June vlog: I'm Writing A KNITTING BOOK! & Three Months w/ the Baby

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June vlog: I'm Writing A KNITTING BOOK! & Three Months w/ the Baby
Hello and welcome to a vlog where I share what's been going on in June as we travel to Portugal with the baby for the first time, and I share some huge news - I'm writing another knitting book! ⚡️
I'm so excited to finally be able to share more about this project that I've been working on behind the scenes for months already. The knitting book will be published later this year (2024).
Three months with the baby has gone by so fast! It's been quite intense as you can imagine, and my emotions have been all over the place as I try to adapt to this new lifestyle and role as a Mom.
Hope you enjoy this video, thank you for watching 💕
Kika
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[@Kutovakika]

🚀 The first 40 subscribers using the coupon code "KUTOVAKIKA" will receive a 30% discount on their first year of subscription. Visit my link to claim your offer akiflow.com/Kutovakika.

[@verenameyer9046]

Hi , I hope you are all right 😢. Miss your Podcast and your Family… all the best from a big Fan from switzerland 🇨🇭

[@ShannaCarlson525]

My dog heard you crying through the TV and came over to cuddle to make you feel better. He ended up looking at the TV and whining because he couldn't cuddle you better. You are very much loved, Kika. Being a mom is HARD. You're not the only one. Even my big golden retriever loves you from across the world!

[@nadiash3187]

how sweet

[@LadyPatienceK]

Good doggy. 😊

[@ludouglas1]

I had a sweet dog like that. I'd be upset and she'd jump on to the lounge chair and sit by me, turning her little head side to side. Trouble was her whimpering made ME cry more hahahahahaha! Once someone goes out in sympathy with you, it makes you worse :-)

[@Noneya5241]

Awww what a sweetie it made me cry cuz I miss my dog so much and he used to do the same thing❤️❤️❤️

[@justmejust4553]

Life is rushed enough as it is. Don't put so much pressure on yourself....take it one day at a time, if it takes 6 months.....no worries. your book will be out when it's out. Do not burn your candle for other peoples expectations, you must come first

[@margaretroberts6258]

Very good advice!🌷❤️🇨🇦

[@joseserne6450]

Amen

[@pc8863]

Absolutely. Take a deep breath, and allow yourself to be human.

[@moniquemeijer4671]

I paused the video watching you break down. As a grandmother I want to say, enjoy the most precious time and that is NOW. Yes its overwelming and yes its exausting and yes your house will be a mess sometimes and yes you will blame youself for a lot of things ( that what Mothers do) but please take a step down if needed and only step up if you can. We will wait for your book, we will wait for your video’s . Time doesn’t wait, spend it with your little boy. As we say here in the Netherlands “Dust if you must, but the world's out there With the sun in your eyes, and the wind in your hair; A flutter of snow, a shower of rain, This day will not come around again.” Big hugs.

[@kiarashooks444]

[@catrionahaston1420]

Exactly what you said. Time simply flies by, they grow so fast and in the blink of an eye it seems, they are adults. Kika, you are doing great!! Don't forget yourself in this completely bewildering time. xx

[@user-lf4kf9oh4s]

Love that saying!! I’ll try to remember it 😊

[@freestonegirl]

I actually have that poem on my office wall! Love it. Great advice

[@jeannepien4565]

It will all be fine. I'm a 67-year-old Grandma with an 8- and 5-year-old Granddaughters who are in school full time. I cry because I have no more babies to watch. They are the dessert of life! The cleaning can wait. No one ever says you're a good Mom because you have clean kitchen floors. Enjoy your son. The book will get done. You are a Strong Mom. I love all your patterns. Hug that baby tight.

[@moniquemeijer4671]

Amen. ❤

[@creativian68]

I am commenting on your first sentence: it wil all be fine. My grandmother was born in 1915, lived through two world wars, lost her husband in a terrible accident, but still she had the strength to to support and encourage her sons and grandchildren with the words "det blir nog bra", ie. "it will all be fine" ❤

[@goossensmarianne5940]

And it will be alright, be kind and patient with yourself. ❤

[@Knittingmylifeaway]

You are right!

[@hannahash604]

From a mama of 4, I will say this..... you don't get this back. This chapter, this babyhood, this teeeeeny bit of time with your 1st born. My oldest is 20, and I don't regret a day that I put work aside and spent time with my kids. Those are moments I can never get back. Take your time, all of your knit fans love you and will be here when you're ready to support you ♡♡♡ take a breath mama, you got this!

[@offplumbnan]

i'm 70 and those precious times where I STOPPED what I was doing and focused, really focused, on *them* are the rue string of pearls. NOTHING else is as important as the children you have birthed. THAT is priority. So right.

[@lisadonovanlukas]

I have one son (all grown up now), and I feel the same way. The precious time of babyhood goes by in the blink of an eye. Your creativity and success will be there for you too. ❤

[@brandiealeman9377]

You just had a baby. Your body created a whole human being. Give yourself grace.

