Kristin Talks About Her Agoraphobia | The Kitchen & Jorn Show

[@kitchenandjorn]

Comments are going to be pretty heavily moderated on this one, friends! I would say that if you have something critical to say that is 1) off topic or 2) not a gentle cute joke or 3) not a genuine technical error in this vid that I missed, I would keep it pushing today! I debated turning off the comments but I know other people would like a space to discuss to let's keep it cute! LOVE YOU! ❤❤❤❤

[@sallyfields2385]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@Thatonegirl989]

As someone that suffers with agoraphobia I really feel like the people around me don’t try to understand and I feel alone regarding it. Thank you for sharing this Kristin

[@Eventide215]

Any mental issue tends to be like that. Since people can't see it they tend to think you're making it up or don't bother to fully understand how *you* experience it. I have social anxiety issues (not officially diagnosed) but I know I get the symptoms of it. I can't really tell my family because my family are the type to roll their eyes and tell you to suck it up or act like it's an excuse. Luckily mental health awareness is definitely on the rise and people are starting to understand it more.

[@Thatonegirl989]

@ yeah that’s absolutely true, pretty much all mental illnesses are stigmatized to some degree. I know it’s difficult because it’s something they don’t experience or understand but it can be disheartening. As someone with multiple mental illnesses, people are very quick to tell me to get over it and go to the store in regard to my agoraphobia. But no one would ever say something like that about my depression. And both are equally crippling for me.

[@mothmyles]

kristin's explanation of agoraphobia is the first time i've ever realized that i've been experiencing it for years now (from my health conditions). thank you, now i can work through it more

[@kitchenandjorn]

You can do this ❤

[@kallman1206]

I definitely am there with you Kristin - working grocery store retail through the pandemic, being told "you are essential! What a hero! We can't find enough masks to give you, have you considered making them out of an old t-shirt and a coffee filter?" definitely gave me big fear that I was going to unwittingly pass on a disease that would kill dozens of my elderly customers. And now of course I feel singled out in being part of only ten or fifteen percent of people still taking precautions (even in a perpetually crowded mall), right-wing lunatics occasionally harass me for having a mask on at work as if it's any of their business... it's rough out here. Solidarity

[@Diva380]

Hey, thank you for STILL masking. I'm one of those 10%-15% of people also still masking, and I have been since March or April of 2020. I have asthma along with some other health issues and neurodivergence, with a generalized anxiety disorder being one of them. Because most people are no longer masking, I've stopped going to concerts, movie theaters, and any event where there will be a lot of people. I can't work outside my home anymore. I hate going into to stores to grocery shop and prefer pickup or delivery. I schedule my in-person medical appointments on Monday mornings, as I know the offices will be closed and I'll have less exposure at that time compared to the rest of the week. I don't just worry for myself, but for family and friends who have stopped masking or only mask occasionally. Life in the 2020s sucks. But if you're doing your best and I'm doing my best as well, that is the best we can do together for now.

[@megb9700]

I mask too! You’re not alone.

[@VIRRO_42069]

Thank you for still masking!!!

[@tinychaosmouse]

I'm sitting here in tears, only 4 minutes in, hearing from someone who experiences agoraphobia like I do. I've gone my entire life thinking I was alone, like I'm a freak and being unreasonable.... but no, you're here, telling your story that is so similar to mine... Thank you doesn't feel like enough. I'm going to have my partners watch this so they understand me and understand why I am the way I am.

[@caitlinmkearns8233]

Kristin, I have been housebound with agoraphobia and panic disorder for nearly five years and so appreciate you speaking out about it. Sending you and everyone else living with it love.

[@caitlinmkearns8233]

Also I have an audio drama on the BBC in January about a character with agoraphobia, would love to send it to you.

[@lesliemoiseauthor]

SPOILER WARNING: I'm so happy that stand up is healing you.

[@kitchenandjorn]

@@lesliemoiseauthor it really is

[@lesliemoiseauthor]

@kitchenandjorn 🫂🫂🫂

[@LazyLoonLazarus]

Agoraphobia is so hard to deal with, especially when you're neurodivergent and you've got ZERO clue that you're actually incredibly agoraphobic. I'm glad that you're slowly healing through standup, that's such a beautiful thing!

