I would accept every interview even if I already knew I didn’t want the job, to perfect my interviewing skills and get over myself. Out of 20 or so interviews I got about 5 job offers. One which is my current job and best job I’ve ever had. I “steeled” myself for rejection just as he said. Knowing that if I kept evoking eventually a good thing would come.

[@mohamedmagdy3697]

Wow!!!!! Thanks so much for your comment!! this is so inspiring!!! I will start to do the same.

[@destroyerinazuma96]

I work in a sector where there are only so many employers and positions. I would literally have to do a skills analysis and think about jobs I have no experience in but use certain skills that are "cross-skills" so to say. I know ppl from my field who ended up working for an insurance company. And obviously the whole process is complicated when you suddenly have to think what kind of job that's not in your immediate sector you could find enjoyable.

[@KilothATEOTT]

90% of effective management is having your employees like you or at bare minimum not hate you.

[@mohamedmagdy3697]

Well 90% of management not applying that! and this is the shit truth! Companies are ok with crap managements and never care about employees.

[@MarkL-we8uk]

I find that starting by making it crystal clear that whilst being fired or quitting is nothing more than a minor inconvenience which holds zero fear for me is an incredibly powerful tool to negotiate with.

[@KO-im6sm]

Just because someone has the boss title. Doesn’t mean that employees have to tolerate discriminatory behavior. Sometimes, you have to call it out. Some bosses tend to bully. When you leave the company, you don’t need his recommendation. Most people asks their boss to help them get a new job. Most bosses are hired because their buddies gave them a job and they have no management skills

[@davidtrail2696]

I told my boss I could get another job but broken bones (his) would take a long time to heal. Life is too short to put up with assholes.

[@Butterflyyyy9]

Right

[@WithinMyLane]

Damn I wish I could say something like that 🔥

[@haizeabezala]

I agree. One of the best way to let resentment towards a crappy boss is to improve your position. The more educated and experienced in work and life, the better. And think about it: Chances are that, even if you yell at them, they won't change and will forget it as fast as the bury you professionally and socially, if they can. There's a lot of bosses with narcissistic traits. Be careful and avoid impulsive acts.

[@samuelnimaful8069]

So why don't you think when you well they will forget it too? People need to stand tall and fight. You're fired you move on.

[@lukehart7225]

@@samuelnimaful8069 he’s not a boss but today I had a training course and the coach was treating me like shit, so was the other people too.

[@samuelnimaful8069]

@@lukehart7225 Sorry to hear that. How did you take it, Luke? Did you react?

[@lukehart7225]

@@samuelnimaful8069 during class I just sat there when he was trash talking, but when we had lunch-break, he told me to speak up, stop mumbling up, because I was eating while l was talking. So I said what I wanted to say to him then told him off and he backed up.

[@lukehart7225]

@@samuelnimaful8069 I know this is another reply but would you go in tomorrow, if he was trashing you?

[@veroleacock4645]

He's brilliant. Great strategies for those know at all bosses. Put yourself in a position to be above them. His advice about emotion is great.

[@kdurantulafan]

@Armenias Thunk that’s why no one liked your comment huh

[@kathleenfarris8710]

I stood up for myself to my boss when he was disrespectful to me under the guise of authority, I was carefully weeded out of my position from that point forward.

[@JLRialtoraised]

Kathleen watkins Someone who you thought was your friend probably wasn’t and was telling your boss everything...

[@bimboyaquino7091]

Never invest anymore of your emotion to this bad past.

[@markappleton4955]

Same.

[@nostalgia9338]

Holy shit that’s happening to me.

[@avapilsen]

Trust me, he did not even deserve you.

[@Convexhull210]

Find another job or transfer if you can. Those are really your best options. HR is gonna protect bad bosses.

[@mohamedmagdy3697]

HR are the worst!!

[@davidcoffman4202]

On there property

[@cmm9360]

HR is a joke, slimy middle aged scum bags

[@Bo0os47]

Play the game, be a hustler, take everything away from them and leave them zero hands then see the magic happens

[@zaxbitterzen2178]

Unfortunately there are boatload's of workplaces that are broken beyond fixing. Whether you're young/old there are entire societies of work environment's that are essentially dead-ends.

[@Krizbonz]

This goes beyond toxic bosses, this is deep wisdom, thank you 🙏

[@coolsx763]

Everybody always tells me to control my mind and my feeling. But they dont know that I am treated like I dont belong, my boss really shows me how she doesnt like me and no matter what I have done and how hard I have tried there'a always a way for her to find my mistake and scold me infront of everyone. And she only do that to me. But the worst of it all is that I cant juts quit. I hope I can because I am so desperate, but I cant, I need money, I am the oldest son in my family, and at this time it is not that easy to find another job and how if quit just make me fall into even another worst job.

[@mungbean6693]

Praying helps dear

[@MJ-tb4sx]

breaks and have a great time l, don't even talk about work if no-one else brings it up socialize during break times, enjoy your days and try and win the day each day, if the boss is being an a**hole, don't react, hold your nose and your breath and let them smell their own shit then when their done, simply take a breath and say okay no problem etc, dont react, then go about continuing to win the day.

