Jupiter Ascending Pitch Meeting

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Pitch Meeting

Pitch Meeting

Күн бұрын

Step inside the Pitch Meeting that led to Jupiter Ascending!
Subscribe for more Pitch Meetings: / @pitchmeetings
The Wachowski’s made history with their groundbreaking movie The Matrix back in 1999. But it seems like over the past 25 years they’ve never been able to recapture that magic, try as they may have.
Jupiter Ascending rdefinitely raises some questions. Like why is Channing Tatum half a dog? Is Jupiter even interested in anything that’s happening? Why does this movie do the exact same scene twice, back-to-back and beat-for-beat?
To answer all these questions, check out the pitch meeting that led to Jupiter Ascending!
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Our Website
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Пікірлер: 3 400
@dlxmarks
@dlxmarks 4 ай бұрын
A movie so inept that it couldn't even kill off Sean Bean's character.
@raskov75
@raskov75 4 ай бұрын
One does not simply allow Sean Bean to live.
@MichaelSBaram
@MichaelSBaram 4 ай бұрын
No no, look at his eyes, he's dead inside.
@assimilation9
@assimilation9 4 ай бұрын
Sean Bean said he planned to stop doing roles where he died after Game of Thrones. Apparently he thought it was becoming too predictable.
@BrigadoonZyphoon
@BrigadoonZyphoon 4 ай бұрын
The bee's kill him off-screen.
@utube7930
@utube7930 4 ай бұрын
Underrated comment
@TheNinthGeneration1
@TheNinthGeneration1 4 ай бұрын
“Are you off your meds again?” “Hey shut up dad” New lore just dropped
@stevenhayes7910
@stevenhayes7910 4 ай бұрын
😂😂
@Lukasaske
@Lukasaske 4 ай бұрын
Of course! Nepotism! That's why all the movies are terrible!
@zero11010
@zero11010 4 ай бұрын
They're already second cousins. If both things are true that ... says bad things about their family's dating practices.
@siraaron4462
@siraaron4462 4 ай бұрын
Or y'know... He's off his meds.
@TheSilverpuppeteer
@TheSilverpuppeteer 4 ай бұрын
@@Lukasaske Now that they mentioned it, I do notice a resemblance between the two.
@ThatDruidDude
@ThatDruidDude 4 ай бұрын
Really heartwarming to know, how benevolent Hollywood are giving 7 years old a chance to write script for their movies.
@Jordan-Ramses
@Jordan-Ramses 3 ай бұрын
Sounds more like chatgpt.
@skwills1629
@skwills1629 3 ай бұрын
Given Recent Revelations Benevolence May Not be the Word, Libido May Be... Hollywood Producers Like'em Young.
@jameswhitley4101
@jameswhitley4101 3 ай бұрын
@@Jordan-Ramses Except language model technology was still quite primitive back when this movie was made.
@Benjovi76
@Benjovi76 3 ай бұрын
I read that as heartworming, because he’s part dog
@APS_Inc
@APS_Inc 3 ай бұрын
This is insulting to 7 year olds
@DustyFox8
@DustyFox8 4 ай бұрын
"I thought he was part dog." "Yeah, but now he's got his wings back" Best line ever. 😅🤣😆
@swampThaang
@swampThaang 4 ай бұрын
Why is he still in the air while not flapping his wings??
@DocTheHawk
@DocTheHawk 4 ай бұрын
​@@swampThaangThey are synthetics given to warriors, not actual wings. The bee used to have them as well when they were in the royal army.
@alex.g7317
@alex.g7317 4 ай бұрын
@@DocTheHawkthose were words
@DustyFox8
@DustyFox8 4 ай бұрын
@@swampThaang cuz he's part dog. Dogs don't flap wings.
@peterkrug4124
@peterkrug4124 4 ай бұрын
Barf from SPACEBALLS made more sense than Caine Wise.🙄
@cydranzer6027
@cydranzer6027 4 ай бұрын
Still love the irony that in Jupiter ASCENDING she just spends the whole movie literally and figuratively falling.
@darasen66
@darasen66 4 ай бұрын
Watching the movie I commented that if she fell one more time we'd have to rename her Lois Lane.
@EmperorSeth
@EmperorSeth 4 ай бұрын
She spends so much time getting kidnapped in her own movie that Princess Peach tells her to give it a rest.
@AchedSphinx
@AchedSphinx 4 ай бұрын
movie best viewed while upside down.
@elfsong713
@elfsong713 4 ай бұрын
And ends up in the same exact place where she started.
@robertlee8519
@robertlee8519 4 ай бұрын
You have to watch it upside down
@AwesometownUSA
@AwesometownUSA 4 ай бұрын
4:42 in the article shown at the end of the video, mila kunis said she knew Jupiter Ascending would flop before they started filming. I just went and read the article, and she says she knew it would flop _because the budget was cut at the last minute._ mila, I’m sorry but the budget wasn’t the problem - no amount of money was gonna save this script / premise from itself! haha
@TF2CrunchyFrog
@TF2CrunchyFrog 4 ай бұрын
Agreed. They still had a budget for gorgeous costumes and tons of CGI in J.A. But if your movie has a bland main protagonist who seems to be sleepwalking through the story with a disinterested expression (same problem the Twilight movies have) and the script can be pulled apart by a few logical questions, the CGI budget wasnt the issue...
@syberslade3878
@syberslade3878 3 ай бұрын
@@TF2CrunchyFrog I want to agree but the Twilight franchise was very successful
@maguffintop2596
@maguffintop2596 3 ай бұрын
@@syberslade3878back when zombies were a thing and every actor tried acting like one.
@PosthumanHeresy
@PosthumanHeresy 2 ай бұрын
Yeah, that would have just been polishing a turd. Like shit, some of the best Classic Who episodes have a budget of whatever was left in the BBC couch cushions by Jimmy Savile's latest victims. The effects can be horrid and it doesn't matter if the plot is good.
