Julia Hladkowicz - Public Restroom Standoff

#JuliaHladkowicz on why she loves when her husband fights, dealing with IBS, and the most exhilarating spin class.
#JuliaHladkowiczStandUp from the Just For Laughs Festival in 2016.
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Just For Laughs is the world’s premiere destination for #standupcomedy. JFL produces the world’s largest and most prestigious comedy event every July in Montreal, as well as annual festivals in Toronto and Sydney. On this channel, you will find comedic clips from some of the most legendary comedians in the business: Chris Rock, Bill Burr, Kevin Hart, and more. We also feature stand-up from newcomers such as John Mulaney, Bo Burnham, and Amy Schumer. If you just want to laugh, you’re in the right place.

[@jasminehouston-burns1691]

Those standoffs are real. I had one recently that lasted like 10-15 mins.

[@clumsiii]

be the ice breaker! break wind first

[@missundies]

Next time just put on some loud metal song on your phone :)

[@MK-jw9xk]

Dedication 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@xanfus]

I say just go for it. Whoever starts it will probably finish first, and not have to risk any awkward eye contact later lol.

[@misslawless6021]

Its a facts

[@juliusgreat8526]

Not in the men's restroom. No retreat. No surrender.

[@AviChetriArtwork]

I am on the toilet. I'd fart my ass off.

[@shoresy6927]

Disagree. I've had these standoffs. Especially when I'm at work and people are having conversations at the urinals

[@petermcgill1559]

I like her She's unflinchingly honest and confident but NOT annoying at all. How refreshing. I like her :)

[@GirGir183]

I hate to burst your bubble about all these stories stand-up comedians come out with...but they're all made up. Not unflinchingly honest at all.

[@hotbam37]

why go for the middle stall if they are all empty? always go for the first or last stall, if someone walks in they will choose the one furthest from you. If you take the middle stall they have no choice but to pick an adjacent stall.

[@satagaming9144]

ah but you've forgotten, when you shit your brains out first, the two on your flanks won't know whether it is you or the person on the far side. and if another person caves first, then you'll know who it is and that it's okay to open the floodgates, since the shitting person won't care and the other person still won't know.

[@evelien135]

As an ibs person I can confirm this

[@Uatemydoodle]

@@satagaming9144 You can still tell.

[@satagaming9144]

@@Uatemydoodle Yes, but if you're on one of the flanks, the middle person always knows who caved first. I'd take the chance that one of the others wouldn't be able to tell (especially depending on how the bathroom is set up). Plus, you get the satisfaction of knowing who caved first, being in the middle.

[@Uatemydoodle]

@@satagaming9144 You can tell based on the acoustics if it's 1, 2 or 3 stalls away. Also, I'd rather not sit in the middle of a stink warfare.

[@digdoug9352]

Lol great set. I would love to walk into a public restroom and have heavy metal blasting. You know, set the tone, get rid of all those jovial pissers

[@losangelesnefastvs]

Twist it, bop it, pull it.

[@funkylentil6966]

WHY THE MIDDLE THOUGH?

[@Ehlaar]

Right weird

[@YRTEverything]

The idea is...yea, it was a bad idea.

[@littlemizredhead]

🙋‍♀️ I have IBS too, but I don't care who I may offend in the bathroom because EVERYBODY FARTS IN THERE

[@squigglyline6488]

Ibs is the worst! It's often genetic

[@MrPutrifyingEagor]

How refreshing! I loved her! Brutally honest & fabulous delivery, can’t wait until I see some more! And god damn I loved that dress she was wearing!

[@moontears3887]

It's hard to make me laugh out loud but with her I was rolling. She's awesome!

[@terea6866]

That was the best ad for spinning that I've ever heard! Now, I gotta go try it too. 😂😂🙊👀

[@missundies]

It's easier and more relaxing to just use the shower hose though 😅 And you don't have to leave your home!

[@bismuthcrystal9658]

Hm. Machine gun noises and heavy metal restrooms. Sweet Dee has gotten a lot funnier. Maybe now the joke's on us.

[@AngryKittens]

I let the faucet run while I'm pooping for exactly this reason.

[@jessicaj8564]

That does Nothing except waste water

[@AngryKittens]

@@jessicaj8564 It creates white noise. Unless your faucet is one of those silent types. Also I'm not Californian, so "wasting water" isn't remotely a concern since we have plenty of it.

