Life Before the Lifeboat: San Francisco's Courageous Response to the AIDS Outbreak

[@mariekatherine5238]

I had a friend, a black, married heterosexual woman who volunteered for God’s Love, We Deliver. She got called into her boss’s office and told, point blank, that she either stop volunteering or resign her job. She refused to do either and got fired on various technicalities. She had not a judgmental bone in her body. Lora saw people suffering and in need, and she helped them. Simple as that.

[@Texaslawhorn]

She sounds like a great woman.

[@arricammarques1955]

Caring & helping never goes unrewarded.

[@clevelandwilliams5922]

We are going through the same with Covid-19

[@tula1433]

@@clevelandwilliams5922 not true. Nurses wouldn’t even go into patients with AIDS rooms or deliver food to them in fear of it.

[@clevelandwilliams5922]

@@tula1433 Covid 19 is no where near as deadly as AIDS and look what government coupled with people’s compliance did to our society and the people with AIDS got nothing but to be treated like modern people who no one wanted

[@catherinestephenson6067]

The sheer bravery of those nurses and doctors who treated those with HIV and AIDS at a time when no one knew how the disease was transmitted. Those who maintained the humanity of the patient. Who treated without condemnation of who or how they loved.

[@danielmorse6597]

Many became infected. I will also point out. When were were giving care. I often got the flu, infections mainly in the lungs from the simple fact so many had pneumonia and stuff going uncontrolled. My biggest fear was TB and Hep. I knew a few guys who had TB and had to be in isolation.

[@shawnafuego26]

Catherine Stephenson ❤

[@lamejor19]

Yea my grandma took care of a lady with aids in Honduras. A small poor country were not much people were educated of the sickness.

[@FriendofDorothy]

there were more of those in the '90s, but the '80s? OMG; they sent me, the gay social worker, into the rooms a lot as I imagine they were terrified. So was I, but I put a face mask on if it was respiratory; I wasn't afraid of the KS or any of that. I tried. god knows I tried; I wish I could've done so much more...

[@FriendofDorothy]

I wore a face mask as so many of my patients had pneumocystic carniii pneumonia. I hated doing that and always apologized to my patients but it was advised. I did take their hands when they reached for me and also knew that the lesions were not contagious. I just did the best I could as so little was known at the time. In retrospect I wish I could've done more had I known all I know now about HIV and how it is transmitted, etc. I remember them, things they said to me, their faces; it was my job and I was still pretty young. What was I to say? "Hang in there 12 years and they'll have a combination of meds that will work for you?" No one knew that then.

[@niclawson1520]

I lost my lover in 1988. Those were very horrifying times. Thankfully my Lesbian sisters stepped in to help. San Francisco truly was the model for AIDS care and wellness. Painful times I would never change, they have made me who I am now. I dodged the HIV bullet somehow. And I've survived cancer four times.

[@NickanM]

Nic Lawson .......❤.......

[@804smiles]

Nic Lawson wow u have an amazing story jus from the few lines u wrote baby live ya best life which i know u are!!! Stay blessed baby God has amazing plans for u and every1 who lives u touch!!!!!!

[@RandolphAgarn1]

I also dodged it, but i think it was because i was 18 in 1978 and went into the military and had little gay sex, far to paranoid about getting caught. l got out of the military in 83 and by then Aids was in full swing and it terrified me. 99% of the time i ever had an orgasim it was because i jerked off.

[@MM-hq2xb]

I’m so sorry for your loss.

[@stassitaylor7799]

Nic Lawson I'm very sorry for your loss.

[@Kitsaper]

I’m a gay man, it’s 2020 now and I’m 47. I just put that there for context... there’s a lot I could say, but all I need to say is: 1. Thank you for this documentary. 2. Young people, you’ll appreciate your life even more by occasionally looking back to see where we’ve been, what you’ve missed. Not just HIV/AIDS, but in many aspects of human life. The day you were born was not the day the Earth started turning. Take care of yourself & your neighbors. - Ray

[@JuanLopez-rl7ry]

Maybe you should convert to Christianity as homosexuality leads to death as St. Paul mentions

[@thetimmy755431]

@@angelopaoletti4768 well said.

[@Yesitisbrett]

Said perfectly

[@deadraccoon5210]

thank you Ray!

[@lebusraconte3040]

Thank you Ray. Claude from France. 💐🍀💐🍀💐🍀💐🍀💐🍀💐🌈

[@dryard7981]

My great uncle died of AIDS in 1990 at 35 due to a blood transfusion that was infected. I feel for everyone who has to live with this disease or have died from it. It's so heartbreaking.

[@shawnafuego26]

Elizabeth Drew exactly sorry for your loss.Multiple ways this disease was transmitted blood transfusions.Infected thousands of people. Let's acknowledge those lost as well this way.

[@SicilianStealth]

Thank you I'm sorry for your loss but I'm nowhere near death in fact I am undetectable because I take care of myself.

[@cindyortiz4552]

My sister too. I do not feel sorry for others.

[@danieljohn428]

Was ur uncle a vampire? Or a Jamaican blood clot?

[@piscesempress1978]

May your great uncle rest in peace. I am sorry for your loss.

[@FriendofDorothy]

I was a gay man in L.A. when the epidemic became news and was first being talked about here in the early '80s. There was a lot of denial and a lot of "it's only the drug users and the such and such guys that are getting it", etc. Then the "such and such" list of guys exploded to include practically everyone. Suddenly it was right in my face as I was a hospital social worker, so I was dealing with AIDS patients who were my peers on a regular basis. Then it began striking my boyfriends, one by one. I had 6 of them and lived with them for varying periods of time'; we were all young and all had been sexually active. 4 of 6 died of AIDS one by one. A 5th was HIV positive but made it up to 2008 when he died of lung cancer. My only still living ex BF is alive ( a New Yorker, ha! tough as nails, and negative... I know exactly why he is alive but never mind that!) There is more to the story, much more... the story of a man who has not the least explanation for why he is still alive and survived the gay Hiroshima. I was just thinking the other day, "I never really had a chance to even cry for one or two or 22 or for us ALL because they all went so fast; nor any chance to cry for 'that young gay social worker' who went into hospital room after hospital room knowing the next patient I saw might be someone I knew or had seen out or danced with or even... had sex with..." No, I do not believe I survived because I am special or was "chosen" to survive (how narcissistic!) or because God has some 'special purpose' for me. They were all people; all those who died were special... It's just some random enzyme or molecular mystery, like buying a lottery ticket in a gas station with your last buck and then winning, I lucked out... but, that being said, I do thank Whoever is listening every day that my biggest health issue this month is I need a teeth cleaning. I am here; only god knows why, it's the mystery of my life, but I won't take it for granted. A lot of ghosts inhabit my dreams where they are most welcome, if painful reminders. There is always more to a story like this but this is just a post, not a memoir! Reminder to self: edit, honey: EDIT!! (

[@FriendofDorothy]

Thank you. I sometimes remember all of the patients I saw as a hospital social worker during the '80s.. As I was out and known to be gay I was asked to go into the rooms and see AIDS patients (often my peers!) during the time when there was still a lot of fear among those whose job was to care for them. Sometimes I wore a face mask, other times not. There is almost nothing more tragic than young people or relatively young people facing death when they thought they would have their whole lives ahead. It was horrifying to me, and I just tried to help as much as I could but on any given work day I would think, "And I will be the next one connected to that IV pole or with a breathing mask." But it never happened. I wish so much that all those guys and a few women could've hung in there until 1996 or so when the meds started working and people came back from the brink of death.

[@troyp9485]

I’ve never cried after 1990. Between 1985 and 1990 almost everybody I knew died. Everybody died so fast. My world emptied out. Young men cut down in their prime. After 1990 some people survived until the new meds saved us but it’s like we never came back to life. I’m still depressed and anxious. The horror won’t leave.