[@RB-vo4gi]

I wish society/media portrayed agoraphobia in a more realistic (more common) manner, because I always had that image of “oh, people with agoraphobia are afraid to leave their house even to walk down to the mailbox.”

[@skyrim_memes]

I can't even do this :(....

[@orangefonta]

As someone with the same problem this resonates with me so much. Especially the line about chronic illnesses clashing. They feed into each other and it’s a balancing act to try and treat them without making one or more worse in the process. Dealing with both chronic pain and mental health complicates it even further. Sending all the spoons. 💜

[@copywritergena1225]

Thank you for this. I never heard this mental health issue talked about so clearly. As a child, I passed out in 6th grade and it was very traumatic. I was being bullied, the teacher did not care that I passed out, it was during a graduation ceremony rehearsal. The next year or so I suffered panic attacks for the exact reason you describe -- an inciting incident made me scared I would pass out again. I did not become agoraphobic, but very scared. I once had a panic attack so bad I had to sit in a convenience store for hours until my father picked me up because I literally could not move. Home is also my safe space where panic attacks won't happen. In my 30s I was diagnosed with OCD. I have checking OCD, "asking questions" OCD, all or nothing thinking OCD, and ruminating on problems OCD. Thanks for your vulnerability and educating us. I'm usually here for the Trader Joe's content, LOL, but this was good to watch.

[@heywhatupitsash7389]

I get agoraphobic in hard times. Its something that ive recently have come to terms with. Its a hard thing to discuss with others, so a lot of respect that youre willing to open this conversation up! Very glad to know im not alone❤

[@MichellePondueCruz]

I've been doing CBT/DBT for 20 years, and it has been a life saver. I also get panic attacks, mild agoraphobia, have mild OCD, etc. They all are very low level symptoms, but together they can cause me to "hermit" for days at a time. The pandemic didn't help, but I made my way through it a lot better than I could have by practicing my mental exercises.

[@korinneallen8101]

Thank you for explaining this in a better way that is easy to understand. I will show this video to people to help them understand! I love you both and hope your holidays are great!

[@hmmcms1]

Thank you for being willing to share ❤

[@mistyautumnryvlin5791]

Thank you for making this video. So many people don’t understand and judge. They don’t realize how exhausting it can be to just not be able to get yourself hyped up enough to simply get ready to leave the house because of the anxiety and dread of ACTUALLY leaving the house. Grocery shopping, doctors appointments, etc. it’s all just too much, anticipation of each interaction… 🤦‍♀️🥲 the embarrassment of my other health issues becoming apparent in public…. just thank you

[@definitelynotachangeling]

I have the exact sand brand of agoraphobia. My fears are all related to the symptoms of my P.O.T.S./Ehlers Danlos/Endometriosis/BPD/Autism/PNES -not the whole list- so it can be really scary for me to be out and about. Thank you for educating people about the other side of agoraphobia!

[@ashten-orion]

i also have all these things. are you also queer and/or trans?? i see so many people suffering with this same handful of things and it’s really interesting to me

[@lupem9226]

I've had panic attacks and agoraphobia since I was 12. I am now 45. It's been a long road, but I'm glad it's known more now than when I was young. One day at a time is how I deal.

[@barbarastockham4036]

Kristin, thank you for opening up about this. I have learned a lot from you and you help a lot of people by talking about your struggles.

[@mickm8654]

I struggle with leaving my house, attending events etc for so many of the same reasons, this is yet another one of your videos that made me feel really valid and seen and gave me hope that there are other people out there like me. Thank you both for sharing your health experiences it is so important! ❤

[@sheHerTheyThem]

Spoonies Unite !!❤Adautistic with cptsd , anxiety, social anxiety, ocd and multiple comorbidities with health issues, zofran is a goddess 🙌, as is promethazine which I take both ( i have a messed up digestive system to boot) I understand the struggles and you cant just treat one thing because then the balance seems to be created and something happens to one of the other multiple comorbidities we suffer from. Being a Spoonie means we are always trying to find a balance in our mental and physical health . Im holding space for Kristen and all my fellow Spoonies here ❤

[@loganreese9134]

I have severe panic disorder and emetaphobia (fear of throwing up) and OCD. I very strongly identify with the “fear of being trapped”, if I don’t have an easy out it puts me in pure panic. It’s pure hell and can be so damaging to your mental health and everyday life. I hate that anyone has to go through this although I find comfort in knowing I’m not the only one living like this. I pray everyone going through this is healed of this awful illness.