@syberslade3878
@syberslade3878 2 ай бұрын
@@maguffintop2596 hahahah good one
@Alyssa-vd3sf
@Alyssa-vd3sf 4 ай бұрын
For everyone saying they've never seen/heard of this movie, just know: there is so much insane stuff going on that this video could easily be tripled in length. This doesn't even touch on Jupiter's father being killed by the KGB, the giant lizard men, Caine's 'blacking out and killing royals by instinct' backstory, the third space sibling, or all the weird Oedipus complex vibes from the siblings.
@cavegirl7157
@cavegirl7157 4 ай бұрын
I'd call it more than vibes, she's not technically his mother but he is still basically marrying his mother...and they're both fine with that...
@siddharthnath7917
@siddharthnath7917 4 ай бұрын
This can't seriously all be in 1 movie, can it?
@Alyssa-vd3sf
@Alyssa-vd3sf 4 ай бұрын
@@cavegirl7157 Fair point. And there's definitely at least an implication that it started back with the actual mother, at least in the case of Eddie Redmayne's character.
@lennierofthethirdfaneofchu7286
@lennierofthethirdfaneofchu7286 4 ай бұрын
@@siddharthnath7917 Yes, it is. Very fast paced bad movie.
@64324037
@64324037 4 ай бұрын
​@@siddharthnath7917 you must watch it lol
@christimorgret7818
@christimorgret7818 4 ай бұрын
:58 "I have no further questions about that" is the single best, most sanity-saving approach to this movie.
@planetslime
@planetslime 4 ай бұрын
I said I got it.
@TheValorism
@TheValorism 4 ай бұрын
My fave 'GEEZZZ...those are words!' 😆😆
@christimorgret7818
@christimorgret7818 4 ай бұрын
@TheValorism also an excellent option
@christimorgret7818
@christimorgret7818 4 ай бұрын
@@planetslime this works, too
@pbfoley
@pbfoley 4 ай бұрын
Ha! He cut 3 minutes from this video with that line alone
@beerosaurusrex
@beerosaurusrex 4 ай бұрын
The bee on the computer monitor in the background. Producer guy is royalty.
@taylorbrecht8049
@taylorbrecht8049 3 ай бұрын
Only something bee-rosaurusrex would notice
@Zso-VIII
@Zso-VIII 4 ай бұрын
"Oh cool, I never saw this movie so this Pitch Meeting will tell me what it was about" One minute in: "What the actual fuck"
@stevekirkpatrick1612
@stevekirkpatrick1612 4 ай бұрын
It sure is about words. And some other words.
@visebes9694
@visebes9694 4 ай бұрын
It's not even a bad movie, it's just not that memorable.
@monmothma3358
@monmothma3358 4 ай бұрын
​@@visebes9694I vividly remember Eddie Redmayne's scenes
@mrsplashman8308
@mrsplashman8308 4 ай бұрын
@@visebes9694no I thought it was absolutely terrible
@VladRadu-tq1pg
@VladRadu-tq1pg 4 ай бұрын
@@visebes9694 you re insane..it s absolute dumpsterfire
@f0rth3l0v30fchr15t
@f0rth3l0v30fchr15t 4 ай бұрын
"Teacher says every time a bell rings, a weird dog-man gets his wings back because he had them for unexplained reasons and lost them for other unexplained reasons"
@KhanGarth
@KhanGarth 4 ай бұрын
That's right, atta boy, weird dog guy who has wings for some strange reason!
@jeffheffner5653
@jeffheffner5653 4 ай бұрын
All dogs go to heaven. So.
@sabalghoo
@sabalghoo 4 ай бұрын
Wow wow wow...
@TheDuckofDoom.
@TheDuckofDoom. 4 ай бұрын
@@sabalghoo Bow wow wow...
@TickleMyResearch
@TickleMyResearch 4 ай бұрын
Heard this is ZuZu's voice lol
@happyslapsgiving5421
@happyslapsgiving5421 4 ай бұрын
"She barely looks interested" killed me! 🤣🤣🤣
@Jarakin
@Jarakin 4 ай бұрын
"Those are words" By far, the best and most coherent summary of this movie i have ever seen.
@MGmirkin
@MGmirkin 3 ай бұрын
...a lot of words!
@KirbyLinkACW
@KirbyLinkACW 4 ай бұрын
"So you have a movie for me?" "No, sir, I don't."
@carter_lovejoy
@carter_lovejoy 4 ай бұрын
“Amazi- wait, what?”
@Mister-Red
@Mister-Red 4 ай бұрын
​@@carter_lovejoythat's because I have a TV show for you!
@utube7930
@utube7930 4 ай бұрын
Barely interested
@kardnails8729
@kardnails8729 4 ай бұрын
Pretty sure there is a pitch meeting that starts like that, I think it was one of the anniversary ones.
@OratoryJamesIV
@OratoryJamesIV 4 ай бұрын
Well, in the case of Jupiter Ascending, that is accurate.
@SerbAtheist
@SerbAtheist 3 ай бұрын
I believe there is nothing more damning to be said about Jupiter Ascending than the fact that Honest Trailers simply narrated the entire plot of the movie and called it a day.
@pinky6758
@pinky6758 4 ай бұрын
You forgot the part how she is not actually the mother of these siblings but just so happens to have, by pure coincidence, the DNA of their mother. And the in-movie reasoning is that if you take just enough planets and wait for just enough aeons, eventually any possible DNA-code will show up multiple times. And whatever random person just so happens to have the correct DNA by virtue of pure chance, that person is legally the ruler of Earth.
@88Opportunist
@88Opportunist 4 ай бұрын
The movie is basically saying reincarnation is a thing. As in there are only so many DNA codes that eventually they start recycling.
@ASageCalledQ
@ASageCalledQ 4 ай бұрын
LOL
@burritodog3634
@burritodog3634 4 ай бұрын
i remember the dialogue where they explain they also have the ability to change genetics and create clones but they dont because its dangerous apparently
@cattraknoff
@cattraknoff 4 ай бұрын
If they were just looking for one gene, maybe. Or maybe like a few key ones. Maybe even a few dozen. Okay. But EVERY SINGLE GENE? The odds against that are beyond astronomical. Even with billions of people there still isn't a reasonable chance of it happening. There still is barely a snowball's chance in hell at best.
