So in summary, the search for El Dorado was: 10% gold 90% painful, agonizing failure
@antidote80835 жыл бұрын
And %100 reason to remember the name
@Wolfeson285 жыл бұрын
They fell off the wrong side of that particular razor's edge.
@bignoob58385 жыл бұрын
and 60% platinum that they threw into the ocean
@tomboyjessie13525 жыл бұрын
I recognize that Movie quote.
@clockworkkirlia74755 жыл бұрын
Also murder! Don't forget the murder!
@HackerWarrior845 жыл бұрын
"It really is the map to El Dorado!" "...You drank the sea water, didn't you?"
@joshuamcclung83625 жыл бұрын
(Starts slicing up a bunch of vines) of the trail... that we blaze! ( vines fall, revealing rock wall) (points to the left) That trail that we blaze!
@Emilie13love5 жыл бұрын
You kept the map, but you couldn’t grab a little more FOOD?!
@Moszan5 жыл бұрын
Oh, come on! I'm not coming on! I wouldn't set foot in that jungle for a million pesetas!
@warrirornunluv8015 жыл бұрын
The horse is a surprise
@zilesis15 жыл бұрын
You're not a God!? You lied to me?
@jamesbiggs83975 жыл бұрын
"What would YOU do with a time machine?" Go get all the platinum the Spaniards wasted.
@Janoha174 жыл бұрын
Bring a big net or bucket to catch it once it's under.
@_fawkes4 жыл бұрын
They would have probably paid with gold to get rid of them too.
@granmastersword4 жыл бұрын
Or catch the group in charge of throwing it to get it before that happens
@thatbluegamet4 жыл бұрын
Let me join in
@acebalistic13584 жыл бұрын
@@Janoha17 nah just go up to the guy dragging the cart, tell him to give it, if he dosen't shoot him with a machine gun. problem solved!
@MeliesCinemagician3 жыл бұрын
Just imagine if El Dorado was real and the Spanish had actually found it. "Yeah, this genuine city of gold is great and all, but... is there a place where we can get EVEN MORE gold?"
@thomasfoster43702 жыл бұрын
mammon!!! here, have a lozenge. all this whispering in mortal ears can't be doing wonders for your throat.
@misteraskman3668 Жыл бұрын
¡EL DORADÍSIMO!
@SewardWriter Жыл бұрын
@@misteraskman3668Where the cats shed pure gold, the drunks barf it, and cancerous tumours of gold are genuinely becoming a problem.
@iceluvndiva2110 ай бұрын
Geez it's almost like this place is deeply sacred and f**king with it is just asking for trouble!
@leobastian_10 ай бұрын
i mean that is what happened. the current standard for el dorado is like that because everything less gold filled had been found
@Bored_Dionysus5 жыл бұрын
Friendship and gold?.... “Both? Both?” Both is good.”
@seelcudoom15 жыл бұрын
well if they werent dicks to the natives they could have been friends with a golden man
@arcanefury36665 жыл бұрын
@@seelcudoom1 I'm 80% sure this is a reference to The Road to El Dorado
@seelcudoom15 жыл бұрын
@@arcanefury3666 im aware, im just pointing out how it could have literally been both in one person
@almostideal13065 жыл бұрын
Why not have a friendship with gold? Two birds, one stone.
@SharowbladyeGaymerPorate5 жыл бұрын
Platinum
@startrekker45965 жыл бұрын
Lake Guatavita, 1545: “Remember, don’t play yourself.” Lake Guatavita, 1580: “Don’t play yourself.” Lake Guatavita, 1898: “Congratulations, you played yourself.”
@Revenante_of_Asylum5 жыл бұрын
Moral of the story: The real treasure was the friends they made (and maimed) along the way. ...That, and the platinum they dumped into the ocean.
@spectreagent005 жыл бұрын
lol
@thatbluegamet5 жыл бұрын
To me it’s really painful but funny at the same time I wonder if anyone has colected it
@cybernubmaster9884 жыл бұрын
Star Platinum- I'm sorry I had to
@Lh00004 жыл бұрын
Sadly we don’t even know where they dumped that platinum. Fucking colonial Spain...
@Tenshi6Tantou6Rei4 жыл бұрын
@@Lh0000 to be fair, even if we knew, getting it back would be next to impossible
@orhankocak92794 жыл бұрын
*Audience:* "this story isn't realistic humans aren't that greedy or stupid" *Real life:* "IT'S NOT YELLOW IT'S USELESS!"
@mistymoooooor4 жыл бұрын
*American national anthem plays*
@pseudonym13374 жыл бұрын
This video is overly harsh on the Spanish and here is why: Taken from Wikipedia: "Of the 218 tonnes of platinum sold in 2014, 98 tonnes were used for vehicle emissions control devices (45%), 74.7 tonnes for jewelry (34%), 20.0 tonnes for chemical production and petroleum refining (9.2%), and 5.85 tonnes for electrical applications such as hard disk drives (2.7%). The remaining 28.9 tonnes went to various other minor applications, such as medicine and biomedicine, glassmaking equipment, investment, electrodes, anticancer drugs, oxygen sensors, spark plugs and turbine engines" As we all know, the Spanish Empire was a major consumer of automobiles, petroleum, computers, and cancer treatments. sarcasm The only use on this list they would have for Platinum is jewelry- which, hey, is based on the same totally subjective value people give to gold because it is yellow and shiny. So put yourself in the mind of a Spanish person c. 1600 AD- you don't know what a catalytic converter is, you have no idea how valuable Platinum will be to people 400 years after you die, indeed, you don't even know what it is. Furthermore, the native Platinum they were coming across in the Americas was not pure Platinum- it was mixed with silver, gold, and the other undiscovered Platinum group elements- so it didn't even show any of the unique properties of Platinum, and really wasn't "Platinum" anyway. That is why took so long to identify Platinum- Spanish chemists had to take great pains to actually isolate the pure metal itself, and note that they had to do this without any knowledge of what the pure form would be like, so it was a very difficult undertaking. Platinum was utterly worthless to the Spanish- as you can see, they didn't even have pure Platinum, and didn't have any use for it. The Platinum alloy they were finding was a brittle pale metal contaminated with Silver. Guess what? The banks of Europe in the 17th century did not accept that as a currency! And since arbitrary shiny value is the only possible use for elemental Platinum in the 17th century besides maybe as an alchemist or chemist's plaything, Platinum was pretty much worthless to the Spanish for good reason- especially when compared to GOLD- it was gold that filled the coffers of the Spanish king to defend his new empire from constant attack from the English, Dutch, and others, Gold that financed the constant wars Spain was embroiled in in Germany and the Low Countries, Gold that everybody else in Europe was using as a currency to pay for everything they needed- in this situation how are the Spanish ignorant or stupid for discarding an impure silvery metal that could easily be used on account of its heavy weight to counterfeit and invalidate gold currency and pursuing Gold, the actual thing that was necessary for their situation?
@fernandozavaletabustos2053 жыл бұрын
Pikachu?
@wellthismachinekills38093 жыл бұрын
Machu pichu ?
@flamethekid3 жыл бұрын
strange thing is, alot of things we see in movies that we dismiss as stupid behavior tends to be actual behavior humans tend to do in similar situations.
@maniacmagge25685 жыл бұрын
The conquistadors were literally "Perhaps the true reward is our found friendship?" "NO I WANT MY GOLD GOD DAMNIT"
@strangent404a75 жыл бұрын
I REQUIRE THE STAR METAL
@demonminer80935 жыл бұрын
@@strangent404a7 G I V E M E T H E B U T T E R Y S T O N E
@SharowbladyeGaymerPorate5 жыл бұрын
Platuim
@PeterDivine5 жыл бұрын
"Yeah, well it better not be a conceptual treasure at the end of this. 'Friendship' or some shit." "No way, I can honestly say I've always hated you guys"
@JohnnyElRed5 жыл бұрын
That I can think of, the only region we went in search of gold, and left with friendship, is the Phillipines. The rest of countries that were Spanish colonies hated our guts for a time, and some even still do today. But in the Phillipines, they seem to like us alright. Maybe the fact that just after us the United Statians came has something to do with it. "Luego vendrá, el que bueno me hará."