[@loganreese9134]

I’m very impressed and proud of you for being able to go on tour with this!

[@skyrim_memes]

❤

[@sapphic_seraphim]

Thank you for talking about your agoraphobia with us, Kristin! As a 23 year old who’s been housebound with it for nearly a decade, I often feel so alone. So seeing you use your platform to talk about it means everything to me. Big love to you always! 💓

[@cnsohm]

As an emetophobe, when you mentioned Zofran, I literally burst into tears! Zofran IS ✨️magic✨️! Thank you for being this vulnerable, Kristen. I’ve been anxious for so long. Brb... gotta get one of those workbooks 🩷

[@kitchenandjorn]

I’m so glad that helped you, Zofran changed my life! 🎉🎉🎉

[@wheresmyweavesis]

Thank you for talking about this Kristin! We love you so so much, and we’re here to support you! As someone that struggles with agoraphobia, thank you for being a safe space and being real about the struggles of it.

[@lschultz3022]

This was a great way to dispel the general belief that agoraphobia means you can't leave your home. I am perfectly functional but no matter where I go I always have that 'what if' feeling. There are things I just won't do anymore (festivals, big outdoor events) but so far I can manage the necessary things like shopping, airports etc. I'm probably low on the scale but I can totally relate to everything you said. I have very clear understanding of the origins of it in my life. This is not a mystery illness. Self awareness and being able to objectively look at yourself, your history, family and experiences is the key.

[@kitchenandjorn]

EXACCCCTLYYYYYY. think it's super important to recognize that it's not a "mystery illness"! There are reasons for how we feel.

[@bella-mccord]

thank you so much for sharing your struggles and journey with this. While i haven't been officially diagnosed with agoraphobia, I have really been struggling with it, with it increasing immensely this year. Hearing you speak on different symptoms and reasons WHY one may get anxious was also extremely validating as I always tell myself I'm just being dramatic or lazy or whatever. I truly appreciate you speaking on this and may try to share it with my father, as he doesn't understand any of my mental illnesses at all and gets annoyed. For example, he was bothered that i didn't celebrate Thanksgiving with the family because of my anxieties and my eating disorder. It's so disheartening when others don't understand or believe it but, again, this video really validated a lot of my feelings. I'm so sorry you are also struggling with this but i cannot thank you enough for speaking out on it and sharing your experiences. Sorry for the novel. Love you all!! 🖤

[@KokiriChild1]

Thank you for making this video. I've had agoraphobia for most of my life and it feels validating to hear others dealing with similar feelings. It's something that's hard to talk about with people when it feels like they won't understand and will judge me for it.

[@NoodleNayru]

cried through this whole video because this is EXACTLY my experience as well. 2 years ago I had an inciting incident that led to my agoraphobia. I feel so seen. Zofran is truly magic lol

[@Betherick1985]

I can’t imagine what this must’ve been like, especially going to the powwow! That was probably daunting! We love you, and we support you! ❤

[@Cheyscrochetshop]

Girlllll I'm so happy you're talking about this. Bc I have lots of fear around leaving the house due to my chronic illnesses

[@Cheyscrochetshop]

So when I do leave the house for a long period of time I arm myself with a large amount of physical accommodations to keep me comfortable physically and mentally

[@RSkies]

Jen talking about the damage the psyche endures and has to heal from after a panic attack (or rounds of several)…that hit deep. It’s the second wind of the boss fight you don’t plan on having to fight. Thank you for putting that so perfectly.