[@hanifanunez2576]

How are you going to do that in a public restroom??? MOST of them have sensors so that you don't waste water.

[@AngryKittens]

@@hanifanunez2576 You're talking about the stall-style restroom, which I would never poop in unless it's an emergency. I'm talking about the larger toilets with no crawlspace, and a sink on each one. We have regular twisty faucets, because we're not draining a river dry in a desert state. Jeez.

[@jessicaj8564]

@@AngryKittens California does NOT have a water shortage?? Lol ok then

[@Watcher413]

I’m a trucker so I always wear Bluetooth. So whenever I use public restrooms I put in the earbuds and Blair some metal. I can’t hear anything happening around me and I’m in my little world for a few minutes. Makes it’s so much easier

[@cobraimploder]

May I ask what you play when you're in the shitter? Don't mind me asking. I'm just a metalhead who loves talking to other metalheads.

[@missundies]

I hope I can achieve this confidence one day 😂 I would probably put on some loud music on speaker. We mostly have real walls around or toilets here though instead of stalls, we also mostly have unisex bathrooms which I like.

[@Watcher413]

I enjoy cradle of filth or dark funeral while I pop a squat. Those are my usual go to bands.

[@baqcasanke]

Ive never had a problem letting a big ol turd loose in a public restroom. I

[@IanPatrickOfficial]

She reminds me of what Lacy Green's older sister would look like lol.

[@kerianpearson9796]

Her dress is so cool and I want one.

[@quantumperception]

"I'm Sweet Dee, and the jokes on me!" Seriously? Poops, butts, and vaginas. And sound effects; out of nowhere?!

[@TheWakeOfRedemption]

quantumperception I thought of that same exact thing lol

[@chickenpermisson1309]

honestly i don't find a lot of comedians funny, but i crack up until my stomach aches every time i watch this clip of this comedian.

[@ther6989]

Coincidence that Whitney Cummings is at the end of the video?

[@tykeishecaldcleught6105]

She is sttttuuuuuppppiiiddddd 🤣🤣🤣💀💀💀💀 Love her, straight forward

[@andersonash9059]

Such a silly goose.

[@DanSanChannel]

Why would you go in the middle stall?! I hate when people do that. I make sure to crap as loud as possible when I people does that. Just make it awkward as possible. Loud grunting and a little screaming like "AHHHH....GET OUT OF MEEEEEEeee! " lol

[@jasonland455]

Just play your own music while in the bathroom

[@shoresy6927]

Why are all women stand ups the same?

[@1536fm]

She is funny af 😂😂 😂😂 😂💀

[@maxolivia4911]

I have endometriosis on my bowel so I can't hold it if I need to go I need to go. People being so scared about pooping in public toilets is really dangerous for our health. But I have the same anxiety. I tend to try to enter quickly so no one sees me go in and then leave when the other people have already left so no one knows it was me. But I do think it's really silly that I still do this going on my mid 30's

[@puertoricanboy100]

Doesn't matter where you're from in this tiny world, you can just tell when people are Jews just by looking at their faces... she's definitely a jew. ✡️ But it was her last name this time.

[@inaynaycoleman]

So you should....avoid...tilting your pelvis forward if you want to....not...orgasm...duely noted

[@steveanderson7776]

This was hella funny

[@erikleirmo9147]

It should be mandatory for bathrooms to play metal 😂😂

[@mrmojomajestic8317]

" … and then all of our assholes explode " greatest punchline EVER !!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@mrmojomajestic8317]

"The other day I had an orgasm at the gym … Goodnight Everybody." 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Oh my God, I want to marry this woman and have her make me her bitch

[@garethbaus5471]

So the procedure in the ladies restroom is not like urinals, with urinals you always leave a space if you can especially if there are no dividers.

[@dreadlunero2414]

She's great

[@koko-timepassboy]

I am going to leave another Job because of IBS D lol.

[@KeritechElectronics]

Damn cool gal! I laughed SOOOO hard :)

[@Secopsco]

Divorce her whoever her husband is, in for some heartache...unless you're cool with her getting off with her cycle instructor.

[@squigglyline6488]

I thought that you were going to say her ibs would cause them to get divorce.

[@saraowens675]

.. it was the stimulation of the cycling. Not the instructor.

[@kurtsudheim825]

Honest & fun stories yes, but more cringe than tearing my stomach muscles apart. & That's what makes a top comedian

[@jessicaevans2564]

OMG, I hate the stand iff, so your business and pretend not to hear. I don't want both of to hear what my insides sound like lol.

