Love and Attachment 122013

What is the difference between love and attachment? The Buddhist way of understanding our emotions is that attachment is the neurotic, needy, dissatisfied part of us that yearns for someone out there, believing that when we get him or her, we'll be happy. And love is the wish for another to be happy. So how do we reconcile these two when love and attachment are all mixed up together in our relationships? This talk will be a perfect introduction to Venerable Robina's inimitable style of explaining Buddha's teachings.
Biography
Born in Australia in 1944, Ven. Robina Courtin spent the early part of her life studying classical singing, being involved with the radical left/feminist activism and then, in her quest for a spiritual path, studying martial arts. She became a student of Lama Yeshe and was ordained as a Tibetan Buddhist nun at Kopan Monastery in 1978. Since then, she has worked full-time for the Foundation for the Preservation of the Mahayana Tradition (FPMT) in several roles; editorial director of Wisdom Publications, editor of the Mandala Magazine, and director of the Liberation Prison Project. Since 1987 she has taught Buddhist courses and retreats at FPMT centers worldwide. Well-known for her intense energy and no-nonsense manner of expressing her profound understanding of Buddhist philosophy, Ven. Robina is the subject of an award-winning documentary, "Chasing Buddha" and a film by Christine Lundberg called "On the Road Home".

[@ethicalphytophage]

Venerable Robina is one of the clearest teachers I have heard to date. I hope she continues teaching for a long, long time. Thank you for your teachings and your clear communication, Venerable Robina. Best wishes.

[@coralclark5979]

Thank you do much. And happy birthday!🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@shannonparker7404]

Struggling with a massive attachment crush on a friend today. This video, came up. Wishing more blessings and thanks than can be imagined.

[@devinramos6317]

I love ❤️ her sooooooo much !!!!!♥️🙏🏼♥️

[@weskil79]

You are great. This world has gone mad and it needs our compassion. Much love

[@JasonGafar]

Such a wonderful teaching with precious jewels of wisdom to aid us all on the path of awakening. One thing I love about Venerable Robina is her courageous approach of looking truth in the eye. She does't shy away from it which is I do feel is tremendously effective. Attachment is something which is tremendously difficult to recognize let alone to be freed from.

[@MiriamSPia]

I first saw this woman on a Google talk. I felt she was vivacious, which is a compliment.

[@MyMaitetxu]

Brilliant way of explaining it, thank you Venerable Robina

[@jenniferwee1383]

Thank you Ven. Robina for exposing our deepest motivations and making it so stark.. A highly realized 69 year old nun with the energy of a 30 year old..

[@dineshlamarumba4557]

if instead of those youtube pranks and music videos, views of this kink of videos was larger, than their would be more peace in our world.

[@oinsters]

Thankyou Ven. Robina

[@aahhhyess]

from a truth seeker, i appreciate her appetite & value her sharing. thx for upload!!!

[@holyfoolishness]

thank you for making these videos available!

[@kaseyac78]

Love her and this topic. Just awesome....

[@DagmaraD1]

At the beginning i found it hard to follow her because of the way she talks, but I realized that it is what made me watch her from the beginning till the end. She is very wise and very human. thanks for sharing the video.

[@blueskys8814]

WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW! SOOOOOOOO SOOOOOOOOOO HAPPY AND REJOICING. :) :)

[@blueskys8814]

1:06:30 - 1:09:39 WOW very very eye opening :)

[@saccakhoj]

For me, the concept of I got more annihilated by understanding 5 aggregates (than dependent origination) because you can see that nothing amongst 5 aggregates is under my control but all conditioned. But real wisdom comes when in calm mind (achieved during meditation), you start seeing thoughts arising and passing - u see their impermanence and not-self nature.Dependent origination is useful in seeing the optional link (from feelings to craving)... that's the place we need to work. This is done by being mindful of feeling as feeling and not relishing the feeling so that it turns into craving. Like when I feel cold, I note "feeling of cold" is like this, I avoid thinking that "I am feeling cold"

[@sennomastrangulo7932]

Silenciosa Vespertina, I might be wrong, but I think that a buddhist is not aiming to become a stone, or emotionless, featureless nothing. At least it is not the teaching of Buddha. However, you are absolutely right that a buddhist is supposed to be a calm, peaceful person. You can have a wide range of emotions, still being calm in the center of your mind. Emotions, personal features, body with all its inclinations, all these are product of karma, you can not avoid them, there is no point to fight with them, one should accept them understanding one's true nature. Once understood that, one can be mere observer of all emotions and thoughts running in the mind and body, but not participating, attaching or associating with them. I might be wrong.