@alexgroundland9365 жыл бұрын
So what you're saying is... there's an untapped supply of platinum at the bottom of the sea around the coast of Spain? Perhaps it is still there to collect! Onwards friends, let us find El Platino!
@recordstore22655 жыл бұрын
Spain found a trunk of gold from that genocide age
@christophersutterlin69455 жыл бұрын
Ah shit, here we go again
@SnipahBarret50Cal5 жыл бұрын
For Platinum, Piety and Preeminence
@dbzfanexwarbrady5 жыл бұрын
and if we dont find it , we can just enslave the spanish
@greennikexful5 жыл бұрын
Brady 🤦🏻♀️ *oof*
@RealmRabbit5 жыл бұрын
"Anyway its been a protected site since 1965 so don't go getting any ideas." *Puts down maps and diving equipment.*
@nothingunderthemask4 жыл бұрын
*picks it up dressed like a robber*
@caseybeaudoin4 жыл бұрын
@Leviathan ORRRRRRRRR ITS SO CRAZY IT JUST MIGHT WORK
@severalpigeons69464 жыл бұрын
@Leviathan just put a bucket on the guards head and they won't stop you trust me I learned it from skyrim
@davisdelp81313 жыл бұрын
The gold is a gold as mine
@wonderlilane37243 жыл бұрын
Don't put it down yet! The platinum the conquistadors threw into the ocean is still down there somewhere!
@cheezemonkeyeater3 жыл бұрын
"Desperate to get rid of (the conquistadors) and sending them off on a wild goose chase." The most hilarious reference to this is in the original DuckTales, where one obsessive conquistador named Joaquin Slowly (yes, it's a terrible pun) was so convinced that El Dorado was real that he kept on searching after everyone else gave up. The natives kept telling him it was somewhere to the north until he eventually ended up at the North Pole, where he conquered and enslaved a tribe of penguins to help him continue the search, because IT HAD TO BE SOMEWHERE, DAMMIT!
@videogollumer2 жыл бұрын
Okay, I'm sorry, but you got a WHOLE lot of things wrong. 1. It was called the Valley of the Golden Suns, not El Dorado. 2. It wasn't Joaquin; it was his ancestor, Marcheen Slowly. 3. Marcheen was part of a crew that FOUND and stole a bunch of gold from the Valley of the Golden Suns but was left behind with only a single Sun Coin and his shipmate, Juan Tanamera. They then drew up a map to where the valley was, tore it in two, and each took a half before parting ways. 4. Marcheen enslaved a cliff dwelling sun worshiping tribe of natives somewhere in South America, who revered him because he had the Sun Coin. 5. It was Juan who managed to leave South America; and he ended up lost at sea near the SOUTH pole, not the North. Penguins don't live at the North Pole. 6. The Penguins only found Juan's half of the map and kept it in their museum of colors, which they value because there's not that much color in the desolate white expanse of Antartica. 7. It was El Capitan, the captain of the crew that stole the treasure from the valley, who was obsessed with, at first, finding his ship, which had the treasure and was lost in Ronguay. In the modern day, after he and Glomgold confronted Scrooge over the ship only for it to be sunk over a deep trench, El Capitan sought to return to the Valley of the Golden Suns for the rest of the gold. How did he stay alive for more than four centuries? He claims that it was sheer willpower (yeah, it's a load of shlock explanation even by the standards of fiction). 8. Joaquin seemed more so interested in ruling over the natives whose ancestors were enslaved by his ancestor, although he DID double-cross Scrooge after trading his half of the map for a Sun Coin that Scrooge obtained from the ship by sending the natives after Scrooge.
@cheezemonkeyeater2 жыл бұрын
@@videogollumer The pieces were all there, but they shifted in storage a bit.
@videogollumer2 жыл бұрын
@@cheezemonkeyeater Yeah, I think we all know that feeling.
@ravensflockmate Жыл бұрын
🤓🤓🤓
@Jonaegh Жыл бұрын
@@ravensflockmatelukewarm IQ
@timothymclean5 жыл бұрын
"While Atlantis has the narrative downside of being, at minimum, under five million tons of freezing saltwater, El Dorado is the kind of ancient lost city that has _zero_ drawbacks." Aside from being in the middle of a sweltering jungle full of jaguars, snakes, and imported malaria.
@alexemy24635 жыл бұрын
Timothy McLean maybe you’d have skilled, cooperative guides to help you if you hadn’t already gone and murdered everyone
@boobah56435 жыл бұрын
Well, I'd always heard the version that puts it somewhere in the most treacherous mountains in the New World, which isn't particularly better. Aside from less malaria, I guess.
@alexemy24635 жыл бұрын
Boo Bah A) point still applies, partly even more so bc you’d need better guides in a more remote place. B) it only started being in the most remote place to explain why they hadn’t found it after pillaging all the accessible places
@b3rz3rk3r95 жыл бұрын
And parasitic flies.
@alexemy24635 жыл бұрын
Starman Gaming you’d probably have doctors who knew how to remove and/or repel them safely if you hadn’t already gone and murdered everyone
@MURPHYCHACHO5 жыл бұрын
The real treasure was the animated movie we got out of it.
@EmmaAppleBerry5 жыл бұрын
Amen to that
@dogocatostudios87195 жыл бұрын
THE ROAD TO EL DORADO~!
@em55225 жыл бұрын
The songs were just golden
@Drocksas5 жыл бұрын
I low-key still remember almost all the words to "It's Tough to be a God."
@Emperor_Oshron5 жыл бұрын
@@em5522 the EVERYTHING was golden :D
@Gala-yp8nx5 жыл бұрын
Conquistadors: “GOLD!!!” Platinum: “Am I a joke to you?”
@robertdicke72495 жыл бұрын
@@Chad_Eldridge : No. Please. Stop. No. Please. Stop. Overused. Joke. Me. No. Likey. Joke: Am a joke to y... oh wait, yeah.
@robertdicke72495 жыл бұрын
@@Chad_Eldridge That while only using 1% of my power... i.pinimg.com/originals/f1/b5/94/f1b59472578e26f81dc42b8586b3c598.jpg
@Minaainthere5 жыл бұрын
Conquistadors: FUCK IS THIS UNCOOKED SILVER?!? Me: please say sike
@tomimakirinne5 жыл бұрын
Star Platinum: "You wanna get ora'd? Because this how you get ora'd."
@Penguinmanereikel5 жыл бұрын
Carter Kinoy apparently!
@heck_n_degenerate9403 жыл бұрын
Natives: *dumps gold in a lake for sacred rituals* Spain: “Ha, what idiots, they don’t even realize the value of their own treasure!” … “Now let’s dump this useless platinum in the Ocean so those darn counterfeiters will never get to it again.”
@amritpalkaur3188 Жыл бұрын
It's poetic
@iceluvndiva21 Жыл бұрын
Iiiiirooonnyyyyyy!~
@towelclipz Жыл бұрын
@@iceluvndiva21Well, more like platinum-y or gold-y in this case
@longshot9757 Жыл бұрын
@@towelclipz * rimshot *
@concept5631 Жыл бұрын
Spain deserved to lose their empire if (among *_MANY_* other things) they threw away Platinum of all things.
@Limrasson5 жыл бұрын
>Conquistadors find city entirely made of platinum. >Also conquistadors: "MEEEEH"
@fernandozavaletabustos2053 жыл бұрын
Star Platinum is not amused.
@ChimeraMK3 жыл бұрын
@@fernandozavaletabustos205 I am now picturing a city of colorful buff dudes who only communicate by punching each other and yelling ORA ORA ORA.
@AlL-tk6kw3 жыл бұрын
@@ChimeraMK you literally described the pillar men
@ChimeraMK3 жыл бұрын
@@AlL-tk6kw Nah, the Pillar Men communicate through poses. Star Platinum communicates with punches.
@eusuffezzhariefelizany57323 жыл бұрын
@@ChimeraMK MENACIMG POSES
@cjdragonessheart3165 жыл бұрын
"GEE IT'S ALMOST LIKE THIS PLACE IS DEEPLY SACRED SOMEHOW AND F*KING WITH IT IS ASKING FOR TROUBLE"
@timvanrijn82395 жыл бұрын
I mean not real you could have done a lot with it for like scholarship
@camramaster5 жыл бұрын
That just means we have to try harder.... The 'Murica Way!