[@sheilacalloway4218]

If you ever write a book or memoir, i so need to read it! The way you told some of your story has touched my soul in some many ways I cannot even explain. You seem like an awesome person, so glad you made it out of that HELL, and so sad for whom you've lost... w/love and kisses xo Sheila

[@FriendofDorothy]

@@sheilacalloway4218 Perhaps I am not supposed to say this , but I HAVE. 4 of them.... 2 were published; two self-published, but all are still available on Amazon. All are fiction, but one? Well, yes, you got me there... it's a memoir disguised as fiction. It was my first novel and is called "My Strange Little Oasis". And yes,I survived what my protagonist did, almost all of it, and yes I experienced the power of friendship although "Audrey" (my best female friend) passed away 2 years ago of Alzheimers in her '70s but Adam is hanging in there, just older... and Night Cloud, the feisty Native American spirit who came to earth from the other side to help "Ren" get through the worst crisis of his life. He was my "guardian angel" and a vivid presence, This won't make sense until you've read the book ( a trilogy, by the way) but I have to laugh a bit here: Night Cloud was NOT happy when the publisher of the book returned the rights to the book to me after a few years and spotty sales as the publisher's company was only having success selling romance books. The morning after I got her letter telling me this I opened my front door, and on the step was a "Dream Catcher"! I was FLOORED. My neighbors have not read my books, none are Native American, nor could they have known the incredible emotional significance of that artifact to me personally ( Night Cloud gave Ren a "dream catcher" in the book to help him ward off the bad dream he was living through).... sorry, Sheila; editing myself is not my forte. "Oasis" is dark( but infused with hope and light), and writing it helped me get through an absolute nightmare. It just so happened that my nightmare was not AIDS itself, but surviving the fallout and side effects.. Thank you for such a sweet and supportive reply to my post. My story is largely untold; I am grateful for anyone who is interested in reading it and that is why I wrote "My Strange Little Oasis"... I am one of the the boys who survived... it all....

[@sheilacalloway4218]

@@FriendofDorothy THANKS...I WILL BE PURCHASING...:) XOXO

[@ronw484]

In the early to mid 80's, I knew someone in San Francisco and warned them during a visit that they'd better be careful as their was evidence the disease was sexually transmitted. He loved going to the bath houses and refused to stop. I was mocked mercilessly for giving my warnings and treated like a nut standing on a street corner holding a sign saying "the world will end tomorrow!" Even his roommates were derisive about my warnings. Of the four people living in that house, three died of Aids. The fourth fellow was in his late 70's and survived. He said that towards the end for one roommate "R", that he had lost so much weight that even he could pick him up off the couch and this was from a guy who was barely over 5 feet tall and weighed about 110 whereas the roommate was over six feet tall and had weighed about 190. He weighed far less than 100 lbs when he passed away-about 80 pounds. The surviving person burst into tears and told how once the diagnosis was made, all their friends deserted them in droves and wouldn't even come across the bridge for fear they'd get Aids too and that they wouldn't even call on the phone. I tell this story so people will know that the fear was so great that many people were deserted by even their closest friends. It wasn't like everyone came together to fight and support each other as many videos show. A lot of people were treated like absolute dirt and thrown away like garbage and not just by family members but by their gay so called friends as well.

[@marlzz8126]

Ron W were these all old men living together? Dang that crazy that even the gay friends deserted them. I watched a few of these docs and some of the people say their families said to stay away not welcome home ect.

[@tetsuan25]

Most gay men then and now don't really have close friends. They have acquaintances, people the have had sex with. A real friend would never desert you.

[@reasonrestored9116]

Must be great being you. Yeuch

[@ted1091]

Truth.

[@salvadordali5793]

I came out in 88 I was 20. there is truth in his comment. I remember being so excited to realize/accept that I was gay excited to meet people. n there was so much fear and distrust. I went to get a haircut n the stylist clipped my ear n it started to bleed. he broke down in tears, was sobbing. I told him it was ok. I couldn't figure out what was going on. he had someone else finish my hair. when I left I thought maybe he thought I had aids.. he died that same year n the other stylist told me he was afraid he could have infected me because of the cut n blood. it was so sad.

[@TMendocino]

I came out in my 20"s in the 1980's. 80-82 were magical. Then the nightmare was in full swing in 1983. Every month I was going to a funeral. In 1985, I attended my last funeral. 15 at that point. I told myself no more. I can't do this anymore. I lost my best friend, my sister lost her best friend. I lost a co-worker. Then I lost 13 close friends in my group. I just couldn't do it anymore. By 1991, I had lost my Partner to suicide and for the next 10 years. I just went back into the closet and concentrated on my career. I rarely look back. To this day it is too hard. I remember my friend Eugene, his family had turned against him. He was alone and no one wanted to touch him. I would drive 70 miles to go see him. My Mother would go with me and she would hold him in her arms and hold his head. I will never forget how incredible a gift that was to Eugene. He had gone blind from CMV. He would just cry and she would just hold him tightly. No one today that wasn't there can imagine the horror. Eugene died at 28 years old. My God, 28.

[@kathleenhendron6146]

Thank you for sharing this

[@kayjay407]

I remember.😢

[@etheldingleberry8075]

That’s what you get from taking a D in the A. It’s not natural.

[@ivorwm2291]

The nurses and lesbian women helped me. They were very kind and helpful. I cry when I see these films. I lost so many friends. I'm still negative and I didn't plan on living this long. I'm 63 and I wish that I could deal with the loss. I got so familiar with what to do when someone died that I sailed through my parent's funerals.

[@nataliewhittington6856]

Hi Ivor. Thinking about you. I just read your comment about not planning on living this long. I know what you mean. 💖

[@user-sh2rc5kc7x]

Sending you love , strength and well wishes. Trust in God and pray through your pain. Thank God your friend had you to support them through such a difficult time and I am glad that you are here to tell their stories x

[@deadraccoon5210]

thank you for sharing.

[@lebusraconte3040]

You can't imagine how I respect you. 💐🍀💐🍀💐🍀💐🍀💐🍀💐🌈

[@helendapier6273]

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[@_letstartariot]

I’m glad I watched this. I’m 32 and work with HIV patients, and it’s quite different to what probably felt like bio-genocide occurring in the 80’s/90’s. Especially the mass deaths of the 90’s. I still see AIDS patients. But a vast majority of them are given HAART and are saved from the brink of death. They go from having full blown AIDS, to just having HIV and chronic but manageable health conditions. I bet that was unimaginable in 1990. People still die from AIDS. I’ve seen it myself. Been there when they’ve taken their last breath. But it’s not automatically fatal to have HIV or AIDS in 2022. It’s one of the many reasons I continue to fall in love with science over and over again.

[@Phushprada1]

The skeptic in me has always suspected AIDS to have been used to carry out bio-genocide on populations nobody wanted but did not count on it getting out of control or maybe they knew it would get out of control, they just didn’t care. Just as I believe covid 19 was used for depopulation. But then again I’m a skeptic and an over thinker!!!!

[@LG-33]

I was there as a social worker and I’m watching this 30 years later and I was there helping those men and watching them die heart wrenching.

[@heidigone]

Do you know what song is playing in the beginning of this documentary?

[@JoshP037]

I'm in my early 40s and somehow this made me realize that, wow, we just about lost an entire generation of gay men. The generation older than me (baby boomers). The world's a darker place for that loss. I hope that gay men my age and younger would want to live their lives in tribute to the men who died so young.

[@tototita413]

and the ones that survived !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@brianbowlby3605]

i lost all my gay friends.

[@tototita413]

I survived the AIDS epidemic I was a sister nun in San francisco in early 80's I lost all my friends but today we have the corona virus no fun for the new generations if your scarred now it was smae in the 80's w AIDS very scarry i'm in my 60's now will I survive the corona virus I will Have to sing a Gloria Gaynor song I WILL SURVIVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!! we all have to sing and dance on this song now !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@Runeakb]

Being a bisexual man I am thankful I was born in 1988 and not in 1958. Even though I am still faced with stigma, I am not going to die of it, and I do take my precautions.

[@Runeakb]

Yes, maybe the AIDS epidemic in the big cities of western communities was a warning that sexual liberation does not come for free. You have to take care of yourself and think about not living a too decadent lifestyle. I would dare to compare this sexually liberated lifestyle to the lifestyle that many westeners, especially Americans, live, where they eat themselves to death. No sofrosyne or abstinence

[@avalondreaming1433]

The young people of today need to realize what a horrifying time this was. It came in like a lion and out like a lamb. No one talks about this anyone and it's a slap in the face to those who died and those who lost loved ones.