[@islanddweller4643]

Buddhists are no different than anyone else. Robina is a spirited individual - that is who she is. I think people have a charicature of a buddhist - and it is wrong.

[@saccakhoj]

[@50:19 min] I think a small part of her answer about the victim was wrong [may be it came out of her mouth because she speaks too fast :)] The part were she said "how dare this person harm you": is focusing outside on the person's actions and feeling of "how dare" is I think delusional (with expectations how other's should act). People are acting according to their conditioning, so we can expect anything. That's why we still have metta for such people too. BUT you don't hv to sit back and put up with abuse. You do what you can in a wholesome way to get out of the situation. We know that our thoughts are wholesome if they are devoid of greed, hate, delusion. Now in a domestic violence, why do people not get out to seek help? possibilities include: fear of infamy, fear of abuser, attachment to abuser, attachment to what abuser provides in other aspects, etc etc. So once underlying cause is to be found by the victim and should should work on that. Also, we in western society are very much outward focused. We need to look inside than outside, especially in case of emotional abuse- It helps highlight our own attachments (what the Buddha called the 8 winds). In past, what I used to call emotional abuse, I don't look at it that way any more. it helped me see where my attachment lied and when I saw the drawbacks of that attachment, my attachment loosened and so even though external situation remained the same, I was not emotionally abused (affected emotionally) by the situation

[@karthickselvakumar8709]

Quite the contrary - think she means we think "how dare" x y z.. With a sense of entitlement. She's describing for looking inwards than outwards 🙏

[@anyathomas6947]

Thanks

[@janiemiller825]

Question... doesn’t attachment come from “ trauma wounds “- inner child wounds- ( abuse- verbal, physical, emotional neglect, basically not having the basic psychological needs met- especially within the first 7 years of life

[@islanddweller4643]

Learn about karma. It explains a lot. Not to say the environment we live i does not impact us but we arrive with our tendencies and habits; we are born into circumstances as per our karma. Listen to Robina's 4 part series on karma. It explains a lot. I had to listen to it 3 times before it started to sink in.

[@maxinewood8220]

When a child is born they are totally dependant on their mother to get their needs met, if a childs needs are not getting met, then the child will be unhappy, could you please explain this more as i am confused. Thank you great video

[@islanddweller4643]

We are dependent on our mothers because we are babies. At that stage of life we do not have the cognition to examine our minds. As babies our needs are basic: food, love, protection, cleanliness. Robina is referring to adults with cognition.

[@reginadegiovanni6685]

🙇🙇🙇🙏🙏🙏🌹🌸🌹

[@mtm00]

22:25 Movie: 'War of the Roses' exemplifies.

[@ZiplineShazam]

I wish I had the guts to off myself. I'm tired of trying to pretend that I'm not attached. I'm tired of pretending to be something I'm not. This world sucks.

[@LunaLu-00]

+MrBeautifulba1 how are you feeling today? what you were(are?) feeling - other people feel too so you are not alone. we usually want to 'off' ourselves when we feel we are different and the others are not struggling. but they are. we are all struggling. the only difference is not to let yourself be consumed by it. then you will stop feeling 'tired' all the time. just be. in the present. don't 'try'. just be. world only 'sucks' because we don't know how to just be. nothing else. what do you think would an animal 'think' of this world? exactly! but they don't think, they don't 'try' to be or not to be anything, they just 'are'. present in the current moment. wish you luck. hope you feel better today :)

[@ZiplineShazam]

Luna L Thank You so Very Very Much !!! I am feeling better today and I truly appreciate your kind words and spirit !! Peace be with you !!

[@islanddweller4643]

Try to stop pretending and just learn to love and accept yourself. Then you can jump off from that basis. You will be okay.

[@silenciosavespertina8712]

Very clever woman and very interesting talk, but why does she not stop fidgeting? I thought Buddhists were supposed to be utterly calm and relaxed individuals?

[@rodolfocorona9963]

she is good, inteligent but she lacks carisma she speacks too fast and in a bad maner

[@MultiChewbaka]

I like her style. To say she speaks too fast and in a bad manner might be true to you, not to me tho'

[@reginadegiovanni6685]

Go to settings and put the speed at 75%