[@grandexporter]

... My favorite part about my job ... Is quiting after i reached my finacial goals😂😂🤷🏻‍♂

[@Sweetheart0189]

This is me next month!!! 😂 I’m OUT

[@brianreddick1474]

I always make sure to go out like that as well 💯

[@fitnesssoup7553]

I’ve had my share of bad bosses. I imagine there’s a lot of bad ones for a variety of reasons. It took me over 40 years to figure out how to deal with situations and challenges better. Two things have helped me in particular. Acceptance and respecting their position. We’re not going to change them. Most reject the behaviors except that’s not going work. If they’re a snake, treat them like one. Respect them and at the same time don’t show fear or demonstrate being a threat. Instead be an asset to whatever capacity you can be. Imagine you’re working for a different boss, supervisor or another superior if you have to as these things along with defensiveness can become habit forming. Again, respecting their position. You might be wondering how in the world the incompetent, inconsiderate, possibly horrid schmuck/schmucktress even came to hold the position! Truth is there’s lots of incompetence and terrible relating skills in the world. Be a contrast. Be the levelheaded, competent servant. It’s not that what you are experiencing isn’t relevant…it IS. Just understand that people can’t be changed and rarely do. The best way to ride a horse is the direction that it is going. By embracing things as they are, the better we negotiate them. It comes down to responding rationally instead of resisting and reacting. In this way we gain more influence of what we’re confronted. Viewing things from a third person’s perspective like in a movie helps too. You’re a character in the movie and you’re wanting the character to act in it’s best interest making wise choices demonstrating self-discipline and poise however challenging it might be. Emotional maturity. Adeptness at negotiating through conflict. There’s some pretty crappy management out there for sure. Just remember, part of the job title you can attach to yours is expert conflict negotiator. Keep learning in this regard. Ultimately the only thing we can do is adjust, adapt and keep on honing our skills in dealing with the inevitable b.s. in life. There’s plenty of it out there. Few are fortunate to not have to deal with very much of it. Life is hard. Having empathy is helpful as well. As does focusing on one’s breathing. Best to you!

[@audrajeanrussell8066]

I wish I could copy/paste your comment & hang it up in my office where no one else could see it (but I could, every day!) What you said hit me right btwn the eyes - esp the part about being the wise, competent servant (that part hits biblically too lol) Fortunately, my actual Boss is an incredible person & leader. I continually walk away from every interaction we have truly thankful & amazed by her, both personally AND professionally. She's a fair, trustworthy & excellent leader. HOWEVER, she recently promoted one of my coworkers to Office Lead (who is a nice enough person in her 60s....but is a TERRIBLY passive-aggressive & power-tripping sort of leader who seems to have chosen me as her preferred target.) She is CONSTANTLY doing little things in an attempt to denigrate me and/or elevate herself over me, esp in front of/intentionally within ear shot of other employees in our office (ex. constantly interrupting ONLY ME in meetings, going out of her way to correct me when it's not even necessary or appropriate, seeking me out to give unnecessary extra work/tasks/assignments, stopping me in the middle of the work day....only to loudly order me to do what she can CLEARLY SEE with her own eyes that I'm literally ALREADY DOING whatever it is, finding little reasons to chide/talk down to me in front of other team members, treating me as though I'm incompetent and/or talking down to me in a "mom voice" as though I'm her child/being naughty, etc.). I don't have any issues with her personally........but these behaviors (esp now that she has a role of some authority) are triggering as hell for me personally (as I was raised by an over-bearing, controlling, perpetually-fault-finding & passive-aggressive covert narcissistic mother). While I realize these triggers are neither my new Office Lead's fault nor her responsibility to fix, I am struggling to figure out how to calm my body ITSELF down after each of these little behaviors she does triggers my involuntary biological fight-or-flight response. Once triggered, it makes it nearly impossible to think clearly so I can calmly process & handle the situation right there in the moment & it takes usually anywhere from 1 to 4 hours before my body chemistry has calmed back down again (at least enough to process what happened & figure out how best to respond - as opposed to simply reacting out of the anger/triggering, etc.) I'm old enough to realize that these types of "leaders" are going to be anywhere you go these days; But 💥💥💥HOW💥💥💥 do you actually go about respecting someone's position when that PERSON THEMSELVES doesn't actually DERSERVE your respect (or esp when - as in my new Office Lead's case - they are continually trying to publically coerce and/or extract it from you by force)??? I've had private discussions with this person about the way she treats me/naming & giving examples of these specific behaviors, but it has so far fallen largely on deaf ears (although, she did privately admit to me these behaviors of her's are also a problem in her personal life as well - her kids have the same issues with her treating THEM this way too, apparently). I've tried to give grace & I make it a point to not give any reason for her to feel threatened/provoked (ie. I only give push-back if I've already given grace first & now feel I must respectfully stand my ground when the same behavior has now become a pattern of repeated [esp PUBLIC] boundary violations on her part, etc.) And before you say so, talking to my actual Boss (for all her admirable qualities) did not go well - despite my concerns for our new Office Lead being spoken calmly & intentionally interwoven with grace. My Boss seems unable/unwilling to see her new Office Lead's toxic behavior as the ACTUAL problem, but instead seems to see me having any issue with being TREATED this way as the problem (if that makes sense). I'm at a loss, but your comment gives me hope that maybe you've found the answer to this kind of situation even though I haven't & I'd really like to hear your feedback, if you wouldn't mind... And yes, breathing helps....but only so much. Lol (esp when being repeatedly triggered throughout the work day)

[@fitnesssoup7553]

@@audrajeanrussell8066 I’m sorry that you’re experiencing that with your coworker. Passive aggressive behaviors can be tough… It’d be easier if the person were to be direct and assert. It’s very much a conditioned way of relating. There’s a saying, the best way to ride a horse is the way it is going. We know that we’re not going to change her. We can adjust our responses. You have to decide for yourself if her toxicity is something that you can work with or if it’s simply too toxic. I’m sure it’s exasperating for you…I’m just about to start work. I’ll add some additional thoughts sometime later.