@moridin3336
@moridin3336 4 ай бұрын
ah yes, the 1000 monkeys w/ 1000 typewriters explanation, but w/ DNA.
@Elalmadebudin
@Elalmadebudin 4 ай бұрын
02:40 I love how you sync the quote with the dialogue of the actual scene to demostrates that you're not making it up despite how absurd it sounds.
@Shiestey
@Shiestey 4 ай бұрын
It was definitely meant to be one of those “so dumb it’s cute” quotes you see in a lot of romance movies, but just turned out to be dumb and desperate sounding lmao
@kevingray4980
@kevingray4980 3 ай бұрын
He was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders right before she died.”
@Sunless1337
@Sunless1337 4 ай бұрын
"hey shut up dad" Well, this explains why he never gets fired. xD
@carter_lovejoy
@carter_lovejoy 4 ай бұрын
I honestly thought that this movie already had a Pitch Meeting. Definitely one of the best comedies of the last decade!
@utube7930
@utube7930 4 ай бұрын
Hah hah! Laugh at the palpable incompetence of the mega rich! oh snap you paid to see it.
@attila0323
@attila0323 4 ай бұрын
Me too... I was like, isn't there already a PM? Is this a revisited one? No and no.
@carineherman4048
@carineherman4048 4 ай бұрын
There was a fantastic honest trailer about this movie
@VladRadu-tq1pg
@VladRadu-tq1pg 4 ай бұрын
@@utube7930 legit no one i know ever watched this trash nvm paying for it
@psonar
@psonar 4 ай бұрын
It has a hilarious Honest Trailer that you may be remembering... possibly my favorite! There's a lengthy plot summary where there's a warning at the bottom saying "Actual Plot of the Movie" or something which cracks me up because the plot is just so insane it makes fun of itself.
@BobbyJCFHvLichtenstein
@BobbyJCFHvLichtenstein 4 ай бұрын
When I watched this movie, I literally had no idea what was going on... the entire time. This pitch meeting exhibits the absurdity of this movie very well lol
@kopf-heldtotalneuro-logisc8479
@kopf-heldtotalneuro-logisc8479 4 ай бұрын
Accept same feelings here. lol And i am still lost. I just can´t get it - how this movie ever could come to life.
@primmoore6232
@primmoore6232 4 ай бұрын
Sneak over to *Honest Trailers'* take on this train wreck. He gave up reviewing it, and just told the whole plot. Brilliantly hilarious.
@Novastar.SaberCombat
@Novastar.SaberCombat 4 ай бұрын
Try some storytelling that actually DOES make sense. "Diamond Dragons". 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
@hazukichanx408
@hazukichanx408 4 ай бұрын
Hearing it described like this, I'm getting those familiar "This started as someone's fanfiction" vibes. Could be an original story, but that general level of narrative ability... where it's really just "This would be cool, so it happens. And that would be cool, so it happens too." Little trace of any kind of red thread or cause-and-effect chains precipitating events, so much as just... a bunch of random stuff all thrown at the viewer until, at some point, it ends. A child's story, of sorts. Not bad, necessarily, but... incongruous.
@-Gorby-
@-Gorby- 4 ай бұрын
I mean, the movie isn't really that hard to follow, it's just bizarre and silly.
@omgthisissoawesome
@omgthisissoawesome 4 ай бұрын
Ryan, you have no idea how long I have been waiting for you to make a pitch meeting about this. It's been years since I watched it but I still can't forget the scene where they use a sanitary pad to stop Channing Tatum from bleeding but use the sticky side of it instead of the absorbent side
@JacekPaszkoAMV
@JacekPaszkoAMV 4 ай бұрын
What the actual fuck
@mkultra2456
@mkultra2456 4 ай бұрын
@@JacekPaszkoAMV What part of "they use a sanitary pad to stop Channing Tatum from bleeding but use the sticky side of it instead of the absorbent side" don't you understand?
@brentgilliam1209
@brentgilliam1209 4 ай бұрын
Yes... just yes to this entire comment string.
@arvinroidoatienza7082
@arvinroidoatienza7082 4 ай бұрын
​​@@mkultra2456were not women duh. We men don't know how pads work
@donperegrine922
@donperegrine922 4 ай бұрын
​@@arvinroidoatienza7082 You GOTTA get the string way up inside!
@caesar7734
@caesar7734 4 ай бұрын
“Kane got his wings back” “But I thought he was part dog” “Yep, and now he’s got his wings back”
@spritemon98
@spritemon98 4 ай бұрын
Brought to you by redbull
@LuisSierra42
@LuisSierra42 4 ай бұрын
He forgot his meds
@Novastar.SaberCombat
@Novastar.SaberCombat 4 ай бұрын
Getting your wings back whilst trimming your beard of bees after cleaning toilets for no reason is... ... flight!
@hazukichanx408
@hazukichanx408 4 ай бұрын
Every time a lame abrahamicist loses their crappy denial of critical thinking, an angel falls, and a doggo gets its wings.
@jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
@jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii 4 ай бұрын
He’s from Pegasus.
@Chris_Hood
@Chris_Hood 4 ай бұрын
"Okay, *this is gonna be a weird one.* " Ohhhhhh, you have no idea
@ianitor
@ianitor 4 ай бұрын
Take all the weirdness you can imagine and multiply it by itself.
@daryltester1710
@daryltester1710 3 ай бұрын
Bee squared?
@ianitor
@ianitor 3 ай бұрын
@@daryltester1710 beads?
@TheCapnMorgan
@TheCapnMorgan 4 ай бұрын
“The queen has a beard of bees” idk why I found that line utterly hilarious
@brucebaker810
@brucebaker810 3 ай бұрын
Perhaps because 1) Queen Elizabeth was of the "female" human phenotype. Beards are typically s characteristic of the male human phenotype. And jumbling up phenotypes is TIGHT. And funny. 2) Queen Elizabeth is dead. So a beard of bees--rather than, say, globs of maggots consuming the decaying flesh of the former Sovereign of 12 countries--is an amusing twist.
