Learning to Say NO

If you want to make room to invest in what matters most in your life, you will have to learn to say NO. In fact, healthy people have learned to say NO and say it a lot.
Practicing saying NO helps you get clear on what your YES is. But in order to experience this, we have to deal with some issues in our lives that keep us from saying a healthy NO.
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Disclaimer: The content published is for informational purposes. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition. Never disregard professional advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read in our material.
The resources given are not designed to practice medicine or give professional medical advice, including, without limitation, medical direction concerning someone's medical and mental health. Any resources given are not to be considered complete and does not cover all issues related to mental and physical health. In addition, any information given should not replace consultation with your doctor or any other mental health providers and/or specialists.

[@ladyesther]

I'm saying a whole-hearted YES to saying No! YES!

[@mistyflores3176]

Learning this everyday! As a matter of fact told my sister I couldn't do something that required me to juggle a lot of things pertaining to my children. She got upset. I'm not sorry for that NO. Ty for the encouragement brother! 💙

[@KatiannaMom]

This is so helpful as a leader of a church and healing prayer ministry, there are constant demands and my compassionate heart gets pulled. But boundaries are helpful

[@natalieann2000]

This is such a good word. I have approval addiction

[@discoveringidentity.7090]

I have some tips for helping overcome people pleasing and fear of setting boundaries. 1. Write a list of all your fears regarding boundaries for example “ I fear others will be angry at me” rate them 1-10 as how intense it is 2. Write the opposite or find a neutral belief such as “others will be understanding and compassionate” and look for 5-10 examples of where you have said no or XYZ and how people were actually understanding. Because not everyone is going to be upset with you. 3. Set one small boundary a day like today I’m going to a restaurant and I’m going to spend xyz money only. Tell yourself why setting this boundary is good healthy and how it will benefit you 4. If worse comes to worse and say someone is upset with you tell yourself why you’ll be okay if this happens and do hinge to support yourself like encouraging yourself and how brave you are or maybe calling a friend for support or even buying yourself a treat to be kind to yourself and train yourself to see that saying no isn’t a negative things it’s more neutral. Hope that helps !

[@learningpeace9788]

Spot on! My struggle with this first began in childhood for sure. As a kid, standing up for myself, saying "no" or setting normal personal boundaries to my narcissistic father immediately meant more punishment and bullying. I can still hear his voice saying, "What do you mean, No?" "How dare you tell me No!" "Who do you think you are?..." ect. And I say boldly to those old interpreter voices, "I'm a child of God! That's who I am!" 😊

[@jessicalove143]

This was very helpful. What stood out to me was when you mentioned people who say “I don’t know what I want”. I am currently on the healing journey (for life 😅)! What are some suggestions/steps you’d recommend one could take to help assemble a new healthy vision/goals? I appreciate the video’s and help! May your rewards continue to be stored up in heaven 🙏🏽

[@taylorplayer50]

So helpful, thank you Mark. After having a meltdown several years ago, I'm learning what to say NO to.

[@tanvigawde1612]

You hit the nail! Thank you!

[@ZezimaMills]

Tough love compels a “no” sometimes. Good words,Sir!

[@jennamartin5913]

I would just like to say you’re an awesome brother from another mother!

[@maryteplova437]

Thank you so much, Mark! It has become harder to cope with OCD during the war in my country. Some addictions have joined to it to deal with fear, anxiety, loneliness, feeling of unprotection (when your beloved ones are so far away). I became so vulnerable that even had dated with an unbeliever because I felt better when someone who 'cares' was by my side day by day. Sometimes it becomes a nightmare. But in the meantime I have never craved for Christ in my life like this I think, and has become more serious in showing the love of Christ to my fellow citizens, especially ones who have been suffering much more than me.

[@pagen5219]

HUGS

[@ladytemjad]

This was so gooooooodddddddd❤❤ Thank you!!!

[@gr-eg3ld]

"Heaven yes, hell no" Love it

[@its_ermann]

always so encouraging, these kind of videos enhance my faith

[@rockerune]

This is so helpful. Having learned that I need to performed or be someone is an issuse, but in Jesus name Im an overcommer. The funny thing is that I really respect when someone says no. Guess its about not having learnd to have a mature love for myself

[@alexandriacollins7488]

You bring up some amazing points! I love the lists idea I’m definitely gonna do that🤔I’m trying to improve at setting boundaries and sticking to them & I’m so glad I came across this vid. I had a friend who would guilt me & push my boundaries & I would give in sometimes, but thankfully I came to my senses and let go of that friendship. God was telling me to cut ties w/ her and I’m glad God gave me the courage to do so.

[@bcars4759]

Great stuff, Mark! Thank you!

[@micahbgood]

LIGHTBULB!!!💡

[@morganmerrill6905]

Thank you

[@MrMarc315]

My problem of with me learning to say no is something I worry about making a bad choice or being judged by others including family and friends

[@DanaL-u3e]

i just wanted to say; i thoroughly enjoy watching your videos; i started to follow your youtube channel back during sometime ago in the summer. this one is one of my favorites so far : ). keep on doing those awesome videos here on youtube mark : ) this made me think of a loved one from my church in which she's more likely just an acquaintance to me; in my personal opinion, i litterarly need to show her this video; not be mean or anything but in my personal opinion she is one of those ones that doesn't take no for an answer and i do. one night back in summer of 2016 had a friend of mine stay with me for a whole week while i was house sitting while my parents were gone out of town; the last day which was that same day my parents were heading home later that night; i had to text my friend something after a funeral she had to go to; i was having my friend take me to this store i had to get something this shop was holding for me then wanted to do that then for the 2 of us to get something to eat then drop me back off at my parents house were i was house sitting; instead of hearing back from her directly on her cellphone; this acquaintance of mine is actually a friend of my friend i just mention; this acquaintance had my friends phone at the time that night they were on the way back from a funeral; at first i thought it was my friend the fact i was texting to see if she could drop the one thats my acquaintance and my friends mom back to their homes then swing by my parents house to pick me up so i could go to this shop were they were holding something for me then grab a bite to eat afterwards; this acquaintance refused to listen and respect my wish that night all this was going on; it was like she wanted to take control of the situation and take matters into her own hands by making the evening all about her; i got frustrated with her but tried to keep my cool that night once i got into my friends car that had my acquaintance from my church alongside my friends mom; that night when all this was going on, i'm in a sense glad i chose to keep my cool and not raise my voice and start yelling at this acquaintance of mine while in the car with my friend and my friends mom but since after each year up to this point during the summer for a whole week house sit my parents house while their gone on vacation; i have my friend stay over with me but on the negative side of the situation its like this acquaintance of mine which is a friend of that friend i just mentioned; its like this acquaintance of mine its like she thinks and believes she can invite herself over when this friend of mine is over with me for a whole week while my parents are gone out of town; its like i'm at the point don't know what else to do or say to this acquaintance of mine but starting to realize its a sign of narcissism this acquaintance of mine is pulling with me. i've tried to get myself to go to a physologiest that specializes in narcissism after the fact she's been told off and on since that summer of 2016 up to this point. its like all i've been wanting is just to get advice from a physcologiest that specializes in narcissism to help me fully explain to this acquaintance of mine doing it only out of love to her but at the same time respecting me as a person respect my wishes the fact she and i aren't actually friends. keep me in your prayers on asking the lord what exactly i should do to stop this from happening to me : ) GOD BLESS!!!!! : )

[@rckc.1719]

again Mark 🏈💯💯💯💯 let your yea be yea and your nay be nay i wish i could have said NO more often especially as being a Christiaan i could have avoided so much pain.