[@shroom2267]

I am agoraphobic too! It has gotten much better over the years but I still really atruggle with things like restaurants, any form of transportation that I'm not driving, and concerts as well. I have found some things helpful, like going to places by myself so i dont have to coordinate my escapes with anyone aka if i am somewhere and i panic, i can just disappear. I dont have to wait for anyone to finish dinner, no one will worry about where i am, i dont have to confess to anyone, i can just go home. For concerts, i go with my family to one every year and though i have struggled almost every time, this year was the best yet! I talk to everyone I'm with and let them know whats going on. I sit in an aisle seat for easy leaving. I have calming stuff with me like meds and cold water. Everyone im with knows the deal. I find exactly where the nearest bathrooms are. And i drive myself, so if I need to go home i can. I also always carry zofran with me! All these things i figured out through many panic attacks and horrible days, but the upward trajectory makes it worth it. Edit to add: the part about backslides was much appreciated. The times in my life when agoraphobia has hit me the hardest have been when i am not able to see the place i am living as "inside" or "home." And instead, only my parents' places are "inside." So when i am trying to live at my own place i am constantly having agoraphobia because it feels like "outside" and "unsafe." It has happened multiple times in my life, and it is really helpful to me to remember that it has always gotten better every time.

[@caitlingoodemote3830]

Kristin- I also struggle with Agoraphobia, which has also attached itself to a panic disorder and have since I was teenager. I really appreciate your vulnerability and being willing to share your own experiences with this!

[@Eventide215]

I feel similar to what you were saying about your friends going out of their way to accommodate you. I have social anxiety issues and it's weird because I want to mention it to people close to me but at the same time I don't want them to be different because of it. I had to have a fairly in-depth conversation with my best friend about it before. Had to tell him how I want him to treat me like anyone else but to understand I might need to leave or take a break at some point. I get what Jen means too about how obviously your friends want to do it but it still makes you feel bad that they have to be different around you. It's especially bad when people don't fully understand it and end up going a little too far.. like I have had people start talking to me in a different tone almost as if I'm a child or they start speaking softly/slowly which just makes it awkward and more anxiety-inducing for me. Also, CBT is great for a lot of mental illness. A lot of it does come down to having to retrain your body and mind. Typically logically you know something's not wrong but for some reason the rest of your body and mind are practically demanding that it's true. That's why for example you have reactions when just going near a restaurant. It's typically because you had some kind of episode in a restaurant and so now your body thinks that place caused it so you feel that way just being near it. It really sucks because, as you said, it could be your favorite place that starts making you feel that way.

[@leannadawn6943]

You are so open and honest with your audience. Shining the light on mental illness is scary, but it makes us other sickos feel seen and understood. Love you two so much!!!

[@graciemae1982]

I have to say that the way you described your agoraphobia was spot on and I feel it. Restaurants and movie theaters are my pitfalls. I am always looking for the nearest exit and bathroom to escape. The tightening of my chest and butterflies hit when I am in large open places with lots of people. It’s easier for me to just stay home but I miss the company of people I love. Having just recently been diagnosed with a rare form of leukemia and going through a stem cell transplant and having a weakened immune system and now being forced to endure my own private COVID scenario again has been tough on me mentally and it’s hard to describe it to others that don’t feel the same way. I applaud you for this video and I hope you continue to work on it. My doctors have told me to get out and live my life. That has become extremely challenging now but I’m trying. Every day I set small goals to see if I can achieve it. Some days are good and some aren’t.

[@susananderson8995]

Thank you for sharing your struggles. It’s helpful for others to hear that they are not alone when they experience something similar to you. ❤

[@heli_26]

I suffer from agoraphobia and my boyfriend has been the biggest help ever, because he can tell when it's bad enough for me to stay home and calm down, and when it's fine enough to force me to go out and stuff. Also seeing you accomplish so many things even with agoraphobia, it's giving me a lot of hope for the future. For my future.

[@SR-cl2yg]

I liked how you described the two different kinds and how it’s about dealing with a bodily action or reaction. I think it’s amazing at your level of discomfort and anxiety, you are still able to flourish in your stand up career ❤

[@beehuts]

honestly, all three of you (to include brie) have been such an inspiration to me throughout the years. it sucks being strong and brave and living your life and taking care of yourself, so im glad you all have each other for support ❤️

[@PumpkinFinch]

My agoraphobia isn't about something bodily happening to me. Ir is about being trapped and unable to escape, that I can't get home. That if anything at all happens, I will be stuck somewhere and unable to leave. Even talking about it gets me scared. I have trouble going to friends' houses, anywhere alone, even if it is things I'd love and people I love. Being alone outside my saftey house is terrifing to me. I had huge backslide a decade ago and now it has improved, I was even able to get my lisecnece but it always there and I'm always fighting.