[@fitnesssoup7553]

@@audrajeanrussell8066 It takes practice. By letting acceptance be your ally it’s going to help your interactions. Three books that I’d recommend are Talking To Crazy and Just Listen (Goulston). And, Never Split The Difference (Voss). Also Be Water My Friend (Lee) is a good one. I have the audio book version of each. Les Carter here on KZbin might be of use to you. It’s hard to say whether your coworker is particularly toxic or doesn’t know better. That she is older, perhaps you could generate some cooperation on her part by inquiring what her perspectives are where you legitimately think she has knowledge/experience. There’s a variety of things you could employ. It’s an earnest effort that you demonstrate to improve the relationship and help to achieve your objectives together. Lol…You might be thinking right now, yeah right this situation is a heck of a lot more complicated than that! It might even feel hopeless. Difficult people can teach us. It’s frustrating. It might even seem impossible. What might make the impossible possible? If she wasn’t problematic, that would drive you toward learning new skills! Implement using a considerable amount of empathy. Being empathetic is not agreeing but viewing things from another’s perspective. Breathing techniques are sometimes useful. Be curious about her behavior. Resist reacting through observing and then responding. A little strategic indifference at times. Go to work every day knowing and accepting that some crappy interactions are going to happen AND that it’s going to be a good day anyway regardless what transpires. Sand flowing through an hourglass 1 day at a time.

[@angelgonzalez8678]

I needed this. Thank you

[@weontaekna9565]

Wow. These comments are just what I needed. Thank you both..

[@annastone5624]

I love this differentiation between ‘playing the game’ and ‘participating in unethical behaviour’ or ‘being tauen advantage of’ Almost everyone I know who tells me I need to ‘play the game’ are all very grey in their principals and would quite happily participate most unethical or dishonesty if they could gain from it. Having principals is what helps us avoid stepping on what can be a very slippery slope..

[@ubtrapper3077]

What he is suggesting is very accurate, however, it takes an extreme amount of patience to set a strategy and follow it through. Most people I know (including myself) don't have that kind of patience. I really don't think this guy has ever experienced working for a difficult boss or company.

[@cmxfitness6577]

Meybe he has, maybe he hasnt. Ultimately, hes giving advice that can and most likely WILL rectify the situation. Your ability to follow it through is down to you. If someone put a gun to your head and said "do this for 2 months, no matter what happens or the trigger is getting pulled", I guarantee you'd sit through whatever it took, till he end. Your own values and oppinions of the world, and your ability to deal with what it throws at you day to day, dictate your ability to deal with the variety of what it throws at you. At least thats what I think anyways 👍

[@morsmagne]

I'm in a situation where I have a boss who's basically crap. I feel so much better that I've planned an escape route. It means that I can still work for the shitty boss because I know that the course I'm going on is 99% likely to get me a better job in 2 years. That sounds like a long time, but as I learn from the course, I'll steadily know more than my boss. That feels good. One day, I might end up being her boss!

[@MetalAllDayAllNight]

You mean the guy who fought his University over freedom of speech hasn't dealt with a bad boss? Lol.

[@hetedeleambacht6608]

@Honestly, I don think you contribution was off-topic at all, on the contrary. How on earth you continued doing your job at your level, despite your health problems....is just admirable.....people take this for granted...If you break a leg, people understand if you work less hard or stay at home. If it something in your head, well god knows.....they don have any idea how to judge what you can handle and what not. And if you tell them exactly what is the matter and what you can and cannot do, they `re likely to misinterpret it, underestimate the severeness, to `forget` what it was about or don `t draw a string between you physical complaints and what going on in your head (at least in my working environment or other environment)

[@thirdgen377]

@Ubtrapper You're an opinionated buffoon if you really think that.

[@melania105]

His advice is not wrong but it's more like a long version of "just suck it up". I'm not telling people to quit jobs right away if they really need money but if it's something you absolutely can't stand anymore, just call it a day and call your boss an asshole, if you think he/she deserves it, some people need a reality-check sometimes for their brains to work normally. Making a plan for future is fine, but most people don't work for some famous or big corporate, their jobs are easier to find. And even if you're a pretty competent guy/girl of an average/big company, always remember your self-worth, you may not choose to be rude but you can politely refuse to be treated badly.

[@RP-dy5mu]

"some people need a reality-check sometimes for their brains to work normally." Which doesn't benefit you at all. You'll be gone by the time your reality check sets in so it is entirely and utterly pointless to your professional growth. Just work on your education and fuck off the company, leaving them in dire straits trying to find a good replacement.

[@avapilsen]

He's not saying to quit. He's saying get another job if possible. And tjays pretty good advice.

[@Blaberbomb1208]

Thank you

[@jaundicepinion8911]

Swallowing pride and eating crow is why employment is crap. Playing the game makes you no better than a bad boss. It makes you a coward giving in to bullies.

[@ThirdCouncilArt589]

💯

[@danie4819]

I wanted to quit my first day working at my current job. My boss is a gossip queen and creates division. It took me almost 3 years to finally found something. I tried changing department a few times but I don't know what she said to them that may cause me to not be able to change but finally I applied out of the company and got a call right away.

