Woody Harrelson reads a letter about a very grumpy cat

[@08mlascelles]

I have to be honest, Delmore sounds like a legend. As someone who unapologetically holds grudges against those who have wronged me, being drop kicked by a much larger creature would leave me with a profound bitterness, particularly if I was forced to live with them.

[@angelagunn7986]

Woody's obvious delight in this letter is *everything*

[@ahumanmerelybeing]

I love how amused he was by the letter.

[@trueaussie9230]

"Everything"?! "Really?! I venture his delight would be nought without the letter itself. 🤔

[@deanthomasfleming]

4000 years ago cats were treated as Gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

[@LamarrKee]

And they resent that we Do seem to have forgotten.

[@cdes1776]

Hahaha!! My princess reminds me but she is also a benevalent ruler.

[@sloopbollocks5466]

🤣

[@aileen694]

deanthomasfleming, yes! This is my favourite Cat quote. I enjoy seeing it on my fridge magnet daily!

[@JunoDiovonaDemihof]

And only about a 1000 years ago they were very cruelly almost entirely exterminated in Europe… this is what they have not forgotten

[@lisaboban]

"He has his role, and we all respect it."

[@chromaframeyt]

The way a crow shook down on me The dust of snow from a hemlock tree Has given my heart a change of mood And nearly got your eyeball unscrewed. Delmore

[@suzymatwetwe]

👌

[@rebeccapease3746]

Brilliant!

[@DonoVideoProductions]

Bravo!

[@Crazybaby2409]

👏👏👏

[@raywalsh9152]

I begin a slow clap as I rise from my chair ...

[@mortalclown3812]

Fwiw, a few years ago, in a frenzy of optimism, I adopted two senior cats who were deemed 'caution cats', as in they scratched, etc. They'd both been dumped by separate breeders after being crated for years. Guess it was no wonder they hated people. Darn nearly about to cry just remembering how scared they were when they got here. The older one passed last year and the other has transformed. (It took 9 months for her not to flinch when my hand got close.) Last Christmas, when my oldest dog died, she cried for hours and let me hold her as we felt his loss together. She has meant so much in our lives. Please give old animals a chance. Thanks for 'listening'. 😂❤

[@baronvontollbooth484]

I hope you won't mind but I am sharing your comment with some of my cat loving friends. Very touching and thank you for taking a chance on senior cats! They need love too.

[@raywalsh9152]

Good lord. Thank you so much for sharing that. We lost our dog, Riley, several years ago and we still mourn her. Before she got sick we got her a "friend" because she was alone all day while everyone was at work or school. That "friend" is now The Queen. A beautiful strawberry blonde (less than orange tabby) lady. After we lost Riley we decided that Ruby needed a friend. Enter Bruno, a gorgeous gray tabby that is afraid of his own shadow. And this year we decided to take a beautiful little void off the streets and give her a home. Introducing Pip, or as she is known now ... Princess Pip. We are now 100% cat people. And they are wonderful.

[@worldadventuretravel]

Thank you!!! All mine are rescues. Breeding is a psychopathic industry. I can't believe how horrible humans are to animals. I'm so glad you were able to give at least two the life they deserved.

[@sandyn3384]

I will. Planning to adopt 3 abandoned older cats. I don't understand why people would just move house and not take their pets.

[@donsurlylyte]

as an old animal, i approve your comment

[@ChefMimsy]

If only we could have heard Delmore's review of John! (Always did enjoy Cheever)

[@shelleyrollins4782]

OMG YES! We need to hear Delmar’s side! They seriously changed his name? What the hell?

[@PoppyDada27]

That sounds like a great assignment for a English/writing class!!

[@rosiemackenzie5976]

Behaviour is language, looks like he communicated rather effectively, even without words!

[@wendyrichards7458]

Delmore had opinions, some cats do, I know this because I lived with one that had many, along with expectations and boundaries. He could have taught a self assertion class, except that he held most humans in such contempt (Especially vets) that he certainly wouldn't have bothered. His feelings about dogs were demonstrated when a terrier invaded our garden and left very quickly, wearing this cat like a crash helmet and howling like an air raid siren. He took a huge dislike to my husbands novelty slippers (he used to growl at them) and speeded their departure from the house by leaving his "Calling card" in one of them. His pastimes included sleeping under the bird feeder and tormenting other cats by sneaking up on them and giving the back of their heads a "Wake up" slap. His favourite hobby was to stare through the fence at the doberman next door and send it into a frenzy of frustrated barking. he woke me at 6am sharp for breakfast every morning and bellowed at me if he felt I was being a little slow, he always felt that. He had a love of sausages and would refuse to leave the kitchen when they were being cooked. Sadly sausages did not love him and the aftermath was a smell that could empty a room, he was banned from eating them. His origins were never known to us, he just turned up one day and decided we were likely looking suckers, we called him Wellington and became his subordinates for several years. I still miss his glaring ,swaggering presence.