[@8COSMIC8]

Totally agree, young folk just dont get it. The most shocking thing ive heard was from a 16 year old boy saying " "well you dont die of it now, "

[@FriendofDorothy]

@@M60gunner1971 That sounds like a sweeping overstatement or feverish fantasy. There was, in actuality, a huge modification of behavior and sexual practices in response to AIDS. It is easier to make an overstatement of criticism and condemnation like that than to acknowledge the reality of how people responded.

[@SkyscraperM]

M60gunner1971 fuck you

[@sprintbass]

@@SkyscraperM agreed...

[@sprintbass]

@@FriendofDorothy don't bother...the funniest thing is he's here at all...

[@rubencohen2936]

Many of us Gay men who lived in the 1980s and 1990s and test HIV negative have survivor's guilt. I lost the love of my life, a former boyfriend, and took care of another friend who's family threw him away until the day he died. By some miracle I missed getting HIV infected and continue to help those who are. I know I will see all of the people I have lost on the other side someday.

[@WW-jh2ge]

M60gunner1971 But enough about you… By the way, your liked videos are as lame as you are.

[@sirandrelefaedelinoge]

💎💎💎

[@sirandrelefaedelinoge]

@@M60gunner1971 You embarrass yourself, Tail Gunner1971.

[@rubencohen2936]

@@sirandrelefaedelinoge Agreed 👍♥️

[@keithboy1993]

My mother went to Columbia and lived with a group of gay guys in the late 60s and early 70s. She became very active in the gay community and actually witnessed every single one of her best friends die of AIDS. I know the pain it caused her changed her forever. I am gay myself and she only cared that I am safe because of it.

[@SkyscraperM]

Hannible100 fuck you bitch

[@SkyscraperM]

Fredd Hernanadez literally shut the fuck up

[@stassitaylor7799]

What a terrifying time. Those infected early on didn't stand a chance and they were basically ignored and abandoned by the federal government.

[@angier6118]

Stassi Taylor nooooo...absolutely not true. Local government bodies poured much funding and research into it as soon as they began to see there was a serious and legitimate problem.

[@WW-jh2ge]

angie r Pretty hard to make much headway “locally” when the actual federal government ignores it for years… which is exactly what happened.

[@FriendofDorothy]

@@angier6118 define "as soon as" please.... I was there. Had it not been for ACT UP and street demonstrations, etc. the government was unconcerned. Please google "Larry Kramer"..

[@katiekuchen9694]

@@angier6118 The virus began in 1981 the President didn’t acknowledge it until 1987 !

[@XxxX-wx3er]

They tried to help them by issuing warnings about sex, by trying to close down the bath houses, by stopping them from giving blood.. all the same preventative measures that the polio children got. But the gays said “NO!”, we aren’t changing, you can’t restrict us!”. Then cried no one helped them. They tried.

[@antonioramos4514]

I lost family members, co-workers and friends to this. I am now in my 50's , and not many people of my generation survived. There's hardly anyone my age to date anymore. They're mostly gone. These nurses and doctors were braver than I will ever be.

[@Scampergirl]

I have a gay friend who said the same thing. It's a lonely life.....

[@Volundur9567]

@@Scampergirl same. It's amazing that we can be so disconnected from that reality due to medical breakthroughs. I fear this will lead to widespread complacency.

[@cindyalvarez3849]

God bless the KIND nurses and doctors! Not the rude and disrespectful ones who would refuse to treat patients!!!!

[@yay-3012]

I remember the first time I saw the AIDS blanket I was 14 and not very sympathetic towards this “gay” disease. Until I saw all the names and pictures of the people. I started crying so hard I had to walk my bike back home.

[@productofgrace4960]

@@M60gunner1971 what a cruel thing to say

[@M60gunner1971]

@@productofgrace4960when the truth hurts that bad, you know it's correct. Why is it cruel to call someone what they pride themselves on, what they march in the streets proclaiming to be? You need to examine yourself.

[@productofgrace4960]

@@M60gunner1971 you are as clueless as you are disgusting...seek help

[@michaelmccarrol4523]

Funny how homophobes watch this stuff

[@MikeSmith-ve2qu]

Why lol

[@NoctisAquila]

I am not sure that all nurses understand just how much of a crucial and profound care they can provide. Truly magnificent!

[@travisrick]

I lived through this horrible disease in the Castro in the 70’s-80’s. I was a bartender at the Castro Station for many years and knew so many of my patrons who lost their battle to AIDS. Many of whom I worked with. It was a very sad time in my life watching so, so many people being sick and struggling just to carry on with life.

[@andytaylor5476]

I lived in SF (Castro) during this time (still do)and this is a remarkable insight to what came about when this most terrible health issue was killing off the world as I knew it. The health professionals presented here are some of the angels who made a difference. The loss is still unbearable, and still I weep at times. They were bright stars in my galaxy! Gone, cruelly, and they are missed!

[@josephinetracy1485]

Homosexuals demanded that this epidemic be treated as a civil rights issue rather than a medical emergency, which cost them millions of lives! All out of their GD fetish for attention! A limited quarantine would have saved tens of millions of lives worldwide, but their snooty attitude just wouldn't have it.

[@nevstar63]

I lost so many friends during the 80's and very early 90's in Australia. I thank all those who cared for them and worked in the AIDS wards. It was such a hard time. Some people were just so commendable, giving and caring toward others that really needed the love and care.

[@nicholasjohnson6724]

I worked at Eversliegh Hospital in Sydney during the early 90's as an RN. They were awful times, just devastating. It's amazing how quickly people forget.....

[@yolexisdiaz4743]

Omg

[@US_ARMY_25_INF._DIV.]

I have a weakness for trans women...i need to watch this when i get the urge....even with prep i do not need any of this shit in my life....as well as all the other std s ......40 mins of sex is not that important in the long run

[@_letstartariot]

@@US_ARMY_25_INF._DIV. I recommend finding a sexual health clinic in your state and talking about it with them. You may not need PrEP. But they can prescribe it for you. I know going to your regular GP maybe intimidating.

[@US_ARMY_25_INF._DIV.]

@@_letstartariot no I am done it's not worth the STDs all the viruses and diseases you can get from that type of sex I'm just going to stick with healthy women and enjoy my health in my life...

[@Lightningslick]

I started doing AIDS charity work over 16 years ago. I thought, by now, that AIDS would be a thing of the past. Despite the progress that has been made, we are practically at the same point where we started. Just because AIDS is no longer a DEATH SENTENCE, it still is an awful disease to manage.

[@FriendofDorothy]

Thank you for doing the work you did. However, we are by no means "at the same point where we started" in which those diagnosed with HIV died within a relatively short period. Most of the brick and mortar AIDS hospices closed by the early 2000s and I rarely saw patients in the hospital (as a social worker) once the medications were proven effective at suppressing the virus. Big pharmacy long ago recognized the profits to be made from HIV. It was as if they had struck gold. Ask a pharmacist how much a single anti-retroviral tablet would cost a patient if paid out of pocket; it is jaw-dropping. We are nearly 40 years into this and there is still no such thing as a generic HIV drug (that I am aware of). AIDS is now an industry, a huge industry...

[@the2kking307]

What are you talking about? It is a death sentence.

[@edbarron]

@@FriendofDorothy we still have 45,000 new infections annually here in the states. People in 3rd world countries don't have access to the same meds we do. So yes we've made progress here in the stated but this is still a world wide pandemic

[@kristenjensen2589]

When i was 13, i went with my parents to San Francisco. The beauty, the magic, the energy in the air all overwhelmed this girl from a little Minnesota town. A 😮much older cousin lived there, having escaped the oppression in Minnesota decades before. He was a quit private man in a committed relationship and so did not contract the virus. I thought SF was heaven on earth i was devastated when i returned in 1986.. You could have shot a cannon down the empty streets. As if a nuclear blast had wiped out the population, leaving the buildings. Aĺl the joy had evaporated. Those wonderful people were gone

[@theopinion9452]

Wow!..I am not a gay person but I do feel for all of them,especially how our own federal government,led by Reagan,decided to ignore our own fellow humans!