[@yimveerasak3543]

I'm facing the same situation. Already 7 years hanging on. I'm happy you could escape.

[@SkaterTE]

I’m a housekeeper for 6 years already and I’m 25. I just blowed up both of two boss today at Marriot telling us housekeepers that were slow but my patience was over today. I feel bad that I’m the only born us citizen and the only one that speak and understand English. They send me home but I know my co workers were happy for me to speak up for them.

[@christinamorales6887]

You put all your energy into finding a new job and put your focus there and keep telling yourself you’re working on it and it will come.

[@HeavymetalHylian]

What if I love my job, but my boss treats me differently from my coworkers in a way that makes me afraid to show up to work? Whenever I make a mistake or misunderstand, my boss complains to me about it, but doesn't give me the opportunity to fix my mistake and I therefore never learn to do it correctly. Sometimes I misunderstand and do something wrong and my boss makes a scene in front of my colleagues. It makes me feel small compared to my coworkers and it's distracting me from being able to perform well throughout the day, so I make even more mistakes. I really want to excel at work and I care a lot about what my position can do for the people in my community, so I don't want to leave, but I'm afraid that maybe it's not worth the treatment. I've been getting fewer hours than my coworker who has the same position as me and even after complaining to HR, nothing has been done about it.

[@alexanderwood3465]

This is exactly the situation I've had at my own work for several months now, my advice? Quit, before it takes your mental/physical health

[@MM-zj8be]

Ty

[@lee19003]

You can raise what's called a grievance if you cannot sort this issue out yourself. Then you can ask someone above your boss to step in. Bottom line is tho people always have personal preference when it comes to who they like. If the grivence doesn't work it would be time to look for a place that values you as an employee good luck! 🙂

[@user-zy8gk2nn7d]

He will fire you soon so it is better to do it first. You are his scapegoat and he hates you.

[@eisenhower9069]

@@alexanderwood3465 thank you

[@yukiruk5861]

My boss told me today to get help from a new recrutee. He did this in front of another co-worker. He always forgets whatever I had done before and undermines my work. He always says that I'm not working enough. I've had enough now. I always respected him and never talked behind his back unlike my co-workers. I always followed his orders. But enough is enough.

[@rockstarofredondo]

Sounds like the perfect opportunity for quiet quitting.

[@APFC95]

Dr Jordan just laid out all of my ifs, buts and fears. But, he also gave me hope and courage in laying all this out

[@D-Man666]

If you are taken into the office for any reason, make sure you use the voice recorder app on your phone to record everything, make sure the app is on your homescreen for quick access, and if you think you'll be seen opening the app, just say that you need to get a glass of water or you need the toilet before you go in.. stall and make time to open the app and hit the record button, put the phone in your pocket with the mic at the top so it gets the clearest sound possible... The boss' office is like their home, they feel safe and in control there, this is where they will slip up whilst bullying you! Just keep calm and don't back down if you're in the right.

[@Snakeyes11123]

I’ve gotten into it with my boss several times over the past year. She tells me “you’re not usually this combative and argumentative, usually you’re quiet and don’t cause problems” I walked out twice the other day, she told me if I walk out again then I’m done forever. I stayed. I sat in the parking lot and cried for 20 minutes. I don’t have a manager I can talk to to tell them how I feel because they won’t listen. Just tell me there’s nothing they can do

[@FoundSheep-AN]

Apply in another office or another job A female boss is the worse

[@workinabroad]

Why stay? Quit and move on. There are a plethora of employers. She did this, likely, because she believes you have no one but her...

[@noyarttt]

I have had this said to me too. I remember it clearly, it was after our winter holiday and I came back thinking "you know what Im gonna think more about my work-life balance" and started to say no o unpayed overtime. It didnt take long before my boss used “you’re not usually this combative and argumentative, usually you’re quiet and don’t cause problems” speach. and even put me in a meeting with the CEO. The talk was very "it should be okay to work 30-60min to finish a job...unpayed". I being a doormatt still work there and worked overtime. One month ago I went into the wall. Was home sick for a month, feeling shit. No Im pulling all my strings, because im out. Gonna resign soon. Fuck this place.

[@bloocifer]

Your boss is a narcissist who is talking to you like a child. Leave the job. Block their number.

[@rockstarofredondo]

Let them fire you so you can at least attempt to collect unemployment?

[@laprepper]

I will tell everyone the secret to finding a job and it's something that I've learned gaining over a dozen different jobs in several different industries, the job that you get will be from an application you send on a day that you are tired of not having a job, and there's something in the magic about that one application that the person reading it understands that you're ready to start working again.

[@gaurikris9420]

It happened to me

[@sparklewine]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

What an absolute shower of wisdom and practical advice. Thanks for this. I needed this.

[@nataliarygiel453]

I appreciate this because sometimes it’s about saving yourself

[@ismaelmasso6662]

This video should be watched 100 times by anyone

[@saltycanadian6190]

Yesterday my boss screamed at me because I sent a application to his manager for promotion instead of him. And said he was tired of my shit screaming at basically where customers could hear if they were there. So I quit left got a job for four dollars more an hour within two hours. And now I’m sending thank you emails and text to the managers he hired me and legitimately save my life when I was going to be in a penitentiary if they didn’t give me the job. I couldn’t think of any other way to leave with more respect for the company because the only reason why I’m leaving us to managers if it wasn’t for them I would’ve stayed because the entire companies fucking amazing

[@sstritmatter2158]

Jordan Peterson is SUCH A GENIUS. I really like listening to this guy.