[@lanceortega1366]

I appreciate you sharing your story, Kristin, and I hope it gets a little bit easier for you and for anyone else who suffers from agoraphobia

[@missmousemiddleton]

Thank you for talking about this. ❤ I think you just made a lot of people feel seen. ❤❤❤

[@awkward567]

Hi, I love you, thanks for talking about important stuff with your platform!

[@kestrelhawkins8728]

COVID totally freaks me out too. I have lung damage from H1N1 in 2009, and so I wear a mask everywhere, still. That is kind of my comfort in this weird time, but I also take my mask off if I am in a safer place, like an outdoor event, or far enough away from other people and on stage (I play guitar), so that helps.

[@alexandramotzan]

What helped me was asking myself “so WHAT if I throw up? I’m human”. Oh and having plane throw up baggies with me at all times. ❤ you got this!

[@lizardlace9510]

thank you so much for sharing your experiences Kristin!! I have loved ones that have agoraphobia and this has helped me understand what they’re dealing with more! (with the understanding everyone’s experience is different!!) Thank you for your courage and vulnerability in your sharing!! it so helps to destigmatise agoraphobia and mental illness overall 💖💖 p.s. as a chronically ill, physically disabled, person with mental illness myself, i very much appreciate the discussion of how your agoraphobia interacts with your chronic illness(es) !!

[@MelissaWisian]

Thank you for sharing what medications you have and what they do! It really helps alleviate some of the anxiety of potentially taking them in the future!!

[@kitchenandjorn]

You bet! That is the whole point, to remove some of the mystery!

[@abbygreiner1632]

WOW. I have been dealing with these type of feelings for the past year and never had the words to explain it. Thank you for talking about this!

[@Niteotter51]

Thank you. Both of you. My wife has been putting up with this for 40 yrs!! I think I feel a bit less guilty. 🤫 She’s probably well over it - but no, she’s just not going to answer that question. And we’re not premenstrual in our 70’s. Warm fuzzies for you Kristin. And gratitude for a friend like Jen. 🎂 here’s a cake for y’all.

[@abbyburns3127]

First and foremost, thank you for continuing to share such important topics! On a lighter note, Zofran was a lifesaver when I was dealing with gallbladder related nausea for a year or two before I finally got it removed! I do have a bone to pick with whoever made the dissolvable tablets that god awful strawberry taste but box breathing through 30 seconds of a terrible taste was totally worth the hours of not feeling like I was constantly going to hurl!

[@ProtectWomenDesigns]

I really appreciated this. I have a lot of trauma-related chronic conditions and, as a likely result, other chronic illnesses. Even though agoraphobia isn’t one of mine, it meant so much to hear you talking so candidly about it and your medical team. (I also have an elaborate team).

[@lassoroot]

Covid + my already present social anxiety was really a one two punch straight into agoraphobia for me! For me, strangers scare me. I'm always afraid that people will talk to me, attack me, or I'll get into a confrontation. It was bad enough that I wouldn't leave my small apartment for MONTHS at a time - even going out into the hall would scare me. But the thing is, even though I felt safe in the apartment I felt miserable there too since I'd basically imprisoned myself there for years - I was a recent grad but I couldn't make any move to start the rest of my life and seeing everyone else move on without me made me so sad and angry and even think about ending my own life which I saw as a burden on my parents. On a lighter note, my family recently moved somewhere with less people around and I've been trying to get outside at least once a week. I don't manage it sometimes but the times I do make it outside feel like a huge improvement! Thank you for shedding light on this topic, it can feel like especially post pandemic people don't really take agoraphobia seriously so it was really nice to hear someone treating it as an actual condition.

[@telepathicbutterfly8855]

I really love and appreciate this video. Kristin! Your vulnerability is beautiful ❤ I just had a long stint of agoraphobia starting around same time as you, I was actually relieved I wasn’t expected to leave the house during Covid. It took my long term partner breaking up with me and having to move back home at 45 🎉to begin to handle being in public again without the dizziness and heart palpitations. I’m normally perceived as a very social confident human which is partially true but when I shut down the iron gates are locked and if I had a trust fund I’d be in trouble 😂 I think I’m sorta back to ignoring the root of this again so I really needed to see this 🦋

[@kelsieheathcote5830]

Thank you for sharing ❤️ i always feel awkward being vulnerable and talking about this kind of stuff with my friends. It’s empowering seeing someone else talk about it

[@katherinewilliams1124]

Yay kitchen and jurn!!