@korimiller379
@korimiller379 4 ай бұрын
"So you have a movie for me?" "No I have a series of mostly unrelated plot points that might work in sequence..." "Good enough!"
@XENOS_Indie_Game_Dev
@XENOS_Indie_Game_Dev 4 ай бұрын
sounds written by AI
@impeeratorii
@impeeratorii 4 ай бұрын
My favorite fan theory is that this was planned as a triolgy, each part focussing on one sibling, but the studio said "No way, were shelling out that much money, make it one movie first and we weill see..." It explains all the loos threads and repititions.
@dsbmitchell
@dsbmitchell 4 ай бұрын
@@impeeratoriiWow, that helps to make so much more sense
@jamessmells123
@jamessmells123 4 ай бұрын
I couldn’t believe this movie WASN’T trying to cram the first three books of an eight part series into one film. Was baffled to find out it was original
@bmanmcfly
@bmanmcfly 4 ай бұрын
IKR, it was a movie with so much potential...
@Templar462
@Templar462 4 ай бұрын
@@bmanmcfly was it? because this honestly sounds like a bender gone horribly wrong, on a work-night, when your script is due the next morning.
@scifiwriter98
@scifiwriter98 4 ай бұрын
The Wachowskis always swing for the fences and sometimes succeed. Not this time.
@G360LIVE
@G360LIVE 4 ай бұрын
@@Templar462 The story idea has potential. The script needed a Page 1 rewrite though.
@bmanmcfly
@bmanmcfly 4 ай бұрын
@@Templar462 Consider the overall story; a "normal" person in modern day discovers that humanity is really just a small cog in a galaxy (or greater) spanning empire that is using those lives as a commodity for the rulers own benefit, and this normal person happens to hold a status that can overturn that circumstance to save humanity as a whole.... IMO, that's a great premise for a movie or a series of books. I know I've read worse ones. In terms of the execution, when I first watched the movies I chose to ignore those details, but the critique is pretty damn close to spot on. If things had been fleshed out; film 1 the girl finds out about the galactic empire and that she holds a special rank in that empire that she was not aware. Film 2; after discovering the size and scope of the empire, the protagonist tries to stake her claim over the planet she wants to save, but has to deal with the "royal" feud in order to maintain that claim, beating the 2 of 3 weakest siblings. Film 3; Starts with battling the final sibling, then the protagonist gathers forces in order to relinquish the "empires" control over the planet or to destabilize that empire in such a way that it cannot present a threat to the earth for the foreseeable future. Yes, it would hit the brakes on most of the action, but there are many books where the anticipation of the conflict takes up more space than the actual conflicts.
@chiarardn2401
@chiarardn2401 4 ай бұрын
I can't believe you did a pitch meeting for Jupiter Ascending and didn't even mention the sanitary pad scene! LOL!
@VinceroAlpha
@VinceroAlpha 3 ай бұрын
Yeah, after watching this and not the movie at all, I’m glad he left that scene out.🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢
@TheAeris07
@TheAeris07 3 ай бұрын
Do I even want to know?
@BlinkingEldrichRoses
@BlinkingEldrichRoses 4 ай бұрын
"You off your meds again?" Killed me
@TheNinthGeneration1
@TheNinthGeneration1 4 ай бұрын
“Hey shut up dad!”
@leebarbs7176
@leebarbs7176 4 ай бұрын
That & "THOSE ARE MORE WORDS!"
@waywardmind
@waywardmind 4 ай бұрын
"shuddup dad"
@utube7930
@utube7930 4 ай бұрын
One time I was off my meds and it killed me too
@positivelynegative9149
@positivelynegative9149 4 ай бұрын
Oh no! Did it kill you because you're off your meds? 😲
@CommentaryCommenter
@CommentaryCommenter 4 ай бұрын
Watching a Pitch Meeting for a movie you’ve never heard of is TIGHT!!!
@ninjalectualx
@ninjalectualx 4 ай бұрын
Repeating the same joke on every video is not tight. It's loose
@Mister-Red
@Mister-Red 4 ай бұрын
​@@ninjalectualxohh loose things are TIGHT!
@thegreatandterrible4508
@thegreatandterrible4508 4 ай бұрын
You have been blessed.
@Kratoctavi0
@Kratoctavi0 4 ай бұрын
​@@ninjalectualx Yucking someone's yum is not tight
@carter_lovejoy
@carter_lovejoy 4 ай бұрын
I highly recommend watching this with some friends and drinks!
@markmatson
@markmatson 4 ай бұрын
My daughter spent much of her early childhood writing a movie script involving evil bears and fairies and vampires and stuff. (A "trailer" is at my home page.) Imagine if she somehow later became a famous writer/director with enough power she could dust off that script she finished before she turned 10 and have a studio dump 100 million dollars into it. That's basically Jupiter Ascending for the Wachowski siblings.
@NJGuy1973
@NJGuy1973 3 ай бұрын
When is your daughter going to start a YT channel?
@caarthikraj8184
@caarthikraj8184 4 ай бұрын
This is my new favorite pitch meeting by far, the "this is gonna be a weird one" and "are you off your meds again?" were so perfect
@customerguy8581
@customerguy8581 4 ай бұрын
Yeah, this was crazy funny. Also the Queen's beard made of bees. I got more laughs out loud out of this one than any other one, and I've seen most of the pitch meetings
@customerguy8581
@customerguy8581 4 ай бұрын
oh and also Jupiter Jones is a freak killed me
@jimbomacjimbo95
@jimbomacjimbo95 4 ай бұрын
"Hey shaddup dad, so..."
@TotoLakay
@TotoLakay 4 ай бұрын
"Those are WORDS!" That straight up killed me.😂😂😂
@maboyles90
@maboyles90 4 ай бұрын
That may be my new favorite joke! I'm going to try to find a way to use that in real life.
@guyfurman2463
@guyfurman2463 4 ай бұрын
New Canon. The guy playing the producer gets better every time.
@frauleinhohenzollern
@frauleinhohenzollern Ай бұрын
"Straight up killed me" .... Those are words.