[@mialiahh9228]

Wellington sounds amazing.

[@sammij7863]

The love you had for Wellington is obvious in every word. He chose well ❤

[@thatcasualdragon2975]

I enjoy that a large number of people tend to just have their cats show up one day. Like if you ask people about getting their dog, you'll typically hear a story about wanting one and going to a breeder or an adoption center. You sometimes get adoption center with cats, but more often than not the answer is something like "He just turned up one day" or "I found her as a kitten in the dumpster by my apartment building" or whatever!

[@BrendaSiefke]

So well written

[@olgagarcia4151]

​@@thatcasualdragon2975 yes, it's called "the cat distribution system" 😂

[@genghis_connie]

“My usual salutation to Delmore is ‘Up yours.’ “ Woody is so darned likable. Great narration!

[@Happyheretic2308]

I’ve never been that keen on Mr Harelson

[@genghis_connie]

@@Happyheretic2308 That’s okay. Free to be, you and me. :)

[@Marshall_Stacks]

@@Happyheretic2308 He's getting douchey.

[@blackc1479]

We have a couple of cats that I'm in the same boat with. (And several more with more cordial relations.)

[@genghis_connie]

@@Marshall_Stacks Well, then you shouldn’t have dinner with him if asked - especially not on a Summer’s Eve.

[@commandert5]

Changing the cat's name was their fist mistake lol

[@arcanondrum6543]

Indeed. It's only a good idea if the cat came from a bad home. For instance; THIS ONE -> 1:50 Stopped listening at that moment. Done here.

[@balthasardenner5216]

​@@arcanondrum6543Seriously. Gross.

[@dwgale01]

Cats don't need names. They already know who they are.

[@aprilrichards762]

I've changed a cat's name but it's worked out well.

[@dennypet]

I believe his last name was Leonard.

[@kimwilson2295]

My daughter Kelsey had a cantankerous relationship with our old cat named, "Leo." Every time she made him mad, he would sneak in her room and pee in her shoes. We'd know they'd had a fight when I'd hear her scream, "DAMMIT, LEO!! MOOOOOOM!!!" from upstairs. He never peed in the same pair twice.

[@deliagroer2613]

😂😂😂😂

[@Jenifer_R_]

"... and the ceiling" Like. 👍

[@wewerepirates1116]

My cat is happy, affectionate and forgiving. Which makes me suspect I do not have a cat, but a funny looking dog.

[@worldadventuretravel]

Cats reciprocate the love they are given. Dogs unfortunately will love even the most abusive, horrible owners.

[@maureenj.odonnell4438]

@@worldadventuretravel Note, cats that are not exposed to human touch, from a young age, are not wonderful pets. They make great barn cats.

[@theobolt250]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@maargenbx1454]

When I was debating what pet to get I found it interesting that when people describe a wonderful cat they say the cat is just like a dog. So I got a dog.

[@IanRobinson2yt]

Don't get too confident, the cat is just louring you into it's trap 😂

[@faenethlorhalien]

This is why I love cats. If they feel aggravated, they'll let you know. And how!

[@seattlegrrlie]

I'm with Delmore. He sounds like a cat in need of a good home

[@TanyaOwens]

Moral of the story - DO NOT EVER DROP KICK A CAT. Also, make sure you have the correct type of kitty litter in the house.

[@tricorvus2673]

My goodest boi, a black, 2003-2020. I had him and his sister from 2010. When my husband packed up and left, in my absence, in 2014, my sweet boi witnessed it. The following day when I returned home, I found my dear sweet boi had desecrated his ex father’s side of the marital bed. Pee, poop, barf. My boi was a real Forrest Gump, but he knew how to show solidarity.