[@WildernessgalM]

Agreed ♥️🙏🙏🙏's

[@fiolett.patterns]

Kika, take a deep breath. All of us mothers have been there. You are the best mother for Edvin. Focus on that. Remember that you need time for yourself too. And go ahead with your book project. I hope you bring out a Spanish version!

[@jmdes8]

Dear Kika, I was crying with you as you shared because I REMEMBER those moments so well. I had 3 babies. So many new mothers try to do too much after their first baby. It's a huge learning curve, and your mind is kind of racing, you feel powerful, and then your body/emotions say NO, slow down. With my #2 and #3 baby I was wiser, and I let my housework go, I napped when my baby napped, and I ate a lot of nourishing food every day, plus "nutritional yeast". I had buckets of breast milk with #2 and #3. Believe me - this was magic. I felt so much better. You are exactly what Edwin needs, just please please (like many other commenters say) put yourself first, rest and eat and sleep whenever you can. You will feel so much better. We are cheering for you (with tears in my eyes).

[@phoebereparaz3382]

Great advice!!❤

[@michelleweinberg8120]

Postpartum anxiety is so common. You are so brave to share the whirlwind of emotions that new moms deal with,and I’m sure you’ve helped some other new mom out there feel less alone. ❤ Take care of yourself and know that you’re doing a great job!

[@bernbee26]

Yes! 🙌

[@kristiwood2926]

Every woman listening to your struggles absolutely completely understands!! We have have all been there and feeling what you are feeling! Give yourself GRACE and know it will pass!

[@bethanyrich2944]

OMG sweet lady! Welcome to motherhood! Please please please be patient and kind to yourself! It will never be enough in your mind, so be kind to yourself. Your baby is thriving, all the rest doesn't matter. I am looking forward to your new book! Love your videos!

[@libbybowles]

After I had kids I remember after a particularly hard day thinking, "being a mom is just a matter of waking up and deciding who you're going to disappoint that day." All too often that person was me. There is so much pressure. You're not alone, and your awareness is a testament to how great a job you are doing... and you know we are all so grateful you are still creating. 💛

[@ColleenNichol-n8z]

Baby blues are normal. You're both doing a fantastic job. Life will get exhausting, and time will fly by. It's important to have some self care, leave mess, stay in your pjs, do what you can when you can. No-one is judging you. You've got this Kika it will get easier. Loads of positive thoughts. ❤❤❤

[@amandaperinotto8883]

This is a really good representation of the difficulties women face when they want to be a mother AND have a career. I’m a mom myself and I see so many comments saying to slow down, but I genuinely understand the desire to build your company and and the fulfillment that comes with that after working so hard for so many years.

[@harmonizetheworld]

A tip from a 70 year old who has brought up 3 children primarily on my own. Children grow and change so fast, it is a time of bonding and enjoyment that is so valuable for you both. It creates memories you will treasure for the rest of your life. If you try to do too much that takes you away from those special moments and you will find the time has gone. Prioritize your baby and when baby sleeps, rest, knit if you you like. Writing a book is always a pressure even with out a publisher deadline. Is there someone who can come in for a couple of hours every other day to just keep the house stuff ticking over? People pleasing will only wear you out. Establishing a routine so you know when you can totally devote all time and energy to only one topic at a time. Be totally present with your gorgeous son and dont think about house and book, then when he rests, you can think totally knitting and book. Keep videos short and sweet to keep those ticking over for the time being. Having a baby, and rearing children is demanding, you also had an op to recover from. Be gentle with yourself and your time and things will gradually settle. You have a loving husband who I am sure will help you navigate this current overwhelm. Remember "All things will pass".

[@eforcanda]

Post whenever you feel you want to. We will happily be here waiting for you and ready to provide you our love and support. Trust us. We aren’t going anywhere nor do we expect anything from you besides your happiness. ❤ you got this.

[@moniquebaumann6847]

Sending you a big hug. I love the fact that you're such an honest person and not trying to fake anything. What you described is exactly what I felt like when I had my first child, and I felt so guilty not being in a big happy baby bubble. It's a huge transformation becoming a mother and it takes time. I had my second child in April, and now I'm finally able to enjoy the baby months because I know how quickly they will be over. I think what is so overwhelming about becoming a parent is the fact that you have to say goodbye to a part of your old self. It takes time and work. Sending you all the love for the rollercoaster ride of parenthood!❤️

[@Nana-lk3yv]

Dear Kika, you are so strong! I felt every word to my bones when you said everything is overwhelming. Hormons are having a party right now. No one will be mad if there’s no video from you, the book will get finished and be awesome! But really important is your family and your health. Don’t be so hard to yourself! You’re such a beautiful and talented person. Sending you a big hug from Germany! Thank you for the wonderful patterns and videos!