[@parsajanaki7203]

On 4/5/23 I lost my job for standing up for someone else when he singled out this specific person In a meeting and when I tried to call him out on that he got angry and fired me he was the most toxic manager I’ve ever had the displeasure of working for I truly hope he gets what he deserves he showed no remorse

[@ДаДа-п8о]

Sometimes you need to stand up to yourself and drop this psychology shit . Find a job but if your job is very toxic affecting your health quit and if your boss was bad to you make a scenario for him and keep always your integrity . If you lose your integrity you lose yourself and you become sick .

[@kelseymariecrawford3781]

"If you lose your integrity you lose yourself" 👏👏👏 Yes.

[@emersonmena5106]

Literally got sick as I lost myself

[@destroyerinazuma96]

There is a channel called Healthy Gamer where in a vid about quarter life crisis (often correlated with a job one hates) the host says that the goal of the exploratory process post--realization is search, not necessarily finding a new job right away. Therefore in some cases it is fundamental one cuts ties with their old job. There are various theories on how many months worth of savings one should have beforehand, but imho if one is in a country and a sector where finding new employment in a year isn't too hard, there are savings for a year and the old job is just soul-crushing, then leave. I can 100% understand the advice for the safer option of finding a new job first, but some people truly need some space, and I'm not even talking a 10-month vacation. Some need coaching or intense therapy or going hiking to Peru for half a year. It's no small feat to engage in soul-searching. Sometimes you need to hit the pause button, and sometimes that entails quitting without another job lined up.

[@laprepper]

I wish I had known about the 99% rejection rate when I was in finishing school, I literally applied to 200 jobs before I got the job that I got but I always knew that I would never give up until I found one and that's kind of the attitude you need when you want to build a better life is that you just don't give up

[@moontide3943]

What did you go to school for, if I may ask?

[@destroyerinazuma96]

In another video Peterson said that the people just sitting around waiting for opportunities will be blind to those that come their way. The first non-internship job I found was after replying to an offer of a company I didn't know to exist. I had done a few dozen applications beforehand, and I even had another employer potentially interested in taking me in. But if I had waited for the day I'd randomly stumble upon that other job offer I wouldn't have been able to write the cover letter nor send an updated CV. Continuous applications in spite of the 99% refusal rate is not just useful due to low odds of getting a job, it's it's the only way to stay alert and with arguments in your favor ready for when opportunities present themselves. My mother called this (jokingly) the firefighter who trains all the time. Cause if they sit on their ass and suddenly there's a fire, they're not in any shape to address it.

[@ZFG22]

I work with a Boss who doesn’t want his subordinates to grow. We dont have freedom. Our off days are always compromised. It makes it difficult to even plan outside work. Life feels like a stand still and it’s painful 😓

[@diletao]

Wish I can help you

[@samkhan3904]

Start your own business, that's my advice

[@SciPunk]

Quit, that's no life, that's enslavement

[@davidedemasi4424]

The only way to go is join the revolution, Longa vida la revolucion!

[@angelo.florescu]

Sooner or later that boss is going to fall.

[@licksnkicks1166]

I really am disgusted by my bosses actions. She blatantly lied about something ethically important to us at staff meeting. I called her out on a something and found out from upper management that it was a big fat lie. She did get in trouble over this. I am sticking it out. 3 more years until I retire. Not looking for a new job.

[@adrian3355w]

Sometimes you need to play the game. Sometimes you need to get the F out. Consistent bad treatment calls for the latter.

[@latebloomer6967]

i'm an introvert who doesn't like to chat alot, i also have a soft feminine voice like Michael Jackson did and because of this people at work mistake me for being a pushover or something and they tend to get mouthy , i can't stand idiots who think they smell weakness so they go for the throat because they think that's the moment to feel dominant for once in their pathetic lives, but i'm no lamb i'm quite the opposite, i just don't like to make a scene, i prefer to let my actions do the talking so i'll just quit by text message and block all their numbers

[@HoodChicTheeSoloWorldTraveler]

Okayyy Ms. Wednesday Addams 🍎❤️

[@eisenhower9069]

I like you. I'm like this too

[@yaxixi3882]

Tmr is my last day , I resigned during my probation from a very difficult boss. It's not easy.

[@Hanka1981]

My former boss. Brutal, evil and she will never be happy, so much rage full of jealousy, her way or the highway and she’s so toxic.

[@Ohio_Greg]

this is my current boss.

[@LH74]

My boss is not bad for the most part, but he is obsessed with tardiness. It’s enough to cause me a lot of anxiety. It’s enough to make me look for a new job.

[@lazarusblackwell6988]

Having a strategy to your action is very useful. When i was younger i used to be impulsive and saying people how i feel about them and that didnt work out for me. After i decided to be strategic about my intentions and actions i really progressed.

[@StormRaid417]

I just delt with this exact situation a couple of nights ago. My best advice is to get to know people higher up on a personal level whether it's through friends or family. You're better off having a team of your own that can make a change in the workplace. My biggest concern is the leads and supervisors not communicating with their workers. The place that I'm working at now has an area of the factory where they say they don't have to communicate. Well, that could get someone killed and that's also why the turnover rate is so high. The work isn't bad. It's these power tripping leads and supervisors that are the problem. It's a good thing I know people way higher up in this business that can make a real change because these so called leads and supervisors don't care about safety.