[@Lisabug2659]

I will never ever forget taking a flight to Chicago heading towards Rush’s HIV unit where I could be with and say goodbye to a loved member of our family. The patients, their eyes, the physical pain was intense but the loneliness and sheer abandonment was beyond disturbing. Patients would sit in wheelchairs outside their rooms to have the most minimal of human interaction. The nursing staff said it was not common to see such a constant stream of support and family visiting the unit. Being able to see just how devastating this disease was so up close and personal had an everlasting impact on me. I tried to watch the movie Philadelphia and could not suppress uncontrollable sobbing. I did not recognize my own sound of sorrow. It has been over 30 years and the memories are vivid, the feeling of the loss of these men still resonates.

[@danielmorse6597]

Thank you, Thank YOU! THANK YOU everyone who set the standard of care. I still remember the rooms of dying men. I was so young and I will never forget. The kids today do not know. I spent time in a hospital recently. I told the young nurses how bad it was. They were speechless. I am alone now. All my people have passed. Still, I will always remember them. Thank you so very much to you all for so much dignity.

[@gazepskotzs4]

OMG, i was so fucking frightened during that time, sex was no option for me, i kept away from it all, to me you are a war hero!

[@danielmorse6597]

I am just a guy. The hero's were the people who fought all the way to the grave and beyond. One friend of mine started a high speed chase with the police and ran into a large oak tree. They had to cut him out of it. he wanted to go out with a bang. We can look back and poo poo it but he felt he had to do something. Still, the biggest sadness were the children. I was in Chicago at a rally. There I met a gal there with her husband. Her baby and him were infected. She got bad blood. They were so focused on the children they already had. They were a mixed human color couple. The kids they had were forced out of school in the burbs. They moved back to the city for services, medical care and protection. I remember holding the baby and changing her diaper. Already she had chronic rashes. No one else would change the diaper. We still were not sure how HIV was really transmitted. We could not trust the medical establishment. Frankly I still do not. Hero's like the rouge doctors and nurses who bucked the system and got us funds and bed. The care givers. The nameless people who will never be thanked. For every devil who tried to kill us, 10 angles came silently. They, so many have passed on now 30+ years later. I remember the day Jeff died. I was so tired of death. I wonder why I am still here.

[@gazepskotzs4]

I m so sorry, it sounds like you really had your share of trouble! I want to say something uplifting but that sounds cheap , what good does an uplifting word wen someone is full of hurt. Stil, try to enjoy friends, it works for me. Here in the Netherlands at the farmland i had a couple of friends that were infected and died and someone stabbed me with an infected needle at one point, i didn t got infected. In Amsterdam and other larger cities the problem was much more obvious, here it was more covered up and silent. I have a fear of intimacy stil do. It touched us in so many different ways. Hang in there and i hope you wil have happiness in your future! xxx

[@danielmorse6597]

Patrick, your experience is so familiar here too. In your contry there was early efforts to at least deal with the very real human fragility of the issue. Of course your nation has always been a place of sturdy common sense when it comes to health issues. This is the first time we knew something was very very wrong. We lived on our farm also. It was Sunday. My grandmother was reading the paper. She gasped and called us over to her. Not a dramatic woman in her own right. Sensible and a woman of the world. She was pale, there in the newspaper she pointed out to all of us age after page of obituaries of dead men. Young men and men in their prime. Three to four pages of obituaries of these men. Ours was a small regional daily newspaper. She told us she had not saw that many obituaries since WWII. The adults had a long discussion. Already there were rumors. Our gov and health system turned its head away and we died. That is the truth of what I saw and the reality.

[@gazepskotzs4]

The first hiv test i got was an awful experience, the doctor lifted his eyebrow and asked if i liked or loved men ( i stil don t understand the relevance of that question ), he then continued treating me like the dirtiest thing he saw in his life and told me that i must realize that they had been told by the government not to inform people about their status because it would create hysteria among people. I told him that if i found out and was infected and he was the one that didn t came forward with this info and i found out i infected loved ones, i would come to burn down his house ( after that i decided to switch to a more modern doctor ) In the not that rural places doctors weren t like that . I don t believe the doctor i saw was telling the truth, he was just a retarded and fascist moron in my opinion. But i know you re telling how it was and is, momentarily i believe Africans are even more fucked wen it comes to aids and homosexuality. Why are people cruel to others who don t attack them? The human race is a weird species. Dan, i hope you have a nice day anyway and don t watch to much of this stuff, Love and greetings from Holland!

[@ainspection7028]

God bless those who were lost to this terrible disease and everyone who helped them.

[@erikathoreson5786]

My godfather died from AIDS in the early 90s, I was only 2 years old. My mom was with him everyday until he took his last breath....

[@LG-33]

I was an AIDS social worker in San Francisco in the mid to late 90’s. Omg I haven’t seen anything like it since. My heart is still there with all those men.

[@mattdobbs-dr2rt]

Well they enjoyed it😢

[@LG-33]

@@mattdobbs-dr2rt I don’t know. But it was the most important social work I’ve ever done.

[@romie1967]

God bless these kind and brave caretakers!!!

[@greggonzalez859]

“Treating the patient but nit being afraid “ at the same time. I laid in bed with my father thinking I’d rather catch it than leave him. But at first I was very afraid but the love was stronger. Rest In Peace Papi.

[@mandieharris7428]

I am a straight middle aged woman I pass judgement on no one I live my life in my opinion as everyone should whatever floats your boat you be kind to me I'll be kind to you! This was an awful time my heart goes out to anyone who lost their battle with this hellish disease.

[@johngolden891]

Many of the late 20th Century's greatest saints have gone uncanonized, but their kindness, care, love for those facing death under terrible circumstances shall never be forgotten.

[@marcusfarias7219]

Thank you for this documentary, the new generations doesn't know the fear, sorrow, sadness, loneliness, anger and the activism that shaped the 80's and 90's. In 1982 when the AIDS crisis exploded I was 15 yo son of a catholic family in South America, with a homophobe father and I was absolutely terrified, and 8 years later I was doing my Nursing Degree and clinical placements at AIDS Ward, I never felt fear about the patients I was terrified of accept the fact I was gay and it took me more 9 years to finally come to terms with my own sexuality. Today we have Prep/PEP and anti retrovirals treatment. I can only think the huge number of talented people we lost and the world could be a different place if we did not loose them. Now I am a 54 yo Happily married gay man living in London, life could not be better for me.

[@stonedzebra420]

❤ love to you sir

[@ShamrockParticle]

best of luck in your marriage.

[@giovanelino3056]

É brasileiro

[@billy5402]

Gentrifier

[@SuperIngibjorg]

I am so glad that these doctors and nurses where there at that time for the infected people... Really moving to see... Bless all of you doctors, nurses, patients and loved ones

[@edbarron]

Many of the nurses would not treat people with AIDS back on the day

[@gerardmackay8909]

I was 21 in the summer of 1983 and was on the verge of embracing my repressed sexuality when I watched a documentary about a mysterious illness affecting gay men in NYC entitled ‘Killer in the village’. It absolutely altered the trajectory of my sexual journey and my newly acquired caution very likely saved my life. Sometimes throughout life’s journey timing is everything. Awesome documentary and the most compassionate caring individuals on display here. America’s finest!!

[@barneyronnie]

Did you embrace the gay lifestyle later? I hope that you found happiness.

[@gerardmackay8909]

@@barneyronnie oh sure I did (more mid/late 20s than early 20s) I properly came out in 1987 and had some great times and my life has been a fortunate one. I got together with my now husband in 1991 and we celebrated 30 years last November. Thank you so much for your kind wishes

[@wcan4113]

parabens..