[@redlantern3371]

I was going to comment, but after reading so many of these comments here, there is nothing I can say better. Such sweet, compassionate people here! Take the advice of those that match how you are feeling. I have a son too. Now 34. When he was a newborn, I cried for 3 months.... everytime he cried, I cried. I'm happy to tell you that when we are together now all we do is laugh. Laughing is alot more fun! But I wouldn't give up those first few months for anything, despite the stress and pressure. A big hug for you!

[@morganunraveled]

there is not enough discussion about how hard it is to be a stay at home WORKING mom (or dad). running a business from home while mothering is soo challenging. you and Juki are both working so hard and also parents now. it’s so tough! sending y’all both so much love.

[@andreeabelciu6081]

Oh!!! Look, I am 50 years old, with big kids, but seeing how you feel reminded me of my time as a new mum. Please, first of all, you are number one on the list. Very close, not as number 2 but as like a number 1.5 is baby. Try to do only the bare minimum for the house, believe me the dust will still be there when your baby is older. This time is busy and condensed and hard but it is so beautiful and essential for the little one. Hold him and be there for him with all your mind and heart. NOTHING ELSE MATTERS. I am sending you all my love and encouragements. You are enough and you are the best mother for him.

[@easternredbud]

Our generation relies on maintaining a maternal identity outside of motherhood - I think your approach is balanced. Do what you love! And you’re doing it.

[@julieenslin909]

Just a gentle reminder that post-partum depression is a real thing, that your doctor and community may be able to guide you out of. ❤ It helps to have others come alongside you with bit, though your experience of course is your own. ❤ sweet little Edwin! (My brother's name.) Thank you for sharing your process of book creation! I can't wait to see it...but then again, of course we can wait! Create it on your own timeline.

[@aplpi16]

❤ Hang in there, Kika. Go at your own pace, listen to your body, listen to your heart. Give yourself permission to take time for yourself and your family whenever you need. Thank you so much for sharing with such authenticity. You're my absolute favorite KZbin creator ❤😊

[@AnastasiaStingley]

I remember all the hormones and stress of being reactive to what the baby needs. I, too, felt very emotional, stressed and sleep deprived. The newborn stage is so hard, especially when you are working a lot. Getting more sleep and taking some time for yourself helps a lot. See if you have a friend or family member who can take the baby for an hour or two to give you a little time to nap, work, exercise or watch a movie to help you relax. The responsibility of being a mom changes as the kiddos get older, but you still worry and feel stressed. Good luck with your book and remember to take time for yourself to relax, exercise or nap - it will help you recharge.

[@veronicarar8227]

Hi, I recently discovered you chanel it was your wedding dress video and the next one I saw 👀 you had a baby. I decided to write today because I saw you crying and you remind me of myself 33 years ago. Mi first baby was 3 or 4 weeks old and I told my mom “if this is being a mom this baby will be a only child” and she told me “if this is what you think I am so disappointed “ . I would like to tell you what I would tell my daughter in the same situation. “ It is normal my sweet girl! You are tired, you body is still adjusting. I am surprised you can accomplish in the present situation” I would say this and more while I hug her” . Please give yourself a break Kika! Hugs from Mexico City

[@Onecutepoodle326]

Ah it will all work out. I learned unfortunately later on in life to not try to be the perfect , wife, mother, homemaker. Just do the best you can each day- take one day at a time. If you go to bed and the dishes are in the sink , house not straightened up , so be it. No awards are handed out for the cleanest home 😊. Plus asking for help is not failure. We all have been then. Sending you hugs. 🤗 You are not alone in your feelings.

[@WhiteLotusOm]

Oh Kika first thing you look absolutely radiant and second you just let it all out when you need to it’s just the baby blues and very very normal where you’ll have your good and not so good days. Retired 68yr old nurse here who had 4 children which included Triplets now all grown and I still remember the pressure I put on myself to do it all perfectly and quickly realized that was not healthy so I started to relax and face each day as it unfolded and took the time to rest when my babies slept, played with them more and let the house chores wait a little. Your hormones are all over the place after having a baby plus we are learning what on earth did we do with our time before bringing a little human into the world who now rules how our day unfolds. This was a very beautiful and heartfelt video and all so very normal, don’t try to fit it all into your day, take time to relax and rest with your baby as your body is still healing from the birth and it’s such a short time that they are this tiny and grow so very fast….thank you for sharing your beautiful life with us as a new Mum. Sending hugs your way! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

[@interpretermom]

You are adorable! I love your designs and I’m excited about the new book. Be gentle with yourself these days. It will get better as the days go by. You’re doing great. Every mom feels the same way, thinking they’re not keeping up. The baby was trying to tell you, it will be fine, mom!

[@chi554]

Girl you are amazing! You are an amazing mom, an amazing creator and an amazing knitter! The first year is the hardest and you are allowed to have all the emotions about it! I just got out of it and trust me forget the cleaning... as long as your house if safe is all that matters. You need a break, the housework will wait. You are allowed to have a "messy" house right now, it's ok!