@jonathandixon7760
@jonathandixon7760 4 ай бұрын
I always thought the “I love dogs” line looked like they were reading it for the first time off a prompt. She says it with just a little question in her voice. He just gives up, ends the scene and walks off. She follows to say WTF. He turns back and they just stare at each other like they just fully realized what this movie is.
@user-aRb00d3r
@user-aRb00d3r 3 ай бұрын
😂😂😂 seems true
@BatmanFan76
@BatmanFan76 4 ай бұрын
“Making an original movie with the directors of The Matrix is tight!” “No it’s not.” “Yeah, you’re right.”
@carter_lovejoy
@carter_lovejoy 4 ай бұрын
It sucks that the Wachowskis haven’t done anything that lives up to the original Matrix in terms of how grounded, spectacular and revolutionary it was. I guess the best thing they’ve done since the original Matrix was producing and writing the screenplay for V for Vendetta and I’ve heard that Sense8, the show they made on Netflix, is also good. But their track record overall has been very polarizing.
@alm2187
@alm2187 4 ай бұрын
Seems like the potential was there. Maybe they should have stopped going with experimental stuff and focused on what worked in Bound and The Matrix (though perhaps not in the same movie).
@hartthorn
@hartthorn 4 ай бұрын
@@carter_lovejoy Ehhh, it's less polarizing and more "those ladies are freaky, and do cool, weird shit." Not a huge fan of how the Matrix trilogy ended, but it was never BAD. Sense8 is weird but an emotional firehose. Even Speed Racer has been getting a larger critical re-evaluation for doing stuff that is honestly amazing if you just stop EXPECTING it to be a different kind of movie. And I'll defend Matrix Resurrections til the day I die. Cloud Atlas is supposed to even be pretty solid if you can get passed the, ya know... weird race make up stuff.
@pacmonster066
@pacmonster066 4 ай бұрын
​@@carter_lovejoyThe problem with the Wachowskis is they're more interested in subversion of cinema tropes then logically consistent story structure. All of their projects suffer from this problem with their "better" stories mostly grabbing the story structure from other sources. The first Matrix is fundamentally Alice in Wonderland (which the Wachowskis make obvious via the Alice in Wonderland references in the movie). The further they went away from an existing story structure in their projects the worse they got.
@Grasslander
@Grasslander 4 ай бұрын
@@hartthorn "Ladies"? LOL Oh yeah, I forgot. U.S. leftists know they must pretend to believe whatever the clique of media owners shove down their throat. Otherwise you are targeted at work. I guess the cowardice carries over to the internet too. Carry on.
@joshmckinlay587
@joshmckinlay587 4 ай бұрын
"Those are more words!" LMFAO
@harrymills2770
@harrymills2770 4 ай бұрын
Heh. That was my favorite bit.
@davidwright4201
@davidwright4201 4 ай бұрын
Probably no one else is old enough to remember this on here, but Jupiter Jones is also the name of one of the Three investigators from Alfred Hitchcock's book series, I read all of them until my friend told me about The Hardy boys and Nancy Drew books, then I read every single book they had, it's been almost 20 years since I've even read The Hardy boys or Nancy Drew.
@alm2187
@alm2187 4 ай бұрын
3:34 "I CREATE LIFE...!" (switches from emotive shouting to emotive devoicing) "... And I destroy it."
@something1600
@something1600 4 ай бұрын
He's just a massive melodramatic dork.
@ultimateowlie2283
@ultimateowlie2283 4 ай бұрын
By an Academy Award nominee 😆
4 ай бұрын
👏
@primmoore6232
@primmoore6232 4 ай бұрын
@@ultimateowlie2283 ... who didn't put any effort into his part, knowing it was what Jupiter was scrubbing out of those toilets. Nearly killed Eddie's career.
@KingRorix
@KingRorix 4 ай бұрын
​@@ultimateowlie2283*winner
@armelior4610
@armelior4610 4 ай бұрын
Ah yes, the Wachowskis' Rebel Moon. But it's way more fun in a "so bad it's good" way. The line about the bees recognizing all royalty is still one of the most funny unintentional humor I've heard on screen
@thegodofalldragons
@thegodofalldragons 4 ай бұрын
Rebel Moon except made by people with talent.
@AchedSphinx
@AchedSphinx 4 ай бұрын
rebel moon without the wheat.
@easolinas1233
@easolinas1233 4 ай бұрын
Especially since it has absolutely nothing to do with anything. It's just a weird idea the Wachowskis came up with, and for some reason they were allowed to put it in their movie.
@hebat45
@hebat45 4 ай бұрын
Rebel moon without the slow mo, wheat and much better visuals
@mkultra2456
@mkultra2456 4 ай бұрын
@@AchedSphinx Actually they had the wheat in one scene. Or might have been corn. There was a big field of produce that's for sure.
@iamgregory1299
@iamgregory1299 4 ай бұрын
I need to see a pitch meeting done on Van Helsing (2004). I like the movie, but I also can see potential for a funny pitch meeting in it.
@Sir.Redacted
@Sir.Redacted 4 ай бұрын
"Feeding off the life essence of humans is tight!" Is absolutely something a big studio executive would say.
@Celinra
@Celinra 4 ай бұрын
With a dog-man in there, I feel like there was a missed opportunity for a "bow-wow-wow-wow... wow" joke. (Seriously though, great job as always!)
@SageWon-1aussie
@SageWon-1aussie 4 ай бұрын
That would be a truly awesome joke. 👍😎
@gnocchidokey
@gnocchidokey 4 ай бұрын
He's gonna be pissed he didn't do this.
@katherineb5872
@katherineb5872 4 ай бұрын
Omg that would have been such a cute joke!!
@pauladame6310
@pauladame6310 4 ай бұрын
​@@gnocchidokey More than just an inconvenience feeling for him for sure
@AudioPerplex
@AudioPerplex 4 ай бұрын
hahaha, good point.
@leelee1286
@leelee1286 3 ай бұрын
“I said I have no further questions!” 😂🤣😂
@ToyKeeper
@ToyKeeper 4 ай бұрын
Jupiter Ascending was the best, longest, and only commercial I've ever seen for air skates.
