Keywords for Each Of The Enneagram "Sexual" Subtypes

[@stephanieromeocoaching]

You re such a great teacher. You crack me up. Thanks Tom

[@twlahue]

Wow, thanks!

[@katemcnulty7924]

This was awesome..so funny and so true! Thank you for your ministry to us! So helpful!

[@twlahue]

I’m glad you enjoyed it! Your support means a lot to me, and I’m thrilled that you found it helpful!

[@EmTreasure88]

To add onto the sexual 5: they're really good at not taking a clear initiative. There is many testings to see if someone is that ideal partner. I have done this many times by having "squishes" (platonic crushes). There may be curiosity and attraction there, but like i need to know the person very well before i would even consider dating. So sx 5s can have a demiromantic vibe to them.

[@winniolanimus138]

As an SP4 who dftly also relates to the SX4 to a degree, I´d very much say, we are ALL crazy, and to a degree in a good way even, but also these "types" arent there for us to be like "Huh, to each their own, I guess", bcs each type -even if the fear of a specific type is rooted in early childhood memories and somewhat rigid for us as people - embodies a lesson and a challenge that we can grow from.

[@twlahue]

Crazy? I prefer to call it "uniquely adventurous"! We're all just colorful characters in this wild story called life, and it's the quirks that keep things interesting!

[@winniolanimus138]

@@twlahue Fair point and a solid answer from a solid seven xD Much love and respect for your work

[@dennisjonker4804]

That drawbridge part was gold! 😁

[@twlahue]

Glad you liked it!

[@JFrombaugh]

Hi, it's Joseph. I'm a SP/SX 4w5 who actually had many coaching sessions with your daughter Kaylee back when she used to do that from 2020-2023. She was very adamant that I was Sexual-repressed based on her impressions of me & how I didn't fit the Sexual 4 stereotypes, but all along I KNEW that if I was actually understanding Sexual correctly, then there was basically zero chance I was SX-last. I fit Beatrice Chestnut's/Uranio Paes' descriptions of Social-repressed entirely. I've always been very much in tune with what "turns me on" energetically & chasing after that "special someone/something" without caring what other people think, prone to losing myself in my passions, and can sometimes be clueless about what other people want from me or what is appropriate in a mixed social situation. And whenever I've tried to explain how I experience Sexual, with all its good & bad, to people I know who actually ARE SX-last (like my Mom), they've just looked at me like I was from Saturn & had 15 heads. I can't help but wonder if Kaylee would've felt differently had she actually spent time around me, observed me in public, etc. as opposed to just formally talking with me over Zoom...

[@twlahue]

Interesting, that makes sense.

[@atypicalgeek88]

Am I right in thinking that even if we aren't dominant in a subtype, when we get in the preferred situation of the subtype (an organization/large group, a one-on-one or romantic relationship), we'll act out of the subtype (if we're letting our personality drive the bus?)? Ex: a self-pres dominant 9 would still tend toward fusion with a partner?

[@twlahue]

I think we are dominant in one subtype and this might change throughout our life. But usually we can see some of each in our life. Usually there is one we know that we are not.

[@atypicalgeek88]

@@twlahue thanks!

[@adaccardo7702]

What is the recommended enneagram test? Is it on your website?

[@twlahue]

I don't have a test on my website: but here you go: Here’s a list of websites that offer free Enneagram tests: Truity - truity.com Offers a free Enneagram test with an option to purchase a more detailed report. Eclectic Energies - eclecticenergies.com Provides two free Enneagram tests: one with instinctual variants and one without. Your Enneagram Coach - yourenneagramcoach.com Free, basic Enneagram test designed to help people understand their type from a Christian perspective. 9 Types - 9types.com Offers a simple, free Enneagram test to help you find your type. Personality Path - personalitypath.com A quick, free Enneagram test with basic results. Crystal Knows - crystalknows.com Free Enneagram test that also integrates with other personality models. EnneaApp - enneaapp.com Offers a free Enneagram test through their mobile app, which provides type insights. Explore Your Type - exploreyourtype.com A free test available online through the Typology Institute. True Self Institute - trueself.io Offers a free test with an option for paid in-depth results. These free tests can give you a good introduction to discovering your Enneagram type, though paid options often provide deeper insights.

[@adaccardo7702]

@@twlahue Thank you 🙏🏼💫🙏🏼

[@moveordievision]

how to tell apart a 5w6 social 5 and a sexual 1 and pls give me the details ... tnx

[@atypicalgeek88]

Try relistening to those sections in the videos or downloading the notes from the store page on Tom's website?