[@8Gammie]

What a beautiful baby boy. I want to hug you and calm you... I understand the emotions, and trying to figure out how to go forward with so much change. It will happen and life will be become clock work on how it is now. Just love your video and your honesty. Praying for all, and so thankful for your beautiful video with gorgeous parts on your travels. Love,hugs,prayers until next time. YAY on book 2!!!

[@misha76]

As a parent of 2 teens, I can absolutely relate to what you are feeling as a new parent. It totally turns your world upside down and it can take some time to find your new balance. Give yourself and your partner lots of grace and patience, and take breaks for yourself on a regular basis. You are doing an awesome job of juggling parenting a newborn, being a homeowner, and writing ANOTHER book! (I've just cast on for one of your test knits, and I must say I am in love with this yarn! 😍) Just keep doing what you're doing, one step at a time and know that you've got lots of cheerleaders here on your KZbin channel rooting for you and your family!

[@rosellajohnson40]

Hey little lady, take a deep breath! Enjoy your little boy, the moments are so fleeting, and they won't come back again. If your dead lines have to be pushed back a little... well just breathe again. It will come. Just so very happy to see you and your family again. Many hugs.🙃

[@claudiamayumifuji5100]

Kika, I discovered your YT channel a month ago and I can´t stop watching. I´m from Brazil e it´s so nice to follow your journey sharing your knitting business, family and recently your pregnancy and motherhood process. Your natural way is captivating. You are the best mom that your baby could have because you´re doing your best as you can, even when you´re not feeling enough. And we´ll continue to admire your beautiful work knowing that now you have a little human being to love and take care.

[@tulpenballerina]

Oh Kika, I understand the problem that you feel torn between all the demands. You really have to leave tasks undone sometimes. Do you think Edvin will later say: "My childhood was so nice because it was tidy and clean at home!" No, the time with him is important! All the best, dear Kika. You can definitely do it!🐞🐞 perfection is only a question of perspective.🦋

[@maryarneson5815]

Yes you're blessed, yes you have a good life, yes you have.... but none of that negates that life is hard "having" does not mean life's daily pressures and the feeling you have to perform 100% 24/7 is any less. Set boundaries for yourself, talk to your mom about your feelings. If anyone can understand and empathize it's her. We all love you and we all want you to balance your pressure, you are not a performance monkey sweetheart, you are human, wonderful and so amazingly talented. Take a breath, have coffee with your mom even if it's on FaceTime. We will be here when you catch your breath. ❤❤❤❤

[@karalealynaeh.4500]

Hello Kika! Love seeing you back. Take life moment by moment. We r not meant to do all the things all the time. We all go through "seasons" in life. Your followers will be here for you. Sending love and prayers for you and your family.

[@barbarawatson1667]

…..thinking is overrated….one moment, one hour at a time. You only need to do what’s right in front of you. Let the thoughts go and be in the moment. And if you feel like crying, go for it. I so enjoy your vlogs, and baby Is a cutie. Life is brilliant and messy and exciting and fun and certainly difficult at times, but it’s the love and gratitude we hold in our hearts that moves us through it all. Many Blessings from Canada.

[@kathyihler7239]

Greetings from the USA. Hopefully you are settling in with your husband, baby, cats and yarn. I miss you and am looking forward to your new knitting book. I’ve made many of your patterns and love them! ❤️ and 💋 the baby for me. You are the best!

[@saltypottery]

You're doing great and what you're feeling is COMPLETELY normal, even if it doesn't feel that way! I went through the same thing as a working mom with a newborn baby 22 years ago and my husband was amazing (still is after 27 years) but at the end of the day, there just aren't enough hours in the day sometimes and the mom guilt is real. Just keep being you and the awesome woman you are! Now my boys are 19 and 22. They are so very proud of my accomplishments and saw how a strong, kick-butt working mom can achieve so much and still love them to pieces. You're setting a great example - remember that when you're feeling a little blue!

[@simsilonecreative1245]

Sometimes things/situations/circumstances come into our life and want us to focus on that a 100%, so the new situation becomes our "full time job". That is with sicknesses, care of people, moves, you name it. And it happens that these situations don't earn us money even though it is a full time job and that is when things can get difficult.

[@KnittingJoy]

Aww Kika, you speak the truth of so many new mums! Society so devalues the role of being a parent. Instead we're told that we have to keep working and keep the house pristine. Because being a parent is not enough. I, too, felt like I had to do it all, until I realised that the most important opportunity of all - the opportunity to enjoy my precious newborn - was passing me by. And I really would only get the opportunity to soak it all in once. Be kind to yourself and put your previous little family first. Babies are only tiny for such a short time! Loving the new projects and I'll still be here for your book and your new patterns when they're ready! 🧶🧶🧶💞

[@valentinagambetti167]

Hi Kika! I’m so happy to see you posting again! I just wanted to say that those first months of motherhood are sooo rough! Hopefully by now you’ve already started to experience it yourself, but it does get a lot better as little babies grow! Hang in there, I’m sure you’re doing amazing as a mom, you sure are as a creator! Looking forward to your next book!