[@uncledrew7633]

I literally just quit my job because of someone like this. I came to work everyday on time was a good co worker all my coworkers liked me, I cleaned half of their car wash tunnel by myself. He got mad because I was waiting for a car to come through in 30 seconds and clocked me out. U can curse me out but when u start clocking me out for work i minus well not be there. Sorry not Sorry🤷🏾‍♂️

[@avapilsen]

Wow, he can't even legally do that.

[@jaientenduunevoix726]

God I love Jordan Peterson

[@SpataWorks]

My old boss was a recovered alcoholic who honestly just switched for cannabis but it really shows how someone who cant control their life will impose their will onto others and control them when given the chance to compensate

[@TK-fm5ud]

I don’t want to leave my job; I want to have a better working relationship with my boss because I feel under-utilised and demotivated.

[@thatr0ryt133]

It is so hard I feel the same. Any time I talk about more responsibilities or changing things they get defensive and insulting.

[@angelo.florescu]

@@thatr0ryt133 that is because the boss is insecure. A good boss listens to ideas and is humble by understanding sometimes he/she is wrong. However, these people think that they are weak if they are wrong and want to control everything because of their insecurity.

[@MrSilver2nd]

A challenge is in the judgement of a higher peace and order that one risks breaking the rules over. Context becomes very critical in these types of conversations and the example that Jordan gives in regards to the sheep is for quick reference yet not so simple. If breaking the "Sabbath" will not lead to more dire or catastrophic results and one is certain of it then saving the sheep is morally permissible IMO. However if one can foresee a series of consequential and undesirable outcomes as a result of breaking the "Sabbath" then the choice is clear as the higher peace and order outweighs the life of the sheep. The dilemma occurs when it is no longer a sheep but a human being and instinctual or impulsive reactions in the moment take over... It's is complicated and limited by the individual's ability to quickly assess, discern, calculate and respond but even then all that is trumped by one's ability to overcome quickly the innate impulse to act.

[@xiding2086]

as long as you start to take actions your resentment immediatly decease even if you are putting yourslef in a bitter situation.........totally agree!!!!!

[@lilysmith9130]

He didn't give one inch of advice except to get another job. Fuckin genius.

[@MrMastrsushi]

Good therapists don't give direct advice. They train you to notice your behavioral patterns.

[@shewolf8771]

@@MrMastrsushi Yes, and at times you're dealing with a narcissistic, with them, you either grow bigger horns and go head to head or save yourself the time to be in a better place and walk away. Depending on if its worth the fight, be strategic about your move.

[@aspart2842]

Unfortunately there isn’t much you can do

[@freakyflow]

Started a new job at a bodyshop in a new city Been working at a former shop for 18 years Loved going to work each morning Put in long hours Me and the owner even had a few beers at the end of the day New place The owner for the first few days : Nice amazed at my work Even brought him a few new ideas on tools And ways to speed up production And cut costs Week later him asking me to drop what i was doing on one car And rush on the other Then run back to the other car etc etc Parts falling behind on orders Then him over my shoulder watching what i am doing Seen him yelling at a few others The one day him gathering around the workers Saying we are falling behind Work is not getting done We had a few cars come back When one of the workers said ..I waited a full day for parts even after i had taken the car apart The owner then was triggered and blamed him for the back log You should of got the parts guy to order the parts ..first thing this morning Not at noon..(The guy could not of known what to order till the car was apart And seen the damage ) From now on this is how it is going to be You order Then work on the car You stay untill the job is done Not at 5pm If you don't like that There is the door ...The worker turned and started walking...Anyone else? The painter smiles And starts walking ..Shocked the owner says Ok so tomorrow....I turn and start going to were my coat was hanging No way this owner just had a bad day This place is a rats nest Owner yells out What your leaving to? "Sure If you have the time to be over my shoulder mirco managing You have the time to do it better than i can" I'm saving you money yet again ....In my truck the 17 year old detailer headed to his car lol

[@JoeyVanVeenYt]

Must be a common thing. My panel shop boss was a psychopath/control freak with ocd. I put in 110% as his manager and made him alot of money but nothing was good enough, he took all the credit and told everyone i was stupid. He had me doing 6 different job roles and In the end when i said no to one of his ridiculous ocd fuelled requests he threw a chair at me. I walked but when i went back to talk he turned it on me and told me i had character flaws and should see a psychologist.

[@loislee2895]

I get what he's saying here. However, if you call up on the small things that cross boundaries or you notice things that could cause larger issues or grudges later, and by calling them out on the small things they explode or get defensive then I'm afraid to say the job and the boss will never, ever get better. Update the CV, find a different job and get out of there. The boss ain't changing for anything, doesn't matter how intelligently or delicately you approach the small things.