@VineFynn5 жыл бұрын
Just superstition.
@hayakueon32305 жыл бұрын
@@VineFynn Wow, you must be fucking fun to be friends with.
@BlackEpyon5 жыл бұрын
The gods smite you for hiring a sapper to drain your lake instead of an engineer.
@alchemist4evr5 жыл бұрын
"We find the city of gold. We TAKE the gold. THEN we go back to Spain." "AND BUY SPAIN"
@recordstore22655 жыл бұрын
México invade spain
@mattbenz995 жыл бұрын
Hyperinflation intensifies. The Spanish have never been good at economics. Even today they are bad at it.
@chrismain74725 жыл бұрын
Yeah! That's the spirit!
@timvanrijn82395 жыл бұрын
@@recordstore2265 dude they have 2 revolutions more before they invade
@Cnut_the_grape5 жыл бұрын
The comeback.
@frostyguy19894 жыл бұрын
I see El Dorado as an allegory for Spain's own self-destruction. It was a kingdom that had everything: A powerful military, colonies rich beyond imagination, a leading role in Europe, a vibrant culture; it was the world's first true superpower. But it wasn't enough, it could not be enough, there would never be enough to sate its greed.
@pseudonym13374 жыл бұрын
This video is overly harsh on the Spanish and here is why: Taken from Wikipedia: "Of the 218 tonnes of platinum sold in 2014, 98 tonnes were used for vehicle emissions control devices (45%), 74.7 tonnes for jewelry (34%), 20.0 tonnes for chemical production and petroleum refining (9.2%), and 5.85 tonnes for electrical applications such as hard disk drives (2.7%). The remaining 28.9 tonnes went to various other minor applications, such as medicine and biomedicine, glassmaking equipment, investment, electrodes, anticancer drugs, oxygen sensors, spark plugs and turbine engines" As we all know, the Spanish Empire was a major consumer of automobiles, petroleum, computers, and cancer treatments. sarcasm The only use on this list they would have for Platinum is jewelry- which, hey, is based on the same totally subjective value people give to gold because it is yellow and shiny. So put yourself in the mind of a Spanish person c. 1600 AD- you don't know what a catalytic converter is, you have no idea how valuable Platinum will be to people 400 years after you die, indeed, you don't even know what it is. Furthermore, the native Platinum they were coming across in the Americas was not pure Platinum- it was mixed with silver, gold, and the other undiscovered Platinum group elements- so it didn't even show any of the unique properties of Platinum, and really wasn't "Platinum" anyway. That is why took so long to identify Platinum- Spanish chemists had to take great pains to actually isolate the pure metal itself, and note that they had to do this without any knowledge of what the pure form would be like, so it was a very difficult undertaking. Platinum was utterly worthless to the Spanish- as you can see, they didn't even have pure Platinum, and didn't have any use for it. The Platinum alloy they were finding was a brittle pale metal contaminated with Silver. Guess what? The banks of Europe in the 17th century did not accept that as a currency! And since arbitrary shiny value is the only possible use for elemental Platinum in the 17th century besides maybe as an alchemist or chemist's plaything, Platinum was pretty much worthless to the Spanish for good reason- especially when compared to GOLD- it was gold that filled the coffers of the Spanish king to defend his new empire from constant attack from the English, Dutch, and others, Gold that financed the constant wars Spain was embroiled in in Germany and the Low Countries, Gold that everybody else in Europe was using as a currency to pay for everything they needed- in this situation how are the Spanish ignorant or stupid for discarding an impure silvery metal that could easily be used on account of its heavy weight to counterfeit and invalidate gold currency and pursuing Gold, the actual thing that was necessary for their situation?
@fede98k543 жыл бұрын
Unfortunate that in reality, Spain spent most of this wealth in fighting endless wars against a pretty much united European front intent on preventing Hapsburg supremacy - Yes I still blame the Habsburg for the decline of Spain.
@Doublemonk05062 жыл бұрын
@@pseudonym1337, but unripe silver should eventually become ripe. Wasn't alchemy a thing back then as well
@Bewegungskrieg2 жыл бұрын
What’s funny is there probably were cities of metaphorical gold (cool ass ancient shit) that were just buried deep in the jungle. What’s even funnier is that maybe some of these sites were skipped over by certain treasure hunters because they weren’t shiny.
@dc-doblajecosteno27342 жыл бұрын
@@pseudonym1337 Tienes la boca llena de razón pero bueno es normal que se crean estás propagandas.
@danyramos81395 жыл бұрын
What I love about the Juan Martinez name is that in Spain it is a combination of the most common names in Spanish, like a “John Smith”. So they literally made a justification of a false legend and they put the most fake name on it.
@misteraskman3668 Жыл бұрын
Guy "John Johnson" Fawkes would be proud of that inventiveness
@gratuitouslurking8610 Жыл бұрын
@@misteraskman3668 Ah yes, proprietor of 'place', 'city'
@JBGR111 Жыл бұрын
@@gratuitouslurking8610Doer of ‘job’ at ‘place’
@metarcee2483 Жыл бұрын
I had a classmate named Juan Martinez a few semesters ago. I almost asked him if that was his real name.
@foldabotZ Жыл бұрын
“Juan” is also literally the Spanish version of “John” so that checks out.
@alexemy24635 жыл бұрын
“Señor, we’ve pillaged the entire continent and there’s still no sign of this gold.” “No problemo, the real treasure is the friends we... ah, right, I see the problem.”
@omegabet39124 жыл бұрын
GOLD
@Silverwind874 жыл бұрын
"We probably shouldn't have killed everyone who knows about this place." "I KNOW THAT, GREG!"
@alexemy24634 жыл бұрын
Albert Nave to paraphrase Yzma, “Maybe you should’ve thought of that before you became Colonisers!”
@phantomwraith19844 жыл бұрын
"All we get is these hundreds of thousands of tons of crappy dark silverish metal! No gold!"
@gocacola86995 жыл бұрын
*”On one hand, GOLD”* *”On the other hand, MORE GOLD.”*
@mizu76622 жыл бұрын
My takeaway from this is that even if they had found El Dorado they would have said 'sure it is a city made of gold, but it isn't a very big city is it?' and immediately begun the search for El Dorado Grande.
@wrath25015 жыл бұрын
This whole story proves one thing. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large number.
@wrath25015 жыл бұрын
@Ms.Elecitra Sky Exactly.
@davioncournoyer30775 жыл бұрын
This is a very important fact
@alexandraluster2845 жыл бұрын
It can move mountains While killing millions in the process.
@wrath25015 жыл бұрын
@@alexandraluster284 It can also build and topple whole civilizations.
@johnkirsch54795 жыл бұрын
In the words of Mark Twain, one man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity there ain’t nothing can beat teamwork.
@justnick2005 жыл бұрын
"The real gold was the -slaves- friends we made along the way" - Conquistadors
@timvanrijn82395 жыл бұрын
@@Chad_Eldridge the dutch we just sell them And the arabs do the same but the cut off balls and that isnt cool
@timvanrijn82395 жыл бұрын
@@Chad_Eldridge well i was meaning in general. But no. The british did. And the french just had the hatian revolution comit genoside on there country men left there so they just aboliahed ot durring there own revolution. Also slave trade and slavery are not banned at the same time.
@lotteg.13115 жыл бұрын
@@Chad_Eldridge I believe Dutch slavery lasted a century or so longer than the other countries in Europe on paper because the law didn't change. Seeing as everyone else stopped doing it they did as well though.
Conquistadors: “The real treasure was the friends we made along the way” Local: “you burned down a house filled with children and ripped the necklaces off their corpses” Conquistadors: “oh yeah, and the gold.”
@seanp33025 жыл бұрын
things that never happened
@harumiwashere47335 жыл бұрын
@@seanp3302 Instead they were enslaved and forced to work in mines in search of gold, yay!
@shenn.annagins71765 жыл бұрын
Sean P that’s the point
@timvanrijn82395 жыл бұрын
@@harumiwashere4733 and this is different from the former state of things how?
@vonfaustien39575 жыл бұрын
@@harumiwashere4733 given the alternative was having there villages and cities sacked in flower wars and there friends and loved ones getting carved up in ritualistic sacrifices to the Aztec gods id say forced labor is a step up not a big one but still progress unless you were the Aztecs themselves or got small pox than you really just traded one massive dick for a slightly smaller one.