[@aileen694]

@@tricorvus2673 What a great story! Reminds me of when I had a hasty move away from ex-hubby, my Calico was safe there for a couple of days. Got a Very Indignant call that she had gone into his closet and peeed all over his expensive, new "wedding shoes!" I retrieved little Flower that day. 😆

[@solitaryflower]

What a dear boi. ❤

[@fireyflower6643]

😅

[@ribaldc3998]

Found by accident: Instant flash of laughter. Great!

[@diannemose244]

Cats will tell you where to go and how to get there

[@1969Kismet]

I love Delmore!

[@garyknight8616]

Unscrewed her eyeball 😂😂😂

[@niriop]

Even a letter can be a pageant of great prose.

[@elizabethhiebert1859]

You know, I don't think that I will ever look at a Kleenex box in quite the same way again. 😂😂

[@yvonnemuller9204]

I like the little shout out to Carl Sandburg's "Fog".

[@kevinbirge2130]

Great reading.

[@chopsjazz1]

Sorry, but I disagree. The reader should take himself out of the reading, he shouldn't laugh or chuckle or otherwise respond to the text.

[@pansepot1490]

⁠@@chopsjazz1 different actors, different styles. It’s a reading, not a strict interpretation of how the author of the letter sounded. Imo, the amusement in his voice is infectious and makes the letter even funnier. A lot of dad jokes are like that: the entertaining part is the dad being amused at his own silly jokes rather than the jokes themselves.

[@AnonymousOnimous]

Alas, I attempted to drink tea during this... I think my nostrils will forgive me one day. Unlike Delmore.

[@Bobby-yagus]

Thank you 🙏 that was beautiful!!

[@wcs792]

As the husband of a woman who owns a cat that hates him passionately, I sympathize so deeply with Cheever here.

[@spmoran4703]

Its Saturday morning and i was looking for something funny to make my day . I discovered this . 😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅

[@TheTrwebster]

Need to find this- i love John Cheever's humour.

[@Rottingboards]

We have had 4 cats in 40 years. We recently find ourselves catless. We can now see the abuse that was imposed on us.

[@alexasaltz4229]

Woody rocks!!! ❤

[@tomglenn485]

Watching him enjoy himself ??? gold .... if only more people looked to literature, at every level, for the joy it can bring.

[@alexasaltz4229]

@@tomglenn485 you are so right! Letters like this one are really cool. For some, it can be the start of something more.

[@reneethorn145]

I could listen to this man read anything; a take-away menu, an instruction manual, I don't care! 🤩 Poor Delaware 😍

[@llchapman1234]

Delmore is a BOSS 😂

[@dannyarcher6370]

I love this man. One of the most wholesome people in Hollywood.

[@marketads1]

John Cheever. My favorite author.

[@gardenjoy5223]

One of my cats has decided that none of the litter boxes is good enough for her and ever since does her business there only occasionally. Gracing the entrance hall with her excrement ever so often, but never appreciated as much as when she does it in our bedroom under the screwed down desk in the farthest corner. So we must go in and under it hand and foot, scraping her thoughtful donations from the laminated floor. Which is so much more a joy when she - again - suffers from diarrhea. But believe me, nessun dorma (no one sleeps) with her gift un-taken from there.

[@fireyflower6643]

Thank you this 😅

[@Richard-od7yd]

That sounded like my cat Jesse and the relationship he had with people who were not me !! My old friend and roommate was so impressed by Jesse's dislike of people who put him on my clothesline in a sack one day that while serving time in jail told the inmates and lifers tales of retribution that made their days seem mundane . Needless to say that Many a cat was adopted by former inmates hoping to find that one Cat that would dispence justice upon those that did them wrong .

[@KT-bg7hf]

I didn't know I needed Woody Harrelson reading a letter about a grumpy cat

[@laurah.160]

this is definitely my new kink! I love old letters!

[@brigidtheirish]

Good grief, everyone's acting like he *literally* dropkicked the cat. I suppose they think Delmore also literally unscrewed a lady's eyeball. Has no one heard of hyperbole?

[@morrisjensen1959]

His welcome by the audience reflects how, the general film going public, reacts to a truly great performer. We are lucky he is with and we can enjoy his artistry.

[@marialeemlb1574]

so awesome to see Woody Harrelson

[@PamelaTitterington]

Really enjoyed this, he's great

[@aroha9090]

It's hard to take John's side when he DROP-KICKED the cat. Great reading by Woody. He has such a fantastic voice.

