Kinds of Messers

#sword #messer #hema #medieval #shorts

[@disnecessaurorex4908]

Can I have a knife for self defense? "Yes, but only one." *pulls out comically large knife*

[@thenexus8384]

The comically large spoon: "finally a worthy opponent, our battle will be legendary!"

[@Soridan]

"I just forge big knives, call them whatever you want." German smiths, probably.

[@randompotato2894]

There was a sword shortage back then and the knife craftsmen guilds werent allowed to make swords...therefore giant blades with knife handles

[@angela_merkeI]

Sword shortage? I heard, that the reason was the lucrativety of the sword market.

[@Soridan]

@@angela_merkeI you're not saying anything contrary. Sword shortage -> big demand -> guilds aren't allowed to make swords -> they make big knives and pretend they're completely totally absolutely different, swear on my mother's grave *wink wink*

[@dontgankmebruv7273]

@@randompotato2894 German bureaucrats strike again

[@TITANia69420]

"No, Officer this is not a Sword. This is just a Big Knife you see?"

[@Duriel181]

This is their origin. Swords were illegal, and defined as having two edges and a pommel. The Messer uses a riveted grip, like you see on kitchen knives, and typically a single edge. Legally, making it a knife.

[@TITANia69420]

@@Duriel181 and this fact makes it all the funnier.

[@The_Farmish_One]

Sir that's an assault knife. Drop it.

[@crownlexicon5225]

According to Texas laws, there is no difference

[@stevenhetzel6483]

Me after cosplaying Matilda

[@Crybaton]

Man, I fucking love German Naming Conventions... God forbit we ever actually come up for a new word for something... One of my favourites is probably the german words for Baton: Schlagstock. Which just means Beating - Stick. Zweihänder is an all time classic, because someone just looked at a very big sword and said: "Damn. I'll reckon you need two hands for that one! Wait a minute..." We don't have a word for gun, just "Schusswaffe" = "Shotweapon" because it's a weapon that shoots. Flammenwerfer because it werfs se Flammen. Flugzeugträger because it trägs se Flugzeug. You get the gist. Truly the country of poets and thinkers...

[@angela_merkeI]

That happens when your language isn't 80+% French and Latin borrowings. xD

[@ezyto]

that’s the great thing about German you can just have a Fußbodenschleifmaschinrngeräteperateursprüfer in one word!

[@Krokmaniak]

Also fun fact about that. Messers were made to bypass sword ban laws by making them with knife handle instead of sword handle and without a pommel to make them legally just big knives instead of swords, so not banned by sword ban. Name is literally "You see officer, that's a knife not a sword"

[@awuriefnejqwjmnwn4960]

This is actually great, the poetic potential of a language that allows for many neologisms is immense

[@steffenebener7332]

​@@awuriefnejqwjmnwn4960 haha, yes, thats true and is always used. Scrabble isnt popular here, btw.

[@Galardomond]

budgies in the background

[@jasonuerkvitz3756]

Wasn't there some sort of weird law about owning swords and carrying them in public so being the crafty fellows they were, the smiths came up with these work-arounds?

[@robinswords]

It's a theory that gets bounced around, but I've never seen it substantiated.

[@Lukos0036]

A whole mess of messers.

[@thomasb5666]

Kriegsmesser is my favorite sword. I would love to cook with it some day. If i ever own one i would probably put it right next to my kitchen knife set.

[@BerryBoyXD]

They’re also the coolest looking ‘swords’ out there

[@Acs2004]

Ah, the older brothers of the comically large spoon

[@collin333]

My beloved Kriegsmesser

[@danjohnston9037]

The Knife-Making Guild was being practical, not pedantic.

[@astranix0198]

Legal loopholes are your friend.

[@zinkpopovitch9519]

I prefer the term 'big Goron sword'

[@patrykjaskowski4226]

Random Devil May Cry thought: while Dante's sword, Rebellion, is an a-typical longsword with V-shaped guard, would the horns protruding from the skull (most prominent in the DMC3 version (sadly, since I loved the look of it in comparison to how they did the boy dirty in DMC5)) lend themselves to be used in a similar manner to the side extension in the guard of a messer?

[@ajayavsm7476]

I hear budgies in the background! Are they your pets?

[@robinswords]

Yup :)

[@tinycoinfromholland1391]

"thats not a knife *pulls out messer* this is a knife"

[@DamesTC]

Those are sick

[@Interrobang212]

It was even less defined in it's day. Needing exact definitions is a modern thing for weapons.

[@maxprez3370]

Thank you for your knowledge, Superman

[@rarehydra1179]

Long knife sounds like a cool last name.

[@Primal_forge]

Love your content

[@nickbutler9831]

Lang, one handed, grossmesser, two-handed straight Kriegnesser, two-handed curved. That's what I thought

[@fast1nakus]

Scharp stick has many names but only one use - to kill.