@cleopanda4906
@cleopanda4906 4 ай бұрын
I can't believe this isn't a revisited but a new video
@monmothma3358
@monmothma3358 4 ай бұрын
Yeah, especially since he's talking about the Queen of England
@vanderful2397
@vanderful2397 4 ай бұрын
@@monmothma3358 When the movie was pitched she was still alive
@kityhawk2000
@kityhawk2000 4 ай бұрын
​@vanderful2397 being still alive is tight especially if you're singing the song from Portal
@SageWon-1aussie
@SageWon-1aussie 4 ай бұрын
Took a while to figure out how this might have been pitched. Successfully, I mean.
@monmothma3358
@monmothma3358 4 ай бұрын
@@vanderful2397 True 😄
@paradoxlaboratories8005
@paradoxlaboratories8005 4 ай бұрын
1:24 “So then they go see this guy, Stinger, and he’s half bee.” 🤣 What the hell is this??? I’m guessing he likes jazz.
@MGmirkin
@MGmirkin 3 ай бұрын
Nah, he just goes to the jazz lounge to get buzzed...
@pbj1984
@pbj1984 3 ай бұрын
I see what you did there
@Sat0rr0taS
@Sat0rr0taS 4 ай бұрын
The new Pitch every week is 100% the best part of KZbin.
@WuSezer
@WuSezer 4 ай бұрын
It's every two weeks though.
@thatsgib6015
@thatsgib6015 4 ай бұрын
"Those sure are some words!" Never before have I found a way to perfectly explain how I feel whenever I hear a character drop fictional lore
@ShantanuTiwari-rx3ti
@ShantanuTiwari-rx3ti 3 ай бұрын
Nowadays I randomly get urge to watch pitch meeting, I come here to watch them and everytime wish to god to bless this channel.
@dcmbassi
@dcmbassi 4 ай бұрын
Oh my goodness, I forgot about this one. I remember wondering how a life of cleaning toilets prepares you for parkour on a crumbling space station.
@stevekirkpatrick1612
@stevekirkpatrick1612 4 ай бұрын
That's what you get for never cleaning your toilet.
@dcmbassi
@dcmbassi 4 ай бұрын
@@stevekirkpatrick1612 🤣🤣🤣
@my0p1n10nst1nks
@my0p1n10nst1nks 4 ай бұрын
Hey, shut up lol😊
@Novastar.SaberCombat
@Novastar.SaberCombat 4 ай бұрын
"Becuzz!"
@derpmang5539
@derpmang5539 4 ай бұрын
Because, as any toilet cleaner will tell you, you are gonna go through a lot of shit!
@michaelanderson6394
@michaelanderson6394 4 ай бұрын
I honestly feel like you could answer a good chunk of the questions that Producer Guy might have just by having Screenwriter Guy say, “I’m here on behalf of the Wachowskis.” I feel like that would clear most things up about how… out there this movie is.
@tehweh8202
@tehweh8202 4 ай бұрын
Ah... was the movie "directed" by them?
@rawdog1999
@rawdog1999 4 ай бұрын
It was written as a trilogy by the Wachowski siblings. The studio made them compress it down into 1 movie. That 1 movie was like 2 hours and 40 minutes long, and the studio then made them cut 40 minutes. It could never succeed under those conditions.
@EGreeneConversations
@EGreeneConversations 3 ай бұрын
it was also a very weird bad plot. even from what they showed us.
@criley7755
@criley7755 Ай бұрын
Yes. What Jupiter Ascending really needed to suceed was more Jupiter Ascending...
@Dadbot
@Dadbot 4 ай бұрын
New pitch meetings for old movies are tight
@raiseer
@raiseer 4 ай бұрын
Yes. I'm still waiting for "In the name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale".
@BobbyJCFHvLichtenstein
@BobbyJCFHvLichtenstein 4 ай бұрын
My favorite part was "Are you off your meds again?" "Hey shut up dad!"
@RetroBlockade
@RetroBlockade 4 ай бұрын
New pitch meeting lore dropped
@rcschmidt668
@rcschmidt668 4 ай бұрын
An instant classic!
@reezlaw
@reezlaw 4 ай бұрын
I hadn't even noticed "dad" hahaha
@alexoblivion9295
@alexoblivion9295 3 ай бұрын
I was really drunk both times that I watched this, and the way I remembered it was, Mila Kunis and a Robot wait in line at the DMV for the entire movie, getting transferred to a different desk every time they get to the counter, for 3 hours. That was the way I remembered it, so I never tried to watch it again, and for years I've just been telling people it was called 'Rings Around Uranus starring Mila Kunis'
@vivamortua
@vivamortua 4 ай бұрын
Great pitch meeting! Another corollary issue with the ending is that, in addition to other planets still being harvested, when Jupiter eventually dies (from old age or otherwise) ownership of Earth will transfer to someone else who might then harvest everyone. Perhaps she could write some kind of space will of her own to leave the planet to another Earthling, but there is no indication that she has done so or even intends to
@easolinas1233
@easolinas1233 4 ай бұрын
Well, she's not very bright. I mean, at the end of the movie she's queen of the whole planet and happily cleaning toilets. She really doesn't have good decision-making skills.
@xxTheMajorxx
@xxTheMajorxx 4 ай бұрын
When this thumbnail popped up, I left a meeting early just so I could watch this to get some confirmation that this movie was absolutely insane.
@rumo510
@rumo510 4 ай бұрын
I had purged this movie from my memory. When I saw the thumbnail I said "ohh shiiiiit" and I flashed back to cringing in agony for an hour and a half when I had watched it
@tarron3237
@tarron3237 4 ай бұрын
You mean insanely bad, right?
@EntropyKC
@EntropyKC 4 ай бұрын
This is without question the most perplexed I have been after a pitch meeting. Even Moonfall was less stupid by the looks of things. Interesting that films named after celestial bodies either falling or rising are completely mad.