[@SickleRose]

I relate so much to your experience, and it helps to hear I'm not not alone. Thank you for sharing. ❤

[@marissaeller8445]

the discussion of zofran as an actual expression of magic is so important

[@mems1792]

I have emetophobia and I feel like what's being described in this video fits with some of my experiences. It's such a hard thing to get through I'm happy you have supportive people around you!

[@Lady.Fern.]

Same one thing that has helped a bit is carrying sick bags with absorbency tabs in the bottom for me or others around me if I’m going to be in an enclosed space with others. I will wear a Fanny pack with two or three of them in there if a bag/ purse is not convenient for the situation.

[@mems1792]

@Lady.Fern. that's actually a really good idea thank you! It would be a relief for me to know I have something in case

[@awkward567]

I feel like doing improv has done more for my social anxiety than years of therapy ever did. Or maybe it’s just reaching my 30s and not giving as many fucks. In any case, I’m glad you found the thing that motivates you. And side note, I’m so glad Brie is out and living her best life now too.

[@fishelle80]

I’m having an “I want to give up” day. Thank you for this video ❤️❤️❤️

[@laurihayes1231]

I am very sorry that you go through this but so incredibly proud of you for managing it. I personally dread being invited places or having to go out of my apartment. However, I don't think it's a phobia or anxiety. I just enjoy wholeheartedly being at home with my 3 fur babies and relaxing. 🥰

[@TalenynWren]

I think lockdown and then working remotely for a couple years after has trained my brain to not want to leave my home. I get anxious that as soon as I leave my house is going to catch fire, something is going to happen to my animals, a break in, something else horrible and I have to fight to not turn around and go back.

[@T0kenfunny]

This means a lot to me I've had agoraphobia since 2017 that made me drop out of school thank you

[@claudiaelodie]

Thank you so much for talking about this! I have horrible anxiety that the current Covid pandemic made soooooo bad! I've been trying to do more to get myself back out there, but it's so hard. I'm so flipping proud of you!!!!!!!

[@itsokhesjamaican]

This reeeeeeeally hits close to home!!! My worst year was 2010-2011 and my worst places were grocery stories/IKEA/any large store with fluorescent lighting. Such a mindfuck when you know it makes no sense but your brain and body haven’t gotten the message. So glad you’ve found standup!!

[@Katie80-501]

Hmmmm, I'm finding that this video is really relatable. While that is a little concerning, thank you for making it.

[@NarcissaDeville]

I cannot tell you how relatable so much of this is. 2019 being an absolute shit show for my mental health because of a shit job. The anxiety, dizzy spiral, I don't really go out to restaurants and going to the grocery store is a nightmare. I didn't even realize that what I had was a form of agoraphobia. Not a great time BUT I do feel like this is stuff to work on. So thank you.

[@chloesmithwalker7565]

Appreciate you sharing your experience with agoraphobia. I have claustrophobia so my triggers are crowds and confined spaces. Watching this makes me want to try and work on it.

[@kelleyoco]

I'd be interested to know if you think the mother in the movie "Kneecap" is a good representation of agoraphobia. I thought it was well portrayed, though they don't label it as such in the movie.

[@cashmoney865]

the risk of covid when leaving the house is very real. before 2020, medical professionals masked in lots of settings, but now that masks are ‘political’ they question me for wearing one. when i am sick. in the urgent care. and i have asthma! i live in rural texas so i feel very pressured and singled out when i wear a mask in public but i refuse to get others sick or put myself in a situation to disable myself.

[@carmenattallah6244]

Thank you for being so honest about your struggles with this. I guess I had a warped idea of what agoraphobia is. And the funny thing is that I have told my therapist that I never leaves my house and she doesn't seem to think it is a real issue. Mine started after my son died. I've been in regular therapy and grief therapy but I still don't want to leave my house or socialize with people.