[@jharris3267]

Then you’ve never been mad!😂

[@balthasardenner5216]

​@@jharris3267incredibly, I've never been mad enough to abuse an animal (or a human). I think you'll find many people actually don't channel their anger into abuse. Please get mental help!

[@juliarman]

@@jharris3267 You kick children too when mad? Just curious..

[@3nertia]

@@balthasardenner5216 Tell us you've lived an easy life without having to tell us ...

[@ThatsaTechnicalFoul]

@@3nertiaEasy life?? I grew up surrounded by abuse to all living things & it’s the reason I am so loving & protective of all beings. My dog was shot after my brother put her in a dog fight & she lost. I’ve seen plenty of people use their own hardship as an excuse to abuse others & it’s the most pathetic thing not to have the will to choose the opposite path. If you fail at this, it isn’t life’s fault, but your lack of character.

[@SayMagnaFeek]

I'm on Team Delmore!

[@divi2747]

wonderful account and reading.

[@rjwh67220]

I look at everything my cat does as a death threat.

[@tristanridley1601]

They would never threaten. That would ruin the surprise!

[@3nertia]

Then why have one? :/

[@sharonkaczorowski8690]

Our now 20 yr old cat, who literally walked into our home from a feral litter, owns my husband. Anything she finds objectionable results in poop in hubby’s shoes. We are very careful to keep her life as pleasant and worry free as possible. Do not want Sammie and Delmore to meet!

[@trillium.3.24]

Woody's uncontrollable chuckles make this!

[@gardenjoy5223]

Felt the opposite.

[@jaymeelk9380]

Thanks man, this was so nice. I played it twice.

[@chrish6001]

The reference to "Fog" by Carl Sandburg

[@cathyb1273]

That was hilarious. 😂😂

[@AAFREAK]

In a way, the aura of reading this letter in this way makes it sound like this was also being read for an eulogy.

[@rosiemackenzie5976]

The final comment on a cat, they rule always, they always will. We as mere humans should know the order of things by now.

[@projectvintage1707]

I had a cat named weenie. She seemed like the same ilk as Delmore. I drove to work one morning and didn’t realize that she had left a load on the hood of my car until a coworker noticed it and informed me.😂

[@AngelicusImmortus]

One of my favourite actors superbly reading a letter - though I believe I have heard someone else read this letter…

[@tamaramartin4015]

Note to all cat owners: Hide the Kleenex 😂 😂 😂

[@doktormcnasty]

I have never heard of a cat doing this until now.

[@moorspede]

@@doktormcnasty Yeah, I wonder if they bothered to take him to the vet?

[@janemiettinen5176]

Mine went into my purse. She was mad I was away from home two nights, my husband wasn’t enough to entertain her, I guess, and she needed to claim me back as hers. She also peed on my jeans on similar situation (just one night), I only regret wearing them at the time.

[@tamaramartin4015]

@@janemiettinen5176 😂Did you check your jeans from then on? 😝

[@janemiettinen5176]

@@tamaramartin4015 If I dare to spend my night somewhere else, I’ll check everything. I wasn’t too mad about the jeans, but the handbag nearly nudged me off the edge. Anyone who has cleaned cat poop off an umbrella, wallet and keys knows what Im talking about.. especially the keys, oh dear lord, it was stuck in there good!

[@EmpyrionBlackthorn]

Love Woody ❤

[@worldadventuretravel]

I'm on the side of the cats in this.

[@1minigrem]

Brilliantly read 😂

[@Couldnteventhink]

We had a cat that would poop in the shower when they were POed at us. Cats let you know.

[@BillyAsWell]

Good to see a fellow Texan at the Hall.

[@vanessashelton3732]

Lovely

[@dan.j.boydzkreationz]

Barry Humphreys already read this letter live two years ago

[@CatsandJP]

So did Sanjeev Bhaskar and IMO they did a better reading.

[@baronvontollbooth484]

Yes, and although I like Woody's reading, Barry was much funnier. I miss him (and Dame Edna and Sir Les).

[@factsoverfiction7826]

I was trying to remember who'd read it. Thank you!

[@derekbroestler7687]

Dog "Father, I wish to join the hunt." Me "Don't be silly... There's no reason for you to hunt." Dog "But father, my brother hunts." Me "Dude, the cat's just an a-hole." Cat (Poops in Kleenex box) Me "Seeee?!?!?"