@emorsi
@emorsi 4 ай бұрын
And I remember the trailer being somehow exiting so I really looked forward to it. And then the movie reviews were so bad, so overwhelming bad, that I decided not to watch it. I think this was the right decision.
@DocTheHawk
@DocTheHawk 4 ай бұрын
​@EntropyKC it's actually a good movie. Written by and directed by the same people as the Matrix.
@Pyromaniac77777
@Pyromaniac77777 3 ай бұрын
“Didn’t you say he was part dog?” “Yep! And now he’s got his wings back” Amazing how I’ve watched hundreds of these and you’ve still got it, whatever it is
@johndelacruz5025
@johndelacruz5025 4 ай бұрын
I love it when you guys just make pitch meetings about movies made years ago.
@F-sj7cu
@F-sj7cu 4 ай бұрын
He just had a kid and is using banked Pitch Meetings. Give him a break.
@10base-teaparty97
@10base-teaparty97 4 ай бұрын
@@F-sj7cu I don't think they meant it sarcastically. A lot of fans really like it when some random unexpected movie pops up.
@wilcee238
@wilcee238 4 ай бұрын
Producer Guy’s face at 1:46 when he said “You off your meds again?” had me rolling.
@osheridan
@osheridan Ай бұрын
"Hey, shut up Dad"
@MasseyKY
@MasseyKY 4 ай бұрын
"You off your meds again?" "Hey shut up Dad" 😂😂
@Coffeepotion
@Coffeepotion 4 ай бұрын
This entire movie sounds like a fever dream
@ianitor
@ianitor 4 ай бұрын
It’s worse And better 😅
@CorePathway
@CorePathway 4 ай бұрын
Ayahuasca
@dawnfire82
@dawnfire82 4 ай бұрын
Well, the writers are literally insane, so...
@skylarmccune9242
@skylarmccune9242 4 ай бұрын
…or an acid trip 😳
@naamadossantossilva4736
@naamadossantossilva4736 4 ай бұрын
That is what happens when you inject hormones your body isn't ready for.
@Thekingofsandwiches
@Thekingofsandwiches 4 ай бұрын
This is the first time I could see Producer Guy at the end just saying “No. No, we’re not doing this one. “
@Novastar.SaberCombat
@Novastar.SaberCombat 4 ай бұрын
You're giving PG waaayyy too much credit. Errr, I mean Producer DAD. 😂
@MGmirkin
@MGmirkin 3 ай бұрын
And then, "...Aww, c'mon dad!? Even if I get the Wachowski Brothers??" "Okay, but only if you get the Wachowski Brothers..." **12 months later** "I got the Wachowski Sisters!" **Producer Guy stares...** **Pitch Guy stares...** **Producer Guy stares...** **Pitch Guy stares...** "...ohh, okay. FINE!!"
@dendroxden440
@dendroxden440 22 күн бұрын
I remember loving it when I saw it in theatres, but don't remember anything that happened in it apart from the whole harvesting humans for eternal youth thing. Watching this pitch meeting makes me wonder why tf I loved it 😂
@Lukeharperdeadlmao
@Lukeharperdeadlmao 4 ай бұрын
Pitch meeting is the best channel ever
@MGmirkin
@MGmirkin 3 ай бұрын
Honest Trailers is right up there...
@smorris12
@smorris12 4 ай бұрын
Naming your lead character after one of Alfred Hitchcock's Three Investigators is tight.
@seeschwalbe
@seeschwalbe 4 ай бұрын
The movie would have been ten times better with the original Jupiter Jones as the lead tbh. Wouldn't even have hurt the plot, as there is no plot.
@PhilBagels
@PhilBagels 4 ай бұрын
YES! I was wondering if anyone besides me recognized the name Jupiter Jones! Also, it should be noted that Jupiter has been an exclusively male name for at least a few thousand years. The "-piter" part of the name literally means "father".
@realbeefcastle
@realbeefcastle 4 ай бұрын
They should’ve named her Bob Andrews or Pete Crenshaw. Missed opportunity.
@andrerosaesilva
@andrerosaesilva 3 ай бұрын
YES!!! YES!!!! YES!!!!! A THOUSAND TIMES YES!!!! After years begging for this pitch meeting, it finally happened!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH
@quokka_11
@quokka_11 4 ай бұрын
1:05 "I said I got it." You do, sir. You do indeed got it.
@kmjober
@kmjober 4 ай бұрын
I have seen this movie and could not have told you any of the plot, other than i remember space was involved. This pitch meeting, besides being very funny, is a much better use of your time than trying to watch the original.
@nagolbackwards1335
@nagolbackwards1335 4 ай бұрын
I genuinely thought this movie was a dream I had until I saw that Ryan had made a pitch meeting of it
@MFLeon27
@MFLeon27 4 ай бұрын
'Well he got his wings back' 'I thought he was part dog' 'Jup, and now he got his wings back'
@tatsuuuuuu
@tatsuuuuuu 4 ай бұрын
"I thought he was part dog?!?" "YEP and now he's got his *wings* back!" God! when you put it like that xD I love this movie but yeah it was freaking goofy.
@Burevix
@Burevix 4 ай бұрын
Part bird dog.
@RelativelyBest
@RelativelyBest Күн бұрын
Man, this movie. I really wanted it to be good because our current popculture could really use some new material, but it was just all over the place. It really didn't seem like they knew what kind of story they wanted to tell.
@josiah3820
@josiah3820 4 ай бұрын
0:06 "no it's not." 😂
@theMLBfan
@theMLBfan 4 ай бұрын
"those are more words!". Gotta love the enthusiasm.😂
@FathersUnited-fu
@FathersUnited-fu 4 ай бұрын
"Heyshudupdad" is wild. I'd never😂
@pg2826
@pg2826 4 ай бұрын
My favorite part of the movie was actually Jupiter Descending. The visual of when they first enter Jupiter's atmosphere was pretty amazing for its time. Also her wedding dress was beautiful.
@mkultra2456
@mkultra2456 4 ай бұрын
Yeah say what you will, those space effects were good. The base in the hole on Jupiter was TIGHT TIGHT TIGHT!