[@justanothergamerdude]

Im a breakfast cook. Ive started this job 3 months ago. The first 2 months were rocky due to personal issues (child custody battle. Child being sick constantly. Etc. . Racked up a few call outs, but nothing major) that being said. Lets go to the past 2 weeks where my attendance has been flawless and ive done everything asked. 2 other cooks are constantly late or just no call no show. Then we had a LINE LEAD quit and walk off mod shift, to which he recieved a 5 day vacation and kept all perks on return (perks being in a lead position after quitting) all the while if i was late i text an hour to over an hour before my shift starts (at 6am) to let the managers know. (Key note: march 8th i talked to the GM and asked for this sunday march 15th off, to which i got verbal confirmation) now today, im not feeling very well and tried to call out (again using enough time before my shift) to which i was cornered in a way that made me feel uncomfortable enough to show up to talk to hr about this entire thing. To which i was told if it happens again im fired. Is it fair i am treated this way, when the other 3 cooks can do whatever they want and not get into trouble. (Mind you that the only other white person on this line is the operation manager, whos so scared of confrontation that he wouldnt swat a fly away if it landed on his nose) there are other huge details. (One being 1 of the cooks in question asked for $1 raise yesterday march 13th to which he was told he would be given a bigger raise than he asked for, even tho hes always late and has admitted to multiple no call no shows before my employment at this facility.) I dont know the other cooks private conversations, but they 100% didnt have any negative body language regardling any sort of discipline, (i worked as a chef in a hospital and had to take classes on subliminal hints towards sex trafficking and a class on overall body language so we could discretely notice hints towards abuse of any kind and properly inform the needed personnel)

[@peterkaldanis9769]

@@trtrhr bro I could understand what you were saying but you really need to improve your grammar, doesn't flow well. I say this from a point of positive reinforcement so that you will improve. Cheers !

[@twentynineelevenpodcast9283]

This is happening with me right now, where I have to be very careful how I speak with my boss and be wise in how I do things.

[@DEUTSCHLAND.007]

Peterson's intellect is beyond amazing.

[@sner200]

This interview segment changed my life! After writing this comment, I'm transcripting it, print it and put it on the hallway wall! Best J. Peterson video (in my day and age)

[@sner200]

Transcripting the video of course...

[@pauls.2526]

When it comes to disagreeable people of authority at work. You may win the battle but you won't win the war.

[@kkman4053]

Jocko says play the game but I'm not so sure. It wastes time and I wonder how this tarnishes your soul and motivation for life. Heros dont compromise on their values. Like I couldn't imagine Jesus playing the game and working politics in the workplace. " My kingdom is not of this world"

[@CHRISTisKing197]

Jocko has no integrity and endorses kissing a douchebag bosses ass. Jocko's way is a way to self defeat and self destruction

[@RP-dy5mu]

"Heros dont compromise on their values." Maybe in movies. Life isn't a movie. Stop watching movies.

[@patricearruda]

I had my share of bad bosses. There are situations where I fought back and some I accepted it. You play the game enough for you to find a better opportunity and leave the current one.

[@emagm.2131]

I use to work in a lovely coffee shop, but then came a new manager and that nice place became not pleasant to work at anymore. That new manager was making rumors around, she was treating people in a different way. She didn't know how to manage a proper one on one meeting with employees that after they would feel motivated and encouraged. She was adding hours to some of her favorite people. I left this job cos I couldn't anymore to work there. Few months I couldn't work because of my psychological problems. When I was starting to work somewhere I was feeling that going to be the same and I dont want to go through it again. One of my colleagues went to a psychologist. This manager knew about it but she didn't do anything to improve her self or change smht. She became even worse. The manager was doing everything to read off my colleague which one went to a psychologist. So how do we need to deel with that kind of "managers" who are destroying others lives?

[@mentelatl]

There is nothing wrong and nothing more fulfilling than calling up your boss on their B.S. follow by an “I quit” and dropping the mic.

[@seanm7539]

And you know what that might be my next stop here within the next couple of months because this is some bullshit because I have a store manager who is a complete bitch

[@MomHomeMade]

Thank you Jordan Peterson

[@syngen462]

The worst is that my boss discriminates against me and others in my team because we suffer from depression. Three years prior, I was hospitalised for depression; however, in 3 years since, I worked hard, won a platinum award for exceptional performance, did work way above my role, and got high praise from other senior managers. Recently, I interviewed for one of 2 roles one level above my current position. Needless to say, I didn't get either. I have 12 years of experience and he chose 2 favorites, very Jnr and nowhere near my skill level. Of course, I am looking for something else. I let his behavior slide but I am laying a grievance against him for discrimination and unfairness. Even if I don't get the outcome I would like, I want to expose him because he plays an excellent political game. Many across the business are shocked I didn't get the promotion because I have a good reputation and brand and I have worked at a higher role size for many years now I also have all the relevant qualifications. I am playing the game as I will not give him a stick to beat me with but I am going to take this fight up through the official channels.

[@kevinedwards7079]

Mr Peterson sir Thank you for being who you are

[@iinpusparini9102]

im struggling with all of these for 1.5 years. im a 'yes man', and still. its difficult to say no. as a result i have burn out along with severe depression and severe anxiety. i have loss immediate memories several times. medications do help. the fact that the boss is insensitive, i have gone through these still. this is the worst time of my life.

[@catherine8326]

Thank you!!! What is it that you want? Strategic actions Figure out how to put yourself into a better position Quit whining & take it on You’ve compromised yourself Fix resume Look for different job, prepare Strategic Take genuine steps, be realistic Withstand rejection for jobs Get your life together You should do what everyone else does unless there’s a just cause! (Meta rule: Is it morally right?)

[@davidmcleish6664]

speak the truth and it will set you free!

[@DANNYPHNTM51]

Watched this at the right time

[@ywmy]

My boss will literally make fun of me for asking a question, when I've only been there for 3 weeks, then turn around and answer the same question from someone who's been there for over a year. Not sure if it's just the new guy hazing or what

[@Juliaa__T]

What about when you don’t hate the job but want to switch managers? That’s tough

[@alanbal888]

Cultural differences are really hard for me to deal with. I'm mexican and have worked with USA bosses and Indian bosses. USA are like-minded with us Mexicans and they have been the best leaders that I've had, the fact that my boss came from a military background also spoke so much about that. No politics, no passive-aggressive behavior, everything was clear as water. On the other hand, I've never had an Indian boss who was not constantly bullying the team, asking for free extra hours and no possitive feedback from their side whenever we achieved something. Those guys are really politics oriented and individualist.