[@annabeck5016]

I have this type of agoraphobia. and this made me feel so so seen. im terrified of having a seizure in public. thank you for talking about this bc no one really does 💜

[@daniel.lennon]

I had agoraphobia for about a year and it was so debilitating. I still have remnants of it that get in the way of life sometimes. It sucks. I think I can say with confidence that agoraphobia was one of the worst (if not the worst) mental health issues I have ever dealt with. It was absolute hell and it affected every single thing I did. It was constant emotional dysregulation and high-level anxiety for a long time. I know a lot of people with agoraphobia are afraid to go out alone, but I was the opposite. The social pressure of the presence of another person was too much for me to handle. At one point, being perceived was too much. I couldn't go on my front porch without feeling nauseous. I couldn't do my virtual therapy/psychiatry appointments. I had to take (prescribed) benzos to manage. My mental health issues have almost killed me, but there's something about agoraphobia that is so different from anything else I've experienced. I had PTSD and the level of nervous system activation from the agoraphobia was similar to that of having flashbacks except it was *constant*. I really wish people understood 1. what agoraphobia even is and 2. how genuinely dreadful it is in the truest sense of the word. I'm saying this as someone who had 4 anxiety disorders (social, generalized, PTSD, agoraphobia), *severe* depression, ARFID, undiagnosed (at the time) autism, untreated (at the time) ADHD, and gender dysphoria that I decided to torture myself with for years instead of seeking medical intervention sooner. The worst year of my life was the year I had agoraphobia. There was obviously a lot going on at the time, but there's something unexplainable about agoraphobia that just sets it apart from everything else. I have more or less recovered from most of my mental health issues and have actually graduated from my psychiatrist nearly two years ago and therapy in the summer, but I haven't been the same since having agoraphobia and who knows if I ever will be again Edit: okay wait the more I watch the video the more I'm like wait do I still have agoraphobia akjdhfkaj THIS IS GREAT

[@meredithwemhoff9270]

Thank you for sharing your journey! 🫶🏼

[@claireosgood5971]

Love this Kristin, thank you so much for sharing

[@Ambient_dreamer]

Wow… I’ve had ✨anxiety ✨for 20 years but I’m just learning right now I relate exactly to Agoraphobia. Thanks for talking about this. ❤️

[@DianaDivinatas]

Turns out my own agoraphobia was a result of undiagnosed autism! I was always afraid that I'd leave the house everyone would just know I didn't belong and wasn't a "normal human". Once I figured out I was autistic, it's been helping TONS with avoid panic attacks and meltdowns!

[@laurenjarvis-gibson4972]

Oh, Kristin!!! I totally understand you. My anxiety gives me fear of swallowing and I can't go to restaurants anymore. Not even my faves. I'm so sorry!

[@pamfogarty3087]

Thank you for sharing!! You are so brave, keep up the good fight xx

[@khawk9072]

If you think you would benefit from it, another book I would recommend is "Freedom from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder- A Personalized Recovery Program for Living with Uncertainty " by Johnathan Grayson, PhD. It's been a game changer for me with my own OCD, which I know wasn't the exact focus of this video but it's in the same ballpark. Also, thank you both for being so open & willing to share your experiences with different disabilities and hardships. It really helps so many to feel less alone 💚

[@TheRaggedLuthien]

This was extremely helpful. Thank you ❤

[@emilylawrence5234]

Thank you for sharing your experience! I've been dealing with this too this year. Starting EDMR and exposure therapy and feeling hopeful!

[@nikkiwilliams7152]

So I have bipolar and pretty bad anxiety and when things are bad I hunker down at home where I feel safe to feel those feelings. When I the pandemic hit, I jokingly said I have been preparing for the quarantine that we all had to do. Everyone around me struggled but all of my coping skills...painting, puzzles, staying home were in my wheelhouse. The fear of getting covid was a different story. But staying home? Say less! I still fall into times when I don't leave for a week and my husband will say when is the last time you left? Then there are times I'm out a lot. Thanks for sharing your story

[@EllenHamptonFilgo]

As someone who puked daily for nine months straight through 2 pregnancies, I can also attest to the miracle drug Zofran! I'm so glad that you're doing better especially though doing stand up.

[@TheSightOfTheStars]

Zofran is like fucking magic, hell yeah.

[@cherylthompsonsmith1733]

Also, thank you Jen.