[@Montross4440]

YOU CALL THAT A KNOIFE?! 🪃

[@lionalofthedalelands184]

I’m gonna add these as rogue weapons in my dnd campaign

[@robinswords]

It'd suit them alright. They're nasty things and can come in rather compact packages. Just about any size from an actual knife to a greatsword is on the table with one of these.

[@iHateYourFace420]

One has balls on it

[@CMCSE]

Know your Messers - The Video

[@astranix0198]

Nice knife.

[@Wadser]

Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that names on ancient weapons are like names on modern weapons. It's a marketing gimmick.

[@cherryscarlett]

_Dueling Knives // Ba₺₺le Knives_ ✓

[@Simon-hd6dc]

I'd give one further distinction: The "großes Messer" is usually the smallest of these. Just... A great knife. Literally. Or a small falchion. The "langes Messer" is a long knife. Again, quite literally. It's more or less a one handed sword. Single-edged of course. The "Kriegsmesser" is the most clearly defined. The war knife. You guessed it, literally. It's what most people will probably have in mind when they think of the German fighting knife category. It's the two-handed single-edged sword. But these terms are obviously just based on patterns that we notice when looking back at history from a modern perspective. The fact that these are even called "knives" and how literal their descriptions are, should be a clear indicator of how loosely these words were used to describe fighting weapons.

[@tacticalchunder1207]

“That’s not a knife”

[@khajiitimanus7432]

So... Pyramid Head uses a Großesmesser.

[@mikewin7056]

I find it interesting how some of the more unorthodox blades, the sail daggers and the messers, have cross guards for countering where the traditional war swords barely have any cross guard... There used to be a difference in philosophy between Assault and Defense weapons, now it's just guns 🤷🏿‍♂️

[@DaTimmeh]

I'm certain that you'll find the same types of differences with guns. Just because you're not familiar with it, doesn't mean it lacks variety and attention to detail. I think there are way too many guns in the world, and it's too easy to access high caliber, high rpm weaponry, absolutely. But saying they're all the same is pretty ignorant. It doesn't further the conversation towards a solution, it makes each side hunker down further in their straw man arguments of the other side.

[@rizqirizaldo]

So... Since it's a knife, you can do reverse grip with it? Even though it might be just as big as a gladius?

[@botezsimp5808]

Just waiting on some gaint hammer content.

[@widderpro2051]

Well there also are wurfmesser

[@diagnosisninja]

Still just used to messer you up.

[@lucas_lipp]

Are they actually called Großes Messer? Because that's literally just German for big knife and I kinda love it. IoI

[@robinswords]

Yup, as that's what they are

[@lucas_lipp]

@@robinswords Yup. It just sounds so much less cool than great knife, if you know German. I was familiar with the other names, I just had to chuckle at großes Messer, since it sounds like something you mom would give you as a description for what knife to use for cooking purposes.

[@olafsson6431]

Budgie reveal video when sir???

[@ezyto]

not you leaving every german foaming at the mouth for pronouncing Großesmesser (groh-ses-mess-ser) as Grossmesser

[@The_Farmish_One]

Are those assault knives?

[@joehorstmann8027]

This exemplifies the Germans.

[@YAOZII]

Why is the two handed not even that longer than the one handed lolll

[@bobbybuche-nh2kn]

bird

[@salttrap1740]

What about pyramid heads greatknife?

[@Emanresuadeen]

Is the messer a European katana or is the katana a Japanese messer?

[@toxicity787]

Do this have cat?

[@BigSarnt]

What is the difference between a knife and a sword? In this case of course.

[@Kingdomkey123678]

The messer is a sword, it’s only called a knife because they were created by the knife maker’s guild using a loop hole to be able to legally make swords

[@56ur4]

Germans and there naming of things eh

[@nimrodthewise836]

"knives"...

[@Sage_6reen]

But wait what's the difference between a fighting knife and a sword

[@Flamme-Sanabi]

Long knife and sword, what's the difference?

[@axbrax5697]

Hilt construction. Messers have a sandwich hilt, swords jave a stick like tang, a grip that encloses the tang and a zhreaded or peined pommel. Other than that messer blades could very well also be on an falchion. Goo look up single edged bladed typography of medival europe, its very interesting

[@Flamme-Sanabi]

@@axbrax5697 oooo I see, thank you.

[@shaheer_ghazi]

I don’t understand, howcome they are knives but not swords? They look like swords to me rather than knives.

[@thaddeusgigachaddeus2954]

It's the way the handle is made, and also because it was made by the knifemakers guild instead of swordmakers. Think of it like a bakery that starts making pizza to get more money, but it calls them cakes

[@sleepykuya2955]

I still think the gross messer is cool...

[@shawnmiller508]

They all make a gross mess er something…

[@CrunchyWinters]

I Am the Thousandth Like