[@lisamalone2647]

This is Great! Giggle Garden.... Don't Sneeze 🤧 🐈

[@Kate-f1n]

Dear Lord. Woody 'could read the phone book and still b funny'. Read on, Sir. Read on !!! ❤🕊️

[@solitaryflower]

I swear i thought "this sounds like a Cheever story"

[@donhughes8465]

Hilarious!

[@dustintacohands1107]

Cats are almost always the peacemaker they just wanna chill not have drama

[@gnalkhere]

P.S. loved the cabin

[@karengardiner2924]

Christ almighty one minute in and I'm already dying this is killing me😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@aidandorrian920]

CLASSIC!

[@bonny9680]

Sounds like a relative of my cat Bucket..

[@Heyiya-if]

Pronounced Bouquet...?

[@CatsandJP]

You might like Caterwaul Music on KZbin with their feline songs

[@sammij7863]

​@@Heyiya-if 😂😂😂😂😂

[@StuartMiles74]

Woody tells this so well 😂

[@tammysalyer]

I need pictures of Delmore.

[@AllNicTaken]

To people who are unforgiving, which also inevitably mean vindictive unkind spiteful malicious - it’s their loss, NOT the victim or “unforgiven” or “hated” person’s loss. It’s between the hater & God & NOT between the hater & hated

[@birdshenanigans8506]

I love Kingpin xx

[@lukewarmwater6412]

Well, that is a bit more personable than " I still have your fucking cat."

[@BiddyTheYounger]

I had my cat, Boris, before I had my husband. Boris was a jealous cat. He would pee on my husband’s clothes (hubby never figured out that the floor was not the place for his clothes) Boris also had the habit of peeing in hubby’s shoes, which he could do without getting a drop on the carpet. Hubby always said Boris would outlive him. Hubby died early of a heart attack and I had to put Boris down 3 days later. I had that cat over 20 years and I think the only thing that kept him going was the will to outlive my husband

[@bazza945]

My cat barffed up in, and on, my comfy slippers. (I wasn't wearing them at the time.) The slippers now reside in the rubbish bin and the cat still sleeps on the end of my bed. Apparently, I have to overlook the fact She had deliberately selected my slippers for the deposit and that I should be grateful for the honour.

[@lady_bexy]

This has been read before on the same stage. Woody is great, but the 1st reading was better.

[@johnbeyene6117]

I agree! I came to say exactly this

[@SusanBrooks-g1p]

Don't you know..cats are freaking aliens 😮 (❤ Woody)

[@pphedup]

Go Dellmore!!!!

[@KaritKtana]

Didn't they already do this letter? Love Woody, regardless! And Delmore!

[@JamesLMason]

I'm glad I'm not going mad. I was thinking exactly the same thing.

[@mikethespike7579]

Cats do dumps in the most awkward places as an act of retribution. They really do show their displeasure in this way. Always treat your cat well and he/she will not show his/her displeasure.

[@jeepdude7359]

I would introduce Delmore to Mr, Johnny Rebeck.

[@Vinemaple]

Clean the poo out of your cat's litter boxes daily. You know the look your cat gives you when they want it done, ignore it at your peril.

[@TheKrispyfort]

I miss my cats

[@laurapoindexter9695]

❤

[@TheHiredGun187]

Ok someone lied to Woody...that cat's name was Kelsey and my sister used to own him. Kelesy had to have been the feline version of Jack The Ripper. Comes outta nowhere and claws up your legs and any other bits he can get his teeth/claws at. Hannibal Lechter would fear Kelsey. (Kelsey died in 2006). I was both sad and elated.

[@KathyBGood]

a few days ago i got too friendly with a crabby cat i catsit,. He face slapped me 3 times in a millisecond..whamwhamwham. I have 5 claw marks & 1 deep one close to my eye. If I ever need an eyeball removed, I know where to go. Until then I shall respect his boundaries!

[@afrog2666]

"here`s your Cleanex! Whaaaat? It`s not good anymore? Oh well, sucks to be you I guess"

[@voidabstraction]

What no mention of Rampart?

[@krishurlburt7375]

Wind from the northeast? This must be New York

[@jeffmunson8144]

legend

[@karengardiner2924]

Serious warning here folks. Do not watch this if you are eating salt and vinegar chips because the burn in your sinuses is unreal😂😂😂😂

[@billpetersen298]

How I miss, Stewart McLean.