[@rebeccahherdener2068]

Lmao. Wow. This is the first chick I've actually lol'd watching.😂 Some real life shit tho. Wonder what the instructor had to say about her workout experience.😂😂😂😂😂

[@pbsfinest2004]

Literally Dee from Its Always Sunny lol

[@tommyaudio]

LMAO omgggg 😂🤣😂🤣

[@LAMateo-hr4up]

I just realized those are her friends haha

[@Koudey]

Couple seconds later? That’s way too quick.

[@WebbanationX]

Died at the Mexican standoff

[@samcarney3254]

yet anoother "my vagina" comic

[@AuthenticWe]

Fuckin hilarious

[@MRWEDAWEST]

Didn't laugh a once. The streak continues...

[@GG-yy4yx]

She’s very funny!

[@RaquelFoster]

The stupidest thing ever is that EVERY office has white noise generators in the ceiling, so there's background noice everywhere, except they don't have them in the restroom! So you can just hear everything. When I'm in a standoff I make my own background noise by flushing the toilet a lot and wasting about 10 gallons of water. It really helps everybody. Except the planet.

[@MrHarryc727]

Boring

[@jonthompson7106]

Brilliant comedian! Love it!

[@user-pu5ri7up5b]

5 mg of codiene is what I take for ibs. Makes sex great not only does your stomach not hurt but other things are prolonged.

[@mrabrasive51]

Where do you get a dress like that!bass pro shop?

[@vilecorrupt]

The dressss

[@erikleirmo9147]

Yes they should play Pantera or lamb of god in the bathrooms expecialy when u know it’s gonna be bad and someone else walks in idk I don’t like pooping in public restrooms neither

[@darmillionaire]

0:50 No you didn't. That's violation of Rule 34.

[@jfrsnjhnsn]

F-.

[@davidp8359]

So funny

[@dv84sure]

Very lucky to somehow bump into this today. Julia - you are absolutely gut buster hilarious.

[@saika.magoichi.214]

Absolutely loved her!

[@brogsie]

Energy on that women is incredible and her jokes as well...🤸‍♂️

[@NoName-ip7qm]

But if you stop shooting first in a standoff, then you lost. the glory goes to the last one shooting

[@JSGuitar80]

Funny, weird and super cute. Her husband is a lucky guy.

[@pynchia4119]

OMG fart jokes! Bill Hicks was right

[@drowningfish7951]

That was fucking hilarious! 🤣🤣

[@dearonbursey1862]

I fucking love her😂💀

[@dreski83]

Awesome

[@Chris-yq3kp]

A standoff is won by being the last one standing. So actually you lost

[@darinhardie8514]

So it does exist

[@m.haynes]

Pooping in public is not as difficult as some people make it sound.

[@batissta44]

oh Madeline you so fine can I make you mine?

[@tedgey4286]

Ha!

[@topgurl9313]

lol!!!

[@steveross8326]

And so, the search for a funny female comic continues..........

[@vivalapaul]

Bonnie McFarlane is good.

[@vivalapaul]

Watch Bonnie's Comedy Central Presents or HBO One Night Stand

[@steveross8326]

@@vivalapaul Well, that's your opinion......I don't share it. Trying too hard to be 'out there' and confusing it with being funny.

[@kuroichan101]

With all the unfunny male comics out there its so annoying when guys act like only female comics are unfunny. Its just you cant relate to her.

[@anthonychavez2715]

Annoying.

[@derrickdiggs8612]

THICK.

[@mr.agigittygigitty9916]

Wow I usually don’t click on women comedians but im glad I did good job girl! 👍

[@after1001]

This what south park was making fun of re: female comedy

[@gekamanagement1071]

@Lee McDonald good counter argument buddy

[@BaronNate]

wow, a chic that was actually funny! Great set!

[@matthewfuller2309]

Omg women are sooo funny... 😑

[@retrofinity]

Cringe

[@Chris-yq3kp]

Oh and female comics arent funny. It's a law of the universe

[@thedeekabides]

>woman tries to be funny for nearly 8 minutes >quasi-racist poop jokes And women wonder why they make "7/10ths" of what we do...

[@baqcasanke]

Jordan De Knikker what on earth was racist about the poop joke?

[@littlemizredhead]

I can assure you that I work waaay harder than you do and actually do a good job. So sit your bitch ass down and shut the fuck up. How about THAT.