@notme222
@notme222 4 ай бұрын
This movie makes me really appreciate that Iron Man never really "skated" around on the jets.
@CaptHayfever
@CaptHayfever 4 ай бұрын
On the other hand, Shadow the Hedgehog.
@wilcee238
@wilcee238 4 ай бұрын
He did a little in the first movie.
@gregelsnic2545
@gregelsnic2545 4 ай бұрын
Thank goodness they didn't include the skates from the older Iron Man comics.
@973daydreamer
@973daydreamer 4 ай бұрын
This has made my week. I have wanted to see a pitch meeting for this for years. Thank you ❤
@JoshWilliams123
@JoshWilliams123 4 ай бұрын
"...and this one can't control the volume of his voice." LOL. It was a mixture of puberty and gasping for air.
@Bingo_the_Pug
@Bingo_the_Pug 4 ай бұрын
Ironically if this was an anime from the 90’s then it would be fucking awesome
@Unseen4ce
@Unseen4ce 3 ай бұрын
This was one of the funniest pitch meetings in awhile.
@leonardbanda7416
@leonardbanda7416 4 ай бұрын
“You off your meds again?” 😭🤣🤣
@johnvladman9425
@johnvladman9425 4 ай бұрын
FINALLY! I have been waiting for this for YEARS!
@IndigenouslyRez-xs9bg
@IndigenouslyRez-xs9bg 3 ай бұрын
"Feeding off the human essence of life is tight!" A conversation most ain't ready for.
@MaesterMike
@MaesterMike 4 ай бұрын
Yes! I always wanted this movie to be pitched, and you haven't let me down!
@k.chriscaldwell4141
@k.chriscaldwell4141 4 ай бұрын
_”Those are words?!”_ 🤣
@LordSmyrnian
@LordSmyrnian 2 ай бұрын
It's nice that, when I'm interested in knowing what a movie is about but cant stand the thought of watching it, Ryan George saves the day 🤣
@giramon17
@giramon17 4 ай бұрын
I remember seeing the trailer for this movie and getting so hyped up that I convinced 2 of my friends to go and watch it...the only time I had literally fallen asleep in the cinema.
@kopf-heldtotalneuro-logisc8479
@kopf-heldtotalneuro-logisc8479 4 ай бұрын
You can be lucky if you still can call them your friends after this move. lol
@giramon17
@giramon17 4 ай бұрын
@@kopf-heldtotalneuro-logisc8479 no problem, we just watched Monkey Man together, so we like shitty movies. I just didn't expect Jupiter ascending to be so boring.
@Codiferrous
@Codiferrous 4 ай бұрын
“….You off your meds again?” “HEYSHUTUPDAD”
@Aphova
@Aphova 4 ай бұрын
The worse the movie the better the Pitch Meeting. This one is perfection 👌
@EricTheKartoonKing
@EricTheKartoonKing 4 ай бұрын
I literally saw this fing movie in the theatre, and it still feels like a fever dream. But I distinctly remember getting to the moment with the bees, listening in disbelief as Sean Bean said bees recognize royalty, and getting up to walk out. I only stayed cuz the friends I was with asked me to 😆
@LordAnublz
@LordAnublz 4 ай бұрын
Up to this day i think she owes the world a sex tape to make up for this movie! :D
@apaloosa01
@apaloosa01 4 ай бұрын
But does Sean Bean die in the end ? (Haven't watched the movie...)
@Al3xtheMeh
@Al3xtheMeh 4 ай бұрын
1:46 Good job Ryan, you managed to make me snort water up my nose from laughter. Haven't done that in a long time.
@HouseOfTheHybrid
@HouseOfTheHybrid 26 күн бұрын
The visuals in this movie was stunning though
@catmanduu66
@catmanduu66 4 ай бұрын
I happened to have just watched this movie again because someone was talking about how nuts it was. It is insane.
@sarahd.5244
@sarahd.5244 4 ай бұрын
This movie is a golden glittering gift. It's incredible. It's wild. It's everything I wanted as a 13 year old girl in a movie. I would rather something try for an extreme, fun, over the top adventure than another bland remake.
@____uncompetative
@____uncompetative 4 ай бұрын
Good for you.
@bartharris
@bartharris 4 ай бұрын
You’re god damn right. I felt the same as a 37 year old man. Such good, bonkers fun!
@nicoleackerman205
@nicoleackerman205 4 ай бұрын
At least it is original or possibly based off a book but original to the screen
@mariselafischer2903
@mariselafischer2903 3 ай бұрын
Yea I liked it too. And some of the scenes where its like,"that couldn't happen, that's too crazy" ... we're actually a social commentary on the fact that people have no clue what's going on.
@specific_pseudonym
@specific_pseudonym 3 ай бұрын
I'm glad this got summarized for me so that I didn't have to try watching the movie again. I have yet to make it more than a halfway through even after 5 or so attempts.
@conwarlock3537
@conwarlock3537 4 ай бұрын
The wings on the part-dog dude actually make sense because dogs are part angel.
@monmothma3358
@monmothma3358 4 ай бұрын
I might actually believe that. Dogs are kinda angelic. Channing Tatum on the other hand...
@MarvNARK
@MarvNARK 4 ай бұрын
Is more ​@@monmothma3358
@pvshka
@pvshka 4 ай бұрын
I mean, dog spelled backwards IS god, so...
@Semystic
@Semystic 4 ай бұрын
........ I'll allow it
@LamanKnight
@LamanKnight 4 ай бұрын
Aww. That's the sweetest thing I've read in this whole comment section. (They're good dogs, Brent.)
@edwarddejong8025
@edwarddejong8025 4 ай бұрын
The scene with a window looing at jupiter is super beautiful. I would pay to have that slow movie of Jupiter running in a picture frame. Incredible amount of money was spent on this film.
@notme222
@notme222 17 күн бұрын
Imagine if *The Rise of Skywalker* was the only Star Wars movie ever made. That's *Jupiter Ascending* .
@HailHydra1001
@HailHydra1001 4 ай бұрын
A pitch meeting for Across The Spiderverse would be Tight!
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