[@Maverick.D.]

American bosses are nice to your face, but stab you in the back.

[@anakin_piewalker1458]

If you become a boss just know you’ll reap what you sow. Don’t think you can boss someone around forever

[@shimronnetia]

Thank you May God bless this chanel

[@moroccan0714]

After being moved to APAC team due a strategic market reorganisation by the CEO of an Irish company, I got to have a boss from bangladesh who has a boss from India with american passport, these two guys were weird and were together teaming up in a strange way (both corrupts) I was working smart and hard in my region, making great organic growth and kicking out competition like the hell... after a couple of month from joining the apac team, both guys started pushing me away and reducing my responsibilities in an unprofessional way and I ended by getting fired.... this happened in June 2018. Now it is Sep2021 and still burn and wait for the right time to revenge... and fight back..... they destroyed my life 😔😔😔

[@randomconsumer198]

I reacted to her passive aggressiveness and that got me fired. I hate that good people have to play this game. UPDATE: I ended up finding my dream job. With a dream boss and team. In the end I'm glad I stood up for myself against the bully boss. It killed my integrity and motivation acquiescing to her.

[@Mr-S.C.]

I've worked with the most awful unqualified idiot of a boss who got rid of me for no reason whatsoever. He wanted a promotion but didn't get it and complained bitterly about it. These morons are everywhere in business and my only advice is to avoid them like the plague.

[@rexxthunder]

Just get to a point where you are not living paycheck to paycheck. Have a year salary in investments that you can cash out easily or savings. you'll stop putting up with bullshit real fast and the odd thing is, they'll actually start respecting you more. I started speaking my mind more and thought I was being an asshole, but the owners of the place I work liked that I was open and honest.

[@sunnybreeze3391]

True. Brutal people get more doors open then being polite all the time.

[@ItsMe-sx9ck]

I just had a heated argument with my supervisor yesterday. First off all he is a micromanager and tired to control everything we do. He called me and yelled at me for someones fault. Then he started to shout out through the phone. I just remain silent and said i don't have to answer every question he ask me. Then he bacame more angry and threated that he will inform the management about my behavior. At that moment i have to defend myself. I pointed all the things he is doing badly and about company polices on this, he got very anxious and tried to tell me that he have hyper tension blah blah blah..finally just because of the advise of one the senior collegue i aploigized even thorough i didn't do anything wrong. Now, i really planning to look for a job (one was already on the way just waiting for the final call). For the mean time i will pretend like nothing happened as he said. I thinks its better to update yourself and always have a escape route ready. Otherwise you will be a prisoner.

[@janellinell4552]

So glad I found this channel

[@annettemcdonald1735]

Ah this video just stopped me from doing something stupid today! Thanks! 🙏

[@Guitarist789]

This is exactly what I needed to hear.

[@leticiavarga1009]

I don’t see eye to eye with my boss. I feel that she is not hardworking, is not engaged and I can’t learn anything from. When I request PTO, she denies it. And upper management supports her. I think it’s stupid and it should be a law in California that PTO must be paid if not use. So many employees are never allowed to take time off. What’s the purpose of having PTO if you can’t use it.

[@markappleton4955]

Here in uk that is illegal

[@sunstar4044]

Excellent explanation!!!!! PERIOD

[@terminusest9083]

What do you do when you've played the game for years and it's not getting you anywhere? It's fine working towards bettering the entire system or working towards a position that allows you some system control, but there are totally unbeatable systems. The problem is that there are lots of fields where the system can't really be improved by playing along- like education, or healthcare etc because if you play along you're going nowhere fast.

[@josephj6521]

Usually when a new boss joins our team in various organizations I’ve worked for, for some reason, I’m not liked!?! My previous bosses liked me and with reason: I DO MY work to a HIGH standard, I’m ALWAYS on time at work and I’ve had many customers/work colleagues who liked my work. I don’t understand why? They try to find the smallest indiscretion and try to ping me. If that doesn’t work, they try something else. I’ve even overheard my current boss praise another work colleague who does little yet refused to acknowledge my achievements. Yes, I’m doing work way above my pay grade. It’s tiring. Many say these bosses are threatened by me. Dunno? I’m at a loss but again, I feel I need you find a new job. I don’t put up with rubbish.

[@JocktanianWolf]

Nonsense. If your boss lacks a basic moral constitution you need to get out from under that. You will not starve. You will not die. You will not be homeless. Just be brave and leave and you will survive somehow. All this fear mongering about dependency on horrible bosses for a living is the reason horrible bosses exist in the first place. Let someone else be their submissive slave and free yourself. Fear of leaving a terrible person is nothing more than illusion. Period.

[@jeffsadowski7759]

Here's a great one for bosses who belittle others at work. When you're talking down to someone else, those emotions are going right back into your own nervous system and how you feel, about yourself. Geez, I guess God was pretty smart, after all. Speak highly of others, and you'll probably feel pretty good about yourself, too...Now imagine if we both made a habit out of it? Hmmm is right!❤😊

[@scarlettm86]

My goodness, did i need to see this today!