@napoleoncomplex27124 жыл бұрын
As a student of Chemistry, I'm just weeping at the loss of all of that beautiful platinum... and the bloody slaughter. That as well.
@tavernburner3066 Жыл бұрын
Is platinum actually useful for something other than currency?
@napoleoncomplex2712 Жыл бұрын
@@tavernburner3066 It's used for catalytic converters in cars, but more importantly, it's also used in the Ostwald process as a catalyst for producing nitric acid, which is used in everything from fertilizer to explosives (to say nothing of its status as a rather potent acid). So yeah, it's pretty important stuff.
@alexemy24635 жыл бұрын
“Who doesn’t love a city filled with more gold than you could ever possibly spend?” - well, the Spanish economy springs to mind
@rollingthunder10435 жыл бұрын
@dimapez The principle stands: Flooding an economy with money in any form will inevitably destroy said economy.
@karenfield36654 жыл бұрын
West Africa too, where Europe had previously been getting their gold, and got absolutely wrecked... so they started exporting people.
@granmastersword4 жыл бұрын
@Zu yeah, they were more blind on the idea of becoming filthy rich and powerful that they didn't realize they were destroying their economy and therefore making products more expensive to try compensate it
@beareble-lion44464 жыл бұрын
Opium should be called Eldorado.
@chedelirio69843 жыл бұрын
To be fair, a proper theory of economics about pricing and money supply was still a couple of centuries into the future. And even with that now in our hands, to this day there's people out there saying "BUY GOLD!!!!" as the solution in case the economy tanks.
@NxTTxT5 жыл бұрын
Spain: dumps their entire national supply of platinum into the ocean me, broke and suffering from poverty: _aaron paul screaming meme_
@Grim_Sister4 жыл бұрын
Me, an artist with jeweler friends: (Darth Vader NOOOO gif)
@Peridapheniliac4 жыл бұрын
@@lilylopnco Start a bucket brigade!
@FelixHelixihare4 жыл бұрын
Wait, maybe that's what the Atlanteans used to fund their empire.
@insertnamehere29414 жыл бұрын
Dang, thats sucks that you're suffering through poverty, or at least was
@pranavghantasala68084 жыл бұрын
People who make catalysts for a living: Well it's been fun, but I'm now going to strangle myself to death
@precariousjerd5 жыл бұрын
The stars are not in position for this tribute. Stars. Can't do it. Not today.
@pixiebubbles26285 жыл бұрын
I freaking LOVE that scene!
@JAzzWoods-ik4vv5 жыл бұрын
Guys, you’re broke. You have nothing to bet with!
@Dark_Tale_20775 жыл бұрын
*One more roll!*
@musicalraven60785 жыл бұрын
Love it
@alexanderjoseph53803 жыл бұрын
I heard somewhere that the reason succession passed to the nephew was because, before the days of genetic testing, a man couldn't be sure your son was really his son, but he knew his nephew (by his sister) was really related to him.
@fancy_crow Жыл бұрын
No but that’s actually really smart tho… I never thought about it like that before
@longshot9757 Жыл бұрын
That... has a weird twisted logic to it, but it sort of makes sense.
@LineOfThy Жыл бұрын
oh sh*t that's actually genius
@DaVonE-o8j7 ай бұрын
I’ve never heard this and it stupid lol
@state_song_xprt3 ай бұрын
Yeah this actually pops up in a fair number of societies, there's similar traditions in South India
@TheTrainmobile5 жыл бұрын
How to get rid of Spanish Conquistadors: Step 1. Show them some gold Step 2. Tell them there is more gold far away from your city-state Step 3. Watch the idiots leave. They will most likely die along the way. Step 4. Profit
@apotato62785 жыл бұрын
You forgot step 1.5 Watch in horror as they loot your city/village.
@Healermain155 жыл бұрын
@@apotato6278 No, that's step 0.5
@strategicarchitect8695 жыл бұрын
There's also forcing your people into servitude for the rest of their lives but I think that's step 2.5...
@apotato62785 жыл бұрын
@@Healermain15 Showing gold to a Conquistador is like showing fear to a goose. Stand your ground, look impoverished and you should be able to fly under their radar.
@Healermain155 жыл бұрын
@@apotato6278 Not before they kill half your people and enslave the rest into murderous labour camps.
@Chaotic_Muse5 жыл бұрын
The platinum thing broke me. That's where I laughed out loud.
@Boss_Isaac5 жыл бұрын
Its hilarious!
@ZombieChimpanzee5 жыл бұрын
seriously, can't believe all that happened.
@ramdarow40455 жыл бұрын
Hearing how much was dumped made my soul hurt...
@tthach945 жыл бұрын
I facepalmed a bit too hard now my face hurt.
@zhamac15 жыл бұрын
I simultaneously laughed and screamed “No!”
@starwarzchik1125 жыл бұрын
y’all’re sleeping on the part where there’s a GIANT STORE OF PLATINUM AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN!! GOOOOO!!
@schuegrafma4 жыл бұрын
Let's form a bucket chain, we can do this!
@mizutsune50974 жыл бұрын
@@schuegrafma I don't think we can drain the ocean
@stormie56664 жыл бұрын
Mizutsune509 That’s quitters talk
@timothymclean4 жыл бұрын
@@mizutsune5097 Hey, it worked for the Spaniards! Briefly.
@wickederebus4 жыл бұрын
just do it minecraft style and build a wall around it, effectively building a damn, then just drain the smaller interior.
@chronovac4 жыл бұрын
"El Dorado is the kind of ancient city with zero drawbacks!" Economists would disagree
@nmmeswey35843 жыл бұрын
Do I hear the sound of rampant inflation and a crumbling economy?
@roelant80693 жыл бұрын
They didn't even need El Dorado to ruin their economy, just the gold and silver they found in South America through regular mining was enough to cause an economic downturn
@lloydthehedgehogirving60493 жыл бұрын
@@nmmeswey3584 USA: *Nervous sweating*
@Attaxalotl3 жыл бұрын
If you're Careful it has no drawbacks.
@danielcastillo5912 жыл бұрын
If you don't give two shits about gold, there really is no drawback Other than, you know, fabulous but hellishly unsound structures
@monanagel66165 жыл бұрын
The whole time I was thinking: "If I - as a fantasy-author - write such a story, everyone would say it's completely over the top and implausible." Then Red said it. Thank you. There are just so much things in the world and our history that you just can't make up.
@em55225 жыл бұрын
True, I feel the same as a reader with those stories that have such ridiculously incompetent figures of authority. But then history will tell me that yeah, this is plausible.
@apotato62785 жыл бұрын
The Conquistadors themselves are rather implausible to be honest. They're like lightning in a bottle. Just a few hundred greedy guys managed to bring down two empires! They just casually walked in bringing disease, unrest, rebellion and even all out civil war. Hernán Cortés and Fransisco Pizarro are both on the level of a badly written villain mixed with an edgy 14 year old boy's crappy self insert. If it wasn't widespread knowledge i wouldn't think such people could even exist.
@tempestvenator98095 жыл бұрын
@@em5522 As Thomas Paine himself wrote in common sense. If it were natural for there to be a puny race of men to rule over everybody else (aka kings and nobles ruling over everybody else) why does Nature give us Asses for Lions. Heck, even in the book of Samuel when Israel asked for a king God is like "Are you sure? You do know that they are going to relentlessly tax you and be complete douches right?" That is my paraphrasing of it, but when I read that passage I just chuckle.
@Rainbowthewindsage5 жыл бұрын
I beleive Mark Twain once said something along the lines of truth is stranger than fiction, because fiction has to actually make sense.
@oscarmendez14775 жыл бұрын
@@tempestvenator9809 Damn, I must reread that, totally miss that.
@vickytaa14 жыл бұрын
11:58 "What about Argentina? Have we tried there yet?" FUN FACT. Argentina was originally called "Virreinato del Rio de la Plata" and Rio de la Plata means "River of Silver". It was given this name because similarly to the shit going on in central America, conquistadores though there was a city of SILVER here. So of course they called the river that. "Argentina" means "Argentine" which means "silvery". So our country is LITERALLY CALLED "THE SILVER ONE" OVER THAT STUPID LEGEND AND CONQUISTADORES' GREED.