[@Andromeda680]

i've made my way to this video after 5 or 6 days of researching archives...because i saw ONE comment thread on the internet by some 20-somethings talking about how HIV and AIDS "aren't a big deal anymore" and "it's just a status, not a death sentence" and then advocated for taking zero precautions while dating, having sex, (implied) doing drugs, etc, without protecting oneself, because "that [the infection] doesn't even happen now". and i could not believe how.....*sigh*.........it is SO enraging to read something like that thrown out so casually and knowing people actually believe and live by that. enraging and terrifying and just, sad. i'm not a "younger gen doomsdayer" by any means, i actually think they're pretty interesting and brilliant as a whole, but god damn...just a fraction of a percent of the population having that mentality, is all it takes to cause the stats we have today. or even a resurgance. 40 mil dead. 1 mil dead last year. nearly 80 mil total infections worldwide. 30% of the population don't know their status. very few can afford the drugs. it's a TRAGEDY, the biggest tragedy any of us will ever remember. i was born in '81 so literally ALL of my earliest media memories, and so sosososo much in the following decade or so, has been completely saturated with this tragedy. this anxiety, this sorrow, this powerlessness, and all the warnings that came along with those feelings, while everyone fumbled in the dark. my memories of this media started around age 4 or 5, having the luxury of a couple years of childhood innocence before my parents started letting me watch "real tv" with them. i am grateful that my parents afforded me these few years. probably until it became unavoidable. because ever since learning of it, it has become an inescapable black cloud over life. i feel almost like it's how our grandparents lived through and talked about polio. the other thing that's disturbing to me about this "not caring" and "not preventing" because "it doesn't really happen" and "but even if it does my life won't be affected at all" attitude is, most people afflicted STILL cannot afford even the worst of the worst of the most ancient, ineffective, toxic, resistant medications available. most people in america can't even afford a short prep period so as not to infect their fetus, or not infect their partner while trying to conceive, for just a few months let alone an entire relationship indefinitely, and those are just the bougie america problems. forget about anyone in africa and asia, they've been completely left in the dust, sacrificed, discarded, with no such american "hiv is over" false hope, their dollars not able to compete globally for even a week's worth of meds let alone a lifetime. all those people will die grisly deaths. and apparently no one wants to talk about how the medications fuck you up so badly that most people would rather deal with an impending AIDS or ARC diagnosis and just figure it out then, than to have to take them every day of their life, which in itself directly leads to the spread of the disease. but these young people are saying "hiv is over". my gawd. lord forgive em because they know not what they say. 80 million actual confirmed cases: half are dead, half are alive. tell those 80 million people that AIDS is over. tell all the people interviewed here and sharing their stories from ground zero SF / NYC that "AIDS isn't a big deal". seeing this careless attitude even once compels me to immerse myself in these stories, pay tribute on behalf of the people who are too callous to, and try to stay educated. *sad*

[@Tfichtenbaum]

Andromeda680 it'd because people still believe that it's only a "gay disease " despite the fact that it has been proven to effect everyone ,now it switched demographics , being women and African American men with high rates of infection . It makes my angry that with all the information and knowledge out there HIV infection rates continue to rise . It isn't a walk in the park taking the anti- retroviral meds, IN high school I had people who where HIV postive and AIDS activists visit my school and talk to us about their experence .scared me enough to take precautions .. it may be chronic disease but it still is a very serious disease that still kills people .

[@Andromeda680]

i remember the AIDS / sex ed thing starting in 4th grade. so age 9. 1990. the ryan white thing and the show 'life goes on' massively propelled this i think. and we continued to have AIDS education every single year, sometimes twice a year. health class, biology, PE, home room...they were all talking about hiv on a continuous basis (growing up in both the san diego area and later the seattle area) -- i guess JUST IN CASE we forgot! and it was no 5-minute talk like i hear is common now. it'd take up days, sometimes a week. slide shows, speakers, workbooks, texts, learning the biology of viruses, videos, movies (i can't even count how many times i've seen 'and the band played on' and 'philadelphia'), prevention, medical equiment that protects you, talking about hemophilia, IV drug use, the blood supply...the whole shebang. nothing was left unaddressed after all those years of it getting drilled into our heads. i hear these days that it's very common for kids, at some random point in school, will get a quick sex ed class once where they they get fast overviews of birth control and diseases, they talk about AIDS for 10 minutes, and that's that. i can't even imagine what that must be like????? so imagine this unpreparedness when some kid in high school or college gets tested & told they have HIV. i would think that would be totally devastating. but it's not :(

[@8COSMIC8]

Well said

[@FriendofDorothy]

What I would say to any young person who says HIV is no big deal anymore is "Really? Well, I have two words for you: SIDE EFFECTS." Nearly as many people have died or at least suffered terribly from the side effects of HIV meds as the virus itself! Yes, the meds are more refined now but many of the early long term survivors paid a terrible price and essentially acted as guinea pigs to get us where we are now.. And yet what those earlier long term survivors went through was swept under the rugs by doctors who did not want to create hysteria or discourage their patients from taking what was available at the time and big pharmacy for whom the new meds were very profitable. One only needs to open to the first pages of a gay news magazine to see why no one wants to talk about side effects. Hello? They aren't making their biggest advertising revenue by selling ads for rainbow coffee mugs! Ever noticed you don't see a lot of articles about HIV med side effects in gay magazines? If you are not scared of HIV in 2018 then that's fine but I suggest you read the fine print as to the potential side effects even the current meds can have. It's pretty sobering. These medications are not exactly like popping baby aspirin. I know we all want to do the denial dance, but honey, get that magnifying glass out and read those damn side effects before you go kidding yourself about how "easy" it is to take HIV medications for the rest of your life. There is no such thing as medications without some potential side effect and HIV meds have enough to fill all those pages with all that teensie weensie print nobody wants to read in two and three page medication advertisements in our gay magazines. Yes, you will see 2 hot guys smiling and cycling together in those ads; there is a reason both have to get their blood drawn at least every 4 months and it's not just to check their viral loads : can anyone say "liver and kidneys"?

[@spocksvulcanbrain]

Andromeda. I'm a clinical pharmacist who worked with one of the physicians in this film. I just want to get out there, to all those who think this is now no big deal, that these medications are not benign. Yes they are very effective at suppressing the virus. However, they play havoc with the body - altering fat metabolism, upsetting the endocrine system, and resculpting the body's morphology just to name a few. It's better to prevent infection than to have to endure a lifetime of these drugs. I just can't understand how using a condom is so bad for that 5 minute thrill. Is not using one really a good trade off for a lifetime infection? And there's also the very real possibility that the virus will eventually mutate to be resistant to all the medications we have. It breaks my heart to think of returning to seeing walking corpses with KS, blindness with MCV, dementia with crypto, toxo and PML when it's so easy to prevent it. After 24 years and so many friends, partners and patients dying, I had to leave HIV care as I just couldn't take it anymore.

[@roland6357]

Wow: I was a bit too young to be out at the beginning of the AIDS endemic. But not to young when it reached Columbus Ohio. I remember the person who was the first AIDS death, I actually knew him, in Franklin County. The fear, and the terrible, terrible things we did to each other if one tested positive. The number of my friends lost. I was a member of a local club at age nineteen. By 1989 I was the only one of us left. When it was brought up in the documentary about losing your life's witness. I lost all of my life's witnesses and all five of my best very good friends. One can never replace the people in your life who are gone because of a disease. It wasn't an accident. It wasn't old age. It wasn't moving away and losing track. Or just growing away from someone. It was something that happened to us, we couldn't change it. And we, all of us lost something special.

[@MargaretNolan-c1t]

You didn't have "five best very good friends" and you should be old enough to know that by now. You had five men you partied and had sex with. Any person, straight or other, is fortunate to have one or two GOOD friends. You sound like a guy who never grew up.

[@joyleenpoortier7496]

This was probably best program I have watched on this subject. Being a retired nurse who nursed through this era I do remember the horror that fell upon the victims. 😢

[@atrocchia]

For gay men (and lesbians, our allies) living through the 1980s & 1990s, we definitely have PTSD.

[@theoreticalviews2939]

❤

[@Slambam73]

Yes; I see it in people when they talk about their experiences ❤

[@quadencaroline3368]

Who wouldn t? Which fighters could get through fear of so many sudden unexplained death(s...) and such amount of public despise at the same time, and not have post trauma? No one. The fight u had to live/survive (and organize! No internet, phone calls prices then!...i remember carrying tons of paper i gathered around to help Act up, because any spared expenses were worth using the muscles i had, while others were getting ill. It was an impressive amount of work to just spare enough office stuff to pay the phone bills then! Other times than nowadays social networks efficiency/costs!) is, i strongly and more and more believe it, one of the most incredible one in human history. An example to anyone who cares about human rights. The amount of courage u put together to survive these days is...still unbelievable! I thank u all for showing what humans can do together in the hardest times (could be very useful for young generation to learn about what gay activists created as new ways to fight, to help them face the ecological disaster they ll have to deal with because of persisting killing governements denial. Greed still kills). I really hope u manage to live as well as possible with this PTSD. Take care, u deserve peace after that terrifying war against illness and ignorance. U ve all been so so so BRAVE. Impressive example. Thank u so much.