[@lauriekimmelstiel2976]

I was the same way with baby #1 and on top of that I had had so many complications but by the time he was 5 months, things smoothed out and I could both enjoy him and relax etc. He is a beautiful baby. Savor the moments, embrace the craziness of new motherhood- it passes so quickly. Your videos are wonderful and so heartwarming. Your knits are exceptional. ❤

[@wilddogmountain6157]

Kika, you had baby and it will take 2years for everything to get back to "normal" with hormones your body recovering from baby. You are doing amazing and as a mum and I was a single mum for a while, I felt the same as you but it gets so much better and you are doing amazing! Be kind to yourself and patient to yourself and the new you as you settle into motherhood❤ I can't wait for your book and you are so inspirational 💕

[@rdaniceh-s7442]

Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing your handsome little man! It is so marvelous to see your little family again. You are such a good mother! Some of us in your audience have already shared in motherhood and love your new adventure, and especially your knitting skills. Have missed you here.

[@naddsn6374]

Kika, you keep on being relevant, no matter how much or less you are posting or presenting... you are a wonderful creative lady and a new mum, please be kind to yourself - we all will be, for sure! I just started knitting a few weeks ago and four days ago I bought your first book, your work inspires me and makes me keep going! Lots of love and peace to you and your young family from Germany! ❣

[@debrasusan73]

You are just the sweetest. I'm glad you shared your feelings. Sending big hugs. Having a baby changes. everything. I hope you will take a breather and not feel the pressure of producing and working outside of ALL it takes to raise a little baby! Please don't let this time pass because you will be stunned how fast it goes, and then he's off to school. You will have so much more time for other things at that time, but even before that when he's a little more independent. You can still do the things you love in the meantime. Just spend the time you want and need with that adorable human. That's the most important thing. ❤️ He needs you more than we do. 😘🥰 It's just impossible to keep up at the speed you were going with a new little one. And that's ok! ❤

[@TheCatlady63]

Your Hormones are up and down at the present time so be kind to yourself. Don't put too much on your shoulders stress is not good for you or Edwin. These early months are so precious dont let the pressures from your book over shadow your enjoyment of your baby. You can push the book 6 - 12 months and people would still love it. Edwin is a gem xx Take care of yourself. x

[@enjoyyourlife279]

You are doing fine and we always enjoy your stories, your beautiful knitting work, your home, your baby - everything. You are doing fine. Relax.

[@arlakaytay]

Bless your heart. I love your videos. I will wait until you make another. Edvin is adorable and such a joy. Hormones are beastly. What you are feeling is so normal. Exhaustion makes tears flow. You are an inspiration. I will soon be 65 and I stayed home with both my babies...you will never regret this time with him but never forget that you are allowed to do things you like and what you aspire to be and do. Keep up the good work, little mama, and cut yourself some slack!!

[@annaneel889]

Being a young mother and working is not easy. I think a mother feels more guilt than men. It's just the way we are. My son is almost 36 years old. I'd give anything to see him at two months. When you hear that with a baby time goes too fast that is so true. Enjoy the small sweet moments. The book and videos can wait! I watch lot's of knitting podcasts and you are my favorite. I'm so happy for you and your husband. Just breath and count your blessings and know that we have all been through the same things. We all love you. Mommy hugs from the USA

[@marletteclark3227]

Don’t worry about having to do KZbin videos for us. Take care of yourself and your family and your home first. We’ll wait for you. Also, can you hire someone to help clean your house? I promise to buy your book and help support you. I’m looking forward to the basic sweater patterns. Love you and your family. ❤

[@thekindles1183]

Always the hardest part of being a Mom is the balance and the guilt. It's hard too when you're tired. Hugs to you both. It's such an experience. I'm excited for your book! Can't wait to get it. All the best, Kimberly

[@gizmodog51]

Great to see you back. Don’t let things get you down. The way you are feeling is normal, and you need to accept that your life will be very different now. Take time for yourself and your precious baby. Things will get better and before you know it, he will be at school and you will wonder where all the time went. Let work take a back seat for a while and chill. ❤❤❤

[@juliart7574]

I've been eyeing that bright yellow sweater that sticks out of pile when Kika sits on her sofa talking at 18:00... I love everything yellow-bright green-orange and I would really love to see the designs that go with bright yellow color )))

[@Kristie.Jennings]

I have been a silent (non-commenting) watcher since you started making knitting videos. You are loved by all of us and we will wait for your videos, patterns, books, and anything else you share! Find the balance you need to continue your life journey and be happy with your husband and the new addition to your family. We all understand. You are now a part of "The Mother's Club" and we get it! Sending you hugs from Colorado. By the way, I am NOT a knitter and LOVE watching ALL your videos while I CROCHET! Our baby girl turned 15 years old a few weeks ago, too. 😄🧡🧡🧡🧡

[@RenataMalicka]