@youngking25034 жыл бұрын
Doesn't Argentina have like every other mineral except silver?
@catarinamelchiorgomes87504 жыл бұрын
But they found Potosí
@johanrunfeldt71744 жыл бұрын
The real treasures of Argentina are grazing on the Pampas.
@robinsuj4 жыл бұрын
@@youngking2503 We do have silver mines. One of them one of the most important in South America, apparently (yes you made me look it up).
@sairucha81193 жыл бұрын
Well Chile is called Chile by a bird sing, I guess you has a better name origin.
@maddie96025 жыл бұрын
"Nothing owns colonial Spain harder than it owned itself." Especially when you consider that, before colonialism, Spain was one of the premier great powers of Europe, wealthy and militarily powerful. Then they wrecked their economy with their greed for gold and silver because they didn't understand inflation, depleted their manpower and resources conquering and trying to hold onto South America until they could no longer sustain their military preeminence, and collapsed into a minor kingdom on the fringe of Europe while the British and French stole the show. I swear, a thousand years from now, I'm sure historians will assume that stories of the Spanish Empire were just allegories to warn of the dangers of shortsighted greed, and refuse to believe that all this shit _actually happened._
@AudieHolland5 жыл бұрын
Please google "Dutch Golden Age"
@clayxros5765 жыл бұрын
@@AudieHolland To be fair they also got shafted pretty hard by stuff outside their control. Spain just straight shafted itself.
@AudieHolland5 жыл бұрын
@@clayxros576 No doubt but trying to subdue the Dutch was the final straw, proving too big a bite for them to swallow. Can you imagine it? On land, they were rampaging and driving our forces back but on sea, we were raiding their colonies, capturing treasure which funded our war against them. True: we got so cocky and 'all for a profit' that at one point we were even *selling* cannon to the Spanish...
@timothymclean5 жыл бұрын
The Conquistadores left a pretty serious cultural and archaeological mark on a continent and change, and 16th-century Europeans wrote way more things down than people living a thousand years before them did. Even without getting into how modern technology can theoretically preserve evidence of veracity indefinitely, it's unlikely that any serious historian would have reason to believe the conquistadores were a myth for several millennia.
@alexandraluster2845 жыл бұрын
Holy shit, Spain almost became Atlantis.
@Kolbjornelenano2 жыл бұрын
The city where I live, Durango, Mexico, was founded when a bunch of spaniards went looking for a mountain made of silver according to the tales of some indigenous people. The mountain kinda existed, but it was actually a hill made almost entirely of iron
@mistletoecanary Жыл бұрын
A hill made mostly of iron? That’s… metal
@misteraskman3668 Жыл бұрын
El Metalico!!!
@malegria9641 Жыл бұрын
I’m from Tucson, and I wish our origin story was that fucking funny. Instead, we get a stupid priest founding a stupid mission that is now a holy site of pilgrimage for hundreds of thousands. Goddammit.
@metarcee24836 ай бұрын
I wonder where Durango, Colorado got its name. What does Durango translate to? Google isn't very helpful.
@Kolbjornelenano6 ай бұрын
@@metarcee2483 Durango means "beyond the water" it's the name of the town in Spain where the founder of my city came from. We actually have a "monument to the three Durangos" here: Durango Spain, Durango Mexico and Durango USA
@RandomShenaniganery5 жыл бұрын
I love how the natives are pranking them to their deaths
@samiam20885 жыл бұрын
They deserved it. If throwing some shiny metal all the way to Peru is a way to get the slavers focus off your village... then go fetch assholes.
@AyubuKK5 жыл бұрын
Same 😂
@dxrito62715 жыл бұрын
samiam2088 Boi im wHEEZiNg-
@starmaker754 жыл бұрын
If I were the natives I would find any way to get back at the Spaniards and clowning them on gold would be great payback
@KikiSpaghetti4 жыл бұрын
It's just a prank, bro.
@mordredt025 жыл бұрын
"Over the mountains of the moon" "Down the valley of the shadow" "Ride, boldly ride", the shade replied, "If you seek for El Dorado." - "El Dorado", Edgar Allen Poe
@vladimirenlow43885 жыл бұрын
I was hoping someone would quote this!
@MushVPeets5 жыл бұрын
...So, it's actually in some lightless crater on one of the Lunar poles? Right... somebody call Elon!
@famus_tem83515 жыл бұрын
i thought poe died poor
@albertschoise80915 жыл бұрын
Morgan Miller nice song
@eddiejc15 жыл бұрын
Aren't the "mountains of the moon" where the source of the Nile River is?
@walterthemighty75495 жыл бұрын
"I feel like the third time I got bricked into my own basement I would stop falling for the amontillado gambit." -Red, 2019 You absolute goddess
@patrickj9944 жыл бұрын
Probably one of the greatest references I've ever heard.
@geckoo91904 жыл бұрын
One of my favorite tales.
@jonnyofalltrades66204 жыл бұрын
I TICKED IT TO 666 LIKES! FEAR ME OR I'LL KILL YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR DAMNED EYE!
@Drake424244 жыл бұрын
dont like its at 669
@Hallows44 жыл бұрын
Yeah, could someone please clarify that reference for us ignorami who have no idea what she’s talking about?
@Bitterblue553 жыл бұрын
“I’ve never heard anything more legit in my entire life. Let’s go!” makes me laugh every time I watch this video
@bluelagoon1980 Жыл бұрын
It's the double zoom that really makes the moment for me. I woke my kid up laughing last time I watched this.
@naomistarlight61785 жыл бұрын
Atlantis: Plato told a story about how man's hubris doomed an otherwise ideal city El Dorado: Belief in an ideal city and hubris drove people mad...
@wickederebus4 жыл бұрын
why is it always hubris that gets all the stories? where my greed, sloth, lust [Zeus exists, but never gets real problems], and other flaws of humanity.
@naomistarlight61784 жыл бұрын
@@wickederebus Well, for lust you have the story of Aphrodite's affair with Ares, where they are both caught while making love in a golden net and laughed at by the other gods. For greed there's King Midas. There's not many for sloth. I guess the ant and the grasshopper?
@wickederebus4 жыл бұрын
@@naomistarlight6178 now I'm tempted to comb through all of Reds myth videos and build a counter for each moral and what it boils down to.
@JageshemashFTW5 жыл бұрын
Conquistadors: Where is El Dorado?! El Hombre Dorado: Yo. Conquistadors: No! The real El Dorado! The City of Gold! El Hombre Dorado: Why would we make a city of gold? That seems like it wouldn’t be very structurally sound.
@Fourtytwo42424 жыл бұрын
Conquistadors:GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLDDDDDD
@1003JustinLaw3 жыл бұрын
Conquistador: THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT SOMEONE HIDING A CITY OF GOLD WOULD SAY!!!
@animeshsingh72223 жыл бұрын
@@1003JustinLaw 😂😂😂
@brynjames37793 жыл бұрын
Also I love how when El hombre dorado says 'yo' he's also saying 'me' in Spanish. I am el hombre dorado
@flu-shot-turned-me-gay2 жыл бұрын
in /this/ weather?
@urdnotstark82705 жыл бұрын
OSP: Are you gonna like and share this video? Me: Both My friend: Both Both: Both Me: Both is good
@katrinaeibach27104 ай бұрын
I love that movie so much ❤️❤️❤️😻😻
@aster4714 жыл бұрын
Alternate title: Red Takes Over Blue’s Job For A While
@fishraposo71923 жыл бұрын
REALLY underrated comment
@karanrime89483 жыл бұрын
Blue kept falling for the Amontillado Gambit
@Vanastar2 жыл бұрын
@@karanrime8948 You'd think he'd have learned after the third time.
@gideonjones80885 жыл бұрын
"I feel like the third time I got bricked up in my basement I'd stop falling for the amontillado gambit." Yeah, I hate when that happens.
@JoeyfilmingTv5 жыл бұрын
The funnier thing about it all is they ended up finding the cerro de potosi: a mountain covered entitely in silver. They mined the whole thing and sent it back to Spain which destroyed the Spanish economy and caused the collapse of the Spanish empire and has basically been the blunder they never came back from.