[@andytaylor5476]

I agree. It's like a gaping sore. People don't take it seriously, but its a part of me

[@wlee55]

Thanks, Paul and Molly. You gave Dawn and me a role model in 1986 when there was none. I shall always appreciate the education I got under Connie Wofsy at SFGH.

[@newlifeaa]

wlee55 well said what a honor it must be to have had them as teachers

[@k.simmons862]

I know and have known many that died from this disease. I’ve been out since 1999/2000 and it’s still heartbreaking. I couldn’t have imagined it during those times.

[@bigmomma3265]

I'm 19 now, and educating myself on all this stuff. Interesting how schools hardly touched on any STDs, and I never knew anything about how harmful they were until I started doing the research. Most kids my age still have no idea, and they act in dangerous ways because of it.

[@lionelmartinez9090]

I’m 20 but listen AIDS don’t really kill anymore

[@brega6286]

@@lionelmartinez9090 Don't be so confident ! Any day the medications could become ineffective .

[@CooksFSH]

The amazing work of brave health care professionals made the biggest difference. These people are heroes!

[@Afib95]

I entered the nursing career at 92 I should say 1992 and at that time my brother-in-law who is also a nurse was positive with aids full-blown and the cocktail doesn’t work for him. I remember from the very first of course I was 31 or 32 and I treated every one of my patients with the upmost respect in many times got chastised for not wearing gloves or counting up and all that but I just couldn’t bring myself to be less than a human towards another human

[@kesfatih]

God bless all this people who helped at that time!It made me cry.

[@Girrrrrrrrrrrrrl66]

I am 54 now and when I was 19 I mived to the gay area of Houston and watched an entire small 18 unit apartment complex of gay men die. I was the only one that was left. So scary. I wish my young gay brothers and sisters safety and long lives. I'm still here and I'm negative but the trauma! Is still with me

[@sfden50]

This is so hard to watch; even all these later, the faces of people I knew and loved.

[@thatgirl9759]

Sorry for your loss!

[@tommykiso3647]

Bless your heart

[@gazepskotzs4]

Meow, you are gorgeous!

[@danielmorse6597]

After all these years I still cry. I had to stop and continue an other day more than once. There was a time in my life i could not cry anymore. We became numb to it in some ways. Wave after wave of death. We had funeral parties where we would get together and promise to help bury each other. Meeting for dinner and being asked to be the one to pull the plug or executor of the estate. Rabid families were common and the homeless men because the good christian family came and took everything, even if it was not the dead mans things. The police could care less and so didn't the courts then. Some things have not changed.

[@thatgirl9759]

Daniel Morse--I'm so sorry that you went through that. That is so sad! Too many brilliant people died due to AIDS. I started reading about the early days of AIDS and I almost got obsessed with googling it because there are so many personal stories. I go from one story and go to the next. Next thing I know, I've been on the internet for hours. Very intriguing. I'm glad you made it through those days.

[@RebekahCurielAlessi]

This was beautiful. God bless everyone in the story: medical people, patients and we learning compassion ever so slowly. 🙏🏽

[@SurgeCess]

Extremely chilling stuff here, good watch though. I've been doing a lot of research on HIV & AIDS, especially those grim years in the 80s & 90s, just to get the facts in order for myself. Thanks for uploading this.

[@mariebernier3076]

Wow, I'm so happy to hear that you're interested enuf to go out of your way. It was scary as hell. I moved to NYC to attend art school in 1985. One of my classmates, Allison Gertz, tried sex with her bi male best friend one crazy night and contracted it. She died within months. Before she passed she spoke out as she was one of the first young, straight white females to contract it and use her position (we were at Parsons School of Design) to educate people about the wider risk.. We didn't even know if we could catch it by touching, hugging, drinking from the same cup. Terrifying. Because it was a death sentence and you would probably die within 2 years, so emaciated. Usually pretty young. It was horrible to see men in the street with Karposi's Sarcoma lesions on their hands, faces and necks. Sad, sad time, honey. PEACE and good health. Jennifer

[@donbustle5845]

This video and story is so well done. This is the third time i have watched. I am a retired R.N. and lived and worked in Los Angeles working for different home health agencies in the 80's . The hiv treatments were constantly changing and improving. I was lucky enough to see the advent of protease inhibitors being added to the cocktail that allowed real hope. I like many will never forget those trying times. Today the treatments are so good and advanced. I'm glad to have survived and still think about those who battled to the end. I will never forget them and that time of in my life. We should never forget.

[@andytaylor5476]

Wow, what a remarkable, important and powerful historical record of what happened, how people responded, the political aspects and heartfelt, often emotional first hand accounts of the early years of the epidemic. I'm a long time San Francisco resident (since 1978) and a gay man. The film was a time warp and brought back so much of those horrible, hopeful, sometimes humorous moments of our lives then. I'm grateful for the producers of this fine film. Blessings all around to those we've lost, to those who were touched by this horrible disease. and to those who contributed to help those in need.Thank you.

[@MM-hq2xb]

andy taylor Andy I have watched several documentaries regarding HIV/AIDS. I am so glad you lived through it. I’m sure you felt as though you were living a nightmare.

[@mdenmark604]

EXACTLY. Amazingly well made&compasionate docu.

[@robertjohnston7511]

this brimgs tears to my eyes ...thank you for uploading this video

[@ShanteYouStay]

This was such a well produced documentary. I'm glad I discovered it.

[@billcordell9797]

I have a friend here in dallas that was diagnosed as hiv + by his family doctor in the mid to late 1980’s. Upon hearing his doctor say your test came back poz, he said to his doctor okay so what do we do now and his doctor said if I were you I’d get a gun and go home and kill myself. Unbelievable how wonderful these doctors, nurses and caregivers were almost right from the beginning to those with AIDS. It took a while for the rest of the country.

[@Untilhecomes85]

Did he pass?

[@brandon17760]

thats so fucking terrible... how can any person be that way to another human

[@M60gunner1971]

His doc gave him sound wisdom

[@WW-jh2ge]

This is why I hate Texas. Yes, I realize that was just one doctor back then, and a doctor like that could be anywhere, but for fuck sakes.

[@iEatBabiesDuh]

1980s was a death sentence and the fear of death wasnt so much the problem, but rather the stigma and the suffering beforehand. As cruel as the doctor seemed, that was likely why he said that.

[@Kim-mz8co]

This was not easy to watch. I am so thankful for all of the pioneers who started so early to address the needs of people living with HIV in a loving way. I know it wasn't easy for them or for caring survivors. I made a promise to Cleve Jones in 1984 that I would do what I could and I did as a pioneer and activist in Arizona and Southern California facing ostracism and threats University officials and students, my parents, and the general community. I was tasked with helping to set up Arizona's first free and anonymous HTLV-III antibody testing site by the Maricopa County Medical Director in the summer of 1985. There were no support services available when we started the program. I was consoling crying people in the Health Department parking lot. The armed services of the United States were sending recently medically discharged soldiers with a letter with my name on it to me to explain what it meant to have already tested positive. The government required me to tell women who tested positive that it had to be a false positive because they weren't in a high risk group. (Of course, I told women what the government had told me to say, but also cautioned them with precautions and next steps since a virus cannot discriminate.) After setting up the program in the summer with a nurse, I had to quit my paying job as a counselor with the health department in the fall, take out loans to complete my master's degree, and volunteer distributing food boxes because the School of Social Work refused to give me credit for the work I was doing as a counselor. The School of Social Work Field Advisor chuckled and said there was no way he would supervise me in a position "working with THOSE people." It was not an easy time for any of us. I'm 66 now. Many friends didn't make it past their 20s and 30s. (In case you might see this, I know you are not happy with me now Cleve after my failure to produce a book, but I will always love, respect, and honor you for all you have contributed and endured.) Thank you for this important documentary.