Hi Kika, I was almost 38 years old when I had the first child and I remember so much about the mixed emotions about the excitement of the new baby but also how paralysed I was that I lost all the freedom in my life. My girls are almost 11 and 9 now and I wish I was kinder to myself by that time. Also the kids grow so fast, so please enjoy the time you have with Edwin, becouse he will groww like in a minute. Of course you are also excited about your new book, but you can have many more in your life, but the time you have with Edwin as a baby is limited. Believe me!❤

[@FriendlyFibers]

I love how real you are! I want you to know that your people, us, we aren’t going anywhere! I’m a mother too, I have 3 daughters, 25, 20, and 16. It’s hard for sure but I promise you will figure it out! One day at a time. It’s okay to be a mom and a wife and a sister and a daughter and have a career. It’s also okay to ask for help when you need it or a hug. Thank you for sharing your real life with us. Sending you a hug from one mama to another ;)

[@chantald9661]

Remember to make YOURSELF happy too. As mothers we often put ourselves last and forget that we need some time for us too. It takes time to adjust and find a new normal. Hang in there ! 😊

[@morganunraveled]

absolutely crying with you. mine is two and I feel all the feelings with you. we are so creative and ambitious, always trying to do so much, while mothering. feeling like I’m never present enough but wanting to also keep the momentum going with what you have created. I go back and forth between just wanting to slow down & just be with him and wanting to “do it all”. there is a balance but it’s hard to find. such heavy, real, raw feelings. you are not alone in feeling this. the emotions and experiences of parenthood are so intense & a lot to navigate. thank you for sharing your vulnerability with us 🫶🏻

[@unplainjane123]

Taking care of a newborn has been THE hardest thing I’ve ever done. Your feelings are completely valid. If any consolation it does get way better : ) Do what you love. I think mom guilt is something all mothers deal with especially working moms. You’ve got this!

[@karenombler5629]

Kika we will all be here fof you when you are ready to come back, motherhood is a full time job...take it easy on yourself ❤

[@lulububu721]

Hi Kika!! I LOVE watching and listening to your videos, I love your knits so much,I wish I had the talent you have for knitting and designing, they are so beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing your life with us, baby Edwin is just perfect, such a blessing💜 enjoy your week Kika 🩷 🩷 Tina 🩷

[@katmahasti]

First, thank you for sharing what you're feeling regarding working, writing, being a Momma, spouse, and daughter. Sharing this will help so many other parents know they are not alone. And second, you are awesome! I find in Doula work that my clients frequently feel overwhelmed, during the postpartum period, which by the way does NOT end after 6 weeks. Take care of you! Be gentle with yourself. You just grew a WHOLE BABY and now you have this wonderful human being to love and nurture and that can be daunting as heck. As others have said enjoy that beautiful being. Time goes by so quickly. My kids are in their early 30s. I don't know how it happened so fast! We will wait patiently for your book, and any future videos. You need to learn how to be parents. It's quite the ride!

[@katesterling8915]

Time stopped 23:45. This is a typical feelings of being a mum. You love you child, you want to be there for them 100% but you run a business which you love & feel you need to fo that. You are a home maker with your husband & you've mentioned everything is a little untidy. This is so normal. No need to tidy, don't feel guilty of wanting to work, don't feel guilty about not wanting to work & be with baby. Be sleep deprived doesn't help. You'll get your routine & so will hubby & baby. It dies actually get better. You are doing so well, you look great & you've got this. , Give yourself time. You are lucky you have time & support around you. Sending hugs & high fives 🍼👏🤗🧶x will carryon watching now 😊

[@easternsecrecy9777]

Your baby boy is adorable. I just want to say that I have had three adorable baby boys and I understand completely how exhausted you are, how your hormones are adjusting, and how you have a million things going through your mind. It happens to all of us. I am sending you a cyber hug.

[@TheAligningSoul]

I soooo understand you Darling!! Juggling motherhood and work and life in general is really challenging and hard sometimes! You have my wholeheartedly sympathies ❤❤❤

[@sharonkennedy8612]

Don’t put so much pressure on yourself. I know that is easier said than done. It doesn’t matter if a woman stays home, goes to work, has their own business, we all struggle with our choices. I stayed home 7 years with my kids and then went back to work when my last child was 4. I had so much guilt about that decision, but we wanted a bigger house and we needed the money. It all worked out in the end. At the time we made the right decisions for our family. You are making the right choices for your family too. Some days are just harder than others. They are all married now and we are all really close. Congratulations on the new book, that’s exciting news. Love all your designs.

[@arianesmith9997]

Kika, I feel most Morher’s go through the emotions of trying to do it all and trying to find a balance. We think we need to have it all perfect or we aren’t being a good parent. So , don’t worry, do what feels right at the moment ( Edvin comes first), it will all work out in the end. Sending hugs

[@icebow2005]

When I saw that you posted I cheered. When you shared your emotions I just wanted to reach out and give you a hug. I remember those feelings!! When my 2nd child was born I had such intense anxiety. Thanks to my husband It passed quickly and I continued to work full time after an 8 wk break. In time my roles of wife, mom, and worker complemented each other. It looks like you may have that. Your knitted projects, the book, and your little angel were so wonderful to see/hear you talk about. Thank you for posting. (ps-don't forget to nap. You deserve it!!!!