@DeathBringerBecky5 жыл бұрын
interesting
@boxfox48795 жыл бұрын
Cool
@VineFynn5 жыл бұрын
The spanish empire didn't collapse because of hyperinflation
@ShinigamiInuyasha7775 жыл бұрын
It was more or less like Mordor but with funny hats...
@greenclock71525 жыл бұрын
@@VineFynn No but it got pretty bankrupt due to it
@lonelychameleon35954 жыл бұрын
"Why did Spain decline as an empire" This video:
@mithmoonwalker4 жыл бұрын
at least it was not them conquering 90% of the world but going bankrupt so you needed to start a war with china over drugs
@ElessarFrey4 жыл бұрын
Eh...the house of Bourbon, Napoleón and the hand of the british freemasons on America... Just saying, i love how you take everything of the spanish black legend as truth.
@hitsugatatsuro99784 жыл бұрын
Colonial Spain has a special hate-filled place in my heart for being from one of they places they colonized for their empire, but in general, I just hate the colonizers in history. Conquering lands because of some idealistic belief or half-assed arbitrarily-decided and culture-based reason that supposedly justifies all their wrongdoing -that's all some retarded ass bullshit, but hey, hindsight is 20/20.
@jauume3 жыл бұрын
to be fair spanish conquistadores weren't as bad as the english and french
@antaresmc44073 жыл бұрын
@@jauume to be fair thats as low of a bar as it gets
@antonioscendrategattico23023 жыл бұрын
"It's such a perfect metaphor for the failure of colonialism that if I'd read it in a book, I'd have called the writer a hack" Ngl this statement's holding up true for a lot of things these days.
@nerdyninjatemptress2 жыл бұрын
Truth truly is stranger than fiction.
@dante_09622 жыл бұрын
Sometimes I think we fail as a species
@glasscardproductions47362 жыл бұрын
@@dante_0962, we often do, but many other things make up for that.
@jeffreykirkley64752 жыл бұрын
"Think about how stupid the average person is, and remember that half of them are stupider than that." - George Carlin Yeah, simply never assume anyone is smarter than you until they prove it to you to your face, and never assume they can't possibly be that dumb until they prove it either. It's difficult to understand, but you'll eventually get it.
@justsomejerseydevilwithint46062 жыл бұрын
If 10 years ago somebody told me an idiot rich-kid actor would make PRESIDENT, I'd have sincerely doubted it.
@nettemarie80735 жыл бұрын
So basically wives of these crazy conquistadors were just: Sofia: *over a relaxing lunch* So Luis is going to this new land across the sea to get gold. Isabella: *groans* Deigo was telling me about that and about the legend. He's determined its real. Sofia: You do realize most conquistadors kill each other out of greed right? Isabella: . . . Is it time to look for a new husband? Anna across the way went through 4 husbands before she finally married a sensible man. Sofia: let's give it about a year and if they don't come back then let's look.
@nicolasgalviza79485 жыл бұрын
Serial widows!
@emmae25205 жыл бұрын
Went through 4 husbands, huh? You know, I never really thought about it, but if you pick 'em right you can get the benefits of being a black widow bride without having to kill people. Well now I have some planning to do.
@Vespuchian5 жыл бұрын
"I swear, nothing owns Colonial Spain harder than it owns itself." Having read up on the history, eyah.... Spain's quest for conquest was an unmitigated disaster that sadly took a couple of centuries to finally run Spain into the dirt so it still created that most dangerous of historical constructions: a precedent.
@gokbay30575 жыл бұрын
They Hyperinflated and therefore crashed their own economy it is glorious. And when the Netherlands were rebelling against them they had to take loans from Dutch Bankers to finance the war effort. The money said Bankers got from that was turned into funding for the rebels. It is kind of ridiculous.
@gokbay30575 жыл бұрын
@zorbas091 iirc no one else was willing to do business with them
@diegogonzalez98775 жыл бұрын
Spain's History legit reads like a Monty Python skit and as a Spaniard I don't know wether to be proud or sad.
@Littleman32405 жыл бұрын
@@diegogonzalez9877 I'd be proud.
@dragatus5 жыл бұрын
@@diegogonzalez9877 Why not both?
@andyetnobananas5 жыл бұрын
To quote Jim Sterling; “They don’t want to make money, they want to make ALL of the money!”
@marcustulliuscicero54435 жыл бұрын
Thank god for him.
@MajorRibcageIII5 жыл бұрын
Not fond of him, but I like the quote.
@timvanrijn82395 жыл бұрын
I hate that guy but accurate
@charlieterry85065 жыл бұрын
@@timvanrijn8239 that's literally Jim Sterling's entire being summed up on one sentence
@albertschoise80915 жыл бұрын
AndYetNoBananas like you should
@SchneeflockeMonsoon3 жыл бұрын
Spain: *Makes any kind of statement about its coolness ever.* Anyone who’s studied history: “Didn’t you dump your entire stockpile of platinum into the ocean that one time?” Spain: “I knew you’d bring that up! You always bring that up!”
@nickdziura73733 жыл бұрын
Good to know that spain has its own version of Emu war
@edwardramos45915 жыл бұрын
On the one hand: GOLD! On the other: PAINFUL, AGONIZING, FAILURE!
@RachelMWinship5 жыл бұрын
"Congratulations, you played yourself." - South America to Spain.
@docphoenix26195 жыл бұрын
Spaniards: Tell us where the gold is!!!! South Americans: Here´s a little lesson in trickery
@talongreenlee77045 жыл бұрын
I believe this is called “Dragon’s Sickness”
@z2yn5 жыл бұрын
LotR?
@celtofcanaanesurix22455 жыл бұрын
@@z2yn TH
@Pillzpop5 жыл бұрын
I thought it was called "Gold Fever".
@MrBEarlE5 жыл бұрын
Isn't that what happened to Edmond and Lucy's cousin?
@Glace12215 жыл бұрын
The Conquistadors shoukd have stopped spending all their time pillaging raping and enslaving to go *CLEAN THEIR ROOMS.*
@terribleexampleofacat3 жыл бұрын
Fun Fact/Story: Guyana, the country that was I born in and am currently living, was one of the speculated locations of El Dorado, to clarify; Guyana does have a lot of gold and the natives used it as decoration nothing more nothing less. When the sailors anchored in Guyana they started trading with the natives. Long story short they did not find El Dorado but instead found land suitable for cultivation of sugar, coffee and tobacco and later also cotton. And yes they enslaved the natives as labour and when they fled the Africans were brought in as slaves. When slavery was abolished, they used indentured labourers: Portuguese, Chinese, East Indians. Making Guyana a very, very vast culturally based country. And even better Amerindians are still here living on reservations in the interior highland and savannahs of our country.
@emilymarley45055 жыл бұрын
This sounds like a DND campaign that went off the rails the second the DM mentioned the word "gold.
@fishraposo71923 жыл бұрын
"Searching for el dorado" is the perfect DND setting
@Attackontrashcan3 жыл бұрын
Dm:so you're searching for a city of gold Party (especially the rouge):GOLD!...I CALL DIBS Dm: . . .
@thehermit86183 жыл бұрын
Conquistadores: the og murder hobos
@benthomason33073 жыл бұрын
@@thehermit8618 OMG that's so accurate.
@justafallperson21083 жыл бұрын
Ugh...I've been in one of those. Completely ruined the campaign for me. The tank was all about the treasure, would split off from the group, then expect the rest of us to haul his greedy ass out of trouble. Wouldn't share either.
@lokiorin55205 жыл бұрын
History has some of the worst writers... so many tropes, predictable “twists” and random deus ex machina nonsense.
@kaicreech73365 жыл бұрын
@@alexross1816 The 2019 plot twist was so obvious, I can't believe it isn't over yet.
@winterweasel4255 жыл бұрын
@@kaicreech7336 i know one of the writters, they say in 2 or 3 seasons they're kicking off another world war arc, but i doubt this will breath new life into the series.
@bobbyferg91735 жыл бұрын
Winter Weasel All I heard is that this is supposed to lead into a “subtle” genre change into Post-Apocalyptic
@Kayclau5 жыл бұрын
Nobody tell Blue.
@ExDragonMaster5 жыл бұрын
Not to mention all of the obvious retreads and reboots of the exact same stories, but with different names? Come on.
@KaiTenSatsuma5 жыл бұрын
"They found El Hombre Dorado and claimed all the gold, happy ending, right? _ehhhhhhhh_ ....depending on who you ask?