[@williamorich7531]

I remember our first AIDS case in Lethbridge. They roped him off with a sign "our first AIDS case". I went beyond the rope shook his hand and said loudly "I'm sorry your health issue was announced in a sign. "I would like to put a rope around them and put a sign up "our one millionth hemroids patient ". I came back the next day to visit my grandfather. He didn't have the rope or a sign around him. We have to make sure we give them their dignity back.

[@ProdigiousHdawg]

This was a well-done documentary. I felt it did a good job of getting to the heart of the humanity of the issue, while at the same time acknowledging the very real sadness and devastation that occurred. But I appreciated that it was also mentioned that not everyone died, and that there were in fact people who were able to hang on to life long enough to be there for the advent of better meds. Because that's also a real part of the story that I feel isn't usually talked about as much.

[@MrHubb1]

My heart goes out to all of you that went through this terrible time and of course all that lost loved ones . I am 42 but I remember being 14 knowing I was gay and scared of not knowing if AIDS would come into my life.

[@heidigone]

Does anyone know what song is playing in the very beginning of this documentary? I'm losing my mind, trying to figure it out!

[@MiracleFound]

17;43 That hit home! I remember families coming and kicking out friends and significant others, taking away the patient's support symptoms. It was horrible for everyone.

[@jeffreyfrist7610]

I am now 62. AIDS has nearly liked off my generation of gay men. I came out in ‘84 in northeastern Indiana. 2 years later, I volunteered as a buddy for one of 2 gay men who dead from AiDS in Fort Wayne, In. They were the first people living with AIDS. Fast forward to 2001, I am living in the Castro, and working at CPMC-Davis campus in San Francisco. CPMC-Davis was one of the first hospitals that took care of AIDS patients since it is very near the Castro. It was so eerie to work there 20 years after the epidemic of AIDS. What an experience. I was and still am HIV negative. I am one of the lucky one’s

[@RICHMOND94114]

such a powerful film. thank you.

[@alexanderleatherman]

I was immediately violent with violent food poisoning in 2009 on a road trip with a friend to San Francisco and I only had Cal. State. poverty limit insurance (Medi-Cal), and the treatment I got even in one day was just, It was just so human. I wish in San Diego the staff in hospitals had the level of humanity that the nurses did in San Francisco.

[@gazepskotzs4]

r u ok now?

[@danielmorse6597]

The people in SF were and are the best.

[@paulortiz8063]

My lover, Phillip Ryder Ortiz, died in early '93. But i wanted him to survive for another 12-18 months because i knew real life saving medical and pharmaceutical help was on the way and about to arrive. Unfortunately he couldn't servive. He died exactly 28 years, 6 days, and 2 hours ago. My life hasn't been the same since. It isn't nearly as much fun. Nor as interesting. And neither is San Francisco!

[@nikicarrie4071]

❤️

[@jaimemontes3775]

Extraordinary video! I've had HIV for 20 years and still fighting it. Thanks to my Dear Lord and my incredible doctors I'm still living a normal life..

[@bernardofitzpatrick5403]

👏❤

[@desmondgallagher5648]

Hi there. I got told I had this thing in 2003. It’s now 2024. Undetectable virus and cd4 630. Visit Dr once a year. The medicine is amazing…Thank you Dr David Ho.❤ How awful for the people who were lost to this disease when there was no effective treatment. When I watch DramadDad videos my heart breaks and I get upset. Take care Man. A decade from now there will be a functional cure. Hang in there and keep taking your tablet a prescribed. Desmond. Manchester UK❤

[@musicguy20]

I’m only in my 30s and I remember my lesbian friends (a couple) who used to live in Miami (she’s Cuban) and she would tell me so many stories of so many friends she lost during the AIDs epidemic in Miami. It scared me so much hearing about it. And very sad that wonderful beautiful gay men dropping like flies. Imagine how the world would be if we never lost them?

[@KimPhilby203]

God comfort those with this disease

[@mily87ful]

This is a great documentary . I hear a lot of younger gays that say you aren’t real gay unless you are positive . It kills me to even think the amount of lack of responsibility, and knowledge the new generation has. It goes against all the struggle of the gay movement from the 80s. I see a lot of irresponsibility now a Days.

[@mily87ful]

robison87 yes it breaks my heart.

[@jdocean1]

That’s just absolutely bizarre that they would think that way of a terrible medical illness. Almost a anti-life stance.

[@Arbiteroflife]

That's terrifying people think that...

[@Wulf_Hogan_Entertainment]

It would be so terrifying to see loved ones rapidly die around you. So sad.

[@hettyphilips]

I started thinking about AIDS again when the world had to contend with the COVID-19 pandemic. We never know what is lurking around the corner.

[@txtom]

It's Pride Month 2023. I'm seeing this video for the first time. As a 67 year old gay man, who managed a gay bar, in Texas, during the 80s I was surprised to see a hiv/aids video enlighten me. Having lost two lovers, to hiv/aids (first one in 1991, second one about 5 years later) it was nice to hear some positive unknown (to me) information on the topic. Being in Texas back then we were forewarned. HIV seemed to start on the east/west coastlines before it showed up here. But since my life was a bar life, I lost a lot of friends and went to a lot of funerals. We also had lots of benefit shows at the bars trying to raise money to help the sick and bury the dead. Even the funeral homes didn't want to touch the bodies! One bar owner made a deal with a funeral home to cremate the bodies. So many were disowned by families and ended up in a paupers grave! Very sad times. If you've ever seen the movie Longtime Companion, it's a bit like that. We were all just trying to enjoy life and folks just started dying left and right!

[@kathyullah1619]

I watched the Film called NORMAL HEART by Larry Kramer and it broke my heart how American Goverment treated them

[@SharonDrummond-by6of]

I have had hiv for 19 years I was scared thanks so much for progress and caring understanding people . I am so sorry for those family members that did not stand a chance lots of love to others going through it ❤

[@tednorton5150]

I had a friend who should have made it: died in 2001. The combination of such tragedy and the miracles that made it from early eighties diagnosis. It's so hard to describe the stew of emotions but anyone who was in the gay community in the 80s has this bond: this "thing" that is like living through a war together.

[@sebastianfisher957]

Simply, they, the doctors and nurses and ALL the support staff are the HEROES! The patients themselves, SUPER BRAVE. Let's pray that we are near the corner to beating this disease to death. A really important video. Well done and thank you for producing this doco. BRILLIANT!!!!!

[@newlifeaa]

This was truly done very well. I would like to say thank you to all who was there at the start, late 70's till now. A big thank you for this short film and, all whom had a hand in it. Well done. I do hope that with the years that pass we do not see anything like we did, and still do in us as people. To not help, not love but place judgement on to others we do not know, understand, all in a blink of an eye forgetting we are all people.

[@haroldbhoy67]

newlifeaa A lovely comment. God bless all the victims of this terrible disease and respect to all those that helped and dealt with it and still do now. Best wishes from Scotland.

[@LG-33]

I was working in San Francisco at Garden Sullivan Hospital with all these men dying of AIDS in the 90’s. ❤️💜❤️💜

[@indy_go_blue6048]

I was an RN and took care of my first AIDS patient in 1982. I had a tremendous amount of sympathy for those infected when they were ignorant of this horrible disease, but that sympathy ended with the second and third waves of infection later in the decade. When you know something can kill you and you know how to avoid it and you keep doing it, then it's on you.

[@shieldsup2076]

A lot of people in poor, uneducated places - even in America - still don't know. Viral loads in clusters of hiv positive gay men are higher in poor and uneducated places, because of bad healthcare, which is why rates of transmission are higher among certain groups of people. It's a very complex issue. Do you feel this moral outrage for victims of syphillis or other diseases? It seems easier to be cruel against victims of hiv for some reason. Homophobia plays a part.

[@da96103]

As a medical personnel, your job is to take care of patients and not to judge them. Every new generation requires health education. Do you treat a HIV positive patient who got his disease from unprotected sex different from one that gets it from blood transfusion.

[@stassitaylor7799]

indy_go_blue60 I agree. I have no sympathy for those who engage in high risk behavior in knowing the consequences.

[@shoti66]

Nothing Burger and by the way stupid. What type of god gives children HIV? Fuck that sick sack of shit and his sick sack of shit followers like you.