[@ShariBoonzaayer]

When you talk to us about your struggles my heart goes out to you, every Mother feels those exact thoughts, the thing to remember is your child is living his best life with two loving parents and his needs taken care of, he dosent feel he is lacking so relax a bit and don’t be hard on yourself, you are a wonderful mother ♥️

[@lorrainewalker9426]

Anyone who has had a family will understand. you are amazing and sooo clever and creative. Enjoy the moments, little one is thriving and so lucky to have such fabulous parents. Housework and KZbin can wait, Good to see you . 💕❤️🧶xx

[@jenniferpackard6558]

As a mother of five incredible children and seven grandchildren, they are little such a short time, enjoy it as much as possible. What you are feeling is totally normal and in time you will figure it out. Be patient with yourself :)

[@helentkalcic4417]

Kika, do what fills your heart. When you address your needs, the needs of others are easier to fulfill and your happiness will spill over to those around you. It doesn’t mean to ignore others, but maybe think about quality of your time together instead of quantity. I went to work when my babies were less than 4 months old, and i am so proud of what they have grown into. I provided them with love and aspirations to succeed in life when they were younger, it has paid off.

[@Ophieknits]

Thank you for sharing your most vulnerable moments. I speak for myself but I know so many others will also still be here if you need to take some time. I appreciate your beautiful patterns so much, but I totally understand the pressure and overwhelm of being a working mom. Take time for yourself and don’t feel bad about it. Sending you love from Texas! ❤

[@JacobadeJager]

Hey Kika, It is not easy to be a mom. You have to get used to It. It takes time. Put yourself on number one so you can get used to be a mom. You love your son, the lovely one needs you But try to take some rest when your son is sleeping. And don‘t put yourself under so much pressure. When people are complaining your House is a mess, Show them the vacuum cleaner or the bucket to clean. You will see no one will. Breath in and out and love yourself. You are doing a great job.

[@creativian68]

Kika, we all love you, and I am sure we will continue to love your simple, timless and ageless (!) designs. Please don't burn yourself out. I worked as a freelance translator, doing quite nicely. However I had the same kind of fears as you (if I say no now, will they ever ask me again?). Kika, your cardigan tutorial helped me rediscover the joy of knitting and the pleasure of knitting something beautiful of a nice yarn. Thank you so much for showing me how easy it is to make something beautiful with my own hands.

[@elisabritton802]

You''re doing wonderful! Don't be too hard on yourself. Just enjoy that precious little one. I love this poem: "Cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow. For babies grow up we've learned to our sorrow. So, quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep. I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep." Just take one day at a time. it doesn't have to be perfect, just has to be done. Do your best, let God do the rest. God bless!

[@heidikarpa2278]

You’re a wonderful mother. ❤ Your willingness to share the vulnerable side of new motherhood warmed my heart and flooded my mind with memories. I look back at the first year of my daughter’s life and refer to it as mommy boot camp. It is SO hard. Our bodies are still healing, our minds still grasping at the new reality and every relationship in our lives changed. Forever without us really knowing in what way. You are navigating these waters really well. Cry when the tears are there to cry. Sleep every second you have a chance to. Every part of yourself and your creativity needs to sleep every second it’s possible. Laugh and love and focus on your new one whenever you can. The work will manage itself in some way. It always does. Your audience isn’t going anywhere. And your book is being birthed with your baby. It makes sense to me. Whenever possible, trust yourself and your heart. And remember you ARE a wonderful mother. Just as you are.

[@Rabidknitter]

My babies are all grown up and have left the nest 😂. Motherhood is an endless journey of growth and letting go, emotions that are all over a spectrum of the human experience. I always gained solace from crafting since it was so meditative and healing ❤. It was also helpful to talk with other moms and just hang out with and without the babies. Big hugs from the US 🎉

[@rosemaryedwards3293]

How exciting to bring out another knitting book - can't wait to see it! Edvin is gorgeous, and he will grow up so quickly, so make sure you take time for yourself and enjoy every minute of being with him. The problem is, when you are pregnant, everybody tells you that if you are feeling low, that it is your hormones playing up. What they don't tell you is that your hormones never go back to the way they were before pregnancy, so don't worry about feeling very emotional, and that things get too much sometimes - that is completely normal. Enjoy life as a family!