@merrittanimation77215 жыл бұрын
The Spanish at least.
@seelcudoom15 жыл бұрын
i mean, if they stopped fucking over the natives there, were satisfied in there greed and went home it would kind of be?
@1224chrisng5 жыл бұрын
@@merrittanimation7721 the silver did fuck over their economy tho
@thezeitos4695 жыл бұрын
Eeeeeehhh....
@TitaniaBird3 жыл бұрын
These days, we have companies seeking a different kind of El Dorado: *infinite growth.* And it is just as illusory and destructive as the hunt for El Dorado ever was.
@lord0jackostar5 жыл бұрын
“Nothing owned Colonial Spain like it owned itself!” I need this on a shirt; maybe with El Dorado behind.
@armiesflamefirecamco65462 жыл бұрын
The city is on legs running from a conquistador
@cheshirefiend5 жыл бұрын
The greedy part of me nearly had a stroke thinking of all the platinum that the Spanish just threw away, completely ignorant of how valuable it would become. The irony loving part of me was laughing his ass at the cosmic "wa-wa-waaaaah" that must have played when they figured it out.
@richardgibson84034 жыл бұрын
Cheshirefiend imagine throwing away a free anti any cancer because you don’t need it, and then getting cancer after you can’t get it anymore.
@pretsal49555 жыл бұрын
Francisco: *gets beaten up by warrior women* Also Francisco: *names a river after them* Me: Ah, I see you're a man of culture
@firstlast-pq1tx5 жыл бұрын
Fuck thats hot
@greennikexful5 жыл бұрын
first last wut
@evrovia89685 жыл бұрын
Shouldve been SnuSnu River.
@owlsthirdeye61744 жыл бұрын
Hearing that they dumped platinum into the ocean makes me feel physically ill
@nolanmcbride56535 жыл бұрын
“Gee, it’s almost like this place is deeply sacred somehow and f-ing with it is asking for trouble.” As a religious studies student and potential future seminarian I love this!
@caolanfeely43175 жыл бұрын
Nolan McBride seminarian
@clayxros5765 жыл бұрын
As a follow up; Man, the US keeps getting disasters and social problems. It's almost like they built their country on an ancient Native American burial ground or something."
@caolanfeely43175 жыл бұрын
ClayXros wtf is so special about Native American land if just living on someone else’s land gave you bad fortune why haven’t the migrants in Europe just died or why hasn’t japan gotten destroyed yet living on someone else’s land doesn’t give shit
@talknight25 жыл бұрын
That's pagan talk good sir!
@brigidtheirish5 жыл бұрын
@@clayxros576 You realize that by now *everyone* is living on someone else's burial grounds. Take a walk around Ireland some time. Their cemeteries got so crowded they started reusing plots and converted old head stones into paving stones and retaining walls.
@MrMaradok5 жыл бұрын
“Why was El Dorado on the map four times?” Probably for the same reason we say “Here there be dragons,” it’s just people saying “we’ve no idea what’s here, so you might find something weird, like a city made of gold, or a giant fire breathing lizard! WHO KNOWS! 🤷♂️ “
@wildhunter9394 жыл бұрын
Color me pissed when I go there and find nothing but a lot of silver and a pissed off Komodo dragon.
@richardgibson84034 жыл бұрын
Wild Hunter “ah I can’t wait to get some go- GOD DAMN IT ANOTHER GOD DAMN DRAGON WHY”
@MrMaradok4 жыл бұрын
@@richardgibson8403 Guide: To be fair sir, it says “Here be dragonS,” as in more than one.
@richardgibson84034 жыл бұрын
MrMaradok “GET AWAY GHOST I HAVE NO GUIDE”
@MrMaradok4 жыл бұрын
@@richardgibson8403 What, you never heard of a SPIRIT guide before? 😉
@AndrilKiSing5 жыл бұрын
I wanna go to the lake with some gold and just....throw it in. The Lake deserves it more than me, and can obviously protect it better than I ever could.
@ladytalksalot40973 жыл бұрын
A gold coin the approximate size of a quarter can easily put you out $1K, so I wouldn't recommend it.
@FirstLast-cg2nk3 жыл бұрын
@@ladytalksalot4097 But the good fortune that a magical sacred lake could grant you in return would easily more than make up for what you spent. I'd say go for it.
@deathburn43293 жыл бұрын
@@FirstLast-cg2nk I wouldn't recommend it, as the lake obviously doesn't give much assistance to the people offering sacrifices to it, considering what happened to the natives.
@FirstLast-cg2nk3 жыл бұрын
@@deathburn4329 Well, before the Spaniards showed up, they were doing pretty darn well for themselves, so it is a pretty safe bet, as long as you're not at risk of being invaded by the Spanish.
@deathburn43293 жыл бұрын
@@FirstLast-cg2nk you're always at risk of being invaded by the Spanish. You may not expect their inquisition, however.
@thesadisticskitty4 жыл бұрын
"I've never heard anything more legit in my entire life! Let's go!"
@jonathanfaber32915 жыл бұрын
Red’s queen’s English accent is the best thing I’ve ever heard. I mean "I've never heard anything more legit in my life. Let's go!" is Iconic on the "that's sounds like something a POOR Person Would Say!" someone really must compile a list of these iconic OSP lines
@theoschuh45715 жыл бұрын
June Kwon intensifies
@mattdelumen7505 жыл бұрын
Now this is a golden experience.
@thedoruk63245 жыл бұрын
+Matt Delumen *iS tHaT a J0j0 rEfEReNCe?!*
@merrittanimation77215 жыл бұрын
I'm truly enlightened by it.
@pedroscoponi49055 жыл бұрын
Play a fiddle for the greed of a fool make it a Requiem
@bobskywalker27075 жыл бұрын
hee hee he say funi thing from the jo jo man hee hee
@carmacksanderson39375 жыл бұрын
"Nothing owned colonial Spain more than it owned itself." Now if that isn't a quotable line, nothing is
@jaimerueda87243 жыл бұрын
As a Colombian who has lived near la laguna de guatavita this is amazing and thank you for going through our history.
@BlackrabbitStudios115 жыл бұрын
“Nothing owns colonial Spain harder than it owned itself” As a full blooded Mexican Hispanic this makes me feel insufferably smug
@seanp33025 жыл бұрын
lol mexico was more prosperous than most of the old world because of spain, now mexico is nothing.
@kiapet2865 жыл бұрын
@@seanp3302 Because using up a land and enslaving its people makes it prosperous lol
@pottertheavenger13635 жыл бұрын
Moctezuma's revenge: inflation
@pottertheavenger13635 жыл бұрын
@@seanp3302 also, how incredibly rude and arrogant. And stupid. Temperate climate, biological diversity, history, culture, art... as well as being the 15th economy in the world. How did you wandered off to this comment section?
@pixelmato1075 жыл бұрын
if youre full blooded mexican doesnt that mean you're not hispanic at all? Cus that would imply you're part spanish.
@DulceReposa5 жыл бұрын
Playing DnD I know Platinum is worth 10 coins of gold so they're fools
@ThePugDawg34 жыл бұрын
Ah, a lady of culture I see
@mistermoon93053 жыл бұрын
Or 100 gold if you are a terraria player like me
@thaddeuspowell84383 жыл бұрын
or 100 x 10 if you play both
@lonep44305 жыл бұрын
"Two things are infinite: the universe and the greed of men"
@akmayernick37224 жыл бұрын
I think the actual quote was "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." -Albert Einstein
@geckoo91904 жыл бұрын
No, I don't think that the universe is infinite. But hey, that tale teach you how to use your enemy's greed against them.
@mithmoonwalker4 жыл бұрын
the universe is not infinite but the void is
@theprinceofflumes36744 жыл бұрын
i think its true!!!!!!!!!!!!! MEH
@mrdoormat68094 жыл бұрын
@@mithmoonwalker if void means empty space then it's as limited as universe itself.