[@shoti66]

Nothing Burger who’s in the closet? Not me. Out and proud asshole.

[@patwats8860]

I lost my brother in 92. I remember the fear of the invisible avalanche we knew was out there but we didn’t know what it was. Our daughter was about nine. We didn’t know what might infect her. Our family misses my brother still. We lost so many people in those years.

[@suzanneforgione1018]

So many innocent men died of this awful disease. We truly lost a whole generation. To think of what could’ve been had they survived. May the all Rest peacefully xo

[@ApothecaryGrant]

I could not understand the denial of people who wanted to keep the bath houses to remain open . I still cannot .

[@sintitulo]

This was beautiful. Thank you.

[@kathyullah1619]

These true documenarys should be shown in High School universitys

[@michelecryer5322]

Thank you for making this film. It is so wonderful to see that there were people willing to be compassionate to those suffering with this illness, I'm so very sorry for all that suffered, those that actually caught the virus, in whatever way, and their families and friends who had to watch them lose their lives. We really do have to ensure that newer generations learn about the early days of the epidemic, and that it hasn't gone away. We don't want them to become complacent, or for our bodies to

[@michelecryer5322]

Apologies for cutting off early. I meant to say that we don't want the virus to become resistant to the drugs that are currently allowing those who are HIV+ to survive. Please practise safe sex.

[@FredericKahler]

Wonderful recap of the efforts and humanity afforded those of us without any hope. Uplifting. Nurse power!

[@robertyoung7823]

I'm not a gay man but gay men and women are people to. God bless the Gay community. Live and let live

[@barbaragaskins7914]

Man shouldn't lay with man for it is an abomination and those who doeth this wickedness will not inherited the Kingdom of Heaven. Be careful of your tongue. You are asking blessings for wickedness.

[@whatcanisay3862]

@@barbaragaskins7914what a joke! It was marked and blamed on gay men by the media as if only they spread hiv, ppl died gay or straight alike. U need to grow up and maybe your god will help you with it.

[@TheFuckinInfluence]

@@barbaragaskins7914shut up, barb 🙄

[@angelopaoletti4768]

Beautiful video, which demonstrates the resilience of many, doctors, nurses, operators, who were not frightened by the unknown, but rather drew from it the determination to build, try, face the darkness to give a little light and much love, to strangers who, even if rejected by their real families, found more, in these people, who not only carried out their work, but built protection networks, to the many, too many, who flew to Heaven... May they rest in peace, warmed by the Eternal Light.

[@yendang5403]

I was a kid during the 1980's and I remember hearing a lot about HIV and AIDS on the news and it was a terrifying time. Although, I was a kid, I was scared to touch door knots and being around HIV people. I thought I could catch HIV by touching the same door knot that HIV people touch. During the 1980's, people weren't sure how we could catch HIV, so there was a huge panic. By the time I was in my 20's during the 1990's, I was terrified of having sex with men, even with condoms. I didn't have intercourse until I was in my late 20's. Every time, I meet a guy, I assumed that he has HIV immediately. In my mind, every gay man had HIV and AIDS. For two decades, HIV and AIDS dominated our society.

[@aaronrosenberg6633]

@Matt Beeman Man, your stupid is so thick.

[@aaronrosenberg6633]

@Matt Beeman No, but I have several straight male friends who get pegged regularly by their wives. Attempting to label a sexual orientation by a single sex act is impossible. If you think it stands to reason that Yen could have been getting "some good pussy" the whole while, you would also conclude that it's just as easy for you to be a receptive partner in gay anal sex. And so, perhaps that's why you enjoy talking about it.

[@brega6286]

Good to be as careful as possible. The drugs used now may not continue working in the future.

[@YimidhiirWakaminPama]

Wow! That’s scary! I was born in 1991, so I was born whilst it was still spreading globally. It sounds like it was a scary time!

[@Migbie]

Who knows, maybe if u hadnt waited you could have been unfortunate enough to catch it. 😢

[@richardbell7414]

Those that survived the disease must feel like waking up to a new dawn

[@rickovery]

We do.

[@redcropuk]

I feel indebted to each envy one of those who died ....their deaths were not in vain

[@danielmorse6597]

Sometimes it is a ghost world we walk. Sometimes I still see and hear the ones who have gone. It is an illusion in some ways. God, so many of them were beautiful men and women just hitting their prime. Lives cut short. No one remembers so many of them. So many were just gone one day. Walking through empty apartments full of the remains of men and women's lives. One guy gave me his cowboy boots. He was dead the next day. I have them in storage still.

[@danielmorse6597]

I do also.

[@M60gunner1971]

Don’t you mean a new dawn of ass fucking?

[@star7communicator]

I wished I was taught more about this growing up in the 90's/2000's. An ongoing epidemic, that peaked less than a decade before my birth... finding that out on my own was so unbelievably messed up. We learned absolutely nothing from this travesty.

[@YimidhiirWakaminPama]

Same. I was born in 1991, and that’s when it hit the peak here in Australia I believe. I’m just now learning about it in depth because they never taught us about it enough in high school. They glossed over it.

[@romeomarks8344]

I feel for the family and the victims I can imagine what they went through at that time must of been very traumatic

[@kyrvhy]

Just seeing this now for the first time. So powerful and so important to world history. I too am one of the lucky ones and hope our youth may learn their history and learn from the model of San Francisco and remember how fortunate we are and how fragile is our Freedom.

[@edfilchev5202]

Came here after watching incredible docudrama “When we rise”. Glad to see real-life Cleve and Diane here

[@PlusJean]

Thanks, for sharing these Great People !

[@jasonmanning6317]

I just started dating a man for the first time a month ago, and it’s been like stepping foot into a whole new world with a rich heritage. I have such respect for the gay men that were pioneers and died so I could have the freedom I have. And thank you to everyone that has made it so I can have PrEP for free so I don’t have to be afraid of HIV.

[@brega6286]

Hope the drugs keep working (most don't)because changing lifestyle is oh just too hard ! Like being very careful, using protection, not being promiscuous.....

[@barneyronnie]

Abstinence goes a long way!

[@matthewvance4277]

I was diagnosed 1991 feb 3rd...Im 55 today...Knoxville Tn here

[@corkycobon1481]

It breaks my heart to see this to see what inhumanity was happening during the beginning but I am completely in awe and admiration of the doctors and nurses in SF that really dived in head first into what was happening and change the health care model for not only HIV/AIDS but for palliative care for the terminally ill in general. The work of these true heroes has done not only for the patients but for the families and the general public is truly immeasurable. The patient-centric health care model, which was sooo hard fought for then, is the bare minimum standard of care now. It is harrowing watching this and hearing the stories but they need to be told so that horrors of that time are never experienced again. RIP to all those that were lost to this disease. May God bless and keep them.

[@miketalley5476]

I remember those days as "The Dying Time". I barely made it through and was able to catch the "lifeboat". But even the lifeboat had it's drawbacks, as we suffered the crippling side effects of the medications. Everyone who we through that, knows exactly what I'm talking about.

[@louisdewit4429]

Yes i do. Not myself but through then, 1991, my ex who never really became an ex but more a ‘situation’. He did not make it. He got aids a year too early so to speak coz died in ‘93 a year before better medication came available. The strange thing is that now i’m older, 65, much deeper mourning started to kick in and somehow now i miss him terribly. Perhaps a sign that i’m really getting older and more sentimental. Good that you held on. Hope you don’t mind me saying but after peeking at your photo, must conclude, your looks definitely did. 😊

[@miketalley5476]

@@louisdewit4429 I'm sorry for your loss. I understand exactly how you feel.....Thanks, I appreciate the compliment. I guess I'm not half bad (for an old man of 65) if I do say so myself. The young guys do seem to keep my "dance card" full. Why, I don't know.

[@louisdewit4429]

@@miketalley5476 - why ? Very manly, protective, (daddy like) and good sexy looks. I guess you also made an effort. At the gym. Thank you.

[@elenagura4055]

🤮

[@sharonrigs7999]

In July of 1989, my Uncles Rick and Pablo died of AIDS within weeks of each other. They were the kindest, gentlest people I have ever known. They were the only adults that always had time for me. They would play catch or paint with me when the other grown ups shooed me away. RIP You will never be forgotten ❤