[@laurennegonzalez985]

Dearest Kika! The most important is you! Work will always be there, part it’s not to get anxious over schedule’s! Rest well and eat well, knit and enjoyed the things you love . The times goes so fast but it’s goes faster with family! I just finish two Arctic Light sweaters ! Your designs are so gorgeous! Thank you for taking the time to You tube! 😊 as motherhood comes , what we do know as long as baby, have dry nappy, belly full and with mama and papa ! Where ever your feet will bring you and your knitting hand will produce! He will be a happy baby, because mommy do what she love best! I really look forward for your knitting book! Thank you , you have made my retirement special knitting a joy! ❤ 🇨🇦

[@grettastephens1583]

Thank you so much for sharing the reality of new parenthood. We don’t see enough of this in the public sphere which is part of the reason new parents feel under so much pressure.

[@zetsubou1960]

That's what it's like being a parent! All your wants and needs take the back seat, baby comes first! I was so confused for a long time when I had my first child. I missed my own time and hobbies, felt so guilty and stressed out. It will get easier in time but you should not try to do EVERYTHING! Let something be and enjoy your little bundel of joy (and poop ;). You have made a big 'name' of yourself in the knitting world already! You can be proud of yourself! Take care and take it easy 💜

[@christybray8789]

Crying is a great emotional release, so don’t feel bad about that! And give yourself lots of grace. Nobody’s gonna care if your house is a little dirtier than it used to be - just gonna have to let some things go. All those list you put in to do can be prioritized and they just might not all get finished! And that is a OK. Can’t wait for your new knitting book because I love the first one. And I really love all of your creations. Your sweaters are the ones that my children tell me they would like to have for themselves! These are grown children ages 27 and 29 😊

[@sewme1468]

your content is timeless. i will definitely buy your book whenever it is out. and i will watch your videos whenever you put them up. and i am willing to wait for a year, so that you can actually have time to care for your baby. you are allowed to take a break and then come back witb more energy.

[@TrudySchwartzBurrill]

Its good to let your emotions flow. You wil” always feel guilt over time with your children and time when we must work. Parenting is hard but extremely ',rewarding work. As is knitting and love. So enjoy all of them everything will be fine. Congratulations on your new book.

[@penjelly88]

You're doing a great job ❤ his little baby gurgles are so happy and chatty. Being a mum is so hard and there is no right answer - other than let yourself cry when the tears come. Much love from NZ.

[@annies2416]

Congratulations on your beautiful baby boy and your new book. No one tells expectant moms how difficult some days or weeks can be after your precious baby arrives. And those hormones!!!😱 Know that Edvin thinks you are the best, smartest, most wonderful mom in the world, even if you don’t feel it or believe it. Hugs to you! You’ve got this!💕

[@gayleyip6689]

Thank you for sharing your ups and downs. Remember to be kind to yourself. You are doing well as a mom and as a creative woman ❤.

[@sfilcowana]

You are such an inspiration for all of us! Thank you for making the time to create these videos.I really appreciate it, although no one would blame you if you took a break. What I can’t imagine is having a 3-4 month old baby and both parents working full time. Thinking of giving birth and then not being able be with my baby for 9 hours a day scares me to death.I don’t know how people do THAT.

[@hanna2973]

Caring for a newborn is the hardest thing I have ever done. I was the first of my friends to have a baby, and I had no one to talk to about my struggles. I felt so guilty that I didn't feel euphoric love for my son 100% of the time - sometimes I just wanted to be alone, the weight of this little person was just too much. It's an impossible standard! Don't feel bad if you ever need time away to remember that you're still YOU - not just a mother, but so much more. My son is 1.5 years now, a lovable toddler, and each new phase is better and better. We're reading together, running through the house, having tickle fights - and we are relaxed and well rested! The emotions of your first child will take some time to settle, but before you realize, the sleepless nights and anxiety will be lifted and you'll start having much more fun. All my best to you and your family. This time is yours, spend it how you want and don't put too much pressure on yourself. If you need time away, take it - you will be a better, more present mother for it, and eventually you will come out the other side. We're rooting for you! ❤

[@CathyHume-r3u]

Don’t be so hard on yourself. Just relax and enjoy your baby. Housework is always there what doesn’t get done is not important. 💕

[@antoniachica1956]

Hi Kika, you are doing a fabulous job with all things going on in your life! You have post partum blues and it is ok to feel the way you do! Let it out and keep on going; it will pass!! Best of luck with everything ❤ I know you are taking great care of your family, but DO take careofyourself❤Lots of love and a big 🤗

[@xiomarastabacksmith1908]

My darling, enjoy every minute of the fortune of having a healthy and beautiful baby and new life! This is a big transition and you will get over the anxious feelings with all the smiles you get from your baby!

[@chickadeeacres3864]

It’s all the newness, routine changes, extra pressures, but it’s nothing we can’t handle. It’s the hormones. Hang in there. Just don’t make any major decisions when feeling this way. You’ll be fine, and it’s lovely to see you all so happy and doing your best.

[@braidsecrets6952]

My Mom gave me the best advice...Sleep when the baby sleeps! The housework can wait and your rest is more important. Motherhood is wonderful , yet hard. You're doing great!

[@laurineeng]

It’s totally normal to have these emotions, don’t ignore them… keep letting them out. Things will get better with time 🌺🌸💕💕💕