@weirdtree86113 жыл бұрын
I showed it to my professor of Latin American art and she said that she loved it and explained it much better compared to another video she showed us before about El dorado
@acloudofcurls53365 жыл бұрын
Me: Gee, I really don't have a good singing voice anymore. I need to stop trying to sing songs out of nostalgia. *[The video opens with "It's Tough To Be A God"]* Me: I HARDLY THINK I'M QUALIFIED,
@SargasGeorgiev5 жыл бұрын
100 % pure crystalline cringe
@tacticalministries35085 жыл бұрын
TO COME ACROSS ALL SANCTIFIED, I JUST DONT CUT IT WITH THE CHERUBIM!
@poweroffriendship2.05 жыл бұрын
*_And let's not forget that Road To El Dorado is actually "kids film" until Chel is trying to seduce the two protagonists._*
@petermarsella65375 жыл бұрын
Big oof
@rhyan01865 жыл бұрын
I’m amazed it went over my head as a kid
@UndeadGhostGirl5 жыл бұрын
*And* let's not forget the Road to El Dorado is actually just The Man Who Would be King but animated and with less death.
@FaceUnreality5 жыл бұрын
As a kid Chel was a big reason why I enjoyed that movie at all.
@SMon425 жыл бұрын
99.999% sure she gave the black haired one a bj at some point. (or atleast was laying on him with with her head comeing up at a angle one would think thats what she was doing.)
@tonikaycheney71205 жыл бұрын
Conquistador 1:“And the real treasure was the friends we made along the way!” Conquistador 2:”No dammit I want my gold.”
@cathorion81372 жыл бұрын
I really like Clockwork Angel's treatment of the 7 cities of gold. In those books, the cities are real pueblos in the desert, but they aren't made up of actual gold. They just have a golden windows thing going on when the light hits them a certain way. It shows how stories change over time to become really inaccurate, and is an interesting twist
@scarcovy26074 жыл бұрын
We were learning about the first North American English settlement and when my teacher "Sir Walter Raleigh" I pointed at the board and said; "I know him! He got exacuted!" And then my entire class looked at me like I was insane.
@slwrabbits Жыл бұрын
But you DID know who he was and that he got executed! That's really cool.
@ArachCobra5 жыл бұрын
A truly hilarious series of stories, except the part where the natives got screwed over. That part's not so fun.
@evah44314 жыл бұрын
You just summarized world history, well done
@dalek--ck9oy4 жыл бұрын
I mean it was for the conquistadors
@timothymclean4 жыл бұрын
At least the natives got the occasional Bugs Bunny moment between the slaughter and desecration of their sacred artifacts.
@miamafalda11184 жыл бұрын
@@timothymclean The fact that the Natives kept pranking people to their deaths while searching for El Dorado is kind of ironic and also funny
@jameswhite1534 жыл бұрын
just enjoy mental image of when the british drained the lake and it turned to concrete, there's a a load of engineers and scientists staring hopelessly at a gigantic slab of concrete and one native guy laughing hysterically.
@mischief77815 жыл бұрын
*only knows the movie* Pfft! I know *everything*
@michaeljohnangel63594 жыл бұрын
I am a HUGE fan of yours. Thank you for being so informative and SO entertaining. This is what teaching should be. Edgar Allen Poe wrote a short poem about El Dorado: … But he grew old- This knight so bold- And o’er his heart a shadow- Fell as he found No spot of ground That looked like Eldorado. And, as his strength Failed him at length, He met a pilgrim shadow- ‘Shadow,’ said he, ‘Where can it be- This land of Eldorado?’ ‘Over the Mountains Of the Moon, Down the Valley of the Shadow, Ride, boldly ride,’ The shade replied,- ‘If you seek for Eldorado!’ Fond greetings from Italy (under lockdown!!)
@WhiteOutFanYT4 жыл бұрын
Thank you for posting this! I love that poem sooooo much! It’s my childhood!
@midnightamplifier5 жыл бұрын
I always love to believe that the locals would purposely prank the Spaniards and watch them from afar eating bowls of popped corn🤣
@JohnnyElRed5 жыл бұрын
"I swear, nothing owns colonial Spain harder than it own itself." Nothing owns Spain harder than Spain itself. And we are bad at finances, basically.
@lucaswinsor44695 жыл бұрын
Except sir Francis Drake. He owned the Spanish pretty damn hard.
@Healermain155 жыл бұрын
@@lucaswinsor4469 Didn't singlehandedly ruin the Spanish economy though.
@lucaswinsor44695 жыл бұрын
@@Healermain15 Nah, only their most expensive project ever. and stealing a metric shitton of gold from them.
@Healermain155 жыл бұрын
@@lucaswinsor4469 See, not nearly as bad as what the Spanish did!
@JohnnyElRed5 жыл бұрын
@@lucaswinsor4469 You mean right before he owned himself destroying the totality of the English fleet trying to invade Spain? Basically making England lose the war because at the end of the day, part of the Spanish fleet survived, but the English didn't. Seriously. Why does everyone remember the Spanish Armada, but not the Counter Armada?
@ninjastargames2535 жыл бұрын
Sir Walter Raleigh's story of finding out that El Dorado exists sounds like me going from website to website for an assignment
@annsmalley90394 жыл бұрын
thank you, red, for keeping me company through college assignments, script analyses, and several moves. your videos are a comfort and a delight
@Rocketboy13135 жыл бұрын
Is this going to be part of a series of "Lost Civilizations"? With Lemuria, Avalon, Shangri La, and the Hollow Earth? Because that would be neat.
@Oaglor5 жыл бұрын
#RedforMolePeople
@merrittanimation77215 жыл бұрын
Lemuria was a hypothetical continent used to explain why lemurs were so similar to other primates around the Indian Ocean before the Theory of Continental Drift became popular. It’s not that interesting a story.
@lotsalot5 жыл бұрын
boost
@sarahupegui67975 жыл бұрын
I am colombian. I’ve been to the lake and they told us the story. We all think is hilarious 🤣
@timvanrijn82395 жыл бұрын
I think you guys banishing simon bolivar is pretty funny to
@AnaxErik4ever5 жыл бұрын
Ha ha ha, this is totally accurate as a metaphor for how short-sighted imperialism is when taking over a "savage and uncivilized" culture in the new world. I have been fascinated by this Don Quixote style fable since I was 7, and the Road to El Dorado was new in theaters. I myself prefer silver jewelry, but gold does make for a fascinating metal for jewel settings. And I can't help but guffaw at how Spain chucked its entire platinum supply into the ocean after finding out about it being used counterfeit gold coins, when in reality platinum is the MOST valuable precious metal on Earth. "The gold of Cortez, the jewels of Pisaro will seem like mere trinkets by this time tomorrow..." Quite an apt lyric, Mr. Odgen Styers, considering platinum is the top standard for precious metals and for hit music tracks.
@meli74084 жыл бұрын
In France we had a wonderful animated serie called "the mysterious cities of gold", totaly based on the Eldorado legends, even taking names from real places and historical characters but with a bunch of sci-fi in the last episodes. It was the absolute best!
@startrekker45965 жыл бұрын
*Can-can music begins to play when Red starts talking about Sir Walter Raleigh* Oh this is gonna be good
@RikTheRado5 жыл бұрын
"nothing has intrinsic value." Have you heard of dogs?
@theoschuh45715 жыл бұрын
Rikkidi yes
@cabowerks39735 жыл бұрын
Some of the wisest words on all the internet. 🧐👍
@artsman4125 жыл бұрын
what about water? doesn't that hold intrinsic value, cause, you know, EVERY LIVING THING NEEDS IT?!?
@timothymclean5 жыл бұрын
@@artsman412 You claim water has intrinsic value, and justify that by pointing to the external factor (living things) that gives water value. You can argue that water has _inherent_ value (water is good because it's water), or _objective_ value (water is empirically, provably good), but it's not _intrinsically_ good.
@artsman4125 жыл бұрын
@@timothymclean Um, what's the difference? Seriously asking.
@bigchooch44345 жыл бұрын
12:17 ah yes, the two genders 1. Female 2. owl-cheetah-manimal
@mmmirei3 жыл бұрын
@Jayden Dea a blemmyea. I think that’s what your talking about, but I have no clue if that’s the correct spelling lol
@Corviidei3 жыл бұрын
@@mmmirei blemmyae
@benjamingonzalez58564 жыл бұрын
"El Dorado" means something closer to "The Golden", rather than "The Gold". That's why "El Hombre Dorado" means "The Golden Man" rather than the "The Gold Man". The Gold in spanish would be "El Oro"