[@Bunchofheadaches]

I'm a sx/so 7, never thought I would got called out like that lol I'm a very curious person i do admit. People really fascinates me though. I mean, human mind in general is very interesting. I have DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) and different identities are also resonate with different type somehow. (Like how I'm a 7w6 but the other host is 2w1 and another one is 5w6) It led me to want to learn and explore more about the human nature on how complex we can be and why each of us are so different, even within ourselves! (Hence the DID) We as a system kind of interested in learning about ourselves via various medium in general, to understand why we are the way we are and what we can do to better ourselves in all aspects I guess. And of course that led me to started doing some research about the Enneagram and MBTI system myself. (Each of us have our own experience with them, due to umm seperate memory lol) Your videos helped me see things more clearer on many aspects. I appreciate your insight, thank you. 😊

[@jasmindelarenta2083]

I’m a social 3 woman but i’m very competitive on sexual attractiviness. Is because i’m 3 so/sx?

[@charlesstokes1967]

Thank you

[@twlahue]

You're welcome

[@eroslevihector542]

Am I still a 8w7 sexual if I let go of my need for control? And don’t really feel the need to force others to do or share anything they don’t want to? I used to be just like this but now I let go and am comfortable with the fact that if they need help they’ll come to me.

[@moneymanagement24]

Hi Dr Lahue great video do you know which enneagram makes the most money and is the most family oriented

[@twlahue]

Not sure about that one. Some times are more "driven" than others and some are more focused on connections and relationships. for sure.

[@Tom_3108]

@@moneymanagement24 as a very rough generalisation imma say social 8s. 3s are big earners but they sacrifice a lot in the family realm. Botha 8s and 3s can be workaholics but 8s have the loyalty thing going on which makes them more oriented to family perhaps. I feel all types can be make money and be good with family though as it is more related to your vibration around money than any specific behaviours. Hope this helps

[@sirnovaway6508]

I think I’m a SP one primarily and a sexual type secondarily. I was extremely possessive of my first boyfriend in high school who I believe was a SP or social one. Didn’t end well… but I learned a lot for future relationships! 😅

[@twlahue]

It's great to reflect on past relationships and learn from them. Understanding your type can really help you grow and build healthier connections in the future!

[@binablob]

Can you make a video about the social subtype? Im a social 7!

[@twlahue]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/mGOlpJ2dn7uHjNE

[@Tom_3108]

Sx 6s are not always counterphobic!

[@twlahue]

You're right! Sx 6s can definitely show a range of behaviors beyond just being counterphobic. It's fascinating how nuanced personality types can be!

[@jenpoole7291]

I am a sx 7. In college I had a roommate, who I’m pretty sure was a sx 4. I had the hardest time connecting with her. Then our other roommate told me she said, “If Jenny get asked out on one more date, I think I’ll just die!!” She had a boyfriend!! I could not figure out why it bugged her so much that I was asked out a lot. 😂😂😂

[@twlahue]

It's interesting how different personality types can create such unique dynamics in relationships. Your experience really highlights the complexities of connecting with others!

[@MeliMeli66]

4s struggle with thinking that others have it better than us without realizing that it is not often the case. When we are young we are self focused. I think sexual 4s struggle with a feeling of superiority but they still feel defective in some way. So maybe your being asked out often made her feel defective. 4s expect others to come towards us and to try to understand us but that's a big burden to place on others I think because others have life to contend with. What I like about 4s is that we are real in either a good or bad way, so at least you don't have to worry about us being snakes.

[@trevawhitmoyer682]

I took my sexual 4 brother (a musician) to a U2 concert (front row). Afterwards he admitted he spent the first half of the concert being pissed that it wasn’t HIM up on stage! 😮 😅 🤷‍♀️

[@twlahue]

The Struggle Is Real.

[@MeliMeli66]

Unfortunately, us 4s feel defective inside so the only way for us to understand our worth is to compare ourselves to others to see if we pass muster. It's a terrible way to go through life especially when we are young because it steals the joy from experiences.

[@hugdonluther2044]

Why this is not me? I am Sp/Sx. Not possessed or clingy like a f ghost. That's creepy. Seduction? No. I only date some men in the past and stopped bcs bored. I focused with family and job. My health decline so aahahaha break up. Sx means romantic. It means empathetic to their partner. But. If my partner is narcissist and abusive, na ah. Bye. Press ctrl+alt+delete buttons. I prefer alone than losing my sanity. So it depends if sx is dominant or not and what comes follow after sx. If it's sx/so or so/sx perhaps seems to be ehh.. clingy, controlling, obsessive, aggressive. No boundaries. No freedom. Lmao.

[@hugdonluther2044]

I guess not sx/sp. 🤨 Mistype i guess. Sx is not dominant. Eh

[@twlahue]

It's definitely important to prioritize your mental health and set boundaries in relationships. Knowing what works for you is key to maintaining balance and happiness!