[@InfernalFelidae]

Lockdown really planted the seeds of agoraphobia for me too, but a lot of it was also... the influx of mass pew-pews? Eventually my husband's therapist decided I had agoraphobia and told him and because of how it's portrayed in media I was like "UH- NO. MIND YOUR BUSINESS?? I DON'T DO THAT" (spoiler alert: also autistic and taking it too literally.) Only to eventually realize once I stopped going out on weekly grocery trips... runs... theatres, malls... that OH... I might actually be agoraphobic. But before all that, I was so reliant of caffeine. Once I stopped doing all the exhausting things outside, I stopped having caffeine. Now I'm starting to think I should just to give myself controlled caffeine induced panic attacks! WOO!

[@janalucke9739]

i have that too, I guess. I had an episode of 24/7 pain and couldn't walk without breaking down screaming. I had no help. Had to go out every day regardless. No money for transportation that i could use inside, e.g. when grocery shopping. I broke down every couple steps. It was absolutely horrific. But yeah, that's life. Took me half a year to not be a complete nervous wreck just exiting my apartment

[@TheSightOfTheStars]

I had a super similar experience with the pandemic, where I'd hit rock bottom and was recovering from a surgery to treat a chronic pain condition, but also, suicidal depression and anxiety that was made 100x worse by the pain. And so, the pain was finally gone, and I was getting better, and then WHAM. It was like hitting a brick wall at full speed. My agoraphobia went INSANE, especially because I live with my mom who's immunocompromised, so all of the uncertainty at the start of COVID was like gasoline on a fire.

[@anthropomorphisis]

Agoraphobia for me is so hard to describe because I don't have a specific thought all the time. It's not always like "what if I get in my car and get in an accident" or "what if someone attacks me when I'm walking" it just culminates in this primal fear of stepping out the front door and living the life I know I deserve.

[@anthropomorphisis]

You're really brave for talking about this!

[@hannah50353]

Another Agoraphobic sufferer here, it's debilitating and limiting and terrifying all at once 😢Please be careful of exposure therapy, for those of us who are neurodivergent it can traumatise us 😢

[@aliceboss3134]

ok weird way to find out i have agoraphobia

[@kitchenandjorn]

It's a weird time to be a human! 😂

[@bradjocelynleenstra7010]

I didn’t know this was a thing, but I absolutely don’t trust my body to not keep it together while out, fainted at the dentist in September. Thank you for sharing your experiences!! I’m going to look into this more now and talk to my therapist about it 😂❤️ Also love both of your outfits! That sweater is so fun Jen!

[@kitchenandjorn]

Yay I am glad you are going to get some help for this ❤

[@Sue1988]

thank you for talking about this, as I'm someone with a long list of illnesses

[@CarolineNotCarolynBoyd]

Thank you for sharing about this, Kristin! Makes me feel so much less alone dealing with my own mental health struggles. Also, side note--WHERE did you find that absolutely beautiful dress?!?!

[@cherylthompsonsmith1733]

I have, had?, PPA then didn’t resolve and was then GAD. And my God your journey is familiar. Different triggers, but CBT was a huge help. I wanted to comment because there DOES become a time when you get to wean down or off the drugs, and when you have challenged yourself on everything you care about. (Then you get to decide if it’s worth avoiding something you always found gross bc it’s also now scary, or if it’s just ok to keep avoiding it.) *hugs* and thank you for being so public about your journey.

[@kitchenandjorn]

It’s so great that you’ve been able to make such progress with therapy! Honestly I need to get back into it lol 😂

[@cherylthompsonsmith1733]

@ eventually, you might get “graduated” from CBT. I usually referred to this as “being kicked out.” But, seriously, there becomes a point when you know all the stuff they’re trying to show you and you get graduated to do it on your own and come back in if you have problems like a second kid and a second round of PPA….

[@sandhya315]

This was an amazing video yall 👏🏾 This is actually making me reconsider meds to manage mine tbh. As it is cptsd related and has been made much worse by long covid symptoms. I'm realizing that I've never really seen someone openly talk about agoraphobia as related to ocd etc and in exactly this way. It felt good to nod along in agreement while in this gay ass space that I enjoy most Friday afternoons lol.

[@alexmurrin]

Holy crap I didn't know that's what it's called... now I need to do some research I just assumed this was all anxiety... thanks for being open and talking about it!!!

[@kitchenandjorn]

It's a type of anxiety but identifying it by name helps!